Nice to be back!
During my Yoof I used to smoke a large amount of skunk. Being a twatty, ratty teenager who clearly knew absolutely everything about everything – I would only smoke the strongest skunk I could get my hands on.

Over the course of a year I spent every day stoned. The first and last thing I would do every day was to smoke a joint. It took me some time, but, I eventually realized that this stuff was turning my brain into a completely empty void. I grew out of it as quickly as I had started doing it.

When walking home from the pub I used to walk across a very large common. It saved about twenty minutes off my journey going this way, but, the common was pitch black at night and quite spooky.

This particular Sunday evening was quite a misty October special. I was already quite stoned by the time I got to the common, but, decided that the best way to face the spooky misty common was to role up another spliff. Perched on a bench - the job was done in minutes and I happily started strolling across the common. The sun was setting and darkness was creeping up very quickly.

Now the first part of the common was open field. This finished at a huge wall of trees which formed the forest which had many large clearings and many thick, dense areas of woodlands until it finally opened up into another field and rejoined civilization.

As I approached the wall of trees I felt a strong wind come towards me. I was VERY stoned by this point and the chill unnerved me. I quickly realized that the wind was bringing in a more dense mist and by the time I was in the forest I could only see about 20 foot ahead of me. The Sky was now almost black.

It was then that I got my first glimpse. It took my heavily stoned brain a few seconds to compute what I was actually seeing. Through the mist were some bright balls of light. They had just instantly appeared. They were hovering a little above the tree lines. Due to the distortion of the light, through the mist, I could not work out there size or how far away they were – but they seemed to bob slightly.

“Stop being a twat” I thought. But being a twat was something I had mastered.

I decided to carry on walking and ignore them. Within five minutes I had regretted that idea. Out of know where another Orb appeared behind me. Then another. Then one appeared in front of me. Then one to my side. I was surrounded by about 8 of these bobbing orbs of light. There was no sound and there was no one else around in these woods.

The effect of the wind on the trees and the light made some of the most horrific looking shadows. I felt that unmistakable rush you feel when your body considers “flight or fight.

Mine choose Flight.

I fucking pegged it.

I got home panting and coughing – I banged on my door and my dad came and opened it.
I ran in and went to bed. Although I didn’t sleep.

The next day – I shot out of bed – I had this brain wave that if I could find some proof – I would be rich – and I might get to meet Dana Scully. And she was fit.

I grabbed my Polaroid and ran downstairs.

My eyes were instantly drawn to the local newspaper which was on the hall floor.

On the front page was an article showing the glowing orbs above the common

“shit – someones got there first”

I picked up the paper - Under the picture was the headline

“Council erect solar powered lights to aid dog walkers”

It must have been a slow week for the Guardian that week.
( KISS.ME.WHERE.I.POO Signed the sex offenders register on, Sun 6 Jul 2008, 0:49, 2 replies)

Strange happenings in Liberty City...
Whilst playing GTA 4 the other day I stole a rather nice Blista Compact, in said car there was only one person (the driver) but after driving the car around for a while a man got out when I stopped, where the piss did he come from?

As well as this I paused the game to go for a slash and when I came back what was the in-game time?

13:37

How very odd.
(chrisdood Why yes, I am the shizzle, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 23:38, 2 replies)

Ouija Board
In my teens my friends and I dabbled a bit with homemade Ouija Boards: individual letters, numbers and "Yes" & "No" written around a piece of paper, with a large coin where our fingers would meet.

Having a belief in the supernatural, some of the things we were being told and experiencing freaked me out a fair bit to be honest. All the while this was going on, I managed to just about convince myself that someone amongst us was taking the piss - that is until the very last time I ever used a board!

A group of us were in a park by a graveyard one summer, and decided this was the perfect place for an OB session (I know). We communicated with a few 'spirits' that afternoon, everything was friendly and dandy. Until the last one. The last spirit spelt out for the most part, gibberish. But of the coherent messages, it was clear it hated each one of us passionately. Asking to end the link, we were presented with a 'No' and then the coin dragging our fingers around the board at varying speeds, but always with strong force. This circling motion went on for about 20 seconds, before the coin became extremely hot - which all of us felt - forcing us to all withdraw our fingers and break the link! One of us threw the two-pence piece into a nearby hedge, never to be seen again.

People can think what they like, but after having my finger burnt like that, i'll never be able to dismiss Ouija very easily.
(jnewco81, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 23:22, 3 replies)

Unexplained
Or should I say that too much was left unexplained

The series finale of Doctor Who tonight.

Why did Davros design a console that could control all the Daleks?

How did earth survive being transported back to where it should be?

And why did all the daleks stop what they were doing and look at the indian woman that fell over (My guess on this one is that the daleks present were thinking of the risk assesment forms they would have to fill in so were checking everything was ok before calling HR)

Im also planning on going to Catherine Tate and shouting remember the Doctor at her to see if her brain explodes
(mon bison powered by magnets, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 22:45, 8 replies)

My Dad told me this story:
Once he was walking to go fishing across a field with my Uncle Ronnie, his brother-in-law, and apparently there was something floating in the air, except it was entirely stationary and rectangular, as if a building was erected but missing the bottom floors.

Dad: 'Erm, can you see that?'

Ronnie: 'Er, yeh...'

And they carried on walking and talking of other things.

This was sometime in the '70s and apparently their heads simultaneously just went 'tilt' and they carried on regardless.

His description: about the size of a double decker bus, about 60 foot up, a metallic box but not that shiny that it was reflective, and he could see pipes and bolts, square plates and hatches and such, as if it was just an ordinary earth bound object, save for the fact that it was above them, and they passed directly underneath it and it made no noise, it didn't move, and they felt nothing.

It stayed there and did absolutely nothing for a long while whilst they fished until eventually it was gone, they didn't see it leave, they heard nothing, they didn't speak of it, they carried on fishing, then they went home and told no-one.

My Dad told me this once when a tad drunk and we were alone, sometime in the '90s, and he seemed like he was confessing it, and seemed afraid something might happen by telling it, or that I would think less if him in some way.

He seemed scared, he's never scared, he's not that kinda guy, and I had to assure him I believed him.

And I do.

He thanked me.
( ..wil, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 20:35, 4 replies)

Big cat sighting with photo!!!!one!
I was on work business and unfortunately had the worst camera in the world with me, otherwise I'd be famous!

strolling through a field near Burton Bradstock in Dorset with my boss and some clients, gazing at the river as we usually do, when my boss uttered the immortal line:

"Fuck me! it's a panther!"

here it is
Photo

We figured that it was about the size of a big dog, alsatian or bigger.

it was jet black and definitely a cat, you could tell by the way it walked.

We found footprints as well, big and far apart.

I was so gutted to just have a shitty camera, if I'd had mine it's got such a zoom that I'd have been able to see what it had for breakfast...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 19:11, 7 replies)

UFO
I'm fairly UFO sceptic, but it was an object, it was flying and we couldn't identify it

I was on my way with a mate to my parents' place down a dual carriageway from Exeter at about ten to 1 in the morning. we could see two really bright lights (looked like big spotlights) one above the other in the sky, not that high and not that far away, but moving in the same direction as us at pretty much the same speed. All of a sudden it was caning it across perpendicular to our direction of travel and out of sight.

it was near the airport, but the direction was entirely wrong for anything approaching it. We did some research and there was no traffic in or out at that time.

plus the weirdness of these two lights.

I'm not claiming it's aliens or anything, but I have no idea what it was
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 19:06, Reply)

Two tales of terror

Story 1

When I was about 13 I was mucking about with a few mates by the river in my hometown. It was dark and we were walking along an unlit path when suddenly the lad I was walking beside got a right panic on and started frantically thrashing the air and throwing punches around. He then screamed and ran off and the rest of us being the pussies we were just ran with him.

As we slowed, he asked me in a terrified voice, "Didn't you see it?!" At that point I turned and looked and saw a clear humanoid outline in purple on the path back where he'd gone nutso. I shat it and ran with him off the path around the corner where the rest of our bunch were waiting.

Most of them were clueless as to what had spooked us, but when asked if they'd seen anything, a couple of them also described the purple shape I'd seen.

I still don't know what it was.

Story 2

A couple of years after the above happened, I was walking with a friend by the same river but a mile or so away from that incident. There's a bit where the path is interrupted by a deep trench which you have to clamber down, cross the mud via stepping stones, and then clamber up the other side. It's not something you can rush.

As we approached the trench I happened to glance behind and saw an old fella a couple of hundred yards back on the path. He was wheeling a bike with him, and I thought nothing of it.

My friend and I crossed the trench in the usual careful, laboured manner and began to walk the other side. I wondered how the old boy would manage with his bike n' all, since it's not a simple operation even for a young lad with no bike to hinder, so I turned round again, only to see the guy, bike and all, already on our side.

At the time I didn't really think about it or consider it too strange but later that day it hit both me and my friend - how the hell had this old chap, with a bike, covered 200 yards, AND crossed the trench in a matter of seconds?! Sure, he may have decided to hop on the bike pre-trench, but the mounting and dismounting alone would have taken almost as long as the time he took to ride/walk/climb/carry his bike to the other side.
(I'm afraid of wet bread, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 18:47, Reply)

So my friend who I was with the night mum died
had a husband who commited suicide 4 years ago.
She went to Sedona National Park a couple of weeks ago, and I saw her yesterday at the 4th July party.
She said she'd visited a psychic while out there, and that her husband had come through and apologized, and that there was also another woman trying to get through who kept saying "my daughter, my daughter".

I almost fucking slapped her.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 18:08, 3 replies)

The night I saw a ghost..
I must of been about 14 or 15. I had one of those really annoying laser pens that all kids my age had. One night I was testing the range of my laser pen out of my bedroom window.

I was moving it over walls, houses, the pavement, the grass - everywhere! When I pointed it just below my window into my next door neighbours garden.

There stood an old woman in a nightie looking straight forward at my neighbours house. She was slightly transparent, had a white nightie, looked very old and did not have feet - just hovering. I just froze! She didn't stop looking forward. I threw the pen across my room and hid under my cover for the rest of the night.

It sound's crazy but this still freaks me out to this day.
(cannibalklown, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 17:20, 2 replies)

company at night
Some friends did ham dram, and i occasionally got roped in as techie or worse: = onstage. I`d been in a production of pirates of penzance and it had been recorded, but there was variable buzz on the different nights from the lighting.

Where I worked then I maintained a load of radio studios. On the night shift after doing all my routines I was in fireman mode on a pager.

Perfect. they had one "production" studio which had the flight of steps, the doors and various locks and bolts and all the bits for radio sound effects, and a brilliant audio mixer, all the equalisers and kit and 3 state of the art tape machines.

Over a couple of weeks an hour or so a night, I tidied up debuzzed and edited and blended the performances into one "best of" and mastered a load of cassettes for the cast and crew.

It felt quite cosy, but every so often I thought i saw a reflection in the glass door that led to the control room. "oh it`s george with a cuppa"

The first night George the boss came down out of curiosity bearing tea, and saw what a job I had on "I don`t envy you I couldn`t work down here at this time of night"

I missed the point of that.

It was only when the labour of love was complete that old george told me that basement studio was haunted, as it was built in a former plague pit, and many people got the creeps without even being told.

He had a shock of white hair which looked like a 60`s black brylcreem da quiff, but white.

When I told him I kept thinking he had come down to check on me, he said no, I just wanted to see you were comfortable that first night, and I was waiting for you get spooked.
I was then, just a little. Reflection of old boy with grey hair in the corridor? or?

dunno It wasn`t frightening.
(tootired Is searching for a funny sig, nothing good so far, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 17:11, Reply)

The spookiest unexplained thing I have ever seen
Has an article about it:

Here
(EuroSong I love horse meat: best of all the animals, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 17:04, Reply)

At my Junior School
as I imagine was the case at every junior school there was a brief flirtation with ouijja boards etc.

This ended when a disabled student claimed she had been bitten by a ghost.

The vicar gave an assembly on it and everything.
( WormuIus, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 16:30, 1 reply)

Well, I'm pretty sure I can explain this,
but that's boring, so now, for more Tales of the Unexplaaaaained! Woooo!

(We'll have to go greyscale for this one; the old Twilight zone was so much cooler than this new shitty one.)

I was going to bed one late night, it was dark outside and so I had decided 'twas probably for the best (dun dun dun). I walked into my bedroom - a rather small one, with room for a desk, a bed and a place to stand whilst deciding whether to sit at the desk or the bed - and I close the door behind me (slam [that's a door closing, btw]). I checked everything I needed for the morning, predicting the early morning half-blind fumble for my clothes. On the floor were some books and my radio alarm clock. I turned off the light (click [lightswitch; imagine the moon casting a single source of light from the window opposite the bedroom door, creating the iconic greyscale effect of a single lightsource illuminating from one length of the room to the other, with my pillow by the window]). I lay on my bed, pulled the sheet over me and started clearing my mind.

That was when it happened, the room suddenly seemed to get somewhat brighter and my body froze - I just couldn't move and I didn't know why, my breathing was regular, my eyes were open, but I was frozen. Then the door opened, everything from the opening of the door was present, the sound of the old hinges, the slight moonlight illumination coming from my window onto the landing outside my room - all the shadows were correct, all that was on the landing was there in this image before me. However, something was there that wasn't before, in the middle of all this - framed by the comparative blackness of the background - stood a figure. He must have been a tall man, dressed in what looked like a dark brown trench coat or dressing gown, but with a hood.
He stepped towards me, stepping over the books and radio; I could move my eyes so as to look up and down him, to see his shadow, but I just couldn't move my head or my arms. He proceeded to move over to me and stood leant over me. He then produced a knife, about 6 inches long, and without hesitation thrust it right where my heart would be - and nothing changed from before; my breathing remained the same, my body seemed no longer to be bound and I just lay there doubting what I had just seen. As I started to drift off to sleep I thought to myself that, wow, that was pretty cool and fell asleep.

Although I wasn't scared at the time and was only a little confused immediately after, the feeling of being petrified, totally unable to respond and the fear of what I may see next time means that now whenever I'm in bed, feeling like I'm about to drift off and my limbs start to become even the tiniest bit unresponsive the first thing I do is close my eyes and don't open them for anything.
I consider it some kind of hallucination, maybe due to just being over-tired or possibly even dreaming before I fell asleep if that's even possible, but it was still bloody freaky.


Oh, one time I closed my eyes and I could still see my hands in front of the blackness, when I opened my eyes my hands were in the exact position as I saw them when my eyes were closed - that was also pretty cool.
(Frozen_Banana Shaved against the grain; thoroughly unrewarding., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 16:06, 9 replies)

Spooky Chameleon Guinea Pigs
I had a lovely little ginger guinea pig when i was a child. I forget it's name but i loved that animal.
I went on camp for a week and when i came back it had changed colour! Now i had a lovely white guinea pig. My parents swore blind that it had just changed colour while i was away. Spooky.


(I actually believed this till i was about 20 and it occured to me that it had died and my parents just bought a new one. D'oh)
(The Ginger Penguin la la la la la la, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 15:57, Reply)

During one summer holiday...
..I was sent to stay with my Uncle Ernie, a retired Catholic priest.
Uncle Ernie, despite his vows of celibacy was a man who loved all children and always had a bag of sweets for any passing small boy.

The summers would pass by so quickly as we spent days on end in Uncle Ernie's 'special secret places'. The only bad memory I have of Uncle Ernie's house was the fact that he lived in a very old house, which was haunted.
Every night I'd be woken from my sleep by the sound of heavy breathing and what I thought was a quiet, low groan.

I think in retrospect that the groans around the house were actually quite loud, as Uncle Ernie would always be in my room, red faced and sweaty from running from his bedroom to mine, to help me wipe up the ectoplasm which the ghost would inevitably leave my sleeping face covered with.

Shortly after this holiday Uncle Ernie went to Africa to do missionary work and I never saw him again. I think him and my dad must have disagreed about him going there as he was never spoken of again.

I miss Uncle Ernie, haunted house and everything.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 15:19, Reply)

Still gives me goose bumps even now
When I was about 5 or 6 I shared a bedroom with my brother, who's a couple of years older than me. We had beds that you could get underneath, rather than divan-type, so when I was woken up by being bounced up and down rather violently it was as if someone was under my bed kicking the springs really hard. I assumed it was my brother so I asked him to stop. I then looked across to his bed and there he was in his bed, asking sleepily what I was on about. And there was me still bouncing up and down. It freaked me out something rotten and I went to my parents' room to see if I could sleep with them (they declined). I know it was real, definitely didn't dream it but I have no explanation at all.
( shrinking man Been away a while, time I ventured back, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 14:44, Reply)

Wardrobe Malfunction
Way back in the mists of time, when I were but a youngster, the years were longer and the cost of fuel was approximately a quarter of what it is now, the family took possession of my gran's old wardrobe.

This was a solid piece of work - none of your painted chipboard shite. No, this was a solid mahogany job, with three doors, a full length mirror on the middle door and a couple of hefty drawers in the bottom for good measure. Whilst it was awaiting transportation into mum's bedroom, it stood imposingly in the hallway, at the foot of the stairs. Until one day...

As I was heading off upstairs (I can't remember why), I heard a creak and as I looked behind me, saw the wardrobe toppling towards me. I flung my arms out in order to try and stop it crashing down on me, but it was no good. The thing was far too heavy and it forced me down onto the staircase and pinned me there.

My mum heard the noise and yelled "what the hell is going on out there?"

To which my slightly muffled response was "The wardrobe's fallen on top of me".

To this day I can't explain how a large, heavy item of wooden furniture, that was sited on a perfectly level floor, could just topple on top of a nine year old child for no readily apparent reason. But it did...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 13:43, 5 replies)

now this is spooky
about two weeks ago I got the toast to pop and the jug to boil AT THE SAME TIME!



oooooOOOhhhh
(dawa, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 13:17, 1 reply)

My dad
Many years ago, my dad's mum had to have a heart valve op. Whilst on the operating table (approx 13:30) she arrested and had to be resucitited; it was succesful and she lived a long and (not particularly) happy life.

At the same time my father was at work, in a meeting. Suddenly, he describes it as "locking up" and he couldnt mmove, speak etc. It lasted about 30 seconds and he then went back to normal. The time...13:30.

Hes never had anything like this before or after.
(kitescreech still here, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 12:14, Reply)

Anne Robinson - Queen of the Undead
I used to work on a quiz show involving links that are weak. Arriving in the early hours of the morning and leaving in the darkness of night, Anne Robinson never sees daylight. At the time she had banned the gallery staff from eating garlic (yes, really). Despite being over one hundred years old (allegedly) she looks younger and younger with every series.

There is only one scientific explanation for this, no matter how fantastic or unbelievable...

... Vannepire.
(Error 404 - Username Unknown, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 11:59, 1 reply)

You Want To Be Scared?
.
You can't handle being scared...

This

Sleep well.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 11:58, 4 replies)

hardon
I remember everytime driving home on the bus when I was about 18, when I came to a certain place on the road I used to get a hardon randomly for no real apparent reason. All the time at the exact same spot then I used to try and hide it when my stop came. Unexplainable and embarrassing.
(conzo21, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 11:50, 4 replies)

school bus dreams
When I was in year 11 I used to live one town over from the local highschool and had to catch the bus in and out of town every day. One night before school I had dreamt that on the way to school the bus driver pulled the bus off the road in between the two towns and made everyone get out. He then drove a little bit ahead of us and waited for us to catch up. Once we had, he would drive off a short distance again, over and over again, like that game dads like to play to piss off their kids.

I told a friend the next morning at the bus stop and she laughed and said "Wouldn't it be funny if that dream was trying to tell you that the bus was going to break down this morning?"

Ten minutes later we were mid way between the two towns, the snowy river on the left and dairy farms on the right when the bus driver had to pull the bus over. Sure enough, the night of my dream someone had siphoned petrol out of the bus' tank and had caused us to break down. Only true dream I've ever had, but once is enough. I'm just glad I told my friend about it before it happened or no one would have believed
(dawa, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 11:43, Reply)

job interview
glad we've moved on from the last week's topic. maybe, almost supernaturally some might say, i will get this job.

edit: bugger.
(ladyintheradiator, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 11:08, Reply)

Black cats
When I was an eleven year old we had a ginger cat called Sandy that loved me almost as much as I loved him. He used to sleep in the crook of my knees, let me wear him like a collar, carry him around over my arm, dress him up etc.

The family had just returned from a week away and the cattery man turned up with a basket and was on his knees undoing the straps when I said - "That is not Sandy, there is a black cat in there, I can smell it." Actually, there was a very strong smell, just like chimney soot. The man gave me a very strange look, loosened the last strap and opened the lid. All we saw of the cat was a black ball of fluff exiting the room. We heard footsteps going upstairs, in and out of all three bedrooms, coming back down stairs and the cat returned to the basket.

Afterwards the man said he had wondered why a black cat was called Sandy.
.
(whiskas loved by 8 out of 10 cats, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 10:52, Reply)

Youfo
Walking home one night a few years back a mate and i saw a UFO,as in i don't know what the hell it was.Imagine three bars of light,slightly seperated,the top and bottom ones blue and the same length, the middle orange and longer.It kind of reminded me of the back of the millenium falcon and it moved across the sky alot faster than commercial aircraft or a helicopter.I'm an open minded chap,so if it was spacealiens that's ace,but if someone can offer a rational explanation i'd be equally happy.
(yob soddoth happiness is a Dane called Hamlet?, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 10:43, Reply)

Old Bins
Anyone who trained or worked in the old Psychiatric Hospitals ("bins") will probably have heard of this phenomenom. Not really Spooky but...
The Bins were BIG places with all sorts of wards, from short stay acute to long term EMI (Dementia) wards. Every bin had a few Long Term patients; theyd been admitted 50+ years ago and would die in the place. They were part of the furniture, and pretty much had a licence to wander anywhere they wanted too. Quite often they wouuld go to the EMI wards and if someone was "on the way out", would predict with remarkable accuracy when they would die. One old guy I knew would have a sniff of the air around the patient and saY "3 Hours" (or similar) and sure enough, 3 hours later theyd be gone.

Also, anyone read Bill Bryson's book about England (forget title) where he talks about the guy in the Bin who kept asking if it was 1983? Same thing I reckon.
(kitescreech still here, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 10:18, 1 reply)

Poltergeist just 'annoying'
We have a poltergeist in our house, and all it does is make the pictures and mirrors hanging on the wall a bit wonky - I have to straighten them about once a week. It may also be responsible for putting the clock on the video out of sync with the one on the microwave but I'm waiting to hear back from the Vatican on that one. Luckily my CD collection mysteriously sorting itself into alphabetical order rather than by genre turned out to be my anally-retentive missus though.
(se8card, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 7:28, Reply)