b3ta.com talk
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Talk » Message 6176757

Good ning!
I'm building up a keyword list for a spam filter, suggestions please

Also, this has to cover an office in london and another in moscow so if anyone knows the russian for "XXX Hot chicks free viagra" please let me know
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:42, archived)
That's not a good idea
the best thing to do is train your mail client to recognise spam. What are you using?
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:43, archived)
this is a server side thing for a whole bunch of people
they've got exchange with sophos av/as gubbins
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:49, archived)
Definitely not a good idea then
You don't want to accidentally word filter a legitimate email.
Spam should be determined by other factors that I don't quite understand.
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:07, archived)
SPAMMY IPs

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:10, archived)
Well not just that
There's lots of other gubbins to be aware of.
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:17, archived)
blimey you've 'ad some cowboys in 'ere mate
wot you needs is them there regular expressions, rip out all that string matching crap AND I'll tarmac yer drive for yer
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:07, archived)
tell me about it
we're mostly unix folks, this is the only exchange we look after, I fucking hate it
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:13, archived)
so ... you run Unix and you chose ... the shittest server system Microsoft ever produced?
what does your website run on, a ZX81?
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:18, archived)
we didn't choose this
basically the client came along and said "we want a fileserver" and we said ok and then while building that they said "oh by the way can you build and manage an exchange server for us?" and we said "we don't really do that sort of thing" and the client waved a huge wad of cash our direction and the manager said "oh actually we do do that after all, it's dead easy"

and here we are


/edit and with reference to my own personal website


www.zxbadger.com
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:21, archived)
bum gravy

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:52, archived)
*plays pong online*
|              |
|              |
|    X         |
|              |
|              |

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 10:22, archived)
*bip*
               |
|              |
|              |
|   X          |
|              |
|


*boop*
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:24, archived)

| |
| |
| |
| |
| X |

...doink
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:47, archived)

...I think I've broken it
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:48, archived)
nonce
hitler, willies, botulism, leprosy, gingers, connect 4
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:43, archived)
that sounds like my standard emails

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:44, archived)
Gingers?
:( You're a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:47, archived)
tits goes in too
gingers are as good as tits.

*glass half full*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:48, archived)
You tell 'im
(I likes redheads)
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:49, archived)
gingers who shave their mimsys but leave a landing strip look like they have stuck a fish finger on their cunts

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
pfft

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:54, archived)
Ha ha ha ha

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)
Is this another plot to a sitcom?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 10:01, archived)
Birds of a Feather

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:10, archived)
almost perfect weekend
all you needed was 'oversized' in front of connect4
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:07, archived)
oversized
jenga/connect4/monopoly/risk etc.

Hello sire! How goes the world?
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:10, archived)
pretty smash, I will give more details on the old fblox in about 20 minutes...
how're you?
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:12, archived)
Grandiose!
Just pootling away on work-related malarkies
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:17, archived)
I'm going to glastonbury
who's jealous?
www.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk/news/2009-line-up-revealed
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:44, archived)
A bit.
I used to go every year but I opt for smaller festivals now. Latitude for the last couple of years and End of The Road this year.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:46, archived)
I'd like to go to latitude next year
it seems to be getting better each year.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:48, archived)
Latitude is really lovely.
Nice surroundings, good camping areas, high quality food, small enough that if you lose someone it isn't the end of the world!

End of The Road is even smaller only 5000 people but has an amazing lineup if you like folky/acoustic music.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:50, archived)
i might be doing both of those this year
latitude is a definite, end of the road will depend on monies
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:05, archived)
Not me
I'm saving my money for Amsterdam and shoes, glorious shoes.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:48, archived)
stop being so jealous of me Wow

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:50, archived)
I'd go for Scroob
I've not heard of most of the line-up.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:51, archived)
Rolf Harris

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
Stop calling me that.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
Stop touching sick animals innappropriatly then.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:54, archived)
*puts Huntley down*

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:54, archived)
...Ian?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 9:58, archived)
Is there another?

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:59, archived)
I'm sure there's many.
I'm still not intune with your sick mind. You could have meant something completely innocent for all I know.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 10:00, archived)
'Stop touching sick animals innappropriatly then.'
*puts Huntley down*

I'm hardly being obscure, Crumpet.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:03, archived)
Sorry.
My brain has melted.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 10:05, archived)
Awwww.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:05, archived)
melted brain on crumpets
deeeelicious
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:11, archived)
I saw him there in either 02 or 03, I can't remember.
He rocked it! He really was good.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
What-ho young Captain of the Captain-Captainsons
How does this morning find you?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
Impatient, I have post due to arrive today.
LUSH post.

You?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
Exciting, what is in this post?

(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:55, archived)
perfume, bath bombs, skin stuff, shampoo, conditioner....

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:55, archived)
I once made a bath bomb
It went smashingly
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:47, archived)
Someone stole my parking space again *snarls*
Other than that pretty good but the 'rents finally sold the house so I'm currently looking for somewhere to live.

Is that parcel you were supposed to get yesterday?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:56, archived)
Yep.
I hope you find somewhere, dude.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)
I'm going to look at a smashing little cottage in the middle of nowhere on Friday
It suits my reclusiveness perfectly media.rightmove.co.uk/33k/32471/32471_9387_IMG_00_0000.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:58, archived)
Ooooooooh lovely

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:59, archived)
I've also got a few other things to look at
But that one looks ideal, if I can get broadband through the phone line and the farm next door isn't too noisy or smelly.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:01, archived)
Nicely, sir.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:02, archived)
Trying to arrange viewings is the hard part
Question 1) Do you work? - "Yes"
Question 2) Can you make it to the house in the day? - "No I'll be at work, can I see it on an evening or weekend?"
Sorry, we don't do evening or weekend viewings
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:03, archived)
'So how do gainfully employed people view properties through yourselves?'

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:05, archived)
I did ask something similar to one of the agents,
they couldn't give two shits was the general impression I got.

Maybe I should have tried less sounding like a posh southerner and more like an irate inbred local. "Ay'up me duck, I don't want to poll thompson but I'd like to take a gander at the house by the jitty. My eadscrag is tup-ead so I have to go in the evening..."
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:08, archived)
That is very true.
Although I do work in estate agency (please, no abuse) we will accompany viewings until 7pm weekdays and all day both Saturday and Sunday.

At the moment if someone wants to view something, most estate agents can't afford not to show them around.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:26, archived)
That's what I'd have thought
Most of the decent lettings around here are through independant landlords or small estate agents though.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:29, archived)
how much am I?

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:13, archived)
Priceless.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:22, archived)
only for Bon Iver.
and maybe Mr. Hudson.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:48, archived)
oh Bon Iver <3

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:51, archived)
I cannot think of anything I would rather do less than go to Glastonbury
All those crusty fuckers.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:50, archived)
Row after row of ginger dreadlocks, drenched in mud and vom.
Not taking a shit for three days becuase the facilities rival those of Delhi's smelliest shithouse.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:51, archived)
Waking up shivering, hungover in the wrong tent and finding all your posessions stolen.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:51, archived)
That is why I go to smaller less mental festivals these days.
Decent toilets and less crusties.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
you've been terribly unlucky to experience all these things firsthand
without even going
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
This is my idea of torture.
People don't realise how shit Glastonbury is becuase we are constantly told how fucking brilliant it is.

The only people that can afford to go are grungy champagne socialists that only wear clothes made of hemp grown in Palestine.

The whole thing makes me want to start a far-right youth movement.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
you're so wrong,
you couldn't get more upper middle class than the majority of people who go there.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:55, archived)
haha fail
www.b3ta.com/talk/6176802
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:56, archived)
I reserve the right to call you wrong
without claiming to be alternative or cool.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)
You're going to stand at the back with some cunt-faced media types talking about how Festivals have gone down hill
whilst reading your signed copy of Rob-da-bank's festival guide 2009 as featured in Time Out.

you floppycocked pillock.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:58, archived)
Nope I'm going to get hammered in a field with my friends
and listen to live music,

it'll be awful.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:00, archived)
This is the bit where lots of people that think they are alternative and cooler than me tell me off for being wrong on the internet.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:55, archived)
you should form a band with the unrelistic hope of fame, but not really be very good but still talk about your band all the time
then you'll understand glastonbury
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:00, archived)
I thought everyone that went looked like you.
Saville Row tucked into wellies.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
I'll tell you the kind of people that go to Glastonbury
TFD.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)
and me

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:58, archived)
But I like both of you.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:58, archived)
obviously you shouldn't

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:06, archived)
I've never been particularly fashionable.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:09, archived)
you're fashionably particular though

(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:18, archived)
Oh well DONE, Nibes :D

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:22, archived)
you'd love it,
it's generally full of very attractive women, mostly london types with names like Sasha and Meegan.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
I went once.
I really didn't enjoy it very much at all, it must be said. This could be to do with the people I went with though.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:59, archived)
i am
for me glastonbury isn't so much about the lineup, but that does look pretty ace

if i can scrape the sponds i want to do some sort of festival, it's a shame glastonbury was off the cards this year
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:51, archived)
don't waste your time
the Glastonbury ethos was ruined years ago when they built the second fence and actually started enforcing security. It's just another mass-market festival now, there is none of the old atmosphere.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:26, archived)
as mass-market festivals go it still works well, in my opinion
i'm not asking anyone else to enjoy it, but it's fun for me
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Wed 27 May 2009, 12:04, archived)
there's some good stuff in the lineup but i'm not terribly interested in going to glasto
too many people and too high a chance of rain-soaked misery
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
East 17?
Really?

I'd quite like to see Jarvis and White Lies. And Spinal Tap. That's about it though.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:52, archived)
I'm almost tempted to see them...

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:56, archived)
DO SO
I shall live vicariously through you.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)
Not me,
glastonbury is one of the shittest festivals around
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 9:54, archived)
Gong, Eat Static *and* Back to the Planet
bring your own soap
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:55, archived)
Jesus.
Back to The Planet? That's a blast from the past RIGHT THERE.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:59, archived)
Fuck, yes.
I saw them in Camden Palace in the early nineties. Very fit lead singer. Some drunks were singing "get your tits out" at her. Cue the giant, fat, bearded, hairy bassist shouting "I'm not getting my fucking tits out for any cunt"

good times. Bad cider.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:28, archived)
having been at all the really good Glastonburys in the last 15 years or so
I can safely say "Not me, I couldn't give two short cocks"
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:23, archived)
He he.
Hello you. How's things on Planet TMB?
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:25, archived)
hello miss
things are OK. Bit hectic. and I took a ball to the inside of the elbow last night and I'm currently torn between "man the fuck up and take the pain" and "Go to hospital you fucking prick, if you can't move it there's a chance it's broken"

Good times. How's you?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:31, archived)
Youch.
I say 'Man The Fuck Up And Go To The Hospital. You Prick'.

I'm alright ta. Bit sleepy, so even less awake than usual today. More time will be spent day dreaming than EVER BEFORE.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:35, archived)
bum gravy

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:44, archived)
Vampire
Monkey
Speed
Tits
Boobs
Flange
Germany.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 9:53, archived)
emails containing the words
Nigeria
sum of
million $USD
plane crash
oil
Western union
(I helped save b3ta! morrybyte made a subtle namechange at, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:54, archived)
that's a bit of a problem as they're a financial company
and they have a rep in nigeria
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 27 May 2009, 10:04, archived)
"drugs," "affair," "the boss is a cunt," "shit on his desk"
that way, as sysadmin you get first dibs on the gossip
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Wed 27 May 2009, 9:57, archived)