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ME!
What's the JMG gossip machine thinking up, today?
I've been OUT and ABOUT.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:14, archived)
Signing on doesn't count as being out and about

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:14, archived)
Hold on, internet.
I've just signed on NOW, today?!
This is a thrilling new chapter, and indeed plot twist.

What have I been doing these past years?
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
You have to sign on every week
But you already knew that, having signed on for the last 3 years
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
it's every two weeks
but then all the dole scum must look the same two you as you cruise past in your Mercades, on your way to the head office to buy orange juice shares
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Tripps is your taxloss lover from Liverpool, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)
It is? They are?
I shall have to get my butler to point out when they are different.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
I'll be honest. I don't know dole. But you're much more in tune with it.
I therefore think you're a paedophile.
THAT'S internet logic!
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)
You're playing the system Abu Almajibab Geordie

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
I remember the week I told everybody I was semi-Muslim.
It wasn't as fun as the week I pretended to be a female on /board, but we can all probably guess how both weeks went.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)
I was huffing so much it was impossible to eat my morning bran flakes

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
Are bran flakes better than all bran?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
Jammy
how're preparations for my visit to Newcastle going?
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:15, archived)
I've shot three fat people.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
Are you sure it wasn't just one really fat person?

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
I'd hate to see some of these people merge.
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)
good job!
I hope all the sexy ladies are getting into lines of sexy
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
I'm out with girls from the SOUTH this weekend, GMoS.
I think I might wear a singlet.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)
good luck brave soldier
this weekend I will be chasing tail.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
You've only been mentioned once today JMG
you're loosing the wobble vote. What are you going to do to counter this? I think you should repost the same thing as you do everyday but 3x more.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:15, archived)
I do not wish to be the subject of the fatty.
I'd say this is BETTER news, DG.
*JMG Anthem*
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
*long flag trumpets*
Would you like more women to lust and talk about you JMG? You'll have to fight me for the 'prettiest girl on b3ta crown'. They're all lesbians so you'll need to go down that route...
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)
I think it's common knowledge the most femanine b3tan is Moohalaa.
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
I kick myself in the dickbag solidly for 1 week of each month so I have a man-period and feel and connect with their grumpy, hormonal nonsense ways

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)
I have been womaning.
I have clean and tidied my house. And now I'm making tea for me and my girls.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
*Standing ovation*

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
I need to wash my hair.

(I helped save b3ta! B.T., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
Oh JMG it's been awful.
Apparently I've been repressing my homosexuality so hard that I haven't any friends.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
really?
I thought it was because you're a twat.

I don't actually think you're a twat, it just seemed the b3tan thing to say.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
OH MY SWEET RETURNING WORMULUS!
As a man who the internet decided calls Moohalaa for phonesex on the phone for sex, I kind of understand where you are on this.
Have you managed to upset the incredibly serious on the internet?
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)
hold on, i can't work out who is actually upset,
you're the only one i ever see going on about people being upset online. you and friz. can someone explain?
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)
JMG is pro-Ahmadinejad >:(

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:17, archived)
I know someone who is the spitting image of Ahmedinejad

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
I'm going to belt you with my placard.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)

lapicard

BALD!
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)
you broke up NKOTB in 1994

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)
Well it's about time you were out
not so sure it's wise to be about though.
(I helped save b3ta! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)
I believe JMG has just been sent off for USA

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)
CAN THEY NOT HOLD IT TOGETHER FOR ONE GAME?!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
I heard that you were actually a super computer from the future
sent to mock the obese human race until it commits mass suicide by over eating.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
Hello JMG!

(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
I have today received my GOLD subscription
I am officially LIVE.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
Do they send you gold every month?

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)
you turned Mother Glossip's cows milk sour
and ruined my harvest
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Tripps is your taxloss lover from Liverpool, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
it's been very hostile here today jammers
mainly this morning

no need though, we need a more civilised internet
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
I'm getting internet... and an xbox
all i need is a game that I don't think is queer, that you and the boy handsome like and then THE WORLD, MOTHERFUCKER!

lol... mother... dole and other things of that nature
(likeajackhammer, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)
you're near scotland jmg, pop up there and beat up my boss please

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:32, archived)