Who is b3ta's most easily wound up user?
There should be an awards show. Which I would decide and host, obviously.

Ugliest user.
Fattest user.
Most serious user.
etc.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)

I'll try out for Shortest

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:51, archived)

Somebody told me Wormulus was incredibly short but I didn't buy it.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

no, he's of regular height.

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

He's quite short I thought.

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

He's not a great deal taller than me,
but I didn't measure the difference or anything.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

this is coming from me, I suppose.
What is "regular height" for men? There's a good range of heights on this board.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

5 9 - 5 10 is the average

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

I am the average height
5 9
( WormuIus, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

for a smurf

(likeajackhammer, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

depending on age range and nationality.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

I obviously meant Bolivian females

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

I'm 6 2, so most people seem short.

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

Giant freak!

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

:(

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

Don't worry, I'm 6'6"
so it will be the same margin between me and you, as you and a normal person
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

*pats on head*

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)

Wormulus is about 5ft 9 1/2. The half matters because I'm 5ft 10" without shoes, and I like the aerial view I get of his side parting

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

You'd both be a bit short in my world.
You should get your heels on. Or platforms!!
PLATFORMS!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

Me cowboy boots make me 6ft. But to be honest I wouldn't want to tower over you due to the baldness might shine in my eyes :(

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

Don't worry Pipsqueak. I'm 6ft barefoot.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

I'm 6ft 3.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

+in high heels

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

It's all that Tyne water, it deforms you. I think your arms are 2ft long
JMG-Rex
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

Tyranydoleus or something along those lines when the girls are looking.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

me too Jammy, me too.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

SEPERATED AT SOME KIND OF BIRTH LASTING OVER A PERIOD OF 3 YEARS.
*Firm handshakes*
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

*fist bump and nods*
crikey that was a miskey and a bit!
( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Us southern softies are stunted from all the mincing

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

speak for yourself!
i'm more southern than you, shorty
( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

How southern?

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

portsmouth
pretty southern
( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:12, archived)

I'm going to create a 'Lank Corner' at the CHB bash were all the cloud lickers and hangout.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

lawks!

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

i'm 6ft 3in of pure sex

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

*height five*

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

we're fine until trev gets here

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

I bet you're both all lanky and your arms flail around like rodeo lassos

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

i'm built like a shit brickhouse

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

wait...

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

Your head is made from corrugated iron

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

I'm getting a bit porky, it has to be said.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

i'm 5'7
:(
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

Spango is about 4ft 1" I think with 48" heels

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

< 4ft 10" is technically a dwarf
AWESOME!
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

it's true

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

*spinny spinny spinny*

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

no point
with your legs, you would never be able to climb the stairs leading upto the stage.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

Some ropes and crampons, I'll be fine

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

i think you should be air lifted in

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

by a pigeon

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

We can get the Doozers to build a rollercoaster up to the stage

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

I think I win the prize of the most "good looking spelltard"

( G/PP &#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

I will take 'Looks Best in a Dress' & 'Worst Legs'

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

I'm gonna nominate myself for ugliest and fattest

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

Aww, don't get down on yourself fatso.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

haha :P

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

Mykey
Mykey
Mykey
Mykey
etc.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

It's a good job we're all on block etc.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

El Guiri for biggest retard.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

For no reason whatsoever he started a new thread about how horrible I was
I had literally never seen their username until this happened.

I'm like JMG lite.
( WormuIus, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Don't you mean
@El Guiri
for biggest retard
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

i'm only small

(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

I think I'll just enter myself into the "Best B3ta User" category.
Your vote will mean a lot, thanks everyone.
( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

Vote, dammit.

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)

*holds jobe banner aloft*

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

Thanks, thanks for your support.

( Jobe, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)

I_Was_Mordred

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

Christ, they're shit.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

could there be one for the most tedious
you could host and recieve the award at the same time.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

8888888888P 8888888 888b    888  .d8888b.  8888888888 8888888b.  888 888 
      d88P    888   8888b   888 d88P  Y88b 888        888   Y88b 888 888 
     d88P     888   88888b  888 888    888 888        888    888 888 888 
    d88P      888   888Y88b 888 888        8888888    888   d88P 888 888 
   d88P       888   888 Y88b888 888  88888 888        8888888P"  888 888 
  d88P        888   888  Y88888 888    888 888        888 T88b   Y8P Y8P 
 d88P         888   888   Y8888 Y88b  d88P 888        888  T88b   "   "  
d8888888888 8888888 888    Y888  "Y8888P88 8888888888 888   T88b 888 888 

( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

LADIES! SET YOUR GROINS TO DAMP!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

Clickin dees

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

no offence but i think i'd win most normal looking person
ugliest: cr3
fattest: friz
most serious: master of turnips
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

Oh dear.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

i think you'd win
'least thought put into an answer'
( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

You're 5'7 you disgusting short freak,
you must be missing your shins to be that small.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

:(

(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

You've got a massive spam and look a bit fruity.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

mean!
cr3 is a lovely.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

I think you could be 'best at making value judgements about people based on their internet posting habits'

( WormuIus, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

best beard = me

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)

joly shit dude
you just jumped into the ugly category with that profile pic xD

but i bet your are lovely on the inside. and stuff. if loves skin deep, you have loads.
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

shut it, halfpint

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

:(

(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

you asked for it, shimpy

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

OH THE COMPETITION!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

I cannot begin to imagine what prize I would win

( SuperMatt, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

the gary glitter award

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

For services to music?

( SuperMatt, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

making young girls scream

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

You could set an award for best background noiser.
But there won't be a winner because otherwise that'll create a paradox.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

You're my 'most underrated b3tan'

( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

D'aaaw, cheers!
And you are "the best b3tan with Red Rocket as a username".
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

*cherishes subbuteo sized trophy*

( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

he's my pick for
'worst jokes since malchick stopped posting as much'
( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

Some are absolute gems though.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)

Suggestions for Most Improved b3tan?
Most underrated b3tan?
The "I can't see why everyone likes them" award?
( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

"Worst use of apostrophe" award?
Most pedantic B3tan?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

No idea.
You.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

I doubt it'd be me.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

gmos for most fancied

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

I'd bum him and I'm basically straight.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

What's that martial art you do again?
Kendo? I'm thinking of putting it on my List of Awesome Things to Take Up At Some Point.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

yes I do kendo.
There are some excellent dojos up your way too.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

Kung Fu and Archery are on the list first, though.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

I'm tempted by Archery
Kung fu will fuck up your kendo stance ;)
( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

Oh,
multi-stancing not an option?
I've also got Italian and dressmaking pencilled in. Well, not literally. Err, mentalled in.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

GMoS FOR MOST AWESOME GMoS!
THIRD YEAR RUNNING!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Grumpiest Redhead in a Leading Role.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

I'd win 'b3tan most often accused of being a Jew without actually being a Jew'

( Theoban What of it, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

jew

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

You get accused of being a Jew?

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

YOU JEW

( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

No Foreskin!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

fuck off jewbag

(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

SEE

( Theoban What of it, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

Most internet women defiled.
Another clash of the TITans between Wormulus and Sexface.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

The award for "Spending most amount of time with 90nz0 in his pants" award is a real two horse race this year.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)

Sexface actually wins that over gonzo
:(
( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

:(!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 29 Jun 2009, 16:13, archived)