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I have an eye test this afternoon.
Does anybody here know any of the answers?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:27, archived)
Remember to lick the opticians face when they get in close to check out the backs of your eye balls.

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:29, archived)
Glasses go on the front of the eyeballs, Mykey.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
Is this your first visit to the opticians?

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)
No, I'm in an internet café.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
If it's your first time at the opticians, you have to fight.

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)
Never hit a man with glasses, Mykey.
You get a better swing off a baseball bat.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)
And if you have a metal bat, and hit them in just the right place, the bat makes a lovely ringing ping.
'Ning, Herr Doktor, orders?
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:59, archived)
It's thing like this that make you no one's favourite b3tan, Dr P.

(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:29, archived)
CRIKEY!
Now what then is his [Marx's] proof of the exploitative character of a clean capitalism? It consists in the observation that the factor prices, and in particular the wages paid to laborers by the capitalists, are lower than the output prices. The laborer, for instance, is paid a wage that represents consumption goods which can be produced in three days, but he actually works five days for his wage, and produces an output of consumption goods that exceeds what he receives as remuneration. The output of the two extra days -- the surplus value in Marxist terminology -- is appropriated by the capitalist. Hence, according to Marx, there is exploitation.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
Move up one rung on the ladder of greatness.

(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
OH NOES!
It's a snake of mediocrity!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
*descends*

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
i wanna be a favourite.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:39, archived)
SOMEONE VALIDATE ME NOW PLEASE.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:39, archived)
You are my favourite person in this subthread

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:40, archived)
yay :D

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:41, archived)
*eyes nervously in case someone elses posts here*

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:41, archived)
Who's your favourite?

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:52, archived)
i have a number of favourites.
you are amongst them.

you are HIGHER amongst them when you are nice to me, or funny.

GO ROCKET.
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:53, archived)
Not good enough, sorry
*humphs*
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:02, archived)
FINE BY ME.
*goes to cut self in darkened room with extra running mascara*
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:10, archived)
I just want to be TOP

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:13, archived)
I TOLD YOU HOW TO EARN IT.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)
FINE. SO I HAVE TO 'EARN' IT NOW?
*scribbles out 'sleepybinky' from top of my list*

NO NO, IT'S FINE.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:17, archived)
oh thank gawd
i thought i might have accidentally dropped you in that thread down there

i can't go through life as the man who killed binky!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:45, archived)
haha no i had to leave my desk urgently to retrieve cake.
IT'S ALL OK.

*licks beard*
a good week?
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:52, archived)
how good can a bink-free week be?
I WANT TO BE HIGHER UP THE LIST THAN RR

no, it was pretty good thanks. i trust you had a most excellent time?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)
it was sweet. i had a lot of wine and some smokes, saw some music, sat in the sun, sat in the shade, ate tasty food, passed out in a tent, and played in mud.
WHAT MORE COULD A BINKY WANT?
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:15, archived)
wheeee!
i'm looking forward to my festival funtimes immensely

16 days to go!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:26, archived) 


       A
   D   H   D
 T   W   A   T
F U C K - S O C K S
WANKYBOOLOCKSHITITS
  MADE   IN    ENGLAND
    YOUFUCKINGBLINDBASTARD
       IBETYOUTRYTOSEEWHATTHISSAYSTOO

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:29, archived)
OPTASTIC!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)
It's pie shaped!

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)
it is?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:44, archived)
In the sense that one can make a pie in any shape one chooses.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)
dude, far out

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
In fact everything is pie shaped, except King Zog II of Albania and Paul Ince.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:47, archived)
they're pie shaped twice

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)
Pie. Yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
E, F, P, T, O, Z, L, P, E, D, P, E, C, F, D, E, D, F, C, Z, P

(I helped save b3ta! L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:30, archived)
Down
Up
Left
Left
A
Right
Down
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
mortal kombat, innit?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
Fatalities are frowned upon in Specsavers.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
Liu Kang wins...
OPTOMETRY
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
lmao

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
one on the left and another on the right

(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
Careful they don't trick you and give you the cryptic one as opposed to the quick eye test.
That really confused me.
A typical lunchtime request? (5) - I 1 M N X
(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
A pint.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
what's the I1MNX bit about?

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)
it means you like one in the front and two in the back

(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)
I want ham and eggs

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
wow, i haven't seen any of those for aaaaages
I8AB4T
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)
FUNEX?
SVFX.
FUNEM?
9.
IFCDM.
VFN10EM.
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:40, archived)
exactly

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:49, archived)
just remember to show you're working

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
Then the dole won't pay for my glasses.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
tippex in the holes

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
*newspaper cartoon titter*

(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
CAN DULL
happy day
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)
Thanking you good sir.
*tips hat*
(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:53, archived) 



         (
         )\
         {_}
        .-;-.
       |'-=-'|
       |happy|
       |b3ta |
       | day |
       |T.G.B|
       '.___.'

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)
YES!
Thank you. I didn't notice this before.
(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:52, archived)
Tell them you can't read.

(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
I can't read this post.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)
'Cancer of the eye'

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
I was just about to wish you a happy day and then you did this to me.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
King Zog II of Albnania
and Paul Ince
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
Name the only two people never to have been married to Ulrika Johnson.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:34, archived)
Is this only important people
I've never been married to Ulrika Johnson
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)
or so you THINK.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
So, I HAVE been married to Ulrikakakakakakaka?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)
everyone has

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)
Except King Zog II of Albnania and Paul Ince.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:41, archived)
they've married her twice

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)
She once gave me a tit wank.
Thing is though, we weren't even in the same room.
That put me right off.
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:53, archived)
That's what you think.
Science has proved that the average person spends on third of their time asleep, completely unaware of what goes on around them. This is more than enough ttime for Ulrika Johnson to creep into your room, marry you, sell her story to Hello claiming it will last forever, get divorced, creep back out of your room and not quite accuse John Leslie of rape.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)
I reckon Incey probably at least gave Collymore's custard a stir up there.
But you're probably right about the not marrying her thing
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
get out of my profile you filthy profile looker-atter you

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
EXCITING
www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/gif/excitement.gif
(__, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
If it's a woman optician complement her choice of perfume
It really works! - She knocked a full dioptre off my left eye prescription!
Result.

I remember doing it because it was about the same time I started to notice that newspapers were starting to lower their print quality, making them harder to read.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)
F E C K
A R S E
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)
O'RACIST!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)
Yes easy peasy
Lens 1, Lens 1, Lens 2, Lens 4, Lens 1
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)
Get a bigger errection the stronger the lense they put in
also, coz it took me so long to type - Previous thread answer. www.b3ta.com/talk/6264711
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)
LISTFAIL!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
I don't even know what you look like! you could look like my mum a bit!
Plus the list is people that have sent me mander gazzes.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:47, archived)
:'(

(__, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)
Go back to being old Friz and you'd be at the top.
None of this memememe stuff anymore, just the funny shit :)
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)
NOTED

(__, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
*saunters about in cool shades*

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:54, archived)
If you were a Power Ranger you'd be the White Ranger, Tommy
I'd be the Yellow Ranger, because she was oriental and I wanted to fuck her in the lycra.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)
*summons falconzord*

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:00, archived)
*gunsword flipout summons embarrassment through spandex Broom-On*

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
oh criminy
i remember that episode

that was when power rangers jumped the shark
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:15, archived)
+zord

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:25, archived)
haha, nice!

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:28, archived)
DO I MEAN NOTHING?

(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:28, archived)
???
You're on there you silly

kneeew I would forget someone important, and a girl too :S
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:34, archived)
In a TFS/Az sandwich!

(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:37, archived)
I read that last bit as Auschwitz
:(
(thediscokingpin, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:43, archived)
Cor! Saucy!

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:43, archived)
bleurg, i'm sandwiched with wormulus

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:50, archived)
Haha :D

Police Dog is by himself. Poor Police Dog :'(
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:53, archived)
Whenever he says "eye"
respond with "aye captain" very quickly.
that'll be hilarious
(PsychoChomp, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:37, archived)