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Home » Messageboard » General election: Other / Spoilt ballot » Message 9997366 (Thread)

[challenge entry]

From the General election: Other / Spoilt ballot challenge. See all 186 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:04, archived)
# I Vote MelonS!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:06, archived)
# TJ
did anyone else watch the Sharon Osbourne Roasting on C4 last night? It made me laugh like hell, but I can't help thinking that TV Entertainment has turned a strange corner
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:09, archived)
# I really can't stand Patrick Kielty
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:20, archived)
# I usually think that
but then he only goes and makes me laugh. His early stand-up was very very good - taking the piss out of the IRA in Northern Ireland before the cease-fire
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:23, archived)
# I laughed at the fact he was going on about pumping her daughter Aimee
but..I just think he's turned into a egomaniac
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:44, archived)
# yes. it was good.
although Keith Lemon was shit.
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:36, archived)
# he always is
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:38, archived)
# but particularly more shit than usual
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 11:10, archived)
# Melons.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:07, archived)
# Yay! *votes* :D
good nings to all.

Thank fuck it's Friday!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:07, archived)
# yay it's Friday!
boo - I have to go to the dentist!
yay - it's just a checkup!
yay - I have a very pretty Indian lady dentist

yays:3,boos:1

yays win!

(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:14, archived)
# Is your appointment at 2.30?
geddit....?


'Nings!
apols for lameness, still in bed with a nice cuppa tea.
(I helped save b3ta! camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:17, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:18, archived)
# why did the pig's tail get out of bed?
cos it was twirly

actually its 11:30 which isn't funny at all.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:19, archived)
# what happens if you mix up your viagra and laxatives?
it makes you crap in bed....

(I helped save b3ta! camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:23, archived)
# but I'm already....
oh - I get it


An old man went to the doctor and asked for some Viagra. The doc asked "Are you sure? You are nearly 80 years old"

"oh yes" said the man, "I've managed to get myself a date tonight with a hot young girl and I don't want to disappoint her"

Not believing a word of it, the doc wrote him out a prescription just to keep him quiet and sent him on his way.

The next day the old man is back at the surgery. The doctor joked "Oh hello - I expect you want something for your back after last night?"

"No" said the man - "It's my elbow - she didn't turn up"
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:26, archived)
# And you get hard stools
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:28, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:41, archived)
[challenge entry]

a vote for germ is a vote for more sick leave
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:43, archived)
# I might or might not vote for this candidate - it's amoeba, nothing definite
Of course, it might lead to industrial action and the boss would virus all.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:47, archived)
# I'd vote germ if he wasn't so cocci.
(Catfish Ma, why can't I draw? "Because you have fins dear", Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:56, archived)
# But he's a strepping young fella
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:58, archived)
# very cultured
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:03, archived)
# And an infectious laugh
And somehow avoided Damian McBride's sneezegate.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:07, archived)
# Only one thing would make it better
ample boobage on the dentist
(TwinkleFuckingToes Has a ingrown toe nail, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:47, archived)
# boo: although it's just a checkup it'll still cost a fortune
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:07, archived)
# Melon ftw.
I'm feeling frankly hard done by, because I spent an hour on this.
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:14, archived)
# It happens to the best and worst of us
Even Beau Beau "As featured on TV" D'Or's offerings yesterday got barely a whisper.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:17, archived)
# you get less response if you satisfy expectations
if you exceed them you get a good response
if you fall far below them you get a huge response

In a survey of 17 women aged 25-45, 83% agreed
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:19, archived)
# That's 14.11 women!!!111!!!!>????!!?!!/
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:50, archived)
# Sandi Toksvig was one of them
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:56, archived)
# Ahhhhh, suddenly everything makes sense
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:57, archived)
# pffft
(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:00, archived)
# a lot of it is timing
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:43, archived)
# I gotta be honest, I didn't really understand it but I was too embarrassed to say... :(
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:51, archived)
# Nae bother
It's Rupert Murdoch tipping the balance of power as he requires it
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:54, archived)
# Ohhhhhhh
That's way to clever for me!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:56, archived)
# What's his policy on post neo-classical endogenous growth?
(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:15, archived)
# MELONS.
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:15, archived)
# oh, so he's a tory?
(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:20, archived)
# He's a bit meloncholic
It might be a melonoma.

(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:15, archived)
# oh no :(


or it could just be the sticky gum from the label
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:16, archived)
# He wanted to run away with his girlfriend and get married
But he cantaloupe.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:18, archived)
# Honey - dew really have to make these puns?
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:21, archived)
# I like to keep it simple
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:24, archived)
# that was a reply to this..
b3ta.com/board/9997383

but it posted it here
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:26, archived)
# haha!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:31, archived)
# superb - made me lol
(I helped save b3ta! camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:24, archived)
# that's no melon
That's a marrow!


Impostor!!!
(I helped save b3ta! camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:18, archived)
# When he was narrow, he attended Harrow with Paul Darrow
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:25, archived)
# indeed
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:29, archived)
# Arf!
Didn't see the subject line I was lolling at Blake's Melon
(I helped save b3ta! Sunburn Go on.... It's character building!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 11:08, archived)
# * VOTES
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:24, archived)
# hahaa!
I'd so much rather vote Melon than any of the other selfish, snouty bastards
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:41, archived)
# But a Vote for Battenberg IS a vote for common sense
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:42, archived)
# fuck
now there's a massive dilemma

I know Battenberg isn't for everyone - but I'd vote for Battenberg *and* Melon

we need the Kemeny-Young method
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:46, archived)
# I had to google the Kemeny-Young system
it actually looks quite sensible..
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:01, archived)
# The original script of "Macbeth" featured a lot of Battenberg cake
ALL. Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
2 WITCH. Battenberg, a lovely cake,
In the caldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing,—
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

(and later)

First Witch
1 When shall we three meet again?
2 In thunder, lightning, or in rain?

Second Witch
3 Let us consult the soothful iPhones,
4 The Met Office says it shall hail great stones.

Third Witch
5 Upon the Tuesday we shall wake,
But please, no more Battenberg cake.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:53, archived)
# ha ha, you are a loon
you know that?
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:01, archived)
# Remember the time Mr. Pot made an insensitive racial remark to Mr. Kettle?
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:04, archived)
# :D
Nod's as good as wink to a blind otter.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:12, archived)
# It's simple, it's honest and Melon has my vote - sweet!
:D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:43, archived)
# *votes Melon*
:)
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:44, archived)
# I can't vote melon because I'm already voting fish :(
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:51, archived)
# aren't fish's policies a bit watered-down?
I find melon's policies to be more rounded - and greener
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:54, archived)
# Policies schmolicies
It's personality that counts, and fish have it by the bucketload.
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:56, archived)
# Especially those pesky John Dorys.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:07, archived)
# Hurrah!
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:02, archived)
# I like this almost as much as I like melons
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:04, archived)