(Pazuzudoes a barrel roll, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:07,
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My parents have decided to take up bee-keeping.
They're going to a bee auction in Lincoln on Saturday. For some reason, I'm made very happy by the thought that there exists such a thing as a bee auction.
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:10,
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I have a sudden urge to go to Lincoln now
and inflate the price of bees artificially by raising my hand at inopportune moments.
(thecrapgatsbyisn't listening LALALALALALA, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:13,
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what's the going rate for a healthy bee these days?
(JamTallons, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:17,
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I'll tell you on Sunday.
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:18,
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and do you pay per bee, or per 1000 bees, per hive?
The people must be told!
(DrPrunesqualloris determined to post more as of, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:23,
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In my head, it's per bee.
So the auction takes ages as the auctioneer has to do each individually. What with viewing and so on, it gets very complicated.
In reality, I think they sell them per nucleus - that is, queen and retinue (or whatever you call the non-queens in a hive).
How my folks're going to get them from Lincoln back to Stoke is anyone's guess. And is getting bees like getting a cat, in that you have to keep them indoors for a couple of weeks so they don't run off?
Soooooo many questions.
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:26,
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Maybe you butter their paws
or wings, or something?
(The Empressit seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:28,
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Then you train them to walk across your toast,
thereby saving a fortune on knives.
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:35,
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haha! Dragons Den
now!
(Firkinfeduplast shat on your wife's tits at, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 12:18,
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YES!
Patent this idea now!
1) Buy bees at auction 2) Butter bees 3) ??? 4) PROFIT!
(The Empressit seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 12:46,
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Wasps are where the real money is these days. As everyone knows
bees make honey but wasps make jam.
(herd of chickensFirst part only £1.99 and comes with a free, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:42,
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I recognise this joke from somewhere,
though in the version I heard, I think that wasps made mustard.
But it's annoying me now, because I can't remember where I heard it.
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:51,
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not heard the mustard one, although I am equally annoyed
as I can't remember where I heard the jam one.
(herd of chickensFirst part only £1.99 and comes with a free, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 11:07,
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Ah-ha!
Thank you!
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 11:10,
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Im covered in Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssss
(jakedamusssI understand, and dont care., Thu 31 Mar 2011, 4:14,
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'Time Wasters Letters' book
by Robin Cooper I think - Waspard.
(industrial_bunny, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 11:52,
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Yes.
Not Izzard after all.
Thanks!
(Enzymeis powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 13:38,
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Aha.
My mistake. Izzard was earwigs making chutney/spiders making gravy.
(Wet-chinned bag shankerCannot parse Wogan, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 16:50,
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And wasps making fuck aaaalllll.
(sm.pl.crt.rsI don't fucking know, do I?, Mon 15 Jan 2018, 14:05,
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M'lady recently did a course on beekeeping.
Many of the idyllic dreamers on the course were disappointed to learn that you should have a high fence between your house and the hives if you have pets and children. Because bees have quite a sluggish take-off, apparently they don't like exploring behind large obstacles as it means that, if threatened, they have that much more difficult an escape route.
This is third-hand information. Please don't grill me on it.
(Wet-chinned bag shankerCannot parse Wogan, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:37,
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my parents kept bees
when we were all little. They had them for years in the garden and none of us kids ever got stung. Two weeks after they got rid of them I was stung for the first time ever. I squashed the stripey little git. I was sick of honey.
(SteamedCleaner, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 13:30,
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The neighbours will be delighted
(stopmeandslapmeCometh the hour, cometh your mum, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:43,
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Wasted pun opportunity.
*sigh*
(Tab HunterMake this useless process end and so, begin again, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 11:23,
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I'm covered in beeeeeesssss !!!
(mrmattis staging a 'dirty protest' on, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:11,
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Poor linesman with the yellow shirt
He must look like a pair of tits to those bees
(Extinct Jesus Dossier"...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:24,
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Bee tits like 32 bs?
(tommaturn around an bite you every time, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 12:01,
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I'm sure the ref really appreciated that guy putting a blue sheet over the top of him and trpping all the bees onto his head
(Sheriff John Bunnellhttps://twitter.com/thewonderfulgam, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 10:30,
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