Hmmm
Once told a member of atomic Kitten to 'get fucked' after she bumped into me and refused to apologise... Silly Blonde bint!
(Kayozz, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 10:54, Reply)

Hmmmm
Well, I used to stalk Jamie from Reuben at school (he was a couple of years above me). Bit sad really when you consider he isn't even all that attractive, but he had good dress sense.
( useful_idiot, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 10:54, Reply)

My workmates ex-girlfriend's grandad
invented the 'Topic' chocolate bar.

100% fact.

I imagine that's why they split up - worse than finding out that your girlfriend once had sex with her own brother, really.
( Spunkmeyer, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 10:38, Reply)

Don't know whether to admit this but...
Ummm... I once had a drunken shag with Billie Piper, and worked backstage at a Bon Jovi gig. Not at the same time, mind.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 9:29, Reply)

People that I have worked with. Louise Redknapp, Ant n Dec, Alan Ball, David Essex, Cliff Richard,Roger Black, Kriss Akabusi, etc etc. Probably the most fun though was working with the Chuckle Brothers on a stage show. I couldnt resist doing the "to you, to me, to you, to me" bit when helping them move their props backstage, best thing was when they joined me in saying the crappy catchphrase. The twats.
( Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 9:23, Reply)

organ pleasure
back in the summer of '88 i played the organ at Robert (he of the Cure) Smith's wedding..

not very exciting i agree but the main piece of music they wanted was "Tara's Theme" from "Gone with the wind"

class

(not)
(mr.bouffant, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 9:22, Reply)

My best claim to fame...
I know and see frequently my dad, who was once on Fifteen To One about 20 years ago.
(Bazilla, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 9:17, Reply)

I'm well famous by proxy
My grandparents knew Dave Price (aka Darth Vader), my sister has had hand-me-down baby clothes from Robert Plant's daughter, My mum went to school with one of Bananarama.
I've met Keith from the office at the Plymouth Student Union.

Me and a couple of mates met Franz Ferdinand at an aftershow party before they were big, and my friend Markie P asked where abouts in America they were from, to which the lead singer guy said in a thick scottish accent "Scotland".

I've been on Points West as a 'security guard' on a scout version of Big Brother.
And I've eaten cornflakes in the back of a news report in a hospital at a silly time in the morning.
Oh and once I was almost in the Bristol Observer.
(TheHappyRobot, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 8:40, Reply)

best one
I shagged John Craven's daughter. She was alright, but I was better.

Oh yeah - I was a contributing author for a book about Quicktime Pro and got my name in the credits....but that's not as interesting. Quite crappy, really.
(evilbert has his nob out under the desk., Sat 26 Feb 2005, 6:45, Reply)

my claim to fame
I fucked the olsen twins before they were famous...
(Funkwomble XBL and PSN DangerBoy73, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 5:38, Reply)

I'm Bill Gates.

edit for funkwomble: Yes, Bill Gates. The Asshole.
(Corn Dog, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 4:29, Reply)

More, I hear you cry?
Yes more.
Just remembered my six times great-grandad was apparently the first white man born in New Zealand, and so the Maoris gave him a load of land. Also my family tree is in Auckland museum because of this.
My mum admired china cups with Les Dennis after he asked her what she thought he should buy (she's not a shop assistant).
I harrassed Chris Eubank's shorter fatter brother, who is a doorman at Zap in Brighton.
I shouted at Phil Jupitus that he was grim after seeing him picking his nose at Glastonbury.
My brother camped opposite Bjork in Crackington Haven in Cornwall, and also met Thom Yorke in a pub there.
Erm...these are getting very tenuous.
(Lizzilla, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 3:41, Reply)

I have a few...
Ok, first off I met Keith from The Office a few months ago at my student union, he was great, he ate scotch eggs while he was DJing -



I also met Har Mar Superstar at Reading last year, which was great, as he is awesome -



Also I am friends with a girl called Rosie, who is mates with that Amy Studt girl who released a few singles a while back trying to be the english Avril Lavigne, but she got pissed with us once and shes a horrible girl, she spent the whole evening going on about how miserable she was, and she played us one of her songs, which was met by my friend Dave saying "That was shit!", and eventually her running out of our mates flat at 6am crying, and the next week she was on radio1!



And lastly, me and my mates were on MTV when those page 3 girls released that football-related single, in the audience -



I am the chin in the extreme top-right corner, but what you can't see in the picture is the fact that the black page 3 girl sat on the arm of the sofa has her arm rested right against my penis, so I had to stand there on live TV thinking unsexy thoughts so that I didn't get a massive lob on and freak her out, and embarrass myself in front of the nation.

(Also, for those who watch Video Clash Live, the telephone vote has no bearing on the video that they show, they just ask the audience which they'd rather see during the break.)
(Jon Norris, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 3:40, Reply)

I have:
called the daughter of an 80s media magnate a silly bitch
offered jonny vegas a light
been followed up the stairs by jon from s club after my bf was rude to him
and just the other day been to a birthday party in the same place as Linda Nolan

perhaps i should drink less
(agentp, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 2:58, Reply)

My own little crap claim to fame...
When I was a postal cadet in 1991, I worked alongside the nephew of William Gaunt, star of 1960s TV series "The Champions". Er. That's it. Oh, and my cousin plays for QPR, which is a slightly better claim to fame - but anything would be better than the first one!
(Leda74, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 2:42, Reply)

woo!
because the old translation of lord of the rings into swedish (dated 1959) sucked major ass, a new translation is underway. i am responsible for changing the old swedish name for rivendell ('vattnadal', which means something like 'water valley', due to the bastard translator reading it like 'riverdell' - plonker) into the new, fancy name 'riftedal' - actually meaning riven dale.

woo, the geekyness!
( vanja, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 2:41, Reply)

my grandparents
house turned into a big red phone with wheels in a direct line ad ages ago, the inside was their house too.
( the.jokl @jonksson, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 2:24, Reply)

I have two truely crap ones...
I used to work at a convenience store and my supervisor (Great bloke, and thats a description, not his name) was once turned down by the ex boyfriend of Brian of big brother 1.

Secondly, upon meeting Dianne Louise Jordan (of Blue Peter fame) I asked for her autograph. Now I frequently make hand gestures when speaking, and was even worse when I was ten years old. As a result I mimed a signature. Dianne decided to oblige, but only after making fun of my hand movements. 'Whats all this then?' she asked, mimicking me, 'What's all that about?'
(JamesG, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 2:02, Reply)

Limp
Working as a dj/rigger for an ents company whilst at uni, I had to help set up the equipment for a Mr Tim Westwood. He asked for a lot of stuff which was very expensive and fiddly, the awkward pompous git. He scratches CD's! Anyway, after the gig (him shouting 'lets go, bo bo bo' over a continual beat for two hours), he shook each crew member's hand.

He has a very limp handshake. The girl. And he requested champagne..in a student bar...we got it from Jackson's down the road, but don't tell him.
(b3tasux, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 1:52, Reply)

george michael's party
Well I jumped over the wall into George Michael’s party and was chatting top him for about 15 mins before his security realized I wasn't invited and chucked me out. (Surprising really considering I was wearing a hoody and jeans and everyone else was wearing a suite, and I was VERY drunk!.)
(mr.BIG I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 1:50, Reply)

Oh fame whoredom is great
Apparently, Noel Gallagher has heard my bands demo recently and said "this is the best thing ive heard all year".
Shame its only two months into the year.

So there :P
(boozemercenary, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:58, Reply)

Claim to fame
I once had a discussion with Justin Currie, be-sideburned lead singer/bassist of Scottish miserablist (but not as miserablist as some Scottish bands) rockers Del Amitri about socks and Mariah Carey's predeliction for curly drinking straws, backstage at Glasgow's mighty Barrowlands Ballroom. Billy Sloane from the Daily Record was kicking about as well.

How had I achieved such rock n roll liggerishness? My sister got piano lessons from the lead guitarist's auntie.

(and everyone I've mentioned here - Justin Currie, my sister, her piano teacher, the piano teacher's nephew, hell, even Billy Sloane. They're all lovely people.)
(wingnutkj, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:46, Reply)

a small future claim-to-fame...
...I'm on TV on Monday evening. Well, I'm one of 300 extras that played striking miners in Faith. So I probably won't be in it at all.

Ah well. If you spot this greasy twat (blue jumper, long hair, in front of the door), then you can be safe in the knowledge you'll have spotted my TV debut. And my houses'.

I've also met David Jason. I was only 9 months old at the time, but they were filming scenes for Open All Hours in Hexthorpe, Doncaster, where I was brought up. Met Paddy Ashdown (ex-Lib Dem leader) whilst on a day trip to France. I also took part in a pitch invasion at Doncaster Rovers the season they went down to the Conference, and got my fizzog on the front page of the Doncaster Star.

Oh, and I once poked the lead singer of the Suicide Machines in the eye at a gig at the Leadmill in Sheffield a few years back. Suicide who? Oh, never mind...

EDIT: Ooh, and my GCSE Art teacher is married to the guitarist from Embrace, and is in the video for their first ever single. *scrapes barrel*
( Biscuitzs -.. . -- ----- ...- -.- --. -.-, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:31, Reply)

I turned down a gig as bassist with Darius
and he had to use a midi keyboard instead of a bass guitar because everyone on earth knows he's arrogant. but what they dont know, and what I didn't know until I met a few people from round where he lives, is that he was breast fed until he was about ten (or some insane age like that). That explains why his brother, a really nice guy back then, needed braces.
( gaijintendo Regular Member, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:20, Reply)

I've also been on Channel 4 News
twice as an actor. I got paid £50 each time. One story was about the grade bump downs where people got their grades significantly marked down (ie. having initially had a highish D in Chemistry A Level, mine was marked down to about 2 marks off a fail) and the other story was about the value of a degree. I had to run around UCL in a gown and mortor board looking like a twat.
(jeaneye, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:19, Reply)

i met a certain
Axl Rose on the Northern Line just before he reappeared into the public eye. He was gross and smelly and had a big builders bum. He told my friend John that he was a Nazi because he had a shaved head. We all got off at Highgate and he then gave us travelcards which were supposedly valid for a year. I later lost mine.
(jeaneye, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:19, Reply)

Mangle
I once saw Mark Little (He was Joe Mangle in Neighbours) at a club. After saying 'Alright' to him I decided to ask him back to my flat to indulge in a left handed cigarette with me and my mates. Sadly by this point he wandered away and I couldnt find him again. Also at same club my mate sold a really bad eighth of crappy soap bar to the Souls Of Mischief. They'd never seen solid before and didnt know they were getting ripped off. Heh, who says Hip-Hoppers are streetwise?
( Alabaster Codify wouldn't piss on yr gums if yr teeth were on fire, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:16, Reply)

I fisted Tim Curry.


See?
( Malchick, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 0:11, Reply)

Elle Macpherson
Whilst working at a rather posh hotel, I was called to serve breakfast in bed to a room. A big black guy opened the door and showed me a 'lady' in bed to be served breakfast. It was Elle Macpherson not wearing alot. Jaw dropped, breakfast served, ran to phone anybody and everybody!!
(krafty, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 23:52, Reply)