tips anyone?
iv been dumped you see ... so this qotw comes at a convienient time
(ladyintheradiator, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:01, 74 replies)

Tell /qotw you've been dumped and wait for the gazes

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:02, closed)

gazescock pictures
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:06, closed)

Gazes Moob Pictures...

(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:41, closed)

Prepare the Pandertron!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:08, closed)

I think we're going to need extra bamboo.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:51, closed)

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 14:01, closed)

Oooh!
When's the wedding?
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 17:48, closed)

Sounds about right
Pics of tits also encourage attention (!). Well, attention or cock pics.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:46, closed)

better yet
tips for how to show one's face after crying in front of an entire queue outside a club. i foresee a particularly horrendous week.
(ladyintheradiator, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:13, closed)

You are a woman,
Women + Booze = Tears.
This is a (reluctantly) accepted fact.
(TheColonel, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:14, closed)

+ vulnerability + bad decisions.

(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:17, closed)

Are you from heaven?
Because it's gonna take a miracle to cure this herpes.
( Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:22, closed)

Sit tearfully at the bar
Crying into your highly alcoholic beverage of choice. You will soon be approached by many predatory, rebound-fucking cads. Use and discard. Until you find a genuinely sympsthetic one, he'll be the keeper.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:23, closed)

would that be synthetic sympathy?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:14, closed)

Sit in your room crying every night with a bottle of wine and letting the anger fester and grow.
I recommend a notepad to write down all the ways in which you will get revenge.
( girlinthehole, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:45, closed)

Just because it works for you,
doesn't mean it will work for anyone
(TheColonel, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:19, closed)

I thought it was a universal panacea for this kind of thing.

( girlinthehole, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:26, closed)

Ahhhhh
*HUGS*
(Obi wanker nobi Its not a bug, its an unexpected feature, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 10:46, closed)

Take the opportunity to enjoy your own company
And do stuff that you enjoy unfettered by someone else's taste, time, or wants.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:29, closed)

Like going to the pub every night...


*That could be just me.
(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:33, closed)

i was upset that id been dumped
now im more upset that this post has had more replies than any of my other posts put together. lol!
(ladyintheradiator, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:36, closed)

Well
you did mention that you were newly single on a website with a high proportion of men...

What were you expecting? ;-)
(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 11:42, closed)

- and lezzers.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:16, closed)

I'm one of them too.

(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:22, closed)

Single?
Only I know this girl that's been dumped and needs converting.
Not in love - but open to perversion.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:34, closed)

Yep
Sounds like fun, where do I sign? :-)
(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:47, closed)

On her left buttock, I'd suggest.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:42, closed)

Woot!

(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 18:58, closed)

Absolutely yes.
Indulge your own wants. When you're single it does't count as selfish.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:19, closed)

Hey, have you ever had your tits weighed?

(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:00, closed)

And do you like chicken?
I've got another 9 pages of these.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:01, closed)

Hahahaha

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:22, closed)

Shag his best mate
And make sure you do somethng with him that you'd never do with your ex
(Dwarfsmuggler Has hogtied Snow White, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:01, closed)

And make sure you tell the best mate he is bloody amazing.
Not like the last tossbandit.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:03, closed)

as long as his best mate's not a Labrador or equivalent.

(Kip, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:24, closed)

One word;
Femfresh.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:24, closed)

I know the feeling...
Fiancee left me about 6 weeks ago...it'll hurt like hell for a while...then you'll probably get a bit mad...then a bit spiteful..then you'll not give a shit and move on. It's the way it always works.

Not much help I know and I won't mention time is a great healer...bollocks!
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:29, closed)

I'm so sorry
and yes, time is a great healer. Might need a bit longer than 6 weeks though...
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:46, closed)

Yeah not saying I'm over it...but just that it does get easier...
and thanks :)
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:55, closed)

You're better off without her anyway
The love of my life left me for the woman he was cheating on me with, 9 months ago now. It still hurts from time to time but yes, it will and does get easier :)
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:25, closed)

She was the only girl I ever fell in love with in 32 years
So has been a bit tougher than other break-ups but hey ho. Thing is she still keeps in touch and that's probably not a good idea!
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 14:11, closed)

Keeps in touch you say?
So either she is a totally unfeeling dolt, or hasn't realised the pain that would cause, or misses you.
Or intends to cause pain.
Which is more likely? - and how best to deal with it?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 14:59, closed)

She tells me she misses me etc
The issue is she loves me (I believe) but also loves the idea of being single and free (she is only 25 after all), so she wants to keep me around...but also do her own thing...

SIGH
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:21, closed)

So is she entirely self-centred or just indifferent to the pain that inflicts on you?
If either - looks like you fell in love with the wrong girl.
I suspect we all do at least once or thrice. But if she's wrong, move on.
You will find another person to complement you. That person will be sure of it too - not dithering about like this loser. (Harsh? - she lost you didn't she?)
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:50, closed)

Thanks Larry
I know it's all true - but sometimes that's the problem isn't it? You have to admit they were flawed...
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 16:16, closed)

If she wants to be single and free
more than she wants to be with you, then I guess she doesn't love you as much as she should if she were going to marry you. So I guess she's done the right thing. If you need space then just ask her for that - I've found with even the exes that are now friends, we needed that period of no contact to get to that point. Massive hugs, break-ups suck :( You wil find someone else though :)
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 17:17, closed)

yeah that's a good point.
Thanks for the hugs!
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 18:04, closed)

resentment...
Time helps, gives you time to find something to resent in her, focus on that, eases the break-up then you can move on and look back at the good times without getting upset.

I'm saying that, I'm in the same boat too. Said she loved me (and I'd found a job and was about to move up closer to her) then the next week said she never loved me and didn't want to be together even though she told her friends and family she did and just has trouble committing to someone, gets scared and destructs her relationships...

Sucks big time, not easy getting over it but you have to have a period of resentment to get over it otherwise (like me) you'll end up in a rut and not be able to deal with it.

Wish I could say something funny or more constructive but break-ups suck! Drink helps!!!
(Something funny, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 20:54, closed)

I keep trying to find something to resent
For exactly that reason - but all I can remember is her amazing green eyes, smile, laugh, intelligence and awesome body and sex....

GRRRrrrrr

I have been down the drink route...sadly that didn't do me any favours and drove a lot of friends and family away. I'm more sorted now though and just need to focus on work, my health, and the rest will fall into place I think. Try it too :)
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 22:03, closed)

Did she ever
get annoyed at you for not putting the toilet seat down?
Steal the duvet EVERY FUCKING NIGHT?
Get terrible PMS where one minute she'd shout at you for daring to breathe loudly and then cry because she shouted?
Steal your chips?
Leave cupboard doors open and lights on and then worry about the bills?
Say that she was going to watch sport with you and then sulk because you were watching sport?
Hear you go to the toilet in the middle of the night and then try and stab you because she thought you were a burglar? (Ex housemate did this to me, terrifying!)
Decide that you were stealing her cheese, lick her cheese and the post notes on the fridge saying "I lick my cheese"?
Dye her hair green and then cry when you said you didn't like it?
Follow you from room to room telling you the neighbours had been shopping and BOUGHT CRISPS?
Have to wee every hour, on the hour?
Constantly knock things over and drop things? (My bf gets pissed off at me for doing this!)

Keep thinking, there'll be something... Yay :S
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 22:22, closed)

She....
...snored - I thought it was cute.
- stole the covers...I liked to watch her sleep anyway
- Shit like an elephant every morning at 7am. I just laughed with her about it.
- Couldn't cook for her life. I liked making her dinner and seeing her enjoy eating it.

I'm just a SAP!
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 22:47, closed)

Aww honey
no you're not, you're just human. Keep doing what you're doing and it will get better.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Thu 25 Feb 2010, 9:46, closed)

I have an idea...
Just allow whatever passes I make to be successful, and we can both have a new story to post this week.
(JaxxKami, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:34, closed)

The break-up kit
Food - preferably frozen ready meals.

Drink - soft drinks. Steer clear of the hard stuff. (You risk waking up in a strange bed with some strangers cum leaking out of your clout).

Entertainment - Get a boxset of some cheesy American drama (Battlestar Galactica, Prison Break, ER, that sort of thing), and sit and watch every episode while eating ready meals and drinking coke.

Should take the best part of a week.

You'll be fine after that.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:46, closed)

Not to mention several stone heavier and therefore without a chance of getting on the rebound for another six months
By which time you'll be fine.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:47, closed)

But to counter the weight gain
You'll have an encyclopedic knowledge of Series 1 of Battlestar Galactia.

That's sure to get somebody in the sack.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:49, closed)

I'd take a piece of that action
(danceswithferrets is leaking sanity, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 22:29, closed)

And for the girly version of this
Substitute ready meals and coke for chocolate and ice cream, and Battlestar Galactica for Scrubs (although Battlestar is AWESOME).
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:51, closed)

Battlestar is AWSOME ???
Proves my point.

Knowledge of cheesy American dramas = full blown sexual intercourse with a real live woman.

If I'd have said the complete back catalogue of Antiques Roadshow that probably wouldn't have had the same effect.
( SpankyHanky, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:53, closed)

Very true
But women need something to cry at for a week after a break up.

However, my boyfriend introduced me to Battlestar a little a while ago and yes, full blown hot horny sex with a woman has been happening for him ;)

Argos you say? Those glossy pages do make me a little moist...
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:56, closed)

Argos?
You didn't say argos. I don't know where I got that from. Ahem, do excuse me...
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 12:59, closed)

*observes*
*takes notes*
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:01, closed)

AaaahhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhAAAAAAhhhhhhh !!!
Argos makes you horny!!!

Fair plays.

I get quite erect whenever I think about Iceland.

(Especially the frozen fish isle).
( SpankyHanky, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:01, closed)

Frozen fish is NOTHING
compared to the microwaves pages. Mmm.... Microwaves...
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:22, closed)

Girls guide to flirting, with mind map
Hope this helps...
(mobi I completed the Internet on 'hard'. Twice., Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:05, closed)

hmm, is scrubs a woman thing? most the major fans i know are male
im actually a british comedy, monty python kind of girl. which is a good idea. i havent watched life of brian in a while. i find the best technique is to find a sad song (last time it was lou reed - perfect day) and play it ad nauseum until you are so bored you have to get out and do something else.
(ladyintheradiator, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 13:24, closed)

Squeeze your emotions into a tiny little ball and swallow them down, only for them to come out at some random time.....oh sry thats what i do...bad advice
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:01, closed)

YES!
Watch Life of Brian! Makes all lifes woes just dissapear.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:41, closed)

I don't think scrubs is majorly a woman thing
it just always seems to make me cry a little bit with the "Oh, that's so true.." moment at the end, hence being good for break ups.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 16:46, closed)

I've just recently been on an alice-in-chains o'thon for similar reasons. Now I'm sitting on my angry chair.
(danceswithferrets is leaking sanity, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 22:33, closed)

A bottle of wine for breakfast every morning
Will help you get over this break-up in no time.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 15:26, closed)

you can do one of two things
either sit in alone, wearing pyjamas, dosing yourself with haagen-dazs and vodka and watching shit like bridget jones for a week, or plan a sex-fuelled revenge rampage.
trust me, the second one is much more fun.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 16:32, closed)

....
Just whip your cock out.
(Tangerine_Avenger, Wed 24 Feb 2010, 17:32, closed)

Time is a great healer...
...but no where near as good as a few pints of vodka and fucking random hotties.
(Falco, Thu 25 Feb 2010, 12:44, closed)