Good god.
www.postchronicle.com/news/original/article_212205497.shtml

Silicone is approximately 1 g/cc. 7000 grams is 15.43 lbs.

Each.

10,000 grams is 22.06 lbs.

Each.

Carrying an extra 30 to 40 lbs on her chest has GOT to hurt. Not to mention that in a few years the weight of them will stretch her skin to the point of it looking like she has a second ass on the front of her hips...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 4 Feb 2009, 17:43, 12 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

'Noon thread
Looks like the day thread died. Have an early evening thread instead.


( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 15:24, 124 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Dear Off Topic
I have a PC.
It has a DVD drive.

I'm borrowing a DVD from someone at work tonight. Need to give 'em it back tomorrow.

I'm gonna risk sounding like an ultra-retard here...

How do I copy the film to my hard drive?
Is it as simple as "Ctrl+C" "Ctrl+V"? Or do I need some software?
( Cawl, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 15:17, 19 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Another question!
Is it possible to make an external hard drive WORM? (Write once read many)

If so, please tell!?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 12:43, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hello lower classes.
How are we all?

I'm excellent. Top form and all that.




Who wants to bring everybody down with their complaints?
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 4 Feb 2009, 12:42, 12 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Also
Test your English

news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/4246472.stm
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 12:17, 21 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

WTF?
news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7869301.stm

complete weirdo
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 12:15, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Reading this QOTW got me thinking.
I wasn't the best behaved boy at school nor the most studious. However I put in enough effort to get half decent grades, go to university and I now have a decent job. However many answers realte a certain amount of pride in avoiding education and consequently it's benefits.

Although it gets a lot of abuse this country's education system is good and it's free to the masses.

Therefore is it fair to say that if an individual fails to take advantage of what's freely offered to them then they should be left to fend for themselves with no governemnet support.

Discuss in no more than 250 words, to be handed in on Thursday.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 11:51, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Q. How does Bob Marley like his donuts?
A. With Jammin'

Mornin' all

:(
(p-arran-oid prolapsed here, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 11:30, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

What's the difference between your mum and a bag of apples?
Your mum's a slag.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 11:25, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ladies and Gentlemen...
I require expert help.

I've been asked to search for an OCR reading software, which will allow us to enter a number, it can then graphically search a list of jpgs for the corresponding barcode. The barcode will be stand alone, with nothing referring to it.

Can anyone please help me? I have half an hour to give a yes or no answer!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 11:16, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm not a fan of hers in the slightest...
But I can't help but feel sympathy here, having everyone know her every condition, whether or not she wants them to.

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7869090.stm
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 10:12, 26 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

For No3l
I've banged up a quick script that let's Luddites create redirect pages.

You just name your page anything you like then put in the url you'd like it to redirect to and it'll do the rest for you.

www.daftdoggy.com/readers/redirect.html

So if you want to goatse your workmates, now you can.

edit: oops. Just realised that a bit of code broke so some people might have got the message "fuck you" if they tried this when I posted it. Fixed now.


Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 9:22, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

When I was a wee young Hullian
I played piano and violin. Because of this, I found out I was able to sing and for 4 years have been taking voice lessons.
I'm actually quite good, but would never dare sing in public.
BUT.......I really want to get back on the piano. I don't have a lot of talent, musically...I'm one of those "jack of all trades, master of none" but I found a piano locally for $395 if I pick it up. It's in "good" condition, tuning needed but it appears to be sound carpentry wise. I'll gladly pay up to $500 to restore a piano.

God only knows why I'm posting this, I think I just want "go for it" positive type responses (so Bert and Al, love you guys but piss off already).

I can read music, is it that hard to "re-learn" stuff from 15 years ago???
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 7:04, 11 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Day thread
I've been up since half-three, thanks to a police search helicopter doing manouvers over my roof for twenty minutes.

Are you a morning or night person?


( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 6:24, 345 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

New Campaign: Cut Out Cue

Or COC for short

This has been getting on my nerves for some time now, and I'm sure I can't be the only one.

I love reading QOTW, but this enjoyment is marred by the prevalence and misuse of word 'cue'

Dictionary definitons would suggest the word, when used as a noun, means a prompt or signal or when used as a verb, means to give that prompt or signal.

So, a QOTWer who sets a scene beautifully in a paragraph or two, and continues the story with 'Cue me, lying over the bench, with my knickers around my ankles, and half a rugby team up my arse' ARE USING IT INCORRECTLY

And don't get me started on people who spell it 'queue' in this context

(although with half a rugby team, there probably WOULD be a queue....)


/rant
(Lolitaslittlesister, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:10, 14 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ladies and Gentlemen, it's the Tuesday night thread

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:38, 63 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Has anyone got
a nice, short, easy-to-remember link to a goatse?

I'm going to write it on a heart and put it in the British Heart Foundation window for Valentine's Day.

Edit: if you have the technical ability of creating a domain redirect to a goatse... that'd rock!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 16:52, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

So it's my birthday today,
Up until this morning, today was probably going to be shitty. Demonstrating labs for undergrads 9-12, boring meetings at 1, 2, and 3 pm.

1) The undergrads baked me a cake (fucking woo!) and I basically arsed around for 3 hours

2) My meetings at 2 and 3 got cancelled due to the weather

3) The meeting at 1 was actually quite good fun

Now I'm off early down the pub. So shitty day has actually turned into quite a glorious day! Plus I haven't made a snowman on my birthday since I was 2! Yay!
(The Oscillating Gibbon is eating curried squid, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 16:21, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

You lot continue to corrupt me.
Yesterday as I was working on a project here at work, I had to talk on the phone with a vendor regarding some parts for a filter we're building. These things are basically hollow plastic blocks with slots in the top, to allow water to flow into them and be collected to drain out.

It seems that they are made to connect to one another with a sort of male and female end to them. The term they have applied to the smaller fitting is the spigot end, and the larger fitting that it goes into is the bell end.

When they were talking to me about making the end block by cutting off the bell end and sealing the hole, I about pissed myself.

It's all your fault, b3ta!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 15:16, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Why are some people so stupid?
Fact the first: it's snowed quite a lot over the last couple of days.

Fact the second: when trodden down, snow gets compacted so much it's incredibly icy and slippery.

Fact the third: the best way to walk across this ice is by wearing stout shoes with a good grip.

I wore my hiking boots to the office today. No, they don't go with my smart black trousers, and yes, I looked a bit strange wearing a smart fitted coat, and nice trousers tucked into muddy boots.

Some women exited the tube at the same time as me. They, being slaves to fashion and all, had elected to wear their delicate little kitten-heeled shoes with sparkly bits on. They cast scornful looks at my ugly, clumpy footwear.

Then one of them slipped on the ice. She grabbed on to her friend, who also slipped. Much to my disappointment, neither fell over, but the look of panic on their faces made me all warm inside.

It took me the usual 5 minutes to walk to the office. 15 minutes later, I saw them teeter in, looking on the verge of tears, and complaining loudly about how sore and cold their feet were.

Why oh why can't people dress appropriate to the weather conditions? Why are they so surprised when barely-there shoes offer no grip and no protection against the cold?
Bloody morons.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 13:57, 45 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm on a half day today
so I plan to get my hair cut as it's looking a bit mop-like at the moment, write some essays which I'll finish at the weekend and watch some films.

Then this evening I'm heading back to work to teach owners how to look after their puppies.

What do you all have planned for this afternoon?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 13:13, 69 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Will anybody save Geoffrey??
Poor sod..

www.savethelamb.iwarp.com/
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 12:29, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

bored, bored, bored
I'm still off work with me poorly ickle elbow and after day three am begining to get bored.

what to do. Bare in mind I cant drink, (painkillers, anti-inflams, antibiotics) darent risk mixing with people, (knock on the wound would floor me), and theres only so many hours I can sleep. I cant even go for a walk as the entire town is one big ice-rink at the mo.

Been playing on the internet, off course, and came across a browser based game called "TRAVIAN" . Looks entertaining if a little slow.

has anyone in B3TA land got any expereince of it?
(bugboybeast, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 12:27, 11 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Update
To this in reply
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 10:41, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Little Bastards!
.
I saw something take-off from my arm and clapped and splattered the bastard. It was a mosquito that had just finished feeding on me. The reason I managed to hit it was that it was so swollen with blood that it had the areo-dynamic properties of Fern Britton.

When it splattered it left a blood clot on my hand the size of a ten pence piece.

Just checked my arm and I've been bitten three times. I'm still not fully acclimatised to these twats and the lumps are visibly growing.

Still - it's not as bad as last year when each bite looked like I had a golf ball burried under my skin.

And don't get me started on the bush flies....

Just thought I'd share.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 10:38, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Is this the work of anybody on here?
Screengrab sent to me this morning
notts webcam screengrab
(turtles head is touching cloth poked a dwarf on the forehead at, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 8:45, 1 reply, 16 years ago)