Just wanted to say thanks.
What are you thankful for this year? And what can just fuck right off?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:10, 245 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

thankful - drunk welsh girls
fuck off - the sex offenders register
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:12, Reply)

So are you getting your end away at the minute Bobby?
I've spied hints on the board.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:17, Reply)

seeing a girl from uni, going well at the mo cheers

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:21, Reply)

Good man, all the best for you.
Still no sign of Serenity :(
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:22, Reply)

that is shit. I'll resend it.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Much obliged.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:28, Reply)

Woo!
*buys a hat*
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:22, Reply)

how did you know she is bald?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:28, Reply)

Just a hunch!

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:32, Reply)

this is uncanny!! have you been spying on her?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:33, Reply)

Threadstompers can fuck right off
And I count myself in that, hence the deletion of my thread.

I'll address the year in a minute. In less than 24 hours England gave Australia an innings shellacking and Nottingham Forest stuck five goals past the filth. I'm so pleased about this that I'm prepared to take whatever anti-sporting brickbats you may have to hand.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:12, Reply)

I care not for sports other than F1, but I'm happy that you're happy so GO TEAM etc.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:13, Reply)

Thanks darling
You're such a sweetie
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:23, Reply)

So you won the show did you?
How much?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:24, Reply)

£2,610
Contemplating spunking some of it on a Wii for the missus today
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:33, Reply)

That's pretty good.
Wii ahhhhh yeah, get Warioware and the Raving Rabbids games for proper WTF party gaming, and if you like Zelda games get Twilight Princess.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:34, Reply)

That was going to be my next question actually!
I need recommendations for games other than Sports Resort and Just Dance 2, which will come with it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Download World of Goo - you won't regret it.
The Rock Band and Guitar/DJ Hero games are great, Rock Band particularly as a party game. The Boom Blox games are fun, Mario Kart is plain stupidly manically epic especially four-player with 12 others online, FIFA11's alright, GoldenEye, New Super Mario Bros is great if you like the Mario games generally, Mario Galaxy and Galaxy 2 are fucking stupendous and will keep you going for hours and hours. Okami is possibly the best game I've ever played although that was on the PS2, I reckon it'd work really well on the Wii. Force Unleashed looks the tits but I've not played it, it's on my list. Wii Fit's pretty good for its yoga and muscle exercises and daft minigames.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:52, Reply)

Bloody hell, good man
Thank you very much sir
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:56, Reply)

No problem.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:08, Reply)

Force Unleashed is so short I wouldn't pay more than a tenner for it.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:31, Reply)

I'm happy that Luke Moore scored for Derby
as it increases the chances of us getting rid of him permanently, the overpaid slacker.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:53, Reply)

I am thankful for getting through the year and everyone here putting up with my whinging and still talking to me.
Snot can fuck right off.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:17, Reply)

Hey, your whinging is endearing.
It's not even that you do it that much. Put it this way, if you were a cunt we'd tell you to fuck off. As it is you're pretty awesome so we accept it.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:19, Reply)

Thank you Noel : )

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:22, Reply)

Are you off north today?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:22, Reply)

I am. I'm off about 11.30am.
I'm so looking forward to seeing DG and Tourettes again.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:25, Reply)

Smart, I got a call from Tourette's and DG on Christmas night.
I suspect she was a bit pissed, DG certainly was. It was lovely to hear from them though, she was worried I was lonely cos she knew daughter was away.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Aw bless her : )
I suspect you may get the same New Year from me. *grins*
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:32, Reply)

I suspect I may be sober and fast asleep, but you're welcome to try.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Well I assumed you'd be sober but not asleep : (
Are you working New year's day?
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:41, Reply)

Nah, I'm just not really a NYE kinda guy.
It was such a massive let-down for so many years on the trot with one exception. I've promised myself next year I'll do something wonderful and start to enjoy it again - I think that'll be much easier if I don't drink.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:53, Reply)

I spent a great deal of New Year eves at home alone but it didn't bother me really.
When my sis had a my nephew I would babysit so she could go out.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:57, Reply)

Might be up north next year, we'll see.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:02, Reply)

Woo!
Best way to spend New Year's Eve IMHO
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:32, Reply)

Thankful for the year finishing on an awesome note
The rest of the year can fuck off.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:29, Reply)

Hey look, it's BK!
Alright chap?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:31, Reply)

I am, thanks Noel!
Looking forward to heading up to DG and Tourette's tomorrow.
Buying some nice cakey things to take up today.

How was your Xmas?
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Woo! hello Beekers.
How is the lovely Miss Beekers?
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:33, Reply)

*waves*
Hullo! She's fine and dandy! She's working 'til lunch time so I've got the run of her house until then.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:34, Reply)

Yay!
So what did you find in her underwear draw then?
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Underwear?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:37, Reply)

Underwear
And Narnia.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:37, Reply)

Well I have half right

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:38, Reply)

The Panties, The Bra and The Butt-Plug?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:40, Reply)

*applauds*

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:41, Reply)

Don't you just hate it when you open your wardrobe to grab a shirt
and a magical lion needs your help?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:41, Reply)

hahaha! *Clicks*

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)

I'm thankful for a job
And the news I heard that although I didn't get a previous job due to the company firing loads of folk at the same time*, the folk that interviewed me apparently thought I was great and would have loved to give me the job if they could have.

How's the new flat going Noely-Noely-Noel?

*Which may have made me a bit depressed for a while.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:33, Reply)

Excellent for job news, you're moving south somewhere aren't you?
The new flat's homely, still needs a few comforts but it's positively awesome thanks!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Cardiff
Or that area anyway. Once I find somewhere to live, which'll hopefully be before I'm due to start.

Woo for homeliness. I can't wait to go to Ikea and buy stuff.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:43, Reply)

Neither can I, at the end of February when I've saved enough money.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:54, Reply)

i'm thankful for london when it's so dead like this
millions of seats on the tubes, inner temple walk up to work is empty, taxi home last night took 15 mins... it's brilliant.

the presentation i need to give to 150 surveyors in jan can fuck right off, trying to make it (i) relevant; (ii) short enough; (iii) technical enough; (iv) not too technical; and (v) pitched at an appropriate level for everyone from grad trainees to 30 years PQE is killing me.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:36, Reply)

Sock puppets are the answer to your presentation woes
They'll educate the thickos and amuse the bored ones.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:38, Reply)

what kind of a puppet would represent
the landlord and tenant act 1927 and unreasonably withholding consent though?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:39, Reply)

BIG MAGENTA COCK

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:39, Reply)

Sooty with a monocle
and Sweep with a flat cap.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:39, Reply)

Rizzo the Rat
And Big Bird
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:46, Reply)

in a curious way
this is quite appealing. big bird the bumbling innocent tenant who just wants to improve his shop/assign his lease...... rizzo the evil landlord rat......
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:48, Reply)

Your presentation in January can fuck right off, I'm talking about 2010 here lady.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:39, Reply)

but i'm WRITING it this year, doesn't that count?
otherwise you'll just get me ranting more about shit men and how they are all shit and having no money for the next couple of months and ANOTHER of my friends selfishly getting pregnant (although i told a different friend and she said "great just what the world needs, another fucking ugly ginger baby" which made me feel a lot better) and how stiff i am after 2 hours in the gym last night and an hour this morning...

even sitting through the presentation would be more interesting, no?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:42, Reply)

You are Madonna AICMFP
Lay off the gym a bit. Try something more inclined to help you relax.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:46, Reply)

i am going to try and go at least once a day until 31 jan
then i will drop back to 3-5 times a week as i'll be able to walk home again on the nights i've been out!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:48, Reply)

I can talk. I'm upping my gym time next year.
Laying off the wine and trying to lose a stone.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:49, Reply)

good resolution
i am swopping monday night sessions for that 2 hour extra sweaty yoga class in the new year. bit nervous, it sounds seriously hard-core - you're not allowed to leave the room at all, even if you think you are going to faint/are dying for the toilet...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:52, Reply)

I've heard of that.
I couldn't do it. I'd get claustraphobic.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:54, Reply)

i am quite claustrophobic too
it's one of the reasons i'm such a restless sleeper, i think the sheets are trying to strangle me.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:59, Reply)

only if you got your tits out

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:48, Reply)

i'll probably do that inadvertently anyway
by dropping something and bending over or something like that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:49, Reply)

I am thankful for learning that cooking is not hard
and that things you cook yourself from scratch taste better than things in plastic trays.

Government cuts can fuck right off. It's just posing, they never go after the real budget shortfall - corporate tax avoidance.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:40, Reply)

I'm pleased you've made that discovery, if everyone cooked from scratch this country would be much better off.
Except for the ready-meal companies, of course.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:41, Reply)

They can fuck right off
except when I'm ill and need comfort food
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:43, Reply)

cooking sucks!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)

Nothing really stands out for me to be thankful about,
so I'll just go with being relatively young and relatively healthy.

Unreliable cars, snow, my brother's stupid needy cat and the general idiot public can all fuck right off. Nobody has any manners anymore.

One way or another, though, 2011 is going to involve me sorting some stuff out, so I'm looking forward to that. Been in a kind of limbo this past couple of years, career and living arrangement-wise.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Thank you Noel, you've been lovely to me and everyone else on the board.
Well, within reason.

I'm thankful for friends, new and old, and I'm thankful I wasn't kicked out of uni or anything.
Essays and men can fuck right off.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Awww, that's far too sweet.
Can you temper it with a scathing insult please?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:56, Reply)

i could

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Fire away.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:01, Reply)

it wouldn't be about you though
today it would be about the workmen i walked past in a short skirt and boots (me, not the workmen) WHO DIDN'T WHISTLE AT ME.

this is a criminal offence.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Errr...
I CAN'T.

Well, erm, it's a shame that you smell so much though.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:22, Reply)

That's my girl.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:32, Reply)

How the fuck am I going to pack?
Contemplating bunging it all in a plastic storage box and taking that down. Bloody glass bottles.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:35, Reply)

2010 can fuck right off.
Stupid fucking year that its been.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:52, Reply)

You met me.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:54, Reply)

AA posted your fucking awful T'Pau joke on Facebook last night and I deleted him as a friend.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 9:58, Reply)

I think I missed the joke.
Is that a good thing?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:25, Reply)

Yep it was shit.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:47, Reply)

I'm thankful that I've gotten a lot better, and that I'm lucky enough to be travelling on the other side of the world.
and I'm in a pretty okay mood about everything and everyone. Although yesterday I told an AIDs collector to fuck off.

I feel bad about that now.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Have you ever shoed a Salvation army man?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:08, Reply)

It's funny because of the old joke:
Have you ever shoed a horse?
No but I've told a Donkey to fuck off.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:13, Reply)

AIDS collectors can fuck right off.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:08, Reply)

Exactly. I don't see what good it does the world to just go round collecting AIDS...

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:17, Reply)

git.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:30, Reply)

*cackles evilly*
Meh. It was only a month or so ago that I nearly told a beggar in a wheelchair to fuck off - it's only natural to feel bad about it afterwards, but surely the AIDS collector must have done or said something to rile you and therefore had it coming?
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:39, Reply)

He mentioned the Ashes

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)

nah I was just in a spectacularly bad mood.
Was all upset over not being able to find my hostel, I'd been travelling for 15 hours, and I was hungry and stressed. Normally I would have at least listened to him but i was already on the verge of crying in public and talking to anybody would have finished me.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)

of course you do
if one person collects it, it saves the rest of us.

i can't believe poppet told such a selfless human being to fuck off, i am truly shocked.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)

The year has been ok overall, nothing I'd change really.
Getting evicted could fuck off though.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:06, Reply)

I'm thankful that the first 10 months of 2010
Didn't suck as hard as the last two, and that there've been a bunch of people on here who were willing to put up with my constant beakering about it. I second lampers in saying men can all fuck off.
(berk, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:07, Reply)

So mean about men :(

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:20, Reply)

We're terrible cunts, though.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:21, Reply)

Not all of us
I know I am though, I treat women like shit, yessireebob, like the shit on my shoes
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:25, Reply)

I wasn't especially
I just said you can all fuck off because you're more trouble than you're worth. I didn't say you were all a terrible bunch of cunts because you're not.
(berk, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:32, Reply)

I am not complaining about men again.
We shall all take it as red that they are crap and move forward.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:34, Reply)

If I do that I'll have nothing to say :(

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:35, Reply)

yeah, this

(berk, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)

We're like the three sodding Fates.
Baggsy being Clotho.


Edit: Actually, I'm thinking of the Graeae. I don't know their names.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Can I be the pretty one?

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)

None of the Graeae are pretty
we have one eye and one tooth between us and we live in a cave. And we're grey.

As the oldest if we were going down the Moirae route, you'd be Atropos, which isn't altogether good.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)

I know.
I was being silly : )
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Ah, I see.
I'm not entirely up to speed. I have an entire bag made of presents though, and none of them are mine! This makes me feel good.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)

Chevron

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)

But the three of you are all pretty :/

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Dana, Enya and I forget the other one

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)

Women should be seen and not heard.
edit CHEVRON
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)

Well, I can't argue with that
I'm far too needy with my desire for hugs and cuddles apparently.
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:35, Reply)

Yeah, you CUNT
How dare you want cuddles when you're both on the sofa watching TV
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:37, Reply)

Bender.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Maybe so, but I'm a bloody good looking one

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:47, Reply)

You tell'em, sister
They helped contribute to a sleepless night, and not in the good way at all.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:28, Reply)

Well beaker away in your own time in 2011 then berk.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:13, Reply)

having no secretaries can also fuck off
how the hell does one insert a new slide in power point? argh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:13, Reply)

www.powerfinish.com/templates3.html
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:21, Reply)

thank you both
god, you'd have wet yourselves laughing at me at the gym last night - they have spent a fortune on all this new equipment, and amongst other things have now got bikes with big screens that simulate mountain biking/racing etc.

between my hatred of bikes and my ineptitude with computers, i was beyond useless. i simply could NOT work out which way to lean and i kept going the wrong way and cycling over cliffs and up rockfaces. which is pretty fucking knackering. the personal trainer was crying with laughter, as were the severely hot blokes running on the treadmill behind me :((((((((((((((((((
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:29, Reply)

They wouldn't have been cold if they were running on the treadmills

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:30, Reply)

=/
=/ =/ =/ =/ =/ =/
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:32, Reply)

i don't understand
spik eengleesh, boy
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Just assume the usual reaction I have
when you mention something like this. How can you lean the wrong way? It doesn't make sense.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)

because it confused me
i was right, the bike was wrong. stupid computer.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:48, Reply)

If you want to turn left, you lean left.
Surely you can't have been consistently leaning right. Where would the logic be in that?
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)

erm
i'm trying to picture the screen, no, if you want the bike to turn left, you have to lean right, surely?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:57, Reply)

Why?
And show your working, I'm genuinely fascinated.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:01, Reply)

No sweetie, if you want the bike to turn left, you lean left.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:02, Reply)

but then you fall off!
the screen is going left anyway, so you have to lean right to balance it out....
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)

Oh my God.
Suddenly the inability to alter a clock to tell the time correctly makes sense.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)

no you don't - it's just about momentum and stuff.
even though I don't get the maths behind physics, I know that you're just supposed to go with it.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

but if the bike is curving left
and i want it in a straight line, surely that means leaning to the right to straighten it up???

argh why is my brain wired up wrong? so in a car if i am skidding to the left, i should turn the wheel to the LEFT? cos i thought i should turn it to the RIGHT to counteract the skid?

fuck, good job i haven't skidded yet...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)

no, you turn into the skid
so that the wheels are pointing in the direction of motion - the "I meant to do that" maneouvre. This allows the tyres to regain traction and THEN you turn away.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:29, Reply)

ok.......
..... so if the car skids to the left, i turn the wheel to the left, then back to the right?

what if i am on the motorway and there is something already on my left - strawberry jam?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:40, Reply)

No. Oh my God.
On the computer, the screen was moving to the left because that is presumably where you're supposed to turn left in order to follow the track, or whatever. You turned right and ended up in a cliff.

For God's sake don't apply that logic to real life. Real life and computers are two different things, please try to bear this in mind.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:44, Reply)

Fine, I'm going to have to explain physics, a subject with which I am barely familiar.
When you corner on a bike, you lean into the corner. When you turn left, you lean left. This is because you have a high centre of gravity on a bike and if you don't lean when you turn, you will lose your balance, because the direction of motion and inertia are no longer in balance. You will fall off to the right.

Cars do not follow this rule. The centre of gravity is much lower and you're dealing with traction vs inertia, not gravity.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:49, Reply)

i'm not going to lie to you
this makes no sense to me whatsoever.

and i read it three times. with my finger under each word.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:51, Reply)

When on a bike, lean in the direction you want to go when you corner
if you're in a skidding car, turn the wheel in the direction you want to go.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)

Next week, on "Ask A Man"
a summary of the rules of Cricket, pitched at a level even the prettiest of women can understand.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I am horribly sexist.
In my defence, I wouldn't be if it wasn't consistently necessary.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Right click > new slide

( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:24, Reply)

I'm thankful that I finished losing weight
I'm also thankful to the NHS for totally saving my life
And for having such awesome friends :D
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:16, Reply)

I think my health problems can fuck right off, they're a real pain in the guts.
But it could be worst, I should be in theory shitting through a bag at some point in my life to date and it's a mircal that I'm not.

I'm also thankful for :-
Seeing dogs walking around the street, having friends that put up with my absentiesum, having food/water/shelter, my telly system, hollyoaks, fags, being awesome at what I do, bars of galaxy chocolate, being able to function as a resonably independant human being, having crushes on girls and doing something about it, having a wicked job, helloween and christmas lights, those moments where you're fast-forwarding the adverts on something you've recorded and you press 'play' at the exact moment the advert stops, my watch, my ma', when you listen to music and it gets you in the mood for whatever it is you want to be in the mood for, when you watch an old telly show and your fave actor has a camio and you're like 'woh', the internet, apple products, cans of Red Bull or 'V'.... but more than any of that, being content with life - no matter how shit it can get.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:22, Reply)

At the risk of sounding sentimental, I'm very thankful to Poppet for taking me to Belgium with her. I needed a holiday much more than I realised, methinks.
(And I'm also thankful that the exchange rate was a lot better than I initially thought. Can I get a "woo" over here for having more money left than I thought.)

For once I'm not going to tell anything to fuck right off. That can wait until the new year. I'm not actually in miserable cunt mode at the moment so I think I'll make the best of it.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:29, Reply)

Woo!
Same here. I'm quite chipper so refuse to be drawn into my usual miserable cunt mode.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Quite a nice feeling, isn't it? I should try this more often...

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)

It is. I'd forgotton how pleasant it is.
I will try to keep this going for as long as possible. First one to be miserable buys the other a pint.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)

*gets a round in*

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

woo!
Glad to hear it.
(berk, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)

You're more then welcome! It was lovely having company.
And thanks for translating all the french for me!! :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:03, Reply)

for Monty
music.uk.msn.com/news/articles.aspx?cp-documentid=155707287
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:31, Reply)

hahahaha
I also have something for him
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:34, Reply)

I also have something for him but I'm not posting a picture of it on here.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:37, Reply)

Ooh-err.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:48, Reply)

Exactly!

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)

Damn you now I have an advert stuck in my head.
"Milk? Eurgh."
"Ian Rush says, if I don't drink lots of milk, when I grow up I'll only be good enough to play for Accrington Stanley."
"Accrington Stanley? Who are they?"
"Exactly!"
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:09, Reply)

awesome!!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:50, Reply)

It is rather.
David Bowie has a wolf on a leash. Your argument is invalid.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:01, Reply)

I am thankful for heating.
I didn't have it last year and it's nice.

Whichever neighbour is playing 'let's-run-up-and-down-stairs-as-loudly-as-possible-when-Bella's-hungover' can fuck off and die.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Can we talk about football?
I think I'd prefer to have to read about that than further talk about how all men are crap.

I'm a man and I'm pretty fucking awesome, thank you very much.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)

I really think we can do it this season
we just need to play up to the whistle
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:47, Reply)

Hey you, you're a man
are you crap or awesome?
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:48, Reply)

As a man I am too busy being awesome to consider such a question
Shall we go and meet some women that we fancy, but not that much, and lie to them?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:52, Reply)

Usual male attack pattern.
Complement them on some random part of themselves that we reckon they might be a bit insecure about, act all beta male-ish and sensitive, lure them into bed before wiping our dicks on the curtains and never talking to them again?

It's what ALL men do.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)

holy shit
that's it ladies, the only decent man on the planet has just revealed himself to be THE SAME AS ALL THE REST .

it's time to turn gay.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)

Tried it. Found it wanting.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)

This.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)

so the answer is........
celibacy?

that's not a good answer to anything. although, query whether shit sex is better than no sex, at least if you've had no sex, you can walk around and cross your legs without wincing.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)

WANKING.
Ideally on webcam.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)

Oh, tits.
Pass me the needle and thread, I'm going to sew up my Sarlaac pit.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)

Petal, if you keep calling it that it's no wonder you're striking out.
No-one wants their lightsaber slowly digested over a thousand years.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)

If Mandalorian battle armour can't resist it
a simple helmet has no chance.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:13, Reply)

Both these made me laugh a little more than it should have
Congrats, boys.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)

Aint I a stinker, DING DONG!

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)

you're doing v well
keep it up (2, 3, 4)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:49, Reply)

I think I exhausted my football vocab there
perhaps I should start watching football focus instead of Spongebob Squarepants?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)

i'm no longer able to talk to you
due to my crushing disappointment at the post above.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)

I love Spongebob squarepants.
*waves at the Colonel*
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:01, Reply)

blimey
i knew there was a queue for this guy, but i didn't realise it was quite this quick!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:02, Reply)

I was just waving at a fellow Spongebob fan is all.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:03, Reply)

*waves back*
I think Miss Swipe meant my post Re: Lying to women
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)

i don't think you get to call me "miss swipe" any more
"your highness" or "madam" is good enough for the likes of you!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:05, Reply)

OW!
take that thumb off my head
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)

oh alright
i'm bored with pouting now.

has your snow gone yet?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)

All gone
and Charlie has stopped looking for the snow. She was acting very strangely after it all melted.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)

awwww bless
i'd have thought her chicken brain didn't have that much recollection, clearly i am wrong.

you do realise that if you ever came to a bash, you would have to bring charlie tucked under one arm?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)

She would love the all the attention
the little madam
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Bringing Charlie to a bash?
You are Monty

AICMFP
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:34, Reply)

Ha!
very good
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Someone would try and pull her

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:39, Reply)

Yeah, some 'cock-of-the-walk'

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:43, Reply)

i am sure charlie has better taste
just don't let her get too drunk
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:50, Reply)

Alrite Dave

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)

hello you

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

Me and my big mouth...err...fingers?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:03, Reply)

i really did have to think about that then
but you just meant typing, didn't you?!?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)

Yes

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)

shows what this place has done to my levels of social acceptability

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

Haha!
I reckon the gunners are up for the cup next year. United will be second if they play Rooney up front and keep the tall one at midfield.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:52, Reply)

Ga?
I'm clearly out of my depth here
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)

Spouting bollox about football is easy.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:55, Reply)

what was that ludicrous display last night?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)

Clearly we need to get a striker in in January/the Summer
Otherwise I just can't see where the goals are going to come from.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:39, Reply)

fucking awesome, thank you very much oh so pretty, I am pretty and witty and GAAAAAAAY
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)

Only when the whinging from the other side
gets too much to bear.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:52, Reply)

I'd rather not talk about football...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)

haha your team sucks
Wolves? FFS.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I'm thankful for you lot, you've kept me going this year
And 2010 can fuck right off, it's been the worst year of my life.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)

Really? The worst year?
not wanting to drag up painful memories, but wasn't your 8th year pretty bad?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)

I thought he was asleep
for most of this year.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

It was a remarkably shit year, but i was supported by everyone
This year I've been alone for most of it. I also made the mistake of falling in love again.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)

That is shit
Well, if you ever need a friend to talk to...give Blousie a gaz
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)

hahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)

I'm surprised you've managed to be so chipper and upbeat and...
Oh.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)

when you are all scathing like this
i can totally see why you are in the Tripod
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)

You're a dick Noel.
Let him sleep.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)

I know, I know.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:54, Reply)

I'm off now!
Everyone have a lovely time : )

Catch you later.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)

bye!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)

Have a Happy New Year Blousie.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Have a great time!

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)

Happy Easter!

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)

Merry Passover!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I've been passed over many times
and it was never merry
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:30, Reply)

sainsburys are actually selling EASTER EGGS
this is disgraceful, it's still DECEMBER ffs
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Tesco are as well

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:29, Reply)

I have a female friend who works in compliance at Tesco
She had to go in on Christmas day to take the fucking Christmas decorations down...
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:30, Reply)

niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)

I no rite!
They've got Christmas stuff in the shops as well, and that's not for another sodding year!

*crunches carrot*
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)

why are they conspiring to shorten our lives
and make us eat MOAR CHOCOLATE? why?

speaking of which, someone has left chocolate oranges out on the kitchen counter. muchas gracias...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)

My auntie gave me a big box of M&S chocolates
but they're a bit naff tbh.

Cadbury FTW!
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:42, Reply)

i like cadburys
but it has to be hotel chocolat FTW.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:43, Reply)

I do my best to avoid it
I love chocolate, but my metabolism isn't what it was. Gone are the days of blindly eating everything.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:46, Reply)

i blame the sedentary desk lifestyles
of law and accountancy.

we should have been a bareback western rider and a deep sea diver. then we could have LIVED in hotel chocolat.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 11:49, Reply)

that would surely complicate the horseriding and diving, though

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Dec 2010, 12:00, Reply)