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This is a question Off Topic

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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Yeh', anyway....
I donno if anyone here knows of Top Lad, but it's basicly a bragging site for Sun readers, take a browse around here to see the gyst of it: www.toplad.org/

So let's post our TOPLAD posts here, seeing as the whole thing is fictional, it doesn't matter if you are a lad or laddette.

Also, tee hee, they haven't locked their dirs... www.toplad.org/img-upload/ .... these are what I've found.... so I just knocked up this: coll3ctive.co.uk/toplad.php NSFW
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:20, 197 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
boys are so bless
sometimes it's like they think they are people
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:24, Reply)
irl lol

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:28, Reply)
It's funny how they're mostly young boys, hardly even teenagers.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:32, Reply)
i managed to scare a snake under my back deck
TOTALLY-DOING-IT-WRONG-LAD
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:29, Reply)
FFS Gonz,
put the NSFW tag on the link, sticking it at the top of the page isn't much help.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:35, Reply)
Really sorry mate.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:21, Reply)
I did try to post a hilariously droll false anecdote, but it's moderated so it probably won't go through.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:40, Reply)
Yeah.
I gave that a go first time toplad was linked to on here. They won't post anything like that, unfortunately.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:20, Reply)
Miserable gets, not a sense of humour between them.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:12, Reply)
No time for people that constantly write and text smilie faces nottwelveanymore LAD
Nope. Thirteen now.


...although this is one that does have a point.
(dchurch bah, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 18:51, Reply)
Boys are crap.
Woo for girls.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:38, Reply)
alright BGB
had a good day?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:39, Reply)
Been ok.
What are you up to this weekend
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:41, Reply)
London
the zoo on Sunday. Should be fun. You?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:07, Reply)
Being chained up in our dungeon.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:10, Reply)
Oops, I forgot - Josef Fritzl Lad.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:11, Reply)
I'd still do Whigfield

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)
You disgust me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:44, Reply)
But she's LOVELY
I must consult the internet to see if she still has a fan club. It'd be great to have stickers and shit, maybe even a diary, or a vintage 1998 calendar
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:57, Reply)
She's bland and boring.
She looks like 10 million other women out there.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:01, Reply)
YOU SHUT YOUR LYING WHORE MOUTH

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:02, Reply)
Hahaha!
Oops! touched a nerve have I?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:03, Reply)
If I was a mental I'd probably stalk her

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:06, Reply)
so you're stalking her'?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:49, Reply)
lol u dun reed no gud

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:00, Reply)
To be fair
...I'm pretty sure I would too.
(dchurch bah, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:01, Reply)
"Hello I'm Whigfield, and I think Naomi Campbell has gravel fanny disorder."

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:08, Reply)
yay girls
we have breasts and we can play with them anytime we want
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)
I'm having a game of scrabble with mine later.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:45, Reply)
PHWOAR

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:45, Reply)
i think me and my girls are gonna rock out the old skool nintendo later

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:46, Reply)
I like breasts.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:45, Reply)
you'd like them more if you had a pair of your own i bet

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:48, Reply)
*looks down*
Hmmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:52, Reply)
you know i'm right

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:57, Reply)

I'm full of delicious food. Living with gonz finally paid off :P
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:48, Reply)
I still think you could train him up a bit more with one of those clickers.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:50, Reply)

Haha! Maybe ill test it over easter
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 19:56, Reply)
I had venison burgers with various toppings
now I too am full.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:06, Reply)
=D

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:37, Reply)
How is everyone this evening?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:30, Reply)
bored
alright jeff?
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:33, Reply)
I'm cooking some dinner
And I'm thinking of having a beer, the headache I've had all day has gone and I think a beer will make me feel EVEN BETTER.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:35, Reply)
Undoubtedly.
Strangely, diet coke almost always gets rid of my headaches but quite frequently makes my teeth hurt instead.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:39, Reply)
I'm going to have some food first, and then I'll consider the beer option.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:40, Reply)
Sensible.

(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:41, Reply)
Thanks very much.
It's not all beer, beer, beer you know.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:43, Reply)
I am debating going and getting some food
from the co-op. What should I get?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:47, Reply)
Get some Indian snacks, kettle chips and dips various.
Have a carpet picnic.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:50, Reply)
that sounds fun

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:52, Reply)
I had a carpet picnic on Monday
it was ace.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:52, Reply)
so have you got rug burns yet?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:53, Reply)
Hahaha.
No. I'm too vanilla for that kind of thing, sadly.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:53, Reply)
for sex on the carpet? i thought you said he was dirty, sex on the floor barely registers as freak i'm fairly certain

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:55, Reply)
He is dirty
whereas I have had an incredibly dull and chaste sexlife.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:58, Reply)
sometimes that's not such a bad thing
my experiences have proven that men believe I am a true freak
and I am not, I wish I could say mine was dull and chaste, I prefer it that way
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:00, Reply)
It's not.
it's fucking tedious and it gives you feelings of horrendous inadequacy when confronted with someone who has actually had a sexlife and whom you would very much like to impress.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:03, Reply)
no, no, no
you don't want to impress them, they'll think you're a hoe
nothing wrong with experimenting
nothing wrong with letting him teach you things
it's all about getting comfortable with what each person likes
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:04, Reply)
Yeah but he makes me all shy
he's like - so, tell me stuff and I'm all like - no, can't...I dunno...
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:05, Reply)
IMHO
you shouldn't be having sex with someone if you're not comfortable saying what you like
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:15, Reply)
Nah! it takes a while to feel that comfortable with someone.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:16, Reply)
but you'd be willing to have shitty sex and be uncomfortable as opposed to saying what you like?
that's fucking stupid
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:17, Reply)
I'm not talking about shitty sex.
I'm talking about experimenting. You can have perfectly fine sex to start with without hanging off the chandeliers.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:30, Reply)
if it's not what you like then why do it?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:38, Reply)
I agree.
You seem to be missing the point.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:41, Reply)
nevermind, just read below

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:16, Reply)
^this
But never do anything you're just not comfortable with for their sake.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:06, Reply)
Oh no, I wouldn't
but the sad truth is I haven't the first clue about most sexy type things. I wouldn't even know where to start experimenting or what is 'normal' and what isn't.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:08, Reply)
do not concern yourself with normal

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:10, Reply)
horribly cliche
but normal is what makes you feel good.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:10, Reply)
Yeah, I know
but I don't really know what does. It's like: all the basic stuff, yep, I like that...but there's so much stuff I don't even have a clue about.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:13, Reply)
Offers the scientist the 'textbook' solution to her worries.
tiny.cc/tgnj7

*runs*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:23, Reply)
Then, and this is the
best advice EVER, do some research. Find something that makes you think 'ooh I'd quite like to try that.' Then suggest it
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:43, Reply)
Don't sweat it.
Let him lead. Try stuff. Some stuff you won't like and some stuff you will : D
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:13, Reply)
Yes, but he keeps asking me questions I either don't know the answer to
or I'm too shy to say. It's rubbish. I feel like I am being dull and disappointing.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:16, Reply)
Just be honest.
Say I haven't experimented as much as you but I'm willing for you to teach me, (if you're willing that is).

Even at my old age I can still be taught a few tricks.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:20, Reply)
I have done.
I still feel dull and disappointing.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:21, Reply)
Pfft!
If he starts yawning mid coitus then I'd be worried.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:24, Reply)
is he cumming?
he can't be too disappointed.
there's not much to experiment with.
try catching him off guard, going at it in public, or cooking naked
you don't have to be studying the kahma sutra to keep things spicy
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:27, Reply)
Ha, I wander about my flat naked
or semi-naked most of the time. It amuses him. And yes he does, but it always takes a while - although whether this is due to the fact that all the people I've previously slept with were crap, I'm not sure.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:29, Reply)
But you've said in the past that you LIKE
pub quizzes.

Does he say things like, 'I have to take your first answer' or 'I need to hurry you'

Maybe if you answer the questions correctly, you'll win a car.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:20, Reply)
Sod off, Jeff
you're not helping my woeful lack of self-confidence.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:22, Reply)
Lack of self confidence?
You pulled the fit tennis coach. I'd hardly call that lacking in self confidence.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:24, Reply)
Yes, but I am still amazed I actually had the balls to do so
and even more amazed that he said yes and that he apparently likes me too. My flabber is constantly gasted at the whole thing. It's all going to come tumbling down around my ears like the massive disaster it's bound to be. He's far too good for me.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:27, Reply)
It is impossible to love someone who can't love themself.
Enjoy your relationship for what it is, not what it might/might not be or what it might become.

Live for the moment berk. It's all about today.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:30, Reply)
SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
are you TRYING to ruin it for yourself?
for fuck sake woman GET A GRIP

He's just a man, no better or worse than you.
They're not hard to please.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:31, Reply)
The are hard to please in my experience.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:32, Reply)
See this is what pisses me off
he is gorgeous, fun, funny, cheeky, confident, musical...he's pretty much all I've ever wanted in a bloke and I am completely smitten. Ever since we first met for drinks I have been looking for the catch.
Turns out the catch is most likely to be my subconscious screwing me over, and annoying him by being an emotional angst-ridden mess to such a degree that he ditches me.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:38, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1177649
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:42, Reply)
^ this
Ffs berk...

Just enjoy it and relax will ya.

This is simple; boy likes girl and vice versa
(CheatingRabbit, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:55, Reply)
Well you sound less 'meh' than you did earlier.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:56, Reply)
No, I still am
I just don't think it's fair to beaker to you.
(berk, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:59, Reply)
Go on.
It'll make me feel better about my own worries.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:01, Reply)
straight to the point you get

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:54, Reply)
Jedi you not.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:56, Reply)
This actually sounds good
thanks Jeff. I think the co-op has a deal on snacks at the moment
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:57, Reply)
My pleasure Amberl.
Do you have some shit telly to watch this evening?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:59, Reply)
New episode of the Only Way is Essex
and I might download Empire Records
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:10, Reply)
Did you get involved with Babylon the other week?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:11, Reply)
I did!
It was really good. I'm definitely getting more. That reminds me, must reply to your gaz :)
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:36, Reply)
What, the gaz asking what time you were going to the pub LAST SATURDAY?
Tsk.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:37, Reply)
the one before :(
I only got that gaz the next day, and you never turned up!
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:39, Reply)
Well I didn't know what time you were going there!
(Although as it happens, I wouldn't have made it anyway, I was feeling rotten)
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:40, Reply)
5 probably will
or maybe this will
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:41, Reply)
I think the healing properties of beer are greater than that of the giraffe.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:43, Reply)
i'll bet if you listen to some mariah carey you'll feel better
of course when I say listen I mean watch a video of her shimmying around with the sound off
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:48, Reply)
Even with the sound off I think I'd find her annoying.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:51, Reply)
nicki minaj then?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:52, Reply)
Who?
They sound like a lesbian thief.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:54, Reply)
second image may be NSFW
Nicki Minaj
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:58, Reply)
That doesn't light my candle

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:00, Reply)
you wouldn't play the congos on that arse?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:03, Reply)
I'd give 'em a proper Democratic Republicing.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:06, Reply)
And if you get thirsty mid congo-ing.
Drink some Um Bongo.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:07, Reply)
THEY DO NOT DRINK IT IN THE CONGO
AS IT IS UNAVAILABLE THERE. FALSE ADVERTISING MAKES ME ANGRY

/hulks
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:08, Reply)
But the animals make it.
So they must drink it there.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:11, Reply)
no
it is only for export
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:11, Reply)
Um Bongo Export
Is that a bit like a stronger continental lager, only in the case of the 'Bongo, they've just made it a bit sweeter?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:13, Reply)
cutes!

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:48, Reply)
my friend Laura that's just had a baby has all her baby stuffs in giraffe
surprising but mega cute, just because I reckon most people pick pooh or random pink things and all her stuff is brown
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:53, Reply)
when I went to get things for my ex-nephew
it was all about bees
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:56, Reply)
ex nephew?
bees are awesome
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 20:58, Reply)
well he was my nephew when I was married

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:05, Reply)
alright Jeff
Laughing myself silly at this and I'm really not sure why.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:03, Reply)
I'm not sure why either.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:06, Reply)
this
its shite
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:13, Reply)
I tried buying a pinball table on xbox yesterday
WTF MS?
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:13, Reply)
like nectar points
for virgins?
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:14, Reply)
no.
It's a currency not a rewards scheme, so it's money for virgins.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:16, Reply)
Not far to go!

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:38, Reply)
100 points is about a quid

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:46, Reply)
BERK
if he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be with you
obviously he likes you, wants to spend time with you and share the intimacy
so stop stressing, and realise how awesome you are!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:42, Reply)
^this
And on that note I'm away to beddybyes.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:43, Reply)
Night Blousie.
*Waves*

Sweet dreams.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:45, Reply)
Evening all
Berk is lovely and smart and funny and Tennis Coach is lucky to have her.

I'm having an alright evening, just started watching that Game of Thrones thing - interesting so far. I've had venison burgers, a couple of glasses of wine and I might have a whisky in a bit.

Today I arranged to view a city centre flat on Friday, and I've just emailed about a couple more I'd like to view. Exciting times!

All in all a decent evening. How's everyone else?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 21:59, Reply)
I'm feeling better and I'm having a beer.
Although I'm planning on a early night this evening.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:01, Reply)
I could've fancied a venison burger

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:01, Reply)
They were fab
one with mushroom duxelles, garlic sausage and dijon mustard, one with gouda, red pepper and redcurrant jelly.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:07, Reply)
What did you get for dinner in the end?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:10, Reply)
two of the small bags of Doritos
some houmous, and a diet coke. I've had several beers but they're horrible
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:12, Reply)
hello sexy
how are you?

just had the dullllllest evening of property networking... gash.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:15, Reply)
I'm good thanks
how are you, anything good about the evening?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:20, Reply)
erm.....
........ i stopped at marks and spencer for a lazy dinner and just had one of their "lovely vegetables" mushroom pappardelle things. that was the best part of the evening by a country mile.

also my friend just got dumped. ON HOLIDAY. she is stuck in an apartment with him and can't fly home for 3 days... doom!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:24, Reply)
Has he met someone else whilst they are away
Or is he just a grade A cunt?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:26, Reply)
i just got another email, i got it wrong
they are actually back, but he did it on the last night of the holiday.

so now she will be thinking that he didn't want to go on it or be there in the first place. why didn't he have the guts to tell her BEFORE they went, she could have taken a girlfriend instead!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:31, Reply)
Still, it's better than being dumped halfway through and having to try and sleep through a drunken "ugh! ooh! ugh! ooh! ugh! ooh!" every night when they bring someone back in the small hours.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:37, Reply)
this is true
i have more than one mate who got dumped partway through a 6 month lease of a 1 bed flat and had exactly this. niiiiiiiiiiiice.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:41, Reply)
That's awful :(
but excellent news on holiday-booking
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:40, Reply)
yes, i am most excited, could do with some sunshine and doing fuck-all!
poor girl, she's in a bit of a state...

men SUCK!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:42, Reply)
alright Amberl
Does Cowjam look as much like Kenny Everett in real life as he does in those b4sh photos?
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:21, Reply)
alright Woodside
everyone looked normal actually, though I did create my own shadow
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:41, Reply)
how have i not seen these bash pics??

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:44, Reply)
there's not many
and I look horrible. I'll see if I can find them for you

edit: here you are www.flickr.com/photos/rusling/sets/72157626402103663/
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:44, Reply)
ooh well done
who is hatd, she is v pretty.

they are SO NOT horrible of you, you're just not really looking at the camera, is all.

cameras will, however, be banned from the july bash!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:49, Reply)
Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver off /talk :)
God I hate photos. I never know if I am actually that fat or if it's slightly lying
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:52, Reply)

you're not fat! it's just that you see angles in a photo that the mirror does not reveal. like when you hear your own voice on a recording, and you think, holy fuck i sound positively garbled. and retarded.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:53, Reply)
I think it's my arms that dismay me
should've kept the jacket on. It's odd because I actually felt pretty good that night. Maybe that was the ten G&Ts
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:55, Reply)
it's just the angle!
every single person who has met you has said "er, no, she does NOT need to lose weight and she IS stunning"

so deal with that, mo'fo!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:57, Reply)
You need to stop chatting to Stevie Wonder haha

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:58, Reply)
You view Swipes comments with 'superstition'

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:00, Reply)
does he post on here?
that would explain a LOT of keyboard mashing
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:00, Reply)
I realise this'll seem like massive pandering
but you don't look fat. You're well proportioned unlike a lot of people who just look fat.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 0:11, Reply)
Cheers CowJam :)
I'll blame the camera
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 0:17, Reply)
I've contacted pentax support about it
given how unreliable the flash is
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 0:19, Reply)
You look better when you're not blurred.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:53, Reply)
polar opposite of me
the blurrier the photo, the hotter i look.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:56, Reply)
Is that because you start vibrating when you absorb heat?

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:57, Reply)
not quite
i'm just really really ugly.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:01, Reply)
pfft stop with the lies!
Just not true
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:05, Reply)
Damn right, I'm the ugliest bastard here and I don't like being done out of a job.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:08, Reply)
i'll fight you for it
it'll be like a walrus wrestling a hippo.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:12, Reply)
We've never seen a picture so we can't judge
your status must remain hypothetical
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:13, Reply)
i've seen a pic
i THINK. from an old bash. tall and very slim and wearing a stripey jumper and not actually ugly at all, from what i recall.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:16, Reply)
Some bugger apparently got one of me in Manchester, but this could be a lie.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:19, Reply)
i won't post the link
but you can blame [insert /talk user] for putting it on [insert webaddress] - google confirms it's still there!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:23, Reply)
I've got less hair, a redder face and about 5 stone more these days.
Hooray for being able to afford regular meals!
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:26, Reply)
i share your pain
irregular studenty meals = size 10 jeans. sigh.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:32, Reply)
Oh no I was never a student, I really was living just below the breadline.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:34, Reply)
ah
shit, they should have paid you more, that's outrageous.

esp as the breadline gets higher by the day.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:36, Reply)
And especially now it's illegal for employment agencies to dock "jobfinder fees" from already scant wages.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:42, Reply)
Tall, thin and stripey jumper you say....

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:20, Reply)
There's one on my profile, but it's not what I look like every day.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:16, Reply)
I've seen a couple of those photos
but your face isn't usually evident. You don't appear ugly though
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:18, Reply)
It's the most flattering portrayal the internet will see, if I have any say in the matter.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:33, Reply)
yeah but until you control the cameras
ALL THE CAMERAS, you might not get any say!

stupid unflattering cameras.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:34, Reply)
I'd also like to lay claim to the title.
At the summer bash, we could have a milk curdling contest.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:15, Reply)
fuck off and get in the queue
you're far behind me as well.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:16, Reply)
*Appoints Swipe milk monitor*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:17, Reply)
sadly it's all true... every doomladen syllable!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:15, Reply)
I'm well aware
that me contradicting you is pot calling the kettle black, but I am still right
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:19, Reply)
we'll just have to agree to disagree on each other's assessment of... each other
christ, how confusing
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 23:21, Reply)
i love those books
but I've not seen the series yet

I wish he'd get on writing the next book, mind
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:04, Reply)
The interwebs provide
It would be wrong to suggest that searching for Game.of.Thrones.S01E01.HDTV.XviD-FEVER.avi might be productive.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:09, Reply)
perhaps I shall have a little look later

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:16, Reply)
Ha! I've just realised who's playing Robert Baratheon :)

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:22, Reply)
My left eye is sore

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:18, Reply)
you've got another eye, haven't you?
suck it up.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 22:25, Reply)

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