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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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OMG THREADRUSH
Since this isn't links, stompy stomp.

Guess who's back? Back again, etc.

Despite having never actually disappeared properly I felt the need to make a grand entrance. Have I missed anything exciting?

I'm celebrating my first day of being a temporary stay-at-home Kitty by cleaning the fridge. It was gross in there. Tell me how horrifically your Monday morning is going to make me feel better.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:38, 220 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
Fuck off Bert.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:39, Reply)
hey, my sister is only marginally attractive.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:40, Reply)
That really wouldn't stop bert

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:40, Reply)
touche
how can I prove myself? Ask me something only a Kitty would know.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
What do you call it when you're dancing, slip, and bash your unmentionables on the pole?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:44, Reply)
it's a "flange mangle"

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
haha
clam slam, foo foo boo boo, twat splat, gash bash to name a few. MINJURIES!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:51, Reply)
cunt shunt
flap slap
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
Clam slam is the one I was expecting.
100% confirmed as Kitty.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
What does a mouse taste like?
Wait...
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:44, Reply)
nom nom nom

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:51, Reply)
Which kind of 'sammich' does Kitty find to be the most 'nommy'?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:45, Reply)
you don't know the answer to that anyway
but it's brie and cranberry
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
You have a choice of taking a shit in the loo or your dad's slippers
What do you choose?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:46, Reply)
Hahaha!
random
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
My parent's cat likes to shit in my Dad's slippers

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)
stupid cat
everyone knows slippers are for vomiting in
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:05, Reply)
kitties don't poop

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
How much PSI does a fanny have to be able to produce to susspend a 18 stone girl from a poll with a diamita of 5 inches?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
you'd be looking for a vacuum
so a smaller pressure value not a larger. Atmospheric is about 14.7 psi, so, I dunno, about 4 or 5 psi?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:49, Reply)
Fanny science

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)
you wouldn't believe the amount of fanny we get.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:51, Reply)
This is true on so many levels

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
I barely understood this
fatties shouldn't pole dance.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
What present did you bring me yesterday?
And what did I think it was?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:48, Reply)
chocolate
pregnancy test.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
this looks even funnier written down.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
A chocolate pregnancy test, best thing to give a crying girl ever.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:54, Reply)
I don't know many girls who like eating piss-soaked chocolate.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:58, Reply)
livingroomlol

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:03, Reply)
Never seen any videos of it?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:03, Reply)
Y'know what, I don't think I have
I've seen videos of pissing into mouths, and other orifices, but I don't think I've seen someone piss onto food and then eat it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:11, Reply)
NICHE MARKET

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:11, Reply)
I think I could probably sale them online given the right social networking tactics.
Esspecially if they melt a little.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:04, Reply)
not for lack of searching though right?
how are your feet?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:04, Reply)
Completely fine thanks
Ever so slightly raw to the touch, but they haven't swollen up, bled or throbbed. Hand poked tattoos are a lot less traumatic on the skin.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:12, Reply)
excellent stuff
look forward to seeing a pic of the finished article
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:15, Reply)
It won't be for a few months or so
Have to pay off my car, service and MOT next month, and have Japan in August.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:17, Reply)
you colossal bumlord
edit: better?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:28, Reply)
You've done yourself a massive disservice by using that insult.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:33, Reply)
true
wasn't thinking.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:40, Reply)
I forgive you

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:41, Reply)
thanks.
I'm trying to figure out whether the white hot fury I am feeling is entirely because I was forced to drive a Chevrolet Spark this week, or if that has just piled on some other cause...
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:42, Reply)
I ate the chocolate already
But I kept the box because it makes me lol
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:54, Reply)
I might buy you the same chocolate every week
and then buy an actual pregnancy test to see if you'll eat it.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:04, Reply)
Conditioning.
Please don't I'll probably fall for it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:05, Reply)
haha I love conditioning
everytime you fail at a pole move I'm going to ring a bell so that eventually just ringing the bell will give you a sad.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:10, Reply)
You are a terrible person.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:28, Reply)
Ok so far, i had a cheese and ham toasty for my elevensies

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:40, Reply)
Branston pickle in there?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:40, Reply)
It was toasted...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:41, Reply)
I know, I guessed that from the word 'toasty'.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:44, Reply)
No-one wants hot pickle do they?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:45, Reply)
It works well

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:46, Reply)
This man speaks the truth.
After a work night out I had a beautiful blonde (female!) work colleague make me cheese and Branston pitta bread toasties. I can heartily recommend them.

And no, I didn't get into her drawers.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 16 May 2011, 11:49, Reply)
They were pre-cut toasties

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)
..because they were locked, amiright?

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)
They might as well have been...

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
My mum used to make cheese and pickle puff pastry parcels
they were proper nom
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:54, Reply)
OH EM EFF GEE
I was in Sainsbury's on Friday and they sell cheese with branston pickle already mixed into it. It was yum.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:42, Reply)
That sounds amazing!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
OH WOW!!!!!
Oh how I've missed you, Nommers.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:46, Reply)
I've missed you too Monty old chap
every time I listen to music I think "ahh Monty would hate this"
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
I'm suffering from a heavy weekend, am shattered
But I had a fucking superb weekend, so I don't mind too much!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:40, Reply)
secondments fucking sucks.
I've only just remembered about the Virgin Media rickroll though and that has amused me somewhat
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:42, Reply)
I lolled in the lift and people looked at me

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
excellent

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
My monday will be awesome as usuall.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
that's because you're talking to me

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
Yeaaaaaaaahhhh
that's it.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:44, Reply)
as awesome as your spelling?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:43, Reply)
Awesomer

(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:44, Reply)
brilllient

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:45, Reply)
clicks all round chaps

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:46, Reply)
'Bonjour Monsieur le Kettle. Je suis Monsieur Pot. Tu est noir.'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
zing

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
pottt ketell

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:47, Reply)
I'm revising.
And Sydney, our mouse died last night. A raisin was obviously too much temptation for him.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:49, Reply)
I'm very upset that you set traps
If I'd know that yesterday I would have dismantled them when you weren't looking.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
I didn't, my housemate did.
Me and Becca wanted humane ones. I was quite upset.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:01, Reply)
was it the fish neglecting guy as well? He hates nature

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:04, Reply)
No, different one.
The one that's all "Don't mind me, just making some tea. Still making my tea. Stillll stirring. Yep, still going" On a sunday afternoon.
Fish boy seemed pretty pleased about Sydney's tragic incident. Bastard.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:06, Reply)
haha I like extra long tea making guy, he's funny
Fish boy can rot in hell, he made the place smell like burnt toast.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:10, Reply)
That just means you had a stroke.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:12, Reply)
that's just my face

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:20, Reply)
if there's one thing guaranteed to make me not have a stroke
it's your face
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:54, Reply)
thanks dear
you make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:12, Reply)
it's my pleasure

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:14, Reply)
He just makes the place smell full stop.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:20, Reply)
Smashing.
I have several thousand lines of impenetrable greek comedy to learn. Only so many poo jokes I can handle.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)
What's brown and sticky?
A poo
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)
A STICK
HAHAHAHAHAHA IT'S SO FUNNY
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
Yes fuck yes am I seeing you I can't wait.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
Yayayayayyayayayayayayayaya!

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)
I'm trying to work out ORDER of PROCEEDINGS
I dunno if I can be arsed going into Manchester in the day so I might go to Fletcher Moss and we can meet for coffee in Withington? Or something?

We are going to Font though. He's not getting out of that one.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:01, Reply)
When will this be again?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:02, Reply)
Monday that is a bank holiday- 30th?
You still have exams right?
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:19, Reply)
I do, yes
But I'm sure I can spare some time for you bbz
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:21, Reply)
wait...get the fuck off b3ta and revise!

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:36, Reply)
I'm doing both!
Multitasking, innit. I only stayed for your good thread
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:46, Reply)
haha lies

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:12, Reply)
What's Blue and can't sing?
Blue

#LOLOLOLZ
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:58, Reply)
Having mocked you, I ended up having to watch Eurovision
and I got well into it
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:08, Reply)
I enjoyed it,
Europeans are silly.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:12, Reply)
I was sad for Spain
no one likes them. I wanted Sweden to win.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:25, Reply)
it should have been France, Italy or Moldova

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:47, Reply)
Were Moldova the gnome men?
They were awesome.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:55, Reply)
big hats, unicycle and trumpet solos
what more can you ask for?

I think it was Italy that was the guy with the see-through piano, they were actually quite good.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
With you on that
and thought Georgia were ok too - not sure about France although he was a bit tasty...............
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Mon 16 May 2011, 14:40, Reply)
Why did the baker have brown hands?
because he kneaded a poo.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:51, Reply)
that's horrible.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
I like it.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)

kneaded a poo fisted Lampito
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:59, Reply)
that's unpleasant!

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:00, Reply)
:( :( :( :( :(

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:01, Reply)
I'm sorry dear
That's the first thing I thought of when you said you liked it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:02, Reply)
Hence why you have "logged" on here?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:51, Reply)
"If you don't take this bag away from me I'm going to shit myself"
apparently counts as comedy.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
hahahahahahaha ha ha ha h
No, I dont get it
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:53, Reply)
It's even worse.
The original joke is:

μηδ᾽ ὅτι τοσοῦτον ἄχθος ἐπ᾽ ἐμαυτῷ φέρων,
10εἰ μὴ καθαιρήσει τις, ἀποπαρδήσομαι;
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:54, Reply)
hahhahahahahahhahahahahhaa!
NOW I get it
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
Mind

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)
hahahaha
I actually lolled at that.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:56, Reply)
Piss

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)
Ahhh, now I get it.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:56, Reply)
So you're just (pebble)dashing on here then?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:52, Reply)
i went on a hen-do in manchester on sat
that lamarrs bar is literally chock-full of hot guys, isn't it??

i nearly knocked some guy on crutches flying, and my drunken idea of an apology was "sorry, but if i see a cripple, i always have to nail them." he didn't take it in the spirit it was intended.

and my friend had a 6'4 tranny stand on her foot in stilettoes. she has a purple hole in her foot now.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:54, Reply)
Sounds like a standard night in Manchester to me!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:55, Reply)
Is this gonz in disguise?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:56, Reply)
When Gonz dresses as Swipey he's too busy to write anything.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:57, Reply)
*FRANK AND BEANS FRANK AND BEANS*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:02, Reply)
Girlfriend schmirlfriend
Oh I'm not supposed to say that.

I was following a woman (not like that) into my building on Saturday night, she was wearing a really tiny dress and really high heels and I thought to myself "women who dress too sluttily often look like trannies", then when she held the door open for me and I thanked her she said "you're welcome" in a deep voice.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 11:58, Reply)
it was VERY annoying
usually you are talking yourself into fancying someone whilst ignoring the voices that are screaming, "but he's shorter than you" or "but he smokes" or "but he has shit-for-brains" or "but he's ginger" or "but he is wearing THAT shirt" or "but look at his tiny little hands, he's like a goblin"... this one was perfect. sigh.

i don't get massive trannies. clearly you're not going to fool anyone with your dustbin lid hands and your massive adam's apple and your 5 o'clock shadow that sprouts hairily everywhere by lunchtime. why bother?!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:02, Reply)
I thought you were talking directly to me about the massive hands then

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:05, Reply)
why, do you have massive hands??

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:16, Reply)
I can't use touch screen things very well
I tend to mash them. I accidentally poked someone on facebook instead of removing the poke because I hate him.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:18, Reply)
As big as Al's dinnerplates

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:19, Reply)
haha nothing's that big

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:20, Reply)
You could totally use your massive hands for evil
Like holding the world to ransom, saying you'll block out the sun unless they give you one million dollars.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:30, Reply)
I'm going to slap you into next month.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:36, Reply)
That'll solve the issue of how I'm going to feed myself until payday rolls around

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:38, Reply)
Because they feel pretty

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:06, Reply)
but they don't look it
this one was like an unleashed beast marauding around on its stilettoes ruining people's feet!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:16, Reply)
This is true

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:19, Reply)
the same could be said of ugly women though
everyone needs to feel pretty!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:20, Reply)
i still think there has to come a point when these 16 stone rugby players need to look in the mirror
and think, "give it up as a bad job"
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:25, Reply)
Same goes for 16 stone rugby ball shaped women

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:26, Reply)
I could not agree more.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:29, Reply)
yes
this too
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:39, Reply)
:( :(

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:17, Reply)
tldr - gaz us ya tits instead

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:00, Reply)
you are right
edited to make it more readable for lazy arses...!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:05, Reply)
Much better
stupid cripple getting in your way, and turning down full sex with an amply chested minx!
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:07, Reply)
he was actually quite hot
and it was only his foot that was strapped up, so it was clearly a beer-injury of some sort.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:15, Reply)
he probably injured it building a playground for under privileged kids
you bitch.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:19, Reply)
good
let's hope he took a few of the snotty-nosed little organ-donors with him.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:24, Reply)
ha that shocked me a little bit

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:27, Reply)
i am in a snarly feral mood today!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:39, Reply)
*pokes with stick*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:44, Reply)
we should start a club
I'm disproportionately angry today.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:45, Reply)
Have a smoke

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:47, Reply)
not an option

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:48, Reply)
Have a "brownie"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:48, Reply)
racist

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:49, Reply)
I'm not being racist, but I much prefer museli to granola

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:50, Reply)
Oh, you're that one that occasionally laughs at me.
Glad you're back, I've been dying on my arse.

My Monday sucks. Hope that helps.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:17, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHA

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:27, Reply)
Yeah, I meant to say "with".

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:29, Reply)
oh sorry.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA you're so funny.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:32, Reply)
Online internet validation ain't what it used to be.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:35, Reply)
Your face ain't what it used to be.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:44, Reply)
I ran over one of your lot last night
It was about 11 o clock on A dark country road and no obvious houses that it may have come from so I had to throw it in a bush
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:24, Reply)
I hope you're kidding

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:27, Reply)
So do I, it was horrid. Two ran out in front of me dodged one but hit the other.
I feel guilty.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:29, Reply)
not your fault though
poor kitty. I saw a guy on the way to work a bit ago who'd hit one, it was still in the road, he looked proper shaken up. I've hit a pheasant and a bunny before now and my sister hit a squirrel, it's always a bit traumatic
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:31, Reply)
Living out in the sticks it's often unavoidable
And can claim several bunnies and foxies but had never hit a domestic pet before. Kept thinking about some poor kid waking up to only one kittie this morning.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:33, Reply)
teaches kids about loss for the inevitable day when he wakes up to only one parent

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:34, Reply)
I am getting soft in my old age

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:38, Reply)
Had you been drink driving again?
That would explain things
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:47, Reply)
"Mummy ! Mummy ! Kitumz didn't come home last night, I don't know why he didn't come home, does he not like me anymore? Is he never going to come back like daddy? I don't know why I'm so horrible that people keep leaving me"

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:44, Reply)
Is that your latest impression of RogertheStarfish?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:47, Reply)
not enough eating disorder

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:18, Reply)
Someone tell me to go to the gym

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:32, Reply)
I thought this place had got fatter

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:32, Reply)
I have the body of a greek god*



*Bacchus
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:35, Reply)
i just had to get out of bed :(
Worst. Day. Ever.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:32, Reply)
I was thinking of you last night as I read a smoothie recipe book

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:35, Reply)
Oh dear Krizza my Nizza
what's up?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:35, Reply)
Bad luck mate, hope it gets better.
You could listen to n dubz for misguided happies
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:39, Reply)
"I need you" has been stucki in my head all morning

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:47, Reply)
That would put anyon in a bad mood

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:58, Reply)
Afternoon bumders!
I am back from my 'computers for the terrified' course, and am stuffing my fat face before heading off to actually do some fucking work.

What have I missed?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 12:50, Reply)
Vippers is in a bad mood.
Monty is in a good mood but you can't tell.
Applebite should be studying.
Rory never changes.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:51, Reply)
Thank you BFF
you should totally work for a TV magazine on their soap catch-up section.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 12:52, Reply)
Innit!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:54, Reply)
Apparently I had nothing of interest to add today

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:54, Reply)
Suck it up NA.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:55, Reply)

NA DF
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:56, Reply)
Mind
Piss
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
mind piss

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
I thought it was DF that did that?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
pissing mind

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
pissing gayer, more like

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 13:12, Reply)
Bobby killed some cat whilst drink driving again
It'll be a kid next, just mark my words
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:52, Reply)
Are you planning on pushing one in front of his speeding murder car?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:52, Reply)
Off topics resident drink driver needs no help NA

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:58, Reply)
Only if it threatens to tell Daddy what Bobby made him do in breaktime

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 12:53, Reply)
Most teachers like having their ego stroked, that cunt'll be after his little winky and all

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:55, Reply)
Got anyone in mind?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:54, Reply)
It'll be a poor kid, playing on his toy tractor one Sunday morning, bright with the joys and curiosities of the world, until some fat cunt comes swerving round the corner

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 12:57, Reply)
He'll probably throw him in a hedge an' all.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:00, Reply)
It's probably safest if he never 'graduates' from the college of south wales
The man's a clear and present danger to kids
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:02, Reply)
I heard he ate two of them last time he got peckish at about 11am.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:03, Reply)
Be even worse if he's in a car

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 May 2011, 13:12, Reply)
Course he'll be in a car, he can't walk further than a hundred yards on his chubby legs

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:15, Reply)
This is the sort of thing that gives QOTW a bad name
www.b3ta.com/questions/conversationkillers/post1202387#answers-post-1203048
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:06, Reply)
If I gather the willpower I might go back there for a stint soon

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:08, Reply)
Please gather it.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:11, Reply)
Happy Phantom loves me over there
He's made me two badges so far
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:12, Reply)
haha!
I love the second one. That's how I'm going to picture you from now on.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 16 May 2011, 13:13, Reply)

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