good morning OT
On my way to work I see pretty much the same people every day. Thankfully we never speak to each other but we do get used to each others habits and quirks. One lady cannot stand still while waiting for the train and has to do brisk laps of the platform with a determined look on her face. Another guy will not take his eyes off his copy of the metro for anything, not ticket barriers or other passengers or even staircases.

what regular oddballs do you encounter on your day-to-day travels?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 7:58, 138 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Sheep with a death wish.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 7:58, Reply)

if you hit one do you get to strap it to your bonnet?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:20, Reply)

I must enquire about that.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:22, Reply)

Rabbits, frogs and other students generally.
But when I'm at home, cows and cow trucks. And milk trucks. And grain trucks.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:02, Reply)

Rabbits and frogs attend your college?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:25, Reply)

That's not the half of it.
There was a elephant, who sneezed and fell on his knees and as for the monkey... Well, something became of it, but I don't know what.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:27, Reply)

Haha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:38, Reply)

well they live on campus.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:34, Reply)

There's this greasy-haired fat man getting thinner and thinner over the last two years.
Fair play to him.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:10, Reply)

maybe he's got cancer

(Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:14, Reply)

It suits him

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:15, Reply)

I heard he just got off the peg cancer
but then got his oncologist to take it in to fit him.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:19, Reply)

Bravo

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:45, Reply)

haha
one day, Al, one day, you'll let that lie.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:02, Reply)

I've missed something, haven't I?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Al, Ape and I had a debate about approaches to suit purchase.
Al got VERY upset. But only in a standard Al way, obviously.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:06, Reply)

some gets theirs from Primaaark's

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:09, Reply)

I merely pointed out you could get a cheaper off-the-peg suit to look better than a more expensive one
by getting it properly fitted by a tailor, and it would cost much less overall.

I think the juxtaposition of something costing less versus the fact that I actually have a tailor caused some kind of anti-snob recursive loop in Al's brain and in the end it was the tailor he couldn't deal with most, so apparently I was talking shite.

But, like I said, only in an Al way. I've never even considered the fact that he might be being serious about anything.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Good morning Off Topic.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:23, Reply)

Yeah whatever Jeff. What. Ever.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:26, Reply)

Did you fall out of the wrong side of the bed this morning Monty?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:28, Reply)

Nah I'm just playing, yeah?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:31, Reply)

If you say so.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:32, Reply)

None, sorry.
There's a pretty mixed-race woman who I see at the bus stop each morning, we smile at each other. That's it I'm afraid.

Often when I'm walking down to the tube in the evening, there's a tall woman with a really fucking weird, lumpy body shape walking down ahead of me. If you're reading this, love, jogging bottoms are simply not for you. You look at best like you have a bag of baking potatoes stuffed down the back of them, and at worst that you have taken a frankly alarming dump in your pants.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:24, Reply)

Ohhhhh how convienent.
I bet this pretty woman just happens to be going to work at the same time as you.

I am watching you Boycie.
( wanderlust, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:46, Reply)

watching stalking
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:15, Reply)

She's pretty mixed-race?
Like, maybe 4 or 5 different races?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:11, Reply)

She's 27% paris-dakar and 13% London marathon.
She's not sure about the others, her gran was a bit of a drinker.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:44, Reply)

What am I talking about?
How I can have forgotten about Horace I don't know.

Horace is a fairly large black chappie with a Sainsbury's fetish. He has the mental capacity of a child and I first saw him in Sainsbury's when I lived in Camden (15 or so years back). He asks women for a kiss and bellows 'THE BEST OF LUCK' every few minutes. He smells of off milk, carries a knackered wheeled granny's shopping trolley and wears a thick coat in all weathers. He is proper menkle, yeah?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:29, Reply)

It's a shame he doesn't shout 'Where ya goin' now?' in a Geordie accent.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:30, Reply)

It truly is.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:31, Reply)

sounds like a guy I met on a bus a few years back
he spent the journey giving me the lowdown on where you could still hear a decent mass said in latin "because it's just not the same since they switched to the vernacular".
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:33, Reply)

that sounds more like Monty

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:15, Reply)

He lives in Finchley now
He's a well known "character"
(Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Fuck, I remember him from Camden back then!
Or, at least, in the hazy memories of what's left of back then.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:08, Reply)

My line manager and I are rather strange
We have knowledge of stupid trivia, and pop culture that doesn't anything to do with anything. It's good fun for irritating others in the office, but I'm aware we just look like anoraks.

And to save the inevitable strikethrough - anoraks helmets

And there's a few resident mentals round here, there's 'Sexy' Nick, and while he has learning difficulties, and is very loud, and in your face, is absolutely harmless and a nice enough lad.

The opposite can be said of another guy who drinks in the same pub. He's not there mentally, and is loud, brash, and aggressive. And that's before he starts drinking, when he becomes ten times worse.

Then, my personal favourite, we have a woman named Margaret, who is fantastically mental. When she's in a pub playing music, she doesn't dance, she simply rhythmically walks. Add to that, when she's in Tesco, once she's finished her shopping, she'll stand by the tills for about 5 minutes, and sing for the staff. Magnificently hatstand.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:32, Reply)

strikethrough fail

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:38, Reply)

*whistles*

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:39, Reply)

*Only buggin'.*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:41, Reply)

Morning all
Not current, but many years back when I used to drop my girlfriend off at college in Leamington there used to be a guy who would wait next to the crossing lady by the roundabout. He would wave to all the kids on their way to school and would usually be sporting some kind of headgear - a children's police helmet, a colourful wig, or his clear favourite of viking helmet (green plaits optional).
Always used to cheer me up...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:37, Reply)

Oh man, you have just reminded me
There is a woman I see sometime walking towards the centre of Newcastle who sports a rather fetching combination of coat and insane hat. The best way I can describe it is like a swimming cap with attached "Star Trek" visor, but across the back, rather than the eyes. I didn't watch Star Trek but there is a black bloke on it with a funny eye visor thing. Like that, in turquoise and purple. Menkle
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:14, Reply)

It might look odd
But it prevents *them* from being able to read her thoughts
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:15, Reply)

I think this is the look she is going for.
I'm going to try and get a photo next time
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Not so many people
The problem with cycling is you rarely keep pace with anyone else so there don't seem to be any regular, or not on my route anyway.

On a side note, can it be considered stalking if you stay behind someone (either by failing to overtake or by trying to keep up) for a mile or two purely because they have a nice arse? It's not like I would go out of my way or anything...
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:44, Reply)

I dunno about stalking
it's pretty poor form from a cycling point of view as you are hitching an easy ride.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:04, Reply)

Technically
But I'll always be behind someone, it's rush hour in London, and I'm sure they in turn were 'hitching a ride' from whoever was in front of them. I'd argue that that particular bit of etiquette does not apply in this particular circumstance.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:12, Reply)

that's true I suppose

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:13, Reply)

Of course it is
Everything I say is 100% true, and often quite wise. /straight face.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:14, Reply)

poor welsh people and loads of chavs

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:47, Reply)

None
due to be safely cocooned in a ton-and-a-half of metal, plastic and leather.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:03, Reply)

Leather? Bloody hell, what do YOU drive?

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Joan Jett

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:27, Reply)

I said What, not Who, dear.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:27, Reply)

Pete Townsend
I dont think I'm doing this right
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:36, Reply)

No. You're not.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:37, Reply)

not unless you're just doing it for "research"

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:42, Reply)

Yes,,,,,errr,,,,, research, thats it

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:51, Reply)

erm, currently a Saab
I'm pretty sure having parts of cars made of cow isn't that uncommon, is it?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:42, Reply)

She's an Australian, she'll drive a "Ute"
She'll be lucky if it has carpets, let alone cowhide.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:44, Reply)

I don't like not having seats of cow
mmm. cow.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Me either.
wipe clean, innit.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Cow = exceedingly hot seats in summer

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:48, Reply)

I don't find they're hotter than any other part of the car.
unless you're in shorts. Grown men in shorts = twat.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:49, Reply)

Summer is acceptable for wearing shorts

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Yes
Yes she is
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Not if you're a grown man.
I expect you wear sandals, too. Probably with socks. White ones.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

I saw a fantastic thing recently
An elder gent, with a moustache and a combover, wearing a tweed jacket and shorts, with sandals and socks, smoking a pipe while reading the paper with a pint of ale.

It was so magnificently English.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

I'll grudgingly accept that.
But I bet he's mean to cats, the short-wearing twat.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:57, Reply)

That's because they fucking deserve it.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:58, Reply)

*puts AA on The List*

( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:59, Reply)

I'm highly allergic to cats, and they fucking know it
And insist on rubbing along my legs, the little bastards.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:03, Reply)

I'm fairly sure that attributing human motives
to lesser life forms is a symptom of mania.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:05, Reply)

but not so short that they'll ride up enough
to burn the back of your thighs when you sit on a hot leather carseat.

That's shorty shorts territory.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:54, Reply)

Of course, all shorts are entirely heatproof

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:05, Reply)

most are fine
but if you plump for tight black leather or pvc then good luck to you.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:10, Reply)

not really
it's more about colour than anything else. If you sit down in speedos then, yeah, you might get a bit hot. but then you're a tool. I don't possess any shorts that are short enough to allow my thighs to contact car seat.

Also - I live in Scotland. That pretty much eliminates the problem.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:57, Reply)

It's clear to me that sportscow favours
the Boris Becker style eighties sports short.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:58, Reply)

the bollock-splitters
as they are known.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:00, Reply)

Male camel-toe
what's it called? Moose hoof? He has one of those.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:01, Reply)

If you aren't careful I'll post pics

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:04, Reply)

My fave car my Dad had was a brand spanking new Sarb 900 turbo.
It had seats that heat up ! it was amazing, your bum was so cozy, best car EVER.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:04, Reply)

My old car had these

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:05, Reply)

4.bp.blogspot.com/_EDt4oEItrYA/SiRSUS1k7yI/AAAAAAAAANA/-4RAUX_VPrQ/s1600-h/Seatwarmer.png
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:23, Reply)

Morning kids
I live in Norwich, so my walk to work in the morning involves encountering all manner of web-fingered oddballs. The city has a surprisingly high number of highly attractive women who are more than eager to dress skimpily in the summer months, so sunny weather makes for a happy start to the day.

Hope you're all well.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:08, Reply)

wo
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Good to see nothing has changed in my absence

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Where have you been Darth?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Had a long weekend break at Potters Leisure Resort out on the coast
Populated almost entirely by old people. Had dance workshops and demonstrations by professionals off Strictly. Was awesome :-)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:16, Reply)

I saw your photo!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Ola Jordan is absolutely fucking gorgeous

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Ola +Dave

Sorry
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Would've been better if you'd said James
as I met him too. He kissed me on the cheek.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:24, Reply)

+arse

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Perv
When we met them properly I shook hands with James and Ola and they both gave Ms Foxtrot a kiss on each cheek, so obviously I was like "where's mine?"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:29, Reply)

I agree with this statement
She looks like a Bond girl!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:23, Reply)

I was trying not to get my hopes up before I met her
you know, in case she looks better on TV, smoke and mirrors, etc. She doesn't. She's that fit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:27, Reply)

I met one of my girlfriends on the train to work.
I used to see her every morning and we got to smiling at each other and saying hello, etc. Then I met her in a pub and we ended up seeing each other for about a year.

There are many people from our estate who get the Metro to work so I normally see them. However, there is a simply breathtaking woman who gets the Metro sometimes. I swear to God, every bloke (and most likely a few women) are standing on their tongues when she walks down onto the platform.

Conversely, there is also a woman who has the biggest ears I have ever seen. This fills me with glee for no apparent reason
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Make sure you don't comment on them, even under your breath
Those things can pick up a pin dropping at 100 feet!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:18, Reply)

This^
It is a shame really, as otherwise she is quite attractive.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Use them for leverage?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:34, Reply)

BJ handles

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:35, Reply)

Seriously Woh'ing here....
Today is the first day this year I've woken up and I was fine, no pain or stomach problems or anything. I'm at work more or less on time and I haven't taken any pain killers yet.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:22, Reply)

I like this
Good man
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:22, Reply)

that's really good to hear.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Good stuff!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Woo!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:33, Reply)

Excellent!

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:40, Reply)

I FEEL TERRIBLE

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:42, Reply)

Hungover?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Yes
very
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:46, Reply)

Not good
Why such a heavy Monday?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Tell me why

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Shut it, Brenda.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brenda_Ann_Spencer
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

I feel duly informed now

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Munchausen's

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:54, Reply)

You are Terry Gilliam AICMFP

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Se Barony

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:15, Reply)

haha, gutted.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:06, Reply)

I don't touch public transport
I sit on leather and alone. Occasionally I get cross at other metal boxes, but they're just other metal boxes, they can't hurt me. Sometimes other metal boxes get really angry at me, so I follow them home, to make a point.

But nobody gets hurt, they're just boxes.

Edit: I fell in love on a train once. One of those women you just see the once. Absolutely gorgeous, she was. I didn't approach her though because a) I'm soft as shite and b) it was London. You don't talk to people in London unless you're mental. I didn't want her to think I was mental.
( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:37, Reply)

Or James Blunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:47, Reply)

I don't see anyone attractive on the way to work but then I work in Burnley so nuff said.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:47, Reply)

You just need to look in the mirror Blousie

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Aw! *blushes*

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Youz gawjus

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

I'd do anything for youuuuuu

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:54, Reply)

A coffee will do for a start

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Not you.
BGB.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Give over!
*punches shoulder*
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:55, Reply)

I'm on a big up day today

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

I have noticed : )

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Despite my Metro to work being "fucking shite" again, I'm in a really good mood
I hope it continues
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:04, Reply)

does the headmaster count?
he is like a Welsh Danny De Vito.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Clean freak on the train.
On the way into Waterloo last week I was sat down, the train was full, and people were standing. I was disturbed from my morning reverie by the crinkling sound of paper. What moron is doing this so very close to my left ear, I wondered?

I realised that the woman stood next to me, who had hold of the grip attached to my seat, had decided I was one of the world's unclean, and was therefore gripping using a piece of paper to avoid touching whatever bacterial or viral filth she so obviously perceived about my person.

This worried me a little - I mean, I'd showered and only stuck a bit of gel on the barnet so as not to look like the third Chuckle Brother. Some of you have met me. Just how filthy do I look?
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:15, Reply)

Surely you mean
Just how filthy do I look to you?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Maybe she was one of those people with a phobia of pathogens.

(888777555, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:22, Reply)

Good morning, Rainier.

( Kroney, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 10:24, Reply)