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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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So. Work? So do you have a job or a vocation? Are nurses sexy?
Should tube drivers earn £66k a year?
My bum's warm.
Stop staring at my crotch!!
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:28, 211 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
Nurses can be very sexy. The one I went out with for 4 years certainly was.Then I found her in bed with a french bloke. Bad enough she was cheating on me but the fact it was with someone French made it even worse.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:34,
Reply)
Nurses are filthy. Truefact!I've known a few, not in the biblical sense though.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:36,
Reply)
I am so sorry. French bastard. Did he look like Renee out of Allo Allo?
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:39, Reply)
Or Renee out of Renee and Renato?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:40,
Reply)
Shame she couldn't 'save her love' til Battered got home, eh?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:42,
Reply)
Nah. More like this.
not really. He was a good looking cunt. The cunt.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:42,
Reply)
Worryingly so.His raised eyebrow makes me worry about the fate of those baguettes...
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:46, Reply)
Did you catch him sticking his massive French penis inside your bird? (, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:43, Reply)
NoHe caught his bird sticking her penis in the frenchman
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:51,
Reply)
I have AIDS, if that counts?I went out with a nurse as a teenager. She once picked me up after she'd finished work, in her 'sexy' nurse outfit, covered in - and stinking of - old man's shit. PHWOARRRRR.
Should they bollocks.
You have crapped yourself. Again.
I can't help it. I've never seen poo/spunk stains like those before. They are almost hypnotic.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:35,
Reply)
I went out with a trainee doctor who was half frenchShe left scars
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:36,
Reply)
PhysicalRight down my back
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:38,
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No, silly,she left a box of Henri Wintermans on the night stand.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:38,
Reply)
SHE CERTAINLY FUCKING DID, THE DIRTY FRENCH COW.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:42,
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FUCK YEAH.SHE THOUGHT THEY WERE 'GREAT'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:44,
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I'm in an office with about 40 nurses at the moment no.My vocation is to mine landfills, probably using robots with some sort of swarm based intelligence.
Yes, they should get whatever they can.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:37, Reply)
No they're hisor something
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:39,
Reply)
urban miningChompy has taken a Quintin-esq obsession with it
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:39,
Reply)
I'm 100% with you on this.It really is the future.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:41,
Reply)
Was that you I heard going through my bins last night?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:42,
Reply)
They're doing it already in some placeswww.youtube.com/watch?v=3ICVoyT5uy0
I just see that as a whole bunch of money.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:44, Reply)
Yep, for the scrap metals, and maybe the plastics.Then burn any of the organics to create electricity sell the scrap, clean it up a bit then sell the land.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:40, Reply)
Good ideaLeaves and sticks are easily recycled
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:49,
Reply)
I teach children about woodwork and waterproof trousers.(
Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:37,
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And Sinclair C5 maintenance.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:39,
Reply)
It pays the bills, I wouldn't choose to spend my days here.The idea of sexy nurses is nice, but the reality is that most of them are as fat and ugly as the rest of the population.
No, tube drivers should not earn that amount. They should give it to me.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:37,
Reply)
It does get my goat. I heard one of their poorly educated members trying to justify his wages on Newsnight.
He compared himself to a airline pilot. Silly cunt.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:41, Reply)
Ship in a load of Poles prepared to do it for minimum wage.That'll teach 'em, eh?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:43,
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Just mechanise it. When they do, half the houses in Epping will go up for sale.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:45, Reply)
Self employed stuff, doesn't feel like a job.Employed stuff, I'd happily hit the cunts with a frying pan.
In Carry On movies, usually; even Hattie Jacques has a certain "why not" appeal.
No.
That's nice.
I'm not.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:41, Reply)
Hattie Jacques was apparently a right goer.(
Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:44,
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"Let's go and jump up and down on a couple of fat whores"Name the book and I'll send you seven british pence.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:51,
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That's worth fourteen pence at least. What's your paypal?(
Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:10,
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I have work, probably not a vocation though. yes they are sexy, it's about power innit.
No, fat fucks should be replaced with computer driven trains asap.
my bum is, therefore I am.
I would but i can see your growler from here
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:41,
Reply)
My job is shit but to be honest I get away with murder and it's very well paid.A woman of my age and lack of talent should not complain.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:42,
Reply)
Tubedriver salary is £46k with a pay deal that'll raise it to about £50kAre you some sort of filthy communist?
I can't see your crotch for all those moths.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:43,
Reply)
One of the papers did a reviewof their wages. 66k was based on 42k basic, pension, bonus and 2 free 1-6 zone passes.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:48, Reply)
Sweet.That Bob Crow must have truly massive balls.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:49,
Reply)
I have stood next to him at the pisser. He does. They are fucking massive.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:52, Reply)
Relative to your ball bearings?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:53,
Reply)
Bob crow is a cock, a big fat cock, the biggest damned cock in the whole wide world.If ever there was a cock, bob crow would be that cock, fucking up london for all the boys and girls !
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:58,
Reply)
He isn't the mayor.His job is to get as cushy a deal as possible for his members. By that measure, he's fucking superman.
And I mean he's literally fucking superman. He's got the man of steel bent over a TFL bus shelter and is hammering his Kryptonian ring with all his mighty might.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
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Poor old Superman.Imagine that red-faced, piggy-eyed cunt doing you up the soil pipe.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:16,
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That is fucking ridiculous!And as you know I don't usually use bad language.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:50,
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I know. It's not even like you need to know where you are going.
Accelerate when it's dark. Apply the brake when it gets suddenly light.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:54, Reply)
I had to explain to my mrs that train driver don't use a steering wheel to steer the train along the tracks.Bless her. She's far better qualified than me, yet appears to know nothing.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:56,
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Ahhhh bless!I guess she must be nice to look at though.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:58,
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She'd rather fuck a Frenchman(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:23,
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She told me she has. Like Zulus"Thousands of 'em"
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:30,
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*something about them shooting in the whites of her eyes*(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:50,
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It's the deal their union has reached with their employers.Seems odd to get worked up about a mutually agreed package.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:54,
Reply)
Then their employers are idiots.Can I get worked up about idiots?
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:55,
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Their employers are a corporation subsidised and indirectly governed by Londoners.So you're basically saying that cockneys are idiots. You terrible racist.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:58,
Reply)
I fucking hate cockneys with their cheeky grins and ridiculous fancy clothing splattered with a million buttons.(
girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:00,
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Porkie pies knees up the apples and pairs strike a light mary poppins lovely jubbly awright.I'm bi-fucking-lingual, me.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:05,
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Evening everybodypeeps. Is Stavros innit.(
Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
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Only worked up because I have an annual season ticket. I am allowed to complain, it's my democratic right. As it is theirs to withdraw labour whenever the mood takes them.
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:56, Reply)
That's fair enough.London has a public transport system that's about as good as most major European cities and costs three times as much. You muppets.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:09,
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That's because it is ancient and can't be shut down for any real length of time for a complete overhaul(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:14,
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Unlike every other underground system in the world.Mnnnng.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:18,
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I think you're implying that London is unique in not being able to be shut down.But it is unusual, a lot of other subway systems have dual rail setups so they can close down an entire set of tunnels for inspection while the service still operates.
This is is why the New York subways runs 24 hours a day.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:20,
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If you get stuck between stations in NYyou can sometimes see 1970s graffiti. I get very excited by this, because I am a twat.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:23,
Reply)
This sounds like something I could learn all about on The Internet.If my life were crushingly tedious and pointless.
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Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:34,
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Nah, you'd never find that information on the internet.You can only get it by talking to other people.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:35,
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If only I knew some crushingly tedious and pointless people in Real Life.(
Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:51,
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If you don't know a crushingly tedious and pointless person, then it's you.(
Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:57,
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i fucking hate the tubei might feel less strongly if i didn't have to use the district line, mind.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:14,
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Bank holidays, a friend's birthday, nice weather etc(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:15,
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gross incompetence that could have killed many, many peoplebecause someone is too dumb to know their left button from their right button.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:17,
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This is easily the best job I've ever hadbut that says much more about my employment history than anything else.
As regards tube drivers, if it was fair for that sort of remuneration to be applied to sit there for a bumpy ride occasionally pushing buttons, etc etc laboured gay metaphor GIVE ME ALL THE MONEY
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:46, Reply)
where oh where is st mmps patron saint of the poor misunderstood tube drivers?
it's up to london underground what it pays them. but do i believe that the job warrants that kind of skill? hell no.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:02,
Reply)
As you passionately believe that it's entirely up to the company to determine what it's employees are worththen your opinion as to whether or not you think their employees are worth that much is entirely worthless.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:14,
Reply)
of course my opinion is worthless to themi'm just one of the poor sods who has to pay them MOAR MONEY every year despite the fact that there is no improvement in the service.
much like your grammar. please go and read up on the use of apostrophes and then report back, kthx.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:15,
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Oh man, that was so cutting. I can't believe you totally pwned my grammar.She's over eighty you know.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:17,
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then she should have learned the difference between "it's" and "its" by now(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:18,
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Work, eh?I wouldn't fucking know.
Nurses? Are they any more sexy than everyone else? Must be a uniform thing.
Tube drivers may only be going forward and backward on rails, but they're doing it underground in the dark, they have to put up with 'the public' and are responsible for the safety of their passengers all day. They should get whatever train drivers & pilots get.
Leave your nether regions out of this, you massive pervert.
In other news, I'm back and I done good. I think.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:59,
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Don't they just press buttons and read dashboards that tell them when it's ok to stop and go?As for responsible for passengers safety!
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:02,
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You are right. They press 'stop' and 'start' buttons for a living.Plus they DON'T deal with the public other than over the intercom.
Compared with bus drivers they do shit all for almost twice the money. The sooner it's automated the better. The fucking greedy, blackmailing cunts.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:11,
Reply)
i hate the way they inevitably time their announcementsso that you can't hear a word over what's going on outside or the automated announcements. this also applies to the station lot.
URGENT, URGENT ANNOUNCEMENT. WHICH WE ARE GOING TO TELL YOU JUST AS THIS TRAIN RUMBLES THROUGH THE STATION AND DROWNS OUT THE LOT.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:16,
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It is almost lunch, so this should be fine.A colleague took it at Braknell a few minutes ago.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:01,
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I'm sure I saw one of those on fb this morning taht was in Croydon.Methinks Waitrose are taking the piss now.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:02,
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You've NO IDEA how often I hear this.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:14,
Reply)
I think you're forgetting that we know your girlfriend.We can check, you know. We have the power.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:17,
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I for one am willing to check myself.As an un-biased member of this board.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:19,
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Good idea. I think an independent inquiry is probably best.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:22,
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It is Monty's unbiased member that started this talk(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:59,
Reply)
Feel free.She'll be back online later, once she gets back from the hospital where she's been since our last 'encounter'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:19,
Reply)
Is that your husband's dentist?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:21,
Reply)
hahahaha!PROPER officelol
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:59,
Reply)
See? I told you that you had NO IDEA.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:21,
Reply)
There are pictures of Waitroses like this all over the web today. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:03,
Reply)
I'm going to sit on the bastard when he gets back to the office.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:05,
Reply)
They've obviously forgotten all their shops have those kind of frames.Saying that, I think ours has big plain glass windows. I'll have to go there today and look.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
I work in an office, for a company that makes plastic cards.I was shagging a nurse for a good few months when I was younger, she was filthy, and always up for it, it was great. I am most envious of her new fella.
No fucking chance do they.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
www.puppetsbypost.com/image/products/large/Nurse_Hand_Puppet-pc003905-1L.JPG.jpg
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:09,
Reply)
Yeah, look at that filthy bitchCould take my whole hand without even having to lube it up first. Phwoar!
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:10,
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A job, definitely.Nurses I've met have all bee large middle aged Affrican women, so yes, sexy.
I assume if tube drivers actually do earn 66k then that's how much you have to pay them to do the job, so yes.
Glad to hear it, better than cold.
I'm sorry, just not seen one that small ebfore.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:07,
Reply)
I assume if bankers actually do earn £10m then that's how much you have to pay them to do the job, so yes.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:08,
Reply)
Interesting article about how much Stephen Hester is worthwww.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jan/23/stephen-hester-payout-bad-for-taxpayer?INTCMP=SRCH
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:13,
Reply)
Same in both cases, saddlyIf you can get someone cheaper to do it then please do. 66k for a horrible job is rather less silly than 10M for a cushy one though.
What I find sillier is that they never seem to get fired for fucking up.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:20,
Reply)
I'd be interested to see the total tube driver wage bill and how what percentage of a ticket is related to it(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:08,
Reply)
Christ. You must be unbelievably fucking dull even for this place.(
Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:10,
Reply)
oh piss off i was answering the questionyou're the one who likes to run long drawn out trolling arguments with people when you are RIGHT ON THE INTERNET
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
I read that as zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
hahahahaI almost didn't post it, biut couldn't be bothered to rewrite, wuv oo really shammykins
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:15,
Reply)
This is the most correct thing I have ever read.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
Wait till I get dumped again.You won't know what's hit you.
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
The Who's beakering hit single.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:20,
Reply)
You're used to things going into dark tunnels, aren't you.That was a joke about bumming, in case you missed it.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
I'll help1: push this button
2: push that button
3: strike
4: ???????
5: PROFIT
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
I would ask why people who think the pay is out of order don't do this.it's near twice what I earn, but still I'd not spend my working life underground, even for that money, but maybe that's just me.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:33,
Reply)
As with a lot of thingsThe idea of nurses is far sexier than the reality.
That said, as has been mentioned, the Uni I went to had a student nursing dept. If you stayed on over summer they all had some sort of convention. You would have to be the ugliest bloke on the planet not to get your whistle wet*
*didnt get whistle wet*
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:26, Reply)
i have a vocation, too stupid for a jobnurses are sexy yeah, i saw this thing on more4 really late the other night and this noice nurse had to tend to a convicted paedophile who kept putting his poo on the windowsills
and her boyfriends was a fat waste of space who didn't want to marry her, i'd have maried her
alt yes they should, i wouldn't want to spend hours underground working evenings and weekends and bank holidays
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:35, Reply)
I have two jobs.Al would have you believe that one of those jobs involves selling meats and cheeses at a deli counter and the other involves being jizzed at. In the eyes.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:41,
Reply)
I don't believe the second thing.That's not a job, it's just what she does at the weekend. The first thing is true.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:45,
Reply)
No they aren't.That's just what capitalists would have you believe.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:50,
Reply)
I'd like to introduce you to my band, Sexual Chocolate(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:52,
Reply)
Amen! Yes, sir! Can I get an "Amen"? Ha! Ha! I don't know you what you come to do, but *I* come to praise the name! Lord, Lord!
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:04,
Reply)
this strikethrough was brought to you by the 1980's
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:11,
Reply)
Are you not a Librarian?A proud profession.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:46,
Reply)
Tenuously related...I met up with some old flatmates last night who've since become (behold my tenuous link) doctors. They now live on a nice quiet residential road, and told me they'd recently received a letter from a neighbour
concerned about the noise from a house full of young people further down the road. Said letter encouraged the street to complain to the council about this noise, and finished by warning fellow residents that they "may wish to talk to this household personally but, youth being what it is today, one or more of them may be carrying a knife."
(, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 13:58, Reply)
I can't do a Coming To America quote for this :((
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:00,
Reply)
Prince Akeem: Good morning, my neighbours!
Voice: Hey, fuck you!
Prince Akeem: [genuinely happy] Yes, yes! Fuck you too!
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:03,
Reply)
Talking of work.......I've only gone and done a bit.
Now where we? Oh yes............*stares at Stunned's crotch*
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girlinthehole, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:04,
Reply)
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