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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Well, that's me fucked then.Good morning my internet chums. It would seem I am 'under consideration' for redudndancy, which is all the more fun for being unexpected. Due to this I will likely not be on here as much for a while, or maybe a whole lot more, depends how sensible I am. Anyway, if you know of any jobs going in IT, tech support, software testing, interactive television or computer or bicycle repair in or around London, please gaz me.
Actually, fuck it, any jobs going, not fussy, or at leats I won't be in another month or so.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:13,
152 replies,
latest was 14 years ago)
Sorry to hear that, Quey.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:17,
Reply)
sad times.Is it everyone in the company under consideration?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:17,
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as I understand it, just 18 of us.In other words I'm gone unless I can either convince then they can't live without me or that, maybe I can do ther work. Chances are, I'm gone.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:35,
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yeah, but how many of the 18 are going to go?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:42,
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Also, I'm guessing you don't want a job in Edinburgh?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:44,
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I think Roota has dibs on them all at the moment.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:51,
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Morning.That sucks. At least mine was voluntary and I got out at the right time - I just found out last week that the role I performed in the team is being farmed out to the two local authorities in the area, which points to my old post becoming redundant as I suspected it may do. So while being unemployed is crap, at least I left with a bigger payout that has enabled me to pay off debts.
Good luck with finding something quickly.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:20,
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That's well bent. Unlucky old boy.My brother's been 'under consideration' pretty much constantly for the past two years, and it has ruined his life. I suggest you fuck off quick-smart and start making yourself look indispensable.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:33,
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Also, nick your client contact list asap(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:35,
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And leave a dirty protest somewhere out of sight.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:37,
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I'll know by the 17th one way of the otherBut unless I can convince then, I'm gone. I will be surprised if I can avoid this TBH.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:37,
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In which case do fuck all work and instead spend your time looking for something new, eh?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:40,
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Also:Steal anything not nailed down today, then bring in a crowbar for the rest tomorrow
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:41,
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I thought you were a Mackem, not a Scouser?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:43,
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You could make sure all your lovely complicated scripts have been emailed off somewhere safealong with useful guides, etc.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:47,
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Whilst the sage words of the athletic bovineare sage indeed, I'm contractually obliged to point out that just doing your job, being polite, and accepting they wouldn't be making people redundant if they didn't have to, is probably the best way of getting a cracking reference and therefore another job.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:45,
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then once you have a reference, shit in the water cooler. and the kettle.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:46,
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We deal with a lot of councils and housing associations in and around LondonI'll keep an eye out for any techy jobs going for you
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:40,
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I just saw that on the other place.That sucks donkey balls, mate. I would suggest setting aside two days for major self pity, then get down to updating your CV. Jeff was a huge help to me in that department.
Or you could hook up with Gonz and start a super IT company.
In the meantime, I'm sure you understand if we all want to laugh and point.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:47,
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This post ^ sums up b3ta perfectlyUseful advice, then pisstaking
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:49,
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Prepare for the worst. How long have you been there, would you get a nice bit of bunce out of it?If I were you I wouldn't bother trying to convince them you are invaluable, chances are they've already made up their minds who's going and this is the legal notice period. Make finding something else your priority so you can walk out with your payout and straight into something else.
Rough news, mate.
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Kroney, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:49,
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What? Just running with your idea.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 9:57,
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My daugher carefully presented me with a shit she had done in her pants at the weekendCarefully carrying it downstairs in her hands
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:01,
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brings a tear to your eye.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:02,
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And people are constantly surprised that I don't want one of these hell spawn(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:04,
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It was like a little Malteser(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:05,
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shit, scissors, syphilis.It's all about the not running with the esses.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:01,
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Hey homes! Why you so down on us Chicanos, man?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:15,
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i followed your advice and bought a fancy digital "clinically approved" bp monitorit has told me 3 times so far that i am right back down at the low end of normal.
if i'd bought it from tesco, i would have suspected a marketing scam. as it is, i now suspect a crap pharmacist or tesco just stresses me out because it's full of plebs.
either way, good advice. thank you badge.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:15,
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The price of oil per barrel can be easily obtained from the BBC website(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:16,
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It's told you 3 times so far that you are Nakers?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:20,
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perhaps you have blue-and-white coat syndrome?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:22,
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No, it doesn't match her handbag(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:22,
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actuallytoday's handbag is a tasteful shade of patent nude. it goes with anything.
you are not stalking me hard enough.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:27,
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"patent nude"What the shuddering fuck?
How many people do you know who are mirror-level-shiny when they're naked? actually, don't answer that.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:32,
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goddammit he sent me a pic of his arms after the gym last night.
why? why?!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:35,
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Makes a change from a cock gaz?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:37,
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truethe last one of those i got was from quentin.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:44,
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i was calling you a cock, deardo TRY to keep up, at least with the other retards at the back of the class
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:59,
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tesco value syndrome?quite possibly.
shudder.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:28,
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Oh, good, somebody go itI was thinking I was wasted here. Again.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:30,
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you and i have always been on that different level, darling(
rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:35,
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Quite so. Quite so.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:40,
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well actually my level is a bit more advanced than yoursbut you do well to keep trying. you do a good job.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:45,
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well, of course.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:58,
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wowyou never give in that easily. what do you want?!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 11:00,
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There is light at the end of the tunnelRedundancy is a bummer - update your CV and get onto jobsite pronto. If there's a payout, work out how long it'll last if you live at 'economy rate' and stick to the budget! I had a payout which would've lasted me 6 months at normal expenditure rates, by living a bit frugally I now have quite a bit of it left after 5 months and I start a new job tomorrow.
There is work out there for qualified, experienced people, don't despair!
Best of luck to you.
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:04, Reply)
Also, if you end up redundantYou can spend more time cooking hearty stuff with cheaper ingredients.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:06,
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Bad luck old chum.Only jobs going at ours is Senior Developers and Magento Developers. I'll keep my ears open though.
Pay you a tenner to fit a new cog on my bike?
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:05, Reply)
Are the Magento Developers the ones who draw big purple cocks on everything?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:08,
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No, they are all gay superheroes(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:08,
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"ears"?yeah right. like that's what you keep open in your line of work...
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:30,
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Sorry to hear that dude.The whole fucking country is going tits up.
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:07, Reply)
Sorry to hear that CQ, chin up old boy.You seem fairly sure that you're for the chop - how definite is it? Is it 18 jobs going, or 18 people in the frame?
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:08, Reply)
The best thing isTHERE'S EIGHTEEN OF THEM!!!! LOLOLOLOL
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:13,
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it's rofl's loltoon club(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:24,
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I found out yesterday that Rolf Harris is dyslexicRofl
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:35,
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I'd love to stop and chat to you but I'd rather have type 2 diabetes.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:47,
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that sucks goat ballsClearly you have failed to undermine your co-worker's reputation sufficiently to make you look like a keeper.
Do the stealing but plant the goods on them then shop them to management.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:12,
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urgh that sucksi'm sorry dude. if it helps, they will already know who they want to keep, and will have skewed the "redundancy chart" to make it fit. so little you do now can make much difference, unless it's anal rape.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:16,
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That's your solution to everything.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:21,
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Nothing like a good bum raping to start off the day(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:22,
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i did my girlfriend in the bum over sunday night and she didn't hardly complain at alli got a small willy
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:25, Reply)
She probably didn't notice.Was too busy eating her donner meat with chips.
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:28, Reply)
She's all fur burger and no coat.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:32,
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Well, there is litttle in this worldthat a good solid arseraping can't fix, after all.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:23,
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They are braille instructions for blind bumrapers(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:24,
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kill or cure, Quents.kill or cure.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:26,
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I am sorry to hear that, Quey. I say get job searching either way. This may only be the first round of redundancies.
Chin up. Fancy a City pint to commiserate?
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:25, Reply)
YOU ARE TOO BUSY FOR A LUNCHTIME BEER(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:30,
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Then you can spend the afternoon CHECKING THROUGH IT, can't you?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:45,
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*Wonders if it's too early for a swift vodka, from my special filing cabinet*(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:46, Reply)
If you were prepared to relocate to New South Wales...news.ninemsn.com.au/mobile/article.aspx?id=8410960&_sp=2045&noid=6303&_s=85640d6c-16e1-48c1-b423-a7606fa7e508
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:36,
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If at first you don't succeed, Quinty(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:38,
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Do you want me to tell Stunned?He has you on ignore and won't get the message otherwise.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:41,
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I'm concerned that he will miss your validation.I will screen cap it and put it in a new post below.
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:48, Reply)
Suck it up, sweetcheeks.In all seriousness though, that's really shit, sorry fella.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:36,
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Not likely, I heard Bobby was going and there won't be room for anyone else in Bristol city centre.(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 11:07, Reply)
Update:It's actually looking a bit more hopeful. They way I thought they'd explained it was that if you were at risk you were basically gone unless you could talk then out of it. This morning it seems that 2/3rds of the company are at risk and it's genuinely up in the air who will stay and who will go. Potentially my whole department's for the axe. Anyway I'm going to do the best I can to fight to keep my job but I won't know for sure until the 17th, so still updating my CV, and battening down the hatches.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:49,
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Start looking for new jobs straight away.Call up all the recruitment firms you can and then call them all again every week at least, keep your name fresh in their minds so that they will throw things your way to stop you hassling them.
(, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:51, Reply)
This sounds slightly more positivebut, like you say don't piss about and get ahead of the game.
Also, if you register your details with Total Jobs and specify the type of work you're looking for you should get an email everyday notifying you of all new vacancies. The only down side is that they are UK wide and not area specific (unless there's a way of narrowing the field down that I haven't spotted).
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:55,
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I must have fucked up a Monster search as I wanted ICT Consultant but seem to get Sales Consultant ones(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:56,
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I keep getting health service notifications from Total Jobs.Also, Monster's layout annoys me for some reason.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Jan 2012, 11:04,
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Start acting like you've lost your job already.Look elsewhere, sort yourself out. In the meantime try and do loads of boss things to make yourself indispensable.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:57,
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Stop shaving, sleep in 'til noon, drink more heavilyThat sort of thing?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 31 Jan 2012, 10:58,
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