Well I’m officially one year older today
You know how they say you remember exactly what you were doing on a certain day when X happened, share yours with the rest of us………..
Alt: Cakes I have to provide cakes I’m going down the route of coffee and walnut cakes, suggest some other cake flavour suitable for a mainly male environment.
Alt:alt: I have not yet felt a need to buy a sports car, have an affair, or dress like Dozer when is the Mid-life crisis supposed to kick in?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 7:47, 215 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

The day that Elvis Presley died......
my brother was in hospital having his appendix removed after it had ruptured, I remember being clearly jealous that he got an “Eagle Eyed Action Man”, I had a right face on me and sat there wishing my appendix ruptured so I could get one too.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 7:55, Reply)

By an odd coincidence
I was thinking last night that I have been alive for longer than Elvis has been dead, and it depressed me somewhat as I always think of him as having happened ages ago. It means I am getting old.

alt alt Midlife crisis should start around 36... I mean what are the chances of you living beyond 72?

Oh and happy birthday HH
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:00, Reply)

36??????
I'm well overdue
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:01, Reply)

how old are you??

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:02, Reply)

How rude
you should never ask a Lepus its age.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:07, Reply)

You have a reputation for taking the piss out of us oldies
42
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:09, Reply)

not that old!

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:09, Reply)

OK what have you done with the real Poppet?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:10, Reply)

well my parents are both older than you. as are two of my sisters.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:22, Reply)

Being pedantic...
if we assume that 72 would be an average age to reach then midlife can only be 36,
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:06, Reply)

the day september 11, 2001,
I was in Kakadu national park, hiking with my family. I remember it being stinking hot, and hiding in the pool all day...
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:00, Reply)

I was in Newquay at the time
Went in this Mexican bar and couldn't a find soul in the main bar, in this back room was about 15 people huddled around the TV, as I looked at the TV the 2nd plane hit.
Also good morning Poppet
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:08, Reply)

good morning.
I was 9 years old at the time.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:11, Reply)

Happy bidet m'niggah.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:16, Reply)

Sup Monts
Have you seen QOTW?
And the new Aussie hater account?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:17, Reply)

Yup. I think the genius behind it is a lot closer to home, though.
Despite the 4:29am post, their first one was during the afternoon but they deleted it - it was funnier than this one, they should have left it up.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:21, Reply)

I naturally assumed it was an Aussie
One the time it was posted, two it lacked funnies
No offence Poppet
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:24, Reply)

not offended at all.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:25, Reply)

It's Emvee.
EDIT: it fucking is
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:32, Reply)

OHHHHHHhhhh MAN HE'S TOTALLY TROLLING YOU
I bet you feel really small and silly now, doncha?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:33, Reply)

He's just too good for me!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:34, Reply)

Best you DYAAKY

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:35, Reply)

The day Diana died, I woke up feeling fairly miserable, as my Nan had died the day before.
So whilst we sat, listening to all the simpering fuckwits going on about her on the radio, I couldn't help but think "Who really gives a shit?"

Also, I remember on September 11th 2001, I was at school, on my way from History to Textiles, when a lad who had been giving me shit put me up against a wall. I returned the favour, only pushed him back quite a lot harder, leading to him falling out of the open window (ground floor, low windows in the corridor). I walked off absolutely cracking up, and was in an excellent mood until I got home, and walked in to see my Dad watching TV. As this was a rare thing, it piqued my interest, and I sat and watched it with him. Bit fucking mental.

Alt: Nothing wrong with chocolate cake.

AltAlt: When you look as old as Monty.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:22, Reply)

Do you have any female relatives that are alive?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:26, Reply)

4 Aunties (I think), 2 sisters, 2 sister-in-laws, 1 cousin.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:30, Reply)

It's only a matter of time AA, only a matter of time.

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:31, Reply)

This is true
3(?) of the Aunties have beaten cancer already though, so I'm not sure whether they have more or less time than the others.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:37, Reply)

probably less. Just to be a debbie downer.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:43, Reply)

+und

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

god that took me a minute...

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

Alt: this 'you have to get cakes and shit on your own birthday' bollocks is fucked up.
You won't catch me doing that - fuck that, buy me a cake if you insist, otherwise suck my dick you wankers.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:23, Reply)

+ I can't afford the fuckers anyway

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:25, Reply)

Quite.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:27, Reply)

it was my birthday last week and I did a cheeseboard
It was very well received.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:42, Reply)

So my choices are to buy you cake or suck your dick?
That sounds good to me, I mean, if I was the one giving that choice. I don't want to buy you cake or suck your dicks, but if everyone else could buy me cake or suck my dick, then that would be wicked.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)

Alt: it makes sense though
Would you rather get far too many cakes once a year, or the odd slice of cake every month/week/few days (depending on office size)?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:20, Reply)

I remember the day Moaty got shot, as it was my wedding day
Alt: meat cakes or pies as they are otherwise known

Altalt: I'd get a sports car now if I had the money
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:39, Reply)

You would spend 16 hours at the petrol station wondering why the air hose....
Isn't filling the petrol tank
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:42, Reply)

Then go in the garage and try to buy a much longer air hose for no good reason.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

On the other hand me and the rest of the rugby team can fill your mum up in no time at all

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:50, Reply)

They can TRY
LOLZ
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:51, Reply)

monts
That quirk will just be that emvee replied to it but he has you on 2.0. Nothing to do with comedy accounts.

Happy birthday Harters.

The morning that Diana died was the morning after some DnB clubnight in Aberdeen. Think I was still up and caning it.

If you ever want a full Pat Bateman style breakdown of that day's sartorial choices just gaz me bbz.

Did you have a listen to that BPB tune?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

Oh I see

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:43, Reply)

I've seen it now.
It's still him. No one else is as upset on the internet as him.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:45, Reply)

of course it's him

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

BET YOU FEEL SILLY NOW!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:45, Reply)

VERY

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

Thanks PD
As per Gaz
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:17, Reply)

Also, for my birthday in two weeks, I have a gf lemon and almond meal merangue cake
and a non-gf chocolate cake for everyone who isn't gf.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

GF?
Gay as fuck?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

Gluten Free you fucking numpty.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:48, Reply)

Ahh

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:49, Reply)

I don't believe in gluten

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:50, Reply)

why?
it's a protein that gets activated by water and heat where Glutenin and Gliadin bond together. it's what makes your pastry all flaky or your bread all soft.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:52, Reply)

Nah it's like saturated fats, made up by companies trying to control us

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:54, Reply)

Nakers, why are you trying to break my brain?

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:55, Reply)

Then we'll be twins again : )

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:57, Reply)

my birthday is only 3 days after yours mate, I'm sure we'll be close enough.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:58, Reply)

rain alls
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:57, Reply)

A girlfriend cake?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:48, Reply)

like an edible fleshlight

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)

I only have three memories:
Getting a key cut, waiting in line for a movie and talking to you right now.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

No MULTITASKING CHAT

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:52, Reply)

On the day that John Fashanu and Kevin LLoyd died
I was having a drug and alcohol induced paranoia attack in a toilet on a train out of Amsterdam brought on by the fact that John Fashanu and Kevin Lloyd had died.

I'm classy as fuck, me.

Edit: Yup, I meant Justin, sorry.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:53, Reply)

I had no idea John Fashanu was dead.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:55, Reply)

Surprising given my usual on-the-button sports knowledge.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:56, Reply)

Justin, sorry.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:05, Reply)

NO REAL NAMES ON THE INTERNET PLEASE
Yours,

Justin
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Do you mean Justin Fashanu?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:55, Reply)

Hahah
Although I'm pretty sure the fash is still alive...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:56, Reply)

John Fahsharnoo
www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLuaqNoxjro
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:57, Reply)

Seeing that again has made my day.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:09, Reply)

On 9/11 I was visiting a friend in hospital - he'd been flown back from Spain with diabetic complications
Alt: As suggested above, get meat pies with a few fairy cakes for the ladies.
Altalt: Mine hasn't kicked in yet and I'm considerably older than you. However, I had sports cars and did dangerous sports etc in my twenties so I feel no urge now I'm in my fifties.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:54, Reply)

Alt alt: I've been having my mid-life crisis since my early twenties.
I expect it will pass in a few years.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 8:58, Reply)

I have never really been into drugs..........
But I was tripping my nuts off at a party in November 1989, when the Berlin Wall thing was being ripped down.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)

I remember the morning Diana died
My friends had been to visit me, and we'd watched Conspiracy Theory and then all crashed in my room. When we switched the TV on in the morning, we couldn't get the sound to work at all, so we knew something bad had happened and it involved the royal family, but had no idea what.

I was teaching the day of 9/11, so I didn't hear anything about it until after school. As soon as I got home I went straight to news 24 and watched the aftermath.

Alt alt: I'm still waiting for mine. I reckon I'm well overdue by now.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:09, Reply)

I'll never forget where I was during the Market Rasen earthquake of 2008.
I was in London, and spoke to my sister that evening, who had noticed that the light in the living room swayed a little bit.

Terrifying.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)

The Great Melbourne Earthquake of 2012.
I was in Geelong. WE WILL REBUILD!
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)

i remember where i was when i saw the most pathetic thing in the world
it was on qotw about 2 mins ago. someone is actually wasting their life right there.

alt: coffee sucks arse. go with lemon drizzle. best of all teh cakes.

altalt: i have a sports car. but i only own a turquoise t-shirt for the gym and one turquoise bra, so i don't think i am dressing like dozer.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)

I can still remember where I was that day those oil miners destroyed that asteroid that was going to ruin the earth

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:30, Reply)

where were you then?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:32, Reply)

I'm not certain it was dark

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

.... on the astroid.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

Duh! That hasn't happened yet!
Has it?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)

I remember where I was when I saw a stupid irishman. It was about half an hour ago on the telly:
www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/local-national/republic-of-ireland/support-for-irish-drinkdrive-permits-is-spreading-16264897.html
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

Christ on a bike!
Surely this isn't serious?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

feck off
april fools day isn't for another 2 months
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

You should have seen the blok actually on the telly, he looked like he was about three quarters cut and kept leaning sideways

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

This fuckwit
www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=Danny+Healy-Rae&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.&bvm=bv.41248874,d.d2k&biw=1440&bih=710&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=xrH_UMPpOoaWhQessYDwAQ
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

christ
it's a different world
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

He looks like Mr Baxter

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

STEB-SON!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

so who's the latest troll, emvee? or someone else?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:55, Reply)

Deffo em v as its so shit
And it had the potential for lols
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)

see, i don't want it to be emvee
part of me secretly hopes for another bertdown. always good fun.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

EmVee almost 100%
No other poster is so desperately unfunny.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Seems sensible really, I mean three pints ent that much and what will they actually hit if they do crash a sheep?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

my brother was at uni in ireland and staying with a mate in the middle of nowhere
they were driving back to her parents' farm in the dark and they were approaching a 4 way crossroad. to his horror and terror, she suddenly switched off the headlights and shot across it in the dark. when he had finished shitting himself, he asked what the shuddering fuck she was playing at. she explained that it was much easier to see oncoming headlights at the other 3 roads if she switched hers off.

he was UNconvinced, but could at least see a bit of logic. until she added: "everybody does it."

unbelievable.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

Hahaha, fucking genius!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

my brother said that when he pointed out the gaping hole in her logic
she and her parents were genuinely amazed. the mind boggles.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

er....but
if everybody does it, doesn't that mean you have up to 4 cars racing towards a crossroads with no lights on thinking nothing's coming. ...?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Use your loaf man
That's what they are on about
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Hence swipe ponying out the flaw in the plan

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

well, at least you're quicker than she was!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

I needs more caffeine.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)

some people are fucking dickheads.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

I've seen "Wolf Creek" no way I'd walk back from the pub in the dark

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

I've drank Wolf Creek

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

I saw him interviewed on the news this morning too
if he wasn't drunk he was having some sort of stroke
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

Morning HH,
I remember being upset the morning Diana died as there were no early morning cartoons.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

Sad times Windy,Sad times

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

I was distraught mate.
Doing anything nice for your birthday?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

No real plans as of yet.
I'm a right miserable cunt on B-days, I'll probs go out for a meal over the weekend.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

I was overjoyed as Sunderland had beaten Bradford 4-0 the night before her funeral
and got a punch off my then girlfriend for smiling all through the coverage
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

It was ridiculous
The big tree on the main road in town was turned into a bloody shrine, candles and all sorts - none of those who did it had ever even met her. Might as well have put up one to Vera Duckworth, she was on the telly too.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

When I went to Paris I did have a look at the tunnel
Henri Paul - shite driver
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

'Henri Paul - shite driver'
Also pissed AND French.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

I bet he would have nailed it in reverse

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)

^^ This ^^

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:19, Reply)

Happy bidet HH
The morning that Princess Of Our Hartz died I was lying in bed, having just woken up with a stinking hangover. I turned the radio on, heard nothing but funereal music and immediately assumed that I had died from alcohol poisoning and this was some kind of hideous after-life experience. Imagine my relief when I realised that some dozy droopy-drawered bint had popped her clogs instead.

Alt: Anything with chocolate is acceptable.

AltAlt: Dozer isn't having a midlife crisis, he's having a sexual-orientation crisis. Totally different game altogether. I used to have a Vauxhall Cavalier. Nothing remotely fancy, but my son was only 3 at the time and thought it was a sports car because it had a sunroof. so it's all about perceptions. Or something.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Was Diana that well remembered?
I can remember driving to Cornwall on the day of her funeral, and thinking how clear the roads were and also falling over the wall at Jamaica Inn whilst stepping back to take a photo
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

Aye it was a nightmare.
I think most people couldn't have given 2 shits TBH, but seemed to be drowned out by the weeping and wailing of the nation's grief-mongers.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

I'd been out smashing it
and had a few people back at mine afterwards, and had TV on mute, playing records. This mangled up car kept on appearing on-screen so we put the sound up to see if it was anyone interesting. Turned out it wasn't, so the tunes went back on again.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

^^^ Acceptable response to 'an enormous national tragedy'

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:54, Reply)

I saw the sea of polythene that was left outside st James palace
It was embarrassing
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Hang on a minute...
Is Diana Spencer dead?
When did this happen???
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

I was in that London on September 11th 2001 and working near Clapham Junction
Heard rumours about it and then the entire internet ground to a halt. Was staying in Richmond that night and was listening to the planes flying over when suddenly there was a massive BANG! Totally shit myself and peeked out the window to find two cars wrapped round each other and the whole hotel shouting profanities at them for scaring the crap out of us all
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

Sportscow.
I'm annoyed. it deleted my post.

I was whining about my mother denying that she'd paid a bill, when I had the receipt to show her that she had, with the correct transaction number, date and everything on it. She's breaking my brain. :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

Punch her in the throat
It is the only way
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

I think she's getting Alzheimers, I genuinely do.
She's not remembering things that she would normally remember..
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

07/07
i was cross at being ejected from the tube two stops before i wanted to get off and all the buses being so rammed that i had a long walk to work in high heels. had i been about 2 trains earlier, though, i'd have had a LOT more to complain about. well, or nothing at all.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

do you realise how stupid it is to say "if I had been 2 trains earlier"
I was in London that day, if only I'd been on the other side of London doing something different I might have died too.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

I understand this logic
But she did come pretty close
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

The "vinegar strokes" of tragedy

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

closer than me maybe, but considering the population density of London, a lot of people were a lot closer.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

that's a little bit of a facile argument
yes ok a miss is as good as a mile, and i'm not saying i nearly died. but when it comes to a taste of how terrifying it must have been, there's a difference between someone in texas saying, god imagine if i'd chosen that time to travel to london and visit my friend at kings cross - and being rammed in a rather panicky station of people all trying to get out with police yelling at you!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

it's alright.
I'm just being a bit grumpy this morning.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

that's quite alright
you can take it out on me, i don't mind
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

sorry swipe.
I'll make it up to you at London bash.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

aren't you coming to the secret bash?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

I'm coming to the secret bash

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

I'm secretly having a 'bash'

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:08, Reply)

I'm coming for definate

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:10, Reply)

no no
you didn't invite us to your crib drinks with rory
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)

Rory didn't even invite me
He just snuck in one day when I was out.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)

rapey rory

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:16, Reply)

I don't know about secret bash :(

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:16, Reply)

i'm just being silly
there is no secret bash
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

is there going to be a London bash?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:23, Reply)

definitely
if nobody else has done anything about it in the next month or so, i will organise something for april/may.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:23, Reply)

Can it have a turquoise themed dress code?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)

no
as i would have to go in my old gym t-shirt. but for everyone else, yeah sure why not, as gilgamesh once said
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Well after you cancelled on H4WKB4$H no-one trusts you any more.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

:(

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)

:o(((((

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)

Is that Labs giving a blowie?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)

will you ask them to dedicate a song to our undying love?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)

AltAlt:
I had a Mazda RX-8. It was fun
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Wankle lols

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)

A fucking brilliant car to drive, that was
Stupid "having kids"
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Blood sucking parasites

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

With their "car seats" and "prams"
Bastards
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)

see, this is why I have no desire to have children.
At the moment I'm trying to decide what car to get in the summer, probably a little soft top porsche, or an old mgb or something. Maybe even an old sl Mercedes.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

i LOVE the old mgb's
and the ragtop beetles
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

I THINK you mean 'the moptop Beatles'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:11, Reply)

mgb gt, soft top. beautiful.
My only worry is I might be too tall to fit.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)

just put the roof down!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

it's more getting my legs under the steering wheel that I might struggle with.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)

to be fair
i'm only 5'6 and even my legs get a bit cramped in my car. and it's longer than an mgbgt. but if you were only doing short journeys in it...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)

yeah, I'm 6'2"
Gonna struggle with most old sporty cars. Got stuck on an Austin Healey Frog eye sprite once. Took 3 people to sort of drag me out over the back.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)

You are the Ed China of /OT

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:26, Reply)

Just crochet an extension on

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

I love old 911s
Anyway your still young, plenty of time later to think about kids
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

I tried on both my suits this morning and neither fit properly cos I've lost so much weight
But I'm not dieting or excercising...I think it might be bowel cancer
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

You're Probably just using a fork to eat your soup......
and have not realised yet
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:11, Reply)

i use a fork to eat ice cream

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

gAIDS

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:19, Reply)

Tee Hee Eee
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/For-Sale-12-x-8-Igloo-on-The-Stray-In-Harrogate-/271142681345?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_3&hash=item3f215cfb01
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Tee hee ee indeed.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:16, Reply)

chortle

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

aww that's nice.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:34, Reply)

neeeew thread

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Someone start a new thread.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:36, Reply)

lols

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:37, Reply)

Roffle

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 Jan 2013, 10:52, Reply)