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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Give us some reasons to mock you
OK as a new thread was required I thought I would share this shameful fact... I was singing along to Steeleye Span this morning and it was great...

Mock away and reveal a shameful fact.

Alt, or don't its up to you. I am going for a fag
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:31, 240 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
No idea who they were, sorry
A quick Google reveals that the Yurtsmiths have competition
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:35, Reply)
70's folk rock

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:47, Reply)
Thought Debbie Harry was english because she sings in an english accent

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:36, Reply)
She does?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:40, Reply)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:00, Reply)
No, I didn't think so.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:02, Reply)
Ear of glass, that boy

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
She bloody does

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:20, Reply)
I now have "Maria" as an earworm
Cheers
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:48, Reply)
mareeeearworm?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:54, Reply)
You gotta see it

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:55, Reply)
does it make you go insane
and out of your mind?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:56, Reply)
No, thats the wife

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:57, Reply)
i have fucking "joseph" on my ipod, i'm not in any position to mock anyone
alt: noooooooooooooooooo don't do it, come baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:37, Reply)
ffs
What for?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:49, Reply)
got taken to see it as a small child and someone bought me the LP
loved it. fell asleep every night with the cat (a remarkably tolerant and hypoallergenic cat called pippa) listening to it.

so nostalgia innit. it had to be the original london cast recording, with the quentin blake illustration on the album. none of that ghastly jason donovan crap.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:53, Reply)
I am back with an extra wheeze in my step
I was in a production of Joseph many years ago... (way way back you might say) and I can still recite most of the songs
*more shameful news as it arrives*
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:49, Reply)
Are you coming out here?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:49, Reply)
it would seem so

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:50, Reply)
Go for it

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:52, Reply)
I studied dance and drama for my totally useless degree

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:52, Reply)
and I can still do my 5 ballet "positions"

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:53, Reply)
The Angry Pirate
The Goatse
The Winking Starfish
The Teapot

and what?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:56, Reply)
The Early Onset Arthritis?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:58, Reply)
The osteoplie

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:59, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:00, Reply)
They are the starting positions for your feet
so heels together toes apart and so on... And chaps the ability to dance is something that ladies find very attractive in a man, A fact I have used to my advantage in many a darkened night club (where they cant see my hideous face)
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:01, Reply)
The thought of a bloke pulling a ballet move in a nightclub round here is most lolsome

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:02, Reply)
Worked in Reds bar

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
Moscow

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:04, Reply)
Newcastle Uni

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:05, Reply)
I didn't know it was called that and I worked there!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:08, Reply)
It was at the time the longest bar in the UK
I was visiting some friends at the uni at the time

edit.. sorry it was Northumbria Uni, if that's any different?
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:13, Reply)
Yes
Thats the "other" one
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
Well they all spoke funny
and it was in Newcastle, so tomato tomatoe
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:20, Reply)
me too!
stupid photographic memory.

if i'm ever in a pub quiz where you have to name joseph's 11 brothers, that cash pot is mine...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:53, Reply)
Benjamin and Judah which leaves only 1
JACOB... Jacob and sons
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:55, Reply)
reuben was the oldest of the children of israel
with simeon and levi the next in line...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:55, Reply)
^crackers^

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:56, Reply)
As in the technicoloured dream coat? I love that "Close my eyes" one.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
I enjoyed singing
Potifar most of all...

GHEY^
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:24, Reply)
The fiddle player from Steeleye Span lives near my uncle in France
Cool story, eh?
In spite of my yurt prick credentials, I actually can't stand many of the 70s folk rock bands, including SS.

Ok, shameful fact time: I have been trying to work out how to play Nineteen Hundred and Eighty-Five on the piano, for I have an inexplicable love for the album Band on the Run.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:40, Reply)
Monty's favourites

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:49, Reply)
Peter Knight?
He keeps claiming to live in Hastings when he's on stage...
(Twangy Rubber, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Yer him.
Perhaps he has two houses?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)
MADE OF MONEY!!
/looks for fiddle
(Twangy Rubber, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Also, hello who are you?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)
*sharpens pitch fork*
he better answer
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:07, Reply)
I'm me.
As in, not one of them ^

I just lurk here, although I appear to have outed myself as a Steeleye Span fan. Don't worry, I'm probably a bent spastic like everyone else...
(Twangy Rubber, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:14, Reply)
Lurk less and post more.
We might just keep this place alive for a few more months.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:17, Reply)
I'm not really qualified to post here
I've never been near Swipe...
(Twangy Rubber, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:20, Reply)
Are you wearing the Green Willow?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:22, Reply)
No, that's just the way my trousers hang.

(Twangy Rubber, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:23, Reply)
My life is a shameful fact.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:41, Reply)
I enjoy some of the music of The Pet Shop Boys
^Gay prick^
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:42, Reply)
Do you really thinking I'm going to give you cunts anymore ammunition?
No fucking chance.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:52, Reply)
I truthfully cannot think of anything to admit
I have porked some proper munters over my time though
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:52, Reply)
funnily enough, that's what they said

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:54, Reply)
Funny enough that's what Chompy said.
Something about a pizza too.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:57, Reply)
you've seen bash pics
that is all
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:00, Reply)
Not even seen them, I'm just going by the gossip and in you endo.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:04, Reply)
i don't have endo
my friend does, it sounds fucking painful
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:09, Reply)
I have it.
It's fucking ridiculous.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:10, Reply)
yeah, it sounds pretty ropey :((

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
Cramps from the ribcage to the knees
: (
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:25, Reply)
The company I ran the purification department of
developed a proper therapeutic treatment for endometriosis. It was extremely effective in trials, but considered probably too expensive to make, so was pulled.

There you have the therapeutic industry in a nutshell, I also why I quit working in it.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:40, Reply)
But you still enjoy rubbing b3th's face in it?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:00, Reply)
I'm a terrible cunt.

Also: I'm pretty sure I've discussed this with her before.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:03, Reply)
Most likely
Still, best 30 seconds they ever* had

* that day
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:57, Reply)
If they were that ugly, why did you do it twice?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:58, Reply)
I was getting my moneys worth

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:00, Reply)
you mean begging?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:01, Reply)

yes
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:01, Reply)
i knew it

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
*retracts begging gazzes*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:04, Reply)
TOO LATE

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:04, Reply)
I think of it as shamefull for here
i.e. I like SciFi
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:54, Reply)
Oh no

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:58, Reply)
lets be honest here
after the ballet and Joseph confessions I am safe with anything else
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:02, Reply)
Let it all out Bonz

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
I also raise my right pinky finger when I type
GHEY^
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:05, Reply)
i do sometimes get you and bartleby confused
are you fat?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:06, Reply)
5'11 and 12 st
if that's fat
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:10, Reply)
And married before you get any ideas young lady

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:10, Reply)
i'm thinking of going off men anyway
lesbians look to have a much easier time of it
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:11, Reply)
I have seen some instructional videos
and I have to admit it does look like fun
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:14, Reply)
I've seen the Maddy Priorband really rather good, was a long time back though.
I have Thomas the Rhymer as a fucking earworm now thanks bery much.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 10:54, Reply)
I'm in a work canteen and have been shown the serving counter.
Told that is where I get my grub. Then shown a cutlery counter. Told that is where I score the cutlery. I thought you needed to hear this.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
Man they must realise how stupid you are

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
I thought this.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:06, Reply)
WITH A KNIFE!!!11!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
where is stunned when we need him?
his bent electronic cancerstick is ripe for a good mocking.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:03, Reply)
>:(

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:04, Reply)
it looks ridiculous, like a bent cigarette holder from the 1920's
there is a reason why all the adverts show WOMEN using them
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Actually it's classy and sexy.
Chicks dig it.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:06, Reply)
mmmm yes, fake chemicals in your mouth and throat. we can't wait to kiss that, bet it tastes like rainbows and cancer

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:09, Reply)
You say that like its a *bad* thing....

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:11, Reply)
i'll never know

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:11, Reply)
Because cool sexy classy flange hounds aren't interested in you.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:12, Reply)
no, because i wouldn't ever go near a plastic ashtray mouth!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:15, Reply)
As if you'd get the opportunity

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:16, Reply)
there are hundreds of people "smoking" those things
it's inevitable
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:16, Reply)
Eventually you'd find a blind one?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
well yeah
sooner or later the chemicals will fuck up their eyes
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:22, Reply)
Until I was at university
I genuinely didn't realise that Arkansas was the same place as 'Arkansaw'. To be fair, if you don't see and hear the word at the same time...
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:12, Reply)
*chugabugs*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
whatabugs?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Wacky Races innit

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Oh, right.
I can never remember any of the teams.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:28, Reply)
I like this

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:19, Reply)
WHAAAAAAAT?

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:19, Reply)
I didn't know this until NOW

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:20, Reply)
I didn't know that Sideshow Bob was played by your man from Fraser until recently.
Despite watching The Simpsons with depressing regularity since it was first on BBC2.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:22, Reply)
apparently they are killing off a major character this series

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)
I've not watched any of the 'new' ones.
From what I gather they're shite and I've only got council telly.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)
I made Lamb, Apricot, Garlic, Wine and Olive jam last night, it's really really good.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:18, Reply)
Lamb jam?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Well, it's basicly gravy without water and flour..... but it's REALLY good.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:24, Reply)
I don't really understand, but if it's lamb I'm interested.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:26, Reply)
Sheep nonce

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:30, Reply)
Woooahhhoo
fat gonzy jams and lamb
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Was I supposed to read this to the tune of Black Betty?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:22, Reply)
And the award for Today's Earworm goes too..... *opens envolope*

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:23, Reply)
On my current playlists
for both car and house, fact fans.
See also 'Wig Wam Bam' and 'Little Willie', both by Sweet.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:25, Reply)
Look up a guy called "One String Bushy", I love his song "Chicken in da corn"

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:29, Reply)
That really does sound like an awful euphemism

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:35, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I DID

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:23, Reply)
I would hope so

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Ha

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:24, Reply)
You can do what you want to Tangles my dear chap
But I wrote it to the tune of Black Betty if that helps
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:25, Reply)
I'm looking for camera bags and being a proper ponce about it.
That's all I can think of at the moment.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:35, Reply)

p N
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)
As the years go by so does my sense of shame*
*drives to McDonalds drive-thru in spongebob pjs and slippers*

Didn't they do that Xmas song that's always on the second disc of two disc Xmas Cds that never gets played?

*see also: fashion sense, dignity, hopes and dreams, etc
(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)
I thought, until fairly recently, that the term 'jap's eye' meant your bumhole

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)
well that could go horribly wrong

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)
People telling me how painful it was getting something stuck in their japs was horribly confusing for me

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Quality comedy gold, Theo.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)
thats a conversation with a doctor you dont want to have

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)
'He said he was screaming after getting a pen lid stuck in there'
'I reckon I could get twelve pens up there no bother, esp after a shit'
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Also
How many people have you spoken to that have had something stuck in their japs eye?
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Everyone experiments man, come on, don't be vanilla

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)
I want this on record
I HAVE NEVER TRIED TO STICK A PEN LID DOWN MY COCK
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:57, Reply)
Alright man, your loss

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:58, Reply)
*tries
*loses pen lid
*panics
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:11, Reply)
It's ok, you'll spunk it out in a few years

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:16, Reply)
POW!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:20, Reply)
I was having a wank and I shot the dog
(Is the punchline I believe)
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)
+in

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:22, Reply)
bicfail

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:09, Reply)
birosexual

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:12, Reply)

www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B004FTGJUW
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:13, Reply)
These win
www.stylist.co.uk/life/recipes/introducing-dine-ink-pen-cutlery
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:20, Reply)
worst joke ever!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:22, Reply)
HA HA

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)
I missed my 9th candle day

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)
I thought INXS was pronounced "Inks" until I went to University.
Although, I used to work with an otherwise intelligent chap who thought that "Don Quixote" was pronounced "donkey shot" so, y'know, there's always someone worse off, eh readers?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:42, Reply)
he had summed up the plot fairly succinctly, mind you

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Jeremy Paxman said 'Don Quicksote' on University Challenge once.
I was flabbergasted.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)
Danny Dyer > Jeremy Paxman

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)
"World's Hardest Gangs"
with Jeremy "P-Dog" Paxman
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)
We need to pitch this to Channel 5.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:28, Reply)
That's pretty much as bad
even more so, as the guy I was talking about was half-Dutch so had a borderline excuse.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)
He also pronounced Christina Aguilera' surname as 'Ag-ee-air-a' on the same show, once.
Which I rather liked
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:54, Reply)
That's probably correct
but I'm afraid I'm only really interested in his pronounciation of her name if he was up to the back wheels in her dirtbox at the time.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:55, Reply)
I suspect he was showing what a smart arse he is with his pronunciation of Quixote as well
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Quixote#Spelling_and_pronunciation
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Its probably the noise she would make upon entry

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:00, Reply)
he may have been lightly frying some oxford professors at the time

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:56, Reply)
I am going to point out what a clever reply this is

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:02, Reply)
and then ppossibly talk to myself for a bit

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:02, Reply)
I appear to have a stutter

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:03, Reply)
"Remember, Basil - there's always someone in the world worse off than you are."
"Well I'd like to meet him - I could do with a laugh."
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Shameful fact?
I've just had a massive steak dinner. For breakfast.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:48, Reply)
i had a handful of jelly beans
i think i win

or lose, as the case may be
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:48, Reply)
There's no shame in that
cow is a multipurpose food.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)
\o/

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:07, Reply)
I've just ordered a chinese.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)
Yeah well I touched a steak once

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:55, Reply)
fucking bovophiles
coming over here. touching our cows.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:56, Reply)
I had five fingers up the japs eye of a cow

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:57, Reply)
...and you didn't even buy me a drink

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:07, Reply)
he's a right bastard like that.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:08, Reply)
Wore me like a glove, that man

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:08, Reply)
well, it's better than wearing you like a hat.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:09, Reply)
That was after he bought me a drink

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:12, Reply)
But not quite good as wearing someone as a WW2 gasmask.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:22, Reply)
heeeeee hawwwwwwww....... heeeee hawwwwwwww...... I am your father.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:22, Reply)
Donkey Ho Tay

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:23, Reply)
Darth Vader the 100 acre woods years

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:24, Reply)
I balanced a pint on your back but you had to go and rear

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:08, Reply)
Is this another japs eye area of confusion for you?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:58, Reply)
we only ever ate the bumhole of the cow when I was growing up
mummy called them jappy rings
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)
Is your mum the one that cores the anuses of UFO style mutilated cattle?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:05, Reply)
She just inserts her razored tongue up their japs and then pulles out the central stem of the cow in one swift movement

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:06, Reply)
RIMMING SKILLZ

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:07, Reply)
*crosses udders*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:08, Reply)
^ horny

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:08, Reply)
"filleting a cow in one easy step"

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:09, Reply)
NO U NEVER

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)
I FUCKIN DID MAN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT SHIT I BEEN THROUGH

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)
That's probably wise if you are still working to holiday drinking rules.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:03, Reply)
WIN!
It's never too early for steak.

I also love hangover leftover pizza/curry the morning after.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:33, Reply)
I genuinely think this is a good idea and am tempted to buy one for loafing around my house in winter.
www.amazon.co.uk/MusucBag-Lite-light-sleeping-arms/dp/B005XKJDLE/ref=pd_sim_sbs_sg_4
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:11, Reply)
i just bought my niece the complete set of "wacky races" on dvd from amazon
maybe i should get her one of those too
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:12, Reply)
Jesus fuck
that's worse than a onesie. It's worse than a paedo in a onesie touching up a duck.

Why the fuck to people feel the need to wear babies clothes?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:13, Reply)
someone sounds a littttttttttttttttttttle bit like they're swimming in that river in egypt here

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:14, Reply)
Nothing is worse than a 'onesie'
It makes me feel sick just typing *that* word.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:14, Reply)
furries are worse

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:17, Reply)
Well okay, I will allow that. Just that fucking word sets my teeth on edge.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:18, Reply)
It's basically a wearable bed.
How can that ever be a bad idea?

Onesie's are basically pyjamas for twats aren't they?
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:16, Reply)
A 'onesie' is a cunts uniform. Like when people wear a shirt with tracksuit trousers.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:19, Reply)
People don't actually do that do they?
I've got a set of fleece tracksuit bottoms, I wouldn't even wear them outside my own house.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:20, Reply)
I have witnessed it. I do live in a very classy area though.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:32, Reply)
and shoes
fucking tracksuit bottoms and shoes... it makes me so fucking angry
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:23, Reply)
Shoes with white socks :(
Onesies are for trendy hipster pricks.

Nothing wrong with joggers and a tee.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:32, Reply)
I just had to wait at a cashpoint
behind a hipster on a bright lime green and shocking pink fixie. Hideous.

Although at least pretty visible on the road, I guess.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:36, Reply)
Easier to hit.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:42, Reply)
where to begin?
I think a lot of people have put some choice music so far so I will include my love of synth pop over the years from Erasure to Robyn.

I also love a good few trashy American telly shows. Desperate Housewives etc. Not the shit ones they show on More4 though. Im not that bad.

Reality telly is something else that draws me in.

That and the obvious gay of course.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:31, Reply)
I once posted obnoxious comments on b3ta.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:34, Reply)
You sir, are a cad and a bounder

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 12:41, Reply)

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