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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Best thread ever. Sheds, clutches, lunchor whisky?(, Thu 1 May 2014, 8:50, 188 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
Hi Twoosie, how's yousie?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:03,
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Just hearing that you are alright makes everything alright(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:05,
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BAKED BEAN CHATWhere's Monty? I want to say 'Hullo Monty' and then have him reply in kind.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2014, 8:53,
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Morning! So you're a doctor right? I can trust you with something extremely personal right?
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2014, 8:55,
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Ok, here goesI'm seriously considering becoming a serial killer, focusing primarily on people who park illegally/irresponsibly, then moving on to people who are just generally rude and/or inconsiderate. How should I proceed?
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2014, 8:59,
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D'you know, I used to be stric'ly Heinz, but some of these other beans are okHP anyone?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:04,
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I just think Heinz's days at the top of the pile are long goneEven some of those weird brands that only exist in corner shops, like BestIn, are standing up against them and at a fraction of the price.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:15,
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Really their dominance was based not on product quality but the brand image that they projectedWell the baked bean cataracts have truely my been peeled from eyeballs
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:17,
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Now you've put this out there, the next time you visit Tesco the shelves will be filled with other baked bean brands(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:20,
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That's democracy my friend God bless america
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:23,
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best of all the he-man baddies(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 1 May 2014, 8:58,
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I'm going to feel terrible when I sober up later. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:00,
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Think I'm going to need a triple in a bit:Bread.
Bacon & egg.
Bread.
Bacon & mushroom.
Bread.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:10,
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Go and have a shower you smell like Cyril Smith's ballbag(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:12,
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UnlikelyHad a full check up as part of the company's free private health thing - apart from the nerve damage and surgery bits I'm all tickety-boo. Liver function, heart function, cholesterol - all fine.
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The smoking points of different cooking fats please bob(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:01,
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Sitting in a wendy house, eating curry, drinking Knob Creek with a clutch up your arse.or 'Saturday Night' as you call it.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:05,
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Bit early for you, ent it?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:06,
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I always get up earlier when the weather gets nicer. Im like a hibernating animal.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:12,
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If your were an animal you'd be a blobfishjunkee.com/while-you-were-sleeping-australias-blobfish-made-it-into-global-news/19644
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:15,
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That's not an animal sweetheartHave another go
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:20,
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I believe call centres like to harass the vulnerable at the beginning and end of the dayWhen success is most likely
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:13,
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nope.After 5pm has a higher contact rate
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:20,
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^ definitely doesn't work in a call centre, oh no(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:22,
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I work in an office. which has a call centre part.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:27,
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Which you work in, we know Jay, we know ;-)(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:30,
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how have I got time to chat to you lot if im on the phone constantly?(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:36,
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I would Imagine you type whilst talking, like I do?(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:36,
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I would imagine he struggles to chew gum and walk at the same time(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:37,
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^ call centre drone admission right there.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:39,
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No, I sell stuff Jason, motherfuckers be calling me, yo.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:40,
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CHRIST, men multi-taskingwhat a terrifying idea
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:39,
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you can't sleep and watch tv programmes thoughhowever much you think you can. and then the blonde one er......... was there and............. BUT I WASN'T SLEEPING!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:42,
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ALSO WORKS IN A CALL CENTRE.Do you two have secret gay callcentre sex meet ups?
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:58,
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Speakerphone? kinky.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:11,
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I bet you're all like "Oh Jayse, are you going to close it? You can seal my deal any time. OWN THE CLIENT, OWN THE CLIENT"(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:10,
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LETS GET THESE SALES AND MAKE THESE DEALS JAYSUMS! QUARTERLY TARGET BONUS IS WITHIN REACH! LETS SMASH THE GLASS CEILING!(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:12,
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Ain't you heard of three-way calling? Hook a bro' up yo'.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:23,
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He doesn't, he's a ********* manager in the **************** industry (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:39,
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HE DOESNT WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW PLEASE DELETE THIS(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:40,
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he's like the gherkin that you get in burgersyou don't exactly hate him, but you certainly didn't order him, you aren't going to eat him, and he's always going to get left on the side of the plate.
but he's ALWAYS there.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:47,
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I dunno what her problem is with you m8, I'm always fighting your corner.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:21,
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I think she has a bit of a crush on me, which is awkward with how close you and I are, and she knows it can never beIt's fine though, she'll get over me.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:23,
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I'll always be on the side of your platexx
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:35,
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better than being shoved inside my greasy burgeri had an amazing veggie burger from sticky fingers last night. chickpea patty, right, standard, but with caramelised onions, aubergine chutney, lettuce and this chilli alioli stuff and somehow a bit of blue cheese got in there. AMAZING.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:40,
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It weren't exactly as good as my mega ribs though eh eh?(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:41,
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Why not hop in the shower with battered? You can wash each other's backs and weep gently together(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:15,
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I'm right as rain; aside from the fact that I'm in Bracknell (
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:19,
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There's a lovely little pub by the train station thereI wouldn't stray further from the trains than that though
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No time, got a meeting then back to london for all company update bollocksNorwich is on next week...
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:22,
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Not sure on my movements yet or where I'm stayingSomewhere loverly I'm sure
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:36,
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No. I don't drink myself to death through the week.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:21,
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Yes, and the worst of it is I didn't even have the pleasure of a drink last night.Man flu imminent I reckon.
(, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:22, Reply)
Hangovers are the pursuit of determined and committed paedophiles.Or maybe it's kids? One of them anyway.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:22,
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My cleaner asked for my advice on hdmi cables yesterday(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:26,
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FFS does she not realise how awkward it is for you to have to speak to her?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:32,
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Am hoping he might be in the next X-Men movieas apparently Apocalypse is
(, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:26, Reply)
I think it's a high possiblity that Apocalypse will be in "X-Men: Age of Apocalypse".www.imdb.com/title/tt3385516/
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:24,
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Oh god, i'm sorry, i've just realised that i've totally done some kind of CEX/Forbiden Planet style sarcasam about a movie.I've let you down, i've let myself down, and worst of all, i've let the team down.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:27,
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THIS!Mine gets moved about an inch further forward each day, soon it won't even be by my desk! FUCK MY LIFE!
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Peej, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:36,
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They moved it from one side of my desk to the otherWHY MUST THEY PROVOKE MY RAGE?
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:41,
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The missus has just phoned she has it in her head to buy a boat for family holidays. Anyone know anything about nautical stuff?Apparently theyre off out on one today.(, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:37, Reply)
Flys, floats or fucks - rent it.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:56,
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my dad has a shedi don't go in it, haven't done for years and years. it looks spidery.
i never have to think about the clutch in my car. which is good, because when i had an old beetle, the clutch slipped off about 3 times in a year.
lunch will be a brown rice and wholegrain burrito, as i didn't get one yesterday.
whisky is gross. VODKA CHAT.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:38,
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Someone that lunches.As in professionally, rather than somebody that is currently at lunch, which would be "luncher".
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:42,
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minor character from game of thronesslits people's throats for a flagon of mead and a hunk of roasted dragon haunch
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:43,
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I am also slightly hungover this morning(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 May 2014, 9:47,
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I'd send you home, with a verbal warning(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:24,
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I'm not stupid enough to get caught, thankfully.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:33,
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No, I bet your hardly stink of booze and vomit at all and look as fresh as a daisy.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:36,
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I smell of shower gel and vomit, more likely.Also, I look surprisingly fine.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:57,
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I'm eating a bacon & egg sandwich. With a nice runny egg. Nice & greasy. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:09,
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I'd just like to throw my hat into the "slightly hungover" ringAlso, anyone got any recommendations for restaurants in Islington?
Googling I might go for The Elk in the Woods.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:13,
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Is this to go on a second date with the bird?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:14,
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She hot?Please be aware this is the only thing that matters.
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:41,
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Cripples are alright, so long as they're hot cripples.Like, a missing leg so long as the rest is a 10 is cool, but no Downsers.
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:43,
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Don't be ridiculous, of course that isn't all that matters.She needs to be under 30 as well
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:43,
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Anything over 30 is a MILF, which gets you bro points.You can't have a relationship with one, though. Just a few bangs.
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:44,
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Yeah, but Lighty is like 50 or summat(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:50,
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I think soshe has that "woman prepared to talk to me" allure.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:44,
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Throw one or two up it, then bin it off for something younger.*fist bump*
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:47,
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Also, having jogged around the park last night pre-boozingI'm a little sunburnt and my calves are fucking agony.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:17,
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Something something Jacob Dyer(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:27,
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the Elk is pretty good, Smokehouse for barbecue type stuff done a bit nicer than just lumps of meat,Also Antepliler (Turkish) is supposed to be good but I haven't been.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:20,
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if you want to pick the right place, ask her what kind of thing she likesproper pub, gastropub, restaurant...
there's an amazing lebanese on upper street, just after it forks by essex road. and a nice moroccan too.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:31,
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She's a woman, I'll tell her what she likes(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:48,
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it depends if you want to get laid or not...(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:49,
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women love that alpha shit according to bitter fedora wearers on the internet(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 May 2014, 11:03,
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Definitely make sure to mention where it is you choose.Islington is very close to me and I'm almost certain not to interrupt proceedings by turning up and helping myself to your chips.
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Kroney, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:42,
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Lunchor will be a breakfast brunch. Pondering potato pancakes or not.(, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:17, Reply)
I've just had a dump that was so nasty it should be treated as nuclear waste. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:33,
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Did you shit out your entire personality?(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:36,
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probably just saw his face reflected in the water when he turned to stir eagerly through it with both hands(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:38,
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YER!www.buzzfeed.com/rholdup/snarky-headlines-turned-into-normal-headlines-ow72
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:43,
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"them slags smashed into the twin towers" is brilliant(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:47,
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Right, this has been troubling me for some time nowWhat exactly is a Dannydyer?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:51,
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Which plays might I have seen him in?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:53,
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He's an 'actor' who is nearly but not quite as thick as 'Mrs tangles'(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:53,
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Bless her, she tries so hardIt's almost endearing
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:54,
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You're very narrow minded for a dirty hippie yurtster(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:49,
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i disagreemost of it is meh, but they have the occasional blinder
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 May 2014, 11:03,
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Yay, I got a UKIP letter through the post, i'm going to fill up some bottles with water.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 10:55,
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I'm not sure if I should use bottles of water, and risk postal issues, or just buy the cheapest biggest bags of rice that I can.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 11:07,
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Just get a load of stones from your garden & bag them up. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 May 2014, 11:09,
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Good man, what you gonna do with it?(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 May 2014, 11:08,
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