b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 2295385 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

RANTY FUCK BOLLOCKS
Go on, have a good old rant about something
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:21, 190 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
I'm really not that keen on the new Springwatch format
it's just a bit too "jazzy"
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:24, Reply)
Kate Humble y/n

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)
there are too many brown people in Leeds

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:25, Reply)
pasty pasty, very very pasty
he's very pasty
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)
Email isn't working, so I have even less to do than usual, and I'm more excruciatingly bored than ever and my knee hurts and it's raining.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:25, Reply)
I deleted that thread, because I realised you were talking about Columbo and not Quincy. Sorry frog xx

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:29, Reply)
Oh I don't care Doc, merely being a pedantic prick, you see, no skin off my nose.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:32, Reply)
Man up.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)
Nah sorry, Nakers might get all HR on me

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:25, Reply)
*makes note on performance review tracker*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:32, Reply)
I like this new meme

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)
Why oh why oh
spells yoyo
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:27, Reply)
Hale & Pace called.
They want their joke back.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:31, Reply)
I don't like clapping

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)
YM's teats do, though.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:43, Reply)
That explains the bruising on your face

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:46, Reply)
And my broken pelvis.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:49, Reply)

lv n
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:50, Reply)
WHY CAN'T ALL SHOPS PROVIDE THE SAME SIZE RECEIPTS?!
It would be much easier to file them.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:32, Reply)
This is the kind of rant I can get behind
Why do Sainsburys give you 75 vouchers when you spend £10?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:36, Reply)
Oh bloody hell don't.
Why can't they just put that shit on your Nectar card?

If you get stuff before the end date, it automatically gives you a zillion points or whatever.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:43, Reply)
So you have to make the effort to bring the coupon in

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:46, Reply)
Yebbut I'm goane there anyway inni? If I've got me Nectar card?
Pricks.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:47, Reply)
is this for work?
or are you the most anal person since anal sally?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)
All you wanna do is ride on Sally

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:39, Reply)
*something about going down on a challenger*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:41, Reply)
*christa mcauliffes*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:45, Reply)
Surely you would also have to buy the same number of items in each, or they'd be different lengths?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:39, Reply)
he's a man
he probably buys the same thing from every shop, ever.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)
Not always.
The flowers I gave you I nicked from a graveyard.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:42, Reply)
Different lengths is fine, but there should be some sort of international agreement that the width is the same on all receipts.
You go to Sainsbury's, and it's - what? 2 1/5 inches?

You go to Maplins you get a bloody A4 print-out.

You go to the local DIY shop and you get a 1"sq illegible thing.

THEY SHOULD MAKE THEM ALL THE SAME SIZE, SO THEY FILE NICELY.

Pricks.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:41, Reply)
There is a senior engineer that calls me almost every day for a rant about the same Bollocks.
I often don't answer the phone because it's such a waste of time listening to his Bollocks. I hate it when he calls, but sometimes he's on a nearby site and might need a hand so u have to answer sometimes and he's so dull and shit and boring and whinges. Cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)
do you often listen to men's bollocks, wp?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)
You know what I mean.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)
yes
you mean that you like to curl up next to men and cup their bollocks with your ears
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:45, Reply)
Man up.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:42, Reply)
"My knee hurts waawaa I'm a big baby MEATSNAKE waawaa"
That's an impression of you that is.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:43, Reply)
"oh no someone is phoning me bloobloobloo"
That's you Weepy Pig
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:45, Reply)
snakes don't even have knees
he be trollin' you
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:45, Reply)
i hate those advertising leaflets that fall out of magazines when you open them
it's fucking hard to pick them up on a crowded tube. it makes me determined never ever to buy anything on them. ever.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)
Just leave them.
Give the tube lot something to do for their money.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:41, Reply)
^ wisdom
If we didn't drop litter they'd be out of a job.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:48, Reply)
Women who use prams as battering rams, and aids to crossing the road. Thoughtless skanks.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)
+shopping trolleys/baskets

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)
Just throw a fit and flip the buggy over.
Claim stress, live off benefits, profit by doing back Street doctoring and selling the morphine you stole from the cabinet at the practice.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)
Charity door knocker types
Of course I'll give you my bank account number and sort code
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)
It's okay, they have a laminated badge so you know they're legit.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:44, Reply)
I might just get a poster of my bank details for the front door, to save time then

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:44, Reply)
Morons on the tube blaring music out through their headphones so loudly that the driver can hear four carriages down.
It's invariably some form of rap or dance music. It's selfish. I don't impose my tastes on others (at least on public transport). STOP IT. STOP IMMEDIATELY.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:42, Reply)
this^

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:44, Reply)
we do have to look at you, though

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:44, Reply)
Pubs shouldn't be allowed to take cards or give cashback.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:46, Reply)
Why?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:46, Reply)
^ THIS

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:47, Reply)
I assume that it takes longer and some of us need a fucking beer before we get withdrawal

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:51, Reply)
Tap&pay is quicker
whether you trust it when you're pissed is another matter
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:55, Reply)
One of our two work locals is a student pub
You get 9 of them turning up and each buying a pint on their cards
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:48, Reply)
go to the other one then

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:49, Reply)
I'm mid-drink though

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:50, Reply)
Because it's all too easy for romantic alcoholics to spend themselves into the ditch during the course of a single evening.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:58, Reply)
You can do the same with cash quite easily.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)
The variation in curry strength from restaurant to restaurant.
Some places - madras = bang on. Other places - madras = hardly any chilli.

There should be a British standard.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:49, Reply)
I can join this campaign
My jalfrezi last night was perfect
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:50, Reply)
Hottest curry I've ever eaten was a madras, was stupidly over the top
Usually I love the stuff, but this was ridiculous.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:31, Reply)
There should be a minimum height requirement to be considered fit for existence

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:50, Reply)
Most babies are quite small

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:51, Reply)
We'll just stop people under six foot from breeding.
Eventually the uselessly short will be bred out. Until then,those under six foot can occupy a lower strata in society.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:56, Reply)
Stephen Hawking is 5'5"

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)
Useless.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)
Had we taken a more enlightened stance earlier
He could have been born as a more graceful height. Simply because a genius brain was born to an inferior body, it does not follow that genius brains will not be born to superior bodies. Your post is invalid.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:03, Reply)
I'm just saying despite his short stature the world is better off with him and I believe he is fit for existence

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:28, Reply)
I'm not advocating murder, simply an improved breeding programme
to ensure a better tomorrow.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:41, Reply)
But does Stephen Hawking have to join the lower strata.

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:01, Reply)
Of course.
We will milk the science from him. He'll barely notice a difference
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:02, Reply)
That's because he's sat down

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)
I was going to put a comment about short people being made to work in the sewers
then I thought of looking for an image of Lance Henriksen in a pipe to accompany it

and then I found THIS MASTERPIECE
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)

sm tall compared to battered
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:56, Reply)
any cunt who can't be bothered to use their indicators should be banned from driving 4 EVAR

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:55, Reply)
this^
Also un-needed cones/traffic lights. Stuck for 10 mins yesterday on a 5 minute drive
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:56, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-aWWkMHiBo&feature=kp
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 11:59, Reply)
My mate's wife worked on Spitting Image

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:04, Reply)
Telesales, particularly those about PPI.
I am registered with the telephone preference service. This means you're not supposed to call me. You're particularly not meant to call me when I'm having a shit, eating my supper, or having one off the wrist.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:00, Reply)
It must be hard for them to find a time when you aren't indulging in one of these three things.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:03, Reply)
Fair point.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:03, Reply)
he does them all at once

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:08, Reply)
So you admit that men can multi-task?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:09, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:09, Reply)
you needn't deny it
we all know it's true
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:12, Reply)
Problem with TPS is it only "works" on calls from UK numbers
all the foreign call centres take no notice.

Caller ID works better, unless you have ex-directory friends.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:04, Reply)
1) Disable ringer on landline, only wankers trying to hawk shit phone those these days.
2)Don't answer your mobile to withheld /0845/unknown non-local numbers. Google them and find out who they are; If it's someone important like your bank etc, they'll write to you.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:12, Reply)
I solve this by not answering unknown numbers

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:04, Reply)
I have to, because of work and more importantly, potential work.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:05, Reply)
Oh. Yeah.
I get a lot of this on my work phone.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:08, Reply)
My call reject list for my mobile is extensive.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:05, Reply)
Hellosir. Do you know you are entitled to claim...
Blame the companies that sell your data.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:05, Reply)
^inside knowledge

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:06, Reply)
*taps nose*

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:11, Reply)
And the companies (including some UK ones) who don't surpress their data against the TPS list.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:06, Reply)
Green Deal ones are worse than PPI these days

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:08, Reply)
Not had them yet. what do they do?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:12, Reply)
Try and get you to have a new boiler/cavity wall insulation etc
cos "you can get a grant from the Government".
This is horseshit, it's a loan which you pay back using the "savings" you will allegedly make on your energy bill once said work is done......which aren't guaranteed, just estimated.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:18, Reply)
My housemate worked on one of them for a bit, offering a new set of insulation
Said it was actually free, but only if you fit about 28 different criteria.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:33, Reply)
British gas put loft insulation and a new boiler in ours for free.
I was very suspicious, but have yet to have it come back on me.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:38, Reply)
So on benefits, then.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:00, Reply)
I certainly don't!

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:12, Reply)
I get this shite all the time. I work from home so I very rarely answer the house phone before about 8pm.
If it's not PPI, it's the 'Windows Maintenance Team' or it's some insulation bollocks.

Whenever I mention the TPS they either give me the old "but we're not trying to sell you anything, this is just for marketing purposes" routine or they just hang up.

The pricks.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:38, Reply)
I've never had one of those 'windows maintenance team' calls.
As an IT wanker, I reckon I could have a bit of fun.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:13, Reply)
I am an IT wanker
And I most certainly do.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 3 Jun 2014, 14:03, Reply)
They're ace
The last one I had insisted Linux ran under Windows....after I'd spent as much time as possible insisting that my laptop didn't have a start button (Linux Mint is other way up to Windows for some menus) and generally pretending to be dumb, then telling her I was running Linux.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 14:08, Reply)
Facebook is 'fucking shit'
/ac
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:15, Reply)
I've eaten my lunch and I'm still starving
:o(
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:26, Reply)
Thats way one of my desk drawers is full of snacks
and I'm fucking fat.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:29, Reply)
Please refrain from keeping food in your footstool as this can attract mice and rats
Cupboards for cereal are provided on the staff kitchens if you need them.
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:31, Reply)
I might have to eat noodles too

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:33, Reply)
I've had a salad with bulgur wheat. Am I gay?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
Yes
Yes you are
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:38, Reply)
:(( If I get a doner for dinner,will this cure me?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:40, Reply)
probably
get a take
n z
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:43, Reply)
I'm sick to fucking death of twitter.
Having to operate the company one is driving me up the wall.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:33, Reply)
You need to follow Grace

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:34, Reply)
Jones?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:34, Reply)
Amazing?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:34, Reply)
who?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:34, Reply)
Dozer's buttplug

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
could there be a less appropriate name for it than grace?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:42, Reply)
grace in yer brown place

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:45, Reply)
the grace isn't always browner on the other side....

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:02, Reply)
Public Domains lesser known track

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:02, Reply)
and @TimStilton

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
Of course

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:38, Reply)
I hardly ever go on twitter but since I added you lot there loads in my notifications
sad wankers
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:03, Reply)
Please note that use of social media is banned by our reasonable usage policy for the internet

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:13, Reply)
hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:17, Reply)
I've had to do loads of work and it's shit.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:34, Reply)
should have tried harder, shouldn't you?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
I managed shitloads yesterday, but I'm badly flagging today.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
I have done very little, it's nice how the world evens it all out.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)
I'm going to make up for it by doing nothing for the rest of the day.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:41, Reply)
okay well I will do some work this afternoon - I am now...imagine that!!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:43, Reply)
I can't

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:13, Reply)
It's okay I have stopped again now

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:13, Reply)
I'm still in bed on holiday.
My Mrs brought me brunch in bed. I learned how to photograph water. Life blows.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:43, Reply)
dumbarse american bitch (wisconsin blonde, not new york black lady) has given out my fucking email address for replies to her fucking cunt kid's 6th birthday party
so far i have painstakingly replied to 15 of her cunt friends to explain that they have the wrong address, as i don't want to think of a cunt kid missing a cunt party.

not one of the fuckers has bothered to reply and say, thanks. thanks for helping a total stranger. it's not my fault their friend is fucking retarded and can't spell her own fucking email address correctly. cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:48, Reply)
Reply to any further emails as follows: -
Sorry, you were invited in error. You cannot come to the party as I believe that your child may be illegitimate.

Love,

Blah blah blah.
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:50, Reply)
Email her and call her a cunt

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 12:56, Reply)
Puit the party on Facebook and see if it goes 'viral'

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:00, Reply)
I like this.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:02, Reply)
None of these replies are subtle enough
Simply reply to them all, thanking them for their response and then apologise because you put the wrong date on the invitation and it should have been the following day, hope you can still make it!
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:03, Reply)
day before would be better

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:07, Reply)
No it wouldn't.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:09, Reply)
if you put it a day late the mrs will simply call every on the day when they don't turn up
a day early and thyey'll all turn up expectainga party, but there WON@T BE A PARTY JUSTB A HOLE IN THE GOURND ANS CYRING CHILD
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:12, Reply)
I had a counter argument here, but then I realised I can't be bothered with this hypothetical situation.
Suffice to say, my way is better.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:14, Reply)
i agree

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:15, Reply)
MY TWO

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:18, Reply)
+BRAIN CELLS

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:29, Reply)
+ mums.
/Boyce.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:36, Reply)
I now have some shit sweets so this afternoon is looking up

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:29, Reply)
Alright crow, I got three of those Cadbury banana bars the other day, I only had one and the other two have vanished.
It can't have been Swipe that ate them as she calls me 'bent' for liking banana flavoured things. It's such a mystery!
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:32, Reply)
who got them?
i seem to remember swipe paid for them and was thus entitled to distribute them to poor starving children as she saw fit.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:33, Reply)
I WISH I WAS DEAD!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:34, Reply)
IT COULD BE ARRANGED

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:39, Reply)
It's okay I just bought one.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:50, Reply)
She sounds like a bit of a foodwrong.

(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:34, Reply)
Imagine not liking 'nanas!!! What a twit.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:35, Reply)
Unbelievable.
Not even as a food?
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:37, Reply)
They are rather "nom"

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:41, Reply)
Smiley faeces or fudge?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:34, Reply)
I have:
Cheese
Baked beans
Cheese
Toast.

x 2
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:37, Reply)
Why cheese twice x2?
or are these layers of a sandwich?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:41, Reply)
Stealth cheese

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:42, Reply)
You can never have enough cheese.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:43, Reply)
+, Gromit

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:43, Reply)
One of my favourit e nibbles, cheese, crackers and nuts.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:45, Reply)
Thats easy for you to say

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:45, Reply)
Cbeese is better though.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:46, Reply)
Of course
cbeese FTW
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:46, Reply)
depends who's doing the catwring I guess

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:46, Reply)
Incorrect electricals in a feline can be very dangerous

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:47, Reply)
They need 9 live wires, for a start

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:49, Reply)
Cat5

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:50, Reply)
LTI

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:51, Reply)
\o/

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:51, Reply)
Or powerfeline networking
CAT N over IP
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:54, Reply)
Spicy chicken sandwich + jelly fangs + strawberry pencils

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:41, Reply)
Rolo biscuits are excellent, good for a nommy sugar rush.But why not bigger? That's my main moan.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 13:43, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1