Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Excellent, thanksJust had a proper cup of tea made with leaves not those grotty teabags, so all is right with the world.
How's you?
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 15:36, Reply)
I amIbuprofen has helped remarkably well with my Achilles woes. I am overjoyed at this.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 15:44,
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^ man keeps repeating his injury woes whilst saying how he will solider on sounds familiar ^(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 15:55, Reply)
That prick sportscrow was saying something similar this morning(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 15:58,
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I'm not normally a taker of tablets but I'm genuinely shocked at how well they have helped(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:06,
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Anti-inflammatory in reducing inflammation shocker(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:11,
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It wasn't inflamed, just fucking painful(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:13,
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Hmm I wonder what could possibly have been causing that pain...(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:13,
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I had to take anti-inflammatorys for my bollocks when I got the mumps.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:33,
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More than enough large-breasted, screeching harridans in your life, eh?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:11,
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I have pondered this and I agree with you Mr. SnakeI just don't think I could, it is a similar thing to Madonna (back in the day before she had arms like a scaffolder)
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:19, Reply)
You'd have to move her nuts out of the way first(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:20,
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Yeah, I'd have a goas long as she promised not to speak
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:05,
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This would be quite tricky.She would have to remain completely silent. Even then I'm not sure I could achieve the requisite wood whilst looking at her vacant coupon*.
*Number 76 in the series "Fister teaches you southern nancies some Scots' words". Coupon: (dismissive) face, e.g. "ye should hae seen the nick o' her coupon when ah' wiped my boabie on her curtains".
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:14, Reply)
Aye Doric is pretty brutal.I could just about follow Trawlermen (or whatever it was called) without the subtitles.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:27, Reply)
It's such a beautiful language(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:16,
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We're dreamers and romantics up here Tangers."Brace yersel hen ahm goan in dry"
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:21, Reply)
i wouldn't knowi only go there to catch planes.
lol shitland.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:43,
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you seem to know a lot about itbut then again, i guess wythey looks like knightsbridge if you live in shitland
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:54,
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Edinburgh house prices are higher than most - even south of the borderBeing an estate agent I'd have thought you'd have known that.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:10, Reply)
you can try your best to roll it in glitterbut it's still a great big stinking turd
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:12,
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^^Has been to London and can confirm that it's a stinking cesspit of orangutans and toothless pakis^^(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:17, Reply)
lol shitland's white knight on his shitty brown horse(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:19,
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Turn her overProblem solved
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:19,
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My point is that you said "teachs some Scots words" And it comes from the old French "to cut" you could have said Scots usage of words or slang.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:33, Reply)
A Scots' word = a word used as part of the Scots languageTry not to overthink it old boy.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:35, Reply)
I was brought up in Dumfries and spent a couple of summers working in Carlislewhich is like fucking New York if you come from Shitehaven.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:37, Reply)
I've got absolutely no idea BonzersIt's just the local lingo, innit?
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:29, Reply)
Edinburgh isnt scotland though mateI have been trying to figure it -coupon book = look - maybe
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:31, Reply)
AHL MARK YOUR FUGGIN COUPON IN A MINUTE SONNY(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:32,
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Looks it's not fucking cock-er-knee rhyming slangDon't try to fucking understand it, FFS.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:34, Reply)
Ok then, tell me where BAWBAG and CUNTYBAWSACKS comes from then Dr fucking Johnson?*straightens tie*
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:36, Reply)
bawbagis ballbag said by someone with a speech impediment, aka scottish accent
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:39,
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Coming from someone who I imagine speaking like the 3rd Gallagher brother, this is fucking priceless.SUNSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEE
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:43, Reply)
you do know there is a third gallagher brother already, don't you?but no, wrong. i learned to speak in yorkshire, so sounded like a farmer, then we moved to buckinghamshire when i was 4. and overnight i turned into the queen, because the other little girls at school were shocked when i said "plum" like a northerner.
something to help you with those lonely late night wank fests.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:53,
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tl;dr - I was mercilessly bullied and had to change to blend in with all the other brats.(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:12, Reply)
it was the most middle class bullying ever"the new girl in our class says PLUM"
"no she doesn't"
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:12,
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i got much worse bullying when i moved up north again, years laterteachers always made me read everything out loud because they liked the accent.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:18,
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They made you read?That's the fucking worst bullying I've ever heard of. How on earth did they get away with it?
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:22, Reply)
Baw is clearly the droning voice of the ill educated trying to say BallBall bag becomes BAWBAG when said by chavs (Or Ned as I believe you chaps call them) Ball Bag has been used for many years to describe a mans testes,
CUNTYBAWSACKS will have the same origin except that sack has transposed Bag and Cunty- a derivation of the old English Quint to describe a vagina and that has then been turned into a portmanteau...
*DROPS THE MIKE*
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:41, Reply)
RUMBLEDAlways use 12 sentences when 1 will do that's day 1 of lawyer school
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:57, Reply)
yes, if you went in 1840you wouldn't get very far these days if you are working to a fixed fee or having to justify your time to the court.
stick to computers, there's a good lad.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:58,
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^works for a shit law firm that isnt good enough to charge exorbitant prices^ (, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:02, Reply)
you get what you pay foranyone who thinks the fees are "exorbitant" is welcome to go to a smaller, shittier firm. and drown in their own bitterness and lack of success.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:04,
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Bit like hookers innitdo you drop £2k on a tasty one or just have a crywank
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:06, Reply)
You pay more an hour to get access to PI insurance with bigger limits. (, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:07, Reply)
typical insurers... making a fortune out of the competent...(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:09,
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I imagine it'd be like sticking your cock into a soggy carrier bag. So, yes.
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Muns, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:16,
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She's seen more helmets than Nuremberg so I'd imagine she'd be quite the expert(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:18,
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I bet her arsehole looks in a better condition than her minge at this time of her life. (
Muns, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:21,
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Terribly bullying of Peter Andre(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:21,
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I doubt itShe fears coughing as she has no tension left back there
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:27, Reply)
Have you seen the icebucketchallenge bloke who fudged his drawers?He's in his back garden with just a pair of white shorts on, with swimming goggles and armbands.
"Dad, you've fucking shat yourself"
Absolutely fucking brilliant.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:32, Reply)
I think its a fakeas he seems to back into the chair before
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:34,
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Entirely possible, but it was funny as fuck. My 2 were in hystericsYou cannae beat a good jobbie joke.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:40, Reply)
I sound more like George Clark than Jimmy(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:47,
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Yeah', but not without a jonny. I dont' wanna be paying mantainance on a spacker.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:26,
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No I would not.I would risk being beaten up by Scientologists for a go on Katie Holmes, though.
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Kroney, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:50,
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I'm still on a train.(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:19,
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Somewhere I have heard this before(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:25,
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he can't complainbecause he's dead
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:30,
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urghI've been ice bucket challenged, but I find the whole thing dull - like a joke that just needed to go away some time ago. Can I just say fuck off and then give some money to a totally different charity? Currently opting for ignoring it
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:29,
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it's the "you don't have to be mad to work here but it helps!"of the facebook world
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:31,
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it's just boringdoes anyone even watch those videos now? We know what happens, people get wet and a bit cold. woo
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:35,
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When I was nominated, I donated to Macmillan without doing the challenge. I then challenged three people to donate to the charity of their choice without making a tit of themselves.
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Muns, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:33,
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i might do something like thisi don't mind making a tit of myself, I'd just rather be more original
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:36,
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Just ignore itI only did mine as the kids thought it would be funny
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:34,
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Thats entirely down to me being MASSIVE DRUG ADDICT(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:38,
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Just reply with a link to WaterAid and say you won't waste water whilst for foreigns are thirsty.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:35,
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i love wateraid, they are acebut that argument is stupid - toilets flush more clean water in one go than those buckets contain
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:36,
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Well fill your bucket with bleach and then tip it over your head, then.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:38,
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but but my hair will go blonde!(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:38,
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It would match your face though(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:39,
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truei might look like I've tanned
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:40,
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Do this.37.media.tumblr.com/623530a1e1f698aa807d0b4f9e9cd870/tumblr_nax843DLK41qdlh1io1_r1_400.gif
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Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:36,
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that hurts to watch(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:37,
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I found it funny until someone pointed out how much his head bends.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:37,
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37.media.tumblr.com/623530a1e1f698aa807d0b4f9e9cd870/tumblr_nax843DLK41qdlh1io1_r1_400.gif
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Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:39,
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You on some gaylord browser?(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:58,
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can you make it go away now, please?(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:40,
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It almost looks like his head falls off(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:37,
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lol!!That was well deserved I have to say.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:43,
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That looks like he properly hurt himselfHas anyone else noticed You've been Framed getting a bit more nasty recently, with car crashes and the like.
I keep expecting them to show 9/11 footage.
(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:59, Reply)
Ive noticed how they still show stuff from the 80's and rehashed clipsEven though they must get sent loads of new stuff.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:37,
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Patrick Stewart is the only person to do this right.If I get a nomination, that is how I'll do it.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:43,
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I saw that. Further proof that Stewart is a dappa.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:45,
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Oh no. did you? I thought it would have been too cool for you.
AND THERE'S A PUN IN THERE TOO!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:51,
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You loved it. How many likes on your Facefuck?(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 17:02,
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oh godand you have to nominate, too, which just perpetuates the lameness
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:53,
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Some cunt has been showing everyone icebucket challenges all afternoon now. It's beginning to grate.(, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:49, Reply)
just had a client called Joshua NewdickIm taking it that he's Jewish and this is a reference to circumcision.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:50,
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nahhe used to be a lady
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 16:53,
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