So I'm a total chavette.
Tell me something about you.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:19, 184 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a 28 year-old bruise on my eyeball.
There you go.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:22, Reply)

oooooooh do tell

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:26, Reply)

When I was toddling
I ran eye first into the corner of my grandma's big chunky marble table. Up until I was 16 I could burst all the blood vessels in it as a party trick but the bruise has never left.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:30, Reply)

that totally skeeves me out

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:31, Reply)

It's fine now
But I'm funny with eye trauma in horror now. *ick*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:33, Reply)

yeah, fuck that
anything involving eyes or fingernails makes me shudder
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:34, Reply)

That bit in 28 Weeks Later
Where the woman is strapped to the gurney and Robert Carlyle sticks his thumbs in her eyes. *Wuuuuuggghh*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:37, Reply)

oh, that brings me to the third
people vomitting blood...I didn't get 5 minutes into that film
or was it 28 days later?
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:47, Reply)

Both I think!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:49, Reply)

AGREED!!!
Anytime that bodily fluids are coming out of any orifice, I'm half-way into a "sympathetic" (they CALL it that, but I hardly have any "sympathy" for the fuckers who put that on film!!!) barf-o-rama. Spitting, people who do that nasty yo-yo thing with their phlegmy spit and suck it back up into their mouths after it's gone cold (GAG!! RETCH!!! HEAVE!!!! SPEW!!!!! CHOKE!!!!!!), realistic showing of actual vomiting (as opposed to those hose-up-the-sleeve food-coloring-and-loose-porridge "puke," that's just stoopid), FAR-TOOOOOO-REALISTIC blood (only the blood of my nearest & dearest makes me barf, though --- seen plenty of mine & others', and not a twitch), or any other substances which may or may not naturally spew/leak/thunk out of a human orifice.

I'm not a fainting little violet, I've worked in commercial radio and a porn store at the same fucking time, along with being a retired half-assed underpaid K-Mart blue-light-special "dominatrix," I'm pretty hard to shock. But seeing people expectorate, evacuate, or otherwise add too much moisture to the planet --- pure, vicious, lizard-brain repulsion & full-body dry-heave.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:02, Reply)

My right leg is full of metal pins and plates

( Peej, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:26, Reply)

like RoboCop?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:34, Reply)

Yes
My gun pops out from the side.
( Peej, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:47, Reply)

Metal collections
I made the pins out of my left knee into earrings, and the salvaged/broken parts from my FIRST spine surgery (held up great for 5 years, then came Katrina!) are currently being worked into a LOVERLY tasseled necklace, embellished by two tiny wooden violins, for all of the fuckers who'll look at my hardware and do that "world's tiniest violin" shtick.

If I can EVER find a fucking neurosurgeon or ortho specialist who'll remove the THIRD set of FLAWED FUCKING HARDWARE (an allegedly "titanium" plate riveted to the front of the lumbar & sacral spine, held up great for 11 months, THEN CAME HURRICANE GUSTAV!!! I was a very bad person in a past life... maybe Maggie Thatcher... oh, fuck, it's STILL ALIVE, isn't it?!?!!) and do something to FINALLY, PERMANENTLY AFFIX MY CRUMBLING SARCOIDOSIS-AND-ARTHRITIS-RIDDLED SPINE TO *SOMETHING* THAT ACTUALLY STAYS ATTACHED TO THE FUCKER... then I'll make a loverly enormous pendant out of the plate that is currently thunking around and cluttering-up my entire rear-pelvic/tailbone region. And yes, the drugs (which will prolly kill me wif liver and/or pancreatic cancer; on & off the fuckers cold-turkey repeatedly over TWELVE YEARS) stopped "working" about 8 years ago.

And I want that leg-gun thing, too. And the loverly head-helmet that rebounds other people's bullets. The only reason that I don't have a gun now (aside from money) is BECAUSE I WOULD USE IT. ***IN***TRAFFIC***.

On a more pleasurable note, enjoy this clip: The REAL Terminator, aka "Ms. Julia Sugarbaker" of "Designing Women" fame, played inimitably and perfectly by the newly-late Mrs. Dixie Carter: (while I in no way endorse or approve of pageant "culture" or any of the negative views toward & about women that it creates, the clip is WORTH IT, just for the adrenaline rush!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV86kehwkc0
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:16, Reply)

I think a lesson can be learned here.
Stay the hell away from hurricanes.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:27, Reply)

I miss physical contact more than I miss cigarettes.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:28, Reply)

I miss physical contact.
I have to opportunity to have some next weekend but I'm not entirely sure I'm going to go for it.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:32, Reply)

Ah, I'm missing physical contact as well
Been six weeks so the libido is calming down just a little thankfully. Sick of pawing the ground every time a woman walks past.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:34, Reply)

oh man
it's been 6 months for me, I totally swore off drunken slagging.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:35, Reply)

I need to get back on it :)

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:36, Reply)

Almost three years.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:36, Reply)

"Holy shit dude, you got to get on that!"

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:38, Reply)

I'm scared!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:40, Reply)

Don't blame you.
I'm trying to think of any situation in my daily life I may get the chance to meet women. Fuck, I'm a sad sod.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:41, Reply)

The three of us should go out slagging together

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:46, Reply)

Lets go slagging!
Meh. I've noticed it's far easier if you don't go looking for it.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:51, Reply)

that's funny because I haven't been looking for it and guess what, I haven't gotten it either

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:53, Reply)

This.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:54, Reply)

bloody hell
excluding random dates, it's been two years since I was in a proper relationship. I hadn't really totted it up until now :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:07, Reply)

This all saddens me.

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:08, Reply)

Hence the 'yikes' at the end of my post down there...

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:13, Reply)

:(
I think I'm ready to get back into the game, but that's easier said than done
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:17, Reply)

What is really sad
I did the massive questionnaire on eHarmony and they said, 'Sorry, we can't match you with anyone'! How bad is that? Fuck off freakboy essentially.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:18, Reply)

I got that as well

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:18, Reply)

Maybe they tell everyone that dosn't look like Brad or Angelina to fuck off
Yes, that must be it. La lalala llala. *happy thoughts*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:21, Reply)

Maybe I should give it a go.
Pffft!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:22, Reply)

It didn't require a photo :(
my personality must be shit
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:24, Reply)

Your personality's doing just fine.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:26, Reply)

It'll be out of bandages
any time soon
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:26, Reply)

If yer personality were "shit"...
...would you've been blessed by the presence of a little ray of sunshine like ME in your b3tard mail?

(that'd be my lame attempt at humor... hope that it helps at some point...)
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:41, Reply)

I thought you submitted a photo after the questions?
maybe your answers scream 'rapist'
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:24, Reply)

to be fair
mine would probably do the same
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:29, Reply)

the b3ta rapist club
banned from eharmony for rapey tendancies
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:31, Reply)

My ex always said I had rapey tricks
I should point out this was down to my tendency to be naked every time she had turned round for five seconds rather than any acts of rape.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:36, Reply)

I like this
I wish I had a boyfriend that did this
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

She pretended not to like it
She was awesome. Funny and naughty in equal measures.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:53, Reply)

DAMMIT, AMBERL!!!!!!
my reply to your earlier post about "proper dates" got pushed to the bottom of the page and utterly cocked-up the whole MARGIN of the thread!!!

Sorry, all, no intention to fuck up THAT BADLY, or fuck-up at all.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:28, Reply)

though it may make you sad and/or lonesome, hon...
...please don't think that being SINGLE is a FLAW. It's not wasted time, if you've been working on yourself and learning important things about the world in that time.

I used to go out and pick up random pretty boys just for the physical contact, something to approximate "affection," did it for YEARS, and y'know what? Not ONCE was the lay worth shaving my legs, save for The Boy, the longest 2 years of my life (total man-slut bisexual whoooooore), and the LOVERLY 21-year-old man that my roommate brought to my 30th b-day party as a sort of "gift"... ohhhh, HE was FUN! The sex, meh, not the best part, but the best part was that there were so many OTHER parts that were a HOOT! Great hickey, too.

A coupla fond memories, several hundred nightmares, and so many shouldn't-haves... Glad to be retired, honestly. Yeah, I miss a good snogg and the occasional snuggle (if the fucker isn't hogging the covers or farting in bed), but I still continue to draw breath. Not sure WHY this body even vaguely "functions" at this point, or how, but it does, like it or not. Just damned grateful that my dear friend Ted made sure, after Hurricane Gustav, that I will NEVER go without MOSQUITO NETTING!!! Living outdoors may not be THAT bad, eh? Imagine the peace & quiet once I'm away from these bellowing fucktarded drunks (and yes, the hard-core drunks DO drink kerosene if they can't buy generic vodka or gin!), the shrieky/idiotic crack whores and their johns-du-noir, the stinky stoners who don't share or EVER SHUT THE FUCK UP, the pedophiles, the yelling/non-housebroken DEMON-SPAWN of the aforementioned crack whores PLUS the screaming, mewling brats of the illegally-run "daycare" cunts in a RESIDENTIAL BUILDING FOR DISABLED ADULTS.

THOSE motherfuckers, I will not miss. Watching TV, yeah, but I can charge-up the 'puter @ the library, but don't have a wifi card. /Bellyaching-like-a-little-bitch session end.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:26, Reply)

Noel! You should have said
I was well up for it.
( Peej, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:33, Reply)

I'm a bit of a slut for I've been on dates with three different guys in the last week

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:31, Reply)

a bit of
( Peej, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:33, Reply)

pfft

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:37, Reply)

um, I think it only makes you a bit of a slut if you've slept with all of them this week,

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:33, Reply)

Ah then I take back my previous comment
I thought she'd slept with them all. Oops
( Peej, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:34, Reply)

Nope just one

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:36, Reply)

Not even that
You can do what you want with your body. Just don´t give them false hopes.

And don´t charge them, that´d make you a proper slut.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:44, Reply)

That's very big of you to give Becks permision to play off three different guys.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:09, Reply)

It'd be playing them off
if she was taking it further than a date i.e. she had 3 boyfriends
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:10, Reply)

She might need a few dates with each in order to decide

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:14, Reply)

She might want just one though
Its ok though, he wants me too :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:17, Reply)

excellent
I'm very happy for you
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:19, Reply)

GET IN!
Oh get the fuck in!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:20, Reply)

THEY DON'T WANT THE COW WHEN THEY CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE, BECKY
gawd
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:25, Reply)

That's why I didn't fuck him. I fucked someone else
Guaranteed way to not see someone again if you fuck them on the first date.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:33, Reply)

aw shit son
*gives you mad props*
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:35, Reply)

I like the bit when shaun conoly walks away and nicolas cage yells "FREEZE ! FBI !" and pulls his gun on him and then shaun grabs the gun, points it to nicolas's face and goes "Not with the safety on" and then on nick's radio it says "Have you resolved th
e situation" and he replies "No, he's got all the guns now".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:21, Reply)

I searched all my Freeview channels for the Nicholas Cage and Sean Connery extravaganza you told me was on
and was severely disappointed when I couldn't find it. Why would you do this to your fellow man, Gonz? Why?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:25, Reply)

The Rock is on SkyShowcaseHD.
I'm not sure why I bothered starting to troll, but I lost heart in it after 3 minutes.

I don't know whats wrong with me these days =(
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:29, Reply)

You need The Fire, young man.
Get yourself over to /talk and make a joke about Friz's baby.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:31, Reply)

that's not a slut
@ABBERACION:

That's a WHORE.

Sluts do it for fun, whores do it for money.

Biggggg difference.

Tried-on the "sugar-daddy" old-geezer gimmick once, in a bind financially, despite working 2 jobs at the time and spending NOTHING on FUN or clothes or anything besides food or bills...

Took me SIX HOURS to get out of the bathtub, I felt so fucking filthy, BECAUSE I FELT LIKE A FUCKING ***WHORE***.

Changed my phone number so that the 67-year-old millionaire (yup, verifiable) wouldn't call and whine into my answering machine anymore, the creepy bastard. I think that he'd have been a full-on girl-raping PEDOPHILE if he didn't have so much to lose. And yes, IT *IS* A CONSCIOUS CHOICE TO BECOME A PREDATOR.

Anyway, I never got a dime out of it, except for a mediocre lunch and a bottle of wine, and THE. WORST. EXCUSE. FOR. "SEX". EVER. PERPETRATED. THIS. SIDE. OF. NECROPHILIA.

Sluts: FUN!

Whores: Commerce. Selling your soul alongside your cunt.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 7:51, Reply)

Me and me mates have got £58.37 between us, what can we expect for this sort of money?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 9:30, Reply)

My toes often click as I walk
If any of you are watching the debate, get on Slapometer to see what others are thinking.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:53, Reply)

my eye makes a squishy noise when I rub it

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:57, Reply)

*shudders*
Eyes again!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 20:58, Reply)

I NO!

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:00, Reply)

ARRRGGHHH!!!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:08, Reply)

I have never seen "Bambi"
And I am a uni champion poker player.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:06, Reply)

Hot teenage Jew, ITV1!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:10, Reply)

Trans-Am wheel-arch nostrils, Quest!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:14, Reply)

Rimmer?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:16, Reply)

was thinking that
nostrils like two railway tunnels
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:17, Reply)

Hahahaha
He looked like the younger brother of that Gutenplan chap who kicked arse on Uni Challenge.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:16, Reply)

Blessed are the geeks

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:18, Reply)

For they shall invent Microsoft
and inherit the Earth
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:19, Reply)

and my adoration

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:19, Reply)

:-)

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:21, Reply)

Oh, isn't that nice, they have a hell of a time.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Shut up, Bignose

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Where are you from, nose city?

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:40, Reply)

I'll take you the fuckin cleaners, mate...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:41, Reply)

"I'M ROOTA AND SO'S MY WIFE!"

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:50, Reply)

He's referring to all manufacturers of dairy products...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:51, Reply)

All right, no one is to stone *anyone* until I blow this whistle. Even... and I want to make this absolutely clear... even if they do say, "Jehovah. "
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:53, Reply)

oh, just kill ALL the fun, whydontcha?!?!?!
Those of us without satellite or cable have to entertain ourselves SOMEHOW, dammit, and those cockbites bang on my door and drag me outta bed, THEY DON'T GET STONED, THEY GET AN ALUMINUM TEE-BALL BAT!*

*(Murkin warm-up to "proper" baseball, for tots to tee-off a prop; bequested to me by my lovely, brilliant, brave and hilarious late nephew, for that specific reason --- "Keep it by the bed, ALWAYS!" --- "Tater.")
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:01, Reply)

Gutenplan v Paxman
Fight of the century. Forget Haye v Klitschko.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:36, Reply)

My flatmate started mocking him
Then felt bad when he saw he was a Jew.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:17, Reply)

Are you two having quality time?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:23, Reply)

Damn straight
He's reasonably off his face on haribo and lounging on the couch. I am not.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:24, Reply)

But I'm 26 =/

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:30, Reply)

And I'm not on telly.
=/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:30, Reply)

If you were, and you had on your yarmulke, I'd have been buzzing

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:34, Reply)

You really should switch that thing off.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:35, Reply)

Haha, my mate told his new flatmate (also my friend)
that every time she buzzed up, it made lines go across his computer.
Poor girl was horrified.
He was lying, obviously.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

*brings it out of room, holds up to screen*
Is it doing it now?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:40, Reply)

Shiiiiiiit

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

yarma-wha?
*Sigh*, people go to bed with gonz, and they wake up with Paul.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Kippah?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Kupple? (not sure how it's spelt), the head-cap thing?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

Yeah.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:50, Reply)

*Does sexy dance*
You can leeave your kupple on.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:53, Reply)

I like mint-scented shampoo
in fact all mint body products get a thumbs up
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:11, Reply)

They make my bits tingle.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:15, Reply)

Exactly

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:16, Reply)

I don't quite like mint anything.

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:23, Reply)

you don't like mint?
:(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:25, Reply)

hmm...well...my process of thought went like this
"yeah, mint shampoo is probably alright, but if you get it in your eyes it'll burn really bad"
"I've used mint body wash and it made my bits tingly and hurty, I don't like that"
"I don't like mint tea, it's way fucking nasty"
"I hate mint gum, the flavor sticks to your tongue for fucking ages and makes my cigarettes taste nasty"
"Gawd, Mint sucks. I hate it"
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:27, Reply)

that's fair enough
do you like the actual smell of mint though?
Edit: or indeed mojitos
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:29, Reply)

eurgh no
and cinammon
gawd I hate cinnamon scented stuff
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:32, Reply)

I agree on
cinnammon. Especially cinnamon scented gum. Disgusting
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:34, Reply)

Cinnamon is mint!
No, wait...
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

but I don't really like the typical flowery or fruity scents either.
I like woodsy, watery, exotic stuff.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

must make it hard to find perfume

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:39, Reply)

well it's not really

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

seems to be a lot of flowery/fruity stuff
out there, and a lot of stuff based on it.

Though I will be honest. There are surprisingly few mint based perfumes
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:46, Reply)

there is, yeah, but there's the same amount of other stuff I think
I think it's that typically people look for what they like, if you like the flowery stuff that's what you'll look for and not the musky stuff
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:53, Reply)

Amberl: "HATE" cinnamon?!?!?!
I didn't know that that was physically or psychologically possible.

It helps keep yer blood sugar down, it makes damned near anything but spaghetti taste & smell better, and it's just so damned NUMMY!!!!!!

*sigh*

This makes me sad. No rational reason for it, just does. It's like saying that you don't like Whittaker's dark chocolate from New Zealand, THE MOST PERFECT FOOD ON EARTH. Or that you don't like puppies or kittens or good books.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:09, Reply)

Cinnamon is for perverts and Americans.
I'm surprised you don't like it, Kristine. I have noticed that Americans have Cinnamon on everything*.

*Warning! Sweeping generalisation!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

especially bagels

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:39, Reply)

fuck off I do not have cinnamon on any fucking thing
I've had to school the dykes at home, gawd those bitches have cinnamon everything, and everytime I say "eugh cinnamon" they're all "You don't like cinnamon?" like everyone fucking loves the shit
fuck right off
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:41, Reply)

You are my favourite American.
KRISTINE IS BETTER THAN OBAMA.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:49, Reply)

I don't think I was supposed to be born over here.

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:54, Reply)

RE: "Cinnamon is for perverts and Americans."
I beg your pardon, madame, as that generalization would tend to piss off every ethnicity in this country, who all use it differently but love it equally, across the board.

At least we like FLAVOR in our food, instead of TREACLE.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:11, Reply)

Madame!
Spot-on, that.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:14, Reply)

I FUCKING HATE mint toothpaste
and all the cunts are chock-full of fucking minty mint fucking mint!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:29, Reply)

you can buy
strawberry flavour child toothpaste, and bubblegum
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Yes, and every time I do the Real Man inside me dies a little bit.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:33, Reply)

My real man died ages ago
trying to deliver a box of Milk Tray
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:34, Reply)

yeah but they're not as good on adults teeth
whitening toothpaste isn't so bad, it's got more of a bleach flavour than mint

gawd I hate mint

my friends even say "Is it minty" because I always ask before accepting gum, if it's minty it can fuck right off
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:34, Reply)

And bicarbonate of sofa can fuck right off n'all.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:35, Reply)

yeah sofas can fuck off...no I quite like sofas

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:37, Reply)

Hahaha!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Haha bloody predictive text and child-based distractions.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

RE: MINT BATH & OTHER PRODUCTS/AMBERL --- Lavendar
Bath, bed, laundry, incense, all things restful & calming.

And sandalwood and genuine cedar --- my most favorite incenses.

Need to get off my ass and boil-up a big pot of herbal tea, with licorice root and rose hips and blackberry leaves and dandelion root and all other good things, including decaffeinated green tea.

Go ahead, laugh, call me a fucking hippie, I don't care, it makes this racked-to-fuck-and-back ol' hoopty of a body feel better, so nyeh. And if you bottle & refrigerate it, it's a smashing "energy" drink minus the speed that damages yer nerves & middle ear. So there.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:05, Reply)

I am a robot in disguise.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:34, Reply)

TRANSFORMERS!

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:37, Reply)

Fo shizzle ma nizzle.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:39, Reply)

You don't even know what you're saying.

( thealternativefact, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:41, Reply)

I so do.
It's er, "What ho, I agree old bean."
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

That sounds more like you.

( thealternativefact, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:46, Reply)

Top hole!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:48, Reply)

Transformers 2:
Not only is it rubbish, it's also incredibly long.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Alright DiT?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:37, Reply)

Alright, Boss Keloid?

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Not bad thanks
Got wine and shouting at politicians on tele. On phone to the maternal unit. She thinks I'm listening.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Tell her hi from me.
The bruising usually goes down in 2-3 weeks.

I think Nick Clegg is acquitting himself very well.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:43, Reply)

She ain't complaining
He is actually. But once he's off screen for two seconds I forget what he looks like.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:55, Reply)

You are Megatron AICMFP

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:37, Reply)

Fuck off, I am PRIME.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

So long as you're not the LOLWAKI robot who was in the 2nd one
who voiced him?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:40, Reply)

I dunno, some cunt probably.
EDIT: His name is Tom Kenny.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:41, Reply)

BUT WHAT WAS HIS NAME?
Must know
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

You mean the twins?
Wheelie and Skids.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:42, Reply)

No, the cunt in the desert

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:43, Reply)

Jesus

( thealternativefact, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Hahahahahahha
Oh wait, he's not in the cast list. An oversight perhaps?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

Jesus is everywhere, Becky.
EVERYWHERE.
( thealternativefact, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:46, Reply)

*Especially* in a Michael Bay film.
*Jesus throws a grenade*

"Things are about to get Holy."

He lights a cigarette and walks away with a huge explosion in the background. He doesn't look back.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:47, Reply)

That was Jetfire.
Voiced by Mark Ryan.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:45, Reply)

Hmm...I thought he was someone else. Thanks BFF

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:46, Reply)

and apparantly
Noel Fielding's Girlfriend AICMFP
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:38, Reply)

FUCKING NOEL FIELDING CUNT.
Unfunny, boss eyed, shitty cunt.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:39, Reply)

It's okay
I didn't say you were Noel Fielding. Just his girlfriend
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:40, Reply)

Hey! Damn youse, I have *some* taste, you know.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:43, Reply)

He knows.
He just likes being dramatic.
( thealternativefact, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:43, Reply)

O ALAS AND ALACK!
HOWL YE WINDS! BARK YE DOGS! RUN AROUND AND FALL OVER A BIT IN YOUR NIGHTIES, FAIR MAIDENS!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:46, Reply)

He just likes being dramaticholding his cock and balls between his legs to look like a chick
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:47, Reply)

I like this

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:47, Reply)

"Look at me, I'm a LADY!"

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:48, Reply)

+boy

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 21:48, Reply)

"+boy"? Is that a euphemism for a strap-on?
And is it a PRETTY strap-on?
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 6:48, Reply)

question re: disguise...
How could we tell on here? After all, if you're a bot, why bother getting-up into all that gear, when you can kick back in yer robot drawers/pipe-cleaner thong, no bra, and let 'er all hang out, and no one's the wiser!
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 6:54, Reply)

I have 20 tattoos, only 1/3 of which are available to the casual observer...
And threeeeee bad impulse purchases that need covering-up COME-FUCKING-PLETELY.

My favorites are my first, my biggest, and my last.

And I'm 5 years behind on the memorial ankle tat (to go with the memorial ankle tats --- well, properly, CANKLE tats... *sigh* for my late Nannie & Papa, maternal grandparents) for my late nephew, because I'm ALWAYS FUCKING BROKE.

Yeah, I know, we're ALL always fucking broke, but I'm also being evicted for the first time in my bloody-clusterfucked fucking life, so top THAT, smartasses.

And yes, other than the 3 fucktardia pieces of scratcher SHITE, I'm damned proud of the rest, especially the ones that hurt badly enough to justify my punching the motherfuckers in the throat. My Judy Parker mermaid is the sexiest tattoo I've ever seen, so there. And I've seen one HELLUVA lot of tattoos. And no, not whilst doing the entire 14th Fleet or the entire Marine Corps, thank yew.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 6:47, Reply)

enough to HAVE justified punching the motherfuckers in the throat...
But since they were holding a rapidly-vibrating 5-sharpy-pointy-needle pack inserted into the top 2 layers of my skin, somehow, for some unknown reason, I did restrain myself from a cold-cock punch that would undoubtedly have been extremely satisfying.
(AnntichristSCoulter, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 8:26, Reply)

She-Chavs give me the 'orn

(The Boy Monders I have ginger bits in my beard., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 9:47, Reply)