in a closet on the 23rd floor of the shittiest hotel in new york.
5 boys. we were promised 5 beds.
what awaited us on the 23rd floor were two twin-size beds, a broken bathroom, and a very spacious closet. in a stroke of momentary but unwitting genius i decided to sleep in the closet rather than the beds. little did i or anyone else know until later, the 23rd floor was reserved for one-hour rooms. also by sleeping on a pile of my clothes in the closet rather than in the main room i avoided the risk of coming in contact with the several dozen rats that also lived on our floor. i locked the door to the closet (which worked), lit some incense and smoked a j. meanwhile the door to the hotel room did not lock, and 4 people i knew were huddled up to eachother trying to be warm and to fall asleep next to the uncloseable window (which allowed all the noise from the street to come in.) opened up the drawer of the bedside table in the room the next morning to find someone had carved with a pocketknife, the words "I just had sex in your bed." one person got headlice.

this is the strangest place i made a conscious desicion to sleep.
(USER No: 21515...FUCK YOU TO FUCK YOU FU see profile for limited time offer., Sat 30 Dec 2006, 16:37, Reply)

Band tales
Got drunk with some mates on a tour bus in Wolverhampton. Woke up to have a piss only to find I was in York.

Did a gig in Turin Italy. After much partying went back to the hotel and grabbed a crate of beers we stole from the rider earlier. We sat in a feild with a full moon and nice view of the mountains. After way too many beers we went back to the hotel only to find it closed and no door bell reception open or anything so we stole the bedsheets from the hotel washing line and slept in the feild. Woke up freezing, tried to get into the hotel again, gave up, found a large man hole where the heating generator was for the hotel and slept on the concrete floor with the rats and stinking of deisel, but at least it was warm ;)
( sPUNKer do your pictures for nothing get abuse for free, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 16:31, Reply)

Disorientated
When I was in Uni I used to get smashed in Paisley and then take "sleep breaks" on garden walls during the shitty 3 mile walk home. I would regularly awake hrs later completely disoriented and ended up heading back in the same direction I had just came from. That used to piss me off every time.
(grazer is sick of looking at houses, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:43, Reply)

In no particular order (since none are that exciting):

behind a church, after breaking into my boyfriend's mate's house across the street to get a sleeping bag.
bathroom floors (more passed-out than sleeping).
desk at various jobs.
standing in front of a class full of students (maybe only 10 seconds, but still ...).
on the floor of a classroom, in front of 6 bemused 4-year-old students (possibly a couple of minutes).
shower (quite frequently).
in the car ... whilst driving.
crowded Tokyo subway trains.
grotty Chinese country trains.
grotty Chinese buses.
grotty Chinese restaurants.
slightly less grotty Chinese massage parlour.
in a car outside some fairly dodgy welfare flats in Melbourne.
on the hearth of a particularly roaring fire - close enough to be singed, drunk enough not to notice.
in pools of my own vomit in various backyards.
toilets at uni.
showers at uni.
inflatable paddling pool, in some stranger's backyard.
plastic chairs at Narita airport (until I fell off due to a small earthquake).
on top of Hanging Rock (maybe only Aussies would know this one).
inside the cab of a (disused) steam train.
odd restaurant in Kuala Lumpur.
smoking area in Hong Kong airport.
(Celerydemon, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:40, Reply)

There were three of us.
Lying under an over-turned inflatable dinghy. On a trampoline. In somebody else's garden.

I'm not sure whether the other two I was with had any idea whose garden we were in, but I know I certainly didn't.
( Fluffy elephants, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:39, Reply)

hookersville
north of italy this time, another random train journey took us somewhere in coastal piedmont, and, as luck would have it, very very fucking far away from anything that resembled a camp site or hostel (that would charge less than six pounds per night... yes, we were that cheap). anyway, a universal decision to sleep on the beach is taken, and immediately regretted. apart from the fact that this was the rockiest beach this side of anywhere, we were all habitually inspected by strange little bearded men. about three hours and twelve little bearded men later, one of our party sits up to ask 'what the fuck?'. we look left and right, and lo and behold, every twenty yards is a couple getting down to it. it's then that we notice that this particular stretch of the beach happens to be the town's effective red light district, and we had in fact been advertising our wares to every pervert in town (one of whom followed us all the way to the train station when we made our hasty exit).
( the brass moustache putting the ass moust in brache since, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:26, Reply)

Tutu
Woke up wearing a white Tutu (ballet skirt thing) and Doc Martins.

Aged about 14

Went camping on the Quantock hills for my 16th.
woke up on the back seat of a car, face down in a pile of potatos.
we got pissed and thought pots in their jackets would taste nice, so raided a farmers field in the middle of the night.
(BigAndyBee, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:24, Reply)

nazi town
was backpacking with a few chums around europe back in day, and we got in the habit of simply jumping on whatever train looked nice, and getting off at random stations. anyway, rome was a bit crowded one day, so we decided to jump on the first train headed south for the night. after a couple of hours, its getting pretty dark, so we decided to jump off at the next station and find a place to camp in what must have been somewhere just north of naples. as the evening's only train pulls away behind us, we're greeted with swastikas graffitied on every wall, and italian slogans like 'NATO go home, we'll kill the kosovans ourselves'. unperturbed by this due to extreme fatigue, we pull up our backpacks, and fall asleep on the sea wall of the fishing port the town was built around, only to be woken about three hours later by some irate fisherman. visual inspection of the town the next morning took us round to the local market, where mussolini wine was on sale next to jewish passports from the 1930's, and official nazi pin badges from the war. scary, scary place.

come to think of it, there's tons of stories about sleeping in weird places just from this one holiday. might post some more...
( the brass moustache putting the ass moust in brache since, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:19, Reply)

Fife

( Iki I think my camel is dead., Sat 30 Dec 2006, 15:05, Reply)

after a party..
We were 16, very drunk, had smoked a ton of weed and had a 15 km bikeride home. and it was cold... -5C or so. screw that! we broke open a shipping container for recycled paper, and slept in the old papers.. nice and warm, but not all that soft.
(radja, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 14:49, Reply)

My friend's house in Birmingham, two miles from my house
Which was decidedly odd, because we had started the drinking session at his uncle's house. In Devon.
( Dave the Mighty, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 14:23, Reply)

Bottom Bunk
After working overtime till 8pm one winter evening, I persuaded a colleague that we’d earned a drink in the pub over the road. The truth was I wanted to get this guy pissed for a laugh, as he was usually a bit of a hermit and found the idea quite entertaining. It was quiet in the pub, so we played pool, which soon became a serious battle of wits. The Stella flowed and we were both feeling the effects pretty quickly as neither of us had eaten since lunchtime. At one point I sat down between two stools and landed on my back, much to the amusement of my opponent and the odd punter stood at the bar. After about five or six pints we were both feeling ill and decided it would be best to leave. My car was parked close by and foolishly decided it would be good idea to drop this guy off on my way home, as it was a freezing night. Fortunately the weather had taken its toll on my battery and the car wouldn’t start. Not to be dissuaded I asked my new pal to give us a push to bump-start the car along the side-street. On reaching the end of the street and failing miserably, he jumped in the driver’s seat and I gave one almighty push and onto the main road the car trundled. Still to no avail he steered the car down the hill as I ran diagonally across the road, losing my grip on the back of the car. Not looking where I was heading, I tripped and launched myself headlong into a builders skip. My landing was softened by a mass of cardboard, which I soon found very comfortable and fell fast asleep. It was a bitter cold night and I awoke about 3am shivering, beneath a covering of light snow. I stumbled out, quite bemused and managed to flag down a taxi and finally headed home.

I was alerted by the phone ringing the following morning. It was my brother, enquiring as to how my car had ended up parked askew in a bus-lane some ten miles from home? It was then the smell of dog shit hit me, which I discovered was smeared about my face when I looked in the mirror…
(minky, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 14:10, Reply)

Wales.

(amazingmikeyc internet ninja, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 13:56, Reply)

Ha!
Same ex managed to sleep next to our 10k soundsystem at anti sonar last year, while all hell was breaking loose everywhere. She also slept in the hallway to let me in once after a party cos I'd lost my keys. turned out I hadnt, so I staggered in, stepped over her and went straight to bed.
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 13:29, Reply)

Not me but..
The ex thank God. Nervous about coming out with my lot for the first time she proceeds to get wrecked. I wave her off in a taxi a few hours later and go back in to party. I arrive back at the student digs with a fellow housemate and go upstairs to bed. As I walk to the bathroom I see my brand new girlfriend asleep on the loo. Knickers round her ankles. Door wide open. Shit on the floor and splashed up her legs. Yes readers, she needed a shit and a vomit at the same time and instead of chucking in the bath and shitting in the toilet as most people would do, she gets up, turns round, and throws up down the bog while covering her ankles and the floor in runny alcohol soaked poo. I took her to bed and slept top and tail with Chaz.
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 13:26, Reply)

In a helicopter, on Air Cadets camp
A puma, specifically.

There's nothing like waking up at a 70 degree slant with a field of corn streaking past the window about 20ft away.

What? I was tired.
( TechImp is trying to be nice (with great difficulty)., Sat 30 Dec 2006, 13:18, Reply)

...
17 years old. A squat in Dalston. In my boxers, using my coat as a blanket, a copy of the East London Yellow Pages as my pillow. Holding hands with a Zimbabwean man, with several forged chequebooks around us.
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 12:36, Reply)

How to freak out your friends...
I am a scuba diver, and have been diving in many strange and wonderful places. I used to help out with the new students of the local dive school.

I'm a real water baby, I'm exceptionally comfortable being in the water, and have fallen asleep before at the bottom of a swimming pool before.

It really freaks out the students when you close your eyes and stop responding. I had to be shaken awake. Most of the students looked pale and scared. I was happy though!
(The Oncoming Storm, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 12:19, Reply)

Time to make a list
1) In a puddle on a balcony in the block of flats next to my own...I don't have a key to that block nor do I know how I got there.

2) On a rather comfy leather sofa in my local with my girlfriend at the time. We were awoken and kicked out after they'd finished cleaning up and were about to lock up and go home.

3) Wedged between my friends desk and his bed at his house party. I was sleeping as though I were trying to touch my toes except my feet were in the air...

This was after drinking the best part of a litre of vodka on the way to the party, the rest of which was polished off on arival at said party. I then proceeded to make out with a minger in a bush before getting carried to sleep in the host's bed after passing out on the lawn (not before destroying all his garden furniture). Later that night I was conscious and making out with previous minger in the host's bed before being rudely interrupted by her boyfriend who'd been there all night. Unfortunately I was too pissed to just get up and leave so I kinda fell into the previously described gap. I was also too pissed to get out of the gap and escape the torment that was listening to the pair have sex less than a foot away from my head!

4) I slept with somebody on a park bench, if that doesn't count then I can't remember anymore strange places I've slept...
( Captain V, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 11:36, Reply)

legal pills
I had a splitting headache at college. Went to see the nurse who gave me this horse pill of a tablet. Now pills have never made me feel drowsy, but this one was different. I went into a lecture room and promptly fell asleep. Woke up in the middle of some language class about 3 hours later. They just carried on around me all the while. I think there might have been even more than one class i slept through.

I have always wondered what these pills were. Maybe they were from her own stash?! I wonder also what would happen if i had been drinking too....

Length? I said DROWSY, not DROOPY!
(i AM that masked man Book him Tonto, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 11:32, Reply)

One foot in the grave, one foot on the pedal...
...I fell asleep in Rebels, Sheffield towns late 80's/early 90's wannabe L.A-stylee rock night club. (It was a dump but it was OUR dump!) Being woken up while Judas Priests 'Turbo Lover' was blaring out was a little....odd.

And right now? I'm sleeping on the settee. Sat up. A week before Christmas I managed a tumble down the stairs. My ribs HURT. A lot.
(TC, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 11:10, Reply)

The Places I Remember
.
I may expand on these later if i can be arsed.


Inside a tank. A big one that goes bang.

In a barn in the Brenner Pass, Austria after a thunderstorm flattened our tent.

In a graveyard after pitching tent in the dark.

In a bed covered in glass during the London Hurricane. The bloody windows had blown in and I slept through the whole thing. Alcohol may have been involved.

Under many tables in many nightclubs.

Under my desk at telecom company. That happened so often that I kept a sleeping bag there.

On my desk at too many companies to mention.

In a hotel (HAH!) room for assylum seekers in Croydon with a chair jammed under the door handle and a chair leg in my hand.

On the fucking train to London waaaay too many times.

On the fucking train from London as I snored my way past my stop and ended up in Jockland - again, too many times.

Under the boardwalk at the Cannes film festival circa 1983.

Heathrow, Gatwick, Lagos, Newcastle, Belfast (both of them ), Los Angeles airports.

But the worst place I slept was in a bed with a fat pig. I had to. I was married to her.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 11:10, Reply)

my own back garden
I was about 17 and had been out all night, getting home about 5.30am. My mum had locked me out so I ended up sleeping in the back garden. She nearly died of fright when she saw me through the kitchen window. She was pissed off, I was pissed off, and I had an exam that morning. I failed it.

I've also slept (and had sex in while pregnant) my in-laws' bed. That was too weird.
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 10:47, Reply)

sorry christine!
Xmas eve last year. Spending it with the ex's family, the whole caboodle are there and so, it's the perfect opportunity to endear myself with the possible relations. Get drunk with ex down pub with her schoolfriends, very drunk. Come home and collapse. Wake up, go to the toilet, come back, and get into bed. Only to hear 'Hound is that you? I think you best go next door dont you?'

It was my ex's Grandmother.

I'd still do her though.
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 10:15, Reply)

G n Fkn R
14, guns and roses gig. loads of cider on the coach on the way there and the way back. with jack daniels swigged from the bottle. the taste made my lips burn, so i didn't actually swallow any, but still...
get back to grimsby, pissed, at about 2am. no buses, no taxis, very long walk back to my house. decide to have a little lie down. this is winter, by the way. get woken up, by quite nice lady, with dog, on the lawn of a biggish house. Very cold. My hair was frozen to the ground. and the sick in my hair was frozen too...
(jameslib, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 10:03, Reply)

I woke like it, so must of slept like it...
The worst place I have slept is under a kitchen table, with a chair leg on my head. If someone had sat down....
(cactusrob, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 10:00, Reply)

Never EVER go......
Drinking out in Edgware. Got slaughtered with work colleagues. Ended up at someones house, someone gets a bit arsey with me, I get arsey back, they swing and catch me a beaut on the jaw. I get bundled outside, handed my half bottle of vodka and get told to go and get bent. Which I promptly was, what with being somewhere in North west London (I lived in Stoke Newington at the time, which aint that near for all you non Londonites), drunk as a skunk with no idea where I was, how to get home and a mere pound for currency.

Which is how I then find myself sleeping under some bushes until 2 tramps woke me up with their fighting. I don't remember moving but I must have done cos next thing it's the morning, and I'm in someones garden on their sun lounger cradling my vodka with two children staring out of their window.

So if you were one of the kids who was staring out of that window.....what you doin on B3ta? I know where you live....
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 9:58, Reply)

I've never been good in the dark
or in spooky places (unless accompanied). I'm the one who can always manage the 'there's something looking over my shoulder' feeling in an empty room. When I was about twelve, Mum took my brother and I to see two days of a big event, and told us we'd be camping at the friend of a friend's place. Great! Camping! Fun! We packed the car and headed off to sunny gloucester. In the car, somebody who was with us let slip some comment about 'on old church' and was immediatly hushed by Mum. Odd. When we arrived, I discovered that these friends of friend's lived in a converted church and that their garden was in fact a dis-used cemetry, complete with 'former headstone' patio (the stones still stood around the back! Great. Let's find the kid most scared of this shit and make him camp over dead people....
( The Togaboy The world will end on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 9:31, Reply)

A Bed
Yeah, I know. Lame.

But it was a Plöpp bed in IKEA, while I was trialling when other bed was looking at wardrobes or something. I can recommend it. (The quality of the bed, not the ferocity of the argument after being wakened.)
( Tepid_Halibut felt like a cold, empty shell of a human...until, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 9:11, Reply)

Can't remember...
Way too many to mention them all (police cell, field, on a boat, with various friends and their family etc), but in response to the original question, I wake up on Pompey beaches too often, and the fog just makes it more surreal.
(Acidsplash, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 8:45, Reply)