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Moving on from my question the other day about who was most likely to commit suicide live on /talk
Who is most likely to end up a deranged stalker such as this?

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8040178.stm
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
my sincerest apologies russell

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
BBC LINK

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
I could link the story from another news site if it'd stop you vomiting up and twitching
Look, you've ruined your thundercats tshirt:(
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
I realised something about you last night

Did you used to be the Milky Bar kid when younger then you went a bit head wrong? I think you did used to be the Milky Bar Kid and then flipped out when hitting puberty. And when I say 'hitting puberty' I mean hitting on 12 year olds.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
No.

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
:'(
why do you always shoot me down in flames?
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:13, archived)
Because you're too stylish to be shot down in any other way

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:15, archived)
flames on the sexual catwalk beeatches

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
what a crap sequel to the fantastic four that was.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
I was Dr Broom.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
Why yes it is, who's a clever boy? yes, _you're_ a clever boy !
*belly rasberys*
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:14, archived)
GET OFF

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
TY&GN

(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
Piston?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
In lieu of this, I'd like to retract my previous statement

(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
Poor Piston:(

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
A couple hours after his debut stand-up performance?

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 11 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
I'm really looking forward to meeting him.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
Thing is, I mock Piston the way I mock everyone on here
I quite like him. In a way.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
Do you mock me?
Because if you don't *shakes fist*
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
Lots of people are fucking nasty to me, and I'm a nice person
I'm hoping he is that way round also.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
To be fair, I haven't seen anyone be nasty to you on here.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:13, archived)
You've missed it then
I haven't been active on here that long and I've seen some of the shit she gets.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:14, archived)
Like?

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:15, archived)
Drop it.
my point was, I hope he just gets ribbed a lot and he's nice, and not deserving, but I won't know that till I see for myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
It's your own fault, I mean it's just a 127min film
and sam neil is pretty cool
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:19, archived)
And what a soundtrack

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:20, archived)
I'm going to poo on a copy and send it to you.
Not a nice poo, either.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:20, archived)
he actually makes bashes
if only for the `fucking hell` factor.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:08, archived)
He's harmless. But doesn't know how to just chillout and not hit on every underage girl or be aggressive to every other guy.
He'd be fine if he just learnt to be cool, be himself and chill.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
He's not a bad chap, just a little bit socially retarded.
I can emphasise with that.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
your not retarded
just a shorter version of magnum pi.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
Gonz is an online retard sometimes (which makes him epic) but in reallife he's a diamond.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:19, archived)
I'm looking forward to meeting Gonz, he's a really lovely chap on here.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:20, archived)
He's top banana :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
I only chatted to him very briefly, but he seems like a nice bloke.
You, on the other hand...
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
I never touched your other hand!

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
Gonz is one of the best b3tans
I would put my winky in him if he were more ladylike
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
I'm going to cuddle his lovely head.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
It's all jewy and smells of sultanas

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
Jewy heads are the best.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:30, archived)
I have met Gonz on a couple of occasions
He's a lovely chap.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:30, archived)
Reply to this and all the above.
Aww, chucks, *blushes*
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:44, archived)
I would love to see his stand up routine
as the last comedian to die as badly as that whilst on stage would be Tommy Cooper.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:08, archived)
Do you ever wonder if people are as nice about you when you're not around?

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
nah
I have a life.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
Must be nice :(

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
overrated really
always end up wanting to live someone elses.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
You can live mine if you want
lots of bacon sandwiches and star trek.

Yes it IS awesome. Shut up.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:19, archived)
more star trek
/looks at video/dvd collection
/looks at star trek books on wall
/looks at signed poster of Garak from ds9 on wall

tis a living hell.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
I have lots of star trek
Maybe I should introduce some bacon sandwiches but I'm not sure about the appropriate bacon sandwich:star trek mixing ratios and I don't want to cause a reactor breach.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
Just stick a cornish pasty to your head.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
Will it get me teh ladiez?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:29, archived)
well, they are internally ladies
but externally...fucking awful.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:31, archived)
Excuse me.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:36, archived)
all the ones I have met
had have `issues`
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:38, archived)
90nZ0

(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
Cr3 gazes me all the new female sign up every week so I can ask them if they enjoy hollyoaks.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
that should be part of the registery process
Name: _______
Username: _______
Email: _______
Subscribe To Newsletter? Yes [ ] No [ ]
Sex? Male [ ] Female [ ]
Do you like Hollyoaks? Yes [ ] No [ ]
Pander pander pander? "Go away you bloody pervert!" [ ] "Oh how sweet! Here's a picture of my tits!" [ ]
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)

hollyoaks

it up the arse
bukkake
themselves
sleeping with their pets

etc etc
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
I can think of at least one person with more than a passing interest in the relationship of two people on here
But it would be remiss of me to say anything at all about the creepy cunt.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
I thought that was our little secret >:(

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
FFS
Shush will you!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
uugggggghhhhhhhh

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
But supermatt and gonz have split up:(

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
A terrible tragedy

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:08, archived)
I don't see how any of us could be stalkers
We're all just so lovely. And functional in modern society.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
I'm great, me.
Ask anyone.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
I did
The answers came in - 98 say you're great, 1 spoiled ballot, 1 voted for 'calm down, intertubby'
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
Typical autistics ruining a good day.

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
You're a fucking foodwrong, is what you are.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
Fuck right off

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:29, archived)

Det Ch Insp Tony Heydon from Nottinghamshire Police warned people about the unknown dangers of the internet.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
Sounds like something a Cenobite would say

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:06, archived)
One wonders if he's seen /talk.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
He looked briefly and then had to go and sit in the dark and have a cry for a while

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
+ a wank

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 11 May 2009, 14:21, archived)
"look out for the things we don't know about"

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
I thought he was a Detective Chimp for a minute there.
That would be awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
~i'M not sure, amybe someone shoul dpost thier address and seee

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
I'm in the phone book.
You're nearly all welcome.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:14, archived)
my overnight rapecase is already packed

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
WOOHOO!
You know it's not rape if I say yes?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
Gaffer tape = no chance to

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 11 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Pro tip!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:30, archived)
This couple
Do you reckon it was some sort of sex website that they ran ? The nutter was looking at flapshots of the girl and getting all hot under the collar ?
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:10, archived)
It was for a Nintendo DS game...
Probably closing his cock in the console.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
I would say, but I don't want to get all stabbed up like.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
I blame the girl.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:11, archived)
By being female, the slut had it coming

(I helped save b3ta! Gooch Is neither here nor there, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
'course.
All girls that won't fuck me are frigid, all girls that won't fuck me again are whores.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:21, archived)
She probably wears bras
and knickers.

And takes baths, fully naked.

Filthy whore.
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Any woman that has kids or is pregnant is a filthy minx who is begging for it if you ask me
I mean, they've definitely done sex at least once.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
me.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:15, archived)
*sends you explicit gaz*
*leads you on*
*teases you*
*is genuinely suprised to find you living in my bin, wanking into a discarded pringles tin containing a small clump of my hair*
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:20, archived)
I don't really understand why the judge considers the motive "bizarre".
Men have been killing other men out of woman jealousy pretty much forever.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
It's because they met on the Internet
and the Judge grew up in the 1940's.
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
yeah, like Adam and Noah.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 11 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
Adam killed Noah ?
Should think so, animal pestering cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:24, archived)
I liked their soft toy movie piss takes

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Mon 11 May 2009, 14:25, archived)