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# they were creatures of few words...


(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:41, archived)
# is that like
a really badly played game of "Malletts Mallett"?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# ..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:37, archived)
#
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:38, archived)
# beautiful
simply beautiful.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# Excellent
Sheer Class
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# marvellous.
I feel a mini-challenge series is in the offing.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:44, archived)
# AGH!
Those suicide bombers are losing their touch...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:45, archived)
# hehehehehe. lumpbucket you surely are god.
in a nutshell.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:52, archived)
# A small
god, then. Or a nutshell-shaped one anyways.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:53, archived)
# Who did this picture?


Anyone know who did this bit of brilliant potatoshopping? It was posted on here about 4-5 months ago, but I can't find it.
Hats off to whoever did it, though. I've been using it as my desktop wallpaper ever since.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# gilbert!
he was great
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# whahey!
I like that a lot. Never seen it before..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:37, archived)
# Oo
If you ever get bored, you should spend an afternoon trawling through the old archives. Any newer B3tans who never saw the Disaster Quo series, for example, just haven't lived.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:42, archived)
# They should
visit disasterquo then, and aaarrggh...Wasps! b3ta toy site and and and....
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:45, archived)
# Green Gilbert
Is the name of the alien, I've got a quality pic but can't host it at the minute. Can't remember where i got it from either!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:45, archived)
# From Get Fresh?
Or am I way off the mark?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:47, archived)
# spot.
on.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:53, archived)
# ..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# Hehe
.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:35, archived)
# today
I just can't fucking hummus, don't you hate that?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:33, archived)
# Caught the little bugger
and he tried telling me it was the cat. NSFW?

20m
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:30, archived)
# too small
to be nsfw i think
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# It looks like
a sausage from where I'm sitting. Maybe I'm too far away.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:32, archived)
# You
must eat some very strange sausages then
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:35, archived)
# Haven't you been
to the butchers on Shields Road?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:38, archived)
# yep
they do a roaring trade in bondage sausages
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# Bondage beef
too. Which for some reason has replace Dr. Phil's Dwayne Dibbley-teeth-stylee BJ pic with one of Bondi Beach.

Must get my brain serviced.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:46, archived)
# cool
he visits the same newsgroups as me : )
i hope he posts that one up for us
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:54, archived)
# Thats
alright then
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:33, archived)
# they thought
I was mad, entering my new 4x4 racing marmot in the desert rally, until he shot into the lead that is...

speedy marmot
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:29, archived)
# I love the
look on 'is little face!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:30, archived)
# marmot
Where does the driver sit?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:32, archived)
# its
remote control.

[edit] My first front page, wahey!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:38, archived)
# For me as i'm a n00b
Woo Yay, ?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:28, archived)
# sure why not:
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:29, archived)
# Ok, cos he did i will
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# Woo Yay
Wassit mean ?

Or just a general expression of happiness, like a w00t!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:32, archived)
# Yes
Spot on.
Have a free banananana.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:35, archived)
# indeed
it does
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# You should have said..
"HOWDY DOODLY DOO! Anybody like any toast?"
in an american salesman voice.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# Talkie Toaster
heh heh.
I must have seen that one about a million times!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:32, archived)
# I love Talky
Toaster. Didn't the bloke who played Kryten in the first series end up as the voice for Talky Toaster?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# dont know
have'nt heard that before...

"given that life is infinate, and the universe is also infinate. my question is this... would you like some toast?"
tee hee, great!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# He did
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# Red Dwarf
The oldest series are the best.. Talkie Toaster has been my nick since '93 but now I just use Toaster..

Care for a muffin?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:37, archived)
# Mfffffffff!
I can't remember Lister's response to that...dammit....didn't it meantion bread-based derivatives or summat?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# *falls off chair with laughter*
"oh no! help! i can't remember the entire scripts to all eps of Red Dwarf ever made! will anyone ever speak to me again?"
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# Was
that the teensiest weensiet smidgeon of sarcasm I detect there Little Miss Kitten?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:46, archived)
# Hehehe,
I'm even having to refresh the Blackadder cache :)
S'not summat I do intentionally, it's part of whatever mild OCD [1] I'm suffering from.

[1] Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Use this information wisely
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:49, archived)
# and definitely
no smeggin' flapjacks
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:50, archived)
# *sigh*
I miss the good old days of Red Dwarf.

*sigh*
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:33, archived)
# Yes,
when it used to be funny...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:37, archived)
# before
that chick joined
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:41, archived)
# Replacing Clare Grogan was a bad move,
in my book. It all got a bit silly after the time-drive cliff hanger...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:44, archived)
# fair do's
that's quite some time ago now.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:42, archived)
# It seems
that the better the sfx got, the unfunnier it became.

Wait, are you trying to tell me that everbody's dead?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:42, archived)
# apparently
they are making a film.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:45, archived)
# afternoon!
Just got into work - had the morning off to wait for my new phone to be delivered, i've got it now yay!
[edit: sorry for sounding a show off but im dead chuffed!!!]
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:28, archived)
# the weebl
t-shirts what do the prices translate as into english pounds???
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:21, archived)
# Cameltosis!
Hahahahahahaahahaha! great name :)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# thank you
but anyways......
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:29, archived)
# You sir?
have you ever google'd?

No?

Why not..

failing that:
clicky
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# thank
but
20.99 USD
United States Dollars = 13.7478 GBP
United Kingdom Pounds

doesnt sound right lol
but thanks i get it now
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# Divide the cost
in $ by roughly 1.6 (or whatever the current exchange rate is)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# Natural spong......
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:20, archived)
# Ha ha ha.
'And then, they gave me THIS!'
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# .....which was nice.




/coat
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:25, archived)
# testing testing
1...2

1...2

2...3
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:18, archived)
# Receiving Message
Loud and clear

Over
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:20, archived)
# you forgot to say...
*ckshh*
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:22, archived)
# aha!
lound and clear big fella
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:21, archived)
# can you hear me at the back?
aha - a Les Dawson fan I see.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:21, archived)
# Nickers Knackers Knockers
RIP big Les - editing works as well!!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# altogether now.... Hang the PJ, Hang the PJ, Hang the PJ...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:17, archived)
# I like the Smiths, but I don't know whose face that is.
Maybe I'd best laugh and pretend that I do.
AaaaHAHAHAHAhaaaa!
There, now I don't look stupid...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:18, archived)
# Big Brother
person, who got a BJ from Jade the Pig.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:20, archived)
# nooo
i like PJ, he told Jade she was a 'seven-pinter'.
He must mean 7 pints of special brew tho
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:19, archived)
# seven pints of
absinthe more like..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# or formaldehyde,
ideally.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# riots on the street of London
riots on the streets of Birmingham

....
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:19, archived)
# I think you'll find
it's 'panic'
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:22, archived)
# alright
I'm a twat !
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:25, archived)
# Though I suppose riots could result from panic
therefore you're taking the song to it's logical conclusion, which may or may not also involve the hanging of DJs :)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:29, archived)
# no
riots on the BEACHES of Birmingham
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# Panic?
:)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# Don't mind if I do. Thanks.
Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggghhhhhh. What do we do ?
Where shall we go ?

/coat
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:37, archived)
# bubblewrap is the good
i wanna suit made out of bubble wrap with the bubbly ends inwards and then i wanna roll around on the floor listening to them all pop and then i will laugh
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:16, archived)
# I saw a greebo
with a bubble wrap coat on the other day.

He looked like a twat. Mind you, that could have had something to do with the fact he was a greebo.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:17, archived)
# What
is a Greebo?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:22, archived)
# grebo
A bit like a crusty biker, not many Gaye Bikers fans around anymore though
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:25, archived)
# As far as me and everyone from home is concerned,
a greebo is somebody who desperately, desperately tries to be different from everybody else (due to the fact they are ugly/smelly/intolerable arseholes- delete as applicable) but fail to be different as they just follow an 'alternative' image which is already popular.

Hmmm, that wasn't clear at all. A good example of a greebo is someone who tries to be a goth. They might get the attire right, but they are still gobby annoying twats and therefore fail miserably to capture the goth image and get laughed at a lot.(anyone who knows a true goth will know they are generally pretty quiet)

Oh yeah, like I say, they try to be unique, yet you see pubs full of them, all huddled together. Very unique(!)

Rant over....


/coat

EDIT* I'll point out now, it wasn't the bubble wrap jacket that made him a greebo.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:30, archived)
# my personal hate
is people who call themselves "alternative".

Case study: I have a friend who describes a bunch of mates she has as "alternative types", which must be crazy shit - surely every person has to look completely different to each other and the rest of the world?
...Oh no, right, they all dress exactly the same. Oops me.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# Yeah, they sound like greebos to me.
"We're so different, we're great!......Yet we are all identical to each other"

Tossers

It isn't the image that bothers me. It's the fact that they think they are superior because they think they are being individual when they are blatantly not! Insufferable arse-monkeys!

Ah look, you've got me started again now! Excuse me whilst I count to 10 slowly.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# 'them'
yeah - ive met people like them, - i remember a group of 'individuals' who thought it was strange that i was dressed wierd in puma tracksuit and Kangol (it was my 80's breakin faze) - They didnt seem to notice that as individuals they all looked identical - but they were goth/punk.. not greebos
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:49, archived)
# grebo
It was an 80's thing with bands like Crazyhead, Pop Will Eat Itself and Gaye Bikers and yes it was greasy and smelly as for goths I am thinking of an anti goth post now
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# ?
a greebo is a goth? that dont make sense - why would a greebo wear bubblewrap - its not black? and it has bubbles? surely too bubbly for a wannagoth. I thought grebos are street bums with nothing btter to wear than bubblewrap from discarded boxes - then again , what could be btter than bubblewrap - thats the kind of greebo i aspire to be - bubbleclad peacekeeper of the streets (with meths)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# By Greebo...
do you mean greasy man of rock?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# a greeba eh!
when i become a greebo i too shall have my own coat of bubblewrap - as it is written so it shall be done..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:24, archived)
# weird.
Vixta said that, the other day after seeing that ad for allergies on TV!!
woo for great minds!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:20, archived)
# yes
it is the future my friend - bubblwrap-wear
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:25, archived)
# i think bubblewrap underpants
would feel lovely
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:28, archived)
# wow!
bubblewrap brassieres! Double the fun for both of you!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:35, archived)
# nice
bubblewrap clothing for couples so they can roll around and hear the popping and laugh - oh the fun - wheres the bubblewrap clothing store?!!!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:44, archived)
# Scary
But True

(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:15, archived)
# I once had some
pornography in which one of the women looked like Dwayne Dibley. I really should have kept it, but I'm not into that sort of thing *ahem*
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:25, archived)
# tricky for blowjobs.
I should imagine.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:30, archived)
# Ta muchly
for the mental image that's now lodged in my head :)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:36, archived)
# oh, well, you know,
i aim to please. :)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:40, archived)
# I aim to
not stain my pants.

re:post yesterday about Maps of Africa
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# that's very rude
from the normally very refined Dr P.

Is it your tight trousers getting to you ?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# Dr. Phil!!!
Are you possessed by the spirit of Mike, today?
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:42, archived)
# I can be naughty!
It's not just Lula and TL-unicorn who can be suggestive minxes on this board, you know. ;)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:47, archived)
# This is quite odd.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:14, archived)
# Fantastic.
I love the 'Here, see my flaming cucumber' picture.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:19, archived)
# was it a cucumber?
she looks fascinated anyway, while he looks kinda scary.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# that
is a bit mad innit.

but it's got the Benny Hill theme tune as a midi, so it's not all bad..
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:24, archived)
# That makes up for the madness.
i think i'll nab that tune for my site.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:31, archived)
# anyone know a good programme for
converting WAV files to high quality mp3's? i got a 6 and a half minute track that needs compressing, but it only comes out as 2.5 MB when i do it on the cd writer i got now! weird...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:13, archived)
# yes
have a look around at www.sharewaremusicmachine.com
you will find something
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:18, archived)
# AudioCatalyst is good
You should be able to get a free trial from their site..
I think

[edit] fixed linky
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:18, archived)
# Sound forge (5.0)
is good. Perhaps a bit of overkill for what you are after doing, mind. Plus you have to somehow 'acquire' the program first...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# ta muchly
everybody :)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:24, archived)
# musicmatch
from musicmatch.com - the free version does that nicely.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:27, archived)
# Woo, yay, and if
you'll allow me, houpla to being able to go home for lunch and still read b3ta 'cos of the byowty of ADSL :)

That is all.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:11, archived)
# Ok, suggestions please...
I need some Summer tunes please, funky, exciting music to either mince around to, jump around to, or lie down and die to. In the Summer.

Name me some kick ass records please. :o)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:07, archived)
# I recommend
'Does your heart go boom' by Helen Love and 'We're indie shit' by the Teen Anthems

and 'Poing' by the Rotterdam Termination Source

good bouncy records
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:09, archived)
# Helen Love!
*boogies gently in chair singing "bang shang a lang"*
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:28, archived)
# The Beach Boys
'Wouldn't It Be Nice'
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:09, archived)
# The Mamas and Papas
California Dreaming
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:11, archived)
# the
sun-ra orchestra - fate in a pleasent mood
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:14, archived)
# Perfect choice Mr.Routine.
I have that as a vocals only on MP3. How relaxing.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:16, archived)
# Wht, thank you....
...have you got the whole box set? I can.....ahem....'provide' it if you wish. It's incredible.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:23, archived)
# Luke Vibert and BJ Cole
'Stop The Panic'. classy summer stuff. also check the classic (best album by them) Red Hot Chili Peppers- 'Blood Sugar Sex Magik'.

also check out the artists on www.chromosome57.com cos they are great and Telefon Tel Aviv started out there and they're my mates.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:10, archived)
# My Secondary School Headmaster was called BJ Cole.
He was, as I have said before, a womble.
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:21, archived)
# Hows about
N*E*R*D - RockStar
Puretone - Addicted to Base
I Monster - Daydream in blue
FC Kahuna - Machine Says Yes
Basement Jaxx - Get Me Off
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:11, archived)
# ooh,
basement jaxx- romeo.. that really gets me "bopping" as my mum would say
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:17, archived)
# Theres a great
chillout version of Romeo. on most of the ministry of sound ones.

I hasten to point out i'm not usually a minitry of sound type of person, but the shillout album it quite nice...
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:33, archived)
# oh well, that's my
IJB up and running now!
thanks!
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:34, archived)
# B3ta Band - Squares
Better than I Monster
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:21, archived)
# travelling
by dela soul and teenage fanclub

(anyone want guestlist for alex wilson at the jazz cafe tonight) email me at [email protected]

www.urban75.org/useless/fighter.html
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:12, archived)
# how about
Lemon Jelly, there album is a collection of theor 3 EP's and te artowrk on it is cool
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:20, archived)
# Jungle boogie

(sorry)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:28, archived)
# I want to listen to big calm
by Morcheeba when I get home
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:43, archived)
# Sly and the Family Stone
Hot Fun in the Summertime
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:32, archived)
# absolutely ANYTHING
by the aceness that is 'A'

'fistral' or 'the springs' for chilling..

'old folks' or 'i love lake tahoe' or 'pacific ocean blue' for jumping round to (or pretty much anything else by them for that matter)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:35, archived)
# Remember those "Save it for Mondays" ads on BBC?
Done by the ginger guy from Lock, Stock...?
Is he the lead singer of A?
They're shit, but that's by the by... ;¬)
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:42, archived)
# no, but i see the similarity
and i love them to bits. so feck you ;P
(, Wed 26 Jun 2002, 12:44, archived)

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