Mrs. Constantine's Camel Toe
I made this!
So apparently it is my first birthday here on B3ta so I re post my #1 video. Happy Birthday to me :D
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:20, Reply)
it's not true that wisdom comes with age
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The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:29,
Reply)
a whole year of not noticing that everyone calls you shit
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Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:40,
Reply)
theres a rule about us saying mean things
or i would say mean things
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tickle I was away, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 18:11,
Reply)
Levitating Balls - Now in YouTuboVision!
I made this!
Some of you may have seen this when I posted the collection of Science from the Sporran episodes a couple of weeks ago, but this is one of the older ones.
As the description says...
"The audacious experimenter achieves the most sublime effect of levitation through the engagement of an imbibition flute and an inscrutable electrical contraption which appears to self-generate wind."
(
TheAlmightyBeev, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:14,
Reply)
Bacon Tuxedo
It's a suit made from bacon.
*goes off humming 'Hover Bacon'*
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:07,
Reply)
Baconize!
bacolicio.us/http://www.mcphee.com/resources/april/items/bacontux.html
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:19, Reply)
That tux is a must gift for Kevin !
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Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:25,
Reply)
Pro Israel rally.
This is scary.
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LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:07,
Reply)
He's obviously taken the most insane twats he could find
and stuck them on a video on the interwebs.
Asking questions like "how many schools do we have to blow up?" is obviously loaded.
As a supporter of Israel I'd just like to say every group has its nutbags, and all those showcased in the video are nutbags - I get quite worried when these people open their mouths, they're just as nutty as the people who were holding the signs saying "We're all hezbollah now" a few years ago.
Then again, go to a pro-Hamas rally and start asking those questions and they'll break the front window of your Starbucks, or something...
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:14, Reply)
It's true.
After years of persecution, quite aside from the holocaust, with the troubles in Poland and with the Cossacks going into ghettos and carrying out beatings and murders it is easy to see why Israel is behaving as it is, after all, it needs to protect the world from the repetition of such cruel acts.
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LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:31,
Reply)
I've never actually heard an Israeli
or any Jew, for that matter, using that argument in genuine debate.
It seems to be more of a myth put about by those who dislike Israel who either believe that that's the reason Israel behaves the way it does or in an attempt to discredit past atrocities.
Israel was established despite the holocaust, not because of it. The reason Israel behaves the way it does is because having a power-hungry organisation throwing rockets at your civilians with the obvious intent to cause psychological and physical harm is sure as hell casus belli.
If you want to moan at anyone about the plight of the Palestinians look at Hamas, which built no shelters for them with their steady flow of money, but instead bought weapons and personal wealth, look at the Arab states which have only ever used them as a distraction and method of furthering their own goals.
Arabs under Egyptian rule are often far worse off than Arabs under Israeli rule - you have the right level of cynicism, you're just pointing it in the wrong direction.
The problem is that maybe only 20% of Palestinian Arabs support terrorist acts, but 100% of terrorist outrages that take place in Israel are performed by Arabs. So when a bomb goes off the Israelis see "The arabs are at it again" and go off on another little quest, as a result the 80% of Palestinians feel they're being unjustly targeted and so turn to justify the other 20%. Hamas knows and knew full well that the rocket fire on Israel will only serve to make Gazan lives worse, they'd have to be right idiots not to know that, and whatever they are they're definitely not idiots. They're using the Israeli reaction to their advantage. But were Israel not to react, what then? More rockets and an oppressive regime, much along the same ideological lines as Saudi Arabia, in power.
If Hamas gets control of a future Palestinian state then you'll just have another Saudi Arabia, but with no oil, so nothing going for it!
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:37, Reply)
What the fuck is wrong with people
Fucking religion
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The Coast Of Yemen, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:52,
Reply)
And sadly the strong must be restrained when dealing with the weak.
Going off on another quest is, essentially, pure evil.
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LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 19:51,
Reply)
Zero Punctuation
This week: Tomb Raider Underworld. Always a pleasure!
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:03, Reply)
Would you say this camera for sale was a bargain?
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Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:43,
Reply)
short answer no.
long answer NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:55, Reply)
yep
this week - tomb raider; underworld.
[ for those rissing: www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation ]
and now you posted it up there ^
damn.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:03, Reply)
I'd like to say I posted it before you
But checking the times tells me we both posted it at exactly the same time. A worthy adversary! :D
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:10, Reply)
What's the point? Indeed.
Honestly, if these two go-getters can't find a job, then, sadly, I think we must all learn to embrace the inevitable.
Thanks for all the fish.
(
zacherynuk @echo off, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:37,
Reply)
Pfffffft!
The best case against state benefits I've yet seen. It's the immigrants' fault isn't it guys? Of course it is. It's not your fault at all. Nope.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:43, Reply)
Yer not a million miles off target though........
They BREED.....
(result?)
We BLEED..... (Taxes)
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:52, Reply)
Been around the world and found...
...That only stupid people are breeding.
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Manofmilk walks without rhythm but still attracts the worm, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:13,
Reply)
Already started
The article says that her Mum had her at 14. They are second generation waste of skins.
If I ran the country I'd introduce mandatory sterilisation for anyone not getting at least 5 higher grade passes at GCSE.
I'm really angry now I've read how ungrateful of my tax pounds they are.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:03, Reply)
I expect it was either immigrants or the teachers
who were at fault when they left school without qualifications too.
Poor, poor couple. What terrible times we live in when good, honest working class couples can't even get a job just because they're lazy.
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:02,
Reply)
On the other hand
I wasn't lazy the moment I left school and I managed to find a job the day after my last exam paying above the minimum wage for as long as I did my work and actually produced something.
This job was given to me by the GOVERNMENT!
The money they gave to me could've been given to these poor sods who obviously didn't have the luck to get off their arses and look for a job that required next to no skills!
...bloody Labour/Tories/Plaid Cymru!
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:17, Reply)
You were so lucky!
What with not being lazy and all.
;)
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:34,
Reply)
I know
I'd hate to be one of those poor, victimised souls who have to bring themselves to turn down jobs that don't look comfortable or have the hours they'd like to have.
It must be horrible to be in a position where you feel you have to turn down a job because minimum wage or a 10 hour day is either not enough or too much respectably.
(okay, yes, yes, I know I said I was paid above minimum wage, but I also worked over 10 hours a day 6 days a week to ensure I gots my moneys and kept my job; people who decide not to take a job because they don't like the wage or hours should be given minimum wage jobs on 8 hour days for 5 days a week enforced by law - yes, it will lead to more tax, but it may just promote the right behaviour which will bring in tax revenue in the long run, and if they don't turn up stuck in a jail - those who do work should then be rewarded above the work they do, with holidays or a nice TV or some such, rewards to ensure they keep on going with their minimum wage job or their training which they can then use to pay for such luxuries themselves. They shouldn't sit around complaining that that £10/hour job which only asks for 30 hours a week didn't get back to them, because there are a thousand other lazy bastards out there who are also edging for that job, and only one of them is going to get it. Hey, who wants to throw rotting vegetables at the degenerates?!)
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:47, Reply)
Pssssst!
I know where we can get vegetables cheap!
;)
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:55,
Reply)
I worked for £3.25 an hour
but it was worth it as it was a 72 hour shift.
Us immigrants do take all the good jobs that the great British working class would just jump at if they had the chance, don't we?
Edit - cheap veg?! Where!?
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Hampster Squared has stuff at www.tilla.co.uk, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 18:16,
Reply)
Quick, to the Dail Mail front page!
"The money covers their tobacco, phone top-ups and so on"
Oh those poor mites how do they survive!
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Manofmilk walks without rhythm but still attracts the worm, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:08,
Reply)
Perhaps the most ronseal thing I've ever seen
It's a dog that explodes. Nothing more, nothing less. And most gratifying in its parsimony.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:41, Reply)
I shouldn't
but I do.
*clicks I like this*
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:03,
Reply)
Simple and entertaining.
This is what we need more of.
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girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 19:01,
Reply)
Reminded me
of this
http://b3ta.com/links/79950
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intesvensk can't recall when I last checked the newsletter, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 20:01,
Reply)
Ahh woke up dis mawnin....couldn't find mah bone...
..mah tummy needs ticklin' and mah goolies done did gone coz ahhhm a dawgie...a dawgie wid dem bloooooooooz
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the_log_knows ..to pay cheeses, to the leopards in your head, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:30,
Reply)
KKK Seamstress and robemaker extrordinaire
Sorta interesting I guess......
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:15, Reply)
4th picture down is more than disturbing.
sickos.
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skeltonator Needs some new daps., Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:28,
Reply)
They consider themselves 'real Christians'
I suppose they missed the bit about loving thy neighbour.
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:57,
Reply)
I think the religious revisionists were at work there
Hence: "Love thy neighbour. Unless his skin colour is a bit different."
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:59, Reply)
Do you think they give out colour grading charts too
rather like Dulux?
Surely that would make life more easy for them.
Oh...now my brain is thinking up an image for this...bloody shame I'm useless with photoshop!
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:06,
Reply)
I'd like to see you go on Dragon's Den with that one
"Yeah, y'see, it's a chart for racists to decide how racist they can be towards someone."
"And who do you think would buy this?"
"Well, racists."
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:12, Reply)
Brilliant!
*runs to drawing board*
*writes letter to Dragons*
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:21,
Reply)
Now my mum's not a racist, but
she does measure 'foreign' by that method. You see, a brown person born outside Britain is more foreign than say a Polish worker born outside Britain.
There are, however, exceptions.
If the dark skinned fellow is born inside Britain then he's obviously not foreign, and if they're from the West Indies then they're also very low on the foreign scale.
The end result is that a man born in Prague is less foreign than a man born in Kandahar, but more foreign than a man born in Jamaica.
I was well chuffed when I broke the code.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:23, Reply)
I'd like that job
just so that I could put some kind of rash enducing chemical on it in a certain pattern, that spells out "I ♥ NIGGERS". Let's see them explain that at their next meet...
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DavyBoyInGravyJoy Grey Goose Vodka on Ice, nothing finer, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 21:32,
Reply)
Jeremy Paxman suprises British MP George Osborne
Paxman delicately balances another hapless interviewee on the point of his rhetorical rapier! What makes this one sided duel more delicious is that both of them come out of Britain's educational elite Ivory Towers; Paxman, St Catharine's College, Cambridge and Shadow Finance Minister George Osborne, Magdalen College, Oxford.
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Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:14,
Reply)
On the contrary, Paxman looks like a bit of a tit
and is cut down to size.
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LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:16,
Reply)
Where's that blog
That thought this was genuine? That was class. In many ways, it's the punchline.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:44, Reply)
I used to read the onion years ago when it was just text
I was totally made up when I went to New York and found their real newspapers in a bar for free. So much better than the metro!
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thiswasmyclone, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 17:09,
Reply)
2008 Guinea Pig Olympics
Erm...ronseal.
But just how do they get them to row the little boats?
;)
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:57,
Reply)
Those pictures are fantastic! They look so cute
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Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:17,
Reply)
awwwww!!!!
So cute!!
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the_log_knows ..to pay cheeses, to the leopards in your head, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:37,
Reply)
As You Can Tell from All the Metal in My Face, I'm Quite the Individual
Where exactly does shoving a bunch of bits of metal through your face, nipples and scrotum really rate on the scale of acts of original individualistic expression?
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:51, Reply)
Wow, a blog.
Um, thanks, i guess.
*Remembers rule about not saying nasty things, so shuts up*
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:04, Reply)
I do hope
That is ironic.
Looking elsewhere on the site, I don't think it is though.
I don't think I like the site or the writer of the site.
(
zacherynuk @echo off, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:11,
Reply)
This has to be a pisstake
I refuse to accept any other explanation
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:23, Reply)
hahhahahahah individual enough to do marketing and work in a steakhouse
Their hive-like minds won't allow them to comprehend any behavior that deviates from what they've been indoctrinated to view as 'normal' or 'rational', and so, as is common to all clones, they respond with revulsion at things their brainwashed subconscious labels as a threat to the herd. I can see it in the glaze of their hypnotized eyes when they hear me clicking my tongue barbell against my teeth during the college marketing class I'm taking, or when I take their orders at the Outback Steakhouse where I work.
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tickle I was away, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:42,
Reply)
On the site it says he was emploed by the onion
this is exactly the sort of humour the onion comes out with, which is why I believe he must be a spoof writer.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:55, Reply)
That's you that is
History today sketch from the Mary Whitehouse Experience, I had forgotten all about this. I remember laughing like a loon the first time I saw it.
(
boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:25,
Reply)
The Sun Fails Again!
The Scottish Sun is reporting that Stan Lee is coming up with the first Gay Superhero
Now click here: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_LGBT_characters_in_comics
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Random Image Yes, yes, I'll speak to you on Monday, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:22,
Reply)
Japanese Blackface Louis Armstrong
He couldn't quite hit those high "R"....or any of them, actually.
(, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:17, Reply)
It's a weird and uncomfortable one
but I'm not on here much and this is already the third time I've seen it posted in as many days
(
Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:18,
Reply)
i h-h-h-h-h-h-h-have a s-s-s-stutter
a-a-a-a-a-and th-th-th-th-that isn't f-f-funny...
(
tickle I was away, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 16:44,
Reply)
its ok tho
he asian and allowed to dress up like a golly wogg and get away with it.
if a white person did that LOOK OUT ITS THE DAILY MAILLLL!!!!!!
(
Captain Pilchard The king of B-movies!, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:28,
Reply)
Rooway Almstlong etc etc
I have seen this so much I feel like he and I are blothers!
(
Flash_Bastard, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:51,
Reply)
Judge Frees Accused Man as Witness is "too honest"
It's all over the papers.
Judge Jamie Tabor QC strikes me as a sleazy lunatic.
A year ago he freed a teacher who was spanking boys as young as 11 as he believed the boys 'enjoyed it'.
Great times.
(
(|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:14,
Reply)
I think I'm having a real dense moment
I don't get that at all, the woman is too believable so her evidence can't be put in for consideration?
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Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:17,
Reply)
Yep, that's right.
This sets a very dangerous legal precedent.
(
(|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:19,
Reply)
It doesn't set any precedent at all.
The judge sounds like a twat, admittedly.
On the other hand, from what I've heard of the story, the identification wouldn't normally sufficient for a conviction - there was no other evidence, IIRC. That being the case, the identification shouldn't have been admissible.
I suspect that the judge just put things very badly. Very badly indeed.
EDIT: Note also that the Indy is here reporting what the local paper says, so there's ample scope for Chinese Whispers.
(
Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:23,
Reply)
That doesn't even make sense
If 'being believable' was something that could disclude you from giving evidence then the whole trial system becomes useless; you can't have a trial without evidence, and you can't have evidence without reputable witnesses.
I'm definitely missing something.
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Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:25,
Reply)
As I said a moment ago...
... I suspect a combination of poor phrasing by the judge and sensationalist and sloppy reporting by the world.
Just a thought.
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Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:28,
Reply)
An out of touch Judge who can't express and explain himself in general terms for the masses,
and the suggestion of sloppy reporting by the media?
Steady on now fella, that's outlandish talk right there ;)
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The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:30,
Reply)
I'd ask you to back up these outlandish claims with random links from the internet
but you'd be here all afternoon doing it with the wealth of examples available ;)
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The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 15:34,
Reply)
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