Not exactly a body mod,
but when I was about 8 I had a stable door-related climbing accident and badly gashed a wrist.

It was stitched and healed satisfactorily, but left a largeish straight grey scar.

Over the years I've noticed many raised eyebrows and 'knowing' looks when people have spotted it. Very puzzling.

Turns out that it exactly resembles a 'cutter' scar. So to certain strangers, I'm obviously a self-mutilator. Great.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:52, Reply)

A friend of mine...
Decided she was going to get a couple of butterflies tattooed on her arse to impress her hubby.

So she headed down to the tattooist, & asked him to get to work.

On recounting the story the next day she informed me that the tattooist had told her he wasn't much good at drawing butterflies, & suggested she get a couple of bees instead.

After mulling it over for a while, she decided to go for it.

Upon returning home, she proudly unveiled the new work to her husband. "Very nice, dear", said he. "But who the fucking hell is Bob?"

/coat
( Sylia Stingray is pilfering the biscuits on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:40, Reply)

Navel piercing. Now available in septic...
Back in t'day when Sylia was at school, & pierced belly-buttons had just come into fashion with the chav crowd, the class dipstick decided she would pierce her own.

With an unsanitised sewing needle. Without anaesthetic. And then put a cheap gold-plated butterfly-backed ear-stud in there. Quite possibly setting a new world record for 'shortest time taken to turn anything green, ever' in the process.

Did give us a good laugh though.

Insertlengthjokehere
( Sylia Stingray is pilfering the biscuits on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:32, Reply)

I have a both a tattoo and a piercing
The Tattoo is a styalised Sun on the front of my right shoulder and the piercing is a ring through my left man-nipple. Well I LOVE it, it feels like... well perminant sexy tiem!

As for the tattoo, when my dad saw it for the first time he made the comment: "It looks like someone dipped the mouth of a jam jar in ink and pressed it to your shoulder!"

Not very good with the insults, my dad...
(Woodgie is back, but for how long?, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:25, Reply)

I painted my hands black
It was 1983, I was 6, I was painting my cardboard rocket ship at primary school and I had got a lot of black paint on my hands, so I did the only sensible thing and completely painted my hands black.

They looked wicked. I decided to start the trend of black hands, soon everybody would be modifying their hands with black poster paint in a craze that would sweep the nation. I started with the boy who sat next to me (Tom), as soon as Tom saw how cool my black hands were he painted his black with glee, of course he did, who wouldnt want black hands???

Well, the teacher for a start, who proceeded to give us a public bollocking & made us wash it off, the small minded nazi bitch.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:21, Reply)

No arm done
An old journalism lecturer of mine had "HIBS" tattoeed on his forearm. I tried to engage him in conversation about the bonnie Embra Hibees but it turned out he supported Aberdeen.

He'd done the tattoo with a compass when he was a kid and then changed his mind about which team he liked.
( calgacus Non sum qualis eram bonae sub regno Cynarae, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:10, Reply)

Soo shit
I've got a black sun tattoo on my arm that I picked so much it now has white speckles all over it. Its shit.
(grazer is sick of looking at houses, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:09, Reply)

not a story
but a good example of taking it too far- NSFW
content.totallycrap.com/media/theperfectpenis/
(repost from main board)
(Symball, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 17:03, Reply)

Worrying comment
Had a nipple piercing many years ago before it became so (relatively) common - great fun, feels like somebody is permanently playing with your nipps.

My father's comment upon finding out was "I wish you were gay, at least I could understand that". He is (so far as I'm aware) straight and has been happily married for coming on for 40 years.

Have now spend 15 years wondering what exactly he meant by that.....
(Copraphag, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:58, Reply)

A dolphin on my arse please
I spent a summer in Pennsylvania many years ago. My friend and I ended up living in a small town, 60 miles north of Philadelphia called Hatfield.
I was designing pre-cast concrete prison cells, the ideal summer break from college.
It was a real typical blue collar American town. No nonsense bars full of burly men in filthy overalls and skanky looking chicks who found no charm in our lithe, milk white Irish frames.
We made no friends, in fact, we made many local enemies through our wholely innocent, yet seemingly homosexual antics.
Is slathering half a bottle of tanning oil over your good friends lean, sinewy body at the local pool a crime?
Anyhow, I digress.
One Saturday morning after a night of bourbon and angel dust, we both decided to procure some skin art at the local ink shop.
Stumbled all the way there, we did. Once inside we spent hours scanning the books, looking for that "wow" factor tatoo.
After much nervous deliberation, I decided upon a cartoon of a dolphin on my right buttock.
As I waited my turn, the respite gave chance for paranoia to get a cancerous little foothold.
I began to view the "Artist", a stone cold lookalike of Paul Snr from American Chopper, with heady mixture of fear and suspicion. He looked like a murderous bastard, I tell you.

Up comes my turn...

"growl...what do want buddy?...grumble... snarl"

"Em....a tatoo of a...eh...Dolphin on my *cough* left buttock"

"SNARLLLL!! GROWWL! GET OUT MY SHOP BUDDY, IT DON'T DO MEN BELOW THE WASTE YOU LITTLE FAG!!!"

Cue me, doing a pathetic comedy style run, pants around my ankles, out of the shop and down the highway, tasting the hot, sour tears as they spilled from my eyes.
(Smell eep!, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:51, Reply)

I shoved a stretched out paperclip through my earlobe for a laugh...
... it's not as hard as it sounds folks, I had my ear pierced 15 years ago, I just havent worn an earring for a while.
It was only when I was halfway through however, that I remembered my earrings were in the left ear.
Oo, Matron!
(LunarJim, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:51, Reply)

Not very exciting
One ear pierced
One medium sized tattoo on inner arm
No interesting stories

That is all.
(fried gold, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:41, Reply)

tattoos
my next door neighbour told me that when
he was younger he
tattoed PIL on his arm.it stood for
something i can't remember what
he said it was but anyway.

he said he thought it was really cool at first. but then
people started asking him why he couldn't spell.

his name was PHIL

.
(i eat crayons, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:35, Reply)

Piercings need to come with warnings
I had my right nipple pierced on Monday of this week. It has a very strange effect on you, well, it has on me.

No one warned me that the right nipple is directly linked to the clitoris and that a new pierced nipple is permanently hard. Mr Chickenlady is slightly perturbed that his wife has become obsessed with sex and keeps propositioning him, friends, strangers, builders…..

Piercings can also cause untold embarrassment.

Last night I went to a black tie do. As usual I had been fretting about what to wear; decided upon a very fetching strapless number (6 actually – I prefer round numbers). I forgot, until sitting in the car en route, that as this strapless dress is quite tight therefore requiring no bra, that the seams inside would rub against piercing. Cue me sitting in a traffic jam attempting to re-position breast whilst being watched by white transit van drivers…hooters all round…as it were…

Anyway, I get to the party and as I am alone (Mr Chickenlady was not available) I decide to drink large amounts of wine in order to calm down….silly, very, very, silly. I then spend an hour or so making rude remarks and laughing at inappropriate moments – like when someone said that they felt a certain amount of sympathy for Heather Macartney because all the press seemed to ‘want a piece of her’ at the moment…pffft…

Later I begin to disgrace myself by leaning over a table and thus ensuring that all those seated around it get a slightly more than brief glimpse of new piercing….

Later still I pop off to ladies for a pee and decide now is the time to show all my friends my nipple….camera phone….emails….and propositions abound…..

Oh and half an hour ago I had the lovely job of washing dessert off the side of the car (don’t worry I wasn’t driving…I was too busy hurling).

So now I feel like a right tit. But I’d better not feel it too much or I’ll get arrested.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:28, Reply)

hmm
I've never had anything pierced. just thought I'd share that with you.
(littlenipple hate's bad grammar, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:26, Reply)

I've
Had my lip pierced 3 times
Arm pierced (Ow)
and done this stupid business of ear stretching where you're basically left with a bloody great hole in your ear

only problem i've had was when i was in primark and i tried to hang a hoodie on a coathanger from one of my lip piercings, oohh the blood oohh the pain, its suprising how heavy they actually areso that had to come out

but being primark i just shoved the jumper back in the rack and walked out like the man i am
( Drunken Vet, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:23, Reply)

Pleasure and Fear
During my first year at uni I was mates with a girl in the third year (read: much more "experienced"). There was also a group of lads that we used to hang out with, who, in that irritating way that guys do, spent most of their time pretending they were macho studs.

One night one of these cocky guys gets it together with my mate... at this point I offer the tenuous link to the question - that she had her tongue pierced... and this is relevant... She decides she doesn't want to sleep with him, but, being an expansive lass she offers him an oral alternative.

Surprisingly, this seems to sour the mood, and seconds later the boy makes his excuses and leaves.

About a week later we learn the truth for the rapid departure. He had gone down to one of his mates rooms to get his advice on what to do; he was terrified that it would hurt because of her tongue piercing.

Ah we laughed.

He was a bit of a tosser.
(Psyche finishes work at the end of June! Yay!!!, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:10, Reply)

I pierced my own ear
when someone dared me to shove a drawing pin through it. I followed up this amazing display of manliness by shoving a proper stud through it and never had a problem with puss, swelling or general mankiness.

Then a year or so back I let a trainee piercer put one through the top bit of my ear, and it was dribbling custard within a fortnight. Sigh...
( Biggus Dickus , it was like that when I found it, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:08, Reply)

A frank and refreshingly honest if somewhat gauche description...
Several years ago my beau and his ol' china plate Dan found themselves in Soho, riding high on giddy post-gig euphoria. Stumbling into a cheap and nasty alehouse they bought themselves a tiddlywink each and meandered to the back bar. There, sat on a bar stool was a craggy blonde of advancing years, in a shortshort mini-skirt and cheap heels, legs mapped with deep varicose veins. Dan promptly went for a wizz, leaving my boyfriend alone with the car crash, who looked him in the eye and awkwardly smiled. She then proceeded to slowly part her wobbly legs to reveal her penchant for going commando as well as the word

"COCK" tattooed on her inner right thigh

and

"PIT" on her left.

There were little arrows too, accompanying the text, unobscured by the creeping pubes.

I hope you enjoyed that. I didn't.
(mistressmuck The broccoli had gone. But the hurt remained., Fri 1 Dec 2006, 16:01, Reply)

On my 18th
I was poked in the eye with a cocktail stick. Right in the middle.

No long term damage though, i think.
(androoh, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 15:47, Reply)

Holes
I´ve had my eyebrow pierced (lost it in a mosh pit dancing to Rage Against The Machine), had my ears pierced (took them out when trying to look more respectable in order to find a job - they never healed anyway). Got drunk and let my friend pierce my ear with a nail. Same friend, same night pierced his own ears then decided to do his nose (by this time there were numerous blackened (from sterilization with matches) and bloodied nails all over our living room table and a rather horrified look on my friend Anna´s face - she´d never seen either of us drink before and by this time the two of us has gone through about 5 bottles of wine). So, anyway, being right handed my friend pierced his left nostril first. Then he decides to do the right one too but, being right handed, he´s piercing down through his nostril from the outside. Anyway, not really feeling much pain due to the booze he goes through his nose, through his lip and unto his gum. Nice.

That is all.
(ComplexStuff Was confused by life on, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 15:34, Reply)

Eye eye captain
Once back when I was a grotty student, my flatmate Stu decided he wanted his eyebrow pierced. Being too poor to pay someone to do it properly, and too drunk and macho to need anesthetic he asked one of us to do it.

I stepped up as I was drunk enough to be non-squeamish, and found a large non-too-sharp safety pin. None of us had any idea of the proper place on the eyebrow to pierce, so I just pinched a flap of skin in the middle, and stabbed away.

I wasn't expecting the effort required to push the pin through the skin, nor the crunching sound it made when it hit something a bit solid. Stu was not expecting the terrible agonising pain, and couldn't help jerking his head upwards.

Then one of the other guys started shouting at us to hold still, and looking down I saw that the pin had pierced the skin on the top of the brow, but had not made it out the other side. Instead it had travelled down inside the skin and appeared under Stu's eyelid. The end of the pin was pushing the eyelid out like the side of a tent. I quickly pulled the pin out and Stu gingerly pressed his eyeball to see it it had been pierced. The drunken gods had smiled on us and his eye was not damaged at all (his eyebrow was another matter).

We actually discussed having another go at it, as the hole was mostly through, but I chickened out of another attempt, and no-one else wanted to try either. After the ragged hole had healed, Stu saved up and paid someone to do it properly. I still think we would have been fine if the safety pin had been sharper.
(d5ve, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 15:29, Reply)

I met a scary Scotish bloke on a train to Preston once
Who was wearing a Rangers football shirt and drinking purple tinnies (Tennants Super).

I noticed that across the knuckles on his left hand he had the letters "G E R S" - I assumed that his other hand had "R A N" across the knuckles to spell Rangers...

Alas no. When he took a swig from his beer a little later I saw that the tattoo across his knuckles spelt the word "FINGERS".
(aroe_m0rre, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 15:20, Reply)

Picture it: I'm 16, and starting college
And I'm slightly scared that I don't know anybody yet. My first lesson of Performing Arts BTEC is about to take place, and I'm not so sure whether I should be myself or try to be someone different.

Oh, and there's a clothespeg on my denim jacket.

Why a clothespeg? I have no idea. There was a washing line in the foreground of the studio where the lessons took place. No clothes were ever hung on it, just a plethora of coloured plastic pegs. I took one off and stuck it to my denim jacket. At 16, I found this was a good conversation piece. Albeit, between me and the janitor.

Luckily, the peg gets me noticed. "Ooh, what's that on your jacket?" "Heh, it's a clothespeg" "Wow! You must be some sort of mental! I'll talk to you for a while!"

The following day, I'm getting ready for college, and I decide to take the crazy peg business up a notch.

I walk into class with it on my ear.

People laugh. I assume, to be friendly. But sticking pegs on your ear turns out to be some sort of retarded act that no man is meant to do. Especially when he's in a new environment of studious people. Nevertheless, I'm adamant that my new crazy peg craze will catch on. It doesn't. But lunchtime, I've still got this fucking peg on my ear.

Can I just say, telling this story is pissing me off. I can''t believe I was such an immature cock.

Anyway, people are pretty much yelling at me now to take the peg off my tossing ear. Eventually, I do. But there's a problem. The metal spring inside the peg has now warped to the shape of the peg in the slightly ajar angle that is my ear, and has began to poke out of the peg.. and embed itself into the soft flesh that is my ear. So, when taking the peg out, I rip out a whole load of waxy flesh.

Tasty.
(__, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 15:06, Reply)

Sadly I was sober at the time...
but I was a 15 year old, trying to be "metal"

ground up a load of pencil leads, cut open my leg, and rubbed them in. 6 years later and I still have a horrible misshapen tattoo that won't fade.

oh, and I wanted a surface piercing, and not having a strong enough needle, just sliced into my arm, inserted a piece of metal and taped it shut so it can heal over it. Yeah. That didn't work.
( John Barrowman's laminated buttocks, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:57, Reply)

Previously
I told how one of my friends got his willie stuck in a typewriter. This would be the same bloke...

He does all his own piercings, some of them good, some of them not so good, but the funniest effort was doing his own eyebrow. He was drunk, funnily enough, and convinced himself that he was going to go for it and made sure we were there to witness.

So he rests his head on a table in the workshop, (someones garage cum workshop style thing) and tentatively presses a thin nail against his brow, now against the table. I'll give it to him, he did it alright, there was a shit lot of blood and........ he got the nail stuck about, oh, an inch into the work surface. Cue all of us laughing as he's stuck to the table, bleeding everywhere trying to pull a nail out without a) taking out his eye, or b) ripping a lump of skin out.

We got the nail out for him, he put in his new bit of metal, and unsurprisingly, it got infected and had to be removed.
( McBadger COW, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:52, Reply)

my mate
had his knob pierced... walk like john wayne for a week and became incredibly unconcerned about pissing blood
same friend also had his toungue pierced without his mothers approval, so hid it and carried a box of cup asoup around in his bag for making at various acquaintances houses... not funny, just an excuse to ask mullered to post a picture or pm me one :D
(Adam Mack, Fri 1 Dec 2006, 14:39, Reply)