I carry a load of shite with me everywhere - and it all fits in my pockets...
-Eyeliner
-Wallet - contains money, bank card thing, drivers license, some card from Caffe Nero that means I can get a free cup of coffee, a dollar bill, confetti and my ticket from Green Day @ Milton Keynes.
-Keys
-Phone (nokia 3510)
-Some form of music playing device
-Spare reeds for my saxophone
-Rizlas for cleaning pads on saxophone
-Two plectrums - one for guitar and one for bass
-Spare e string for my guitar (I dunno either)
-Penknife
-Safety pins
-usually some form of string or something
-Mike Dirnt's plectrum that I got given by the nice security guy at Milton Keynes...

nothing particularly useful - but its all there...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Thu 27 Oct 2005, 18:20, Reply)

pocket contents
I always carry my mobile phone. I hate talking on the phone, only about 4 people have my number, and I rarely have any reason to use it. I only carry it as it has a clock and a torch on it.

I got mugged at knife-point a while back so make a point of not having much cash on me now.

I have finally joined the mp3 revolution and bought a 20gig player. I hardly ever remember to take it anywhere though. I am too used to just humming or talking to myself to drown out the sounds of society when Im out and about.
(dave likes cheese, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:59, Reply)

I carry many items with me,
such as a leatherman, my wallet, my keys, a creditcard-sized flashlight in my wallet, my watch, change.

In my backpack I have a USB drive, stapler, and various other items.

In my car trunk I have:
1) a spare set of clothes - you never know

2) duct tape and a tarp (all I need now is a shovel) - to cover my car in case of natural disaster, see link in my profile for hailstorm aftermath

3) toilet paper - I am lactose intolerant. I drank a milkshake. I was between towns in New Mexico. I had to blast away (ain't I dainty?) behind a large prickly bush. Then as I squatted there, I though "Oh shit what do I wipe with?" It was then that I saw, snagged on a cactus, an old crackly brown paper bag. Who knows where it had been, what it had contained, or who had touched it. I promptly wiped with it. I heard a Nelson-like laugh, and turned to discover, to my horror, that while I was hidden from traffic coming one way, that I was indeed half visible to people driving the other, such as the laughing biker. He almost fell off his bike as he sped by while laughing his ass off. That is why I will always carry toilet paper in my trunk.
(evil_penguin_17 Robots of Doom... Attack!, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:59, Reply)

Always have a book of stamps
for those "Oh fuck it's Mum's birthday tomorrow" moments. I also get a lot of mileage out of my SwissCard, notably the mini-scissors. A USB pen is always in my coat along with two condoms a railcard and three hair-ties.
( Cadmus has teh uplikn coeds at, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:58, Reply)

I have no idea why
This kind of links to last week's question as well. I have in my wallet a chewing gum wrapper that I stole from my first love when I was 12. I have no idea why I can't just throw it away, it obviously serves no use, but everytime I find myself moving to put it in the bin I seem to find something better to do.
Its been there for seven years now.
(Lizzilla, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:57, Reply)

Lint
I am in the habit of carrying around with me rather large amounts of tissue paperin my pockets, due to a combination of hayfever, dust allergy and the tendency to have colds all the time. This has led to neverending supply of ammunition, in the form of tiny rolled up balls of tissue, sometimes used. I've since developed a terrible habit of launching these tiny projectiles at anything that moves, usually accompanied by my childish giggling. Now, you wouldn't think that a tiny bit of tissue would cause much grief but believe me, when they're coming at a rate of about 40 per minute, it can get annoying. Course, I find it highly amusing.

You can always tell where I've been by the trail of carefully rolled up bits of tissue. I'd be the easiest person to track through a forest...

Plus I get to say to the canteen lady (every time, without fail), "Sorry, I only have 45p. Do you accept pocket lint?"
(fox_handybread, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:46, Reply)

Essential items.
I always carry 30ft of 2 condoms with me. Everyone took the piss until they heard I got stuck in a lift, and managed to get everyone off in 5 mins.
( Malchick, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:39, Reply)

I can do "odd".
Rather than posting a list of my pocket contents, which seems to be the fashion, I thought I'd tell you a little story about carrying odd things, and how it's helped diffuse a potential gang-beating scenario.

I do lots of historical interpretation stuff (posh, paid theatrical sort of re-enactment) and often carry a variety of period weapons, costumes etc.

I was once cut up at an island by several burly guys in a car. Naturally, I used The Language of Horn and Flashing Lights to communicate my disapproval. Later in my journey, I ended up in front of them and through the alternating orangey dark and glare of headlights, noticed that they were probably in the mood to follow me and attempt to intimidate me.

Fine by me. I arrived at my venue for the evening, and was just unpacking my cavernous estate's rear when they too pulled onto the carpark.

When I pulled a 6-foot C16th German two-handed sword out of the boot, they left. I never did get the chance to ask them why... or indeed to show them the lovely sharp new Katzbalger (sword) and Messer (dagger) I'd brought along with me as well.
( Doctor When May your wife shat and chipper, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:37, Reply)

Conspiracy!
Is this question designed so chthonic and Rob Manuel know which b3tans to rob in dark alleys?

I used to also carry a "lucky condom" from been about 12 to 14. When I was 14, I finally got a situation where I could use it. My GF pointed out that it was 3 months out of date! Bugger!

/edit. When I say "Bugger", I unfortunately did not mean it literally!
(wonderbrawl was pronounced dead on, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:34, Reply)

When I was younger...
say...10 or 11...I went through a phase of carrying a 'survival kit' around with me. It was an old hot water bottle cover that I'd sewn a strap to to use as a bag (I was a very, very strange child) and in it I kept:

Whatever little money I had
Some fudge
clean undies

I walked around very smugly telling everyone how if I was stranded on a desert island I wouldn't starve and I'd have clean pants.

My brother asked what I'd do when the fudge ran out.
(Pixel, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:27, Reply)

Usual things really
Wallet containing: drivers license, bank cards, cash, notes of appointments I'll probably miss, old bus tickets I keep forgetting to get rid of, fortunes taken from fortune cookies in Chinese restraunt years ago

Key ring with: 2 x House keys (Front door and inner front door), 1 x car key, 1 x multitool gizmo given to me by an ex-girlfriend one Christmas. Has an amazingly sharp knife blade attached (the tool thing, not the ex-girlfriend) which is always useful.

Mobile phone (Nokia somethingorother, no idea what model number it is)

40GB iPod

On the occasions I go out with a bag, I always bring my glasses case (containg glasses) and contact lenses case because I'm convinced one day somethings gonna happen which means I have to take my lenses out and put my glasses on although so far, six years on after starting wearing them, nothing really has.
(Bloch McParty, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:25, Reply)

OK . . .
I don't carry all of these all the time, but:

Money (the odd bit is all the useless foreign shrapnel in there - total US$0.25, FF1.00, €0.10, and 10 Groszy - that's one-tenth of a New Polish Zloty, kids! - as well as £1.86 in presentable (not too corroded) English shrapnel)
USB disk
Phone (obviously) with headset for radio function
A huge bunch of 11 keys, some with no obvious purpose
A small digital video/still camera
AAA battery
256MB mp3 player to drown everyone out and provide cool soundtrack to my actions
Cheap monocular
Small bits of paper
A plastic card torch of surprising brightness
Pens, mostly useless and geriatric
Small change picked up from street, usually corroded beyond recognition
Innumerable bits of paper inc. receipts, the oldest of which has all the text rubbed off, leaving a shiny patina
Several pairs of headphones
A plastic tube containing a cheap lighter (why? I don't smoke! I suppose it's because of the ASBO kids down the road who are always asking me if I've got a light) and some strike-anywhere matches
A board marker, which recently came in useful when I was called upon to draw Beatles moustaches on people
Cool Spetznaz-style hat (either Spetznaz or farmer, anyway)
A semi-precious stone, I can't remember what it's called
Indeterminate pointy things that keep jabbing me
Also sometimes a small whistle which despite being small is fucking loud (100dB or so), I don't know why
Used to carry my cool knife but don't anymore as it does look sort of threatening and has a locking blade.

Also, for a while, a long time ago when someone was making violent threats against me I carried a big fuck-off plank that had come off a protest placard inside my jacket.

All inside a venerable beige jacket I got for about £4 in Primark.


Edit: fucking hell, I just keep on adding stuff. My watch is also probably worth a mention as it has a stopwatch, a countdown timer, 3 alarms and a tiny compass on the strap.
(Radio Free iPods "Fickt nicht mit dem Raketenmensch!", Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:24, Reply)

well fo me it has to be
my pockets
nokia 3220, samsung e720
wallet with no money in but loadsa cards in
keys
batteries
condons (tip must get more)
old mp3 player and a 2 1gbSD cards for it

my bag though has the following -

stanly knife
flat headed knipex snips
glass cutting tool (diamond tipped)
glass breaching tool (to use with above)
bahco narrow chisel (came with snips)
laptop
bluetooth dongle, patch cable
spare batteries for both phones and laptop
and mini flame torch

well not bad for a window mechanic
thank fe3ck i not mentioning the wor bag i have too
( hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:24, Reply)

My Graphic Calculator
To program pr0n.
(Benny A Last Nuclear meltdown:, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:19, Reply)

A wee nipper
When I was about 5 years old I had a dream that I wanted to be a bus...

No, not a bus driver. Or a bus conducter. But, my friends, an actual bus. I planned on been a double decker red bus with an open top. I think I once went on one when I went to London.

I would pretend to be a bus, collect bus timetables and plan my routes to all over my town of upbringing (Bradford).

This was before the days of electronic bus numbers on the front of buses.

My essential item was, therefore, the cardboard tubing found in toilet rolls and kitchen towels. I would write numbers and destinations and place the said toilet roll on my head. I would then "drive" around the house and when I reached my destination, I would spin the cardboard toilet roll tube and my destination would be changed.

The great thing was that, to the utter embarrasment of my mum, I would insist on doing this in public making bus sounds: "Nrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, nrrrrrrrrrr, nrr, pssshhhhhhh. Nrrrrrrrrr"

Now, at 18, I consider myself to be normal.
(wonderbrawl was pronounced dead on, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:16, Reply)

hmmm..
normal shit i think, i used to carry a spare phone battery but it leaked and burned my leg so no more do i carry a small pouch of acid next to my leg .
For about 3 months i carried the tip of a netto style breadknife around with me after some hoodrat minichav tried to mug me (Me 6ft2 bigbadscary goth he 5ft 10stone of malnurished scum)it was so funny he jus kinda leapt out on me with a surprised look on his face so i chinned him and snapped the end of what was obviously his mums best breadknife (wtf?! breadknife) for a keepsake i still have it
Heh
( nomorelifeanymore Tap Dances his way to freedom on, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:15, Reply)

Keys
I rarely move without being attached to a bicycle, so I always make sure i have my pump, puncture repair kit and a multitool on me. Oh and a can of WD40 because there is nothing it can't do.
(drviagra, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:12, Reply)

Me?
4GB pink iPod mini - drowns out chavs

House key - obvious

Eyeliner (black)- you never know

Nail Polish (black)- as above

Bike lock key - for getting bike

Motorola V3 (silver) - it's a crap phone

Nintendo DS - useful at train station

Spare DS games - see above

Retainer box - for my retainer =O

Wallet - contains money

Guitar Pick - really have no idea

Signed My Chemical Romance CD - cause i love em!

Palm top PC - no idea again

Sporks (collapsible and regular) - eating cereal and steak together
(Karl avec un K I am an England fan, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:10, Reply)

Avoidance
It is essential to have the phone numbers of EVERYONE you have ever met, so that if they ring you, you know who they are and can ignore their call, as opposed to accidentally picking up. I've managed to avoid most of my ex-Uni 'mates' (who, in reality, were a bunch of caarnts) with this simple and effective technique.



I have 4 friends.
(Waddo, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 17:04, Reply)

a fairly recent addition to the kit
about 4 weeks ago now a quarter of my tooth broke off (lower L6 i believe) whilst eating soft fresh bread of all things. as much as it freaked me out it was kind of cool having this piece of tooth so i've been keeping it in my purse ever since....i've attempted to use it for payment with my friends (oh, you're getting coffee? i haven't got any cash but will you accept teeth?) and when playing for low stakes roulette, but funnily no one is interested in my tooth. apart from me. sad really. i'll go now.
(firesnake, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:50, Reply)

A car door.
When I get too hot I like to be able to wind the window down.
( grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:42, Reply)

2 folded tissues in left pocket
As my nose is always running. I must be allergic to air or something.
(BourbonBiscuits, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:39, Reply)

everything I need really
sony 750i, so I've always got a camera, music and phone. Swiss army knife so I've always got scissors, bottle opener, can opener philips scredriver. Wallet with amex, switch, visa and £20, access cards, and photos of dog, wife and daughter and micro led torch, driving license. Toilet roll, so I never get caught out and can always blow my nose in case of bogey attack.
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:37, Reply)

Ahem
Everywhere I go, I always take the weather with me.

That and the nagging feeling that I left something in the flat switched on that will ensure the whole building is but a burnt out shell by the time I return.
(tallulah kittiwake, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:34, Reply)

My bag comes everywhere with me
Just emptied it out & found:
Phone, purse, other peoples bank cards, notebook, keys, a false mustache, one glove, camera, lip balm, heat pack, a few o2 sim cards, a kinder surprise thingy, teeny weeny ten pin bowling set from last years xmas crackers, lollipops, a lump of plasticine, plasters, wee screwdriver, massage oil, several different coloured pens, eyelash glue & manky pink lipstick.

All of them have come in useful at some point.
(deadly, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:33, Reply)

Being a geek...
Everything is always in the same place, so I know where it is.

Belt, left hand side:
Leatherman
Gerber
Phone (Nokia 6680, so interweb and stuff is included. Natch)
Maglite

Right hand top trouser pocket: Keys (attached to belt).

Back: Wallet.

Left top trouser pocket: Handy dandy cat5 adaptor. It's a footlong cable in a little box, with a switch on it to make it x-over. USB pen drive.

Wallet contains: driver licence, work IDs for everywhere I work, swipe cards, my own business cards and any handy ones. Money, obviously. Train tickets and various other receipts. Nothing interesting.

Bag. That's a little more different. This gets carried around a lot with me. Laptop, USB pen drive (another one), bluetooth dongle, camera, a bit of food, my Oakleys, spare hair elastic things, a USB AB cable, a short XLR patch lead, a short jack lead.

Blimeh. That's quite a lot really.
( shadyron, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:29, Reply)

Used to carry.....
condom's all the time!

Until I had the idea that they must give off some sort of anti shag scent that women pick up on if they get within ten feet of you.

Now I just carry the usual, wallet, phone keys.

*On the plus side I now have a much better chance of pulling, on the negative side i'm now the father of six unwanted brats and a cock that looks like its been slammed in a car door!*






*some of this might lies*
(El Cabron, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:25, Reply)

keys (usb and house), wallet, mp3 player and about a hundred scraps of paper with important info on them
as well as 2 maglites, a leatherman, digital camera, waterproof gloves, and one of those little round dental mirrors for peeking out from under manhole covers (seriously).
( cheesemaster a screaming naked asian man driving a semi, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:24, Reply)

Bottle Opener ???
I was taught the art of opening them with my teeth by a girl in my first year at uni! She could open bottles with other things as well...


Brickwalls, keys, knives, lighters etc. Why what were you thinking?

I also carry around an american Quarter. I was given one in some change and past it to a friend for luck. At that point I noticed another with exactly the same year in my very hand. Hazaa, luck for me too. We both still have them in our wallets.
(The Duke of Pontefract, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:19, Reply)

Cat-5 and more...
...oh my. It seems like EssY is a person after me own heart.

Pockets: Cybertool, mobile, change, card case (got tired of a bulky wallet), folded bills, keys, USB keys, Tux microlight, and a pen/pencil.

Briefcase (hereafter known as my 'bag of tricks'): Cat-5, a handful of homemade RJ45 adaptors/converters, various Knoppix discs, assorted bits of code, train schedules/maps, adddress book, business cards, screwdrivers, diagonal cutters, narrow pliers, felt-tip marker, digital camera, SD chips & card reader, battery, sunglasses, and a various other things I can't recall. Usually a book or two, and presently an iBook. The last item pleases me greatly.

Length? Fear not, the Cat-5 is longer...
(dragonman97, Thu 27 Oct 2005, 16:17, Reply)