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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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This dickhead I work with overheard me saying that I hadn't seen the final of SCD yet
So he made it his business to find out who won and say it loudly enough for me to hear over my headphones. What absolute fucking cunt.

What's pissed you off lately?

Alt Q - fuck the fuck off, make up your own Alt Q
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:31, 326 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I am trying to sympathise, I really am.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:32, Reply)
Montsie baby, I love you.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:37, Reply)
You too 'bbz'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Aww!
That makes it mean so much more to me.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)
No Lampito, its "hurry down the chimney tonight" after the comma.

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
Worst. Euphemism. Ever.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)
He's more partial to my coal chute.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:55, Reply)
I'd naively thought he was after one of these


When he said that all he wanted for Christmas was a good long coal scuttle.
(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)
You fucking homo.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:33, Reply)
^this

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:44, Reply)
You fucking homophobe.

(I helped save b3ta! disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)
You fucking FAG ENABLER
sorry, I really need to cancel my subscription to the Westboro Baptist Church parish magazine
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)
My 90 year old nan loves SCD
So does every female member of my family.
None of the males do. In fact, you are the only man I know who does like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:35, Reply)
No-one I have any dealings with whatsoever watches it
apart from DF.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)
I am proud to occupy this unique spot in your estimation

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)
It would have saved a lot of bother if you'd just watched it, Darth.
Given your interest/expertise, I would have thought that you would have been parked in front of the telly.
(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)
Really, really busy weekend
Most frustrated to have missed it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:48, Reply)
What is SCD?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:37, Reply)
Strictly come dancing.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:37, Reply)
I really dislike the way fans of the show refer to it as "Strictly"

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:39, Reply)
Me too
There's nothing remotely strict about it. The fucking salsa. I ask you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)

refer to it as "Strictly" are allowed to remain alive
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)
Can I claim a special dispensation for my elderly Mum? She's had a hard life and doesn't get out much.

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)

the
refer to it as "Strictly"

Me too old boy, me too.

I AM HOPELESS.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)
Psst, bbz
Knock out the "way"
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:43, Reply)
I really dislike way fans of the show
TOTALLY WAY MAN
(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:44, Reply)
SHYA DUDE.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
it's one long strikethrough now dude

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)
I give up, dude.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:05, Reply)
I would be more likely to watch if it was Sexually Communicable Diseases.
And this week's winner, with tertiary syphilis AND the Bad AIDS, Daniella Westbrook!
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:39, Reply)
I explained "The Bad AIDS" to a lesbian yesterday
she wasn't impressed.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:41, Reply)
You obviously weren't wearing a low cut top.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:42, Reply)
haha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)
It was over FB Chat
I'm going to running tackle hug her, and due to momentum probably break every bone in her body. She's hot. Really, really, fucking hot.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)
Link photos then duh

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)
That's a bit creepy.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
Hey we've met right?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)
It's totally not creepy if you've met before.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:57, Reply)
That and I'm very charming and witty.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)
It's funny because you are totally that thing.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)
We know each other.
Intimately.

But I am not giving you permission to whack off to my lesbian friend.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
Strictly Come Dancing
Yes, Bruce Forsyth is still alive.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)
That should be it's sub title.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:39, Reply)
When he finally kicks the bucket, I think we need a reality TV reanimation extravaganza.
It's be awesome, you could pit folks with zombie dust and voodoo against someone trying to build a robot skeleton out of Lego Technics and a mad-scientist type with a lightning rod. And whoever wins, we get a shambling, drooling monster with a taste for human flesh - it'll be like he never died.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:43, Reply)
once again you deliver
TV Gold!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)
He's never going to die
We need to find new, less annoying, uses for him
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:41, Reply)
Have you seen Cyriak's Brucie animation?
It's pretty fucking amazing.

Here we are, on BBC- think it's on Youtube too
www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/clips/p006hrf2/cyriak_brucie_-_the_forsyth_saga/
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:43, Reply)
When Brucie does finally die, he'll be having an open coffin at his funeral.
He discussed it with his family, and they agreed that it 'would be nice to see him, to see him nice'.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)
*waves*
Hello bud!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)
*Waves*
Morning Blousie!

It's snowing again :(
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:47, Reply)
Aw!
Is snow fucking bent Jeff?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:48, Reply)
Depends on whom you are fucking in it, Blousie.
ALthough I fear one's cock might drop off with the cold. 'Doggy' might be the way to go to save knacker to snow contact.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:49, Reply)
Yeap.
I wish it would just fuck off.

How are you today?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:50, Reply)
Still snotty.
My sinuses are killing me.

I do have Biscuit and Benji with me this morning so that is good.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)
Yay for dog company.
Boo for snot.

Are you feeling better than you were yesterday?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)
Yeah! much better.
I'm ok really apart from feeling like my head is full of concrete.

What are you up to today?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)
I'm going to spend today complaining about the snow.
I might go to the supermarket later on too.

But I might not.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:02, Reply)
Why not go out and throw snowballs at old people?
It would make their day a bit more exciting.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:05, Reply)
Old people are fucking bent.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)
Yes, they are.
It's called 'spondylosis'
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)
Hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:13, Reply)
They should make his raddled old corpse do that thing he used to do on the Generation Game.
Anthea Redfern.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:47, Reply)
Heh.

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:49, Reply)
Sucking cocks daily.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)
What's white and slithers across the ballroom?
Cum dancing.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:39, Reply)
hahahahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:40, Reply)
This joke has been brought to you by Time Team.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:43, Reply)
I'm trying to keep the old days alive Monty.
You above all should understand this.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:45, Reply)
Every cunting thing has pissed me off today
I have been up since six listening to fucking christmas music and I have far, far too much stuff to do today, because I'm being forced to host a christmas party tomorrow. I have to bake a fucking cake, for fuck's sake.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:46, Reply)
Even I can bake a cake
As long as it doesn't have to be a very good cake. You can't go wrong with Victoria sponge
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:49, Reply)
A lot can go wrong with Victoria Sponge.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:50, Reply)
Again, I never said it was GOOD Victoria sponge
I was aiming for "edible", and I managed it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:55, Reply)
I bake brilliant cakes
I just really, really can't be arsed doing it, and resent the fact that just because I *can* bake, people assume I want to bake them cunting cakes for free all the time.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)
I like to say "no" a lot
it's free, it's fun and now no cunt ever asks me to do anything for them. Of course, I never get invited out anywhere by anyone and spend most of my days weeping alone in my house, but it's worth it!
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)
Yeah, but it's usually family
Or really good friends, so I would feel a bit horrid saying no. Plus, they're used to me being absolutely and utterly useless in any other respect, so it's nice to surprise people from time to time.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:01, Reply)
Still, if it's inconvenient to you
you shouldn't feel obligated to say yes.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)
It's not inconvenient
I'm just really, really lazy. I prefer to do the sum total of nothing on my days off, any obligations ruin it for me.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
Still your salty tears will help to keep your path clear.

As you'd hate to slip and hurt yourself as you made your way down to the shed to string yourself up.
(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:01, Reply)
Knowing me I'd break my neck on the crazy paving
and at the last prove beyond all doubt that I am the utter loser I know myself to be. A man so utterly tragic that he even manages to fail at suicide.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:05, Reply)
Surely it;s only fair for you to tell people
that cakes cost money to make, so it'd be fairest for them to cough up for the ingredients and your time - which would still be cheaper than them buying a cake of commensurate quality? They'd either pay you or fuck off
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)
See above
Although I don't think people really appreciate how much money it costs to make a decent cake.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:02, Reply)
I would like to thank whoever it was on here
who recommended I watch the copy of 'Dead Snow' that my brother gave me. I had an hour and a half of my life that I wanted to completely fucking waste watching a load of total awful boring fucking toss, and it really fitted the bill, so, thanks!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:51, Reply)
To be fair
it could have been any number of these fair denizens.

Nazi Zombies, right?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
*sighs* yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:55, Reply)
I haven't seen it.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)
Do yourself a favour and don't.
It's a 'knowing' genre-referencing black comedy.


Trans: it's a heap of fucking gay shit with tired cliches and nothing funny at all about it at all: avoid like the plague.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)
I fear that my busy schedule* may prevent me from doing so anyway.
*muttering about the price of butter, the state of the roads and wondering where I've left my keys. And what constitutes 'fashion' these days. Have you seen the kids wandering around with their jeans slung below their arses? I ask you.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:04, Reply)
Jeans below the arses was years ago DG
Do try to keep up, darling
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
Not round here, unfortunately.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:09, Reply)
Really?!
How far North do you live?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)
South east corner of the Northumberland.
Which probably explains it.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
Ah yes
I believe that in the UK guide book Northumberland is described as "Worse than Scaro"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:22, Reply)
We have some fucking excellent castles.
Monty would back me up on this one.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
I believe Scaro has some interesting topographical aspects
That doesn't mean I'd want to go there
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)
Maybe you should come over to mine and we can
play some Nazi Zombies together. It's a videogame.

You like them, right?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
Totally love them. With all my heart.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)
MASSIVE LIES ON LINE, RIGHT HERE!
God, you'll be doing massive drugs next and claiming you once touched a woman.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:55, Reply)
Unfortunately you get to kill the Zombies
not lead them and take over the world.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:58, Reply)
Maybe he should play Dungeon Keeper?
Sadly, Monty, that's not a Fritzl version of The Sims.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:59, Reply)
Maybe I shouldn't.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:03, Reply)
I can imagine you as a Dungeons and Dragons
Master actually.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:05, Reply)
Please don't. I feel soiled.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:09, Reply)
"You open the door to see Hitler doing Massive Drugs off of your mum's tits"
"Himmler pulls out a wicked SS ceremonial sword and advances. Roll for initiative".
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
"Now deduct your untermenschen modifier, and... oh dear, Himmler's superior Aryan genes allow him to slay you like the filth you are."

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)
It's a click from me here.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:22, Reply)
also from the resident role player

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:31, Reply)
*puts on robe and wizard hat*

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Hahaha!
I was one of them. Did the nazi theme not make up for all the zombies then?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:53, Reply)
No, it did not.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:54, Reply)
Oh well!
Can I recommend The Horde. It's a French zombie film with drug dealers in it.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:57, Reply)
No, you may not recommend it.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:00, Reply)
like you would have spent the time wisely otherwise

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)
How are you doing, Darth?
Are you holding up OK? It's always good to have your family and friends around in difficult times like these, I hope yours are rallying.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 10:56, Reply)
I'm going to wear a ribbon to rase awareness of his plight.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:02, Reply)
What colour? All the good colours have gone
AIDS got in quick and bagged red.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:06, Reply)
I'm amazed
that I'm the first person to reply "pink"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)
Mindpiss.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
Breast Cancer got there first
just like Kylie
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
What's pink? Breast cancer or something, I think.
How about a nice pastel baby blue?
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:07, Reply)
That's the cot death ribbon

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
God, there's a bloody coloured ribbon for every stupid little thing.
What about something IMPORTANT, like Darth's plight?

Stupid, selfish dead babies.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)
perhaps you need a very specific shade
like puce or cerise?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)
It should be encrusted with diamante studs.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
or spunk.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:09, Reply)
Or both.
For that 'really gay' look. And perhaps a simple little picture of a prolapsed anus.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Fuck you DG
and your ninja fingers. I was typing "encrusted with rhinestones" but decided to go for the generic "glitter" down there.

Seems we're all predictable when it comes to Darth's rampant queendom.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
In this complicated universe
it's a comforting thing that some things are constant.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)
Also, if you want to go for a little glitter 'down there'.
Go right ahead. Apparently it's quite fashionable nowadays.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:13, Reply)
Are you suggesting she glam up her clam?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)
Clitter!

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
I like this!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
It's not my joke, I'm afraid

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)
If anything, the fact that it's actually called "Vajazzling" is even funnier.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)
what?!
that sounds amazing
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:19, Reply)
A friend of mine suggested we double-team and get that together
Unfortunately mine would just sit alone in my knickers, unseen. No dick would dance below the disco ball of my mons pubis.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
Surely it would provide an unnaceptable level of abrasion?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:21, Reply)
When you have sex, do you rub your dick along the mons pubis?
Fuck no. As far as I know the gems are limited to there.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
Not usually, but I'm not keen on grating the tip of my nose off.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
Point.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:28, Reply)
For some women, it would give the level of purchase required
Like using sand as a lubricant.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
what possble function could it serve?
by the time someone's looking, they are pretty much distracted. Unless of course boys only like sparkly bit now
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)
It'd be the only way to get Darth to take a second look.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Haha, totally this.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:30, Reply)
They were talking about it on the radio the other day.
I nearly choked on me werthers!
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:21, Reply)
I have a wonderful picture of a misprinted Girls Aloud bio
entitled "Dreams that Clitter"
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Aye, all the classy birds are getting vajazzled.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)
A friend told me about vajazzling
But I was too drunk to believe her. Why oh why would a woman consider it even a remotely good idea? Make it neat and presentable, sure, but don't make it look like it should be fastened with magnets to a fridge.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
I did want a dermal there
That would look cool. But I can't :(
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)
That is gutting
Maybe surface bars would work?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
I'm off surface bars
With dermals I have seen the light. They are so, so much less fuss than surface bars.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:28, Reply)
Yes you really are, generally
But some of the ideas being chucked about here are making me chuckle.

Also; dried-on spunk looks a bit like glitter, so I think Lampito's idea wins
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)
o_O
...not sure what I can say to that.

I feel a bit sick.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
At the spunk/glitter comparison?
Or because I paid you a vague compliment? Don't worry, you can't catch it by association
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
The dried on spunk.
I'm a bit funny about bodily fluids.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
Noted
with apologies
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:22, Reply)
this isn't some kind of originality competition
you're a raving bertie woofter, and we are telling you so.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)
To be honest, we're not that original when it comes to the "Crow"n Prince of Bumming.
Just take 2 LIMP WRISTS, a GAPING ANUS and a COQUETTISH WINK, bung it in a TEAPOT and MINCE AROUND A BIT until it's nicely incorporated.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)
^ this

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
Haven't you got baking to do, woman?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
I find it amusing that someone who acts more like a woman than I do
Is trying to be a chauvinist.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:21, Reply)
I'll admit I'm bad at chauvanism
but it seemed more inventive than "fuck off"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)
Bless
You're worse than someone who is PMS-ing, you really are. Lighten the fuck up, I thought you homosexualists were all happiness and sunshine?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Not when people ruin our SCD-related fun we're not
I actually want to Jive on my dickhead colleague's throat. Whilst being partnered by The Widdecombe.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:31, Reply)
Even she isn't that desperate for a partner

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:33, Reply)
Sorry
What part of "fuck off" above are you struggling to comprehend?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)
Why aren't I allowed to join in the fun of calling you a bumder?

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:39, Reply)
My apologies
ALL of you fuck off

Better?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:45, Reply)
Thank you

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:46, Reply)
Look at us being civil to each other
I'm not sure I like it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:51, Reply)
Season of good will, innit?

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:55, Reply)
Let's see how many B3tans that extends to
In the interest of the same, I should say that I actually have no problem with Northumberland, and would like to apologise for insinuating that it bore resemblance to a planet wasted by a millennia-long war of attrition
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)
S'alright darth.
Internet banter.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:11, Reply)
I really need to get my head around this concept, don't I

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:12, Reply)
I know, that was civil, wasn't it.
I don't like it, it feels dirty.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:02, Reply)
And dirty is... bad?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:05, Reply)
Valid point.
I should have said "I feel a bit sick".
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:12, Reply)
I have that effect on a lot of people
It's the face that does it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:14, Reply)
The 'soon to be on the telly' face!

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:16, Reply)
Yep
I fully expect emergency services to be inundated with calls as several million people spontaneously lose their lunches at exactly the same moment
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:19, Reply)
You two are like the Batman and Catwoman of O/T
At each others throats one minute, the next, teaming up for the greater good.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:12, Reply)
Plus, Darth looks great in a catsuit
He even brings his own.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:15, Reply)
Wrong on both counts
Especially the first
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:21, Reply)
What a shame
You could buy one for the sake of saving /OT though, right?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:22, Reply)
Why on earth would I have any interest in saving this motley bunch of miscreants?
I doubt they'd thank me if I rode to the rescue in something that tight
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:24, Reply)
Yeah, but if you're not catwoman that means I have to be.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:25, Reply)
We could take a vote on it
But I'm pretty confident that given the choice of you or I in a PVC catsuit B3ta, and indeed the sighted world, would prefer you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:28, Reply)
Let's ask them.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:29, Reply)
This can't end well for you
Either B3ta votes that you have to be Catwoman, or that they'd rather see me in a catsuit than you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:32, Reply)
That's what I want to know.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:34, Reply)
That is by far the greatest compliment any B3tan has ever given me

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:16, Reply)
You're certainly bad at spelling it.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)
I raise my glass to your father.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:20, Reply)
I'd prefer purple
It's on-trend
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
'nigger brown'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:08, Reply)
My parents first ever 3 piece suite was that colour
that was in the 70's
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
All suites were that colour in the seventies it went with the "day old spunk magnolia" walls and "monkey shit brown" carpet.

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)

swirly monkey shit brown, remember
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:18, Reply)
I was watching the Swedish Wallander
and a suspect was a black guy, but they kept calling him "The negro" and there was real distaste everytime they mentioned "the negro". I bet they changed the tone for the English version, which is a shame because I would love to see Kenneth Brannagh say that he was looking for a darkie.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:19, Reply)
'Honky white'

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)
Glitter.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:09, Reply)
That's a little unfair.
Darth's a queer, not a paedo.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)
hahaha
b3ta is FUNNY today.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)
Dur!
Rainbow!
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:11, Reply)
Oooo Zippy!

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:12, Reply)
hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:14, Reply)
My cousin just asked me when I'm going to grow a beard.
I said when I gain the ability to do so, then he called me gay. Little bastard has my number.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Why don't you just steal a beard?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
BEARD MASTER!

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)
I was thinking of nabbing one of those plastic glasses, nose and moustache disguises from the local joke shop but I don't think it'd be the same.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:21, Reply)
first hint of snow and everyone on the roads turns into an utter belming retard
Ninety fucking minutes it took me to get into work this morning.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
cannot physically drive out of my very long, steep road
the minute it snows you end up driving like Eddie 'The Eagle' Edwards
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:16, Reply)
Last night I had to walk up my very
icy road to my cold and lonely house only for the fuse for the lights to blow.

This morning I put a bath on, only to return to find I'd only turned on the cold tap and it was overflowing. And I'm nearly out of milk.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:15, Reply)
If you're expecting sympathy, I think you've come to the wrong website.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:17, Reply)
he asked what had pissed me off
I answered. I think I got all the sympathy I'm gonna get last night
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:19, Reply)
Blimey, you've become a character in the opening scenes of a rom-com.
Your Mum will be on the phone nattering on about you finding yourself a nice young man shortly, and you'll probably experience slight feelings of "kookiness".
(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
fuckity fuckity fuck
something about big knickers and chocolate
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)
has anyone noticed what number 66 is in the charts..?

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:21, Reply)
Funnily enough, no.
Is it Glenn Miller?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
Al Martino, I'd wager. In fact I'm going to buy the sheet music myself, this very afternoon.

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
I don't even know what number 1 is
Although it should be this

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:23, Reply)
yeah!

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
Yes
Twitter, Facebook and /links told me.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:24, Reply)
alright bitch
I did have a quick look to see if anyone else had pointed it out, but I did that man-looking there where I took a 3 second glance in one place and declared it not to exist.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Can you do that woman-looking thing and find my other set of car keys?
I think they're in the snow by my front door or garage door.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:28, Reply)
No they're not, I would have seen them when I was dusting my footprints away

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)
Who the hell was in my room last night,
Who the hell was in my bed?
*rocks out*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:34, Reply)
No.
And I'm too lazy to check.

Can you tell us?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
It's Kunt & The Gang
delightfully named 'use my arsehole as a cunt'.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:27, Reply)
I should have guessed.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:29, Reply)
of course they haven't

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
It's mentioned on the Home Page

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:25, Reply)
no one goes there anymore

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Just like Dunstable

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:29, Reply)
I think Al has a holiday cottage there

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:30, Reply)
It's full of very stiff and very smelly socks

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:36, Reply)
I stopped paying attention to pop charts in 1993

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:26, Reply)
When you realised that "Saturday Night" by Whigfield was the hight of musical achievement?
and could never be bettered
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:29, Reply)
Was that year the Ace of Bass year?
and 2unlimited? I think it was that year that I decided that music could no longer evolve.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:30, Reply)
It sure was
I was 16, I had just passed my GCSEs and I thought I was fucking hilarious because I would sing "No No, No No No No, No No No No, No No, There's no LYRICS"

what an arsehole
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:34, Reply)
I remember doing that too
which was stupid, right, because there actually were lyrics. Pretty deep ones, too.

Man, kids are dumb.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)
I used to watch the chart show because I fancied the woman from 2-unlimited
I bet if I Youtubed it, I would find out she was a bit of a munter
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:46, Reply)
I seem to remember she looked a bit like Paula Abdul
only chavvier.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:47, Reply)
Huge norks, though.
Maybe that's why they were called 2 Unlimited?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:49, Reply)
Genuine lol here.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:50, Reply)
She looked like an Albanian prozzie.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:50, Reply)
Could be worse I s'pose
she could be a smelly african
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:54, Reply)
haha that was the first tape my sister ever bought, Now 32 or something.
It also had Michelle Gayle on it.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:31, Reply)
She sang at my mates uni
and she ran off crying because everyone chanted "get yer tits out"
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:35, Reply)
she was on come dine with me a bit ago
she's well annoying.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:44, Reply)
She was excellent in 'Fresh & Fly'
with Danny Kendall on the ones & twos.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:45, Reply)
Passive-aggressiveness has pissed me right off
It's actually beginning to ruin Christmas a bit here
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:31, Reply)
make that your facebook status and out-passive-aggressive them all

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)
Whose?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)
My mother
she's acting very cool with me, keeps doing the huffy 'nothing is wrong'
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:35, Reply)
What have you done to her!!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:39, Reply)
Not you as well!
Nothing actually. And no-one else has any idea .
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:57, Reply)
You terrible daughter you
You don't even know what you've done.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:23, Reply)
I just can't believe that SOME people don't know when they've pissed me off
If they were decent human beings they'd know to apologise for what they did.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:32, Reply)
did you see the guy on Chickenlady's facebook
saying that diabetes is psychosomatic?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:34, Reply)
WHAT?!!
I sure hope to fuck that they're good friends and it's a massive, if rather off joke. Else I'll have to punch him repeatedly while yelling "It's ok, your new face cancer is psychosomatic!".
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:36, Reply)
^this
sounds like an especially poor joke or just massive cuntishness
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)
he wasn't even trying to be cunty
was serious, getting pissy when PJM argued, saying that his citations weren't good enough.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)
Holy fucking shit
I just skimmed some of that, the fucking nerve on that guy.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:41, Reply)
although I did quite like it when he said
"and to save anyone else the trouble, i forgot to end the thread by comparing myself to hitler"

He was a douche, but that was funny.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:44, Reply)
Yes it was
Wait a minute, didn't Hitler think being a Jew was psychosomatic? Oh, no he did not.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:47, Reply)
the lesser known quote
"I think, therefore I am.....Jewish"
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:49, Reply)
Semito Ergo Sum?

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:50, Reply)
Cogito Ergo Frugal Christ-Murderer

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)
I don't know what means but it amused me anyway

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:06, Reply)
antisemiticlols

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:07, Reply)
no, it was serious
it was pretty much a full-scale WTF? pandemic
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)
Christ, yeah I saw that.
The bloke genuinely couldn't see that he'd caused major offence.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:39, Reply)
he couldn't see that he was a retard either
you can say that some illnesses might be psychosomatic, but something like that?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:40, Reply)
He was Asian, I believe.
Obviously of the 'shopkeeper' variety rather than 'doctor'.

I'll get my coat now, shall I?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:42, Reply)
You can't. One of them Kosovans has nicked it,

(Cave Duck, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:47, Reply)
Bastards.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:48, Reply)
I bet that went down well

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:37, Reply)
About as well as Darth does
in a straight brothel, I'd wager.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:43, Reply)
ha ha ha,
that's really genius. I bet he thinks that prayer is a proven way of healing.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)
I just read it expecting it to be lol
but it's actually really uncomfortable reading. He seems proper autism.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:46, Reply)
yeah, it seems funny
but the guy was totally serious and didn't seem to understand why people got upset.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)
Yes, he failed to see that a live-threatening illness could possibly be emotive
He was utterly unapologetic (sincerely I mean) and belligerently ignorant.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:54, Reply)
It is, right?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:41, Reply)
Haha.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:41, Reply)
Haha
I have actually pointed it out to her. I don't do passive-aggressiveness. If you're annoyed or angry at least say why rather than acting like a twat and eroding any feeling of genuine remorse that I might've had
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:36, Reply)
Exactamundo
I hate passive-aggressive bullshit, it's pure cowardice and beakering.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:38, Reply)
Ugh this
nothing is more guaranteed to get me acting like a cunt than people acting as though I've acted like a cunt without actually telling me what piece of cuntishness has got their backs up this time.

IT'S EVERYBODY ELSE'S FAULT.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:41, Reply)
I'm so bad at passive aggressiveness
during the whole me v Wiggy cleaning debacle I spent so much time and energy passive aggressively only doing my own washing and cleaning he didn't bloody notice, so eventually I had to say "look what I've been doing, aha!" and he just said "yeah I thought the place looked cleaner". GRRRRR
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:46, Reply)
Men don't notice filth as much, on the whole.
we're not trying to be difficult, I promise.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:49, Reply)
I love how much that backfired on you
You deserve it :p
I just hope for Wiggy's sake that you never do the "Nothing's wrong" shit when there clearly is something wrong, you just won't say.
Men are shit, women are crazy.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)
haha no
I don't even wait for him to ask me what's wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:56, Reply)
Good
You probably invented it anyway, then let it fester in your mind. I bet you've yelled at him for things he's done in your dreams too.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:58, Reply)
OMG the missus has totally done that with me before!

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)
Did she cook you a slap-up meal to apologise?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:02, Reply)
No :(

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:10, Reply)
Very harsh indeed :(

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:16, Reply)
I kind of do the dream thing
only the other way around, I dream that I've cheated on him and then I feel immensely guilty for several hours.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:07, Reply)
You do that rather a lot, don't you
You're a terrible hussy.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:09, Reply)
I really do, my mind is such a slag!

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:19, Reply)

really do, my mind
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:24, Reply)
innit

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:27, Reply)
*high fives*

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:28, Reply)

+ with Vipros.
+ Again.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:09, Reply)
I'm like Freddy Kreugar
but instead of killing you, I invade your dreams and sex you up

with a glove covered in dildos
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:19, Reply)
I just wish you wouldn't insist on high fiving at the end

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:20, Reply)
I'm imagining a splatter similar to opening a yoghurt lid too agressively

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:21, Reply)
you said that was your favourite bit!

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:22, Reply)
With my ex
I tried going on strike to make a passive agressive point about him doing the sum total of fuck all useful, ever.

When I left him there were plates that hadn't been washed in over six months. I'm surprised I didn't get cholera in that place, I really am.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:53, Reply)
Our IT support people
have given us a hamper filled with old-skool sweets.

The fat girl in my office is on the verge of masturbating.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)
With a sherbet fountain?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:56, Reply)
A Wham bar, actually.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:58, Reply)
Appropriate.
Also, the effect of the little fizzy bits they have in them would, I should imagine, be quite stimulating when rubbed in just the right place.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)
She's using Flying Saucers as well
for a surprise buzz. I don't envy the cleaner who takes that chair for disposal
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:03, Reply)
Good Lord!
Do they have 'Ridgeley' sides 'for her pleasure'?
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:02, Reply)
I don't knowe
but it looks like she's left a streak of Highland Toffee up the back of her massive pants.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:06, Reply)
Hahaha!
Get her to play drums with you; and wear only brown and white. Call yourself 'The Shite Stripes'.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:10, Reply)
This does not warrant a thread but...
I just couldn't keep it to myself; be sure to watch all the videos....they only get better....Cyber Goth Dance Routines!
www.readplatform.com/cyber-goth-dance-routine-sunday/
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:55, Reply)
Seen a couple of those before, brilliant!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 11:59, Reply)
I love goths nearly as much as I love mongs.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:03, Reply)
I used to run a cybergoth night in Liverpool
Those videos bring back some interesting memories!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:05, Reply)
there's a video of goths dancing to single ladies
it's lol
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:15, Reply)
If you liked it then you should have put a ring through it.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:16, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:18, Reply)
My mate did a mashup of that with an Ultraviolence song
Sony made him take it down off YouTube :(
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:18, Reply)
How pathetic is that?
I had a blog closed down for using a Sony related artist in a mix - worst part was it was a shit song by a shit band and I only did it for fun.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:23, Reply)
I know, Sony are cunts
And the mashup was much better than the original!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:26, Reply)

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