Long thread is long
lunchtime.

what are you having?

mine is chicken balti soup, with marmite sandwich and a muller crunch corner

alt: ordered wedding rings yesterday, unexpectedly spent 10 times the intended amount on mine. What was the last expensive thing you accidentally bought?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:04, 210 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Leftovers for me today
Sausage, leek and apple plait with braised red cabbage on the side.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:05, Reply)

that sounds lovely

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:06, Reply)

Yup, it's very nice.
It's a kind of giant sausage roll with puff pastry. The cabbage was cooked with apple and red wine.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:07, Reply)

nice

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I got one that cooks, Vippers.
This is not something that I have regretted thus far; my own cooking skills are non-existent.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:10, Reply)

while I like to cook and do most of it
my mrs is rather good too. She made chicken katsu curry followed by lemon and lime souffle/spongy things on saturday. both were sensational.

I'm lucky really, my friend Stacey cooks amazingly well. She made us lobster bisque on Friday night.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:12, Reply)

If I end up moving West
I shall be inviting myself round to your and your mates' houses and not leaving until I get food. Fact.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:14, Reply)

I have a large amount of exceedingly tasty chicken stock
What should I make with it? I'm thinking risotto and soup but what?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:15, Reply)

I don't blame you.
we eat very well.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:16, Reply)

I don't know or care
I'll just shovel some dissapointing food in my mouth at my desk while working.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:06, Reply)

that's the spirit

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:07, Reply)

I spent £150 on ties yesterday. I wasn't really expecting that.
and I bought a car on Saturday. But that wasn't entirely unexpected.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:07, Reply)

if you bought fewer than about 10 ties I will have to call your judgement into question
in fact, I will do that anyway. Why did you buy ties?

and what car?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:08, Reply)

You can't get many decent ties for less that £20 now.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:09, Reply)

I bought a tie on saturday actually
and now that I think about it, you are right. Also, as with most things like that, most of the ones available are fucking horrible.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:14, Reply)

Fewer.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:09, Reply)

fuck
momentary lapse
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:12, Reply)

5 ties.
one for me, the others for ushers and best men.

And a Saab.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:09, Reply)

Fucking hell
£30 a tie to wear once?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Well, no, I chose them to be fairly suitable for wearing "generally"
and why is that any more stupid than £60 each to hire a penguin suit that not only will you only wear once, you don't even get to keep?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:12, Reply)

This is true I suppose
Got a mate who runs a wedding shop so mates rates for our suits
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:13, Reply)

sounds sensible
I bought an ex hire suit for the cost of hiring one, and am going to be able to get it tailored to fit nicely. I've instructed my best man to wear a black suit. Everyone else can wear what they want
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:13, Reply)

I'm just getting one of my decent suits tailored.
No desire to look like a grey penguin. I did that last time. Told the boys to all wear suits of roughly the same colour and that'll work for me.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:15, Reply)

I have the urge to dress like a victorian gent for mine
not sure why.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:17, Reply)

Just as long as you crack one off over the scullery maid
that's fine by me.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:17, Reply)

naturally

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

I've recently become more sartorially aware
and, as with most things, I immediately jump from learning how to do something properly to being incredibly snobbish abut those that don't.

As a result, should I marry, myself and my best man will be in grey morning suits with four-in-hand ties and the rest shall be in normal suits. There shall be no tails or Ascots present and I shall sneer at those who suggest it.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

morning suits often have tails. Unless you mean frock coats.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:26, Reply)

I was actually thinking of a stroller at the time I posted, for some reason.
But I did mean a morning suit.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

Leftover roast chicken
in a wholemeal wrap with lime pickle. 100% nicer than expected

Alt:
Fender strat - only intended to go and look
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:09, Reply)

sounds good
what sort of strat? I've got an American HSS.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:15, Reply)

Its all ash
with Seymour Duncan pickups. Mexican I think
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:16, Reply)

nice
might stick a seymour duncan humbucker in mine at some point.

the most important thing about it is that it is metallic gold with a black scratchplate
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:17, Reply)

All single coils in mine
Nice sound though and a good price too.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

it's nice to have a humbucker
gives it some balls for solos and stuff. Also, makes pinched harmonics easier to sound
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

I've not got a single humbucker in any of my guitars
I feel this should be addressed
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

my ibanez has a couple
they are pretty much essential for rock music
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

I have an old Ibanez Roadster
that is beat to shit. Bought it at a house clearance auction for £30 years ago. I may frankenguitar it
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

may as well if it was that cheap
I need to get my electric 12 string out, it's been sadly neglected since I got it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

I may trawl ebay soon

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:27, Reply)

I had lots of baked goods for breakfast
So just having tea at the mo.

Alt: holiday to France, lots of meals out.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Coffee for lunch.
Can't be bothered going to get anything.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:14, Reply)

lazy
so how come you are on the internet again at the moment?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:15, Reply)

At Mel's parent's,
Waiting for the Sky man to come.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:16, Reply)

ah, exciting stuff

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

Really is...
Back to work on Wednesday though, can't fucking wait, been off for nearly a month!
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

I could do with a break
haven't had any time off since new years

how are things going with the job? still all good?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

Yeah, job's still good,
But I'm in the middle of sorting out replacement animals for stuff that's been squished or whatever.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

has much been squished?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

Couple of 'roaches,
A millipede, and some old guy ate a snail.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:26, Reply)

I'm not sure I want to ask...

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:27, Reply)

It's exactly what it sounds like.
An old guy ate one of my giant snails.
That bastard.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:29, Reply)

what drove him to it?
belligerence? hunger?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Alzheimer's.

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

he'd forgotten that it is uncouth to eat someone else's giant snail?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:33, Reply)

Exactly.

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Where the hell do you work? A french petting zoo?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

Something like that.

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:35, Reply)

And looking up info about a kinda toad.
Don't fuckin' ask.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

Are her parents dying?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

Nope, working.
As far as I'm aware...
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

It's funny because Sky man could be interpreted as a primitive way to refer to God
and you live in a backwards part of the world.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

Ah...
Sorry, far too advanced for my simple mind to grasp.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:21, Reply)

I'm very witty.
You seem to have forgotten.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

Of course.
Total memory lapse.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

Did mel get that job she applied for aaages ago?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:27, Reply)

Nah, but cheers for the help.

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

Ahh shame.
She would probably be getting made redundant now anyway, fucking Clegg and his croneys.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:33, Reply)

Hello, yes?

( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:36, Reply)

True.
You at risk of getting the kick?
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:36, Reply)

Nah, I've gone through consultation but that just meant I'm moving over to finance.
Three year pay freeze and buttfuck to my pension though.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Tough break man,
Damn.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:39, Reply)

It's a pain in the arse personally
but it's really not that bad at all, compared to a lot of other people.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:42, Reply)

Fuck off bert

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

Hey, I didn't fuck my sister.

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

We all have regrets in our lives

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:21, Reply)

Nah, unlike him,
My sister's not my type. Too many genetic links.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:22, Reply)

Holy shitfuck
Look who dragged his arse online. Alright?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:21, Reply)

Yeah, OK thanks.
How's stuff with you?
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Same shit, different day
Booked flights to Japan, then it killed itself. This is why I'm not allowed pets.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

Sooo...
You should totally invite yourself to Paris.
( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:34, Reply)

I wish she'd kill herself
Vacuous whore.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Do it!

( Cawl, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Moroccan cous cous and chicken and an apple.
I bought a bag off Ebay for £120. Granted it would have sold in the shops for £189 and granted I was looking at another bag for over £200.
( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:17, Reply)

So the fake bag from e-bay is seventy quid cheaper than the real one in the shop?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

It's not fake.
It's second hand.
( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:37, Reply)

Good a food thread, now i can ask this
I have left over roast beef and i want to make some sort of sticky beef oriental stir fry/noodle/rice jobby - any thoughts?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

the jobby is what it will turn into after you eat it, no?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:18, Reply)

Shove it in a pan on a low heat
Honey, soy, chilli and red wine vinegar, let it cook down and NOM
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

Perfect, i already have these ingredients!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

By the time you have cooked some rice
all will be perfect

EDIT :

Some sesame seeds on might be good too
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:21, Reply)

also, sprinkle with some toasted sesame seeds

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:22, Reply)

Ahh!
Mindpiss
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:22, Reply)

Good idea, dinner is now planned!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

I recommend a bit of kaeng phet with leftover beef
make or buy some red curry paste, dry fry that with thin slices of the beef, chuck in some water, a sliced lemongrass stalk and some kaffir lime leaves, simmer it for an hour or so then add fish sauce, sliced red pepper and creamed coconut, cook for another 30 mins. Job done.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

This sounds good
I fancy making that Vietnamese dish where you make a spicy broth and float in raw beef and the residual heat just cooks it. Looks lovely
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:26, Reply)

It's fucking lovely.
Normally I wouldn't piss on shop-bought thai curry paste if it is on fire, but this works well with shop-bought red paste. Mind you, I'll only use my own home-made green paste, but then I am a terrible gastrosnob.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

Join the club!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:30, Reply)

I already have red curry in my repertoire, looking for something new today
but thanks for the advice
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

either a falafel and houmous toasted sandwich on lebanese flatbread
or a burrito. i have gossip to report from OMG REAL LIFE events, so my nosy colleague is dragging me out for lunch.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

Two toasted bigals, real ones, one with smoked salmon and creme cheese'n'chives, the other with chopped liver.
Anyone else reckon this is a bit sick? ... www.capitalfm.com/artists/katy-perry/news/signs-tsunami-song/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:19, Reply)

toasted beagles?
how cruel
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:21, Reply)

Better than raw ones
sushibeagle
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:22, Reply)

Bye-Gul, not Bay-Gal... stupid Americanisms.
/ac
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

bagel ;-)
I love bagels, especially proper ones. I am envious.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Well nice, were still warm when I ripped them from the mount of them, really fresh.
I also have some of Missy Eliot's favoite bread too "CHOLLAH"
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

Liver?
*boik*
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Chilli and a jacket potato
Alt: Father Ted on DVD. Love the series, but there's no way in Hell I should have spent £40 on it.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

£40? I'm sure I got mine a hell of a lot cheaper than that.

( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Aye, this was a few years ago

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:28, Reply)

I don't believe it Ted!
That's what he says.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:29, Reply)

I'm having a sausage sandwich for breakfast.
alt: Moet
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:22, Reply)

An apple and a low fat yoghurt
Alt: 6 G&Ts at the weekend, at the princely sum of £4.75 each... I was so stunned after being told the price of the first that I had to buy five more to get over it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:23, Reply)

we went to the savoy on fri night
the cocktails are about £15-£20 each. my american flatmate got there late, only had one, and so paid separately to the rest of us pissheads. she was waiting for change from a tenner. when the maitre'd pointed out gently but firmly that he needed another tenner, she said loudly in her NY accent:

"holy shit, it should have come with an orgasm for that."
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

Were they worth the money though?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:29, Reply)

oh my god yes
i don't have a problem with the price, if you don't want to pay that, don't go to the savoy, easy. we chose it because we fancied being fancy for an evening! besides, any decent cocktail bar in london will be £10 upwards for a cocktail, so considering where we were, i don't think it's too bad.

but i had to disagree with the flatmate, i think my mouth did have several orgasms when drinking those cocktails. esp the ones with whipped eggwhite (cloverclub and new orleans gin fizz, sounds vile, tastes UNBELIEVABLE).
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Lies
Oxo Tower is riding high at just about £8 for the best Martini in London.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:43, Reply)

I think I would like to take all of swipe's friends up the oxo tower for a dry martini.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:48, Reply)

The oxo tower sounds like a euphamism

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:49, Reply)

i fucking love this!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:49, Reply)

not reeeeeally a fan of the oxo
the food is pretentious, tiny-portioned shite!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:50, Reply)

We're talking about drinking though!
The brasserie is much better value for money IMO.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:39, Reply)

agreeing with your flat mate here
it seems the only reason to drink a drink at that price is to brag about it, and really, are you going to feel anything other than regret after 3 of those cocktails?
you could probably buy the ingrediants for the price of three and be able to make twenty of them.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:47, Reply)

it's not for everyone and it's not for everyday
we went as a group of girls for a treat, and it was lovely.

i wouldn't do it every night though!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:49, Reply)

That's not the point though, is it K?
It's the place, the music, the atmosphere and everything else that goes with it.

To be fair, I don't think twenty-quid sounds excessive for drinks at the Savoy.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:51, Reply)

If I had that kind of brass
I'd happily do it. Sounds like fun.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:53, Reply)

I wouldn't know, would I?
I'm a country girl, the fanciest thing in my town is Houlihans.
Just because a place has fancy music and smug twats floating around, means the girl should be judged because she didn't know the price of a drink?
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:55, Reply)

I don't think anybody's judging anybody else for it, Kristine =/

( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:58, Reply)

Well I can easily spent £150 on a night out on the turps.
Granted, that'll include a couple of cab fares, but it'll mostly go on drink, yes, you get a lot more drink for your money elsewhere, but if you're having fantastic drinks made, using the best spirits then the chances are you aren't out to get spannered, instead you'll enjoy the evening and actually remember it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:59, Reply)

I could spend a fair bit on a night out as well, I'm just saying that her post reads as "she didn't realise how much it was"
then "you shouldn't go if you don't want to pay the price!"

it seems a bit twattish to me
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:09, Reply)

I don't think anyone would be in any doubt that the Savoy is going to be expensive.
They've recently spent £220-million refurbishing the place, and they won't recoup that out-lay with 'happy hour'.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:13, Reply)

as I said, "I wouldn't know, would I?"
I don't know what the fuck the Savoy is. Pardon me for not coming equipt with that knowledge, perhaps her flatmate is just as stupid as I am, considering we're both American.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:20, Reply)

the savoy is a type of cabbage
I don't quite understand how they could have spent millions refurbishing a type of cabbage, but then I'm not an agronomist.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:22, Reply)

They could turn it into a Gem.
Lettuce pray.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:23, Reply)

You seem to be getting wound up on the internet, here.

( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I could say that I'm not and try to explain further, but what's the point

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:36, Reply)

the sad thing is that I'd be considered as the one with wrong priorities
for thinking that spunking £150 on a night on the sauce is a complete waste. Fine if you are having a particularly great meal as well, but otherwise...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:12, Reply)

You're right though. It is a complete waste.
£150.00 could be spent on so many other things more worthwhile than a hangover, but occasionally, it happens. A night in the local costs nothing like that.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:15, Reply)

How comes you never invite me out for cocktails?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:30, Reply)

i love you
but you're not a girl. and it was kind of a girls' evening.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

=(

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:47, Reply)

Are they served in a bucket?
They should be for £20
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:31, Reply)

they are served in the savoy, silly
and OMG the pianist in the american bar was fine.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

just a cheese and beef salad sandwich
but it is on tiger bread.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:24, Reply)

WINNAR
Tiger bread
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:26, Reply)

Baked in the ovens of Charlie Sheen's Warlock mansion

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:29, Reply)

Parmo for lunch
A northern delicacy of deep fried cholesterol with added cheese. Usually served with chips
(CheatingRabbit, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

I've not had one of these as yet
Boro's finest as I understand
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:36, Reply)

Actually the most disgusting things to exist ever.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:36, Reply)

possibly
But so nice
(CheatingRabbit, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:51, Reply)

I've just eaten a giant paella for two from M&S
It's supposed to be for my mum and brother for dinner later, but they're out and I'll be back in Newcastle before they return home. I phoned my brother and he doesn't want it, so I reckon having 50% of support on this matter justifies my actions.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Hmmm
My stock could be put to paella making *ponders*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:37, Reply)

It was amazing.
Although I should have weaned myself off of normal food by now to ease the transition of having to eat baked beans out of a tin three times a day from tomorrow onwards.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:39, Reply)

I'd say go cold turkey
but that is normal food
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:40, Reply)

haha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:40, Reply)

Aw man, you're stealing from your own family now?
When will it end?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:39, Reply)

Me being face down in a ditch off the M1 after eating the last slice of margarita from a local mobster's plate in Pizza Hut.
Probably.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:53, Reply)

You'll have been 'topped'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:54, Reply)

With a stuffed crust.

( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 12:59, Reply)

Margarita is a drink
Margherita is a pizza.

"The More You Know"
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:14, Reply)

You're just trying to keep the Status Quo happy.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:18, Reply)

Feeling lazy. Just went to the veggie chinese place up the road
After nomming it I popped to the pub for a quiet one. There was an instant flicker of recognition as the barman served me, and both of us then looked down, feeling awkward as we tried to remember how the fuck we knew each other. It nagged away at me for the next fifteen minutes with no joy. Then the pub stereo, which was completely divorced from the big screen showing 4music (why? Why show a music channel if you're going to keep it on mute and pump other tunes into the pub?) committed the cardinal sin of playing Oasis and I resolved never to set foot in the pub again. Problem solved.

Just so you know, any replies along the lines of "maybe you didn't recognise him with his trousers on" or suchlike will be met with an automatic 0/10.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:00, Reply)

Is he not just the barman?
And thus you know his face by going to the bar?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:01, Reply)

That's just it, the bar recently changed ownership, so I've never seen him in there before
The old owners never would have allowed fucking Wonderwall on their premises
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:04, Reply)

Don't get stressed about the music policy changing,
You gotta roll with it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:05, Reply)

JeffTheDogFucker Was last asked to leave the Internet
now
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:05, Reply)

It's all part of my Masterplan.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:07, Reply)

*groan*
Genuine officelol there, though I'm ashamed to admit it

/slides away
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:07, Reply)

There is no excuse for citing Oasis songs
Ever. Don't let the door of the internet hit you on the arse on the way out
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:10, Reply)

What is it with you and the hitting of arses?
2/10?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:10, Reply)

Spot on, sunshine
I'm afraid I must demand that your lot give Norwich a shoeing tonight by way of penance
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:12, Reply)

I hope they manage it too.
Not because I can't about Swansea or Florist, or any other side, but another couple of wins and I think they'll completely avoid getting dragged back into the relegation battle.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:17, Reply)

You've got no worries there mate
Preston are as good as down, I can see United mounting a comeback but it'll probably be too little too late, and it's hard to see Scunny pulling themselves clear either. Personally I'm keeping everything crossed for the filth to get dragged down
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:21, Reply)

Grant Holt usually scores when he played City, so I can see them losing this evening.
Preston are fucked, and Scunthorpe were probably the worst team I've seen this season, so they will probably take two of the spots, but I just hope City can finish strongly as it'll help with the summer recruitment process.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I thought you meant at your work then
I clearly need more coffee
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Wonderwall Star Wars related benders
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:05, Reply)

.....and you normally only see
a. His cock through the glory hole
b. His ears from pummeling him from behind
c. The top of his head bobbing away
d. All of the above
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:04, Reply)

0/10
I am hereby rescinding the 9/10 you got earlier today
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:06, Reply)

Can't!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:06, Reply)

They're my marks and my rules
Can
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:09, Reply)

*hides 9/10*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:09, Reply)

*activates 9/10 homing beacon I cunningly built into my keyring*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:13, Reply)

ing o keyring electric sex dungeon
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:14, Reply)

Fucking, fucking hell
*grudgingly hands back 9/10*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Double woop!
That actually made me lol whilst typing it
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Yes, you've done very well indeed today
Now fuck the fuck off, you fucking fuck
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:21, Reply)

*fucks off happy with 2 9/10s*
I must get a 10 though
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:22, Reply)

I'm guarding the 10 closely
I don't want to end up like Len Goodman and totally devalue it, do I. And I'm sure you don't want your name to be associated with the likes of Mark Ramprakash. The memory of his Jive still boils my blood
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:24, Reply)

jive cock
boils makes
blood anus go tingly at the thought of an outrageously good bumming
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:31, Reply)

8/10, a well-deserved click
Bonus points for imagination attributed to the final point, and on a debut effort, too.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:33, Reply)

Darth, you know how a centipeed has 100 legs, does a millipeed really have a million? Who's task was it to count them; what if they found an abnormal one with 999,999 ? Like it fell off or something, or they lost count, wouldn't that really be annoying?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I can tell you with absolute certainty that there is no recorded instance of a centipede with exactly 100 legs
And on a recent visit to Longleat Ms Foxtrot bravely conquered her fear of all things creepy AND crawly to hold a giant African millipede. She said it felt like a mobile hairbrush. This has nowt to do with the number of legs it has, I just thought you might enjoy the story
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:32, Reply)

Someone on /talk said they have up to 750 legs, but 'milli' means a thousand in latin.
It makes me question the scientific acreacy of the naming conventions of animals; it's like they've gotten up to 350 and thought "Fuck it, nearly half way there, let's call it 750 and round it up".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:39, Reply)

I think they just went
"Hey, that thing's got lots of legs. What means 'lots'? Cent, that'll do."

And then they needed something that meant 'more lots than lots', and so millipede.
( Kroney, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:41, Reply)

They must have discovered the centipeed first then 'cus otherwise they would find the milipeed and think "Fuck me, that's got a lot of legs...
... let's call it the [lots]apede" and then found what we call the centipede and wouldn't have a name for it as the [lots]apede is already taken.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:44, Reply)

The thing is, those things are fucking ICKY
I wouldn't want to hold one still and count its legs. Would you? WOULD YOU?!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:42, Reply)

I guess if it was my job, like Berk, I'd have too.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:45, Reply)

Oh is that what she does?
Quick, let's gaz-bomb her until she finds out the answer to your question
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Scientist, isn't she?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:56, Reply)

oh my, please forgive the massive delay on this I have been quite busy
WEDDING RINGS!? OH MY GOD WHO GOT ENGAGED?!?!?!!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:29, Reply)

dunno
I was just speculating
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:30, Reply)

no you were being a smug cunt about the fact you can piss away £300 on a ring that looks exactly the same as the £30 one

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:32, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:33, Reply)

You really are objectionable
You'd been pleasant recently. Didn't think it would last long.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:37, Reply)

You love it when she's mean.

( girlinthehole, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:43, Reply)

I'm ambivalent to it.
it's fine when it's funny, even when it is aimed at me.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:45, Reply)

Vipros, why do people keep horses these days? I mean, like, on farms and stuff, the ones they don't ride or race.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:42, Reply)

do people keep them for things other than riding?
I guess the odd person must use them for pulling a cart or whatever.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:43, Reply)

That's what I mean, there are loads of horses in fields around my way that don't seem to be used for anything appart from just being horses in fields.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:46, Reply)

they probably do get ridden
you'd have to be pretty shit farmer these days not to have a tractor to do the work of a horse.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Mar 2011, 13:47, Reply)