Sorry for blaming Mike woz ere for Joey Dekion's lovely penises.
I'm starting a new thread seeing as no-one else has and that last one's gone shit.

Losing things.

When I was a semi-professional DJ I used to lose on average one mobile phone a month. Then a year ago I lost three £50 wallets in the space of four months.

Do you lose things a lot? What's the worst? References to virginity will be met with a disappointed sigh. Also, any replies referring to 'loosing' things will be met with ARSON.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:41, 126 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I got drunk & lost my glasses last week
they were only a few months old, cost £250, and had been bought to replace another pair that I lost when drunk.

This getting drunk is an expensive business.

Other than that I don't lose stuff much. Other than braincells.
( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Also, I didn't lose stuff when dj'ing but I was forever yanking headphone cables out of their sockets
Shit needs a re-design, yo
( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:47, Reply)

My piece de resistance was the classic
'take the record that is still playing off the deck', man, I was so fucking good.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:49, Reply)

Yup
also getting into a track whilst chemically enlightened and completely forgetting that, y'know, you're meant to play another one afterwards.
( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Ah yes, another of my 'techniques'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:51, Reply)

*professional dj FIVES*

( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:52, Reply)

"professional"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

*misses*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:58, Reply)

I did that.
I was walking home drunk through the park and tripped over, they went flying. I was reduced to wearing out of date disposable contact lenses. I wouldn't recommened it.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:48, Reply)

I'm using an old pair of glasses that are a different prescription to what I have now
if I fall hands first into the chest of a lady, that's my excuse
( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:52, Reply)

God damn, I wish I'd thought of that.
Instead I'm not allowed within 100 yards of that Swimming Pool anymore.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:03, Reply)

u leik ur arson black cok

(PsychoChomp, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:45, Reply)

So what? Are you homophobic or something?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:47, Reply)

I dont' lose anything important
UPS lost my phone for me, though. That was nice. I got a replacement, but it's a different model and I think I've decided that I don't like it.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Cool story Kro

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:47, Reply)

I'm actually pretty good with keeping hold of my wallet, keys, phone, etc
I've never lost any of them.

When I was a child, I used to drive my Dad up the wall by managing to lose one shoe in the morning. Never both, only ever one. When you're trying to get 6 kids out of the door, and the youngest can't find his shoes, it seems that this is quite irritating.

I lost a jacket and mp3 player when I was 18, after having my drink spiked and having to be carried out of the club, my friend picked up the wrong jacket for me. Ugh, that was a quite expensive mistake.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Your drink got spiked?
Did you wake up in the morning feeling physically uncomfortable and with a vague feeling of violation?
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:48, Reply)

BEST NIGHT EVAR

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:54, Reply)

In a club known quite well for spiking, I was drinking pints, walked off from my friends, put down my pint on a random table, came back, picked it back up again, and went back to them.
And nope, I just felt ill, and in a lot of pain, from where I'd fallen over.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:09, Reply)

My littlest sister had this same tantrum everyday.
And the missing shoe was nearly always under the sofa.
(DeeDee, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:54, Reply)

I was never that fussed
My Dad would go mental.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

Does losing your temper count?
Cockheads inability to see a A4 sheet of paper with "Please do not use, unit being defragmented" taped to a monitor are seriously pissing me off. And it's not dinner time yet.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:47, Reply)

Can you not remotely lock the keyboard/mouse?
Do you just use RDC?
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Unplug them - job done

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Or that.

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Unfortunately, I'm working in a net cafe, which services window lickers and alkies.
They just hit the machine if it doesn't immediately connect them to Youtube, or Facebook.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:55, Reply)

I managed to lose my Leeds festival ticket once, somewhere in the house
On return from the V festival I had one evening in the house to sort going and I scoured the fucking place from top to bottom. Gone. Vanished. Never to be seen again. Cunt

I had to buy one on the door - expensive week.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:50, Reply)

I had to replace 8 'lost' Motorhead tickets at £30 once.
I still have them.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

ouch

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:54, Reply)

An ex 'tidied them away' aka 'stuffed them into a random cupboard and then denied all knowledge'.
Found them about a year after the gig.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Mrs Cow is the daddy at doing this
I've taken to taking the piss out of her when she tries to find things, saying helpful things like "have you looked in the fridge" when she can't find either pair of glasses - again.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:00, Reply)

You've probably already got it
but I have an mp3 of the full acoustic version of Ace of Spades as played on the Kronenbourg advert if you're interested.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:54, Reply)

I don't and would like that a lot, thanks.


Errr, I mean, errr, sorry: you're on ignore because I hate you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:56, Reply)

Me me me me me me!!
Please!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:58, Reply)

Calm down 'Desperate Dan'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:02, Reply)

I'll put it on my phone and send it to yours at the ba$h

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:04, Reply)

Excellent. Ta.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:07, Reply)

*cowpies*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

I also please.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:06, Reply)

No you fucking don't.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:07, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

Are you ba$hing?

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:09, Reply)

'No, I'm just pleased to see you'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:12, Reply)

Grim

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:14, Reply)

I lost tickets to the League 2 Play-Off Final In Cardiff
The year Southend beat Lincoln.

I ended up having to take a day off work, get down to the Southend Ticket office the last day they were on sale and buy two more. I ended up having to sit in shitty seats near the back instead of my original ones behind the goal.

In the pub after the game, I found my original tickets in the zip up pocket inside my bag that I never use and must have put them to stay safe.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Could you not have sat in your original seats
given that either nobody else would be doing so or if someone had nicked them, they would be.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I can't say I ever memorise my block, row and seat number when I get a ticket for anything.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:26, Reply)

Me neither - I'm such an idiot like that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:29, Reply)

That was your first mistake

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:33, Reply)

"...instead of my original ones behind the goal."
In this instance it would appear that Scarpe had.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Not wishing to nit pick...
but just because he knew they were 'behind the goal' didn't necessarily mean that he had the block, row, and seat number memorised.

I'm assuming that he was referring to the Millenium Stadium, which is a bloody big venue.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Yup, right on all counts.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:52, Reply)

This does not happen often.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:01, Reply)

I wouldn't have known exactly which ones they were even if I had thought of that.
Which I didn't. As I'm stupid.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:52, Reply)

I currently appear to be losing the sight in my right eye. I'm probably going to have to go to the opticians.
It's a bit disappointing as up until I noticed this, I was the only person in my family with perfect eyesight.

I'm probably going to have to wear glasses/contacts like some sort of genetic weakling now.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

It's all that wanking over those cocks.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Go for the ROBO-EYE upgrade
Laser surgery FTW
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Eyeborg
eyeborgblog.com/ rather than www.imdb.com/title/tt1043844/
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:11, Reply)

Eye patch dude, it's the only way.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Eye patch suicide
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:28, Reply)

I'm always losing umbrellas,
must've spent £50 on them so far this year
(DeeDee, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:55, Reply)

...buy cheaper umbrellas then?

(berk, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:38, Reply)

I should do really,
but when I'm on my way to work the only shop I pass that sells them is the boots in the train station, for about a tenner!
(DeeDee, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:03, Reply)

I lost an iPod which my wife bought me
Bear in mind that this is in China where a computer programmer (as she is) earns about 250 quid a month.

FUCK.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Get a Chinese knock-off replacement.
Cost: 50p

SORTED.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:56, Reply)

Have you heard of the knock-off Apple stores?
http://birdabroad.wordpress.com/2011/07/20/are-you-listening-steve-jobs/
(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:59, Reply)

Yup. Impressive attention to detail I thought.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:03, Reply)

Apple shit is amazingly popular here considering the cost
There was a story about a boy who sold a kidney for an iPad.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

I remember seeing the first Macdonalds opening in Beijing on Blue Peter.
At the time a Big Mac Meal cost a month's wages - there were queues round the block.

Stupid cunts.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:10, Reply)

I suppose that crappy burgers were preferable to the shit they normally eat.
Even though Macdonalds ARE the spunk of the devil.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:15, Reply)

(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:17, Reply)

That reminds me, I need to get some new tyres.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:18, Reply)

And to pick those rubber bands up

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:19, Reply)

And to buy my daughter some Playmobil.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:20, Reply)

That is fucking horrible.
It doesn't even look real.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:19, Reply)

(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:21, Reply)

This image can probably be seen from China.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Really, kids here are helpless confronted with fast food
They're the first generation to have it, and it's seen as up-market and aspirational; also, they have to study like you wouldn't believe with no time for playing or sports. Result: LOADS OF FAT KIDS.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:29, Reply)

Poor sods.
(please make this image smaller, thanks)
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:33, Reply)

better?
HTML skillz not wasted.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Actually, much, thanks

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Haha, racism.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:25, Reply)

Racism is big, hard AND cool

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:47, Reply)

Mrs Cow lost two fucking iPods that I gave her, including one I won which had my name engraved on it!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 10:58, Reply)

Give her a slap round the tits - see if she loses that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:04, Reply)

Sounds like a good plan anyway

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Seem to have had a spate of it lately
I lost my MTFU Badge, and my phone headset, neither major but both annoying. Oh and I lost my bicycle pump, which is odd but no big deal.

/dull answer but at least no loosings, are you proud of me Monty?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:02, Reply)

Immensely.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:04, Reply)

*prouds*
*proffers nommy cayke*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

Earlier this 'summer' I stupidly left my car window down for about an hour while parked on my driveway.
It was quite warm and my street is pretty quiet, so it seemed like no big deal.

When I was driving later that night, I noticed that my iPod and connector were missing, along with a handful of loose change from near the gear stick. What a tool.

A full week later I discovered my iPod in my rucksack that I take to the gym. A week after that I discovered the connector cable bundled up in the ashtray - something that I never do and everyone else has denied doing.

After all that, all I appear to have lost is about 30 pence in 2s and 1s. I will not be leaving my car windows down again any time in the near future.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:02, Reply)

SPOOOKY

(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:06, Reply)

I have an extremely expensive stereo
and an even more expensive Cisco switch sitting in my car, in Uxbridge, right now.

I'm not worried.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

Morning Rachel.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:11, Reply)

Haha
It's a crocodile skin and diamond encrusted Cisco switch by Louise Vuitton
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:11, Reply)

In pink, obviously

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:14, Reply)

How much did it cost though?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:15, Reply)

When I was married I always looked after all the important documents - passports, insurance policies etc
The filing system was not terribly well organised, but I could always manage to lay my hands on something if I needed it in a hurry.

When me and the ex decided to split up, I handed over her passport and driving licence. These were now her responsibility.

She lost them within a month.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:08, Reply)

seemtohavemisplacedmyspacekey

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:12, Reply)

I falsely accused you of penising and sincerely apologise.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:13, Reply)

afewmorepeopleignoringmedoesn'tadduptomuch

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:16, Reply)

Having moved stuff from old place to new
I appear to have mislaid a slotted spoon and a wooden spatula. It's really annoying as it's only a small flat and I'm almost certain they were there the first week I moved in.

I shall probably find them again just as I move out.

Some evenings I misplace a couple of bottles of wine, it's a complete mystery where they go.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Have a look in those Amazon storage boxes you wouldn't fucking shut up about.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:23, Reply)

One post, you obsessed stalker
they might have been stolen by a peripheral member of an obscure band from the last 40 years, so if you could ask everyone you know that should cover that angle.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:42, Reply)

One day it's boxes, the next day it's envelopes
There's a definite pattern to your postings LIC, if only I could put my finger on what that is ...
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:48, Reply)

Checked your post yet?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:21, Reply)

How do you misplace a couple of bottles of wine?
They seem like something that would be hard to lose due to their size. Do you have Alzheimers?
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:25, Reply)

I wish he did.
Then hopefully he'd forget his password for B3ta.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:26, Reply)

Not really, Lighty!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:27, Reply)

OK, really. I lied.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:27, Reply)

I'm sure you're looking forward to no longer reading my posts
when they fling you in debtors prison.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:39, Reply)

It's the one positive I can see in the whole affair.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:41, Reply)

I don't tend to lose things much, but my wife lost her handbag whilst on holiday this year
Due to a combination of heat and large measures she managed to get absolutely spackered after two drinks at a local bar that was about ten minutes staggering distance from our hotel. We left as soon as I noticed how far gone she was but it took a while longer this time what with propping up the swaying loontard that my wife had transformed into.

On making it back to the hotel complex the discovery was made. No bag. Meaning no room keys, euros, credit cards, driving licence etc. So I jettison the baggage and race back to the bar, checking in every place we'd been that evening before returning to the hotel defeated.

It was then I remembered she had paid a visit to the little lush room in reception on our way back. I managed to rope a female guest into going in to check for it for me. After a couple of seconds she returned holding the bag and I dropped to one knee and proposed to her such was my relief.

The only other time I've seen her that drunk before was after a whole hell of a lot more than two drinks. I'd had the same and I was fine.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:28, Reply)

If indeed she was drunk

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Just admit it, you spiked her drink.
This is the only way that a married man can have sex.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:35, Reply)

If not for our kids being in close proximity for the majority of the holiday..
..we would've been at it like rabbits. It's amazing what shedding all the home/work stress can do for your sex life.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:40, Reply)

+ milkman
Soz
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:54, Reply)

*checks reality*

Hmm, nope, not in a Robin Askwith movie

*sigh of relief*
...
..
.
*hears faint slidewhistle in the distance*
*spinning top keeps spinning*

/inceptionsofamilkman
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:42, Reply)

I don't lose things
I temporarily mislay them. Because I have such a small flat (even smaller now) I can usually say with utmost certainty where anything is at a given time, and it drives me completely bonkers if I go to get something and it isn't where I thought it was. I will then have to find it. Doesn't matter if it's 3am, or if I should be leaving for work, or have somewhere to be - nothing. I cannot rest until I have found what it was I was looking for.

Yes, I do realise that this makes me sound mental.
(berk, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:35, Reply)

You aren't Bono AICMFP

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:38, Reply)

+1

(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:39, Reply)

Have five internet pounds my good man
I'd rather be dead than be that cunt.
(berk, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:39, Reply)

*spends recklessly*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:39, Reply)

I lost a DVD of Happy Gilmore that my brother gave me
I hope I never find it.
( Peej, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:42, Reply)

Oh man, did I miss willies?
I miss all the fun. Somebody has to show me their willy, just to make up for my disappointment.

In our house, it's mr b3th who loses things. And by 'things', I mean 'every bastard thing he every has in his hands' (no innuendo intended).
Seriously, every ten minutes it's "b3th! Find my [insert name of random item]!"
Said item is usually either under a piece of paper, or right out in the open, but just out of his direct line of sight. Drives me fucking insane.

Also, my marbles.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:46, Reply)

*gaz's a pic of my willy*

(McChinaman banned, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:47, Reply)

Going the opera this weekend, Craig?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:57, Reply)

Ooh, is that Mr. Colclough?
I broke my wrist recently, perhaps he can totally fuck it up for me before taking me out on his Fighter Plane to the North Pole.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:09, Reply)

I'm off for my lunch.
I have very sore guts so I'm only having soup. Woe is me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:11, Reply)

You should ask to see Gonz's willy, rumour has it that it is enormous

( broadsword, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 13:51, Reply)

I'm always losing tools for my bike.
It's always the little fiddly allen key type bits that I need, and I know where I put them, but then someone messes with my filing system (the drawer under the sink) and they are lost forever. Until I buy a new bit and then I immediately find the one that I had lost in the first place.

Alternative answers:

'My religion'
'The will to live'
'I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing'
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:52, Reply)

OI!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:58, Reply)

OIOI!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:59, Reply)

Kenneth Noye!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:00, Reply)

Saveloy!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:03, Reply)

pakchoi!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)

Hoi Polloi!
And all that. Alright, madame?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Not bad at all our kid. How's you?
I sent an email to your gmail last week. I think you're ignoring me.
Good weekend?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Did you?
I didn't get it lovely. Sorry about that.

Weekend was lovely, ta. How was yours?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:12, Reply)

It may have gone to spam as I didn't use my work email. It was hardly interesting.
My weekend was ok. Everything got cancelled except the baby visiting to meet Tigger, but we enjoyed the increased pyjama time, me and Tiggs.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:15, Reply)

I bet Tigger looked cute in his jim jams

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:18, Reply)

He still managed dapper as well!
Right, later potaters
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:18, Reply)

I've got a dedicated toolbox.

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:58, Reply)

Like I say, the drawer under the sink.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 11:59, Reply)

Nono, this is a proper tool storage solution
with drawers and lift out trays and secret bottoms and lasers and a water trap.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Lasers, you say?
What a good idea. I shall invest in some of these.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Lasers make everything better.
Except Alderan.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Fanny euphemismlolz
Or a 'euphemimsy', if you will.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Oh, I certainly will.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:04, Reply)

OIOI!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:04, Reply)

Sup!
Kudos on your impressive cycling and mountain climbing skillz!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:06, Reply)

Fanks!
How was Japan? Looked all of the awesome.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:07, Reply)

It was indeed every last bit of awesome
I'm now saving up to go back there, and enrolling in Japanese language classes next week.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Cor!
I really quite fancy it myself - meant to go on honeymoon but ran out of monies. One day. One day.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:10, Reply)

It isn't cheap, but worth every penny

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:11, Reply)

No, you've a mimsy

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)

Several, in fact, of varying shades and shapes
All stitched together in a patchwork quimquilt.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:07, Reply)

I lost my return ticket on a day trip to Calais. Paid £16
return to Calais from Charing Cross.

Whilst having a slap up feed of frog's legs and horsemeat I left the tickets (me and a pal) sur la table dans le restaurant.

Got back to the ferry terminal and the French cunts wanted £40 each to get back to Blighty despite me still having my passport and valid booking. Whilst remonstrating with the cunt behind the counter the French filth turned up with barkingvisciousdogs and threatened to jail me. I paid the £40.

Went back 6 weeks later on the same deal and lost the tickets again whilst pissed in a bar.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Next time I suggest you let your travelling companion look after the tickets.
Because you appear to be a fucking liability.
( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:02, Reply)

liability bender
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Yeah, my mate made me pay his £40 the second time.
Which is fare enough.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)

I nearly missed that dreadful pun
I'm calling Noel back so that he can leave because of you. Or summat.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:12, Reply)

I know, it's shit isn't it?
Bit more subtle than Noel though.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:15, Reply)

Tu est un imbecile, monsieur.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Etienne, le cretin

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)

But..but..I've got a booking. You can see that,
I can see my name on the screen. I have a fucking passport. WHY is it going to cost 400 Francs.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:13, Reply)

It's a Berk Tax.

( Kroney, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Well I wished they'd asked me to pay it when I booked.
Instead of when I was full of Kronenburg.

*shame*
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:15, Reply)

Kourtney & Khloe Take Umami

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:16, Reply)

Hey TTF! How's it going?
I was just thinking about you after that dreadful pun above.

Do one about bread and one about 70's sweets?

Go on!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:19, Reply)

Some Mother's Pride do have 'em

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:20, Reply)

Recycled from the other day.
I want a new one.

Go on. It's fucking brilliant!!!!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:22, Reply)

CaraMac & C.H.E.E.S.E.

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:22, Reply)

*squeals*
That's great!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:24, Reply)

The Mintstones

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Murray Mintstones would be better.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Ah yes! you're the one who falls asleep on the train a lot too.

( girlinthehole, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:22, Reply)

It has been known. :-)

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:25, Reply)

Limewatch UK

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:09, Reply)

....

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:19, Reply)

Be(sand)witched

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:24, Reply)

Recycled again.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:25, Reply)

I'm sorry, I can't remember them all

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:29, Reply)

I bet it's less fun without anyone else joining in.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:37, Reply)

I'm enjoying myself

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 13:04, Reply)

Also
this isn't really a lost thing, but my beautiful shiny Samsung Galaxy is at the doctor's being repaired, and I'm stuck using a phone which is, frankly, shit. I miss my little phone so much.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:19, Reply)

Get a good Phone then.
I can highly recommend the HTC Desire Z
Edit: Ignore me, mis-read the OP.
So how's tricks B3th?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:32, Reply)

turning nicely, thank you.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:43, Reply)

How much for bum fun?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:45, Reply)

more than you could afford, paddy

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:46, Reply)

I've got 21 pence here, I'm sure that's more than enough
Last I heard you were throwing in a suck off gratis
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:49, Reply)

I lose hairpins a lot.
I have to go out and buy a 100pk on average once every other month or so. And the will to live sometimes.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:44, Reply)

You can buy the will to live?
It comes in bottles, doesn't it.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:49, Reply)