Off Topic
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
I've just had a Rice Krispie cake
and earlier on I got custard in my moustache. I had to go and wipe it off with a napkin and everything. Internet fattie, right here.
Hahaha j/k I was really down the docks and a sailor spluffed on me. I can't afford the rent so I have to turn tricks in order to make ends meet. It's tragic, really.
So apparently Michaela Strachan murdered Ray Mears, or something. Who else is going to cop for it this year? My money's on Thatcher.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:29, 200 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
and earlier on I got custard in my moustache. I had to go and wipe it off with a napkin and everything. Internet fattie, right here.
Hahaha j/k I was really down the docks and a sailor spluffed on me. I can't afford the rent so I have to turn tricks in order to make ends meet. It's tragic, really.
So apparently Michaela Strachan murdered Ray Mears, or something. Who else is going to cop for it this year? My money's on Thatcher.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:29, 200 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I'm so bored shitless of seeing news link after news link
that I'd prefer almost anything over it.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)
that I'd prefer almost anything over it.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)
To be fair, it has been more than 24 hours since the last news link thread.
And that was posted by Bear Drunkie, not Chompy.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)
And that was posted by Bear Drunkie, not Chompy.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Yeah lets have another thread about FOOOOD for a fucking change eh?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)
I had some ham and mustard crisps.
i missed the good van because I was on a conference call.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:59, Reply)
i missed the good van because I was on a conference call.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:59, Reply)
Not a fan of mustard crisps
Klas Ohlsen (or whatever they are called) was giving away free sarnies at lunchtime
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Klas Ohlsen (or whatever they are called) was giving away free sarnies at lunchtime
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Is this whole thread merely a vehicle for Kroney to shoehorn in the information that he is still growing a beard?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)
He read somewhere online that chicks dig beards.
So he's putting it out there that he's growing a beard.
One of those attractive single, funny and smart female lurkers will see this and a seed of desire will grow.
it'll be hard at first for them to fall in love but he'll win her heart and move her into his passion palace in Slough.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)
So he's putting it out there that he's growing a beard.
One of those attractive single, funny and smart female lurkers will see this and a seed of desire will grow.
it'll be hard at first for them to fall in love but he'll win her heart and move her into his passion palace in Slough.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Has The Baroness improved your technique any, Chompy?
Last I heard, and I hear a lot, it was like an unloved engine. All banging pistons and fuck-all lubrication.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:57, Reply)
Last I heard, and I hear a lot, it was like an unloved engine. All banging pistons and fuck-all lubrication.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:57, Reply)
That kind of implies that there are funny, smart, attractive females on the internet
which we all know is LIES.
Assuming there *were* any birds on the internet (which there aren't) then they'd all be huge fat sweaty virgins.
Or huge fat sweaty slags.
You know, like on here.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:01, Reply)
which we all know is LIES.
Assuming there *were* any birds on the internet (which there aren't) then they'd all be huge fat sweaty virgins.
Or huge fat sweaty slags.
You know, like on here.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:01, Reply)
No, Chompy must be right
They are all obviously lurking and drooling over our posts.
The poor luststruck things.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:03, Reply)
They are all obviously lurking and drooling over our posts.
The poor luststruck things.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:03, Reply)
Actually, now I think about it, where ARE all the girls?
It's a little testosteroney in here today.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:11, Reply)
It's a little testosteroney in here today.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:11, Reply)
b3th I've put RachelSwipe on ignore for a reason.
If she's deliberatly logging out to get around the ignore system b3ta has put into place I think it's fair you mod edit her posts to blank.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:16, Reply)
If she's deliberatly logging out to get around the ignore system b3ta has put into place I think it's fair you mod edit her posts to blank.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:16, Reply)
The only way you'd know this is if you were logging out
to see what she was saying about you.
Just to point out the obvious.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
to see what she was saying about you.
Just to point out the obvious.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
Not the point, I don't respond to her posts, I've tried repeatedly to get her to leave me alone.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:24, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:24, Reply)
it's easy to do
you say, "sorry, i admit i didn't really treat you very well."
and then the whole thing goes away, like magic.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)
you say, "sorry, i admit i didn't really treat you very well."
and then the whole thing goes away, like magic.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)
I think, now, i might be wrong, but Quentin fucked chompy's mrs, and then told swipey,
who fucked chompy, and then q fucked swipe, and then monty gave them all some drugs, that got nicked by kroney, who then flounced off after calling swipeys boyfriend a stripper, and some fella called bert was the mastermind of the whole thing, and something to do with batshitmentalist and baically all the bashes are actually some sort of swingers party organised by a man who dresses in steampunk and can't ride a bicycle.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)
who fucked chompy, and then q fucked swipe, and then monty gave them all some drugs, that got nicked by kroney, who then flounced off after calling swipeys boyfriend a stripper, and some fella called bert was the mastermind of the whole thing, and something to do with batshitmentalist and baically all the bashes are actually some sort of swingers party organised by a man who dresses in steampunk and can't ride a bicycle.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)
I have absolutley nothing to apologise for, no matter what you've heard.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:29, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:29, Reply)
The absolute entirety of one side of the story.
I have also heard one side of some other stories.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:32, Reply)
I have also heard one side of some other stories.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:32, Reply)
I'm not trying to impress you
I couldn't give a fuck what other people get up to.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)
I couldn't give a fuck what other people get up to.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)
I'm very much of the
"you leave me alone, I'll leave you alone" school.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)
"you leave me alone, I'll leave you alone" school.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)
Hurrah it's circular argument time
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1722879
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:53, Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1722879
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:53, Reply)
if they hate each other so much, they could just hire proxies to dick each other
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:19, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:19, Reply)
If they hate each other so much why don't they just live there...
oh, hang on...
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:43, Reply)
oh, hang on...
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:43, Reply)
Is she saying anything offensive though?
I can't just mod posts because you find them annoying. Maybe if she put your real name up or something, but not just because you find her irritating.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I can't just mod posts because you find them annoying. Maybe if she put your real name up or something, but not just because you find her irritating.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
She's doing a workaround of a feature that has been put into place by rob and scaryduck.
That's reason enough for mod action I think.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:24, Reply)
That's reason enough for mod action I think.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:24, Reply)
The other option is that cr3 has to recode the log in to post feature.
Which is a waste of time rather than people just accepting that they're on ignore and not replying.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:30, Reply)
Which is a waste of time rather than people just accepting that they're on ignore and not replying.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:30, Reply)
You told her to stop and she did it again immediatly afterwards.
You've got mod powers use them or people will just ignore you.
With limited basic powers comes limited basic responsibility b3th.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:39, Reply)
You've got mod powers use them or people will just ignore you.
With limited basic powers comes limited basic responsibility b3th.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:39, Reply)
Basically it's either that or I start deleting post she replies to and we all know how popular that is.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:55, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:55, Reply)
So, is she not allowed to post in any thread you're in,
or just not allowed to address you directly?
Just so I know what to look out for.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:58, Reply)
or just not allowed to address you directly?
Just so I know what to look out for.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:58, Reply)
Ideally she'd be banned forever but I'm willing to compromise to just not replying to anything I post.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:01, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:01, Reply)
Right, look, whatever this is about, and believe me when I say I do not care,
it has no place on here, and if you've put her on ignore then let that be an end of it. You're coming off as a proper whining shitcunt and drawing more attention to whatever this drama is about than if you just let it go. You can't stop people replying to you, just deal with it.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)
it has no place on here, and if you've put her on ignore then let that be an end of it. You're coming off as a proper whining shitcunt and drawing more attention to whatever this drama is about than if you just let it go. You can't stop people replying to you, just deal with it.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)
Whoever implemented ignore 2.0 deserves to be punished for pandering to crybaby shitcunts
b3ta.com/questions/worstpersonforthejob/post1721395
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
b3ta.com/questions/worstpersonforthejob/post1721395
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
says the guy who only managed to get his first "girlfriend" aged 30
BEST IRONYLOLS EVER
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:11, Reply)
BEST IRONYLOLS EVER
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:11, Reply)
Er... I thought you two were on LOLIgnore2.0?
Or did I miss something?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)
Or did I miss something?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)
Well, if you creep-gaz every female on b3ta
sooner or later the law of averages says you'll succeed.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:19, Reply)
sooner or later the law of averages says you'll succeed.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:19, Reply)
haha give me one area of life in which he could possibly be have said to be "succeeding"
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:21, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:21, Reply)
oh alright, i don't mind if you delete them
it won't change him being a cunt
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:22, Reply)
it won't change him being a cunt
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:22, Reply)
I have de-tramped for today
I hate shaving, but I hate shaving after 5 days more. WOE IS ME
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I hate shaving, but I hate shaving after 5 days more. WOE IS ME
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I was sure he was a goner that last time.
I bet they've got an android or a stand-in to replace him just until after the new year, then they'll break the news.
Can't have anything upsetting the Olympic year.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:02, Reply)
I bet they've got an android or a stand-in to replace him just until after the new year, then they'll break the news.
Can't have anything upsetting the Olympic year.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:02, Reply)
One of the billion reasons why hollyoaks is awesome.
There is a gay irish gangaster called brendon ( twitter.com/ho_doubleb ) who called it The Flavour Saver.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:58, Reply)
There is a gay irish gangaster called brendon ( twitter.com/ho_doubleb ) who called it The Flavour Saver.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 14:58, Reply)
Unless you're a fourteen year old boy having a wank over the lesbian one. I'm assuming there's a lesbian one. There's always a lesbian one.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:08, Reply)
Afternoon sportshulk, I might leave work in a little bit and cruise for some honeys or otters whatever comes first
Which'll be me BOOM!
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:19, Reply)
Which'll be me BOOM!
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:19, Reply)
I have a pile of toys to take home as it is cow Jr's 3rd birthday soon
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)
Lucky jr
Talkin of presents, Apparently I don't buy mrs ape enough "just because" presents...this is what happens when i let her out to see friends!
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:25, Reply)
Talkin of presents, Apparently I don't buy mrs ape enough "just because" presents...this is what happens when i let her out to see friends!
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:25, Reply)
You could buy her a mop and bucket "just because " the floor needs cleaning?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)
My bro bought his missus a mop and bucket one Xmas
and got away with it. I'd have been given my bollocks on a platter, and reminded of it every week for the next 70. years.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
and got away with it. I'd have been given my bollocks on a platter, and reminded of it every week for the next 70. years.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
nah, too slow
you should already have decided what he's done wrong, but refuse to say so as he should know.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:31, Reply)
you should already have decided what he's done wrong, but refuse to say so as he should know.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:31, Reply)
Now, I know I'm 'odd' as far as women go
which explains why I'm here. But I really don't get that kind of sulky behaviour. I'm not psychic, love. If I've broken some randomly set arbitrary rule, I can't be expected to realise, can I?
It's like playing football, but no-one tells you where the goals are. Or if you score a goal at all. But if you miss a penalty, you get shot.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
which explains why I'm here. But I really don't get that kind of sulky behaviour. I'm not psychic, love. If I've broken some randomly set arbitrary rule, I can't be expected to realise, can I?
It's like playing football, but no-one tells you where the goals are. Or if you score a goal at all. But if you miss a penalty, you get shot.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:35, Reply)
Keep buying her things like toilet cleaner and washing up gloves.
"I got you a present, just because"
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:32, Reply)
"I got you a present, just because"
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:32, Reply)
Tell her that that's 'just because' she's a money-grubbing cunt
and if she doesn't shut the fuck up pronto you'll iron her face 'just because' you fucking hate her.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:40, Reply)
and if she doesn't shut the fuck up pronto you'll iron her face 'just because' you fucking hate her.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:40, Reply)
Yes but she won't know that.
Seriously, he needs to follow these instructions to the letter.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)
Seriously, he needs to follow these instructions to the letter.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)
This is a very old phrase, in fact it's been mentioned on the Simpsons by Ned Flanders
Hollyoaks is shit, unlike my haircut which is all of the sexeh
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)
Hollyoaks is shit, unlike my haircut which is all of the sexeh
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)
It was quite clever, for you.
Did Mummy help you with it, or did you do it all by yourself?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Did Mummy help you with it, or did you do it all by yourself?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:21, Reply)
He's stepped at the moment,
but I don't know if it's a permanent banning.
*crosses fingers*
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:36, Reply)
but I don't know if it's a permanent banning.
*crosses fingers*
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:36, Reply)
I hope Darth Thatch doesn't die this year.
I haven't got any holiday left.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)
I haven't got any holiday left.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)
Oh fuck, I just clicked on a link from talk and ended up here :(
So, which QOTWer is the fattest?
Post your BMIs here
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:38, Reply)
So, which QOTWer is the fattest?
Post your BMIs here
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:38, Reply)
Can I just say something?
No, hear me out, right. I'm the kind of fellow who prides himself on his manners and exemplary conduct. I have no time for rudeness, bullying, all that crazy talk, but sometimes a chap has to stand up for what's right and call a spade acoon spade. So here goes:
This is a shit thread.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:39, Reply)
No, hear me out, right. I'm the kind of fellow who prides himself on his manners and exemplary conduct. I have no time for rudeness, bullying, all that crazy talk, but sometimes a chap has to stand up for what's right and call a spade a
This is a shit thread.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:39, Reply)
I've had ONE WHOLE PERSON
say that it suits me, Mr Lovely, so eat shit.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:48, Reply)
say that it suits me, Mr Lovely, so eat shit.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:48, Reply)
I don't know who that is
but I'm going to assume it's somebody very handsome.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:57, Reply)
but I'm going to assume it's somebody very handsome.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:57, Reply)
Although I enjoy the fact naked ape has to buy his wifes affection now.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:58, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 15:58, Reply)
Don't worry about it,
You're back on the bona fida QOTW and spreading yourself over that and Off Topic... - so what if there's a dud one every now and then?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:14, Reply)
You're back on the bona fida QOTW and spreading yourself over that and Off Topic... - so what if there's a dud one every now and then?
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:14, Reply)
This threads too long,
someone give me the highlights so we can move on.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:00, Reply)
someone give me the highlights so we can move on.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:00, Reply)
ginster's chicken and bacon sandwich, a bottle of coke and prawn cocktail crisps
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)
Chompy hates swipe.
Swipe is deliberately baiting Chompy to make him snap.
This is my fault because I am not deleting her posts.
Oh, and Kroney has a gay attempt at a moustache. And Sportscow has sweaty balls. And NA can't get laid unless he buys his wife stuff.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)
Swipe is deliberately baiting Chompy to make him snap.
This is my fault because I am not deleting her posts.
Oh, and Kroney has a gay attempt at a moustache. And Sportscow has sweaty balls. And NA can't get laid unless he buys his wife stuff.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)
thanks b3th,
of all the mods, you're the one i like the most.
Can i point out what swipey is doing (baiting chompy) is what quentin was doing? and where is quentin eh? EH? TELL ME THAT????
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:05, Reply)
of all the mods, you're the one i like the most.
Can i point out what swipey is doing (baiting chompy) is what quentin was doing? and where is quentin eh? EH? TELL ME THAT????
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:05, Reply)
hang on
if nobody can bait anybody on here any more, we might as well go back to posting pictures of cakes.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:07, Reply)
if nobody can bait anybody on here any more, we might as well go back to posting pictures of cakes.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:07, Reply)
Errrr, this^
Isn't this what this site is about?
I admit Swipe V Chompy Round XXXIX is SRS BSNSS but hey ho.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)
Isn't this what this site is about?
I admit Swipe V Chompy Round XXXIX is SRS BSNSS but hey ho.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)
to be fair,
it is warm today, i'd be worried if his balls weren't sweaty, probably mean they were broken. with cancer. What i'm saying is, anyone without sweaty balls has cancer.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:11, Reply)
it is warm today, i'd be worried if his balls weren't sweaty, probably mean they were broken. with cancer. What i'm saying is, anyone without sweaty balls has cancer.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:11, Reply)
you've clearly never chilled a mug in the fridge then put it down your pants to cradle and protect your genitals
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:27, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:27, Reply)
phew
i quite like you, i don't want to start believing what they all say about you
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)
i quite like you, i don't want to start believing what they all say about you
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)
WHAT THE FUCK HAVE THEY BEEN SAYING?
nah, it's cool, they can say what they like.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)
nah, it's cool, they can say what they like.
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)
something about you being quite hot but fucking donkeys on the side
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:16, Reply)
( , Fri 7 Sep 2012, 16:16, Reply)
« Go Back | Reply To This »