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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Beefy has ebola, let's all say what we really feel about him so he can die happy.
Do you get ill? I'm lucky to either just get a sore throat and maybe the sniffles mist of the time. But then once every now and again, maybe once every 2 years, I get all of the ill at once. Like stuck in the bathroom crying ill.

Alt: beards. Yes or no?

Altalt: upset?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:01, 249 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
I'm sure it's ebola, because he takes drugs.
And all drug dealer are black man. And they're from Africa. Which is where ebola was invented.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:02, Reply)
ManBeef.
Nuffsaid.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:02, Reply)
I hope you get cancer.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:03, Reply)
I know this one.
Rhythm is a dancer by the popular beat combo Snap!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:07, Reply)

I hope you get cancer
It's a constant companion
You can feel it everywhere
Lift your hands and cough now
It's spread to your lymph nodes
You can feel it everywhere

Oh it's a stage 3
Oh you can feel it yeah
Oh it's inoperable
Ohh yeah.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:13, Reply)
srs cncr

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:14, Reply)
I'm always ill, it's probably down to having bad AIDS
Alt: Yes
Altalt: Yes
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:04, Reply)
^altalt

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:05, Reply)
btw you have paedoaids
sorry to be the bearer etc etc.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:06, Reply)
Apology accepted

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:06, Reply)
^Stunneds

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:06, Reply)
I have a cold right now, Windy.
I'm just not blooblooing about it like McEbeefa.
It's normal and healthy to get several colds a year.
Other than that, I am a picture of good health.

Alt: Yes, but only on men.

Altalt: Yes, but only online.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:06, Reply)
You're a picture of something alright.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:26, Reply)
Dorian Gray

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:51, Reply)
I get a bit of a cold every september when the filthy students come back
Beefy dying eh? Well 70% chance or something. How do I feel about him though? Interesting question. Once I loved him like a brother. I would have followed him into battle, on horseback, my broadsword shining bright. But then the bastard started calling me Jethro and so I hope he survives the ebola, but it makes his cock fall off so he has to sit down to pee and can't do the sex with Stunned Poster anymore.

Alt. Not for me and hipster cunts look like cunts with them. Proper beards are ok though, like on Father Christmas.

AltAlt. Yes. Big time.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:07, Reply)
I share my doctors surgery with all the students in halls.
Being ill in term time is a right pain in the arse. They usually give me an appointment in 2.5 weeks time, by which I'll be better or dead. All because some teenagers lack the gumption to find the walk-in GUM clinic, pricks.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:10, Reply)
We have forrins here so I expect to have ebola by the end of the week

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:11, Reply)
Facking forrin cahnts.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:15, Reply)
Our token black worker is off ill, don't suppose he'll be back

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:16, Reply)
We had a token black worker once but he got a better job and quit.
Everyone else is white as the ace of ummmmmm snow?
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:17, Reply)
Our token black worker only works part time, because all blacks are lazy and nothing to do with that being the length of time we need him to perform his job of work

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:18, Reply)
This is what I've been saying all along.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:20, Reply)
Yeah but who's gonna listen.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:23, Reply)
So you are left doing a job that even Token didn't want?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:19, Reply)
Oh definitely not, I'm white and male so I was far further up the pecking order than he was.

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:21, Reply)
I thought Cornishers were below blacks in the 2014 official pecking order.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:22, Reply)
Well you thought wrong, we are one of the last places still holding out against them
With a 98.2% White population and just 0.2% blacks. You other parts of the country should pay attention! The 2011 Census put the Muslim population on Cornwall at 0.0% thats right, no muzzas!

Could you afford that?
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:28, Reply)

I'm there.

Are there lots of children too?
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:31, Reply)
We've got enough Paedos thanks, what with Gary Glitter hiding out down here

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:32, Reply)
Lewisham is 53% white.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:32, Reply)
Sounds shit.

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:33, Reply)
It is.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:34, Reply)

53% white south of the river. *pats sympathetically*
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:34, Reply)
Don't be mean, we've been to stunned posters 'hood, the only black thing we saw was his crystallised foot

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:45, Reply)
and his desiccated heart

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:48, Reply)
And the charred remains of the leathery pheasant we had for dinner

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:49, Reply)

In the 2011 census the population of Whitley Bay was 9,416 and is made up of approximately 51% females and 49% males.
The average age of people in Whitley Bay is 39, while the median age is higher at 40.
89.9% of people living in Whitley Bay were born in England. Other top answers for country of birth were 2.9% Scotland, 0.6% Bangladesh, 0.5% Wales, 0.5% Northern Ireland, 0.4% Ireland, 0.3% South Africa, 0.3% India, 0.3% United States, 0.2% Australia.
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:36, Reply)
who comes all the way from australia
and ends up in whitley??
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:39, Reply)
My mate Nina did
after marrying a Welshman
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:41, Reply)
Jesus.
She must have done something pretty horrific in a past life.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:43, Reply)
She's doing something pretty horrific now!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:43, Reply)
I'm sure Australia has places as bad or worse.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:44, Reply)
i don't think it's bad, i mean, it's not in the midlands or anything inhumane
i just think it's tres random
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:57, Reply)
Yeh but how many of the 89.9% born in England were black?

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:40, Reply)
And how many ended up that way down t'pit

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:43, Reply)
I thought Whitley Bay didn't have any pits
It turns out it did have one

This happened nearby though
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:47, Reply)
Poor Hare

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:52, Reply)
I thought you might pick that up

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:57, Reply)
I expected him to leveret into conversation.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:08, Reply)
*small cricket ripple*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:13, Reply)
All of them, sir

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:43, Reply)
Course you were, sweetheart.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:22, Reply)
Ebola didn't start in Devon

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:28, Reply)
Altalt: get a new joke man

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:08, Reply)
Did you hear the one about Ku Klux Knieval?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:11, Reply)
WITHAKNIFE!

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:12, Reply)
No.
KILOSPOON!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:14, Reply)
*Sniff* I remember when beefy used to say that
4EVA in R HARTS WID DA ANGLES
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:16, Reply)
My immune system must be amazing
I've hardly ever been ill. Last time I was properly ill was flu about 1999, and perhaps once since

Alt:
Normal beard = OK. Hipster bread = shit

AltAlt:
Never
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:16, Reply)
Alright Bruce Willis, what do you want? A pay rise or something?

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:17, Reply)
A car allowance?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:19, Reply)
:o(

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:23, Reply)
Yippeekiyay

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:24, Reply)
This is not how the immune system works and you will be killed by a simple cold virus

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:30, Reply)
Take two carrots and call me in the morning

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:34, Reply)
hi "in the morning"!

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:37, Reply)
^shirley^

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:48, Reply)
^^a person who works in IT, but that's not important right now

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:58, Reply)
alright internet bumchums

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:21, Reply)
HANDS UP WHO LIKES BAGGENFOCK

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:23, Reply)
baggenfock has his hands up...
...his daughter's skirt
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:25, Reply)
The bowler's Holding the batsmen's Willy.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:29, Reply)
I don't like him, I don't really dislike him, he's just boring. And a racist paedophile.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:27, Reply)
you say that like it's a bad thing.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:29, Reply)
So you don't dislike racist paedophiles? I fucking do.
Black 4 year olds need love too you know!
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:29, Reply)
I fucking know alright.
I mean I KNOW.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:31, Reply)
I just think if you're going to be a nonce you shouldn't be fussy

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:32, Reply)
Dunno who that is soz

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:31, Reply)
the l8est bloobloo self important internet policeman

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:32, Reply)
the mince beef is an excellent human being and all-round good egg
i have a pretty good immune system, but if i get a cold, it goes straight to my feeble asthma-chest, and i cough like a mong for fucking weeks.

alt: most men look better with stubble/light beard. but not a full on santa beard, no.

altalt: not yet.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:33, Reply)

the mince beef is an excellent human being and all-round good egg
have a pretty good immune syste but if i get a cold, it goes straight to my feeble asthma-chest, and i cough like
weeks.

alt: look better with stubble/light beard. but not a full on santa beard, no.

altalt: not yet.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:37, Reply)
Thanks, yes I do

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:38, Reply)
you are pretty dreamy

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:38, Reply)
you fancy mangles

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:38, Reply)
you fancy peej

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:38, Reply)
So? So do you.

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:41, Reply)
when i want to be fingered by 6 fingers on the same hand
i'll borrow a pair of your gloves.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:49, Reply)
I bet he can play banjo really well, too

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:01, Reply)
I play guitar better
but I'm better at Banjo than Mandolin but not as good as Ukelele. You see?
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:07, Reply)
how are you at banjolele?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:09, Reply)
Exactly the same as Ukelele
Only difference is the body.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:10, Reply)
*Deliverance theme*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:11, Reply)
Yurt prick

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:10, Reply)
I play a lot of instruments
but I'm afraid I know little of yurts
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:11, Reply)
this will end well
www.b3ta.com/questions/nepotism/post2391893
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:40, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 13:59, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:02, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:02, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:02, Reply)
etc

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:02, Reply)
delete this please

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:11, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:03, Reply)
I just said that!
FFS
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:06, Reply)
etc

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:08, Reply)
I just said that!
FFS
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:09, Reply)
groundhog day on qotw again, with sockpuppets

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:10, Reply)
I very rarely get ill
I put it down to having an office on my own and living in the countryside, plus of course my heavy smoking regime which keeps my lungs in a tip top condition.

Alt No... beards are for necrononces

Alt alt, fucking busy, whats this shit with people wanting me to work
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:12, Reply)
Smoke yourself healthy

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:22, Reply)
Seems to work:
Plus it makes me look sexy and cool like those French actors
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:26, Reply)
Oh boy, they sure do!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:28, Reply)
You finally got a picture of my doppelganger!

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:30, Reply)
homelol

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:32, Reply)
Any man whose reaction to a request to stop drinking is to openly piss in a gangway is a fucking hero to me.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:33, Reply)
This ^

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:34, Reply)
Did you see the Daily Mail thing from a few weeks ago where he claimed to drink 12 bottles of wine a day?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:37, Reply)
Amateur.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:38, Reply)
With a bit of spirits in between to freshen the palate.
The man must smell delightful.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:40, Reply)
hahahaha
French cunt.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:47, Reply)
I'm amazed he dares attempt lighting a fag
surely he'd go up like a Christmas pudding?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:47, Reply)
14 bottles plus apperatifs
There was a bit a while back about eating lunch with him saying he went through 2 or 3 whole chickens, sausages, pasta olives, a few cheese boards several desserts...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:40, Reply)
That's a man who knows how to live. (just not for long)

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:43, Reply)
I think a day with him would be entertaining

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:47, Reply)
I think I would need a month to recover

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:49, Reply)
I'm not sure I'd make it past about 2pm

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:56, Reply)
Darn tooting
And to be fair to the fat drunk he is a legend who porked his way through just about every French actress of the 70s
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:30, Reply)
There was a photo of him in the paper the other week
He is now entirely round
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:32, Reply)
He claims to drink 14 bottles of wine a day
I am a bit of a dooooopeeeeedoooo fan to be honest...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:34, Reply)
Any ill I get is usually brought home by the sprogs from school
which is every winter, mostly.

alt: either shave or proper beard, anything else GTFO. Especially those stupid underchin square things beloved of "nu-metal" types.

altalt: nope, chilled
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:24, Reply)
With a son in nursery, a daughter in school and a wife teaching at another school
I should get everything going really
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:26, Reply)
Yeah but these sprogs have no shared genetic base with lokesy so it must be the miss matched genes

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:31, Reply)
The milkman, the postman and the Asda delivery guy are ALWAYS ill though

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:33, Reply)
should have delivered to the back door, etc.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:43, Reply)
Im having the busiest day :(
2 in a row, the Gods are against me.
I reckon beefy should go back to being Monty. it's where he was most popular.

alt. yes but not huge ones.

altalt. I did have a brief work meltdown earlier, yes.
The world of PPI can be a cruel mistress
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:27, Reply)
Oh and im never ill, I have a very healthy immune system, despite the AIDS

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:28, Reply)
It'll be all those injections in your arse

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:29, Reply)
Beef injections, presumably?
*Looks accusingly at Sporters*
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:37, Reply)
I slipped, OK?!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:37, Reply)
Once is an accident, twice is coincidence, but...

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:38, Reply)
Three times a lady

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:58, Reply)
alright, jsyk, when I deal with claims management companies it's laughably easy to reject the complaint and also to get the Ombudsman to reject it.
It's almost as if CMCs are staffed by a parade of thick Northern cunts who spend their minimum wage paypackets on elasticated jeans, alcopops and vests.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:40, Reply)
er.............. you "work" in the compliance team
you answer petty little queries raised by the dynamic and creative people doing the real work. this is your life, plumdozer.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:42, Reply)
no, I handle complaints work and liaise with FOS, defending the firm against compensation claims as high as 150k.
They don't get higher.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:45, Reply)
NO CUNT CHAT

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:46, Reply)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:47, Reply)
best one recently was one where some cunt has lost 495k.
He's getting zero compensation.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:47, Reply)
I took someone's house a few months back.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:51, Reply)
It was Joey Deacons, and now you live there as you're an even bigger spastic.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:54, Reply)
Wow, that's a whole nother step beyond the guy who has sex with cars

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:55, Reply)
Chinny reKON m8.

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:59, Reply)
when you come up with an idea that will net you £4.95, you can mock, monkey boy

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:59, Reply)
it were well lol 'bloobloobloo half a mil in and five grand back bloobloobloo'
Our PI insurers were most pleased.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:07, Reply)
Did you celebrate with a Magnum

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:18, Reply)
BORING! CH-CH-CHA!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:46, Reply)
His misplaced sense of self worth is palpable.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:55, Reply)
you're a cog
a tiny squeaky little cog
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:59, Reply)
ERM EXCUSE ME!!!
I do NOT drink alcopops
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:54, Reply)
Calf 2 has apparently recovered without incident
Impressive recovery considering he was vomming 4 hours ago
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 14:59, Reply)
Better out than in

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:02, Reply)
It would seem so

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:05, Reply)
I am on my way to meet my new team, I have made them autumnal Chelsea buns
Alt: facial or anal?

Altalt: of course
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:14, Reply)
That's a bit gay.
You're going to turn up with baked goods?

Marketing chutneys.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:19, Reply)
It's tea and cake Wednesday, I don't make the rules
And technically I'm not a marketing cunt anymore
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:25, Reply)
What kind of cunt are you now?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:26, Reply)
A massive one, well depending on your opinions and political leanings

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:27, Reply)
Who do you work for now, UKIP?

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:28, Reply)
Nope

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:30, Reply)
BNaked aPe

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:31, Reply)
It was there for all to see!
That is some illuminati shit right there
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:34, Reply)
*Robert Langdons*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:36, Reply)
Your new team will think you're a massive bender.
Especially in *those* pants.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:19, Reply)
You have never seen my pants

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:26, Reply)
I have just eaten a pack of salted peanuts and now my lips feel weird

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:18, Reply)

eaten a pack of salted peanuts sucked off someone from west africa
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:24, Reply)
eblowla

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:25, Reply)
salted peanuts or dry roasted peanuts?
which one wins?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:54, Reply)
Honey or chilli

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:55, Reply)
honey?
feck orf.

chilli or salt and vinegar are good though.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:56, Reply)
Foodwrong
Honey roasted cashews and peanuts are all of the win
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:04, Reply)
no
hotel chocolat do roasted salted nuts covered in chocolate. that is a good combination.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:09, Reply)
Chocolate salty balls

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:15, Reply)
suck on them, bitch

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:20, Reply)
*has the fear*

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:38, Reply)
TEXT ME

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:56, Reply)
DELETE THIS PLEASE

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:56, Reply)
Little bit needy there m8

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:05, Reply)
I only wanted to try out my new telephone :(

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:40, Reply)
A likely story

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:03, Reply)
It's okay everyone, I've got my new phone and apparently it *might* work in two hours!!!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:19, Reply)
I managed to drop mine a few weeks ago and cracked the screen
Still waiting for a new screen to turn up
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:25, Reply)
Ooooh it's already working

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:40, Reply)
Phone a random number
and shout "Get off the line, there's a train coming!!" and hang up.

MegaLOLs
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:41, Reply)
I don't get it

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:42, Reply)
When he said "megalols", I doubt his sincerity.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:43, Reply)
I doubt his ability to be amusing

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:47, Reply)
He called Windy Pig humourless.
I'm not sure he knows what humour is.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:52, Reply)
It's a 'prank'.
If he films it and puts it on Youtube: £££££
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:44, Reply)
It hasn't yet synchronised my proper numbers, I cant be messing around with random ones

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:53, Reply)
It will take some time after porting
#phoneexpert

depending on the models to transition they may miss things however if you have an O2 shop near you they should have access to a Cellbrite machine which can do a full transfer of information picture etc.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:57, Reply)
It's all in the smart switch cloud app, just have to do it via wifi on the old handset later
Thanks though xx
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:01, Reply)
No worries,
You will find you get the best reception on transfer signal if you hold the new phone underwater during this
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:04, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
NOT REALLY ITS CALLED A PRANK
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:04, Reply)
Nice one Baggzo

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:07, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
I am still laughing at that prank, I feel as funny as Ashten Kutcher when he would prank celebs HAHAHAAHHAHAHAH
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:13, Reply)
Ledgebants

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:20, Reply)
Just pop over to Reddit...
You've probably already been hacked senseless and you'll be able to download everything from there.
(Twangy Rubber, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:07, Reply)
I don't undersatnd the cloud, or reedit for that matter

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:08, Reply)
It just means it's on a computer somewhere else where I'm not but I can get into it i think
Reedit is shit
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:21, Reply)
It's the bit of the internet where memes go to die.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:27, Reply)
'Cloud' is the trendy new 2.0 name for 'server'

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:45, Reply)
i write them down
and then add them all manually when i get a new phone. it takes ages.

is this not the best way to do it?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:04, Reply)
Alright me?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:07, Reply)
Computers eh? What a palaver.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:07, Reply)
*half shark fives*

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:09, Reply)
Damien Hirst's new exhibition

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:11, Reply)
Haha, aww, bless.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:15, Reply)
here love, talk to Tone
Click
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:56, Reply)
#Joeyhands

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 15:58, Reply)
Much the same, my last proper deathlurgy coincided with a week off work which I was NOT happy about
Alt: Beards rule.
AltAlt: Just a bit tired is all.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:14, Reply)
What's up with Monty's name change?
Is he flouncing again?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:25, Reply)
baggenfock strikes again. he's one tough hombre

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:26, Reply)
Damn him and his pranks!!

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:28, Reply)
i'm sticking that cunt on ignore, he ent gonna prank me into a flounce, no siree

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:30, Reply)
I nearly flounced earlier when he called me upset for the millionth time, he's ruining everything

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:39, Reply)
I was only yanking your chain m8.
I know in reality you're as successful, well adjusted and content as everyone else posting on here.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:44, Reply)
Yeah I'm alright me

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:46, Reply)
^upset

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:46, Reply)
Like you were on Saturday when you were to busy crying to meet up you big baby

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:47, Reply)
tru dat

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:54, Reply)
I miss you :'(''''''''''''''''''

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:57, Reply)
miss you too, bbz

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:00, Reply)
Upset about what?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:55, Reply)
Anything you want.
All the cool kids are doing it.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:57, Reply)
Dunno how cool I am, and I'm not a kid :((

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 16:58, Reply)
You aint a doctor either
but that never stopped you fisting grannies
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:04, Reply)
I am not upset, I am going to the pub

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:10, Reply)
alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:16, Reply)
I get one cold a year.I have had Flu which nearly killed me a few years ago
Alt: I have a beard therefore they are great
Altalt: No
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 15 Oct 2014, 17:49, Reply)

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