I just shouted at my printer
Ok, so we all know technology can be useful, but that is based on the premise of it actually working. I'm using a printer which rarely takes in paper, and then when it does, it takes over a minute to print a page of text. I may have just stood and shouted at it quite a lot.

To keep up tradition, a question: what's your most hated piece of technology?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:06, 166 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Why don't you buy a new printer?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:07, Reply)

that's where it starts
man, never buy a printer. email stuff to yourself at work and print it there. prinitng ink is expensive and the fucking stuff evaporates, i swear.
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:08, Reply)

I did this during summer
And usually print in uni, although the network printers there take minutes just to receive the data.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Because I have a decent printer, but it's at my flat
Whereas I'm at my parents house. And I don't plan to buy them a new printer.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:08, Reply)

the seed drill
can't get the hang of this modern stuff.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Damn you, Jethro Tull!

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:09, Reply)

with your agriculture
and your flute playing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:13, Reply)

He was a right cock
No-one even asked him to revolutionise agriculture.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:21, Reply)

The plotter at work
It frequently spazes out when printing large PDF drawings
( M o D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:12, Reply)

Call it "Harry" for hours of work related hilarity

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

I am going to write harry on the side now

( M o D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

I'm going to do that to the one here too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

Superb Armando Ianucci sketch involving an East End Thug fixing household appliances
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAGlUUAmjxk
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:14, Reply)

I LOVE Ianucci
in a non-bottom way, obv.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:52, Reply)

The Armando Ianuuci Show was amazing.
Very surreal, but always spot on. That East End thug sketch is one of my all time favourites, that and the 'dyslexic cockney' one as well. Alan Ford IS the daddy!
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:04, Reply)

The telephone
but only because nobody ever calls me, apart from the woman who tries to sell me double glazing every month, she sounds lovely. She phones me every month without fail even though I keep telling her I already have double glazing.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Computers.
I hate them.
I hate them because I don't understand them.
I hate them when they go wrong and I don't know how to fix them.
I hate them when they won't do what I tell them to.
I hate them when they make strange noises reminding me that they could go wrong at any time and I'd be fucked because I don't know how to fix them.
I hate them because I can't do without them for work, for shopping and communicating.
I wish they had never been invented.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Embrace them and the lovely people who know how to fix them when they go wrong
I have no idea of how to fix mine when it chucks a hissy fit, so I've ensured that I'm surrounded by people who do know what to do with it on such occasions .
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:21, Reply)

So basically I have to have sex with a geek?
I've been trying to do that all year.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:42, Reply)

Maybe you could try
having sex with a Greek instead, probably easier. Or even a leek. Easier still, AND you make a post coitius pot of soup.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:47, Reply)

Haha!
I'm off to one of the Greek Islands this year.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:49, Reply)

My experience earlier this year says stay away from Greeks
(bearing gifts or penises)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:52, Reply)

I don't like the dark and swarthy type.
I like the pale and interesting type.

Tourettes has promised to keep the Greek guys away from me. I told her to tell them I have teh bad aids.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

I dunno what my type is any more
But it certainly ain't mental mummy's boy stalking Greeks who tell tall adventurous tales of Edmund proportions.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:11, Reply)

If things don't shape up cock-wise for you
I'm guessing Lesbos?

PS cockwise, the brilliant remake of the John Cleese film, but starring Graham Norton.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Would that be like
Cock-a-leekie soup?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Cock-a-reekie more like it

*hides*
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:06, Reply)

You're always picking on me.
What is it with you. Do you hate old ladies or summat?
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Old..... come on!!
Comfortable with your age is a better description. I wouldn't like to think I pick on anyone, now come over here for a wee cuddle.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Can I have a cuddle without the wee?
I'm not into water sports.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:22, Reply)

You see....
I try to offer an olive branch, with no innuendo in sight, and THIS is how you repay me. Well, have it your way.


Time for a 'SURPRISE CUDDLE'

*unzips*
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:27, Reply)

Put it away.
You'll take someone's eye out with that.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:30, Reply)

*looks down*
Yeah, you're right, it IS very tapered.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:39, Reply)

You don't have to have sex with him
It'd probably help though
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:30, Reply)

Car.
Engine light been on since October. I have covered it with masking tape and am hoping it will go away.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Vauxhall?
Just means it's due a service
( M o D, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

Wow!
It is a Zafira!
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Light on my Astras been on for two years now.
The garage wanted sixty quid to investigate, so I bought a cable off of fleabay and hooked the the thing up to a laptop. Turned out to be some incredibly minor fault. Relief all round.
(barnaby_kettleworth, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:48, Reply)

You did the right thing.
turning the stereo volume up can fix strange noises coming from the engine.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

True dat
It's a tried and tested method. If you can't hear it, it can't break.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

I find that the engine light in my car means "faulty engine light"

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Or faulty eye-sight.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Have you tried stroking the printer and saying tender things?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:27, Reply)

You may joke about such things
But our old computing teacher used to tell us that if your computer froze, you should rub the tower* to warm it up again, and then it'd be fine. Then again, she also once did the pick-up-iron-not-telephone thing.


*Fnar.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:30, Reply)

There was a big fridge in the kitchen where I worked when I was a student
and it was really stiff, and the door would not yield unless I stroked it and said "y'alright lil' fridge? Be nice."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:40, Reply)

Y'know how I said you were a bit mental earlier?
You're not doing much to change my mind just now.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:47, Reply)

Everyone does these things
I admit them, and that might be the only thing that makes me mental. My other actions and beliefs are more common than anyone would care to admit.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:49, Reply)

I would possibly contend that point
But I shant, because it seemed eloquently phrased.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:50, Reply)

Thank you

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:53, Reply)

If I was a boy, just for one day, i'ld drink with the guys, and chase after girls.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Toasted Sandwich Maker
They never work properly and either seriously undercook the bread, which then makes all the contents all soggy-like, or they frazzle the bread to a crisp and all the cheese melts and bleeds out onto the kitchen side... they make me sad :(
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Dearest 'flam
My toastie maker is one of the few things I actually get on with consistently. Toasties for lunch 6 days a week usually :D Unless you're trying to use one of those George Foreman style ones, rather than one with triangle bits inside?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:47, Reply)

Haha
I congratulate you on possessing a toasted sandwich maker that actually works, keep it close to your heart because it is clearly very special.

I've had about 6 sandwich makers in my life, not one has worked properly - I usually end up donating them to my dad and he'll have toastie parties for a month and then be told to put it in a cupboard by my mum.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Key learnings:
Right type of bread: hovis medium or thick sliced white
Right type of butter on the outside: utterly butterly is found to give the best golden-brown results
Right type of filling: try substituting proper cheese for the fake plastic crap. Tastes like crap in everything but a toasty, and melts at a lower temperature (mostly cos it isn't really cheese).

See, it's all just about having the know-how.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:58, Reply)

I have the know-how
I'm just lacking in the suitable toastie maker, one day I'll fine one, One day!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:20, Reply)

fact
george foreman grill makes a better toasted sandwich than a toasted sandwich maker

lightly oil the george before you put the sandwich in
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Mine didn't, the bread went all soggy and the cheese escaped out the side
*shakes fist at George Foreman*

DAMMIT GEORGE!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:48, Reply)

you're clearly at fault
every one I've made in it has worked beautifully

I made a fantastic chicken, mayo and two types of mustard sandwich the other day
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:50, Reply)

You're clearly wrong
Triangular, sealed toasties are far better.

FACT!
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:52, Reply)

Indeed
I concur with the penguin
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:54, Reply)

Pingu has my vote too.
My brother's mate used to make them with white bread and Mars bars.

He was, it must be said, a fat knacker.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Woo!
Penguin beats beard!
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Is he still with us?

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:58, Reply)

He gave up a 40-a-day cigarette habit
by replacing each smoke with a packet of Monster Munch, but despite this, he lives. In Yorkshire, mind, but he lives.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:05, Reply)

Living in Yorkshire is nothing more than a half-life
Poor man.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:06, Reply)

that is just weird
I'm right on this subject though. I am the sandwich master.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:58, Reply)

sandwich bumhead
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:11, Reply)

I'm not your master
no matter how much you plead
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Hahaha
You really are a spanner sometimes, do you know that! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

harshness
*cries a little*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:16, Reply)

I will concede
that triangular sandwiches are better than oblong

the sealing is irrelevant though, unless you are making something like an egg toastie
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Also
chicken mayo toasties? What sort of toastie freak are you?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:54, Reply)

A smug, upper class one?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Ah good point sir!
Mayo is bad enough, but HOT mayo... *shudders*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Both very good points
Mayo is acceptable if mixed with garlic and herbs, and as a dip.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:59, Reply)

Mayo is never acceptable
it'll only be acceptable to me once the worlds supply is jettisoned off into space for some poor alien to come across and assume its some sort of intergalactic spunk cloud from the future.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:01, Reply)

dislike of mayo aside
one day I will make you a georged sandwich and you will see sense.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:02, Reply)

NEVVVVVVVVVVER
*double air graps - Creed styleee*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:05, Reply)

^ This

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:06, Reply)

why not?
it won't have mayo in it

even a humble cheese toastie is awesome in the george
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:08, Reply)

I'm not against the George sandwich in principle
Remove the mayo and I'm happy to try. Which mustards did you use, by the way? Mustard is one of my specialist fields....

Fox's spices do amazing 'make your own' mustard kits - I thoroughly recommend your trying them. Also, made a chilli with black treacle yet?

I'm assuming not, or I'd have heard your grovelling thanks by now.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:16, Reply)

I'm a huge fan of colmans english
love the taste and the heat. the main mustard for the sandwich was some bog standard wholegrain, but I wanted some power, so I added some English.

make your own mustard sounds good, although my ideal mustard is colman's english, so there seems little point.

I've not done the black treacle chilli yet. I'll cook one as soon as I get my new cooker.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Me too
there's one out there called 'Dragon's Breath' mustard that is great, too.

Did you get your griddle pan, and if so, done' much with it yet?

BONUS TIP: bacon is fucking GREAT griddled.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:27, Reply)

I griddled some lamb souvlaki skewers
and griddled some red pepper and some homemade flatbreads to go with it

then I broke the hob :-(
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:28, Reply)

aaaah, hence the cooker questions on here...

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:29, Reply)

precisely
I've made my decision. It's not the ideal solution, but long term it will work out

I've had to go for an electric hob, but I had one of the ancient style electric ones until I broke it, and anything is better than that

you run a risk with gas as well though apparently. My other half's mum's £900 AEG job can't simmer stuff. the gas doesn't go low enough.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:30, Reply)

Up until a couple of years ago, I would have agreed wholeheartedly
Then I discovered deep-frying pizza dough and dipping it in the stuff. Good and unhealthy, and tasty.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Nope see
you're just ruining perfectly good deep-fried pizza dough. :(
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Partly true
But how else am I meant to make it more unhealthy? I am Scottish after all.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:07, Reply)

cover it in caramel
double fry it and serve it with a plate of lard... you're just not using your imagination are you! :D
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:08, Reply)

Hmm, I like your style
You aren't part-Scot are you?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:11, Reply)

Nope
I'm just livin' the dream until I start to put on weight, then I'll stop! :D
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:15, Reply)

not much mayo
I was dubious at first, but it worked pretty well

I took my lead from the sandwich shop panini, which often has mayo in it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:58, Reply)

In the immortal words of Bill Bailey
I BLEED ON YOUR PANINI!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:59, Reply)

hahaha

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:00, Reply)

hot mayo?
bleeaurgh.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:55, Reply)

HOT MAYO AND FETA SALAD TOASTIE
Oh yes.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:07, Reply)

GET THEE BEHIND ME, SATAN

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:17, Reply)

*gets behind*
*kicks beehind*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:31, Reply)

HOT SALTY MAYO
IN YOUR EYE
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:26, Reply)

THAT'S NO MAYO

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:29, Reply)

IT'S A SAUCE STATION

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Miny is tiny weenie
and was obviously made for Spanish bread and Warburtons/Hovis miniature bread only.
All other bread is too wide and long and this ruins everything.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:50, Reply)

See this is another one of the problems
I don't want to have to cut the bread to size, the machine should be made to fit Hovis white thick bread - its clearly some sort of conspiracy between the toastie makers and the bread companies - bastards!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:56, Reply)

I like Warburton's extra thick toastie

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:12, Reply)

Warburton's can go to hell
it can go right to ruddy hell and die there
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:14, Reply)

Ooh when you want the stodge
it's great!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Nah its always too dry for me
I like Hovis because its always squishy and full of nommy goodness.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:19, Reply)

Surely you're not talking about Warburton's Toastie loaf?
That's not dry and brittle like regular Warburton's.

It's more moist than *insert rudeness*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Hmmmm
I have probably not tried the toastie loaf. I don't go near Warburton's because I was under the impression that all their bread was minging - maybe I shall investigate the toastie loaf.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:24, Reply)

Give it a go.
You won't believe it's Warb's.
(My Grandad sings "Warburton's bread makes you shit like lead, fart like thunder, no bloody wonder")
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:27, Reply)

Hehe
Your granddad sounds like my granddad, he's always singing odd songs he has made up.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:36, Reply)

He makes up ridiculous poems too
And swears like nobody I've ever known
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:53, Reply)

Bean toasties = Molten Beans
Factoid.
(TheColonel, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:13, Reply)

the compact disc.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Is it the disc
Or the contents of the disc that are more likely to make you angry?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:02, Reply)

CDs in general. Some CDs more so than others, mind....
Remember when they came out?

'Oooh you can spread jam on them and they'll still play - they're amazing!!!!!'

No they are fucking not. They're total shit and worst ripoff ever foisted on the long-suffering public by the music industry. Illegal downloads are just karmic payback, you utter cunts...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:05, Reply)

One day you'll get so angry that
your entire head, brain and all, will explode all over your keyboard in a great big bloody mess... we will know when this day has arrived by your lack of a response when someone mentions David Bowie.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:12, Reply)

Remember the alien chap in Men in Black.
He get's his head blown off and grows another one.

That's how I see Monty.
( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:15, Reply)

I think you might be right there
Mont probably would grow another head and it's first words would be 'BOWIEEEEEEEEEEE'.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:18, Reply)

The thing is, in my daily life
I'm genuinely not known for being an angry miserablist. You poor buggers get it all. I'm sorry, I really am.


*paints a picture of a lovely rainbow*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:22, Reply)

Aww a lovely rainbow
that's nice!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:26, Reply)

What's the red made of though?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:37, Reply)

Good point
*ponders*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:39, Reply)

'Blood of Bowie'
Would be it's name if it were a paint.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Ha! Beat me to it!
Damn you, 'working for a living'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:47, Reply)

As opposed to
'lying on bed, pretending to do work.'
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:48, Reply)

the blood of David Bowie
extracted from his eye with a screwdriver.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:47, Reply)

I'm surprised they've hung about as long as they have
The minidisc certainly got killed off quickly enough once the mp3 started to grow.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:14, Reply)

They have no merit whatsoever
They sound shit.
They look shit.
The sleeves are too fucking small.
They scratch really, really easily.


....but hey! They cost 0.000001p each to make, unlike records.

BRILLIANT!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:25, Reply)

I loved my minidisc player
It was indestructible, no matter how many times I trod on it
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:34, Reply)

All of it
I'm useless with technology, I get frustrated easily and cop a strop if something doesn't work and the instructions don't make sense and that button doesn't work and why isn't it printing, look it should send but it doesn't, why won't you fucking bluetooth to my laptop you sodding thing? give me back my channels fucking digital box etc etc etc and it all ends in tears.

I was actually banned from having Meccano when I was younger, due to the inevitable tantrums that would occur because i'm a cack handed spazzbot

Although one of my mates is so bad at shuffling cards we call him clawhands, so at least i'm not the biggest retard in my social circle
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:20, Reply)

I couldn't even skip
So you could imagine the state of me when people started getting into computer games.
I suspect that I may be dyspraxic.

EDIT: I mean with ropes. I was ok at tra-la-la skipping. I'm not THAT disabled...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:26, Reply)

Aww, it was such a better image before the edit

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Haha shut it, Mumble

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:34, Reply)

This beats DiT's response yesterday

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Which one was that?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:01, Reply)

The one that was full of taking too long and epic fail.

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:03, Reply)

I can't remember
You made it sound like Ronnie Corbett's bit in the chair.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:07, Reply)

I like the idea of tra-la-la skipping
How the fuck you couldn't skip with a rope and still perform a dance routine at Dit and Flim Flam's party is beyond me.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:36, Reply)

Aaah but I was freestyling!
I was not bound by rules or ropes or timing or the need for grace or balance.
(You will recall that a lot of my dancing was done whilst lay on the floor)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:37, Reply)

And very entertaining it was too
I demand a ticket for when you've got your residency at Vegas
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:44, Reply)

damn you and your parties
*shakes fists*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 15:52, Reply)

if I ever have a party you're invited
(but I'm more of an attendee than a thrower)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:01, Reply)

very kind
the distance is the killer though. Costs quite a bit to get to b3tan locations from all the way down here.

Which is why everyone should come to the bash at Easter in Cornwall
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:03, Reply)

It's bloody expensive to get to Cornwall from Liverpool
However, I did say last year that I wanted to visit Cornwall and Devon...
So yes, I'm in.
Who else from here is going? I don't know /talk people.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:06, Reply)

there's a few you will know
www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/19174
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:07, Reply)

I bet rosalicious isn't REALLY going...
But hmmm, looks promising.
But I'm also scared. I ain't never been to no bash.
And what in god's name would I tell my family!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:11, Reply)

haha
tell them you are going to devon to meet your BFF ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Of course!!!
"We met at primary school. You do remember him. He was from Birkenhead but spoke like a farmer..."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

I speak properloik
don't have a devon accent :-P
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:16, Reply)

Do you eat creemed roice?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:17, Reply)

I know how they make it so creamy
that goes for the custard as well
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:21, Reply)

blaaaaaaaaaarrgh

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:22, Reply)

que?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:23, Reply)

Made me feel a bit sick

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:32, Reply)

it's creamy for a good reason
not a disgusting one :-P
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:35, Reply)

We only have your word for it

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:38, Reply)

I'm the one who knows
well, me and everyone else who has lived in Devon for long enough.

I still eat it. does that help?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:41, Reply)

I'm not fussy on either of them really

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:44, Reply)

fair enough

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Double cream is well better
in all food situations
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:49, Reply)

What's with the continuous references to rosalicious not attending bashes?
Me confused.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:12, Reply)

That's what they say...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:15, Reply)

Now that it's pointed out
She's attending the Canada bash AND Dr When's Birmingham bash. I smell a rat.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:31, Reply)

I'd love a residency somewhere :(
A person shouldn't love attention as much as I do. I dunno how you all put up with me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 16:00, Reply)