Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Good morning /OTMy beloved boss has decided that, as I work here late by myself, I should text him when I leave the office, so he knows I’m not dead on company property. It’s health and safety gone mad, but he probably wants the opportunity to have my leaking corpse removed before it stains the new carpets.
What dull and uninteresting rules do you have to follow at work / place of study, that just make your life that bit more of a burden?
Alt Q: I have a cold and a headache. Which remedy do you follow, that you know doesn’t work?
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:19,
218 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
Heroic amounts of Vitamin C for the coldCan't help with the headache though, they just have to bugger off in their own time. Stay off the crack for a couple of days and you'll be fine.
My workplace is pretty relaxed, but their insistence that I come here every weekday is quite grating.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:28, Reply)
I could work from home, but my boss doesn't like it.It makes the office look empty.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:31,
Reply)
Either you're the only person in your officeOr you're ridiculously fat
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:33, Reply)
Just get rid of the either / or bit, and you're correct.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:34,
Reply)
Also, honey lemon tea if your throat is hurting.and Vicks Vapo drops.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:30, Reply)
Oooooh, this^If you can grate a little ginger into the tea it helps as well
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:33, Reply)
My symptoms keep coming and going.Sunday, massive headache. Monday, snotty. Tuesday, Sore throat. Today, all of them.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:33,
Reply)
You’ll end up with a prolapsed arse come midday and the sickening realisation that it wasn’t a cold after all, it’s arse cancer.(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:40,
Reply)
I like to cover most eventualities(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:44,
Reply)
Don't say that.I'm expecting the call to have my prostate checked anytime. I really don't want the finger.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:42,
Reply)
Oh dear, what if you get an erection as a result?You won't know where to look : /
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:46,
Reply)
I can't see what is erotic about checking my prostate for cancer.Either for tester or testee.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:49,
Reply)
Well, medically speakingthe male G-spot is located within the anus. I can't give you any better directions than that. See the Seann William Scott's milking scene in 1999 sub-American Pie gross-out comedy Road Trip for further details
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:57, Reply)
I don't reckon it would be that erotic thoughwomen don't enjoy smear tests. And mine went wrong and she was messing around down there for 20 minutes. None of this was erotic or remotely enjoyable.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:12,
Reply)
Yes but we don't have appendages that can move even if you don't want them to.(
girlinthehole, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:15,
Reply)
Oh yeah I didn't think about thathahaha unlucky blokes!
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:31,
Reply)
get a high-end callgirl in a tightfitting latex nurses uniform to do itmakes the whole thing much less of a chore.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:54,
Reply)
I don't think I could get one to commute to Luton.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:55,
Reply)
Isn't that just fingering his bumhole as opposed to a medical checking of his prostate(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:56,
Reply)
depends how much you spendthere's a point where "private healthcare" and "specialist hooker" meet.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:57,
Reply)
The alternative lyrics to that Craig David song "Seven Days".(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:47,
Reply)
I just neck loads of cold and flu tablets till it goes away.And I find whinging about it helps a lot plus I'm quite healthy so I don't get them for long.
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girlinthehole, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:39,
Reply)
This is what I'm doing, especially the whinging.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:44,
Reply)
Hot water, whisky and lemon juice.... love the stuff.Day two of Bad Guts and I'm OH WOE IS ME'ing, I got some treatment at the hospital today that'll fix it for the next 2 months or soo though, and I've done some pretty good work at home so it's not the end of the world, just a bit gutting that I really want to go into work but can't leave the flat at the moment. Sometimes I really fucking hate being a sicko.
Even with the pizza last night I only had 2 slices 'cus I can't really eat much when I'm like this.
This sucks the big time, but at least in a couple of days I'll be fixed for a while and can go back to being awesome and enjoying my life again.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:42,
Reply)
I'm going to do this when I get home,I'll have to get some cheap scotch though, I'm not wasting the Oban on it.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:47,
Reply)
With the stuff I put in whiskys, I really can't tell the differance. The only one I like neat is Glava, which I don't think is 100% whisky/whiskey/scotch/whatever.Oddly enough ASDA Value Whisky, like proper tramp juice stuff at £6/liter, is quite nice once you've plonked in the coke.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:48,
Reply)
Cheers man.I called them up today with my ideas and they seem really excited by them, so I think it's all good. Worst comes to it, I can hold my head up high and say I did all the right things that are in my power... including phoning them today instead of just emailing.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:49,
Reply)
As an employer myself, I can confirm that phoning makes a geat deal of difference.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:54,
Reply)
I'm shit when it comes to phones, it's a lolmental thing with me, espesh if my head is in a bad way.But over the last few months I've really pulled my act together and started phoning when I should.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:59,
Reply)
I hope you'll be better for Sunday Sushi(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:27,
Reply)
You just try and stop me !I'm ALL up in that buisness.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:50,
Reply)
Morning!Despite the fact I can get the job done regardless, work's insistence that I don't have b3ta open all day is clearly a minority position, if OT is anything to go by.
PS. A little alarming to wake up, turn on the monitor and see the b3ta Message Sent! with no memory of gazzing.
Apparently I get philanthropic when I'm hammered.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:42,
Reply)
I am nursing an epic red wine and cognac hangover todayI want to die but had a lovely evening in exchange, so 'fair enough', I say.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:47,
Reply)
For every positive action there is a negative re-action.I think Buddha said that.
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girlinthehole, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:50,
Reply)
I think you'll find it was Newton.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:51,
Reply)
I'm too slow today, it seems.I think I'm still a mite tiddly.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:52,
Reply)
And I was being condescending.Morning!
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:54,
Reply)
You don't know where Joanna's ex is?He seems to have flounced = (
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:57,
Reply)
Is that what it is?It's just confusing me and making me think I've missed something massive. And making me think he's mental.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:00, Reply)
I thought it was a comedy gold post on QOTWThe bitterness really shone through with him.
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:02,
Reply)
What was it?Or has it been deleted?
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:03,
Reply)
Another tragic case of post deletion = ((I've left his payoff line as a tribute on QOTW
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:05,
Reply)
Jura 10 year single malt in my caseon the plus side I have the afternoon off, just have to get there first.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:55,
Reply)
I like Jura a lot.There's just the one distillery on the island, is there not?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:57,
Reply)
I like the 'Bert Special'(the 15-year old Bowmore)
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:07,
Reply)
Took me a few seconds but i got there in the end.Rumour is he prefers an 8 year old Grouse.
Last night I was retrieving my suit, as I have an interview today, and in the pocket was a miniature of some 15 year old Glenfiddich that I was given at the wedding of a good friend a few months back and forgotten about. I took this as a sign of good luck and will drink said miniature when, not if, I get the job!
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:14, Reply)
My sausage fingers accidentally pressed enter, before I had finished typing.(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:18, Reply)
I was mightily confused for a moment.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:20,
Reply)
Best of luck with the interview.I know how much you hate your current job.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:19,
Reply)
Mate, it would be like a series of cosmic blowjobs, administered in the back of a Honda AccordReplete with a full leather interior, polished chrome bumpers and full neon bodykit.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:25, Reply)
I think it is going to be very positive.I only completed the phone interview yesterday and they wanted to interview this very afternoon. However, it does mean I have to get changed into mt suit, in my car, in an NCP car park, then hot foot it up to the interview, trying not to work up too much of a sweat en route. The reason being, I couldn't turn up in here in a suit as they would be onto me, and they don't take kindly to one of their 'commodities' doing a runner.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:38, Reply)
Get changed in a 'male sauna'(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:41,
Reply)
I've been banned from the ones up hereAfter acting out the 'fire extinguisher' scene from Irreversible
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)
That's why you should turn up to work in a suit every so oftenjust to keep them on their toes.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
TrueIn fact if and when I had my notice period in, i may wear a suit every day. Complete with ear to ear grin.....and semi
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
This does work.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post916294
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:52,
Reply)
I'm maxed out on the parrots at the moment.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:54,
Reply)
Forms! Forms and spreadsheets for every tiny little thing that we bloody doAny time anyone says "what should I do about this" the office manager goes "let's make a form to fill in".
FFS.
For the headache thing I drink loads and loads of water to try and avoid taking ibuprofen. Then I give up and take ibuprofen. For the cold I drink lemsip and eat sweet chilli crisps. Makes me feel better for about half an hour. But I only get about 1 cold a year because I'm like Wolverine or something.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:55,
Reply)
Massive sideburns?(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:56,
Reply)
it's the sideburnsedit: mindpiss
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:56,
Reply)
I wish I could get my hair to do thateven if the price was massive sideburns.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:22,
Reply)
I was just thinking the same thing.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:15,
Reply)
that is his normal attitude(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:20,
Reply)
I am of the opinion that it is indeed quite delicious.Good morning my dear Monty.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:21,
Reply)
I think she's actually trying to tell us she's been lying about her ageShe's really 124
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:58, Reply)
well you'll just look silly when the B3ta Justice League assembles and you're the only one in a Hawkwind Tshirt.(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:34,
Reply)
I'm sure I'll cope with the embarrassment somehow.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:37,
Reply)
you probably have a much higher shame threshold than mostI highly doubt all your drug addled escapades have ended with you returning home, brushing your teeth, removing your clothes and placing them carefully in the washing basket, putting on your pyjamas and then retiring to bed to snooze the remaining hours of the afternoon away.
In case it wasn't clear I'm implying you've probably, at one stage or another, woken up in a train station covered in your or someone else's bodily fluids of unspecified origin
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:43,
Reply)
Nonsense.I never lose control when I get high. I lose entire days, and hundreds of pounds, but never my dignity.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:45,
Reply)
You have a set of three one-foot long bone claws, on both hands, enhanced with adamantium, used primarily for slashing, puncturing, and grappling?(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:09,
Reply)
You're stupid, gay and fictionaland rather embarrassingly adults who should know better are 'into you'?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:14,
Reply)
It's much better than that, I read some a couple of weeks ago and enjoyed them.Try it, you might just like it.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:26, Reply)
That was the slogan for Typhoo Q-Tea, the instant powdered tea.And look how well that did.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:27,
Reply)
Did it spawn a number of Tv-series and a number of very sucessful films?(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)
Elton Johnhas sold 85 zillion records. This does not in any way prevent him from being completely fucking shit and a disgrace to humanity.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:36,
Reply)
I still have my 2000AD collection to feast uponI suppose Sandman was quite good /nerds
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:30,
Reply)
I'd totally forgotten about the Wolverine nuditymust rent that film.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:21,
Reply)
Your "Do you get to see his bum and everything?"was one of the classier things I heard you say that night.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:30, Reply)
Oh I wasn't that bad!Applez is the one who doesn't know how to use her indoor voice.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:35,
Reply)
Is it a comic about post-op transsexuals?EDIT: All the characters are 'ex-men'? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:22,
Reply)
I'm with you on that, out of all the superhero films, x-men are my fave.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:55,
Reply)
Back when I was at uniI was using some glue in one of our workshops one day that works by melting 2 pieces of plastic, then when they dry they're attached. I got stopped half way through and told that I had to put on safety goggles and gloves. Moreover, plastic safety goggle and plastic gloves. Strangely, the lab tech didn't seem to understand why I was disagreeing with this rule.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 8:56, Reply)
Sounds like polystyrene cement.Does this mean I have to start using goggles when I do the Airfix thing.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:05,
Reply)
I have to go in.My joy de vivre is strangely lacking at the moment.
Alt: Manning the fuck up and convalescing.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:02,
Reply)
I could show him when I log off from B3ta, to prove I'm not bunking off.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:07,
Reply)
I have shifted my cold by staying up latedrinking rum, and smoking spliffs
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:06,
Reply)
I started to think it was drinking that gave me the headache.But I'm happy now I'm sure it isn't.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:10,
Reply)
I'm not allowed to use my mobile during work hours (minus lunch), I'm not allowed to eat at my desk.Standard rules, surely?
Difference is that I'm the only member of staff in the office they apply to. Retarded, isn't it?
Also, I'm suffering from last night, we created the "Ultra Mel". 4 shots of JD, 330ml bottle of crabbies, a fuckload of ice, and about a full lime, we then topped up this concoction with some more fiery Ginger Ale. Fucking lovely.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:09,
Reply)
we're not allowed to listen to music through headphones at work any moreI still do anyway because some parts of my job are almost impossible to do while being distracted by the fucking inane drivel spouted by most of the people in my office.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:18,
Reply)
It is amazing how much more you can get don't when you done have mongjuice dribbling in your ear(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:19, Reply)
it really isI have to do a lot of repetitive stuff during certain stages of making a hydraulic model and I just can't keep my mind on it enough to do it quickly if I don't have music on
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:21,
Reply)
we can't all work in the exciting daredevil world of cardboard boxeryI'm aware this will be a moot argument after Friday
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:37,
Reply)
From the 8th it's the exciting world of bathrooms! OOOH U-BENDTASTIC(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:41,
Reply)
ooh will you be selling those taps that make the water come out in a waterfall and shine blue if it's cold or red if it's hot?(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:44,
Reply)
most likelyand waterproof TVs
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:47,
Reply)
All the men are illHave you all been having gay orgies? Whatevs people I don't care.
I only have three days of work left. Motivation: zero.
My exit interview is later which should be delightful and not at all a total and utter waste of time
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:30,
Reply)
What the fuck is an exit interview?(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:31,
Reply)
A big waste of timeor part of quality assurance monitoring of the company
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:36,
Reply)
^thisYou sit in a room with the HR manager and on this ocassion my manager and they say things like "oh why are you leaving?" "what can the company improve on?" "would you recommend working here to a friend?"
Then after you leave they throw it away
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:39,
Reply)
'I'm leaving because you're all cunts''you could improve the company by killing yourself'
etc
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:42,
Reply)
Someone who used to work hereUtterly laid in to the guy doing their exit interview. I obviously don't know the full details (confidentiality and all that), but I do know that this person had some very unsavory things to say about a few of the managers.
Quite ballsy of them too, considering they'd been defrauding the company and producing shit work for years.
Bridges were well and truly burnt.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:50,
Reply)
Better to be nice - you never know when you may need a reference from them in future.(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)
I'm going to aim answer all the questions in five words or less(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:46,
Reply)
try and fit as many memes in as possible(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
Weigh that against the utter joy of telling them what you really think(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:06,
Reply)
Are you trying to be amusing?Or is this some kind of old man reference I won't get as I am not as old as you?
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:40,
Reply)
oh my god ure liek so mean on teh INTERNETZ(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:44,
Reply)
Encouraging people to kill themselves on a messageboard is just wrongI'm saddened
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:44,
Reply)
HahaThe other day I told someone "You were born a 45 year old civil servent who's spent the last 10 years making sure a meter of tarmac on the M25 still hasn't crumbled yet".
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:45,
Reply)
A friend of mine works for the civil service. One of her colleagues wears slippers at work everyday and does nothing.Apparently he is "too expensive to get rid of" as he has been there nearly 20 years and they don't have the budget to make him redundant. Ridiculous.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
This doesn't apply to everyone who works in goverment jobs, but it does for a lot of them...... that the only reason those jobs exist and those rolls are filled, is so they can tick boxes such as disabled/minority/single-parents/etc. I think the worst bit is that a lot of them simply just don't care eaither way and might as well have all the emotional and work ethics of a 15 year old on work experiance at McDonalds in his summer holidays.
The trouble is when you get people really high up with that attitude.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:52,
Reply)
i intend to employ a bi-sexual black one legged humpbacked Albanian woman with 6 kids and no husband to fill all these requirements in one employee.She will be known in the office as The Token.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
I like the fact that I miss-read that as "Tolken", as in, the lord of the rings guy, as that sounds like one of his characters.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:00,
Reply)
I'm not illJust awesome.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:45,
Reply)
OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN =DDDD/ac
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:46,
Reply)
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Last Sunday I kept having little moments of "I'M MOVING TO LONDON NEXT WEEK!!!"
Even wooks looked excited at one point
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:47,
Reply)
That was trapped wind(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:50,
Reply)
also, he is moving to Leamington(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
It's going to be awesome on so many levels !(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:53,
Reply)
I KNOWZ!I was going to invite lab to stay but now I'm not as he is mean
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:54,
Reply)
No sushi for Labs; gutted.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:57,
Reply)
Very sadface :((
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:00,
Reply)
Shouldn't be nice to everyone EXCEPT me(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:01,
Reply)
Hold up a sec here....The more people, the more pieces of sushi, the more I get to try.
Labs: Do you like the tuna/squid/[other bits I don't like]... and dislike the prawn/crab/roe bits that I love? 'cus if that's the case, then we could totally work something out.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:16,
Reply)
Gonz, you've got me for that stuff buddy.I'm not a massive fan of eating things with more limbs than me.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:20, Reply)
Obviously I'm not counting tentacles as limbs so I can still have the squid.I am aware that this is stupid.
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:21, Reply)
OH MAN !I think raw squid is the only thing, sushi wise, that I couldn't bring myself to swallow. I like calamari, but raw squid/octopus really isn't my scene.
You crotching down me yard this sunday? I reckon maybe if you all fancy it after sushi we could watch a flick and eat cake 'round mine, something scary for 'ween.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:24,
Reply)
I'm not sure what crotching down your yard means, I'm afraid.And post-sushi depends on the time - got to get all the way across London after all, so I have to be on my way fairly early :(
(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)
I have to take one set of safe keys home each night then return with them each morning while the boss is off.This is ridiculous and unsafe.
I forgot last night, and had to walk all the way back to work and home again in the dark with the frigging safe keys. Security at its best.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:44,
Reply)
Why don't you just put them on yoru house keys?(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:45,
Reply)
Because they are used by lots of different people during the dayso have to be available and hanging on the hook until about 5.30pm
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:47,
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When I was the alarm notification person at workthey would ring me at 2am to say the alarm was going off at the office. What the fuck am I really going to do about it at 2am? I was expected to go to the office and find out if it's a false alarm, but at 2am I don't really want to be faced with someone actually burgling the office.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:46,
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EggzacklyThey assume you're going to switch off a false alarm, but the alternative is a no-way-Jose.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:47,
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If I had to get up and go to a shop at 2am and found someone thereI would cunt them in the fuck and tell them to have the decency to burgle people at a reasonable hour as some people aren't thieving cuntbags and have to GET UP IN THE MORNING
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:49,
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You are: 'hard in the boys' showers'.Why is never a male B3tan who unwittingly sets themselves up for this gag?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:56,
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I'd like to think I would do thisbut in reality I think I would squeak and run away
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:00,
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Playing dead is one of nature's greatest survival tools.I would do that.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:05,
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I'm one of them, here.I live over an hour away from my work. Imbeciles.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:48,
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There was a dodgy connection over Christmas last year and I had to go down there 5 timesThen it happened again, but I was drunk so I just didn't bother and no one even noticed, I felt so underappreciated.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:01,
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i am a teacherI am CONSTANTLY given more things I have to do that make my life a bit more of a burden. Lists, reports, welsh assembly demands to put unrelated things into the curriculum(ffs, I have to include 'welsh culture' - I plan to get them to pledge allegiance to the welsh flag at the start of each lesson).
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:54,
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Must be really difficult to fit that in to a 36 week working year. My heart bleeds for you. Really.(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
oh, don't start. PleaseI have to work through most of the holidays and during the week I work in the evenings.
Admittedly I love my job, but after how crazy stress the last 6 weeks have been, I have little patience for peoples' 'you get a shit load of holidays' argument
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 9:59,
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I'm the wrong person to give you any sympathy. I haven't had more than a 72 hour break at any one time since August 2008.(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:00, Reply)
I'm not asking for sypathy at allI'm just fed up of that argument/put down
you should take more holiday, though, how the hell have you ended up like that? Self-employment?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:02,
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I set up a company in 2008. I don't have the time, money or trust to take any time off. I am about to hire a new planning director that I hope to be able to trust to run things whilst I take some time off. .(, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:07, Reply)
ah, I seeI ran a little business for a while (nothing like yours sounds) but you just CAN'T leave them. Good luck with the time off, otherwise you'll burn out
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:08,
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I have friends who are teachers and I understand completely.(
girlinthehole, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:00,
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When my father taught at Winchesterhe got SIX MONTHS OFF A YEAR.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:02,
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It's not so much the workload I have sympathy with but the fact they have to spend every working day with children.(
girlinthehole, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:04,
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I would make a shit school teacherkids are annoying
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:05,
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Depends what kind of teacher you areI have a friend who teaches at college and I know he's busy and hardworking and so whilst we rib him about having it easy we know he doesn't.
I have another friend who works in a high school and he has the easiest fucking life ever. He complains when he has to work until 5pm, so it's him that makes people complain about how easy teachers have it. However, it's always the ones who work the least who complain the most. *cough* BOBBY *cough*
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:03,
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college lecturerit's brilliant, but very intense. Also, all the students are at the age of having constant criseses, which you tend to have to deal with in some form
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:05,
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..by laughing at them and punching some fucking sense into them.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:06,
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I wishI use sarcasm as my main weapon
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 10:07,
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