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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Shopping style
Now that Christmas is almost here...

I usually think about the presents I'm going to buy to everybody for months, trying to make sure I'm getting them the right thing, then go online and buy them all in a couple of hours.

Mark takes a whole day off to go around the shops, without knowing what he's buying until he sees something that he knows it's for that someone.

My mother asks around or directly to the person who's going to receive the present, to make sure she's got it right.

What type of shopper are you?

Alt Q.: Why would you hate Christmas? Winter is the saddest season, but with the lights, the holidays and the celebration everything seems a bit happier.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:41, 222 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I like the winter.
I hate christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)
But, but, but
Winter is awful, but without Christmas it'd be even worse, wouldn't it?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)
No.
It's ok when there are kids in the family and you see their little faces light up on Christmas morning, other than that it's annoying and tiring.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:47, Reply)
I don't see how
People around you is happy, doesn't that make you happy?

And it'd be all dark without the Christmas lights too.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)
Nobody I know gets happier at christmas.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
I do - so you're wrong

(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
only because Christmas makes it acceptable to drink in the mornings.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
Christmas and festivals
I do like an excuse to start drinking at 9am.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
At glastonbury this year on two consecutive days my mate said
"why the fuck are all the bars closed" before 10am.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:09, Reply)
Travelling is also an excuse to drink at any time

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:19, Reply)
this!
I was in the airport at 7am last year and we were like "is it too early for a JD?"
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:34, Reply)
Ok
Nobody I know apart from Abs and Al get happier at Christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
Well...
Mark gets happy at Christmas too (if only recently, since I started spreading the virus)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:00, Reply)
^ This ^
My usual excuse at Christmas not to see the family is "I'm working"; they know it's a lie, but it's more polite than "I hate the sodding day."
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:02, Reply)
And me

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:19, Reply)
I had a dream last night that you and DJTP
had opened up a vintage shop in London. Maybe it was a premonition.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:23, Reply)
That would be ace.
You could have a corset corner.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 11:12, Reply)
I like new year best

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:21, Reply)
I do get happy
I'm sure more people does, too. At work, or your neighbours... sure you must know someone who loves it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:00, Reply)
This
I hate Christmas.

I'm also a terrible shopper. Last time I was on Oxford Street on a Saturday I lasted 20 minutes before hightailing it out of there and seeking solstace in a bar.

*shudder*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)
Never go shopping on Oxford Street at christmas
unless you know what you need, and then you never walk on Oxford Street, you use the back entrances of the shops and walk on the adjacent roads.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

the shops and walk on the adjacent roads men
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
I knew someone would do that

(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

that a man up the arse
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
I'm not planning to.
Everyone in my family is getting a tub of Crisco.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
Summer solstace or winter solstace?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:20, Reply)
You need a nice man like me to wake you up on christmas day with smoke salmon and scrambled eggs on toast
a nice cup of tea, some bucks fizz, and huge box containing your ideal present.

My wife is very lucky.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:45, Reply)
NO
Christmas breakfast is ham and mustard on toast, with orange juice, followed by irish coffee.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)
NO
Christmas Breakfast is an Extra Dry Martini.

Heathens.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
Dry Martini is only for use with the phrase
let's get you out of those wet clothes and into a dry Martini
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
yeah hopefully so much sex ensues that you don't actually get round to drinking the Martini
because Martini is blarg.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
Or all of the above
It is Christmas after all
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
WHAT!
That's fucking wrong at the best of times, let alone for breakfast, and let alone at christmas.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)

That's You're
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
why do so many people have a problem with ham on toast?
you are all fucking freaks. it's amazing
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)
Christmas breakfast is toast and chocolates with fizz or even buckssss fizzzz

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:21, Reply)

ssss fizzzz fast
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:28, Reply)
Christmas breakfast I'm planning a Full English
but growing up it was bucks fizz and some toast.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:42, Reply)
That's so sweet!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
What can I say, I'm a wonderful guy.

(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
Find me someone as wonderful as you are pleasethankyou.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
Should be easy enough, there's a skag-addled tramp outside the office I could ask if you like?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:07, Reply)
Woohoo!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:08, Reply)
The last thing I want to listen to whilst eating my Christmas breakfast
is 'Making Your Mind Up'. Man, you are SO bent.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
No, Christmas would be "Land of Make Believe"
Argh, now that's stuck in my head.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:43, Reply)
I'm gonna marry a gal just like you one day.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:27, Reply)
This.
I hate Christmas, but I love all the winter stuff that goes with it, like the food markets in Manchester and the ice rink and all the pretty lights and stuff.

I hate Christmas because it's supposed to be a religious festival and I don't follow that religion. It also bugs me that it's rammed down everyone's throats regardless of whether you're interested or not. And if you dare to express that you dislike Christmas everyone thinks you're a misery guts without a soul.

I also don't like the idea of 'santa'. I hate that we all have to engage in this huge lie. If I have children I don't ever want to lie to them about anything.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
I fucking love the market in Albert Square in manchester
you get the hot wine stall and all sorts, I really miss that place.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:02, Reply)
yeah that's easily the best thing about Christmas
drinking hot blueberry wine and getting noms from the carvery place.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:09, Reply)
Go on, try it.
The "not lying to kids" I mean.

It's impossible. Well, it's possible, but they will grow up mentally scarred
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:03, Reply)
I understand that when they ask certain questions you should sugar coat the truth
but when I found out Santa didn't exist I was really pissed off with the adults, who I'd trusted, for making up such a load of bullshit and I don't want my kids to feel like that.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:11, Reply)
Really?
how old were you when you found out, then?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)
21
I can't remember when I found out, 8 or 9 maybe, but my sister and I had suspected for a while because the letters from 'Santa' were written in my Dad's handwriting.

We still got a pillowcase full of presents each though, so we weren't bothered. I'm 28 now, and I still get my sack of extra gifts, though mostly they tend to be socks, boxers, a work shirt, aftershave and Haribo.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:18, Reply)
my mum never bothered with all that crap about letters to Santa, etc,
or the "if you're not good Santa won't bring you presents". When I was older she admitted that she was annoyed that she had to pretend this magical being delivered the presents when she was the one queuing up in Toys R Us for 3 hours in the snow haha
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:26, Reply)
my parents told me they bought stuff
but santa was the one to deliver it because it was more magic that way. If I ever breed, this is the story I will use
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)
yeah I suppose that's acceptable.
I don't want to be an uber bitch and ruin the 'magic' that Christmas holds for children, but I also want to educate them about what Christmas is really supposed to be about. I'll probably be a terrible mother.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:35, Reply)
the alternative is the implication that poor kids
must be naughty (because santa didn't get them anything). I was the kind of kid that would have asked about this so this is probably why that version of the story occurred
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:37, Reply)
about 5 or 6 I think
my sister woke up when my mum was in the room and my mum hates it too so she just went "oh well, guess you know now then!" and so the next morning my sister told me immediately. This is one of my earliest memories as well!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)
The Christmas German Market in Birmingham is awesome
But it's always packed. Nice to get hot wine and a massive, strikethrough-baiting sausage.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:10, Reply)

strikethroughmaster

will that do?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:17, Reply)
That'll do

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:19, Reply)
pig

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:35, Reply)
lying to kids is awesome

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:16, Reply)
I remember reading a QOTW answer where someone said they babysat for kids
and just lied about everything and I have to admit I proper officelolled at it.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:27, Reply)
There's an IceRink???
oh I might have to go there!
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)
yeah!
There's a temporary outdoor ice rink every Christmas, it should be up when you're here.

www.spinningfieldsicerink.com/siteNorm/tickets.php
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)
i like christmas when I have time off
when you work in a shop you spend 3 months working your ass off and people being rude to you, then christmas eve you put up the january sale signs and get one day off
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:20, Reply)
yeah I always feel sorry for retail people when they have to work almost the whole way through the Christmas holidays
and having to then deal with the January sales, urgh.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:37, Reply)
I hope I never have to again
boxing day is miserable. It's just people bringing back numerous copies of the latest celebrity autobiography (well, in the bookshop it was)

also, hangovers and the reek of disappointment
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Last year I was mega poor
so made everyone foody presents for about £1.50 per person ish.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)
That's a great idea
Between Mark and I we only give each other handmade presents, as Christmas shouldn't be about getting expensive things. I need to start preparing his present for this year.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)
I bet they thought you were a douchebag
and regretted buying you expensive things from John Lewis.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
Not everyone's families hate them Kitty.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
I used to be the favourite
now I'm not and it's cold.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
Haha
But she's right. I couldn't do that with my sister. When I tell her what Mark and I do, she says we're just cheap and crappy.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)
Winter is fucking ace.
Snow. Therefore skiing. All else does not matter. I can take or leave Christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)
It's ace
if you're on holidays. If you have to go to work and the road is full of ice and snow, it's not so cool.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:45, Reply)
I made sugar and cinnamon almonds,
chilli salted cashews. And a few other bits.
I might do the same again this year but with more expensive stuff.
You can get the ingredients from the supermarket rather than the proper shops which I tend to avoid from about now until february.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
those sound good
how did you go about it?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
chilli cashews are a piece of piss.
bunch of chopped chillis in olive oil over night then the next day fry unsalted cashews in the oil in small batches until they're brown toss them in rock salt.
I'll try to find the sugar almond recipe.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
nice one
thanks
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
I did this with pumpkin seeds last Halloween
and they were lovely! Gonna make a pumpkin pie on Sunday as I've never had one
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:07, Reply)
Gaz me if you want a decent recipe
(assuming you haven't already found one)
(berk, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:10, Reply)
Thanks
(You wanted to reply above, I imagine...)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
omg, I never fuck up like that normally.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
I understand you were excited
It's a good recipe. I might do a few of those for Mark, and something else.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
it just looked like they had gone on to talk about something else and you were all
NO, I NEED MORE VALIDATION ON MY AWESOME GIFT GIVING SKILLS
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)
Hello kitty

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:16, Reply)
Fuck off Psychochomp

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:27, Reply)
What have I done to insult you this morning?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:28, Reply)
When I said hello to you on facebook
this was your response.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:37, Reply)
learn to drive on ice and snow.
laugh at the other fuckwits in the hedges and stuck on the roads.

profit.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
I have to take the train
Which gets delayed all the time, and then walk for 20min on the ice. It's not fun.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
It took me twice as long last winter to walk to work
because the ice was so bad. Although the streets were pretty deserted so I got to play 'zombie apocalypse'.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:28, Reply)
CHRISTMAS IS FUCKING SHIT
Forced to spend money on and spend time with family you don't like.
Christmas food (mince pies, christmas pudding etc) is horrid.
Having to attend a work Christmas party/dinner with a bunch of cunts you hate.
It is isolating for the lonely, homeless etc.
Plus the average person in the UK consumes around 10,000 calories on Christmas day apparently, which is obscene.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)
Well, do it different, then
Take the time off to go somewhere nice. Only give hand made presents. Don't overindulge yourself. And some of the Christmas food is great.

The lonely and homeless get special treatment and food in Christmas too. It might sound stupid, but I'm sure they're grateful that it happens at least 1 day a year.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)
I have ran a homeless shelter in London for the last 9 years from the 23rd to the 30th. Not doing it this year which will feel weird.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
And don't you think they felt happy and grateful?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
90% do. The other 10% are cunts.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
So
It's not all bad about Christmas for the lonely and homeless, is it?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
As a homeless person you're isolated to an extent regardless.
Christmas provides a period of introspection on what they perceive to be their failures and also reminds them that they are separated from family
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
So
That time of restrospection might help them to realize where their problems are and try to solve them. Or you are telling me that because there are some very unlucky people in the world we all should be moody and unhappy all the time, not to offend them?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:07, Reply)
No I am saying that Christmas makes lonely and isolated people often feel worse - the bigger and more hyped Christmas is the worse it makes these people feel.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)
I daresay 10% of people (at least)
are cunts at Christmas whether they are homeless or not...
(berk, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
Very true.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
99%. All year round.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
Well if you do insist on living in London.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:10, Reply)
whereas it's 100% in Milton Cunting Keynes.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:14, Reply)
this.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
Not the ones he rapes, no.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)
Tramp rape. Best of all the rapes.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:06, Reply)
I love consuming by own bodyweight in turkey
and I love christmas pudding and mince pies, especially the pies mrs al makes, and I like my work mates so the christmas dinner is great fun.

So HA!
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
That is one big fucking turkey!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)

obscence barely even trying.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)
Just to be clear
Christmas is not 'nearly here'. It's just under 2 months until Christmas, which is loads of time, yet I've already seen a shop putting up a Christmas tree, which almost made me cry.

Also, winter is awesome. Summer can piss right off with it's stupid sun, and making things too warm.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:45, Reply)
Selfridges did their Christmas floor move in SEPTEMBER.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)
ARGHHHH!

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
Liberty
had theirs in August, and are considering keeping it in year round.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
And that was for Christmas 2011.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:14, Reply)
That's just because they didn't want AA to know about it

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:48, Reply)
Still?
Am I ever going to be able to get away from this bastard meme?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:52, Reply)
Autumn is the best season - as you can eat loads of game.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
monopoly burger is my favorite

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Christmas music is fucking awful
just because it is Christmas does not mean it is acceptable to listen to really shit, badly written music.

I like most everything else about Christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Christmas My band's
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:47, Reply)
Normally I would agree with you
but can you really say our stuff is worse than most Christmas songs? Even in jest?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
Yes. I'm deadly serious. Your band's shit and you're a cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)
Hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)
Subtle
I like it
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)
Monty! Monty! Monty!
Can we please organise a friday night in Tayyabs please!
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)
Shit, sorry Alphonse, I need to get my shit together.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

r band's can and you're a in my mum's + with my blessing
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
HAHAHA!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
That is some convoluted but
stunning handiwork. *doffs*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)
I appreciate your honesty

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
Yeah, there you're right
The music is sickening.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:47, Reply)
You have an excuse to listen to "Fairytale of New York"
which is the greatest christmas tune of all time.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)
That's not much of a fucking achievement.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
....
greatest only non-violence inducing
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
That's like calling it
the "Least irritating genital infection"
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:04, Reply)
It's still a shit song which makes me want to smash the radio with a large, blunt instrument
(Or turn the radio off, as I normally settle for...)
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:35, Reply)
It's no 'Glen Medeiros', that's for sure.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
Nothings gonna change
that
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
I fucking hate Christmas music
All of it, with maybe a slight show of mercy towards Ring Out Solstice Bells by the mighty Jethro Tull.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:14, Reply)
Now the weather outside is frightful, but the fire inside is so delightful.... since we've got no place to go, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:24, Reply)
I buy as much as possible online
to avoid mixing with the peasantry.

Christmas is a load of old fucking bollocks. Although being a parent may change my views on this as my child gets into it all. From where I’m standing at the moment, though, the only good thing about it is the increase in ‘Best of The Two Ronnies’ repeats. And gammon.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)
I don't know
I love all the lights on the street, and that feeling that people is in general, happier.

I hate the shopping on the street, thought. I can't stand been pushed and pulled all the time.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
All those pesky immigrants, pushing and pulling you, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
ha
i just got a letter from mr tayaab of tayaaabs (i act for his landlord). shall i close it down??????
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)
excellent bribery opportunity here.
please wait until i have tried it though
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
i'm only joking
i don't have that kind of power. i can stop him changing his sign outside or something exciting.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
If you dared
I would hunt you down and punch you right in the face. And in the ovaries.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
Do that, and I shall be forced to close YOU down.
I don't want to do this. Don't make me, please.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
so you're saying you value some chargrilled meats
over me???

i see.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
I would swap my own child with Ian Huntley
for a plate of chops, a couple of seekh kebabs and some dry meat.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)
well ok
this makes me feel marginally better.

marginally.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:15, Reply)
^this.
A bit of on-line shopping and give my mum money to buy the rest for me. I don't even decorate my house.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
Ha me neither!
Wiggy got a bit upset last year and admitted that he wanted to decorate so I begrudgingly bought a little tree.

We went to his family last year so this year is my turn. We're doing nothing. No Christmas food, no Christmas TV, no Christmas stupid fucking obligations to be happy, it's going to be brilliant.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:02, Reply)
You will be doing something
Don't you see? Christmas is not about doing what the TV tells you to do. You're going to spend some quality time with family and the people you love. You'll do things together, you'll get time to talk to each other. How can that not be good?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:11, Reply)
Yes but you can do that anytime. You don't need the excuse of a the fictional birth of a fictional character to do this.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:15, Reply)
I'll be spending time with Wiggy
but I do that anyway. I'll probably go down to see my parents at some point around the 28th, but not because it's Christmas and I have to. That's one good thing about Christmas, the extra time off work.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:17, Reply)
Christmas with kids
is excellent! You will love it (though I'm sure you will be doubtful)
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)
mmm gammon

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)
SANTATRON ENGAGED!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)
ha ha ha ha

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)
YAY!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:24, Reply)
i used to love christmas
as a family we always made a massive thing out of it, and it was really brilliant. then my mum died at christmas and i can't stand any of it now, i hate christmas adverts and decorations going up in september, and i flatly refuse to wrap anybody's presents!

the worst bit was the actual year it happened, because she had already bought so much stuff and wrapped some of it but not all of it and- well. having to go through those bags of presents was something i wouldn't wish on anyone, ever. not even baldmonkey.

still, we all go to the caribbean or somewhere lovely now, and spend lots of time together, so we still have a really nice family time.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)
How awful that your mum died at Christmas.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
Yeah, but seriously, you would wish it on baldmonkey.

(Bazongaloid, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)
no i really wouldn't
because he wouldn't notice, he'd be too busy going for the ten billionth post on 4chan or something.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)
I'm sorry about that
I know how crap it is when you miss someone. But as you said, you can always do something different. Christmas is about taking some time off and spend it with the people you love. If it's on the beach or skiing; if it's with your parents or with your best friend, you decide it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)
I'm constantly around my family.
I need a couple of weeks away from them, not more time with them.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)
Then choose your best friend
I'm sure your parents will understand if you explain it properly.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:12, Reply)
They might be in Tenerife this Christmas to stay with my little sister.
So it will just be me, my other sister and nephew.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:14, Reply)
Yeah, agree.
I've never liked Xmas since i was a mercenary kid, but the old man was buried the week before, and it got worse.
Luckily he was dead, but having to sit with my mum and relatives from hell trying not to mention it, just capped it off nicely.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:10, Reply)
dreadful isn't it?
biggest elephant in the room ever.

my 3 year old niece asked me the other day where my mummy was, i was properly stumped, i'd almost rather she'd asked me about sex! (they do live in essex, so she probably already knows)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:16, Reply)

knows has more sex than me
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:17, Reply)
speak for yourself, internetboy!!!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:26, Reply)
...I'm so sad.
*cries*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:32, Reply)
knows? She could probably teach you a thing or two

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:18, Reply)
Lost my Mum just after Christmas
Her birthday was 7th January, that was a very strange day...

Quick addition: I know you're 'supposed' to take down decorations on the 5th, but we'd always leave them up until her birthday, made it seem nicer. We did it that year too, and I know my sisters still do this. It's one family tradition it's good to keep alive.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:18, Reply)
god i am sorry
it is horrendous
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)
I find sitting in my pants, swigging vodka helps.
I get on with my mum, ish, it's the rest of the bastards I can't stand.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:27, Reply)
i spend quite a lot of time
sitting in my pants swigging vodka in various bars around london
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)
JUST pants.
This is important.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:32, Reply)

important vomit inducing if you've ever met me.

*borks*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:33, Reply)
This Christmas I shall be swigging vodka out of your pants.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:44, Reply)
Mmm....crusty...

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:47, Reply)
That's my mum's birthday
I'm going to spare a thought for yours on that day from now on.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Thank you, I appreciate it

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:32, Reply)
Sorry dude, it's a bummer.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:33, Reply)
Sounds like you're presenting a child...

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)
*Sends Xmas mud baby*

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:40, Reply)
Lost my mum a week before my birthday
bitch didn't get me anything. I ask you!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:51, Reply)
I am terrible at christmas presents, it goes
step 1: plan to make lots of cool things for people
step 2: put off making things until 2 weeks before christmas
step 3: wander round shops and try and buy things, make no decisions
step 4: apologise for lack of present. Possibly will manage it before March
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:12, Reply)
Oh Aberracion, if you weren't so lovely I would internet-bitch-slap you
Your post sums up why I hate Christmas, it's not nearly here, it's TWO pigging months away. From here on in it's going to be "What's everyone doing for christmas?" and "What does everyone want for christmas?" and "What would be your perfect christmas?"...for the next 2 months.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:21, Reply)
What about lunch? What're you doing at the weekend?
Are we nearly there yet?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:24, Reply)
Christmas threads are going to make lunch & weekend threads seem like a fascinating insight into the human soul

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:26, Reply)
What are you having for lunch at the weekend?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)
how would you go about
internet bitch slapping? in fact, what does a real life bitch slap look like? i thought it was when a girl slapped you.

and i know you're not a girl!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Not sure
but it's followed by a "Oh no you di'ent!" and some side to side head movements.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)
And how do you know i'm not a girl?
Those photos I gazzed you could have been anybodys cock
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:40, Reply)
i thought you said it was a hen?
my eyes, my eyes...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:58, Reply)
I love everything to do with christmas except the day itself.
Christmas lights are awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Funnily enough I hate everything to do with christmas, bar the day itself.
Perhaps we could come to some mutually agreeable arrangement with this in mind?
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:44, Reply)
I like Christmas
It's one of the few times a year the family properly gets together, and we do all get on. Plus, my Dad cooks a massive Beef roast every year, fanfookintastic!

I'm a mixture of all 3 tbh. We do secret santa in our house now, as it's much easier that way, rather than getting a present for everyone. We usually all put money towards the kids, so they can get a decent present.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)

Dad+'s
o c
a
Beef roast every year


My head hurts now.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)
Ah, he fucked you too?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)
"Special" bathtime with daddy?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:35, Reply)
Well, he does like his bukkake

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)
God, you can tell it's Macclesfield...

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:39, Reply)
He's in Congleton, even worse!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:41, Reply)
I hate Christmas.
Well, no, I don't mind the idea of a winter festival and some time with your family. But I hate what Christmas has become. The fact that there are decorations and chocolates in shops, party invites in October and all sorts of related shit.

I'm very tempted just to find a far-flung corner of the world and ignore the holiday altogether.
(Miraclefish How appropriate, you fight like a cow, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:26, Reply)
My gym is in the basement of a hotel.
Gym has Halloween shit on the walls, go upstairs, and the fucking place has Santas everywhere.
Weird.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)
Christmas is fucking boss
what is not boss about white lights, The Two Ronnies, cheese, cold meats, port, Cherry B, Failey's, roast dinners and mini sausage rolls?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)
and those sausages with bacon round them
and that Morcame and wise episode
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)
Innit.

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)
STOP BLAMING CHRISTMAS FOR ALL THE STUFF PEOPLE DO TOO EARLY!
It's not Christmas's fault! I don't spend a ridiculous amount. I get a few thoughtful presents within my modest budget, I have fun spending time with my parents when we'd otherwise be in work, I eat like a horse and drink like a plonky. I watch boss nostalgic stuff.
Boss.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)
LEAVE BRITNEY SPEARS ALONE!!!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:39, Reply)
SHE'S NOT WELL!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 11:48, Reply)
Sounds like you and Mark have it the opposite way round to the norm...
I, for one, am a strong believer in the technique of finding out exactly what every git wants, writing it down in a concise list and spending approximately half an hour shoulder-barging my way through two or three shops to acquire the items on the list before wriggling through the crowds and into the nearest pub.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 28 Oct 2010, 10:41, Reply)

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