imagine - john lennon
I played drums in my primary school band and our teacher, a fairly big lennon fan, made us play this.

unfortunately, we were quite good - as far as primary school bands go - and kept winning competitions and that.

as a result, I must have played imagine about a dozen times a day, five days a week, for something close to two years.

of course, all that wouldn't have been so bad if it weren't for the fact that imagine was a load of trite, mawkish, shite to begin with.

I hate it to this day and, if there was ever justification for shooting a man, that song is it.

also ...

the lighthouse family, m people or dido because it's all music for people who don't actually like music.
( coco, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:36, Reply)

Well, I' ve grown to hate every single dance/euro-dance-song...
we play in our junior high's crappy could-be-a-disco-wannabe-if-you-were-blind-and-deaf-occasions. You see, in Finland we have these guys from the occupational school, who get a crappy japanese car (typically a Toyota Corolla dx) and start "tuning" it. By tuning, I mean adding humongous bass-speakers, air-fresheners, shaded windows and even strobo-lights into your car.

And then, during the weekends they just cruise around endlessly in swarms, playing euro-dance really loud and trying to get some chicks (usually much younger than them) inside their cars. They are often drunk too, due to the finnish drinking-culture, which has been like that for us, males, for many decades.

Something i particularly hate..mhh

Imperio - Amor inifitus

It rocks.

Ps. BTW, the bass-speaker problem has got pretty serious in Norway, 'cause 30% of young males there have a hearing-aid (heard this info from my dad sometime, is propably as inaccurate as shit).
(Polho, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:34, Reply)

Fast Food Rockers - A Pizza Hut
Picture the scene, it's 6:30am on a Sunday, my husband is still asleep and i'm up feeding our 6 month old son. It's a beautiful scene and all is right with the world, all of a sudden my next door neighbours get home from from a heavy night on the town and turn their music up as loud as humanly possible...do they play decent music? oh no, it's bloody 'A pizza hut a Pizza hut, kentucky fried chicken and a pizza hut' baby wakes up and screams the place down, mummy (me) is less than happy and my husband storms round to demand they turn it down, they do with much muttering and grumbling but the damage has been done, me and my husband have the damn song stuck in our heads for the rest of the day. Now if I even hear a snippet I can't get rid of it...Can we kill the Fast Food Rockers?
( Roxy_Hart is so so old, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:29, Reply)

Scatman John - I'm A Scatman...
....aside from having one of the oddest names in music (scat-man???) playground law depicted that a rumour of Scatman John's death would travel around every month or so after its release.

Scatman John was a stutterer and his lyrics generally revolved around being happy, world peace and lots of Ski-bap-bop-ba-dop-bop.

It was awful!

As a little epilogue to this tail of sadness... (sounding like Deep Deep Trouble by Bart Simpson now - another truly bad record)
musician, John "Scatman" Larkin passed away on the 3rd of December , 1999, at his home in California. This one isn't a playground rumour
( beefandcheese, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:19, Reply)

Wee Rule
'Wee Rule' by the Wee Papa Girl rappers has been scientifically proven as the shitest song ever, beating Joe Dolce's 'Shadappa Ya Face' by a country mile.


Oh and Stephen Duffy is bloody great actually. Listen to "I Love My Friends".
(Lambkin, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:10, Reply)

Post Me (With your Mouse)
Steven 'Tin Tin' Duffy - Kiss Me (With Your Mouth)

This song is so bad it's good. But seriously Mr Duffy what else would we kiss you with???
(negativefactor, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:05, Reply)

Chain Reaction - Diana Ross
Many years ago I was in a nightclub in London (I believe it was called "The Park") on a College night out. Very naff, lots of neon and UV lighting - very 80's.

Chain Reaction was Number 1 at the time and this nightclub, for reasons unfathomable to mankind, had decided that whatever was Number 1 would be played every alternate song.

Not only that, but every other time they played it, they showed the video as well.

They even had speakers and screens in the loos - there was no escape!

It still makes me cringe even to this day.
(and the Steps version is just as shite!)
( JugglerJAF It's curtains for you.Lacy gently wafting curtains, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:03, Reply)

Right Said effing Fred!
That podgy old queen isn't too effing sexy for anything. Absolute tat. Catchy as the 'flu in a nursery, but utterly devoid of any content, as he is devoid of any talent. His gab show was total rubbish too.
( ronin9026, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 22:00, Reply)

Come on Eileen

Weddings, office parties, you know the score.. the drunken rabble who've sat in the corner suddenly hear it, and something stirs in their tiny primative minds..

Go toora loora toora loo rye aye
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

I'd go on, but my brain is being seized by horrific flashbacks and it's giving me a headache

GARRRGGGGHHH
(pearish, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:56, Reply)

Here's my offering
To be sung to the tune of "My Favourite Things" from "The Sound Of Music"....

My Least Favorite Things

Julio Iglesias and all The Three Tenors
Radio 2 and the Cliff Adams Singers
Washed-up soap actors who then try to sing
These are a few of my least favorite things

Cream compilations and Ibiza anthems
Coked-up dance DJs and Elton John tantrums
Madonna and Britney, what were you thinking?
These are a few of my least favorite things

Bjork in odd dresses with badly smeared make-up
A mechanised pop industry that needs a shake-up
Cliff Richard crooning about the three kings
These are a few of my least favourite things

When the dog howls
When I hear Sting
When I'm feeling sad
I simply download all my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

(Repeat all verses until brain melts)


As is the common saying on this site: "it took me far too long to do this!"
(trollbite, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:54, Reply)

Tom Tom Club "Don't Say No"
Early nineties I lived above a cocaine dealer in sunny glasgow. On the plus side we got to meet famous scottish people passing through the close looking slightly shifty. On the minus side he regularly went on a bender and played this song until the large hours of the morning. Just the bass mind - none of that melody and lyric pish.

Fortunately our neighbour met and fell in love with the bouncer of a local pub and while he was courting her one evening he got a bit weary of the music, kicked the chap's door in and stamped his stereo to death. Violence and vandalism has never sounded so sweet.

And anything by Craig David - anybody who uses the words "special lady" without irony in the 21st century needs to have his adenoids pulled out the long way.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:43, Reply)

dat wurst rekhord fing
I no myne iiz is dat suckh-fayced "feargal sharkey" - ghott givun ah hole LPee, nevuh plaid itt. Two frit, yn caise hee jumpt owt an tryd two shagg mei.
He does that you know
(shonet..............twigmuntous...perch-nos-eous........cow-belly-antus....thats all i got now, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:42, Reply)

I borrow my sister's car a lot,
but it has no CD player in it, therefore I tend to listen to whatever is on the Radio - sometimes I sing along if it's a nice tune.

A couple of months ago while driving through Edinburgh I had the window rolled down as it was a nice day - I stopped at a set of traffic lights and noticed a rather attractive girl walking along the pavement, looking directly at me.

At first I thought, "Woo - my animal magnetism is drawing her to me", then I realised I was singing rather loudly to 'More than Words' by Extreme. She was simply looking at me with pity and disgust.

I hate that song now.
( Mystery_Bob, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:32, Reply)

Love Bomb Baby - the Tigertailz
A welsh glam rock band of truely tragic proportions. I bought their second album after seeing them on the ITV Chart Show in the Rock chart when I was about 15 - watermelon knows what I was thinking most of my other purchases at the time were more sensible, Stone Roses, JAMC etc but hey, at least they're not as bad as the Stereophonics...

See them in all their glory : www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/kurtwood/938/index.htm

Link to ra version of the song : www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/kurtwood/938/audio/Bezerk-LoveBombBaby.ra
( thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:28, Reply)

And another one...
I used to be a band with my sister. We wrote a song, and the first verse goes as such...
'You smell like a cow and you eat cheese pasties (repeat x3)...cheeeeeeeeeese pasties!'
I WAS nine at the time.
(HanaBizzle, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:25, Reply)

my first my last my everything?
i think by the love walrus himself barry white. its so bad because quite a new band in the local area of southampton were playing went to see them and they sampled it with hilarious effects but my mates turned to me asking if they borrowed it from me. now i'm not exactly the pop listening type so i cried.
( Mr. Street, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:22, Reply)

hmmmm
I won a tape of New Kids on the Block - trying to relaunch themselves as NKOTB. Song was called 'Dirty Dawg' The lyrics are:
"Dog, dirty dog
dog, dirty dog
dog, dirty dog
you're oh so dirty"
Complete with samples of dogs barking. The DJ gave it to me as a prize for being the best dancer at my primary school disco. To avoid getting any more shit tapes I have never danced again.
(guest_account, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:20, Reply)

well i once made a record
called, Fookin a trouser press. It didnt catch on. thank god. (badum tish)
(massive pelican: jumps for money, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:17, Reply)

Barbie Girl by Aqua
The first CD I ever had. Which is completely humiliating. I hate that song SO MUCH.
Thankfully, it eventually disappeared.
(HanaBizzle, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 21:14, Reply)

Celine Dion
My Heart will go on (or whatever it was called)
Shit film
Shit song
enough said.
( galanthis, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:55, Reply)

Anything by Busted
I know hating busted isnt exactly original, but i can't stand the way they tout themselves as punk, and they clearly do not play their own instruments, they don't even mime convincingly
( The Incredible... accident free since, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:53, Reply)

Without doubt
The atrocity Lady in Red by Chris de Burgh. The reason is a little involved.

Following a misunderstanding in Bridgend I spent the night in the police cells. In one of the other cells was a drunken welsh watermelon-knuckle who spent *all bloody night* singing the lady in bastard red.

That wouldn't have been so bad, but he knew about one line from the chorus. The night proceeded along the lines of "The laaaayyy in reeeddddd.... isss dannnciiinnnn... nerrrr nerrr nerrr.... laaa laaa laaa. (pause) The laaayyyy innnn reeedddddd...."

Eight. Hours. Non. Stop.

I have never, ever, before or since, hated a person so much in my entire life. If I *ever* see Chris de Burgh, I promise faithfully that I will slaughter him or die in the attempt.

That is all.
(_(_(_(_(_(_(_(_(_ =o.o=, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:51, Reply)

Ooh! I know!
You remember that stupid song by 'PPK' where it was all just beeps? Yeah? It made my computer have a heart attack. And die.
(Nudger - Back on b3ta having been away since '04!, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:51, Reply)

Terrance and philip
Uncle fucker.

Because they are canadian uncle fuckers.
( Gaz, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:40, Reply)

Venga bus and boom boom boom
By the venga boys. It was ok the first few times but then dj's had to play it on the minute every minute.

I want to die from just thinking about the robotic voice.
( Gaz, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:38, Reply)

The 1st So Solid Crew album is a skidmark on the bedsheet of humanity.
I bought it on the strength of '21 Seconds' which was fairly good. On the alubum, however, one or two songs have got good beats going, but the lyrics rarely rise above "We're dead hard, and why does everyone hate us, and we've got loads of bling and we drink Cristal champagne and and and...". Absolute crap. It went to the charity shop less than 24 hours after I bought it, with not one song being copied onto the iMac, not even '21 Seconds' which I was sick of by then.
( pxyzyzygy, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:32, Reply)

'London Boys - Ten Commandments of Dance'
Admittedly it was a christmas present but god i loved it. Oh the shame! I don't know how or why because it's ten tracks of electronic synth hell with possibly the campest cover in the world (think pink stripes and Fame-esque poses) but hey ho i was young and oh so foolish. Check out 'Chinese Radio' - it's an absolute corker.

I think the Bill and Ted's bogus journey soundtrack deserves a mention too, what was i thinking......
(kendoddsdadsdogsdead, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:27, Reply)

jive bunny
"swing the mood" - the beginning of the end...
( new_matt, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:23, Reply)

I love to Boogie
by T-Rex.
I am actually so hateful of this song that it genuinely fills me with uncontrollable rage and brings me out in a cold sweat.
Everything about it. The fucking horrible guitar bit. The voice. The fucking guitar. With the stupid fucking thing it does.
I'm not joking, this song really does make me physically ill.
Thinking about it has made me all angry.
You bastards.
( Mullet Over, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:20, Reply)

Mad world
It's a good song, what ever way you look at it the hip and fast old version or the new slow one which was on the movie DONNIE DARKO. But why the flange did Alex from FAME ACADEMY think she was good enough for such a song? I mean she/he/whatever is covering a cover, God she looks as good as she sounds ... that means she/he/whatever is rubbish
(WiggZ, Tue 2 Dec 2003, 20:13, Reply)