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My wallet is going to hurt
www.b3tards.com/u/5d4c552eb78a7f1b7de2/tyres.jpg *

but £7.50 to "dispose" of my old tyres? fuck off I want them for flower pots.

*is shopping about for a cheaper deal but there are not too many people around here that sell & fit tyres that size

what was the last thing that hurt your wallet? and what's for lunch. (egg sandwich and chicken noodle soup)
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:33, archived)
Why are you going for the expensive tyres?

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:34, archived)
Those 1100 vauxhall engines need something special to get all that power down on the tarmac.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
There is barely a car in the fucking world
that needs 255s on the front. You wouldn't be able to the turn the steering wheel

therefore, I claim internet autismistruth, ONLINE.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:07, archived)
Also by the looks of things his Jag has got 5 WHEELS!!!!
FUCKING SMELL SOME PANT SMOKE I DO!
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:08, archived)
spare wheel as well you numpty

(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:12, archived)
I thought those jags had the narrow space saver wheels.

(I helped save b3ta! turb0t, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:14, archived)
it came with one of those reinflate cans
fucking useless if you damage the tyre. anyway I always sell the space savers on fleabay and get a full size wheel.
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:19, archived)
Actually, the concept of a space saver spare wheel is shit.
Lets assume you get a puncture, and you take out your space saver wheel from your tiny boot, (which gives you the best use of your boot space). But where the fuck are you supposed to put your full sized wheel and tyre that has now got a puncture ?
Assuming also, that you have a boot full of shopping/groceries/luggage, etc...
(I helped save b3ta! turb0t, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:24, archived)
*has full size spare*
YEAH! I am the SEX.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:25, archived)
yes
hence why I always buy a full size wheel (the jag has room for it in the boot anyway)
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:27, archived)
...........don't ruin my joke by being serious please.
pleasedrivethrutocollectionwindowpleeeease
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:16, archived)
I called you a numpty
if I was serious I would call you a cunt.

cunt

no offence

forum banter

;-)
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:17, archived)
Everyone loves cunts. They are awesome.

I think your car has got a robotic hand that comes out and wanks you off as you drive and listen to a slighty detuned radio 2 whilst checking the FTSE 100 on your 12 blackberry storms, the scent of your magic tree hanging from your indicator is "PPHNNEEAAARR!: the scent of fox hunting"
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:21, archived)
how very dare you!
I never listen to radio 2

and I don't own a blackberry
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:24, archived)
My magic tree scent is "Damp Exotic Musk and Old Prawn Cocktail Crisp Packet"

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:27, archived)
Mine is "Rich Mahogany", with a faint odour of Sex Panther colone.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:30, archived)
I dont have one
I love the smell of leather on leather...

oh.. erm... yes.

pine.

yes, thats it pine.
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:33, archived)
For me, listening to car bores is like listening to two cooks arguing over who
has the faster oven. Well, except the oven conversation might be more interesting.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:11, archived)
actually
I'm going to have to do an admission of wrongness, ONLINE

an XJR on 19" wheels does use 255s front and rear.

Fucking hell though, that's idiotic. why? I can see why rear 255s might be justified, but fronts? stupid. You can happily fit 235s though, you might want to consider that.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:14, archived)
I bet my oven is faster than your oven.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:16, archived)
I bet it's fucking not.
anyway, which one? I have TWO OVENS. and FIVE RINGS ON MY HOB.

this makes my penis bigger, right?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:17, archived)
NO WAI.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:20, archived)
LIKE, WAI.
Hob cat is checkin ur hobz.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:21, archived)
My parents got a new cooker. It's got
three ovens and six hobs, two of which have got a twin gas rings. The ovens go from 0-60° in 114s and have a rear spoiler (splash plate) and single 225mm bore four speed exhaust system.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:26, archived)
You can't ride on your parent's glory, failboy.
What have YOU got? A single camping gaz burner? Yes, we know all about you and your single ring.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:29, archived)
1200 matches sellotaped together

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:32, archived)
I've got a classic four ring gas powered variable speed hob with a bespoke worktop arrangement,
dual control heating element oven with original buff finish paint. The exhaust has the traditional twin speed and single lighting system. Pre 1993 so there is no road tax, and it sails its service every year. They don't build them like that any more.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:33, archived)
i like having 5 rings on my hob.
The Mrs was totally against it. but I like cooking with my WOK.
I also bought a stainless steel hob, and the Mrs was totally against that as well, because stainless steel is hard to clean.
(I helped save b3ta! turb0t, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:28, archived)
Did you go for the 386 model with the ayrodynamic doors?
I was going to, but my budget couldn't extend that far, so I got the 376 but plumetted for the Advance Thermodynamic Knobs.

In retrorespect, I should have tried them in the shop, because my hands just can't take that much tourque.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:22, archived)
hahaha totally I mean 255s instead of 235s hahaha could you imagine 245s?!?!? ahahahah I've got no idea what we're talking about hahah

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:18, archived)
tyre width in mm, DG.
It's basically just a penis subsitute.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:18, archived)
So really, we should all fit racing cycle tyres.
30mm wide, BUT 29 inches diameter! YEAH BABY!
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:21, archived)
It's all about the girth, baby.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:22, archived)
You don't need to tell me.
205 wide on 16 rims. SEXY.

*oils up*
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:23, archived)
aaah gotcha :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:22, archived)
My oven goes up to gas mark 11.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:21, archived)
The only reason grrrmachine isn't posting now is because his hands are busy,
he probably has some jumpleads on his nips too.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:23, archived)
I have no idea why
possibly as its the XJR and not the standard motor
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:22, archived)

www.euroautospecialists.com/euro1/1997XJR.jpg

not mine but one just like it
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
when did you turn 50?

(likeajackhammer, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
+ a kiddy touching 50 year old
horrible car.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:42, archived)
ohhh wait this is a look-at-my-car thread.

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
LOOK! LOOK AT MY CAR!
Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrm

TOO SLOW, SUCKERS!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:03, archived)
*Shambo zooms his matchbox car from the dining room table*
mum: EAT YOUR SOUP!!
Sham: sorry mum...
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:05, archived)
It's to get better grip with his Honda Accord

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
A holiday hurt my ankle.
And my pocket.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:34, archived)
Bloody hell. What are they going on?
Holiday to Mexico and I am eating honey and mustard pasta.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:35, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6227311
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
My last tyres cost £25 each.
Why do you need ones like that?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:35, archived)
My tyres cost £120 each
Size and performance rating
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
Because he's an F1 driver.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6227311
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
Ponce.
No offence, forum banter.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
I have a party to go to at 3pm.
So for lunch: cake.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:35, archived)
Make sure you get to see the big freezer.
I know they can only do 10 people at once, but the big walk-in freezer there is great.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:39, archived)
Oh man, when I grow up, I want to work in McDonalds....
... I could go in that big freezer whenever I want then !
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
I have no idea what you're talking about.

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:46, archived)
It will be the valet on the car this week
we've been pruning the conifers and we put them in the boot of the car but we've managed to get pine sap all over the roof fabric, and seen as it's my dads car he's not best please as nothing will get it off.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
clay bar
google them - very useful things
(I helped save b3ta! TBL I posted this on, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
that seems ok for the paintwork
but this is the fabric on the interior.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
Hand cleaner. Possibly.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
Mayonnaise/Rubbing Alcohol.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
I had my last one cut in half (two semicircles)
so I could put it round the end of my garden wall to stop new tyres and bits of bodywork from scraping along it. They did that for free for me.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
Glasses hurt my wallet
but then they are supercool almost-hornrimmed awesomeness.

Lunch was COW SANDWICH. It was good.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
me too
i got some ray bans
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
These are Jasper Conran
They were the only sort of ish retro ones in specsavers.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
What did you get for free?
Or did you choose reactions lenses instead?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
Reactions. Sod off am I being blind in my sunglasses ever again... :D

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:44, archived)
Tried malt loaf the other day.
It's alright.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:39, archived)
Did you have it with butter or marg? It's nicer with butter.
At least you didn't think it was horrid.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
Slapped some butter on it.
6 out of 10, will eat again.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
Did you toast it?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:42, archived)
I did not.
Is this recommended?
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
It's quite nice toasted
Give a slice a try when you next have some
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:57, archived)
\o/ good lad

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:44, archived)
*Malt loaf fives!*

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
that's (very expensive)

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:39, archived)
Birthday presents
I think the next thing to hurt it will be a tent though.
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
Are you pitching it inside your wallet or just paying over the odds for one?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
No, I'm just poor

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:42, archived)
Beg Sammi for some money.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:42, archived)
£40 tents in Asda
FACT
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
£1 for tesco value bed sheets,
get 3 or 4 or those, some value safety pins and steal some bamboo poles from someone's garden and make your own for a fraction of the price.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:46, archived)
Basha + string + hammock + 2 trees.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:47, archived)
*boik*
www.beautifulbasha.com

NSFW
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:49, archived)
You horrid man.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
I just had no idea what a basha was so I googled it and now I'm scarred for life :(

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:05, archived)
No

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:48, archived)
It hasn't yet
but I'll be forking out for Fleetwood Mac, Simple Minds, Cribs and You Me At Six tickets next month. I don't even want to see You Me At Six, they're my niece's favourite band and she can't go and see them on her own.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
YMA6 are quite fun live.
Sources: I saw them in Leeds last month.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:46, archived)
Oddly enough- a new wallet.

(I helped save b3ta! Lord Gnome, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:43, archived)
haha you bought one too many tires

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:47, archived)
*I like this*

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 12:55, archived)
Do you not know?
It's always good to have a spare, incase one tyre turns out to not be a tyre, but instead be a duck
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 13:09, archived)