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poo bum

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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 9 May 2017, 22:16, archived)

what else

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 22:22, archived)

What, that isn't enough for you?
Greedy mare.
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 23:45, archived)

alright dribble

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 10 May 2017, 0:17, archived)

alright not$$

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 10 May 2017, 0:24, archived)

my kids love that book
www.amazon.co.uk/Poo-Bum-Stephanie-Blake/dp/1877467979/
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 10 May 2017, 9:15, archived)

New cool thread

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:41, archived)

need a wee brb

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:42, archived)

cool
I'm bored as fuck and browsing for PC parts, going to do a well deserved upgrade at the end of the month; new case, new GPU, maybe a gaming mouse and mechanical keyboard as well and if money allows a 2nd monitor too. I'll finally be able to play games released after 2012 :D
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:42, archived)

the porn will look great on that

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:46, archived)

I have...wait for it...4 yes 4 24 inch flat panels like this
www.ebuyer.com/746747-acer-s241hl-24-full-hd-1ms-slim-gaming-monitor-um-fs1ee-c01?mkwid=s_dm&pcrid=51508043699&pkw=&pmt=&gclid=CjsKDwjw0cXIBRCxjqnE3K3sHhIkAL1LezT8xVlW3OhDOaigj2cHtwqHunIJ9WOYBG8FdGssMz2JGgIIIPD_BwE

I should have only 3 but amazon properly fucked up an order once and brought me a free one by mistake.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:51, archived)

That's a nice monitor actually, good price too
Would you recommend?
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:29, archived)

Yes certainly.
The picture is great. I don't really do games though so can't
Comment there.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:35, archived)

Anythings an improvememt over my current setup
The image quality will be more important for the design stuff I occasionally do, I'll keep it as a strong maybe though, cheers
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:20, archived)

Anytime

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:25, archived)

You disgusting nerd

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 17:10, archived)

Yes

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H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:29, archived)

Why use 2 monitors when you can just get one massive one like I did?
www.pcbuyit.co.uk/dell-u3415w-34-ips-led-ultra-wide-curved-monitor-hdmi-dp-monitor.html
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2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:07, archived)

The £500 saving
I'm not one for that eyefinity complete immersion setup, I'd like a 2nd screen so I can have other stuff open on it while I game, or to put references on when I'm using the main screen for 3D stuff or drawing
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:15, archived)

That's bigger than my TV.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 19:02, archived)

nerd chat:
budget upgrade for a Radeon HD5700? I've got an i5-6600K but it's going to waste with such an old GPU.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 19:03, archived)

Not the foggiest.
It never occurs to me to read up on these things until after I've built a PC, but then I realise that it's too late and so don't bother.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 19:14, archived)

i'm still waiting
for a socket AM4 Mini ITX board to come out
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 9 May 2017, 22:20, archived)

talk to myself, shall I

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:44, archived)

cool

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:46, archived)

Alright dribble

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:58, archived)

alright dribble.
About time like.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:45, archived)

cheers

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:46, archived)

cheers

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:48, archived)

cheers

(

Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:49, archived)

Gay

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:51, archived)

Fabulous

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Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:55, archived)

Cheers

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:58, archived)

cheers

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:50, archived)

cheers

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:29, archived)

no, posh sit down wee, used paper and everything

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:47, archived)

had a wee AMA!

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:45, archived)

anti ligature cubicle?

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:51, archived)

yes

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:54, archived)

Was it a wee beastie?

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:53, archived)

clean, clear and ejected with a sense of pride

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:55, archived)

might do a poo in a bit

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:57, archived)

wipe twice for luck, thrice for jesus

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:06, archived)

I tried to do one earlier
but some inconsiderate fucker was in the cubicle next to me so neither of us could go. After 10 minutes I caved and left.

I still need to shit but may wait til I get home now, I can't handle the disappointment of going back in there to find someone else is using it again. And an irrational phobia was born!
(Boiled_Tater is not the messiah, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:23, archived)

Only Teh Gay's are really comfortable about relaxing their sphincters when another man is grunting only a couple of feet away

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:58, archived)

I've been off the booze for a couple of days.
Consequently I've just done my first firm poo in a while, quite an ordeal if I'm honest.
(immadme, Tue 9 May 2017, 19:05, archived)

t n
(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Tue 9 May 2017, 20:26, archived)

HI, NURSES!

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 20:41, archived)

Cool.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 17:10, archived)

thanks

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:15, archived)

cooler than the water in a swimming pool

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:14, archived)

not this one
it's hot with urine
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 17:15, archived)

m.imgur.com/pJSsCC4?r
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Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 20:35, archived)

lol, nickelback

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monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 20:55, archived)

Looks used to me

(

mongychops, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:09, archived)

only a little bit

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:43, archived)

Afternoon my lovelies
This is my last week off work. How should I mark the occasion?
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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:31, archived)

poo in a bucket

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$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:31, archived)

This is nothing special.

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:44, archived)

cut back on the wanking so that you're not overcome with urges by 3pm and end up rubbing one out in the stationery cupboard

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Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:36, archived)

Good advice

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:46, archived)

Slip on your slanket and binge watch Full House on Netflix.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:36, archived)

It's always sunny in philidelphia
Has me hooked at the moment.
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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:47, archived)

You'll have to talk to 2Hats about that.
I thought it was crap.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:56, archived)

fuck's sake mm

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:59, archived)

I genuinely don't know what I like about it.
There are a few gems of episodes but the majority of it is shite.

Have you seen the Chardee MacDennis game episodes?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:01, archived)

wasting your time, m8

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Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:06, archived)

2Hats is right, you won't win me round.
I watched episode one, it was painfully unfunny, so I'm not motivated to go back to it.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:10, archived)

I wouldn't try and win you around.
And I skipped series 1-4 and just started at series 5.
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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:11, archived)

Yeah, if a programme is "only good if you don't watch most of it" then I'm not bothering.
Bojack Horseman is supposed to be hilarious if you skip the first 6 episodes - bollocks to that.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:15, archived)

Schitts Creek is good

(

GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:19, archived)

A Bladerunner themed dog grooming and vegan awareness seminar

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H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:51, archived)

Yeah - dog "grooming" like that's a thing.

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:52, archived)

They're unlikely to put out if you don't butter them up first.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:57, archived)

Manolith would know
Where is the stupid fat wanker anyway?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:01, archived)

I decided to get almond milk for me overnight oats.
Dunno man, I just don't know.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:05, archived)

That's a risky move right there, Slippy Mickey
What's wrong with good old standard British, proper pasteurized lactose filled cow's milk? S'not natural all these substitutes, when was the last time you saw someone milk an almond anyway? Mug's game, son.
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:11, archived)

Apparently you can make it yourself by blending 1 cup of almonds (skin removed) with 4 cups of water.
Then running it through a muslin, but if it's going in oats you'd probably be better not filtering some of the 'goodness' out?
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:20, archived)

Might as well just soak your oats in water, chuck in some nuts for texture.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:22, archived)

Chuck in DEEZ NUTS for texture.
*points at crotch*
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:33, archived)

Added protein if you soak the oats in your own jizz.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:43, archived)

Wouldn't the muslim get all wet though?

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:33, archived)

Real men soak their oats in blood.
Not their own blood, that would be gross.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:13, archived)

poo out your helmit

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:05, archived)

Helmut
Fool
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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:06, archived)

Be completely unpleasant online

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:14, archived)

Fancy giving me any pointers dribble?

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:15, archived)

Achieve zen

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keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:16, archived)

Alright, The G Man

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:18, archived)

Gunga galunga
And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:31, archived)

wank into a cocked hat

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:31, archived)

cock into a wanked hat

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keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:31, archived)

Welly wanging tournament in Lyme Regis on the weekend

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 15:31, archived)

do I bring my own or are they provided?

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:32, archived)

Up to you.
I've got a pro set.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 15:37, archived)

Am in

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:33, archived)

Cool. Beer tent at 11

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 15:42, archived)

Will you come with me?

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:52, archived)

Sure. Is it your first welly wanging? I'll show you how to get a good wang

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 16:01, archived)

And here I am 250 miles away wanging my welly by myself :(

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:35, archived)

wahey!
_{Editor's Note: Hey readers, what do you think about that for a wanking euphemism?
Send all wanking references to B3ta Towers, London, FREEPOST. Cheers}
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:02, archived)

Is it ok if i wank into a welly and ship that?

(Boiled_Tater is not the messiah, Tue 9 May 2017, 18:27, archived)

Join Marillion

(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 9 May 2017, 15:37, archived)

play Rose West's Knicker Quest

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:00, archived)

Just say No!
www.digitiser2000.com/uploads/4/0/6/6/40667199/screen-shot-2016-09-21-at-11-51-21_orig.png
i162.photobucket.com/albums/t266/Dumpus/GrangeHillGame.jpg
to buying your gear from shabbily dressed zombies.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:02, archived)

Fuck me those images must be hosted on a server made from cheese.

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:34, archived)

I'm bored as arseholes.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:12, archived)

Same
Only 45 minutes to go before a mooch in the sun with the dog and an evening jam / smoke
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 16:41, archived)

Proofreading a book for a mate
and it's got phrases like "chiasmatic" and "emplotment" and "sacralization of the mundane" in it.

What's the wankiest thing you own?
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:56, archived)

Is he the author?
Does he own any punch-decorated, two tone brogues?
(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:02, archived)

I do!

(

GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:08, archived)

It's a book on photography
so he's taken that idea of "a picture tells a thousand words" as some sort of personal challenge.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:42, archived)

A full set of wanking spanners.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:04, archived)

chrome-wankium plated?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:09, archived)

Official George Alagiah or knock (one) off?

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:51, archived)

Paris, Texas; Wings of Desire and 2001 on bluray.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:05, archived)

I picked up a copy of Hagakure, after watching Ghost Dog.
Y'know, just in case my head is ever cut off in battle, I'll be prepared to complete one final act.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:06, archived)

Your mate is David Crimond AICMFP.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:11, archived)

I've got loads of wank books about communism, the French revolution and che Guevara stuff from when I was a prick.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 12:11, archived)

I think "No Logo" was the closest I came to reading a political text.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:18, archived)

owning that book is the slacktivist's business card

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:35, archived)

I just like resting before I'm tired, ok?

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:41, archived)

I was considering reading the shock doctrine or why we can't afford the rich.
Other more interesting stuff keeps shunting it.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:40, archived)

One of the topics of shock doctrine is ECT and it's failures
but Adam Curtis did a better job in one of his documentaries either Century of Self or The Trap
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:43, archived)

I downloaded all the Adam Curtis's a while back.
Haven't gotten round to Centry of the Self yet. I like his stuff but it is pretty much posh tin-foil.

Pandora's Box is quite good.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:49, archived)

Children of the albatross by Anais Nin
what a load of shit
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:27, archived)

I've got both of Henry Miller's "Tropic" books on my shelves, and couldn't finish either

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:34, archived)

I've read Tropic of Ruislip,
but I don't think that's one of his.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:49, archived)

a big jar of wank with 'wank' painted on the side

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:30, archived)

nice

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:34, archived)

yeah, they're difficult to track down these days

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:18, archived)

what's in the jar?
(said in Brad Pitt's voice from Se7en)
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:34, archived)

Double wank and shit chips.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:50, archived)

it's a jar of wank, m8t
come on
(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:06, archived)

How do you put a verb in a jar?

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:09, archived)

I tried reading that Will Self book with the chimps.
I gave up.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:42, archived)

Great Apes?
I got a load of Will Self books when our neighbour's son moved out. Without exception, they were awful.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:50, archived)

Yeah, probably.
It was just self wanking over how many words he knew.

Thing is, most good authors (Orwell, Vonnegut) make themselves more accessible by conveying difficult things in simple terms not the other way round.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:57, archived)

Can't argue with this.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:00, archived)

good is subjective though, innit
I'm sure Vonnegut and other linguistically simple writers (Hemingway) find favour just because it's easy to plough through their works in one sitting. It's easy to use simple terms if you've got nothing of depth or substance to say in the first place.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:06, archived)

Vonnegut has depth and substance.
Have you ever considered being some sort of inverse critic?
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:07, archived)

I never got into Vonnegut
it was too "I'm 14 and this is deep" for me. Prolly my fault because I read his famous one just after reading Catch 22, since I'd heard there were many parallels, and it just came off as naff sci-fi in comparison.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:10, archived)

Perhaps you've just got low emotional intelligence what with you being all autistic and that.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:12, archived)

yeah, that must be it

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:13, archived)

Catch 22 is rubbish.
M*A*S*H was much funnier.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:18, archived)

Robert Altman FTW

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:22, archived)

The TV series, not the film.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:24, archived)

Still stands. Robert Altman was great.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:35, archived)

Yeah, tis true.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:44, archived)

Been watching a few of his of late. Watched 3 Women the other day. Got A Wedding to watch.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:05, archived)

I hope Popeye is on your watchlist.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:29, archived)

It is.
Are you aware of Elliot Gould's work in 'Dead Men Don't Die'? It's basically the thinking man's Weekend at Bernies.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:30, archived)

You have mentioned this before.
Good, is it?
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:39, archived)

shite in a good way.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:40, archived)

My kind of film.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:44, archived)

Vonnegut is some excellent reading.
Self is crap.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:09, archived)

I level a similar criticism at Dickens.

(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:24, archived)

Yeah, that's florid wank.
I think the only time he was succinct was when he publicly humiliated his wife.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:25, archived)

I managed to get through about a quarter of Bleak House
before I gave up on him for good. I've read Victorian authors. They are little different from modern authors, the odd "vexed countenance" aside.

Dickens, however, is a prick.
(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:27, archived)

you just have to judge it by the standards of its time
His work is pay-per-chapter serialised sensationalism, designed to keep the punters buying train station magazines on a weekly basis. It might be entertaining, but it's not fit for university-level analyses. Same with Austen, the melodramatic harpy.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:33, archived)

Would I be correct in assuming that Shakespeare's audience were otherwise starved of entertainment?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:45, archived)

quite the opposite really
there were shitloads of playwrights pumping out melodramas; so many so that there's still contention about who wrote some of William's plays since he can't have penned all of them himself.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:47, archived)

Right.
So why are they so bad?
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:53, archived)

The characters lack depth, the plots are ridiculously contrived, the comedy is paper thin, the moral tone is saccharine
Ooh Fagin's super evilly evil, Pip's too thick to wonder where his money comes from, Scrooge is going to turn his entire life around just because no-one shows up at his funeral, blah blah blah, they read like 19th century episodes of Neighbours.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:03, archived)

The Muppets adaptation was alright though.
And Scrooged.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:06, archived)

Like I said, if you judge them relative to their period
I expect Dickens one of the more accomplished serialists, and since novels were such a new thing I expect he looks like a shiny penny in a mound of dogshit. But if we force him into the school's national curriculum, we can expect Stranger Things to be taught in a hundred years' time as a triumph of serialised drama too.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:12, archived)

In 3000 words, explain why the three boys devote so much energy to finding Will Byers
while the older teenagers don't spend anywhere near as much time investigating ~~Nancy~~ Barb's disappearance. How does this reflect on early 21st Century attitudes of young women as disposable citizens?
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:14, archived)

I want to know why no one gave a shit about Barb dying.
I really enjoyed that series.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:26, archived)

sorry, I meant Barb not Nancy

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:34, archived)

Bleak Expectations was good.
Up until the Martian invasion, at least.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:29, archived)

I never did find out why The Pickwick Papers is regarded as humorous.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:43, archived)

Dunno

(

mongychops, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:42, archived)

Other than that it's probably Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid
or Ulysses.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:48, archived)

A set of baoding balls.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:55, archived)

~~aoding~~ enwa
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:00, archived)

What?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:17, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Wa_balls
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:22, archived)

I see.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:47, archived)

~~see~~ click-clack when I walk
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:15, archived)

upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/fb/FMacRumours.PNG
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:31, archived)

I bought a ukulele
before they became popular
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:58, archived)

also, when I read things like this:
Sporting François Tusques and Don Cherry in its family-tree — you hear Ornette immediately — this is a revelatory, mid-seventies blend of spiritual, funky and free jazz with strong North African and Arab currents, confrontationally rooted in the traditional Occitan music of southern France.
Trumpeter Michael Marre calls it the musical expression of a kind of anarchist delirium. “It was like a fuck-you to to all the current nationalist trends, and for me, my roots being in Aveyron, it was an opportunity to mix, to interconnect everything… not closing any doors… just playing… There’s something like energy, something wild, that you don’t really find any more, currently. The fact that we work from the basic form of the quintet, but then subvert it, and that our first theme hails Coltrane, but at the same time is half from Andalusia — all that was us playing jazz, but on our own terms.”
‘Cossi Anatz.’ ‘How you doing?’
Wonderful stuff, warmly recommended.

I am tempted to part with around 40 notes to get a copy
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:02, archived)

I just remembered I paid about £60 for a coffee table book on Kowloon walled city.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:05, archived)

That actually sounds really interesting.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:08, archived)

It is. there's loads of photos.
There's a subtitled German documentary on it that's meant to be good.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-rj8m7Ssow

The Chinese seem to be very good at self-organising.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:24, archived)

dunno

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:07, archived)

something to do with guitar stuff probably

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:09, archived)

None of my guitar stuff is wanky, m8
If I'd bought the Korg Miku, I might concede the point
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:15, archived)

Man, I regret not buying that when I had the chance

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:22, archived)

I'll buy it for you

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:28, archived)

Thanks hun
but they're really hard to get hold of now. Much like myself.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:32, archived)

nothing is too hard to find for this heart

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:33, archived)

well, except for the fact that you've wanked on them all

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:51, archived)

well some of them are extremely valuable
I don't see that I had any choice
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:03, archived)

Probably got an old Guardian media supplement laying about somewhere

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:12, archived)

I'd read it before Alan Ford turns up and threatens you.
Nutters, from Parkhurst.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:13, archived)

Also, Amenaza al Mundo on limited clear vinyl

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 13:15, archived)

Rose West's Knicker Quest

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:20, archived)

Out now on ZX Spectrum and Amstrad CPC

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:24, archived)

I bet Rob makes it into a flash game

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:26, archived)

Well edgy.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:27, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqJTMl1F9Wg
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:40, archived)

A b3ta account

(

Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 May 2017, 14:24, archived)

Twohats has to go to Havant, which is the sphincter of Portsmouth.
Is there a part of your hometown which is properly shit?
We've got Rose Hill that is well dodgy, if you got down to the oval at Rose Hill you might get stabbed.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:21, archived)

I came from the midlands so most of it's shit.
I dunno, Redditch?
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:24, archived)

Good answer

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:25, archived)

When I moved here North Praga was the violent stabby bit that you never dared go in to
now it's all being regentrified by hipster pricks running bubble Tea cafes and fixie bike rental stores.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:32, archived)

So the only 'bad' bits are the communist-planned commuter zones
which are exactly as bland and grim as you'd expect 1960s planned communities to be.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:33, archived)

The fuck is bubble tea?

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:40, archived)

imagine a fruit or green tea added to a smoothie
then pile in a load of gelatin balls to give it a rancid tapioca/semolina texture as you suck it up through a straw.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:43, archived)

Fuck sake

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:44, archived)

remember who's doing the describing here

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:53, archived)

sorry, do you need help with the big words again?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:08, archived)

no, and that doesn't even make sense. thicko

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:22, archived)

have you suffered some brain trauma recently?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 12:24, archived)

grrrmachine's description is right up until the negative bits

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:45, archived)

I was right up into your nan's negative bits last night

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:52, archived)

well then i don't understand why you're against things with a 'rancid tapioca/semolina texture'

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:54, archived)

I like tapioca, but I wouldn't want it in my tea.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:06, archived)

When I was still in Blighty, Redhill and East Croydon were both equal parts concrete, underage drinking and violence.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:33, archived)

Not so much the sphincter
more thee little dimple at the top of the cleft
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:35, archived)

just wipe it clean after you've finished

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:35, archived)

yeah, there's far worse than havant

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:43, archived)

Go on

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:44, archived)

buckland and somerstown are the shittest bits in my immediate vicinity
leigh park is worse than havant too, i reckon

also, when i was growing up the 'povvo' area was called kenwood
(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:56, archived)

We used to walk down from halls by the guildhall, to a club in the pyramid pool thing.
Most of that was just dull middle class suburbia. But there was a weekly rock night in a funny sports bar right by Fratton station, and that wasn't s great spot.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:18, archived)

Landport's pretty shitty too
Fratton isn't great.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:23, archived)

I am the rough area AMA

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:35, archived)

do you have a bit that's not too scary so that middle class people can buy drugs?

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:41, archived)

yep
just round the back
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:43, archived)

it's like a brillo pad down there

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:43, archived)

sometimes

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:53, archived)

nah, not round here m8

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:39, archived)

Coventry is lovely all through

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:43, archived)

Luton had some fairly well defined "no go" areas.
Dunstable has Downside, which is a bit grim. Maidstone had Tovil, I suppose.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:51, archived)

Luton is shit, fullstop.
soz
(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:53, archived)

I genuinely liked living there.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:04, archived)

That sort of says more about you than it does about luton.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:16, archived)

Couldn't get a bacon sandwich in Bury Park for love nor money, mind.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:28, archived)

Somebody is stabbed to death within 3 miles of me every week..still it keeps me fit ..

(

mongychops, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:08, archived)

jelly.b3ta.com/talk/7960107
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:09, archived)

This is in the bit of Thanet the locals call Kosoville

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:10, archived)

Oh, hahahaha

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:19, archived)

When I lived in Guildford, the crap part was Park Barn; the pupils there burnt down their own school.
Now, however, it seems like the whole town is slowly sliding into the pit.

Nowadays I live near Bracknell.
(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:15, archived)

I might be in Bracknell next week.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:20, archived)

Hit me up, bruv.

(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:35, archived)

K

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:51, archived)

Bracknell is alright,
a lot of greenspace, it's a bit of a 1980s town planner's wet dream though
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:29, archived)

It's being regenerated at the moment.
With the forests around there it's soon going to be a really nice place to live. With rail, M3 and M4, it's going to get really frigging expensive, too.
(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:34, archived)

Guildford town centre is crap
They have a cracking guitar shop there, but there's no other reason to visit the place, so I don't go there often.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:34, archived)

Andertons?
Or the little place on Chapel St?

It used to be a genuinely nice place to live, but it got a reputation and so filled up with upwardly mobile, entitled cunts and all the nice people left, allowing more cunts in. And so the wheel turns.
(

Kroney, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:35, archived)

Not really, my bit of Cheltenham up past the racecourse is pretty nice. The other side has a big Tesco and people go round in tracksuits and trainers, is that the sort of thing you mean?

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:26, archived)

whaddon is pretty shit

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:36, archived)

My relatives live in Cheltenham and are chavvy scum.
Rowanfield I think it is.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 11:48, archived)

no,
my whole hometown is properly shit
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 9 May 2017, 11:28, archived)

morning

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:18, archived)

morning mista grrrr
have a satisfying day
(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:30, archived)

unlikely
I got three separate hours of sleep throughout the night
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:37, archived)

what happened in between? kids?

(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:39, archived)

Yeah
That impressively loud cry that toddlers have mastered, that goes WAAAAAH *breathe* WAAAAAAH *breathe* WAAAAAAH, worse than any neighbour's car alarm or early morning roadworks outside your bedroom window.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:48, archived)

but doesn't it melt your heart when the little fucker smiles at you and says "googoo"
as in: "thanks for whiping my ass old man. i'm going to terrorize you for years yet to come"?
(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:54, archived)

there are occassional moments to treasure
but then I realise it's like an emotional credit card, where I'm banking happiness now that I'll be charged for ten times over when it becomes a teenager.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:59, archived)

Don't let it get that far, bonsai kid

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:50, archived)

I can't keep chopping bits off, someone will notice

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:09, archived)

Decent swaddling will stop any unwanted expansion, it's like those fish that grow to the size of their tank, don't give it the opportunity

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:16, archived)

I'm assuming that mine will want nothing to do with me when they hit 13.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:57, archived)

I think you're being optimistic to expect them to take that long

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:03, archived)

Imagine ruining your life with your own jizz. Your own jizz looking up at you from its cot every day, and spending hundreds of thousands of pounds feeding and clothing and putting a roof over your jizz when you could have just flushed it in the sea.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:24, archived)

alright 'john lennon'

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:46, archived)

hahahaha

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:51, archived)

sexcrement

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:47, archived)

L O

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:36, archived)

R U B C?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:37, archived)

Some idiot booked a meeting for 9am.
Arse.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:40, archived)

One of my project teams has bi-weekly catchup meetings where the team tells everyone what they're up to
They're scheduled for Tuesday 8am and Thursday 5pm. I haven't attended one yet.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:49, archived)

Morning Grrrsl

(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:38, archived)

throwing mad shapes back atcha cos I know how to RAP

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:49, archived)

Hi

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 8:00, archived)

alright
I woke up with Paradise Lost's 1997 album "One Second" in my head, dunno why
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:02, archived)

Gay

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 8:35, archived)

Morning.
Only five minutes late for work this morning despite staying up till 01:50 to watch Mission: Impossible.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:16, archived)

the first one?
Apparently there's 5 now, not sure any franchise can stay good over that length.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:17, archived)

Yes, and exactly.
The franchise very quickly made the transition from techno-noir spy action to generic action and explosions.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:21, archived)

By the second film, wasn't it?
Not John Woo's finest hour.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:52, archived)

Yep.
I don't think I've even seen past the second film. It's probably as formulaic as Fast and Furious by the end of the series.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:53, archived)

I've seen a bit of the one where Cruise beats up Philip Seymour Hoffman,
and a bit of one with Jeremy Rennet in it. Neither was particularly compelling.
I got the impression that Fast & Furious got better as it went on? I've only seen the first, and it's awful, so I don't see that it could have got any worse.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:00, archived)

Just watch the first one 8 times, you'll not notice the difference.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:44, archived)

Going into Havant today
That tells you all you need to know
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:43, archived)

I havant been there yet

(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:45, archived)

And unless you end up working there
You will never have any reason to visit
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:46, archived)

work
muahahahahahahahaha
(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:47, archived)

do your best Godzilla impression on the place m8

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:53, archived)

Done and done

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:07, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lX3Jdw8Dxs
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:11, archived)

I don't much care for Havant

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 9:36, archived)

No one does
it's a shithole
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:01, archived)

i'm sorry, i havant a clue

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:40, archived)

Leigh(ve) it out, m8

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:02, archived)

WEE COCK FARM

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:12, archived)

true

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:15, archived)

I like to morning morning
I like to morning morning
I like to morning morning
I like to ...
MOR NING
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:53, archived)

don't want no itsy bitsy teeny weenie shrivelled little morning, man

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:15, archived)

i have a deep-seated hatred for that song
because i worked in a cinema when the first madagascar film came out, so i've heard that song (it plays over the end credits) hundreds of times
(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:46, archived)

yet here it is, stuck in your head again for another day
you're welcome
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:56, archived)

i could go off you, y'know

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:00, archived)

you could go off me off me
you could go off me off me
you could go off me off me
you could go ...
OFF ME
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:07, archived)

B&

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:17, archived)

jesus loves you

(

$$ ✅, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:53, archived)

This you know?

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 8:59, archived)

praise Him

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:01, archived)

course he does, the dirty queer

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:15, archived)

booooooooo

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:44, archived)

^ tardy ghost

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 9 May 2017, 9:56, archived)

you can't say that anymore

(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:17, archived)

And a pleasant day to you

(

Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:13, archived)

What's going on?

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 May 2017, 10:17, archived)

Not much
My phone won't let me access my normal account so I had to make this one
(

Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:21, archived)

won't let you?
how queer
(

manolith hooray for me, Tue 9 May 2017, 10:42, archived)

Bladerunner is shit.
Just saying
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 9 May 2017, 1:15, archived)

I'm glad I'm not the only one to hold this view.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 6:35, archived)

Different wanks for different planks
I quite liked it, I'd go as far to say that I liked it more than Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep

Not fussed about this sequel business but the first one's a decent 80s sci fi
(

H.B.Mupps, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:18, archived)

I like Dick.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 May 2017, 7:39, archived)

Evening
Do we still do evening threads?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 21:38, archived)

Seems like it
I wonder what teh gayshift are doing these days?
(

H.B.Mupps, Mon 8 May 2017, 21:39, archived)

I'm dying spanf.
Not twohats or tangles dying, but like, a bit ill.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 21:46, archived)

What's wrong Sexy Pig? Do you have penumonia?
That's a real cunt.

My ex has just told me for the millionth time I am not allowed to see my son this week, after initially complaining I don't see him enough.

I had to remind her that if I turn up at his nursery to pick him up, no one can stop me.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:05, archived)

Someone waving a court order can

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:14, archived)

Someone waving a court order might have their face removed

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 23:07, archived)

I will never die
Ever. Get well soon x
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 23:04, archived)

GOD DAMMIT I'M NOT GOING TO LOSE ANOTHER /TALK POSTER. BREATHE DAMN YOU, BREATHE!!!

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 May 2017, 0:30, archived)

pics.onsizzle.com/nyf0-live-dang-you-im-that-dude-on-the-left🙈😤-14562896.png
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 May 2017, 1:08, archived)

Oh boy, I sure hope so!

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 21:56, archived)

Alright dribble

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:05, archived)

Satisfactory
How are you're?
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:13, archived)

I am not sure what English this is
Can you please clarify?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:14, archived)

How are you are?

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:15, archived)

Yeah

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 23:07, archived)

I'm glad you made one
I was considering a new thread since about 8 of the clock
(

Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:18, archived)

It's going well

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 22:55, archived)

That's a sorry state of affairs

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 23:07, archived)

alright darling buds, that thread's dead

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:35, archived)

Alright Grrrmachine - I am going to turn over a new leaf.

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:39, archived)

try not to smoke this one

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:40, archived)

^fed up of rolling micras

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:42, archived)

lol, cars!

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:44, archived)

Your mind's guaranteed
It's all you'll ever need
So what do you want with me?
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:46, archived)

Why?

(immadme, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:30, archived)

I preferred the primitives

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:43, archived)

i wonder what the old boat update is going to be

(

mongychops, Mon 8 May 2017, 13:51, archived)

some tie in with that bomb beach game they make?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:02, archived)

Maybe resource bases

(

mongychops, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:14, archived)

will you stop playing if fish become a resource?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:27, archived)

nah they might turn into skeleton fish like larry

(

mongychops, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:29, archived)

gonna need a bigger one

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:17, archived)

House prices are falling!
Everybody panic!
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:02, archived)

Difficult not to take this personally

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:04, archived)

this is all your fault
you flooded the market
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:07, archived)

I am never speaking to an estate agent again
or any kind of agent, for that matter
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:12, archived)

Not even secret ones?

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:13, archived)

I wouldn't know, would I
that's what makes them secret
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:18, archived)

at least settle your newspaper bill

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:13, archived)

I steal Big Issues when the homeless isn't looking :(

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:19, archived)

it's rarely worth the cover price

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:27, archived)

I'm not really sure how complaining about the welfare state
and interviewing Billy Bragg has managed to sustain that magazine for as long as it has.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:30, archived)

has anyone ever bought it for reasons other than guilt and awkwardness?

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:32, archived)

It's the needlessly self-aggrandising title that annoys me.
It's no bigger than any other magazine and actually smaller than some.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:35, archived)

Poor hearing and tight shoes

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:36, archived)

page 3

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:39, archived)

I'm thinking of modernising by switching to using the internet for all my wanking needs

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:44, archived)

I can't afford the electricity

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:56, archived)

Ladyshave section of the argos it is then.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:57, archived)

I wank a lot less since we stopped getting Great Universal

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:58, archived)

not to mention Betterware

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:08, archived)

betterware is fucking hysterical
their shit is so bad, it's brilliant
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:28, archived)

and very very sexy

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:29, archived)

revolving sock racks get me rigid

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:32, archived)

betterware drinking game
everyone reads out the info on an item in the catalogue. if the words comfy, comfort or comfortable appear anywhere in the description, take a drink.
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:34, archived)

Cleeneze is even worse.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:43, archived)

i know, my ex used to sell it

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:46, archived)

They used to send really passive-aggressive notes asking for the catalogues back.
It's a little annoying given I didn't want the fucker in the first place.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:56, archived)

the people selling it have to buy their own catalogues
avon is the same
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:01, archived)

Sounds like a swiz.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:06, archived)

you make pennies if you're lucky

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:11, archived)

~~pennies if you're lucky~~ £500+ per week working from home, hours to suit
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:15, archived)

they should've thought of that before they decided to be so poor they had to work for Kleeneze

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:13, archived)

he only did it for weed money

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:34, archived)

He should've sold weed for weed money. Much less effort and higher on the social scale.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:38, archived)

he tried that
he got had off and beat up
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:40, archived)

it's ok I was planning to use my own

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:18, archived)

Imagine if you could set up some sort of 'wanking dynamo'
you'd be completely self-sufficient. Perpetual tugging.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:20, archived)

ideally it would also utilise the stuff that came out of my helmit too, so there was no wastage

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:24, archived)

smart

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:30, archived)

So it's a knock-off of The New Statesman then?

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:37, archived)

Dunno, I'm not a Commie.

(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:38, archived)

A consequence of rising living costs, apparently,
so we can blame brexit, as usual.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:08, archived)

My back feels a little bit stiff today
Is that because of brexit too?
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:19, archived)

Undoubtedly.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:30, archived)

If I ever meet Farage
I'm going to kick him in the cunt until he stops fucking moving
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:39, archived)

I know someone who claims to have called him a cunt. Farage cockily responded by saying 'you were never going to vote for me anyway', so he called him a cunt again.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:40, archived)

He must be used to it by now

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:43, archived)

Shame, really.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:46, archived)

Perhaps now is the time to overthrow the bourgeois.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:09, archived)

But I don't want to be overthrown.
This whole "out of touch, metropolitan elite" gig was going so well.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:11, archived)

I don't think the middle classes are ready to accept that they are part of the proletariat and join forces with the working class yet
perhaps once robots have taken all of the white collar jobs, but it'll probably be too late by then
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:13, archived)

The middle class really should get to grips with their superfluousness.
I'm not really bothered whether it's before or after they're all rounded up and put on an arc.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:16, archived)

Superfluousness?
Logically, only a small number of people can be rich, so you're suggesting that the vast majority of people should be poor. My God, man, you're a Tory.

Also, I'm not sure whether you're suggesting I should be put on a cruise, or fired from a trebuchet. Seeing as there's a question, I'm putting in for option A.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:21, archived)

^upset

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:35, archived)

The small number of rich people could probably stand to be a bit less rich.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:51, archived)

Well, yes.
But that implies the existence of a middle ground. Seeing as Micky boy here seems to think that that middle ground should be abolished, he logically believes therefore that everybody should be rich (impossible), or everybody should be poor.

A socialist, on the other hand, would seek for everybody to be in the middle, which is the only sustainable position.

What I'm really doing of course, is calling this chap a fucking idiot, albeit in a round about way.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:57, archived)

I expect Gormo sees the middle classes as a buffer put in place by the upper classes to protect themselves.
They sit pretty whilst we bicker amongst ourselves.

Socialism removes the class distinctions, does it not? If we were all middle class, nothing would ever get done, just project managed into infinity.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:07, archived)

^^^^^^

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:16, archived)

So you're agreeing with him that Socialism is inherently pointless.
Interesting.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:28, archived)

I don't think that was my point, at all.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:37, archived)

Objectivity is subjectivity, old bean.

(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:39, archived)

there aren't enough people at the very bottom to manage it on their own
plus, they'll need middle managers to help organise the rotas and things for the revolution
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:27, archived)

That's the thing with these revolutionaries,
they're all piss and vinegar and no planning.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:40, archived)

they wouldn't make it past the first pub

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:42, archived)

They might eventually get lucky and chase the farmers off the farm
but most of them will end up as horses and sheep and goats, and there will always be pigs.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:46, archived)

You'll be lying face down in the dirt like the rest of us come the food wars.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:47, archived)

Luckily my life of wealthy plenty has built up enough body fat
to ensure I'll outlive all those scrawny poor people and make a smooth transition into cannibalism.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:50, archived)

Always trust the fat survivalist.
It's why Mears is better than Fogle and Grylls.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:52, archived)

Ed Stafford is best

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:03, archived)

Nah, the fat ones will be eaten first.
Easy to catch, and deliciously marbled.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:09, archived)

haha
you'd better treat me with the respect I deserve and bring some bearnaise.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:12, archived)

I'd only ever cook you slowly.
"Love me tender" is my motto.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:17, archived)

just the ones in the immediate vicinity of your gaff

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:13, archived)

Couple of tiny, 3 bed newbuilds went for £450k each, at the bottom of my road.
The current market is obscene.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:18, archived)

they're all over the place
my Dad sold a manky 2-bed terrace in an ex-council estate in Thanet for more than my Mum's asking for her 3-bed detached in Deal, 10 miles down the coast. The only difference is that the first is in walking distance to a train station with a direct route to london, so it's those big smoke pricks driving up house prices 70 miles away.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:31, archived)

My house might just have tipped over the half million thanks to the train station across the road.
It's a tiny 2 bed terrace.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 14:34, archived)

We're selling the girlfriend's flat
after the fucking thing put on half again its original value, thanks to creeping gentrification and rumours of crossrail. There's no way it's worth the money, but make hay while the sun shines and all that.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:38, archived)

Better than continuing to profit from others labour simply through the ownership of shelter.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:39, archived)

^havenot

(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:40, archived)

Imagine paying money for the privilege of living in Thanet.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:18, archived)

Th J
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:19, archived)

Thanet being Thanet,
the strikey-g is an improvement.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:35, archived)

i like broadstairs

(

mongychops, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:44, archived)

So I've heard,
YDOB.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:45, archived)

I know a couple who lived in a Thanet until a few years ago
She's of caribbean heritage, and he's from northern ireland. Imagine that.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:45, archived)

Strikey-U!!!

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:29, archived)

poor thread

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:16, archived)

<s>r</s>
lol, poo!
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:19, archived)

¡Hola!
A guy I work with swears that David Jason is always next on the list to be collared by the police. He doesn't have any proof, he just believes that nobody can seem that nice.
(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:39, archived)

What, à la Yewtree? Sounds like clutching at straws to me.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:45, archived)

I don't think he is any danger (mouse)

(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:53, archived)

That whole business was just a way of trimming down the BBC's pension liability, mark my words.

(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:47, archived)

If so they would have taken out Andi Peters
Infact he should have had his tv career revoked for trashing TOTP.
(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:50, archived)

Who?

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 14:48, archived)

Del Boy.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:48, archived)

Damnit, why do no prisons rhyme with "aire"

(

fuscous, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:57, archived)

I saw a sign yesterday with a cartoon Del & Rodney on it
and it said "May We, Rodders!" on it. I cried a bit.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:57, archived)

What the fuck does that even mean?

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 14:58, archived)

Well it's supposed to be 'Mais Oui' isn't it
but the genius who created the ad clearly doesn't get the 'joke' that Del Boy was terrible at french. Which make me think...what did they think he meant?
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:14, archived)

Maybe they did get it.
Del would have probably spelled in the same way.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:19, archived)

Again, too clever

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:20, archived)

Copyright infringement at its worst
Worst
(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:04, archived)

Given the context of the joke in Only Fools and Horses, that actually might be quite clever.
Makes you think.
(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:05, archived)

While I agree with you in principle
I suspect the advert isn't quite as cerebral as that.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:09, archived)

Where's your faith in your fellow man, Two Hats?

(

Kroney, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:10, archived)

It was in Fratton, m8
Fratton.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:12, archived)

I thought Blackburn might have gone pinched
Again, no reason to suspect him, other than the fact that I think he's a cunt.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:16, archived)

Still quite amazing that he has a job, considering at the inquiry at the BBC in to dirty old men, his testimony
"Fell short of the standards of evidence that such an inquiry demanded."

That is good lawyers for you.
(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:27, archived)

I just did a really big poo.
Its left my insides feeling strange.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 15:57, archived)

And yet QOTW and the newsletter stubbornly refuse to die.
Still, it's nice to know rob still reads all the horrible things we say about him.
(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 May 2017, 16:36, archived)

morning

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 7:32, archived)

Morning.
Must say that I'm pleased to see the French haven't quite caught the "voting for the disastrous" bug.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 7:38, archived)

it's disappointing
only because a work colleague is French and had a good laugh at me post-Brexit, and now I can't turn the teasing tables on him.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 7:42, archived)

I see you're not a 'big picture' guy then.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:35, archived)

hardly
I'm living in a country that's systematically disgarding and dismantling the concepts of law and justice, and all the EU has done is send a commission to say "you are being VERY naughty, please stop". There is no sign this will stop before the very constitution of the country is changed, in ways that fundamentally copy Ergodan's recent tactics. I don't think a snot-nosed ex-banker in France is going to make much difference to this state of affairs.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:40, archived)

did you not hit the streets the other day?

(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:52, archived)

No one is more deserving of a slap than Mike Skinner.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:55, archived)

I thought it was keto flu until the wife came down with it too
so it seems like it was just a batch of Bad Cabbage
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:58, archived)

Yeah, I was relived when I saw that.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:36, archived)

Day off for Victory in Europe Day, fantastic.
The resonance of France celebrating for having kept the fascists out is delicious.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:34, archived)

it's about the only delicious thing in France, to be fair

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:40, archived)

Go away and have some kouign amann then come back and say that.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:47, archived)

I don't eat carbs mate, keep up

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:48, archived)

Snails in garlic butter it is, then.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:50, archived)

never again
I lived in Paris for a month and had that. I can still taste it on dark days :(
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:58, archived)

'kouign amann' had better be french for garlic bread, m8

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:52, archived)

Close enough.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:54, archived)

Wasn't he the UN secretary-general?

(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:54, archived)

I think you're thinking of Butteros Butteros-Garlic.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:56, archived)

¡Buono estente!

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:58, archived)

wassup bishes

(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:53, archived)

playa

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 8:56, archived)

", said the chef to the potwash boy.
"I'm not taking orders from you, you shouldn't even be here with that stinking cold", replied the potwash.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:01, archived)

«Greeting»

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:04, archived)

in HP ALM that's how you define a variable parameter
so I'm presuming this is a placeholder for Fuck You, so go fuck yourself drimble, I don't need your 'tude this morning
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:06, archived)

Hello hello

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 9:10, archived)

hey baby

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:14, archived)

Alright love.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 9:34, archived)

Did you have a nice weekend?

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:37, archived)

No.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 10:25, archived)

I'm sorry to hear that

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:51, archived)

what's all this then?

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:17, archived)

I don't know why you say goodbye

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:34, archived)

bonjour des camarades

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:31, archived)

fuck off back to Corbynistan

(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:33, archived)

we're actually spending Whitsun there

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:38, archived)

Small world
That's where I 'Michaelmas'
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:39, archived)

don't try and chummy up to those cretinous workshy turds
just because they had the decency not to vote for Hitler's senpai
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:33, archived)

just a few remaining people who remember what nazi occupation was like left to die off before LePen can win

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:40, archived)

They did wheel out a certain number of codgers during the election campaign to remind the yoof of teh evils of fascism etc.

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:01, archived)

So now that France is a Muslim country...

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 9:34, archived)

So I guess the question is this
Would you rather be french or muslim?
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:36, archived)

If you're going to be despised by the entire civilised world
there's no point denying yourself bacon sandwiches and booze as well
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:37, archived)

isn't there a rather racist song along these lines sung to the tune of el condor pasa?
er ... this question to mongy or mcbeef
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:38, archived)

oh god, I hope not

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:39, archived)

I'd rather be a paki than a scouse?

(

mongychops, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:03, archived)

that's the one
a charming little ditty
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:06, archived)

Neither, regime change pls

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:40, archived)

Jewish

(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:43, archived)

it's rather good news for mon oncle, who is an immigrant over there

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:36, archived)

don't be silly, only foreigners can be immigrants

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:49, archived)

at school he was only ever taught to use the impersonal form 'vous', rather than the familiar 'tu'
because you wouldn't ever want to be familiar with one of them
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:57, archived)

lol

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:58, archived)

Patrick Moore liked him

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:53, archived)

morning

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:43, archived)

hello MGT
couldn't get a picture up on that old Atari this weekend, can't be bothered fucking around with coax cables and trying to tune my TV into the right signal.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:47, archived)

www.amibay.com/showthread.php?42498-How-to-make-an-8-Bit-Atari-Audio-Video-Cable
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 May 2017, 9:54, archived)

huh, that might be why I couldn't get it to work
there's one of those midi-end cables included but with a single phono plug bodged on, and that wasn't working at all.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:12, archived)

the music to accompany this thread is:
On The Rebound by Floyd Cramer
(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:30, archived)

The students set up an art exhibition in the old stables over the weekend.
They're now annoyed that a lot of the art is cpvered in bird shit from the 4 families of housemartin living in there. I've been asked to do something about it.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 10:40, archived)

"Get down from there, Paul Heaton!"
hahahaha
(

$$ ✅, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:42, archived)

This isn't funny mate. This is my job.
Just because you metropolitan liberal elite can sit there in your rural semi and laugh at all thinking on, some of us have to work in the shit and the puss that you find so easy to satire on your radio 4 comedy programs and your bbc2 special editions.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 10:50, archived)

shoot the students and stash their bodies in the compost heap to feed the worms
then feed the worms to the housemartens
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:42, archived)

Just say "everyone's a critic" and leave it at that

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:52, archived)

Unless they want YOU to shit on it as well
try that
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 8 May 2017, 10:53, archived)

Good idea.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 8 May 2017, 11:01, archived)

HELLO!
isn't it a lovely sunny day?
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:41, archived)

Bit gay mate

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:56, archived)

camper than a row of tents

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:17, archived)

Bit cloudy here
Happy candles
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:00, archived)

cheers

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:18, archived)

Fucking stonker, gonna drink beer in the garden
Almost as hot as all those candles
(

H.B.Mupps, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:03, archived)

good plan

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:17, archived)

Think of the coal miners please

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:12, archived)

why?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:17, archived)

They wanna know what sun is

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:43, archived)

they're simple folk, they'd only worship it

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:44, archived)

Happy decade, Smash Monkey.
Did you use to be called something else, or are you mainly a /board person?
(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:18, archived)

mainly /board
with the occasional foray here. i don't do /links, though
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:26, archived)

Oh good heavens no, that place is a quagmire.

(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:28, archived)

well, quite

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:29, archived)

happy candleday!
i made this for you many years ago - s2.b3ta.com/host/creative/42873/1494165009/smashmonkey.jpg
(

sock more tea vicar?, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:50, archived)

ha!
i remember it well! :D
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:52, archived)

The doctor lost his arms

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 7 May 2017, 15:58, archived)

alright


                             .
                            ...
                          .......
                       .....:::.....
                   ....:::::::::::::....
                 ....:::::::::::::::::....
             ..::::::::::::  =  ::::::::::....
             ..::::::::::   ===   ::::::::::....
         ..::::::::::::    ======    ::::::::::....
         ..::::::::::    ===========    ::::::::...
       ..::::::::::   ================    ::::::::..
       ..::::::::::  ======= . =========   ::::::::...
     ..::::::::::  ========  |\  ========  :::::::::...
     ..::::::::::  ========  |#\ ========  :::::::::...
     .::::::::::  ========  /%#|  =======   :::::::::..
     .::::::::::  =======  /#%#|  =======   :::::::::..
     .::::::::::  ======  |#%#/  ========  :::::::::..
     ..:::::::::  ======   \%/  ========  :::::::::..
      ..:::::::::   ======  %  =======  ::::::::::..
       ..:::::::::    ===___%____===   ::::::::::..
        ..::::::::::    |  .::.  |   ::::::::::...
         .::::::::::    |  .::.  |   ::::::::::..
          ..::::::::    |  .::.  |   ::::::::...
           .::::::::    |  .::.  |   ::::::::..
             ...::::    |  .::.  |   ::::....
              ..::::    |  .::.  |   ::::...
                ....    |  .::.  |   ....
                  ..    |  .::.  |   ..

(

broadsword w⚓, Sun 7 May 2017, 15:28, archived)

oooooooo, nice!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 15:36, archived)

rofl it looks like a cunt underneath

(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 7 May 2017, 16:09, archived)

not the first place you'd want a lit candle

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 16:11, archived)

smashing candles

(

manolith hooray for me, Sun 7 May 2017, 15:47, archived)

aren't they?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 7 May 2017, 15:49, archived)

Only just got sunny here,

(

mongychops, Sun 7 May 2017, 17:37, archived)

cAnDLeS! cELeBrAtIoN!
It was sunny earlier but now it's not #thatsinteresting. To add insult to injury, I was unnecessarily conservative in my beer-purchasing this morning, with the result that I have currently run out.
(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Sun 7 May 2017, 17:38, archived)

Happy candles smasho

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sun 7 May 2017, 18:38, archived)

Happy candles innit

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 May 2017, 19:10, archived)

Alright mofs

(

mongychops, Sun 7 May 2017, 19:19, archived)

No it is the evening but happy b3ta anniversary anyway.
You're just under a month older than me in B3TA years
(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 7 May 2017, 19:54, archived)

You should delete your account, stay young forever

(

mongychops, Sun 7 May 2017, 20:08, archived)

Happy Candles etc...

(

Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Sun 7 May 2017, 20:08, archived)

last

(Hubert Blaine Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorff, Sr., Sun 7 May 2017, 20:52, archived)

christmas

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:22, archived)

I

(

CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:29, archived)

Died

(

Cheers Cheers, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:33, archived)

Shit
Sorry mate, I didn't know
(

CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:36, archived)

RIP

(

Cheers Cheers, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:42, archived)

heart

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 7 May 2017, 21:46, archived)

Always

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sun 7 May 2017, 22:13, archived)

Morning
I'm off to bed
(

H.B.Mupps, Sun 7 May 2017, 4:07, archived)

I've just finished work, now I have to go on a course, on a Sunday
fuck me dead
(

Major Turd for tonight only, Sun 7 May 2017, 7:27, archived)

I was rudely awakened by two children firing nerf darts, and a dog jumping on the bed.
I don't think I really appreciated lazy Sunday mornings until it was too late.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 7 May 2017, 8:17, archived)

I got woken up at 6am with a titty-twister
and it wasn't from my wife :(
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 7 May 2017, 9:16, archived)

Having a pussy blowout, huh?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 7 May 2017, 9:59, archived)

sick

(

$$ ✅, Sun 7 May 2017, 10:10, archived)

+rik

(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:20, archived)

Might get out of bed soon.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sun 7 May 2017, 10:55, archived)

I'm up now
Guardians of the Galaxy 2 was a visual spectacle with a paper thin plot
(

H.B.Mupps, Sun 7 May 2017, 12:50, archived)

I watched Captain America Civil war last night
That's it, I'm done with superhero movies, it was so fucking dull I took a break to watch some paint dry to get my heart rate up enough to keep watching.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:06, archived)

Logan was pretty good, had a very different tone as far as superhero flicks go
Its hard to depict the bombastic and over the top action when the main character is depressed and addicted to painkillers, and Patrick Stewart plays a very good mentally burned out Professor X
(

H.B.Mupps, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:22, archived)

I thought Logan was utter utter shit.
I think at one point they just put the swears in to try to get people's blood pumping.

The terrible car chases thrown in again just to give it some "oomph" were completely pointless.

Steven Merchants character just didn't seem to need to have ever existed .

And the little girl, I just wanted to kick her in the fucking head. What a misedvsle character.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sun 7 May 2017, 13:59, archived)

She really is misedvsle
I enjoyed it anyway
(

H.B.Mupps, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:02, archived)

I think what happened there was I suffered a mini stroke as I got to that word.
Which reminds me trying to have a text conversation in hospital while on high doses of morphine.

They were some odd sentences.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sun 7 May 2017, 14:04, archived)

Of all the days
I've been AOL, I choose today.
(Pytchblend Had Tarmac for tea, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:01, archived)

Oh

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:19, archived)

I've been America OnLine a couple of times myself

(

$$ ✅, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:21, archived)

I was banned from 4chan
Anything is possible
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:22, archived)

www.thesun.co.uk/news/3488318/pokemon-go-child-porn-stash-troll-4chan/
(

$$ ✅, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:23, archived)

Wow, I thought they had no standards at all but clearly they do.

(

Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Sat 6 May 2017, 20:24, archived)

All Out of Lard?
how will you wrestle now?
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:24, archived)

~~how will you wrestle now~~ So lost without you.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:02, archived)

i know, m8, i know

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:12, archived)

Its ok
I've brought my own elastic band.
(Pytchblend Had Tarmac for tea, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:06, archived)

no-one here knows who you are
Who are you?
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:34, archived)

YM

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:55, archived)

I tried that st, very nice ,my mate thinks I should try the astra before choosing

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:30, archived)

yeah, I've heard good things about the Astra too
but you're more likely to lose a few grand when you sell it on, just like the French hot hatches (cup Clios etc).
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 17:55, archived)

I just fancy a hot hatch, 5k, I've got my van , and my focus estate, seems pointless to have 2 fishing wagons

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 18:00, archived)

If it's 5k you're gonna lose 1k whatever you buy I spose
so try the Astra and try a french one too, and see which one you like the feel of the most.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 18:27, archived)

Will do, it's just for fun, that's why I said 5, can't get a new Rolex for that now days

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 18:48, archived)

Are you giving out unwanted CDs?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:03, archived)

Yes, but
only if nobody wants one.
(Pytchblend Had Tarmac for tea, Sat 6 May 2017, 23:31, archived)

We used to call it, get this, 'GayOL'! Oh, the 90's..
(Enron Hubbard had a big meaty piss on, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:20, archived)

alright 'the flintstones title sequence'

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 6 May 2017, 20:04, archived)

You want freeserve mate

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 16:34, archived)

Joanna lumley or the American one?

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Sat 6 May 2017, 17:21, archived)

the AOLs are not what they seem

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 21:27, archived)

In your face AOL (or whoever normally gets it)

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 6 May 2017, 22:01, archived)

AOL to the chimp.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 23:41, archived)

afternoon

(

willenium Fist bump for verification, Sat 6 May 2017, 14:46, archived)

Alright will,
I'm posting in your thread because that guy seems weird.
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 15:04, archived)

*nods*

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 6 May 2017, 15:12, archived)

Morn

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 8:38, archived)

Sup

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 8:40, archived)

Word

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 8:54, archived)

Its nearly beer festival time

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:27, archived)

got a specific beer type you're interested in?
or just getting smashed on cheap lager?
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:31, archived)

The won't sell lager there

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:35, archived)

might do a decent pils though
didn't think IPAs were your bag
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:38, archived)

I'll be on the cider

(

mongychops, Sat 6 May 2017, 10:21, archived)

has brok

(

.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Sat 6 May 2017, 8:42, archived)

Yeto

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 8:54, archived)

hi

(

$$ ✅, Sat 6 May 2017, 8:48, archived)

Dollar dollar bill y'all

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 8:54, archived)

Shiggidy shiggidy shwaa

(

H.B.Mupps, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:05, archived)

Wacka wacka wacka

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 9:08, archived)

You are a raven AICMFP
(

H.B.Mupps, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:56, archived)

ello

(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:34, archived)

No longer morning.
But hi
(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 12:27, archived)

I am hungerover to fuck.

(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:37, archived)

Get back on it.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 12:27, archived)

Jambo

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 6 May 2017, 9:40, archived)

There's a snake in my boot.

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 12:27, archived)

GS?

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 6 May 2017, 12:31, archived)

Always

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 12:33, archived)

Hello, Windy, et al.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 6 May 2017, 10:24, archived)

Alright momun

(

Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 6 May 2017, 12:27, archived)

Alright

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 3:11, archived)

Theresa May is a bellend

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:28, archived)

Women shouldn't body shame other women , men can do that

(

mongychops, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:32, archived)

it's not literally about her glans,
it's just a metaphor
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:34, archived)

alright mgt

(

vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:32, archived)

alright vladimir

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:33, archived)

Wasn't there a shit hipster band called MGT?

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:35, archived)

dunno,
i was probably called MGT before you even heard of them though
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:37, archived)

I think that's probably true
Yet I still wish it was those that were a member here :)
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:40, archived)

MGMT.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:39, archived)

That's the fucking one
I could have googled it like but thanks
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:40, archived)

I know, I spoil you, don't I?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:58, archived)

Well. You tell me the name of bands.
Spoiling me would be offering to pay off all my debts and then giving me a sad and self loathing hand job.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:06, archived)

Moon Cirl 5echnologies

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 6 May 2017, 1:17, archived)

Nice

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 2:05, archived)

More so than the people who vote for her and her party?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:40, archived)

yeah it's basically all her fault that people vote for her party,
she's the one doing it
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:45, archived)

I'd like to agree, but she seems to have gone out of her way to be utterly fucking awful,
yet people are still willing to vote for her. I can't honestly lay the blame squarely at her feet.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:57, archived)

yeah you're right actually,
it's kind of inexplicable. Had a very weird conversation with my gran the other night. She likes Theresa May. She is "level-headed" apparently. Jeremy Corbyn, on the other hand... ooh she doesn't like him. She just doesn't. His policies, she doesn't like his policies. Can't even name a single one of them, but doesn't like them all the same.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:01, archived)

Yeah reactionaries love may because she's 'strong'*.
*a bully with no real firmly held beliefs or any will to take in what's currently happening around them.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:29, archived)

what I genuinely don't understand, right, is
how on earth anyone can fall for the strong and stable line. I mean, really, how, how, how? they have managed to borrow more than ever, capitulate to the frothing extremists living in the fetid damp far wing of their party, by holding a referendum the rules of which were presumably drafted by someone who had only had descriptions from the foreign and run through google translate of how it should be done to guide them, and as a result landed a situation for the currently U'd K whereby it is about to get downgraded in a wholesale and rather painful manner, is about to possibly have scotland separate, and where there is actual discussion of the faint possibility of ireland uniting at some point and nobody has blown anybody up yet as a result of that and nobody's been on the news pretending to be jerry adams by being backlit and miming. strong and stable? are you fucking kidding me?
(

vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:41, archived)

oh and while I'm at this, they also landed a situation where we were THIS CLOSE to ANDREA LEADSOME and BORIS JOHNSON being nearly the PRIME MINISTER.
(

vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:42, archived)

fuck I've just read all that back and it's almost worse to think I haven't made it up

(

vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:45, archived)

Are you ok mate?

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:47, archived)

I'm fine, just breathing into this paper bag and thinking nice calming thoughts about how in two hundred and fifty years none of this will matter

(

vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:48, archived)

I wouldn't worry about that mate.
You probably have about 15/20 left tops anyway.

Me...approximately 5.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:01, archived)

five? brilliant, bucket list time!!! \o/
climb a dolphin
swim with machu picchu
watch the sunset over cleethorpes
get all the ironing done
tell everyone just exactly what you think of them
(

vladimir, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:13, archived)

One out of five ain't bad

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:26, archived)

Imagine if they fuck it up so bad the Irish manage to put their sectarian differences aside and come together.
That'd be hilarious.
(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:26, archived)

Most people are idiots, vlad.
It's democracy's great failing.
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monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:44, archived)

please tell me it isn't troooo :(

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vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:46, archived)

well apparently only 15% of people can even remember hearing the "Strong and Stable" mantra,
the chances of them having the faintest clue what the Tories have done and what they stand for are presumably even more slim.
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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:47, archived)

Why didn't they refuse the election? It's like they might have a longer term plan , but being reactionary is the current thing

(

mongychops, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:49, archived)

that's what i thought.
they should have said, no you have to carry on, we'll put in a vote of no confidence when you screw up Brexit.
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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:53, archived)

But is that not what they are doing? Looks like it to me,

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mongychops, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:59, archived)

yeah they are screwing up Brexit already,
but they somehow manage to hide that fact from most people, it's Rupert bloody Murdoch i bet. I hope it will become obvious soon enough, problem is people want to believe her. Now she's coming out with batshit crazy stuff about Brussels trying to interfere with the election and whatnot, i know what will happen, it will all go to shit, and everyone will blame Europe for it, and the Tories will pass some sort of enabling act.
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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:05, archived)

yes, intefering in the election here
ahem, WHY WOULD THEY WANT TO DO THAT
there's literally no reason anywhere, anywhen, they couldn't give a shit, we started this fucking nonsense and why the hell they would want to bother with swinging things in any direction in this country while its clearly in the middle of a full-on shaving-its-head-and-speaking-in-tongues nervous breakdown, is quite beyond me, oh god I have to get the paper bag again
(

vladimir, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:18, archived)

she's just throwing a fucking tantrum because they can't just give her everything she wants

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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:46, archived)

See when it all goes to proper actual shit.
That's when it'll be remains fault for not putting up a more convincing argument.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:20, archived)

Also this snap election is almost certainly about getting more tories in so there's less opposition when they reapeal/rewrite all the bits of EU legislation they've enveloped that they don't like.

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Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:21, archived)

it's also maybe a bit about
that whole 30 MPs being investigated by the CPS for electoral fraud thing
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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:44, archived)

Everyone would've forgotten about that by the next election.

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Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:48, archived)

yeah but they only have a majority of 18,
30 by-elections would have been entertaining
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Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:50, archived)

I can't stand this new world of shameless reality bending as if saying something out loud enough times it makes it true
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vladimir, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:50, archived)

Go live in China

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mongychops, Fri 5 May 2017, 23:51, archived)

B3ta is on a comeback course

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spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:07, archived)

At the same time that mantra kept families together for years.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:23, archived)

I dunno.
Why does Corbyn's policies poll really well but people go 'well yeah that's all good, but he seems faintly ineffectual, so because of that I'm going to vote for people who hate me and want me to die'.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:18, archived)

pffffft
I think this cake I am thinking of buying might be a bit disappointing, so instead of buying it I am going to run onto a motorway into the path of speeding lorries
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vladimir, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:22, archived)

Yeah, pretty much.

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Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:24, archived)

Alright 'mock the week'.

(

Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 6 May 2017, 0:16, archived)

I'm not a fan

(

broadsword w⚓, Sat 6 May 2017, 4:17, archived)

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