I just ate a big bag of Frazzles and now my wee smells like smoky bacon crisps.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 May 2025, 15:10, archived)

I just curled one out on a coipu
and now my smeggy bellend smells like a shit wank cunt gufftit
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:20, archived)

Such poetry!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

what time do you call this?
"The awkward interview added to the attention and curiosity that has followed the 73-year-old Belichick,
hired as the Tar Heels’ head coach in December after his ultra-successful run with the New England Patriots,
and the 24-year-old Hudson, who has frequently posted glimpses into their relationship with social media photos".
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:42, archived)

Hey I was about to post that

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:50, archived)

Bill, I'm begging you, no more glimpses into your relationship pls

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 May 2025, 16:39, archived)

Bill certainly loves a Bella-chick!

( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 16:13, archived)

Look what the cat dragged in

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2025, 16:08, archived)

Piss on me

( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:20, archived)

I mean
how much do they cost?
( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

£1.25 in Budgens

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

*unzips*

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

.. piss of God,
fill me with life anew, that I may love the way you love, and do what you would do.
(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:41, archived)

wwjpo

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:42, archived)

Hello new person
please read the FAQ
( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

Gunt yourself, gunt yourself HARD.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 May 2025, 15:22, archived)

Billy Gunter of Gheyfriars

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:23, archived)

Consult your doctor

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:50, archived)

I AM BOU!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:43, archived)

I hope not

( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:08, archived)

Madame Bouvary, c'est moi

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:37, archived)

Confession time
I'm the Bou that showed up 8 months ago
But I'm not the Bou of the old days
I came here to troll you.
(Bou IsBanned, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:01, archived)

And the Bou that called shambles
Is not the original bou
(Bou IsBanned, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:04, archived)

My my my

(Bou IsBanned, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:05, archived)

ooh good confession time \o/
I buried them all in the top field
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:21, archived)

waitwait no everyone ignore that
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 14:21, archived)

I think it's fairly safe to say that everyone will ignore this whole thread

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:21, archived)

lol

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:38, archived)

morning

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 5:56, archived)

HAPPY MAY MORNING!
MAY the sun shine on you all summer and MAY your harvest be rich and bountiful, and store well, right through all the dark bits
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 6:25, archived)

Cheers

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 6:36, archived)

:)

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 6:46, archived)

i'd be too hot i wouldn't like that

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Thu 1 May 2025, 7:09, archived)

yeah you would don’t lie

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 7:20, archived)

then, just for you, instead I wish
just the correct amount of sun
heat enough for you to relish
but not so much it isn't fun
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:51, archived)

(because, of course, when far away
the sun makes life and days and hay
but if too close you'd somehow flown
it'd burn the flesh clean off your bones
then powder them with hot persistence
some things are best loved from a distance)
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:58, archived)

But some are best to love up-close
Like hot tea from your favourite mug
Or people that we like the most
By giving them a special hug
And then your day cannot be bad
Because you had a hug with vlad

…imir
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:11, archived)

OMG
*HUGSSSSS*
*dies, simply dies clean away of joy*
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:18, archived)

lol bum

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 May 2025, 12:58, archived)

I had to concentrate so hard not to type bum instead of burn SO HARD

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 13:02, archived)

lol hard

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 13:02, archived)

like an erect member
or a corpse
( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 13:03, archived)

but why have to choose

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 13:03, archived)

my bits are a little darker as it happens

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:30, archived)

Same. I think that comes with age

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:31, archived)

probably down to lack of use
If you're not careful they'll shrivel up and fall off. Use it or lose it m8
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 May 2025, 17:17, archived)

beautiful

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:48, archived)

This is the sort of uplifting post I can get behind
or in front of, or beside, or wherever the most supportive place is to be regarding this post.

Morning everyone.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:50, archived)

all those places sound just fine

( vladimir, Thu 1 May 2025, 13:22, archived)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 1 May 2025, 7:48, archived)

morning

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:32, archived)

As predicted. Yesterday's fleeing moment of feeling flush has passed like a turd down the u-bend
all the big bills have been paid and it's back to living the Lidl lifestyle.

Morning.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:35, archived)

yo

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:04, archived)

Happy International Workers' Day!

( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 8:46, archived)

I’m working as I type this

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:04, archived)

Good

( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 10:48, archived)

Up the workers!
Privileged classes, sitting on their arses!

lol
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:23, archived)

disgusting
wanna cyber?
( $$ ✅, Thu 1 May 2025, 10:48, archived)

Erm....yes, I believe that I do

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 May 2025, 10:55, archived)

GEOSTORM

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:17, archived)

It's actually rather sunny 🌞

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 1 May 2025, 10:02, archived)

There's always a GEOSTORM somewhere

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 1 May 2025, 11:32, archived)

right, i'm going to bed.
seeing as there's nobody here i'll just say bollocks
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:53, archived)

Tug one out for me

( MrA, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:57, archived)

i'm too tired soz

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:59, archived)

Part timer
Pathetic
( MrA, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:59, archived)

ok i've got a stiffy now

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:01, archived)

Chilli oil
A Hanes manual for a Vauxhall corsa
The music of Enya

You have 5 mins to compete the task.
( MrA, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:36, archived)

I'm here

( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:07, archived)

now I'm not

( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:10, archived)

Burn this witch

( mongychops, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:19, archived)

mongy I'm too fruity to burn ;)

( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 22:33, archived)

Too soon, Freddie

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 23:39, archived)

Bit of a scorcher today eh?

(Planearm, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 18:01, archived)

Very clammy

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 18:39, archived)

lol clam

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:00, archived)

Still on the buses ?

( mongychops, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:32, archived)

I'LL GET YOU, BUTLER!

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:52, archived)

leave my butler alone
i need him to sew my buttons on
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:54, archived)

LOL
butt
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:56, archived)

and that as well

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:57, archived)

LOL
swell
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:01, archived)

I almost convinced myself there was a band called swollen member
I was thinking of throbbing gristle
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:09, archived)

is there one called spastic sister?

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:21, archived)

yes thankyou

(Planearm, Thu 1 May 2025, 19:46, archived)

Yeah, too warm for this cat

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:36, archived)

Stompin' that nonsense
So. I have never been keen on powered saws. I've avoided using them since an accident when I was 16 when my dad nearly severed all the fingers on my right hand with a chainsaw (I've never let him forget that). Anyway. I've just bought a cheap circular saw from Screwfix because we have a project that I'll need to use it on.

What have you done recently that you think was a fucking stupid idea?
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:52, archived)

you won't forget about the friday quiz because of this will you?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:55, archived)

I like that this is a quiz question

( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:01, archived)

Is this a quiz question?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:06, archived)

What do you think?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:10, archived)

Who asked you?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:14, archived)

Weren't you asking me?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:32, archived)

What of it if I was?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:42, archived)

Wouldn't that justify me asking what you think?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:44, archived)

I've got a mitre saw I bought to make picture frames
I am almost certain I'm going to lose a fingertip at some point
(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:57, archived)

It's quite easy to have fewer limbs after misusing one of these fuckers
good grief, I really don't like the buggers.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:01, archived)

It's really fun when an angle grinder or circular saw kicks back at you
really makes your heart go
(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:05, archived)

logged into b3ta

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:58, archived)

good lord it would at this stage be far quicker for me to list the things I've done recently that I *didn't* think were a fucking stupid idea
( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:00, archived)

Eating a baked potato before work

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:31, archived)

Well as long as you didn't eat two and then run yourself over while being sick.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 16:10, archived)

Fuuuuuuuck
Just got into work and found out one of the men has been killed. Only had the job for 3 weeks and got a container to the head.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 17:20, archived)

Fuck.
What makes it worse is that I tried to click “reply” but clicked “I like this” instead with my fat hands. I don’t like this.

Hope you’re okay.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 17:48, archived)

It's a bit of a...I don't want to say head wrecker
But it absolutely is. Just got off the phone with my brother, who worked with him. It wasn't a container, it was a 60 ton forklift of some kind.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 18:30, archived)

Fucking hell, that's grim.
Any idea how it happened?
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 19:13, archived)

Not yet
But I've trained on forklifts, there's no way it should have fallen over, unless he was going too fast and tried to turn, or if it wasn't properly loaded
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 19:28, archived)

forklifts are definitely something you want to be on and not under
i've also got a forklift ticket, well, expired obvs.
bit like that guy... boom boom
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 20:55, archived)

<s>uc</s> or

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Thu 1 May 2025, 15:22, archived)

Fuck's sake now it's on the popular page.
Sorry Smonkey.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:19, archived)

classic b3ta

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 1 May 2025, 7:23, archived)

trying to fart the alphabet

( $$ ✅, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:38, archived)

My thread is better than yours you massive shit.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:53, archived)

then how come his is on top, hmmm?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:57, archived)

your monitor is upside down.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 16:12, archived)

I came {this} close to cutting through my leg with an electric saw
It was terrifying. I laughed out loud when it happened, which I'm pretty sure was a nerve response
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 16:05, archived)

I find this story distressing
It's distracting me from International Jazz Day
( $$ ✅, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 16:12, archived)

Something something something scat

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 16:23, archived)

Severed jazz hands!

( .Yeti., Wed 30 Apr 2025, 19:34, archived)

Tell me your full name and address,
just for fun like.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:25, archived)

Sittin' on the doxx of the bay, etc.

( .Yeti., Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:29, archived)

doxxter who?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:49, archived)

Chester A Aardvark
15 Tiramisu Lane
Bungle
P3 N15
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:55, archived)

Vladimir Nabokov
Flat Three, The Sea front
Saint-Elusiveau-sur-Mer
France
On the way to the US imminently
( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:03, archived)

arseboon dilbaro
69 Semen Khaidenko Way
b3ta
AN4 1LY
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:14, archived)

Misery Cunt
Humpteen to Humpty Dumpty Two
Purley Way
Croyden
CU NEXT TUESDAY
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 21:24, archived)

PERINEUM-PARMESAN

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:19, archived)

Bollock Brie

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:23, archived)

Morning. I'm rich! Rich!!! Rich beyond my wildest dreams!!!!*
*No Garold, it's an illusion, you've just been paid and your bank balance looked great for about 10 minutes... By the afteroon it will all be back to the usual economy-class lifestyle.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:40, archived)

I get a tiny raise from this month
Only about £1 an hour, but still, extra money is extra money
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 9:18, archived)

Well it's better than a punch in the tits, I guess.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 11:30, archived)

Very much so

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 12:02, archived)

Eat the rich!

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 12:38, archived)

TAINT TREACLE

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:55, archived)

BIFFON BUFFALO MOZARELLA

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:57, archived)

STINKY-BRIDGE STILTON

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 9:58, archived)

honestly it strikes me that everyone here is so fixated on
and horrified by The Body that the personal hygiene situation is not one of under-, but in fact one of over-washing, with most scrubbing themselves in a terrified frenzy multiple times a day
( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:21, archived)

^definitely has perineum-parmesan

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:23, archived)

you're drawn, though, aren't you. fascinated, like a moth sighting an outside light
just flutter a little closer. what harm could it do. don't worry about that strange smell, it's definitely not your wings burning
( vladimir, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:31, archived)

Are people really horrified by Jesse "The Body" Ventura?
Is that because he successfully moved from professional wrestling into acting and then politics?
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:48, archived)

and a massive conspiracy theorist

( $$ ✅, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:50, archived)

Yeah well you would say that since you're one of those lizard people that did 9/11.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 11:02, archived)

I likes it when he says he's a god damn sexual tyrannosaurus
lol
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 11:28, archived)

Peckerino
I dunno the elements are there I just don't have the time, soz
( $$ ✅, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 10:50, archived)

Man-chego.
/ac
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 11:30, archived)

has anyone said GOOCH GOUDA yet?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 11:34, archived)

They probably should.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 12:59, archived)

b3ta.com/search/talk?q=Gooch+gouda
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 30 Apr 2025, 15:16, archived)

wtvo?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 14:51, archived)

Also Mike Peters out…
That’s one alarm that won’t be going off tomorrow morning.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 21:48, archived)

Have you considered suicide?
It's very underrated, I hear.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 22:31, archived)

From who?

( mongychops, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 0:12, archived)

he hears dead ppl
they'll probably make a film about it one day
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 6:27, archived)

I think some of those reviews might be fake

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 0:28, archived)

FAKE VIEWS

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 6:51, archived)

I see you've done all the most obvious jokes in the one post, what are we supposed to do now?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 0:30, archived)

Attend the funeral. There will be 34 people there, two rolls each to that'll be
68 Buns!!!!
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 30 Apr 2025, 8:31, archived)

Flibby dibby fwub fwub brrrrrrrrr
Goes that modern UK Garage music.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 21:43, archived)

I stayed out in the sun too long!
Is it true that smeg is good for sunburn?
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:51, archived)

Yes, that's absolutely true.
I stay indoors all the time, constantly rubbing smegma all over myself, and I never get sunburned.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:55, archived)

Great, now I just need A LOT of smeg
Where is queef?
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:59, archived)

Right here
*queefs*
( broadsword now that's fresh, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 19:06, archived)

I doubt it
Aloe Vera or a good moisturiser will help
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 20:36, archived)

or a cooling bath with a few packets of polos stirred in

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 21:08, archived)

Hello Bou here
I caused the blackout in Spain
Shit
Took the wrong plugs I'm sure
How are you?
(Bou IsBanned, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:10, archived)

Ever wanted to fly your own starship?
Oh. Well then never mind
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:25, archived)

I don’t even own an starship
but if I did I wouldn’t need your permission to fly it, thank you very much.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:35, archived)

I'd love to, but what would I wear?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:42, archived)

STARSHIP TROUSERS

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:13, archived)

Nice but I was looking for HEBTROCO I'm afraid. How about this: what would I drink?
, TROUSERS
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:32, archived)

i have some hebtroco socks
they're very nice. i'm wearing them now, in fact
( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:56, archived)

Nice but I was looking for PACT COFFEE ☕️💩👍🏻

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 19:40, archived)

oh right

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 19:57, archived)

Sure

( $$ ✅, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:48, archived)

NO THANKS NOT TODAY
*waves hand*
(Bou IsBanned, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 18:08, archived)

66 guns

( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:50, archived)

IT'S BEER OF THE COCK O'CLOCK COCK COCK COCK!

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:13, archived)

Beer of the cock?
You mean piss, you piss drinking shit.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:34, archived)

GEOPISS

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:35, archived)

it's the taste!

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 15:00, archived)

Lunchtime!
Might microwave a mushroom muffin.

How bout yous
( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 12:58, archived)

Might shit on a shrew

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:08, archived)

Probably lunch on a lasagne

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:11, archived)

lunch is for wimps

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:14, archived)

Do I have to say something alliterative?
Because if so, I might munch some milky minced melons.

Otherwise I'm having a sandwich.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:24, archived)

Is it a sausage sandwich?
Could you try slobbering it?
( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:52, archived)

No it was ham.
Something about hammering a haunch of ham? I don't know, I'm not a word-wizard.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:10, archived)

I had ham and cheese toasties and a scotch egg
sorry, I mean I fellated a pheasant
(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:27, archived)

f ph
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:28, archived)

-h

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:40, archived)

am and cheese

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:04, archived)

-e

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:41, archived)

chese

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:04, archived)

sm+

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:12, archived)

-s +r

( MiseryCunt no alarms and no sausages, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 14:14, archived)

cheere

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 17:05, archived)

it's breakfast, it's cannabis

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:40, archived)

+ it's Crackerjack

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 13:43, archived)