bollocks

( MiseryCunt, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 13:49, archived)

Gunt

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 14:38, archived)

Arse fart widdle

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 14:46, archived)

Check it out now!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 20 Jul 2025, 14:46, archived)

that's a Lord Finesse sample m8
YOUR WELCOME
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 15:11, archived)

his welcome what?

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 15:31, archived)

*whom

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 17:01, archived)

Yeh i no

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 17:33, archived)

...it's me, I'm Cathy
I've come home, I'm so cold
Let me in your window
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 15:25, archived)

Is it "for shitting fucks sake" or "for shitting fuck's sake"?
It's for a work email, it needs to look professional.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 17:34, archived)

"I hope this shitting fuck finds you well"

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 18:17, archived)

Ode to a Nightingale by John Keats is absolute arsewater
This is what keeps me up at night
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 4:11, archived)

Away, away! such reeking knobstench
Ooh, that's a snazzy bouquet
I've done a shit+fart in a forest
Thou smeggy wankstain
My classical-literature-referencing bellend honks of ancient gruyere
How fucking cool am I
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 4:19, archived)

I mean, that's pretty good tbh

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 4:21, archived)

just getting ready to sleep here
i've never read it but i believe you
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 4:20, archived)

I'm livid m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 4:23, archived)

morning

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 6:14, archived)

I'm self-publishing as I type this

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:11, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:21, archived)

gooch gouda

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:39, archived)

James sub-Prime

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:52, archived)

morning

( broadsword now that's fresh, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:35, archived)

fo realsies

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:40, archived)

Ode to a NightingGAY, I call it!!

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 8:48, archived)

Gone Keats :'-(

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 10:29, archived)

Real+

#SubPrime
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 16:59, archived)

^ beaker full of the warm South

( .Yeti., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 10:46, archived)

I prefer Ode to Flavia

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 11:25, archived)

Craig Mack was gr8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 13:41, archived)

Bollocks?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 21:49, archived)

bollocks!

( MiseryCunt, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 22:08, archived)

One of my bollocks
- a bollock - hurts a bit, as if I had a fucking hernia AGAIN.

I'm fucking sick of hernia ops. I've had 4 hernias "repaired" and none of it has managed to last more than a year.
( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 22:27, archived)

You’ll have to rely on b bollock

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 23:15, archived)

I've currently got epididymitis for the 3rd time
fucking well bored with that
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 23:17, archived)

fucking well bored with that tattyfilarious!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 10:47, archived)

Don't give yourself a hernia m8

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 20 Jul 2025, 11:16, archived)

Bollocks!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 23:16, archived)

I hope everyone is having a well dibnah Saturday
I had to work in the pissing rain, it was pretty smeg.

Pub now though, Vietnamese dinner in a bit. Not so bad

u
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:32, archived)

I was born in a banh, mi
Googling the spelling of that I came across references to "Vietnamese egg coffee"
YOU MUST ORDER THIS
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:37, archived)

sm+

( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:46, archived)

Really it's just smeg. The coffee is for afterwards, to wash it down.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:53, archived)

Fuck that noise

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:58, archived)

Terrible disrespect of Vietnamese ovulate beverages

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 20:51, archived)

#infest

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 20:59, archived)

Just told my mate that I won't be going to Blackpool for the weekend with her
She took it better than expected
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 18:41, archived)

so who are you going with?

( MiseryCunt, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 3:36, archived)

Smegg Wallace
Could you imagine?
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 3:43, archived)

no m8

( MiseryCunt, Sun 20 Jul 2025, 14:20, archived)

Just found an LV purse on the street
I thought only rich people had these... there was 4p in it
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sat 19 Jul 2025, 13:51, archived)

had to google that as LV is car insurance to me
probably a knock off
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 14:06, archived)

I thought as much...
...still, 4p though
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sat 19 Jul 2025, 14:27, archived)

That’s lvnch sorted

( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 14:30, archived)

Oh bravo

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 14:55, archived)

Lvdia Lvnch?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:37, archived)

55+4=59

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:09, archived)

when you say it like that, it's obvious

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:36, archived)

Whoah, steady on there, Carl Friedrich Gauss!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:36, archived)

hang on let me google something

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:44, archived)

I don't get it

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 16:45, archived)

Let's hear what David Minger, Ph.D. has to say on the subject shall we?
Minger's hot take
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:32, archived)

Is he related 2 Ralf Minge??

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 20:18, archived)

That’s mine mate.

(Chocco The Real Spanishfy, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 15:51, archived)

morning

( MiseryCunt, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:09, archived)

Not for very much longer

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:25, archived)

You Rocky Horror prick

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:37, archived)

It's just a jump to the left / And then a step to the right
'So I’ve watch this movie for the first time and I love it! Is the Time Warp something the Transylvanians
do anytime they travel to another planet? Is it some kind of celebration and they just call it that? When they say “again”,
I’m assuming it’s something they do anytime they get someone new. Dr Scott mentioned them trying to perfect a transducer
but if they can Time Warp they already perfected it right? '
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:43, archived)

You Rocky Horror prick

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:47, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8453308
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 12:48, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8453308
( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 14:31, archived)

YOUR BLOCKED

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 17:33, archived)

FAKE NEWS!

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⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠷⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⢸⣦⡡⠠⢄⣀⣠⠶⠋⢹⡇⢸⡏⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣝⣠⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⠾⠝⡏⠀⠀⠈⡇⠘⢱⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣰
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢉⣿⣿⣭⡉⠀⠀⢰⠁⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⢸⣷⠀⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⣄⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⢸⣯⡷⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠊⣇⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠈⠛⢦⡀⠀⠀⢻⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⡏⠻⣆⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠿⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⡐⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠃⠀⢸⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⡷⣤⢹⣧⢀⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⡏⣷⠞⠹⢿⣿⣿⣷⣯⣯

( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 12:24, archived)

invisible ink!

( MiseryCunt, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 12:33, archived)

You Rocky Horror prick

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 12:44, archived)

Scattered pictures, of the smiles we left behind, bleurgh I'm dead
Alan Bleurghman
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 0:32, archived)

Alas Bergman

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 1:25, archived)

I don't think I'm allowed to play, soz

( mongychops, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 1:48, archived)

nor is alan now

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 2:49, archived)

The Way He Was

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 8:10, archived)

Alan Deadman
I’ve no idea who this is

i wa
( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 8:39, archived)

Wa've, mm etc

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 8:51, archived)

RIP

( Cheers Cheers, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 8:53, archived)

Me neither

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 10:18, archived)

It's the person who wrote "the way we were", they don't write songs like that any more, because they dead

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 19 Jul 2025, 11:42, archived)

Alan sub-Prime

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 9:00, archived)

alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 17:54, archived)

nope
suspected rheumatoid arthritis in my ankles/feet
ffs
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:04, archived)

lol old

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:05, archived)

That's what gays get.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:14, archived)

Sounds suspicious
Probably a rumour
I bet Arthur is behind this

#wankles
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:24, archived)

Why? Have you had issues in the past? That's a huge diagnosis

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:28, archived)

Only the odd day with sore feet but nothing more than that
In the last month I've struggled to get down the stairs in the morning, it gets better later. I did a phone consultation with bupa the other day, shitloads of questions and this is what their algorithm is telling them. Seeing a real person in August. Hopefully they're wrong
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:35, archived)

LOL
isis
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:38, archived)

Yeah, could be anything.

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:39, archived)

Probably bad aids

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:44, archived)

Knowing this cunt he's been over treading on his Chianti grapes

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:48, archived)

I did initially suspect gout
I've earnt it
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:59, archived)

Chi ti +al
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 21:24, archived)

You sure you mean rheumatoid? A lot of people get osteo and rheumatoid mixed up. I do all the time!
Like hypo and hyperthyroidism. I had a well lol advice and guidance correspondence with an endocrinologist where I asked him about a patient with hypothyroidism and my secretary misheard and typed 'hyperthyroidism' and the consultant got arsey and wrote 'I think you mean hypothyroidism' only HIS secretary misheard and also typed 'hyperthyroidism'.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:39, archived)

Classic!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:44, archived)

LOL
ass
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:45, archived)

Bupa lady said rheumatoid repeatedly
Notes on the doc I initially got just said inflammatory.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:47, archived)

That sucks :(. Demand a second opinion and say if you'd wanted an inflammatory arthritis diagnosis you would have gone through the shitty NHS

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:58, archived)

I'm going to say 'inflame THIS', and point at my crotch

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 19:53, archived)

You can update GUNTSMELL to GUNTSWELL!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:41, archived)

Now this, I'm clicking.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 22:00, archived)

Coming up for 10 years since I was diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis, shortly after my 40th birthday.
Although to be fair I knew I had it for the previous 4 years, but the various GPs I saw about my sausage fingers kept saying "oh no, it's not psoriatic arthritis".

Still, failed two DMARDs and got put on a biologic, seems to be keeping it at bay. It really only affects my hands, reduced grip strength and motility (and my fingers are a bit bent lol) but I'm still able to do everything I could before, just drop stuff more often.

tl;dr: don't get too downhearted, better treatments come along all the time.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:54, archived)

LOL old

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sat 19 Jul 2025, 8:09, archived)

yeah
went to the funeral home this morning to view a corpse
this afternoon had art published in a kink magazine
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:27, archived)

Disgusting

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:29, archived)

given the chance, yeah

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:30, archived)

alright Jarvis Cocker

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:47, archived)

alright

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 19:00, archived)

that's a pretty quick turnaround for such a niche market

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 19:54, archived)

+s
Poss mongy interest?
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:09, archived)

Had a good day, I've been trying unsuccessfully to get hold of the electrician after the heat pump engineer who did our service told us he'd used the wrong wiring and then he booked in to see me this afternoon for a prostate exam.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:35, archived)

I'm currently a no armed electrician. You maybe able to get a grant to employ me. I wouldn't, my wrists are fucked , hth

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:41, archived)

Can you do me some certificates to say that the electrical extension I've done is Kosher so I can wire it directly in instead of via a mains plug??
I've got a 25m armoured cable going from a socket in the plant room to a breaker board in the shed which then goes via another 10m armoured cable to another breaker board in another shed and then that's connected via another mains plug to a micro inverter connected to two cheap 400w solar panels.

I'm getting solar panels done properly but I got bored waiting for the DNO
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 18:50, archived)

Right, I've googled it and apparently you need to do me something called a G98. You can gaz me it when it's ready

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 19:17, archived)

What sizes are the cables?

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:17, archived)

2.5mm

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 21:03, archived)

No he said the cables, not your erect pænus

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 21:37, archived)

ae æ
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 18 Jul 2025, 22:45, archived)

Thanks, I couldn't be arsed googling it on my phone

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 22:48, archived)

I'm struggling to work out what will burn first. I'd say the first board. Exciting times. A 2.5mm cable will take 18amps max in copper. You've set up a fantastic experiment

( mongychops, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 23:18, archived)

Have you tried CIIJASIIE?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:10, archived)

I have it on good authority that pee is stored in the balls

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 20:00, archived)

urine trouble now

( MiseryCunt, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 21:17, archived)

afternoon

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:00, archived)

sup

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:03, archived)

yo

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:11, archived)

bit more like it, nice one

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:10, archived)

sweet as

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:11, archived)

+s

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:12, archived)

ee ea +y
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:14, archived)

Chearsy

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:19, archived)

Chearsy

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:37, archived)

Chearsy Hawkes

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:51, archived)

morning

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:33, archived)

#TrumpTime

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:45, archived)

he's so important he has his own time zone

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 13:57, archived)

Hiyas xx

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:38, archived)

new phone who dis

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:45, archived)

G’day cobbler.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:39, archived)

crikey!

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 12:45, archived)

So it is

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 13:04, archived)

it still is

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:10, archived)

Been playing Atomfall on my day off
It's OK. Turns out it's made by the people who own 2000 AD
Hope everyone's day is going well
(8to12WeeksinScottishRegion Listening to Fur Q - Uzi Lover, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 13:32, archived)

hi

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:10, archived)

hi

(8to12WeeksinScottishRegion Listening to Fur Q - Uzi Lover, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:38, archived)

Hi

( $$ ✅, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 14:19, archived)

hello

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:11, archived)

This isn’t a very good thread btw, maybe Q’ueef will start a new one to get this joint jumpin’, so to speak

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:12, archived)

I don't like Queef's threads
he call us all knobber's or saink
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:19, archived)

it’s only what we deserve

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:20, archived)

speak for yourself darling

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:22, archived)

I've never knobbed anyone

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:25, archived)

You've been called a knobber though, regardless of accuracy.
We all have.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 16:39, archived)

Pegged then

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 18 Jul 2025, 17:19, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 18 Jul 2025, 7:02, archived)

morning

( MiseryCunt, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 7:07, archived)

Morning!

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 7:33, archived)

‘morning

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 7:34, archived)

morn fist
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 7:36, archived)

Bit early for that
Haven't had my regular post-breakfast poop yet.
( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 8:34, archived)

Happy Birthday and may every day be another wonderful secret.

( $$ ✅, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:16, archived)

It is even said that he liked beautiful women as much as I do, and many of them are on the younger side. No doubt about it – Jeffrey enjoys his social life.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:45, archived)

Phil licks his bum garden

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 20:25, archived)

Have they given you some new, much better, painkillers by any chance?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 17 Jul 2025, 20:56, archived)

Informer by Snow also features one of my all time favourites MC Shan
Not his finest hour unlike this
youtu.be/6D7dEepH89s?si=qVCfpndxEAXUl8yL

And this
youtu.be/dS4RpBR0Zn0?si=CzKDcehwq98FPaRn
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:07, archived)

In case anyone was wondering

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:07, archived)

/talk cryptic crossword
Is the answer primrose?
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:22, archived)

I’ll return with some fresh racism (3)

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:29, archived)

is it [redacted]

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 0:40, archived)

*klaxon of correctness*

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 0:42, archived)

Floating Sweeney has a jammy pocket (3, 4)

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:30, archived)

This one was Bob Todd

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:53, archived)

Shaving a simian is lolwaki (10)

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:32, archived)

This one was baldmonkey

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:53, archived)

A hotel in Bristol, one exotic place (6)
from the latest Private Eye cryptic.
( .Yeti., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:53, archived)

TAHITI
Cyclops very typically using 'Bristol' for 'tit', there.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 18 Jul 2025, 11:04, archived)

That's tomorrows Eastenders script sorted

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:33, archived)

That bloke who jumped out of a rocket to free-fall to earth from space, impressive, but when he landed his name was still fucking bum gardner

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:44, archived)

he's still fucking right now

( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:41, archived)

no, he's fucked

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 0:10, archived)

Yes. I was joining the puns

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:49, archived)

He ded

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 22:49, archived)

oh fuck it's a rip thread, i had no idea

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 23:14, archived)

Not sure I could've made it more obvious

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 23:24, archived)

i thought you was just fucking about

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 0:06, archived)

"In Austria he was also known for courting controversy with views that included expressing support for dictatorship as a system of government."
I mean I don't like to stereotype people, but he certainly sounds Austrian.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 8:52, archived)

Felix HEILHITLER

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:26, archived)

Felix Baumheadshot

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 23:15, archived)

FelEX

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 6:11, archived)

Flexible chap

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 9:28, archived)

Had my yearly eye exam today, two years late apparently, I'm very dilated right now, are you very dilated right now?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:40, archived)

+ brown

( .Yeti., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:41, archived)

Redacted etc
BRZZZZZZZ
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:39, archived)

My wife gets her eye examined yearly too, on account of underlying condition.
Since I work at the hospital, I've had her sit in at my work until her eye undilates enough to drive home. At least it proves to her that I have a job.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:45, archived)

I mean, they did look at both of mine, eyes exam didn't sound right though, but you've made it sound dirty, you really have
worse than .Yeti.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:48, archived)

he'

( .Yeti., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:16, archived)

^ worse than .Yeti

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:42, archived)

. Yeti is not the new , Trouser

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:52, archived)

dave sub-trouser

( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:03, archived)

rob keeps sending them the word count for 'trouser', and Hebtroco keep advertising

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:55, archived)

i bought some wool socks from them
def recommend. will buy more. probably get a belt at some point.
( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:08, archived)

i feel like you've posted this exact comment before, belt up lol
lol rebel
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:47, archived)

i probably hebtroco

( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 21:55, archived)

lol rob

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 18 Jul 2025, 0:46, archived)

Dilapidated, more like.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:50, archived)

japs+

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:58, archived)

No, but i am very distended

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:23, archived)

Apparently not, only 5cm. Told to go home

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:36, archived)

those are rookie numbers
i'm at 7
( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:51, archived)

Your posts are close together, I'd quickly kill yourself

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:08, archived)

i'm on it m8

( MiseryCunt, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:20, archived)

1 down

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 19:37, archived)

so that's 4cm?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 20:01, archived)

Hi titstain's, Queef Smegwin here
Bought anything cool l8ly?

Alt: gunt
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:50, archived)

When we were kids my brother once guffed in a jam jar and quickly put the lid on it.
We didn't open it for a good month but when we did it honked like it was freshly laid.

Couldn't believe it
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:54, archived)

we made our own entertainment in those days

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:56, archived)

character building stuff


st g
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:57, archived)

Hope that story was part of his eulogy.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:04, archived)

We passed the jar around during the service
Everyone got a good old whiff
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:08, archived)

Had any of it condensed into liquid?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:14, archived)

Not that we could see
I think a film of fart-grease must have lined the jar
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:23, archived)

It's imperative further research is carried out.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:46, archived)

agreed

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:41, archived)

Best thread ever

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:58, archived)

I preferred the gestational sac

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:37, archived)

I gave chatgpt a list of about a dozen records and asked it for the best sequence of them in a mix.
It did an alright job of it.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:18, archived)

Try putting the list into a random number generator and see if that does any better/same/worse.
I bet the difference is negligible.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:29, archived)

It justified the sequencing with energy levels, BPM etc

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:34, archived)

I once did a randomburn CD for this place, when they were a thing.
Track 1 was The Onion Song by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, and track 2 was Vendetta by Slipknot. The segue worked surprisingly well.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:30, archived)

Bit gaye m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:41, archived)

No it's knot

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:10, archived)

yeah, well, that's just, like, your onion, man

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:37, archived)

alright david guetta

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:04, archived)

A jam jar full of guffs

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:28, archived)

My pint is cool.

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:38, archived)

Holding off until 6 here
is the plan, at any rate
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:19, archived)

Just had a canned g&t

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:35, archived)

doesn't count

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:08, archived)

that's what I thought

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:18, archived)

Buy one get one half price in the coop. I walked home with one

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:32, archived)

Jamiroqzzz

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:37, archived)

A GUFFJAR BABY!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:04, archived)

A PC case
so no, nothing cool.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:23, archived)

Once you get the fans up and running I reckon it should stay fairly cool.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:31, archived)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⢀⣤⣄⢀⣴⡄⠀⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⢰⠶⣤⡀⡏⠉⢷⣼⠁⠹⣿⠃⢻⡾⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣄⣾⠋⠻⣾⠀⠈⠻⠃⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠈⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⣾⢷⣾⡇⠙⠿⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠸⡟⠳⣿⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠈⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠘⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠶⠶⠶⠦⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⣠⡶⠟⠛⠛⠛⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣹⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠟⠀⠀⠀⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠀⣶⡄⠀⠀⢷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⢈⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⢋⣉⡙⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⣤⡤⠶⠛⠉⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⣸⠗⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⣉⡛⢶⡶⠾⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⣦⣤⣴⠶⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡞⠻⣯⣹⡄⡇⠀⠈⢷⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⠛⠉⠳⣄⣨⡟⠀⢀⣤⣴⠾⠛⠛⠛⢷⣦⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣿⡁⠈⠻⣦⣤⠟⢋⣤⡾⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣯⣝⣷⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣇⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⡶⠶⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⣿⡟⠛⠉⢀⣴⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠷⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠒⢻⣿⡷⠶⠶⠶⢶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣬⣿⣦⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⡾⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⡶⠟⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⡆⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠞⠉⠀⠘⢿⣿⠀⣠⣴⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣤⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣷⠀⠀⣰⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡄
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢷⣼⡟⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡆DAVE TROUSER
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⠻⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣦⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠟⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⠁⠀⣀⣤⡾⠋⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡟⠀⠠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡶⠟⠁⠀⠈⢩⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡿⠁⠀⣠⠟⠁⠁⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠁⢀⣾⣃⣀⣀⣰⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⢄⠀⢀⠀⠀⣴⡿⠷⣤⣼⣏⣉⠉⠉⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⡿⠉⢻⡇⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⢾⣶⣬⣧⣄⣹⣷⣤⣀⠈⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠁⢀⣤⣿⡁⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣦⣄⡀⠉⠀⠈⠉⠛⠓⠶⠦⠤⠤⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢀⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡾⠿⣧⡀⠉⠓⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⠖⠛⢻⣧⠀⠀⠀
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( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:34, archived)

RUDE!

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:40, archived)

Quick! Grab a jam jar!

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:43, archived)

, cowabumga

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:48, archived)

Eat my sharts

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:36, archived)

I'm thinking of buying pepper spray

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:11, archived)

Best off buying deep heat spray
Plausible deniability innit
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:36, archived)

One shot in a jif lemon bottle, old school

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:16, archived)

I've decided to make my own
Using chilli oil, garlic oil, Chinese vinegar, soy sauce and a bit of sesame oil. I can always claim it's for seasoning food.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:45, archived)

organic, freshly ground

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 18:39, archived)

Buying things is for capitalist pigdogs.

( .Yeti., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:39, archived)

I don’t even own a things

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 16:48, archived)

Morning

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:42, archived)

b3ta

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:42, archived)

World Emoji Day, get involved

⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
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⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

( $$ ✅, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:46, archived)

, Prowser

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:51, archived)

lol

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:57, archived)

The only thing Gorge Lucas wanted protection in spaceballs was han solos image. So Mel agreed , dressed him as Indiana jones

( mongychops, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:54, archived)

spaceballs was fucking shit

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:48, archived)

^ first in the queue for the upcoming sequel

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:22, archived)

Han Solo shit first

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:48, archived)

I recognised his foul stench when I was brought on board

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:57, archived)

r
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:12, archived)

L7'zzz

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:22, archived)

Fuck you, mr horrible, fuck you

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:46, archived)

Mimsy!

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 23:10, archived)

m.imdb.com/title/tt0768212/
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 23:23, archived)

Shut up mimsy!
youtu.be/QP0SFZfaXDU?si=JXezioCa616sBwTb
( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 23:26, archived)

It's a big week here I've changed browser,
it has been a right pain in the arse.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 10:35, archived)

I tgried that
Too much hassle, poorer performance, mgave up, went back to Firefox
( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:00, archived)

I've gone from Chrome to FF
I have a feeling an extension is causing it but the performance is fucking awful.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:09, archived)

I do ok with waterfox, worth a try

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:47, archived)

I used to use FF but gave up because it's far too easily parasitized by extensions you don't want.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:50, archived)

like the mimsy extension

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:54, archived)

Then you have a bad extension or something else is fucked.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:45, archived)

So it's either exactly what I said or something else?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 14:48, archived)

Just making sure we're on the same page.
Look up "speedyfox" - despite the name it's for all modern browsers. Cleans up and optimizes various things including the various databases that get slow over time. Details on the site: crystalidea.com/speedyfox

May help, though try removing all extensions too and see if the problem goes away.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 15:43, archived)

i tried what you said, sadly i'm still insufferable

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 17:10, archived)

So Brave of you.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:02, archived)

, browser

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:28, archived)

persistent knobheadery

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 10:36, archived)

no u

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 10:45, archived)

The stuff of whimsy

( .Yeti., Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:02, archived)

my bollocks are aching
again :(
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:10, archived)

it's growing pains

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 12:55, archived)

gestational sac-Prime

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:37, archived)

That's what happens when Rodimus Prime meets Mimsy Prime

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 11:41, archived)

Hi prick's

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:00, archived)

Bored at work, buying records

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:01, archived)

Return of Django by The Upsetters, 1969, near mint, £8
Bargain
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:03, archived)

^ upset

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:45, archived)

Soul Fire y/n

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 1:12, archived)

Y but I like the late 60s output best

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 10:30, archived)

I'm sat in the pub. Not much I can do till my arms heal. Then it'll just be clearing everything till I go island hopping

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:03, archived)

I looked into getting shot of everything and fucking off to Asia at one point
Bottled it, ultimately
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:06, archived)

I'm on my own. Easy for me.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:09, archived)

My wife would be up for a move so nothing keeping us here really
Apart from all my collections.

Kid was 17 yesterday. Blanking the whole family now
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:26, archived)

I've fallen out of my nostalgia. Nobody wants it apart from strangers. So I'm selling. Sorry to hear about your daughter. You tried mate, all you could do. My daughter won't every live near me in the UK with her degree anyway. We are only young mate.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:12, archived)

Thanks man
Next year she's due forty-odd grand from my brother that's in my care. I expect I'll hear from her mum then :(
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:39, archived)

Just give it over. No point in anything else. Your brother certainly doesn't give a fuck, I'd channel him.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:48, archived)

Sage words dude.
Are you relocating to Grenada permanently?
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:40, archived)

You get 6 month visas. I might be back here. Might move on. Who knows. Might be might last big adventure, only get one life.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:46, archived)

Better to regret something you did than something you didn’t do.
That’s one of the only two pieces of advice I try to give, and the other is a lot less relevant here.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:51, archived)

I have always stuck to your other piece of advice, though, and have never got involved in a land war in Asia.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 13:59, archived)

Do they have ladyboys there?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 22:23, archived)

all sorts of insects

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 1:14, archived)

i +d
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 17:59, archived)

are you selling your place?
One of my old school friends had a heart attack 2 years ago, now he spends all his time traveling and exploring, what's nudged you into traveling
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:28, archived)

Nah he hasn't caught one for ages, can't fish with knackered wrists

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:29, archived)

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:30, archived)

I just fucking b& you from qftw and now this

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:32, archived)

Same really. My kids are grown. I've no ties at all anymore. Even the nostalgia has gone. I've had enough for now.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:08, archived)

Wankers cramp?

(Chocco The Real Spanishfy, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 18:02, archived)

Alright Jonty Bravery

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 18:35, archived)

I really don't like the incorrect use of apostrophes

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:03, archived)

Whys' that?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:13, archived)

It makes my mind hiccup when I read them

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 20:56, archived)

Do'nt be like that m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:34, archived)

*apostrophe's

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:41, archived)

Its terrible

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:49, archived)

Wank'er

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:51, archived)

where do, you stand on the, incorre,ct use of commas,?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 20:02, archived)

I fucking detest people who eschew full stops.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 20:15, archived)

"who is chew" ftfy

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 22:12, archived)

YFSFC

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 22:23, archived)

YF’SFC

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 23:24, archived)

i like breast's

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:07, archived)

"'""""""""o'h t'h'a't's' 'a' 's'h'a'm'e'''"'

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:08, archived)

alright M’ark Hollis

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:16, archived)

/talk /talk

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 21:27, archived)

Can't believe you pushed Hitler off the popular page

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 17 Jul 2025, 0:35, archived)

Aardfternoon.
I don’t know all of you as well as I could. Some of you have been here for decades and I don’t know a thing about you. I’m sure that’s a good thing in some cases, but for those of you who aren’t total fucking pricks: what’s the first thing I should know about you?

Alt: no there is no alt, answer the question, damn you.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:49, archived)

My mother's maiden name is Halifa.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:51, archived)

Interesting.
Is Halifax/Halifa X derived from that, like Malcolm X?
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:53, archived)

Yes, exactly.
Coincidentally, my first pet's name was Malcolm and my first car was a Tesla Model X - I got it on my 21st birthday on 13/7/22.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:34, archived)

Your security questions have been saved

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:28, archived)

I forgot to mention
that the car was a gift from Geoffrey, my best friend since we were in St Saviour's Primary School, and that it's green (which is my favourite colour).
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:39, archived)

This is obviously all lies.
No-one likes green.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:46, archived)

alright Kermit's nephew, enough with the self-pity

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:47, archived)

bah
Bird of the day: Carolina Wren (Thryothorus ludovicianus)
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:01, archived)

I saw a superb fairy-wren in Australia once.
It was fabulous!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:30, archived)

No, it was Superb
AI Overview
There are many delicious herbs that can be used in soups to enhance the flavor and aroma.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:39, archived)

HI I'M KERMIT

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:01, archived)

When you look at it constructively the Muppets were shit. I can explain my reasoning but I'm sure you already all agree. Thanks

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:46, archived)

American Vaudeville bollocks, never got the appeal

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:53, archived)

I mean more in their professional capabilities, but certainly chosen a very hard form of entertainment led to incompetence.

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:01, archived)

mnah mnah

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:27, archived)

I once got punched by former miss world Ashwarya Rai

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:52, archived)

Did you deserve it?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:54, archived)

sort of yeah
I accidentally got in her eyeline during a take
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:01, archived)

You irredeemable bastard.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:06, archived)

+spunk line
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:17, archived)

accidentally
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:36, archived)

How can she punch?!

( .Yeti., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:07, archived)

'AWFUL!!'

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:15, archived)

I bet you had a good wank about that afterwards.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:24, archived)

So did I.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:24, archived)

I hope you did away with outmoded gender stereotypes and smacked her in the chops

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:36, archived)

My knickers are red and they have polka dots on.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:54, archived)

Thanks for that reminder and making me want to vomit directly into your eyeballs.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:55, archived)

Brace yourself

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:57, archived)

^ noob can't meme

( mongychops, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:56, archived)

'podka'

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:02, archived)

Damned auto correct

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:18, archived)

I talk a lot of shit

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:02, archived)

Well now I don’t know if that statement is true or just shit.
It’s like one of those paradoxes or sutin.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:07, archived)

The first guard only talks shit, the second only calls you a wanker.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:20, archived)

Bob Hoskins gave me the best advice I've ever had
"Garold*, never put your own money in a movie." We were talking about the film Secret Agent that he starred in, alongside Christian Bale, Robin Williams, Patrica Arquette, Gérard Depardieu and Jim Broadband. You'd think with a cast like that it'd be a great movie, a huge success. Bob thought so too so invested in it himself. With his own money. Which he regretted deeply.

*he didn't call me Garold, he used my actual, real name.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:09, archived)

Was this long enough ago that he was still known as Jim Dialup rather than Jim Broadband?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:15, archived)

Dialup Danesh

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:33, archived)

Mike Dialup

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:49, archived)

Baud Adams

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:22, archived)

Modemis Roussos

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:40, archived)

BBS King

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:59, archived)

Telegraph Savalas

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:03, archived)

Fibre Woods

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:05, archived)

Misty in Routers

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 15:54, archived)

Bruce Wireless

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:44, archived)

Minnie Driver

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:45, archived)

vg
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:45, archived)

The Bluetooth Man Group

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:45, archived)

The Modem Lovers

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:46, archived)

i win, fuck you all

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 16:48, archived)

Jim Broadband

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:16, archived)

James sub-Broadband

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:18, archived)

Jim Baudbent

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:47, archived)

That I am an actual fucking prick.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:16, archived)

There’s always one.
Or more.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:17, archived)

Some of you have been here for decades and I don’t know a thing about you. I’m sure that’s a good thing in some cases, but for those of you who aren’t total fucking pricks: what’s the first thing I should know about you?

Alt: no there is no alt, answer the question, damn you.

And I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:25, archived)

*notes that Aardvark was born on 16/07/1924*

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:36, archived)

Wouldn't it be 1914 if it was my eleventy-first birthday?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:51, archived)

This is why my complex identity-theft scheme fell flat on its face.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:00, archived)

^Dildo Baggins

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:37, archived)

Why have i been excluded from this?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:34, archived)

Don't tell anyone this: you're actually my favourite b3tan.
Don't tell anyone, because it's not true in any way.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:38, archived)

We all know the truth.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:13, archived)

No, I'm telling them.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:15, archived)

first of all, I'm a delight

( MiseryCunt, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:35, archived)

+angel

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:37, archived)

Yes but what else?
I already knew that.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:39, archived)

i once slipped and skewered my cock on a railing spike after slipping whilst leaning over these railings trying to knock on my own promenade apartment window
my whole bodyweight was on the spike which was in my cock as i effectively planked trying not to fall into the cut out for the basement windows. my knob went black.
( MiseryCunt, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 17:55, archived)

Well that’s certainly a story.
I hope your knob’s the right colour now.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 19:30, archived)

Well, I'm fresh 'cause I'm the best
And I get wild when I'm riled
I never get passed by 'cause I'm fly
And I'ma put you on hold 'cause I'm bold
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:45, archived)

Ok but that's four things and now I have to write them all down.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:02, archived)

all you need to remember is "overshares"

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:10, archived)

it's best to know absolutely nothing about me, perhaps even less than that x
( vladimir, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:04, archived)

I find this unacceptable, so tell me all of your darkest secrets.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:08, archived)

absolutely not
*twitches*
( vladimir, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:28, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 6:31, archived)

m⭕️rning

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 6:48, archived)

Please stop posting on b3ta.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:46, archived)

NO U

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:52, archived)

We have a right laugh here don't we

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:02, archived)

ROFLMAO

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:29, archived)

that means no does it

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:28, archived)

🅼🅾🆁🅽🅸🅽🅶

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 7:21, archived)

alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:46, archived)

                                                        
                                 __                     
  ___ ___     ___   _ __    ___ /\_\    ___      __     
/' __` __`\  / __`\/\`'__\/' _ `\/\ \ /' _ `\  /'_ `\   
/\ \/\ \/\ \/\ \L\ \ \ \/ /\ \/\ \ \ \/\ \/\ \/\ \L\ \  
\ \_\ \_\ \_\ \____/\ \_\ \ \_\ \_\ \_\ \_\ \_\ \____ \ 
 \/_/\/_/\/_/\/___/  \/_/  \/_/\/_/\/_/\/_/\/_/\/___L\ \
                                                 /\____/
                                                 \_/__/ 

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:34, archived)

Sticksy

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:46, archived)

m’ning

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:43, archived)

Varders.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:46, archived)

I will mostly be shouting what the fuckity fuck?! at things today

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:49, archived)

alright Gregg and/or John

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:59, archived)

I probably won't be exposing my gentials or using any racial slurs
or tasting some spotty weirdo's fricase of samphire and guava on a bed of minced wankberry with a monkfish spunk foam.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:19, archived)

Terrible bullying of Queef. :(

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:48, archived)

no, he said he *wouldn't* be exposing his genitals or using racial slurs.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:56, archived)

He'

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:23, archived)

All they need to do is rebrand MasterChef to MasterRace and Torode can keep his job.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:02, archived)

erRace urBate Torode Wallace
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:09, archived)

-at things today +don’t talk buck

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:28, archived)

fuck off, Twiki.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:45, archived)

bidibidibidi

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:52, archived)

[redacted] klaxon

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:01, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8452941
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:30, archived)

+ toilet

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 14:29, archived)

morning

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⣾⣿⠏⢀⠂⠠⢈⠐⠠⠐⠀⠹⣦⠀⢡⠈⡐⢀⠂⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⢀⠂⠄⣃⠑⣢⡼⢏⡸⢓⢞⠷⡋⢇⣾⢋⠶⣩⢖⡱⢣⠞⣌⠧⢻⣷
⣻⣿⠀⠀⠂⠁⠄⡈⠀⠄⠡⢀⠘⢷⡀⠢⠐⡠⢈⠐⡀⢉⠳⢤⣀⠌⣐⣤⠗⡫⢔⢣⡘⡬⣌⠓⣸⡿⢥⣋⢟⡡⢎⡵⢋⠞⣈⠦⣉⣿
⢻⣿⡀⠠⠁⠌⢀⠐⠈⢀⠂⠄⢂⠈⠹⢦⣁⠐⠠⠌⡐⣀⠆⡔⢪⡙⣍⢢⠣⡑⢎⡴⣈⠓⣤⡟⠯⣕⢣⢞⡬⢓⢩⡐⢣⡘⠤⢒⣰⣿
⠈⢻⣷⡀⠐⢈⠠⠀⡁⠠⠐⢀⠂⠈⠄⡀⠉⠛⠷⣬⣱⣨⠜⣨⠑⡔⣂⠣⡱⣉⣬⡲⠼⡛⢕⡊⡓⢌⡧⠚⣄⠣⢒⠌⡒⠬⡘⢢⣾⠟
⠃⠀⠛⣿⣦⣀⠠⠁⠄⡐⠈⢀⠠⠁⡐⠠⠁⠂⠄⡀⠌⠉⡉⠍⠛⡉⢍⡙⢡⡉⡔⢰⢑⡘⢢⢡⡑⠪⢜⠓⡤⢉⠲⢌⡑⣢⣽⡿⠋⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⣷⣤⣀⠀⡁⠂⠠⠐⠀⠄⡈⠐⠀⠄⡈⠐⠠⠌⡑⢈⠆⡘⢆⠆⡅⢣⢌⡘⣡⠒⣌⠳⢎⠒⡰⢉⣒⣬⣾⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣶⣦⣅⣈⡐⠀⠠⠁⠌⠀⠄⡁⠂⠔⡈⠔⡨⣖⡡⢪⠖⡡⢆⡘⢡⠊⣄⣣⣬⣶⣷⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⣷⣶⣶⣥⣦⣤⣥⣢⣤⣡⣆⣥⣴⣥⣮⣴⣶⣾⣷⠿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

( $$ ✅, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:00, archived)

$entimental $couser

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 9:47, archived)

m👌rn🖕ng

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:01, archived)

Not according to the readings I'm seeing.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 10:30, archived)

tell them about the twinkie

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 11:26, archived)

Well he's slim and hairless, in his early twenties, and he's got a huge
oh wait, twinkie. Never mind.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 11:28, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8452933
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 11:38, archived)

yes

( Richard Shitheels, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 11:47, archived)

no

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:00, archived)

Alright shitheels

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:03, archived)

what

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:41, archived)

morning

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 12:41, archived)

i'll tear the fucking eyes out of your face for this

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 13:39, archived)

right. i'm going to bed.
then having a shower, then going to bed again.

i'd like an alarm call please, and some posts.
( MiseryCunt, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 22:07, archived)

piss off you big nosed rubber faced bastard

( MiseryCunt, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 23:01, archived)

Bollocks

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 0:17, archived)

morning

( MiseryCunt, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 6:11, archived)

Why?
Well? Explain yourselves!
( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 20:03, archived)

Dave Trouser made me do it, sir.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 20:12, archived)

, Trouser

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 22:01, archived)

^^ may contain lies

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 1:41, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8452910
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 1:59, archived)

peer pressure

( MiseryCunt, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 20:21, archived)

Hereditary peer pressure

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 20:39, archived)

no

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 21:01, archived)

fuck you then

( MiseryCunt, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 21:47, archived)

Why? is for later. How? is for right now. ✋🏼

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 21:55, archived)

The Smithzzz

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 22:01, archived)

The Queen Is Dead Boys
posting this in advance for when Morrisey carks it
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 2:01, archived)

"The more you exhume me, the closer I get"

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:15, archived)

alright Fred Dineage

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Wed 16 Jul 2025, 8:19, archived)

peers morgan

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Jul 2025, 22:52, archived)