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# newsletter subject line compo
hey folks
write some jokes
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 10:58, archived)
# whats black and white and red all over
panda massacre
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 10:59, archived)
# Or....
A panda eating a baby.
(I helped save b3ta! The Togaboy The world will end on, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:25, archived)
# Bloody foreign ash coming over here polluting our air, disrupting our jobs
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:00, archived)
# Clogging your interweb tubes like volcanic ash in a jet engine
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:01, archived)
# <insert iceland volcano flight cancelation pun here>
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:01, archived)
# B3ta - the class joker at Clown School.
(I helped save b3ta! Curis, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:01, archived)
# Hahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:05, archived)
# Ash for cash

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:02, archived)
# horse walks into a bar, the barman says "why the long face"
jeremy horse says "i need, a poo, i need a poo, i need a poo, i need poo..."
(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:02, archived)
# IN UR JETSTREAM GROUNDIN UR FLITES LOL
...or something.
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:03, archived)
# Leaders' mass debate turn-off for voters
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:04, archived)
# Leaders' mass debate live on television
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:05, archived)
# We met a black man once
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:05, archived)
# Oprah Winfrey in "is black" shocker
www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/lostinshowbiz/2010/apr/15/oprah-winfrey-kitty-kelley
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:07, archived)
# .... that column is my guilty pleasure going home on friday
"'[The show's makeup and hair people] were nothing short of miracle workers, because Oprah without her hair and makeup done is a pretty scary sight . . . They narrow her nose and thin her lips . . . and I can't even begin to describe the wonders they perform with her hair.'"

Renminds me of Constable savage from NTNOCN

www.youtube.com/watch?v=BO8EpfyCG2Y

"...possession of curly black and thick lips"
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:11, archived)
# haha
who was 40 years old and had spent 30 years in the Royal Navy
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:17, archived)
# and even HE is concerned about immigration
If an immigrant is concerned about immigration then it MUST be bad


and pfft...
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:24, archived)
# I watched some men Mass Debate on the telly!
(I helped save b3ta! printmeister http://tinyurl.com/c8s8fd5 for titanic T's, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:05, archived)
# mind the piss
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:06, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:07, archived)
# SIGUR ROS GIG TURNS UGLY
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:05, archived)
# Ash cancel European tour
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:06, archived)
# Katrina & The Waves cancel New Orleans gig
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:10, archived)
# <insert whatever you want to hear in order to get this as the headline>
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:06, archived)
# Eyjafjallajokull
Sponsored by Al Qaeda.
(I helped save b3ta! Collatallie Sisters, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:07, archived)
# I kicked a dog once and it sicked a rainbow
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:07, archived)
# Now with the dark blue power of seven overgrown sundials
(I helped save b3ta! Gawain the oven safe flan tin willy bum fart poo, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:08, archived)
# MUM'S NOT GONE TO ICELAND LOL
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:08, archived)
# If you take the first letter in every second article in each b3ta newsletter, a secret anagram will be revealed
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:09, archived)
# Hummm let's see...
y....o...u...r...a...l...l...g...

Blimey he's right you know!
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:12, archived)
# Iceland: Fouling the UK more than Kerry Katona's prawn ring
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:10, archived)
# ewwwwww.......
WIN
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:11, archived)
# a new low
\o/
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:28, archived)
# Red Hot Icelandic Action
(Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:10, archived)
# Chiropractors are bogus spine wizards, sue us if you dare
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:11, archived)
# ^this, please!
(I helped save b3ta! Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:19, archived)
# YES
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:20, archived)
# England finally wins the ashes
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:11, archived)
# Ha ha
(I helped save b3ta! fuscous, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:31, archived)
# Eyjafjallajokull is our new favourite Scrabble word
(Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:11, archived)
# Iceland: All ash and no cash!
(I helped save b3ta! printmeister http://tinyurl.com/c8s8fd5 for titanic T's, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:14, archived)
# This one please.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:14, archived)
# Herman Van Rompuy, the president of Europe, writes shit haiku verse
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:14, archived)
# Seven Syllables, Eyjafjallajokull, fucking hell Iceland.
(Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:16, archived)
# Putting the LOL in Eyjafjallajokull
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:16, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:21, archived)
# Ha! yes
(I helped save b3ta! Ysol ab abl blap, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:23, archived)
# oh yes.
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:32, archived)
# NOISE POLLUTION
The silent killer.
(I helped save b3ta! Not Pineapple anymore, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:20, archived)
# 253 shopping days left until Christmas
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:20, archived)
# this week sponsored by your mum
(Claude Speed was a Roman called Claudius Speedicus, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:22, archived)
# Volcanoes fuck with dyslexics at mass rally in Eyja....Ejja....Ejyaf....Iceland.
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:30, archived)
# First our money, now our skies

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:35, archived)
# 2nd European ash cloud spotted
believed to be coming from Warsaw
(I helped save b3ta! Biffins Bridge, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:56, archived)
# Question Time; South Park for Geriatrics
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 11:58, archived)