Reunited with the Leader of the Pack...
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-68040491
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Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 8:59,
Reply)
Fighting back against gay-i
Up yours, techbros
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Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 8:43,
Reply)
No thanks, my deepfakes of Superman rimming Captain America are just too good.
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jonbob loves you, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 9:46,
Reply)
Clever idea
Steganography sounds like a process of fooling AI with an unexpected stegosaurus.
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 15:53,
Reply)
Idle slayer
This has consumed 3 months of my life, so I want to share that misery.
Have fun.
Let me know when you meet the entity, and enter the village, etc.
I'm about to do my 4th UA... mostly to get double dragon scales because I've still not got armory.
My finger hurts.
(, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 2:54, Reply)
Note:
Tom Scott died on the way back to his home planet.
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 20:58,
Reply)
Did he stop off at the moon and flip that Japanese lander right side up?
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jonbob loves you, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 9:16,
Reply)
Write what you know. Write what you know. "I know Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone"
well write a song about that then.
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garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 13:50,
Reply)
Yes my heart pains me so - I've gpt heartburn you know
I'm lonesome for you.
(, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 13:37, Reply)
I like the song they did
which revealed them to be on the side of the C64 in the computer wars.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-EUDBV6Kmo
Bet Cartoons had an Amstrad.
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monkeon schmonkeon, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 11:10,
Reply)
Analysing the first two minutes of an episode of The Simpsons
This is rather lovely
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Ambegris likes his tea stirred anti-clockwise, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 23:08,
Reply)
He's obvioulsy very good on this topic, and it's gold for anyone who wants to know how to go about writing comedy
But I found it exhausting after a few minutes.
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fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Fri 19 Jan 2024, 9:45,
Reply)
The Man Who Invented 800 Toys
Rather lovely and life-affirming short film, sorry about that.
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fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Thu 18 Jan 2024, 12:15,
Reply)
I think I remember this from last time around.
And he's still going!
(, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 12:19, Reply)
Yet another problem with reproducing.
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 18:07,
Reply)
not sure what the inorganic version would be like
can anyone else smell patchouli oil ?
(, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 16:26, Reply)
Possibly, can't see him balancing the job in the cannabis products shop with the regular work in an independent comics store
(, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 8:38, Reply)
How to grow an amplifier, organically?
Trippy choon tho'
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 18:19,
Reply)
i think he's lip syncing
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MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 17:32,
Reply)
Cool
I used to have one of those. It's not too difficult to sound like a cylon with a bit of practice.
"by your command"
(, Fri 19 Jan 2024, 9:28, Reply)
Oh FFS, really...
Why are you readig the telegraph
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Boot I want to know what you meant, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 19:07,
Reply)
dunno, but if you're looking for gammons, i know the place
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simbosan is too tired, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 6:50,
Reply)
Teh Grauniad, the morning star, the ‘independent’, prospect, New York Times, the mirror, and the canary are normally fairly safe.
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Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 17:31,
Reply)
It's here, the 48K ZX Spectrum game of the b3ta game of the 7 Bins of Sunak!
I made this!
From this post by Dave Bagpuss Forsey:
b3ta.com/links/1608866
I started turning this into a Speccy game and needed a main character sprite, added a chef and turned the suburban semi into a bistro before I realised I was basically remaking Cookie. But the title was so brilliant I had to give it the full cinematic treatment.
So, chef Parsley Sage has just opened his new Bistro in the enclave of Maily Dale and needs to sort his recycling. Help him knock everything into the right bin before Sunak can take those all-important bins away.
If you scroll down you can download a .TAP file to play in a ZX Spectrum emulator, or click on the 'JSSpeccy' or 'QAOP' links to play in a browser emulator. Keys are Q/A-Up/Down, O/P-Left/Right and SPACE or M to fire.
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joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 12:40,
Reply)
For further info -
Yes, those are bags of dog shit you're flinging, and from Round 2 onwards you can throw then directly at the Rwanda-re-branding titular twunt himself as he puts in a guest appearance.
The digitised speech is mostly cries of 'Arse!'. I did wonder about how far auditory illusions can be pushed by telling everyone the other word you sometimes hear is 'Genocide', but it's not, it's 'Badgerflaps'.
That's an Aztec sunstone on the title screen. It was the best thing I could find to digitise into a one-bit graphic and wanted something ancienty as I was really caught by the '7 Bins of Sunak' / '7th Voyage of Sinbad' type allusion in the title. And the 'Enslaved Children' theme from Temple of Doom seemed to fit nicely. Make of that what you will.
As for the name 'Parsely Sage', it was just right in front of me one day when I opened a cupboard and had to get it out of my head or it would have stuck around for years. Also possibly influenced by this brilliant skit from Futurama:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaAq4Yc5o4g
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joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 12:18,
Reply)
I heard the arse, but not the badgerflaps
That's a sentence that will never be said again in the history of mankind.
(, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 12:58, Reply)
Quick, sample yourself saying it,
Then mix it into some techno techno techno techno beats.
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joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 14:29,
Reply)
Time to dig out the Speccy from the loft
Might even sort the dodgy power socket on it that i've been meaning to fix for the last 40 years!
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Hummel Who died and made you....oh wait...., Thu 18 Jan 2024, 15:15,
Reply)
Aces
Playing it with a Spectaculator emulator.
Works fine with an X-box controller =)
(, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 17:07, Reply)
I am privileged to have seen the BB live twice...
Both times: so good...
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Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 1:01,
Reply)
Only seen them the once myself, Ad-Rock forgot the lyrics to Sabotage and covered it up magnificiently with some improvised swearing.
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quackpipe hovers, menacingly, Thu 18 Jan 2024, 11:32,
Reply)
Answers with Chuffley
I made this!
Thought I might make a thing and see where it goes.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aag9v2Zo6m8
(, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 17:12, Reply)
That was entertaining
Do the onions know they're sponsoring their own demise?
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tarka_dall Like normal dall, only a bit more spicy, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 20:14,
Reply)
I have a question.
Imagine a graviton shielded box, that is, a box that shields its contents from the force/effect/emergent-feature of gravity itself. When considering all the related relative effects that disassociating oneself from the geometry of spacetime may entail, what, if anything, might happen to onions (or other objects) placed inside? Once the box holds something that has mass but no longer interacts normally with spacetime, what properties might the box now possess? For the purposes of this question we can assume the box is indestructible. Thanks in advance.
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 22:25,
Reply)
I did the only thing possible when faced with such a question.
I asked Google's bot.....
The concept of a graviton shielded box, while fascinating, delves into realms of theoretical physics where our current understanding is still evolving. There are different ways to approach this thought experiment, each with its own set of intriguing possibilities:
Effects on objects inside the box:
Time Dilation: If the box truly disassociates itself from spacetime, time inside could pass at a different rate than outside. Onions placed inside might age slower or faster, depending on the relative time dilation.
Inertial Isolation: Objects within the box would be free from the influence of external gravitational forces. They wouldn't fall or experience weight, though any internal forces (like the onion's own structural cohesion) would still operate.
Quantum Uncertainty: Since gravity plays a role in collapsing wave functions, removing an object from the influence of gravity might lead to increased quantum uncertainty within the box. Onions inside might exist in a superposition of multiple states simultaneously.
Exotic Phenomena: Depending on the specific mechanism of the shielding, exotic effects like antigravity or even repulsive spacetime distortions could occur within the box, potentially altering the physical properties of the onions or even causing them to disintegrate or rearrange in unusual ways.
Properties of the box itself:
Mass and Inertia: If the box truly holds something with mass but no longer interacts with spacetime, it might violate fundamental principles of physics like the equivalence principle. This could lead to paradoxes or inconsistencies in how the box interacts with the surrounding universe.
Motion and Spacetime Curvature: The box itself might become completely invisible or undetectable, as it wouldn't interact with light or gravitational waves. Additionally, its movement wouldn't cause any spacetime curvature, effectively making it a "ghost" in the fabric of reality.
Energy Requirements and Stability: Maintaining such a shield against the fundamental force of gravity would likely require enormous amounts of energy. The source and sustainability of this energy would be a significant challenge. Additionally, the integrity of the shield against external forces or internal instabilities would be a major concern.
It's important to remember that the concept of a graviton shielded box pushes the boundaries of our current scientific understanding. While some of the proposed effects might be theoretically possible, they haven't been observed or experimentally verified. This thought experiment serves as a reminder of the vastness of the unknown and the ongoing quest to explore the mysteries of gravity and spacetime.
Ultimately, the true nature of what might happen to onions or the box itself within a graviton shielded enclosure remains a realm of fascinating speculation and a testament to the power of human imagination in exploring the frontiers of physics.
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TBL I posted this on, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 13:20,
Reply)
In the future we roll our eyes
at the notion of gravitons and aether. Turns out it's merely a function of spacetime compression and proximity. The equivalence principle (gravitational and inertial mass) was the big clue, iirc.
(, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 23:53, Reply)
The contents would appear to simply vanish, leaving a vacuum
Gravity and time are so deeply linked that you have imagined a box where time does not proceed inside it, but the box proceeds through time. The contents stay where they are (in time), yet the box moves forwards, so the box would appear to become empty.
Of course, as soon as the box moves forwards it no longer protects the contents, which would then start to experience time and gravity again, just not in the same moment as they used to. It will never catch up with the moment we are in, as that would require it to move faster than C.
I adhere to the theory that our universe was formed from a black hole in a previous universe, and as such 'forwards in time' is 'inwards, away from the event horizon', which would appear infinitely hot and dense, as we observe. Thus, time itself is caused by gravity and so if you eliminate gravity affecting an object, you stop time affecting the object and the universe would move on without it.
This is, of course, impossible.
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My Name was saying these words inside your head on, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 17:13,
Reply)
So you imagine the box as a kind of hole
that cancels the speed/velocity/momentum/inertia relative to the universe of objects dropped into it. I can get behind that.
The vanishing part doesn't seem to work for me though. Light experiences no time, yet there's tonnes of the stuff all over the place, it has energetic properties we can measure, it doesn't vanish by virtue of being massless and timeless.
My magic box is indestructible, so how are the objects escaping?
If there's no time in the box, wouldn't objects placed inside be frozen in time (like they're inside a scifi stasis field)?
I think the moment the onions are secured in the box, they stay forever fresh and either 'propel' the box (by virtue of rejecting/exiting the local/universal reference frame) at a decent percentage of C, or bestow antigravity and/or other properties of exotic matter to the box, or both.
Or they explode.
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 20 Jan 2024, 17:59,
Reply)
No
That's not what I imagine, I imagine time to be the same as proposed by Einstein. In that theory, we all constantly move forwards through time at the speed of light, but this motion is a vector shared by our speed through space, so the faster you move through space, the slower you move through time (to an external observer).
Your question is a category error because in essence it is 'imagine an impossible thing, what would happen in the real world if this impossible thing existed'. My answer is that there would be something akin to an event horizon inside the box, just like happens in the only place we know of in the real world where time stops, at the edge of a black hole. The contents would vanish and never interact with our universe again.
Your 'magic box' is only sealed in 3 dimensions, there are quite a few more than that. There is also more than one way to conceptualise time stopping. One is how you imagine it, where you continue to move forwards through time at the speed of light, but your internal clock stops. The other way is that your internal clock does not stop, but you do not move forwards through time while the rest of the universe does.
Imagine it this way, you have created a volume where anything placed in it remains at the point in time and space where+when it was placed inside. When we move on, and it is now 1 second later, where is the onion? It exists 1 second ago, and we cannot see it, to us, it simply vanishes.
Mind your fingers putting the onion in.
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My Name was saying these words inside your head on, Sun 21 Jan 2024, 10:47,
Reply)
Shed of the year is back for it's 18th year - about time you entered b3tans
In 2007 there was a smoking ban in England, the first human-powered circumnavigation of the globe ends, I had been lurking on b3ta for about 3 years, BUT I also created the Shed of the year competition.
The first winner was a Roman Temple (Still one of my fav sheds ever)
So this year celebrate the 18th year by adding your shed to the competition, there is a £1000 prize and a plaque for the winning sheddie.
Will a proper old school pub shed win this year, or will it be a workshop that the next big thing to crush the human race is created in?
Looking forward to seeing your sheds
Wilco
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unclewilco, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 14:30,
Reply)
People who turn their shed into a pub are just
Eight Ace in denial, aren't they?
(Which isn't to say I wouldn't like a garden pub)
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monkeon schmonkeon, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 15:21,
Reply)
We do have quite a few pubsheds from the Newcastle area, so I think you could be onto something
www.readersheds.co.uk/share.cfm?county=tyne+and+wear
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unclewilco, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 15:31,
Reply)
i can't build up enough stock to fill a shed shelf
Keep drinking it, see
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Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 20:31,
Reply)
I think quite a few b3tans have entered b3tans
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simbosan is too tired, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 10:01,
Reply)
Over the years, yes
Most have used their real life names, so I never know!
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unclewilco, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 12:00,
Reply)
At this stage…
I think it’s quite likely there are b3tans resulting from b3tans entering b3tans.
(, Wed 17 Jan 2024, 23:03, Reply)
They did it, the mad crazy bastards actually made jenkem!
"Kush should not be confused with the drug of the same name found in the US, which is a mixture of “an ever-changing host of chemicals” sprayed on plant matter and smoked. Kush in Sierra Leone is quite different; it is a mixture of cannabis, fentanyl, tramadol, formaldehyde and – according to some – ground down humans bones."
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garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 12:47,
Reply)
I’ve got me nan’s urn for of ashes
So rack ‘em up…
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garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 22:26,
Reply)
I hear things and put them with other things
I made this!
I have no talent.... But i know Kristin Velvet makes the Sugarbabes
a beastly beaut.
(, Tue 16 Jan 2024, 2:39, Reply)
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