Going out with a whimper not a bang.
I've been here for a few years now (in one incarnation or another) doing what I do. Mostly sifting thru the dusty catacombs of my mind to come up with an original, sometimes funny, sometimes poignant tale to tell based upon the weeks question. I guessing that I'm about 50/50 for the ratio of my stories that have made front-page (since that seems to be the goal). Tho my luck has been with me for the past few weeks!
Occasionally I've scraped the bottom of the barrel and posted an awful pun or two - but nothing completely unforgivable.
I also occasionally tip my hat at doing some truly awful gimp work for the odd Image Challenge.

Over the last year or two I found myself getting sick and tired of all the negative, shit-flinging, often personal attacks from the trolls (including some genuinely appalling things said about my wife and daughter - unsurprisingly mostly from AB and rory... figures). If you don't know who the "trolls" are by now then you're probably one of them. Sometimes I would try to take some of them on at their own game. A few times I even crossed the line myself - but in my defence if I did I made sure to apologise promptly and publicly for doing so. And there are some lines I refuse to cross, like posting RL info (not for the wealth of it if you know where to look) but personally I think that shows a level of bastardry and immaturity that goes beyond trolling.
EDIT:& criticizing posters family for the way they look, regardless of whether they are b3tans or not. I personally think that having a dig at "non-combatants" as it were is not the gentlemanly thing to do. But that's just my view. I have however reveled in giving some people shit for being skinny little gits or having inordinately large facial features! So there is that.

Then AB reposted what was probably one of the first stories I posted (having lurked for a few years before that!) - http://b3ta.com/questions/breakingup/post2085223 - to those who took the time to read it rather than just childishly seek an opportunity to stir shit, they managed to glean the tale and responded in an appropriate way.
It kinda brought me full circle tho.
Here's a man who is so ensconced in the "tee-hee-hee, lets tease that guy" school-yard bully mentality that he actively trawls thru this site collating links from stories and posts to build up a compendium of links in order to repost them regularly just to shit-stir and tease. That to me isn't cool, or even funny. It's fucking creepy.
It's a pity tho 'cause last week he managed to do a good, gross post which did answer the question - albeit the first in quite a few months now.

And then there's BraynDedd.
This charming fellow seems to think it's ok to post my RL details here as tho it's a funny joke.
Now I'm not that hard to find - a simple google search of my original username (the one that got stolen by Brigadier) will pretty much tell you all there is to know about me (including my OkCupid page!). I myself have done the same with a few people here. It's not that hard.
But... and herein lies the difference I think that posting those sort of details (even RL names) is both dangerous and exceedingly immature (I'm pretty sure that's what /b on 4chan devolved into). Yet BD seems to thinks it's funny and a good stir. And he seems to get away with it with impunity on this seemingly unmoderated board. As far as I know it is basically an unwritten rule (couldn't find it in the FAQ but I know posters have been caught for it in the past - Fxd - Thanks bill.) that you don't post either your own or other peoples RL info here. Am I wrong?
Depending upon where you stand on this issue think on this - if I pissed him off enough for him to think it's ok to do to me how long do you think it is before you piss him off enough that he'll post some of your stuff here?

Now I'm not going to flounce like Alby Marshmallow - vowing never to return, only to reappear a few weeks later. I'd be lying if I did.
I bid you au revoir, but for now this ain't adieu.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:01, 157 replies)

I'm guessing they're only here
because Xboxlive is down and they can't play Call of Duty.
(Dildo Bugger destroyed a ring on, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:24, closed)

Nonsense, I don't even own a playstation.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 12:44, closed)

See you in two weeks?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:45, closed)

When I've got a good story....

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:58, closed)

If only sad sacks, if only.
(Bum Bag Fashion Boy Burned a home made pizza on, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 23:13, closed)

As for the posting of RL info, the appropriate FAQ section is here:
What is out of bounds on B3ta?
(bill, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:46, closed)

Cheers.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 1:59, closed)

(Baldmonkey's Mum, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:15, closed)

terrible bullying of the chinless wreck

(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:18, closed)

Well done you!
It's my best side, I must say.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:02, closed)

Steady on, he'll start internet stalking you on a massive scale now that you've posted a couple of trivial bits of information that are instantly provided on the first page of a google search.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:07, closed)

Your powers of extrapolation are
astounding.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:14, closed)

It takes considerably more effort to find out my real name from just my b3ta name than it does yours, and you yourself admitted to having looked at various registers for me, because I am such a massive threat to you and your family.
Seriously, get a grip and fuck off you paranoid mental prick.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 16:27, closed)

doesn't he reckon he's in his thirties?
how come the pube-faced blubbernaut was already a fucked fifty year old in 2008?
(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 15:30, closed)

41 this year shambo.
So yes, I was in my 30's when that pic was taken.

For someone who claims to have a PhD in Mathematics I wouldn't have thought that level of working out was beyond you.
Oh well.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 5:21, closed)

hahaha ... so as well as being an ugly, dim underachieving cuckold
you also look 15 years older than your age? hahahahshaha. no wonder you're so fucking upset all the time
(alright alright, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 7:48, closed)

shambo & rory in 1 reply?
I'm a lucky fellow.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 8:02, closed)

Jesus, no wonder your mum went mental and topped herself.
If you looked that fucking haggard at 36, imagine how old you must have made her feel.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:29, closed)

lol

(alright alright, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 11:26, closed)

Worst punchline ever.

(Woodlouse say it with flowers. Send her a Triffid, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 1:51, closed)

you can file this under 'nobody gives the faintest shit'.
why do you think you got stepped/ banned? here's a clue - YOU FORGOT THAT THIS IS JUST A WEBSITE. grow some self-awareness you pathetic sack of shit.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 7:31, closed)

^ Look, here's another one! ^
A question janet - have you ever asked yourself exactly why you're so filled with bitterness, and hateful invective?

Just asking.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 7:37, closed)

i've never worried about it, as it only seems to be you that brings it out in me.
go on then, what have YOU learned from this sorry debacle?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 18:55, closed)

So are you going to fuck off or not?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 8:57, closed)

Or not.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 9:08, closed)

Cool

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 10:50, closed)

You're not the first person to have a story reposted by AB, and I doubt you'll be the last.
Collecting /qotw responses is his thing, it's not a secret, and it's a harmless hobby. He's not the only one indulging in it, this week, either.

Can't say that I'm impressed with BD posting your offline info, though. Definitely not cool. When did that happen?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 9:18, closed)

It's happened a few times now. Mods told each time with no discernable result.
This week it was in mv's thread about Monty.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 9:25, closed)

Oh, I see.
The old "one username, multiple websites" problem. Cuntish behaviour, nonetheless.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 11:54, closed)

Hello, I'm BraynDedd.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 12:01, closed)

Hi! I'm Ed Winchester.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 17:32, closed)

Hi I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such posts as "You're reading this in my voice" and "You just lost the game."

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 17:48, closed)

And now for something completely different.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 20:12, closed)

A man
with a tape recorder up his nose.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 12:17, closed)

Don't flatter yourself tubbo, you've never once pissed me off.
I just think it's funny how upset you get about something appearing on here when you've linked the word ringofyre to your real name so thoroughly that it's the third and fifth result on google. Plus the mods probably don't care on account of you being a shitposting attention seeker.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 10:23, closed)

Another classy response from BD.
It kinda saddens me that I have to point this out.
Getting info on people isn't that hard. Whether they make it easy or hard.
Trust me finding out who you were was a priority for me after you first posted my details.
But.. and here's the rub, posting that info isn't ok. For a number of reasons, not least of which it is expressly against the rules of this site.
The fact that you do think it's ok speaks volumes about the sort of person you are in real life. It also shows that for someone who thinks they clever - you're a bit dumb.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 10:51, closed)

We all know he'll be back next week anyway.
He's that lacking in attention and validation from anyone in real life he has to come here for abuse from anonymous time-wasting shitcunts.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 13:26, closed)

Calls self
"anonymous time-wasting shitcunt"

Accuses me of lacking in attention and validation....
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 14:05, closed)

You're the one who keeps coming back to a place where people do little else except make fun of you, Robert.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 14:42, closed)

My name isn't Robert.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:06, closed)

Sorry Rob.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:12, closed)

Much better.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:26, closed)

Does this mean you're breaking up with us?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 13:28, closed)

It's not me.
It's you.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 13:34, closed)

This is not 4chan
And whilst bad etiquette, you're not actually going to have anything bad happen to you IRL if your real name is posted on here.

I think everyone here considers themselves well-versed in Internet culture, and part of that is having the sense not to post things that can be used against you and/or making it easy for your real details to be found. Nobody made you post anything on here, nobody made you give out personal info, just be grateful that people here aren't as vindictive as those on 4chan, because then you really would be fucked.
(Eukanuba, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 14:12, closed)

well put

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 14:24, closed)

Most of all, nobody makes him keep coming back for more.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 14:43, closed)

That's true
In fact you might say it's very fair, Holmes.
(Eukanuba, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 15:36, closed)

*cricket applause*

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 17:16, closed)

But I didn't
"give out personal info". I used a username. One which I've used on many other accounts for many years.
As BD has found out googling that username gives you some RL info about me - I've got no problem with that at all. If I did I would've changed usernames on different sites over the years.
Posting that info here (considering it's explicitly against the rules) is however not cool. At no point have I said that it was ok. At no point have I asked anyone to post my details here nor have I given anyone permission to do so.
The difference between seeking out that info and posting it here is fucking astronomical.
In much the same way that when BD first posted my name here, I made sure that I found out who he is in RL (it's really not that hard) - not for the purpose of posting those details on a public forum but simply to ascertain that he wasn't an axe-wielding, paedo psycho. Despite his big chin and fucked up attitude I'm happy to say that he isn't.

Put very simply - if you have kids and they share your surname, would you be comfortable with your details being posted here?
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 23:41, closed)

I'm certainly not a paedo, that's true.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 23:50, closed)

But you did headbutt that guy to death, and then eat his heart. So I heard, anyway.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:04, closed)

Nah, I headbutted his heart out of him then made him eat it.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:09, closed)

If you did that in Scotland, you'd be legally married.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:21, closed)

You'd die of cholestoral poisoning if you ate a Scottish heart

(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 16:01, closed)

Well you weren't on any registers that I searched.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:05, closed)

Right, so you've ended up having to search registers in a paranoia-fuelled frenzy after someone googled your username then typed some words onto the internet that were already on the internet.
Protip: if you're that worried, don't link your real name to your username so thoroughly, then act like a spastic on a site full of cunts.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:11, closed)

It would probably make you more attractive
if you where more of pedophile.......
(bad_advice QOTW survivor from the first trollocost!, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:16, closed)

I completely agree that posting personal details (such as might be used to track a person down and get all Honda on their ass) is a bit below the belt. That said, if all someone has done is check a few easily accessible websites for the same username and post the results, it's probably fair to assume that any Accordionist would do the same, anyhow. It's bad form, but probably not going to place you or your family at any increased risk.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:14, closed)

Whereas he appears to have gone to considerably more effort to find out who I am.
WHO'S REALLY IN THE WRONG HERE, EH?
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:15, closed)

I was going to say you, but I don't want to be cranially murdered to death.

Ah, fuck it, you.

I'll wear a helmet.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:46, closed)

I'll wear I am

LOLZORS!
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:47, closed)

oh, you've done it now
his heart will be well and truly broken now that one of his idols has openly disagreed with him
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:11, closed)

While I don't condone publicising your personal details on here, I don't think you can be particularly indignant as 1) you've spread them so widely yourself that any nutcase can find you with google if they so choose, and 2) you confirmed that they where your personal details when they were posted by saying "hey, that's my actual identity".
(cs1ca, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:48, closed)

*were*

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:54, closed)

So, the only objection you have to my statement is the typo. That was easier than I thought.
(cs1ca, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:27, closed)

What the fuck has this got to do with the question
You really are a needy prick
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:40, closed)

Bottom line
B3ta is an irrelevant website.

Nobody here would be arsed to actually fuck you over IRL.

It doesn't matter if people know your real name as they have better things to do with their time.

My real name is Andy Wain and I live in Cardiff. Let's see how fucked over I get.
(Eukanuba, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 23:39, closed)

I reckon I can make Cardiff in an hour.
You will rue the day.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 23:59, closed)

My bumhole is covered in Vaseline
You'd best get here before it dries out.
(Eukanuba, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 1:43, closed)

Pleased to meet you Andy.
Happy to gaz you my skype name if you want a chat.
You know - since you're ready to go and all.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 2:41, closed)

Thanks
But I don't want to “cyber” with an Australian, the accent would put me off my stroke.
(Eukanuba, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 16:39, closed)

Hi Andy
My name is Andy too but i live in Sheffield. Is it true that you can get excellent massive drugs in Cardiff?
p.s Schwafega takes longer to dry and adds a pleasing element of friction to proceedings
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 16:04, closed)

This is the most sinister invasion of the Andies since the days of Pizarro.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 18:34, closed)

Cardiff does have some excellent drugs from time to time, yes
I went to Sheffield once. I saw Ultraviolence at Corporation. That's the extent of my Sheffield-knowledge.
(Eukanuba, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 18:55, closed)

We have some pretty good pubs and some great breweries too

(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Wed 18 Sep 2013, 10:20, closed)

Bad example. You live in Cardiff
you're already as fucked over as is humanly possible.
(ringofyre, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 8:23, closed)

What do kids have to do with it?
Unless b3ta is secretly a cover for a noncing ring I don't see the problem, and even if it was I doubt any of the nonces herein would make the effort to go to Australia for a cheeky fiddle. Most streets have children living in them you know, and I doubt that yours are sexy enough to be worth the bother.
(Eukanuba, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 16:46, closed)

This is Star Wars, isn't it?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 19:11, closed)

I do
somewhat sympathise with you, having to put up with bile and bitterness from those that seem to devote their lives to snide remarks about you and your family.

I also understand that writing all that out may be cathartic, but please keep the moaning off the QOTW part of b3ta - you're not helping yourself.

Ta.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Sat 14 Sep 2013, 20:14, closed)

I was impressed there...
Then I noticed the line breaks.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Sat 14 Sep 2013, 23:15, closed)

He's merely following the instruction: "break up stories".
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:21, closed)

This
is the best response, this week.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:59, closed)

Excellent.
Well played.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Sun 15 Sep 2013, 16:00, closed)

Best response ever!

( da5id <YOUR SIG HERE>, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:22, closed)

applause
well played
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 16:05, closed)

It's
bloody awkward typing on a phone with a head dobber.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:53, closed)

Get a grip...
If I had £1 for every time AB's reposted one of my stories - I'd be a fucking billionaire!

It's all part of the so called fun. As I asked in my flounce...why do you keep on coming back for more? And why do you give so much about yourself away? You tell your crappy 'stories', deeply personal stories surrounding your family, illness, money etc - with way too much real life detail.

What do you seriously expect the results to be? A big fat love-in where we all feel your pain and help you to grow and become a better person? Seriously, how would you like everyone to behave when you post? I'd be very interested to know.

They say the true definition of madness is doing the same thing time after time after time and expecting a different result. Kinda appropriate here - don't you think?
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:26, closed)

I thought you already were a billionaire.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:28, closed)

Millionaire my friend, millionaire.

( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:29, closed)

I thought that particular financial milestone was scheduled for this time next week.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:30, closed)

Huge jump in coffee maker sales?

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:34, closed)

Stop it.
Stop taking the piss out of me.

It's not fair. Leave me alone.

I'm telling.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:39, closed)

"I'm telling" is always preceded by "AmmmmMMMMMMMMMM, "
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:43, closed)

I mean it.
You're all rude about my career. You're rude about my choice of coffee making equipment. You're disrespectful with regards to my hotmail hacking hobby.

I didn't sign up for this.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:48, closed)

There's always the
"Emergency Scooter Taxi Service" to fall back on tho, isn't there?
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:49, closed)

And you know the worst thing?
The worst thing imaginable? The ultimate in internet hatred?



No one believes a fucking word I say.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:57, closed)

Sometimes I think you and I are not so dissimilar.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:23, closed)

Difference being Liemallow is entertaining and still quite likable due to not being a massive whining prick.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:26, closed)

And you know the worst thing?
The worst thing imaginable? The ultimate in internet hatred?

Not one new friend or follow request. :(
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:39, closed)

I think you missed my point.
Too subtle?
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:42, closed)

don't be too harsh on yourself
most people believed you were a creepy email stalker

it was the trivially disproved twaddle about property and scooters that people scoffed at
(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 8:56, closed)

Disproved?
By your kangaroo court of pig-ignorance?

Lol.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:41, closed)

you couldn't even remember how many houses you were selling, you fat jew

(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 11:44, closed)

Uh, uh......

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 11:58, closed)

Upset much?

( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 15:49, closed)

devastated

(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 16:04, closed)

In reverse order - everyone needs a hobby, I genuinely hope you enjoyed your temporally displaced coffee (that stuff must command quite a premium - I'd buy it myself if I had a property empire), and I'm sure your carer is lovely.

See? We can all get along.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 0:52, closed)

Why not just leave?
Seriously. Do you enjoy being on here? Obviously not. Are you just staying to show the "trolls" that you won't give in? It's just a website, there's no need. Log off and go for a walk, delete the bookmark, block the site if you need to, there are other websites you might enjoy more.
( Zuowan, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 8:19, closed)

he does this every week when his dreary tales of the australian mundane don't get any attention
every single fucking week
(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 8:53, closed)

I hear mumsnet is good at this time of year.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 10:15, closed)

God sake
Look - rule #1 with trolls (as you constantly describe them) - don't feed them. But you do, EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME. Then you wonder why they go for you? Rebutting their attacks will never work. This website here is for pisstaking on an industrial scale, and you fall for it EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME. Every time you get all "upset on the internet" , you come across as a retard. Want to fight back? Say something cutting AND FUNNY. But stop the goddamn whining.
(McChinaman banned, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 9:51, closed)

You seem upset.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 10:03, closed)

Just giving some troot

(McChinaman banned, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 10:18, closed)

Fish?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 19:50, closed)

you're kinda doing the same here
the drippy neckbeard thrives on exactly the sorry of attention you're giving him
(alright alright, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 11:46, closed)

Trolls feeding trolls feeding trolls.
(DaftenDirekt, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 1:27, closed)

Yeah, just fuck off you tedious prick

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:42, closed)

There's that hospitality
I've come to know and love.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 12:54, closed)

Badger, Brandead, Jeofry.... the hound.
Badger, Brandead, Jeofry.... the hound.
Badger, Brandead, Jeofry.... the hound.
Badger, Brandead, Jeofry.... the hound.

that's a Game Of Thrones refference fact fans.
( G/PP &#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 14:21, closed)

Nothing more to add, but it'd be a crying shame if this didn't make it to 100 replies.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 15 Sep 2013, 23:29, closed)

CONGRATULATIONS, USER 2663, AKA "MONSTER MUNCH"!!!
As the 100th contributor to this thread, cementing its reputation as "officially epic", you have won an ALL EXPENSES PAID trip to the north of Eire, in the bucolic and delightful surroundings of County Wicklow. Steeped in history, your destination has played host to many noteworthy individuals - up to and including the great and locally beloved Oliver Cromwell himself! With charming scenery and and a beautiful harbour, the nature-lover in you will not be disappointed. And if you're of a more sporting bent - the town's pedigree could not be more immaculate, claiming both Olympic boxing champion Katie Taylor, and Irish football club Cumann Peile Fánaithe Bhré, winners of the FAI Cup in both 1990 and 1999. Indeed, whilst enjoying the hospitality of the latter, manager Pat Devlin will give you a personal guided tour of the fabled Carlisle Grounds, covering its history, development, and role in the modern game - culminating in an excursion to the club's trophy room, where he will show you where the Bray cup store is.

Once again - MANY CONGRATULATIONS, AND ENJOY YOUR TRIP!
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 0:51, closed)

Is this the part where I give you my bank details?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 8:47, closed)

Don't worry.
We've already got them.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 9:34, closed)

And only thirty of them are Rob Fairholme.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 8:49, closed)

Don't worry Precious
I got your number real early.
I 'm pleased to see that your email spam filters work.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 9:08, closed)

0402 373 841
That number?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 9:21, closed)

At least he hasn't got a mafia uncle like Bou.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:07, closed)

I got yet another friend request from Bou only a few weeks back.
They just don't make hysterical obsessives of stern enough stuff in Australia like they do in South Africa.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:42, closed)

Ring it.
EDIT: I am glad to see that my hotfrog thingy is still up. There's a few details I may need to update tho. Thanks for cluing me into that shambo. You internet sleuth you.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 11:57, closed)

You're welcome, grampa toad.
No idea what hot frog is though. Another seedy site where you flirt with pictures of your ex step-daughter?

That's right, search engines. Rob Fairholme of Perth flirts online using his ex-wife's daughter as a profile picture.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 13:33, closed)

Only been married once that I know of. And I've only got 1 kid, again that I know of.
So sorry, no fucking idea what you're on about there.

I'm intrigued tho about that no. - that's my 2nd sim. I use it mainly for organising sports teams, volunteer stuff and various committees and such. I haven't used it as my main no. for more than a couple of years now.
It'd be nice to know where you found it, if only so I can update it to my current work number.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 20:12, closed)

See, there you go again.
Someone posts a random string of digits: "Oh yeah, that's my mobile number."

You're a fucking idiot, you're massively paranoid about your family's safety but you'll post every single detail you can think of all over the internet and immediately cop to it when someone posts them.

Oh, and it's not a particularly long route from your linkedin profile to here www.truelocal.com.au/business/chairware/woodvale
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 20:47, closed)

It's like taking sweets from a baby.
Then repeatedly bouncing the sweets off the baby's stupid face while it gurns and dribbles and shits itself.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 20:59, closed)

Good man!

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:14, closed)

fuck didn't realise he was a captain of industry
does he wash car windows too?
(alright alright, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 11:28, closed)

So what you're saying here is that you came over all Marshmallow and found out who everyone is IRL because you felt that your mediocre life and disappointing family were threatened by some anonymous bellends pissing about on the internet?
You really are a paranoid mental attention seeking prick.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 9:58, closed)

I quite like the idea that a provincial computer fix-it guy has 'tested' the email system of a multi-million pound engineering company.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:06, closed)

I'm amused that he hasn't figured out that none of us are real and this is all in his head.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:25, closed)

^^^ This reply to win

(Eukanuba, Tue 17 Sep 2013, 18:56, closed)

Wow
This is a lot of replies.
(squigbobble existed, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 9:25, closed)

you're the /qotw equivalent of Happytoast on /board
narcissistic prick
(The Goderator trumped and you smelt it, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 10:59, closed)

He can add some generic features to a zombie template and people will piss themselves over it?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 11:17, closed)

The narcissism is pretty ironic given that he looks like grandpa munster fucked a toad.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 11:34, closed)

alright HT's comedy account

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 20:55, closed)

Australians
do this.
...then call us 'whinging'.

It's the antipodean chip. Used to get it from them on my old website.
Wheras most people who get pissed off with a particular website realise that it's far simpler and more dignifying to simply stop typing the url into your address bar, Australians were the ones who had to make a song and dance about it and attempt a speech before fucking off...if indeed they actually did fuck off, and not just return within weeks under a different username.
(dchurch bah, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 12:22, closed)

They really are a nation of weakling drama queens who can't hold their pissweak lager.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 13:11, closed)

Auswailia.
Australiwaaaah.
Etc.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 13:19, closed)

Just recently moved to Oz
Shit.
(DaftenDirekt, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 13:34, closed)

You'll be grand.
Economic migrants to Ozwailia do really well because the local competition is so feeble.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 14:49, closed)

...another...
b3ta.com/questions/tantrums/post1683067?highlight=answers-post-1683307
(dchurch bah, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 16:29, closed)

Aw, man.
I liked Ken. And his bumhole stories.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 19:14, closed)

He's not even in my top ten bumhole stories.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 20:13, closed)

Oh emvee, you fucking tragedy.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 19:32, closed)

Your old website?
Whinging & moaning.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Thu 19 Sep 2013, 6:42, closed)