Ahhhh how all out shall I make this post? Let's go crazy...
Okay I've been heavily into the fetish game since I was 17, and I mean heavily.. I've done essentially everything you could think of at one time or another, and ended up on the net and DVD for varying fetishistic reasons.

Sooo.. up until a few months ago I was in a committed relationship with a pup (that is, a submissive who is also into Master/Dog roleplay, he had a very developed pup mindset) for 18 months, he was the most successful of a string of M/S relationships I had while a rather accomplished dominant. For a young 'un, I'm bloody good at it.

Since then i've come to realise my true calling is actually in submission (massive epiphany ahoy!), and I'm proud to say I'm actually an owned slave myself. I wear the tag of my Master 24/7 and I couldn't be happier. Brillo.

At the same time however I do pro-domming as well, because currently I've moved to pretty much the most expensive place in the universe, and I've only just got a job. Huzzah! So I spend evenings curled up at my Master's feet, only to go and dom the fuck out of some old guy for cash. Also, brillo.

So let's whizz through some of my fetishes...

SENSORY DEPRIVATION/BREATH CONTROL= Massively into powerplay and exchange, in both roles. The less I can do, or the less a sub can do under my control the better. Hoods, gags and blindfolds ftw. Breath control is the logical extension of the powerplay, requiring fuckloads of trust and confidence you know what you're doing. I know very much what I'm doing, and have taken BC to its extremes, and downright love havig it done to me. Nothing like being on the verge of unconsciousness under the control of someone else and being completely helpless to do anything about it.

BONDAGE= Yay bondage, in all its forms.. being tied up and tying up is always gonna be frikkin awesome. I'm quite good at escaping stuff, so give me chains and padlocks anyday, far more secure! Ropework I can usually wangle my way out... haha. Started out my kinky life modelling on a well known gay amateur bondage site, and went from there really.

RUBBER= Well anything skintight really, rubber, neoprene (got a tonne of wetsuits, bout to sell a load on ebay if anyone is into it!?) and lycra... love the feel, love the smells, love the look. Spent far too much on gear in the past years, and it takes up far too much space. Leather also a winner.

S&M= My Master has turned me into a right masochistic little bitch it has to be said, love my pain... drops me into subspace far too easily. Sadistic as fuck too, I love doling it out in equal measures.

TT= Tit torture, nipple play... massively sensitive round there, and a brilliant play, as you can really ramp up how hard you're playing.. can be light and sensual right up to stupidly hard and agonising. Either way gets me grinning like a loon.

other things would be watersports, hypnotism, anal play, pup play, footy kit, cages, tickle torture (as top) and heh pretty much everything else.. ever. Yeah I've even tried scat, its... alright. Nothing to write home about. It's SLIGHTLY less minging than you'd expect, but only slightly.

Oh yeah, and I really wanna try vac-racking, its pretty much the only thing I've not done yet. Two rubber sheets in a frame, get in the middle, vacuum sucks the air out, leaving you trapped in between in complete rubber bondage. Oh go on then.

I'm a filthy git. It's all good.
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 0:15, 59 replies)

Niche Market
My friend Jim, who for convenience sake shall hence forth be known as Jim, was wondering the streets of Prague on the usual guys trip when a Pimp approached his party and gave them the unique offer of "THREE BLACK MIDGETS IN JACUZZI!". If that is not a once in a life time offer I don't know what is.


Length...well they were midgets
(The Liquorice Allstar I need cricket, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 0:08, Reply)

Pink silk knickers
First time, be gentle.

Pink silk knickers with side ties. The silk has to be thick, quality, heavy silk and they must have side ties. The thicker silk provides just the right friction as my husband and I discovered on a long train journey last summer, one which we now regularly make. The rhythm of the train, the friction of the silk which with the right maneuvering provides just the right pressure on my clit to make my lips swell and glaze, soaking the silk to a deep crimson. My husband likes to sit opposite and watch. Wrap skirt/dress with stockings essential for this so I can part my thighs just so and flick the skirt fabric back over my legs if necessary so he can see how much I am soaking the silk and watch the wet patch spread. We see how long we can go without either of us actually fingering my wet silky lips. The longer we wait, the better the pay off. If the environment allows, he likes to undo the ties and use the silk to rock the fabric against my clit pulling the silk back and fore across my pussy with him grasping the silk in a firm fist at front and back, still no actual finger play yet but spreading the wet patch. If we can fuck where we are, the silk knickers stay on as long as we can manage, him fucking the silk in and out of my pussy. The side tie ones can also be used as blindfold/hand ties.

Hotel bathrooms. Being shoved over the cold tiled bathroom vanity, nipples stiffening against the cold tiles, all those mirrors. Hair pulling: on all fours, him behind me, his one hand grasping/slapping my bottom and the other with a handful of my hair pulling/tugging and the closer we are the more frantic and painful I can take it. He likes to slip his fingers into me before we have to do something formal eg dinner party/drinks with friends so he can look at me and sniff/suck his fingers without anyone else clocking the slight smirk. Sleazy talk, I'm a good girl day to day so the filthier the better. Rapid shallow breathing so I go a bit light headed intensifies a rough, quickie. We also both love it when you get so wet and sweaty from grasping at one another that your skin sticks together and we can hear the sticky whacking of his balls when he's behind me pounding into me or when he slaps his cock across my face.
(dlg, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 22:54, 5 replies)

Ok here goes....
Wearing tight skimpy pants, shitting in a bath then wanking over it and a bit of zoophilia. I have also had sex while we were both pissing...and when I'm drunk I tend to turn gay(ish)

Length? Yellow stuff came out her mouth.
(WhataYob, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 22:44, 5 replies)

my favourite QOTW ever
I have absolutely loved reading the posts this week. Its been most stimulating. As for me - I've encountered foot fetishists, boys who dreamed of being gunged, gameshow style, subs, sissys and people just up for anything fun.
For me though, the killer is not playing out the actual fantasy as of itself. Its watching how gleefully excited he gets when he knows his dream is about to come true.
It makes me feel like a sexual Santa.
(insomniac girl all my best things are in hock, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 21:57, 3 replies)

Glasses
Can anybody explain why a female is always more attractive while wearing glasses, im sure im not the only one.

After telling miss pirate she went to the opticians to see about buying a fake pair and discovered that she in fact needed them and had done for some time.

A good thing she found this out when she did because due to poor eyesight she could have walked in front of a bus.

So there you have it folks, fetishes save lives.
(rocknroll_pirate had a dream involving holly willoughby and custard, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 21:52, 1 reply)

Nude in public
Now ive signed up an account just to answer this. As a long time lurker ive often had a bit of a story to tell but never thought it would be risable enough to bother. However, this could be way too cathartic not too! MY fetish (or kink as has been pointed out) is to be naked in public. Ive always been careful with it, never wanting to seem like some kind of flasher or owt. Most often ill wait till after dark and lie in the mud in the back yard and wank myself into oblivion. In the past it has been out in the countryside not far from my house. The thing is I have to be completely naked or it aint right! Does anyone else have this???? I have done "nearly" every fetish in the book. Dressup, Anal, Watersports (gave and received), Simulated Rape (her choice, literally i broke in to her house(the door was unlocked, master crim me!) and knocked of the power, found her in the dark, tied her too a radiator and fucked the living daylights out of her real savage like droog), fucked in public, fucked in car, had sexual contact with a bloke (im definatly not gay, i dont find men attractive but I did it at the time purely cus it was depraived), S&M and light to heavy bondage & Extremeley and i mean EXTREMELY hardcore sex. Literally if it aint kids, animals or dead things then its all gravy for me. The biggest kick i ever had, lying naked in a field in the sticks (near the moors so no folks) in the mud and pouring rain, wanking myself while the girl i was dating watched on (she was a weird as i). Is it just me with the naked outdoor thing??? Am i strange????
(theotherotherwhitemeat, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 21:46, 4 replies)

ears
you know that bloke, the tall, skinny bloke? the one with really big ears? everybody knows at least one of these blokes. they're often redheads, but that's not important.
the important thing is his ears.
not only are this bloke's ears big, they're huge. they look slightly like bacon rind(the really fatty kind) and, if he is standing with his back to any convenient light source, his ears will glow red.
i like those ears.
i really, really, REALLY like those ears.
i like to nibble them.
i like to play with them.
i like to try folding them up into little triangular parcels on the side of his head.
i may sleep with a ginger if he's really good-looking, but if he's got those ears, he could be merely average-looking and i will still jump his bones.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 21:09, 7 replies)

Transgender porn
As a connoisseur of the arts I have watched a load of filth and fapped like a chimpanzee from chester zoo naturally. After firing my load to a MMF threesome I thought to myself 'God, that's a bit gay.' Two contorted sweaty man faces as they squeezed out the muck for all it's worth over the obliging sweetheart.

What would be much straighter would be MFTg(Transgender porn) Only one sweaty contorted man face, two beautiful busty ladies(for all extents and purposes) It was great seeing the two lithe female bodies ramming all orifices of obliging sweetheart, until the tranny bummed the man, I didnt like that part,
(ihaveab3tanamenow, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 20:26, Reply)

Please can we have something more sedate for our next QOTW.
Your hilarious knitting disasters or silly places I left my pen.


I've been walking around with the female equivalent of stiffy all week.
( girlinthehole, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 20:00, 12 replies)

I think my profile name says it all really.
My only regret is not starting the freaky stuff earlier on in life.

I'd be fucking great at it by now.
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 19:44, 2 replies)

Are you...
...on IC?
(ME-tan, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 19:15, 6 replies)

Confused...
OK, last one from me this week. Deliberating whether to share this, but fuck it – why the hell not?

Back in my younger days, early twenties, I developed a strange attraction for a person I worked with. This individual was witty, funny, great company, and all in all a throughly decent bloke. I’ll say that again: A – THROUGHLY – DECENT - .... BLOKE... Yes, for one brief summer I really did think I’d crossed over to the gay side – my secret love of the cock was pretty damn alarming, and I started drinking heavily. Got nothing against gayers, but the thought of having to take on a big hard cock scared the absolute shit out of me. I didn’t follow through with this bloke at work. He had a storming row with the boss one morning and left, never to be seen again. And that left a great big bicurious hole in my life (and possibly in my arse area), that needed to be filled.

So on my next trip to the smoke I went out with with a load of my gay mates (now comrades in cock) to the gay bars in Soho. And for the first time in fucking ages I was excited and exhillirated at the thought of getting my willy out in front of a total stranger for a frantic, drunken, fuck session. Only this time my partner wouldn’t have tits. This time it was going to be very different. It was going to be meat light sabre duels at dawn. I was going in for the cornhole and I was fucking loving it.

Anyway, being a bit of a weak-minded twat, I set about getting up a bit of Dutch courage. I sat and drank myself into a semi-stupor, scanning the pub for a fella who could take my gayboy cherry. But it just didn’t seem to work. I didn’t actually fancy any of them. In hindsight I realised this was because I’m a raging heterosexual, but at the time I couldn’t see the wood for the trees. I was in the captial of gayness and I wanted some hot manmeant. I went and got a load more drinks and necked them.

After an hour or so more of this an incredibly butch looking man approached me and we got chatting. Shit! Here we go. Hmmmm... Not exactly my type but... Ahh, a cocks a cock, I suppose. A few more double rums later and I find myself in a toilet cubicle with this man. I’m disgusted and excited, he’s a big man, tall, broad shouldered, a slight fuzz of facial hair and a fucking greased back quiff. I’m also pissed off my fucking tits.

He locks the door, turns, and starts rubbing his hand over my crotch. Disgusted but strangely excited I close my eyes and before you know it I’m playing tonsil tennis with a man. A big strong butch man. His hand expertly unzips my fly and pulls out my cock, I’m hard, very hard. He starts stroking his firm fingers up and down my shaft and in his deep masculine voice he says: “You like that, darlin? Hmmm? You like that?” And I fucking do. It’s absolutely fucking amazing.

And then – even though I’m not too sure what I’m doing – I reach over and undo the button on his Levis, I reach inside his pants, searching for his probably massive, tree trunk sized cock. And I find...

nothing...

Confused I dig a little deeper, my fingers probing through his wiery bush. Nothing! NOTHING? FUCKING NOTHING!!! And I reach down further, he’s still wanking me off, I can taste his beer on my lips and in my mouth as he probes and laps at my tonsils. And then I find it...

...a moist gash.

I pull back, disgusted: “You’re a fucking woman?” I slur. S/he lets go of my cock, starts to protest, points out her MASSIVE tits that I was too drunk to register. Starts swearing at me. I get the hell out of there and run off into the Soho night. Confused... Yep... Turned on.... Yep... Eventually I stopped, pulled myself together, puked, and realised I’m really not very gay at all. And then I vomitted some more. She was, without doubt, the ugliest fucking minger in the entire fucking world. And she’d just been wanking me off (which I suppose is a result of sorts)....
( SpankyHanky, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 17:30, 13 replies)

A more normal one
After posting a more filthy one this morning, I'll go with something far more normal now. A woman's shapely legs wrapped in stockings never fails to do it for me - preferably dark, perhaps seamed or full fashioned, it doesn't really matter. Seeing the lacey stocking top peeping out from below a skirt is instant boner material on the right girl.

Is that more to everyone's taste?
(cfvp, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:59, 2 replies)

H-2-ohhhhh!- ohhhhh!-ohhhh
Water floats my boat
( bazza van der trance , ooh baby baby, baby baby. Get up on this., Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:52, Reply)

Am I normal?
I am very embarrassed by my fetish as it really does not befit a sixth form girl with plans to become either a swimwear model or a gymnast. The truth is that I am really turned on by middle aged men, preferably a bit over-weight and maybe even balding. Now if this chap knows his way around a computer, drinks too much or has a weakness for narcotics, has an encyclopaedic knowledge of a minority interest such as obscure indie bands or cult movies I am just turned on all the more.

The clincher for me though is that he has a series of failed relationships behind him and a false sense of self worth – God I am creaming like Dairycrest just thinking of this hunk.

Sadly I do not know where to find such a man so will probably die a lonely virgin with just my selection of sex toys and lingerie to keep me company.

Sigh!
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:20, 10 replies)

I think i can link fetishes with OCD
I love to have my cock thoroughly cleaned which is probably due to my OCD.

The fetish part comes from me getting it cleaned by the inside of some girls mouth.
(NuffMuff fucks shrubbery, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:13, Reply)

BDSM Personals
Having some submissive urges, I've been doing the rounds of the fetish sites meeting a few Doms who seem to share similar interests. It's always a little nerve-wracking as these people know your deepest darkest secret fantasies before you meet them, and then you meet them.

I'd been corresponding with one Dom for about a month, exchanged a few messages, a little online chat. I knew he was into anal, ass play, enemas, bondage, nipple torture, rimming, talking dirty... the usual stuff, but we shared very little about real life... jobs locations, photos etc. Anyway, we had enough shared interests to compell us to meet for coffee.

When the time came, I turned up at the coffee shop, and immediately came face-to-face with a former teacher, my immediate reaction was 'now I'm going to have to be nice to this teacher while I'm looking for my potential Dom'... and then the penny dropped.... Aaaargh!! There are things you should NEVER find out about your teachers.

I recognised him (mainly because I've fancied him for years), but he didn't recognise me, but I let him know immediately we knew each other from real life. I almost ran, but decided to stay, and ended up having a lovely evening, but no play.

What was actually my worst nightmare came true, but turned out to be lovely, it's great to find 'normal' people with similar interests. We've kept in touch, and he's been a good shoulder to cry on.... but I'll never forget figuring it all out saying rather too loudly 'I know who the fuck you are'!
(Rubadubsub, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:09, 2 replies)

I quite enjoy a good snog
especially if it's my penis she's snogging
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 16:01, Reply)

Tales of an ex -pro Domme
I was a Pro-Domme (Dominatrix, whatever you want to call it) for a few years whgilst living in the West Country. I love fetishes - mine and other peoples'.

In that time I have met quite a few characters, and seen and done quite a few things: people like the sissy maid who wanted to be tied with rope and have his/her feet caned; the woman who loved having her feet tied to a chair and then tickled with feathers; the guy who paid me an indecent sum of money to straddle him and flick his nipples whilst making small talk about ordinary things; and the "Headmaster" who tested my powers of improvisation by making me recount (with no time to prepare in advance) exactly what had led me to his "office" wearing the wrong colour knickers.

I have caned someone till they bled, flogged someone till they cried, tied up and teased a serving police officer with a penchant for rope, and much, much more.

I also spent 3 years as a sub to another pro-Domme, and in that time I have also been caned till I bled and flogged till I screamed. I have a particular fetish for knives and other sharp and bladed implements.

I've done Scenes naked and in public (the Skin2 after party was just...wicked), and I've laughed, cried, begged, pleaded and thanked my way through that and other relationships. There's very little I won't try as a sub or as a Domme, if I'm with the right person.

I fucking love my life sometimes.
(Biscuit Burlesque wants to be Dita von Teas, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 15:00, 4 replies)

She told me "take off my panties right now"
"And next time buy your own."
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 14:39, Reply)

Coconuts and cocoa butter
Nimrodihnio reminded me of the beauty that is cocoa butter. That and coconut (body cream ideally) are an instant ticket to stonksville. In fact, I'd go so far to say it IS a fetish, the smell of both of these drive my hormones off the chart. My favorite combination has to be cocoa body butter and coconut shampoo/conditioner. The warming cocoa when my head's between those breasts, coming up for air and a kiss brings me to the electric zing of the coconut neck kissing.
You know that flush of blood and heat to the face that means you're REALLY hot for it right now? That's what writing this has led to. Just imagine that tenfold when I get those delicious smells turning my meat into rock. In fact, heard of the two-hand technique? That and cocoa butter..... Oops too much heat for now!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 14:19, Reply)

When your Dad's as evil as ours, incest seems OK to me
So I get a message from my twin sister to say our Dad won't let her out of her room. Springing her might sound simple but it took a surprising amount of ingenuity; we hadn't seen each other in some time and I had to rope in a decidedly dicey bunch of characters to help. This one bloke was hairier than anyone I've met before or since, and I couldn't understand a bloody word he said. Then there was this lad who was a proper Flash Harry, with his souped-up motor and his daft waistcoat and stripey trousers. After we got my sis away from Dad I knew he was thinking about making a play for her.

I wasn't having that. Told him it was best he didn't think about it. This might sound a bit weird, but my sister's HOT. Bit short, with rubbish hair, like me, but boy does she fill a bikini well. Only thing is, she didn't KNOW we were once the same egg. So when she kissed me, right in front of the other guy, I was over the moon. Thought all my dreams were coming true.

So, I think, she's into this, let's break the news to her. Apparently she'd always known, but somehow she didn't feel the same as me. I go off to have a chat with Dad and when I come back her and Mr Waistcost have hooked up. Bloody typical. I had to play the brotherly affection card because apparently wanting to fuck your sister is frowned upon, even a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

Length? Extends to nearly three feet. And glows bright green.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 14:11, 8 replies)

Rubbery to meet you
"Could I ask you for a favour?", asks the unassuming stranger to my good lady friend, whom we shall call R. The two of us are attending an alternative-lifestyle market in order to point and laugh at the double-ended rubber dongs, nipple clamps, and electric shock devices with attachments for various intimate regions.

I must at this point note that aforementioned R has seen, heard of, and in some cases even tried, pretty much every fetish going. She's rather proud that no matter what it is you're into, she's probably done something filthier.

"I don't know, what is it you need?" enquireth she, half expecting some unwanted advances on her person.

"Could you blow a balloon up, as much as you possibly can, while I watch and wank?"

R stares.

"And if you can make it burst, that'd be even better".

R blinks.

"erm..... er..... er.... excuse me... I...", she mutters and walks off, speechless, crashing into a rack of riding crops, scattering them across the floor.

Balloon guy, if you're out there, you are a legend.
( admiral crunch holds the newsreader's nose squarely, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 14:04, 1 reply)

Is there any point
any of the rest of us contributing... or should we just relax and let Spanky do his worst?



That came out very differently than I intended

And yet I'm not re-wording it. Odd.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 13:41, 7 replies)

Undoubtedly the sexiest, most thrilling, amazing turn on is to hear someone say: “I love you...”
Preferably while they’re decked out in studded, oiled crotchless PVC, squatting on a glass coffee table, pissing, with a leek up their arse while an Alsatian licks your nutsack and a couple of transexual albinos in riot gear take it in turns to slurp on your fat one, while you’ve got your mouth burried in a crab-infested amutee midgets hot clunge as she wanks off a donkey as she calls you a “dirty fuckslut whore dog tiny-dicked shit stabbing clam licker,” in German...
( SpankyHanky, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 13:17, 11 replies)

sex fet etc
mild by some standards I know, so while standing, a lady rubbing her herself on me especially my thighs, slightly to one side preferably stockings only, brushing her tits on my chest and arms while reaching around stroking me and cupping my clockweights, oiled up or even better cocoabutter all after a slow massage from extremities inward culminating in the above then at the vinegar stroke she drops and takes the liquid expression of my lust onto her chest just about takes the fucking biscuit every time.
either that or a soapy complete body to body massage by a oriental female
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 27 Oct 2009, 12:52, 1 reply)

Barry the Zoophile
Barry had always been a bit of a quirky fellow. Firstly let me tell you about his head, it really was a grotesque affair; weirdly shaped with bumps and lumps coming out from every angle. It was veiny, pale and had a texture similar to that of ET; half leather, half eczema. When Barry walked, his huge head flopped about carefree, like his neck had given up trying to support it. When he spoke it was painful to listen to; a long monotonous drone. And that was him just saying his name. Not only this, he had a habit of hording anything and everything. He’d collect rubbish from around the town and hoard it under his bed, he’d defecate into old lunchboxes and put them in his freezer and towards the end of his life, he started to collect dead animals; cats, squirrels, mice, pretty much anything he sees that hadn’t got a pulse. Despite all this, I considered him a friend - he had a heart of gold and would go out of the way to help someone if they needed it. Yes, he was a bit of a recluse, but he was a great chap.

I found out about his fetish when I borrowed his laptop so I could get on with some coursework. Snooping about, as you do, I found a folder simply called ‘Fun’. I decided to open it. What I saw will stay with me forever; images of Barry violating various animals. There were a couple of pictures of him fisting miniature horses and naked in bed with goats and sheep. There were more pictures of him, naked from the waist down, fellating various breeds of dogs. They looked happy, but you could see it in their eyes how uncomfortable they really were. There were hundreds of images of Barry receiving oral sex from birds. In one, what looked like a duck, had its beak stuffed so full with Barry’s swollen member, his eyes were beginning pop out. In another picture, Barry was bent over with a live kipper dangling from his puckered anus, whilst he sodomised a squirrel. It had its bushy tail tied upwards with a ribbon, the other end of which was attached to the ceiling. I’ll never forget the confused look in the squirrels face.

I felt sick but felt I had to look on. The next pictures I found were of Barry masturbating furiously over two chickens whilst smaller birds, possibly starlings, ate bird seed from the dents in Barry’s head. Barry had his tongue out, obviously enjoying this moment. There were more. One looked as though it was taken around Christmas time as there were decorations up. A badger was lay spread-eagled on the mould ridden floor, a mop protruding from its rear end. Barry was kissing it on the head,stroking it with one hand,taking the photo with his other outstretched arm. I started to look at pictures of Barry cuddling up to a tortoise when suddenly a thought hit me. Had Barry been violating and then killing these animals? It would certainly explain the array of corpses in his house.

Gathering my thoughts I went to the police station and handed in the laptop. The next couple of days were quite traumatic to say the least. I had to give evidence against Barry and the local town found out what he had been up to. Phrases such as ‘Obese Headed Dog Fiddler’ and ‘Freaky, Mental Animal Sucker’ were daubed in graffiti onto Barry’s house.

It was really hard giving evidence against someone who had been my mate. What made it easier was when Barry tried to blame me for the images on his computer, not realising that in was indeed him in the photos! I hope all the animals that died rest in peace, especially the miniature horse with the dreadlocks; I cannot ever imagine how he must have felt.

Barry tried to hang himself twice after his arrest, but on both attempts, his head proved too heavy and the noose snapped. He was eventually put out of his misery; stabbed in the throat by a nonce after an argument over lunch duties on D wing.
(Monkey the Chicken Twitter: death_stairs, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 11:30, 5 replies)

Just FYI for those into or interested in trying piss play/watersports, who I see are oft quoting the misleading but very well known line about piss being completely sterile, it is not always completely true:
We’ve been taught since childhood that piss is dirty and we’d better wash our hands after we piss. People feel that watersports is edge play because it seems to be unhygienic, yet of all exchanges of body fluids, watersports is the least risky as the urine of a healthy person leaves the bladder nearly sterile. The acidic content is hostile to many bacteria and viruses. As many know, in the absence of pure water in World War II battlefields, urine was recommended as a substitute for cleaning wounds.

There is little to no chance of contracting HIV during piss play. The HIV virus is fragile and breaks down in the acidic liquid. The Centers for Disease Control has stated that urine doesn’t contain enough HIV to infect another person. However, watch out for a partner with an STD or a bacterial infection of the urethra. Hepatitis and other STDs may be passed along, although the risks of that are generally less than blood-to-blood contact or intercourse, but the risk is greatly increased in the presence of open cuts or bleeding gums.

Medications, other drugs, alcohol and vitamins may pass into the piss, and can be transferred if imbibed.

General good advice (as with all sexual partners) is to know the relevant condition/s of your partner before partaking.
( ..wil, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 11:27, 5 replies)