Who else finds it odd that Hazel Blears,
despite her conduct being described as "unacceptable" by the prime minister, is still a member of the Cabinet, and has still refused to take the one ring to Mount Doom in order to destroy it.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 20 May 2009, 10:16, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Tonight I am going to see
Jean Luc Picard and Gandalf performing their own special variety show which will include psychic manipulation of the audience, moving metal objects with no apparent means of propulsion, making it so, not allowing Balrogs past and waiting for someone called Godot apparently.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 20 May 2009, 10:00, 23 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

my plans for the day
get up, walk into Newmarket, get a bus into Cambridge, walk to a big tent then...


....


beer, beer, food, beer, beer, beer, stop for the afternoon, food, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, food, beer, beer, beer, stagger back to bus station and home eventually.

Wheeeeeeeeeee!!!
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 20 May 2009, 9:53, 24 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I was cycling to the office this morning...
...and my route took me right past Downing Street (I work in St Martin's Lane).

At the entrance to Downing Street, I was carved up by an official Jaguar and was justifiably able to scream "Tosser!" at the vehicle.

It's the little things that bring so much joy.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 20 May 2009, 9:53, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

My plans for today
Revise lots of the year's maths course for the last assignment on 10th Jun.

Finish laying the wooden flooring.

Trawl around Asda and get a week's worth of shopping.

Do some laundry and catch up on the Sky+ whilst doing the ironing

Meet my wife at 1pm on her dinner, take her up the foreshore and enjoy the view and the peace and quiet for an hour.

That wasn't a euphemism

Make a huge pan of beef-stew for tea.



Likelihood of doing all of this - maybe less-than 40%
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 20 May 2009, 9:14, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

B3ta BASH anyone?
www.thisisbristol.co.uk/homepage/Cat-lost-kittens-attack-yobs/article-1005728-detail/article.html

Get yourselves over to Coronation Road, Kingswood in Bristol and bash some youths.

They are all fair game.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 20 May 2009, 9:09, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Good Morning B3ta!
Today is a completely normal day.

That's right, nothing different here at all.

*sings* Happy Birthday to me...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 20 May 2009, 8:38, 22 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Celebrity MPs
Ester Rantzen says she wants to be my MP in darkest Luton, instead of the sitting moneygrabber.

Which celebrity would you like as your MP? I think Barry Cryer would get my vote. We could all have a laugh then.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 20 May 2009, 7:32, 14 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

good morning b3tans
How are you all, mes amis?

I've decided to stay in bed today to finally beat my headache.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Wed 20 May 2009, 6:45, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Freelancing
I emailed a web-design company about freelancing, and they replied saying that nearly every site they build is a Ruby on Rails site.

I'll probably get castigated for this but I'd have listed Ruby in 5th place behind the likes of Coldfusion and J2EE.

What are the pros and cons?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 19 May 2009, 22:53, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Oh dear God
I've fallen in love with ebay again. Looking round for new furniture, I'd be paying £400+ for something decent. One quick hop into ebay later, and I've managed to bag myself (hopefully, if I win the auction) an entire bedroom suite (triple wardrobe, bedside cabinet, chest of drawers, double bed with mattress) for £100. Well kick my kidneys into the middle of next week- suffice to say I am very happy with this scenario.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 19 May 2009, 21:33, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Jacobs Cream Crackers
I have a problem with Jacobs Cream Crackers, so I sent them an e-mail (enc in replies).

I'm sure I'm not the only one who suffers from this, let me know what you think.
(TheColonel, Tue 19 May 2009, 21:26, 14 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I didn't get the job.
My job, which I was already offered.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 19 May 2009, 21:08, 19 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Woo and Yay
Teh boss has decided I've passed probation and welcomed me to the team permanently. Which is excellent, seeing as I was so scared when I went into the review that I nearly threw up on him, and then afterwards told him I wanted to hug him.

In other news, does anyone work for a large business that uses PayPal to deal with clients? I'm looking into it for work and I'd love some tips :)
( Maladicta, Tue 19 May 2009, 20:49, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I just made spaghetti carbonara
I insist that in future you all cook it the way I just did, because it was amazing.

for 2 people
pancetta cut into strips
medium onion, very finely chopped
2 cloves of garlic
50g parmesan
3 eggs
chopped parsley
black pepper
spaghetti


cook spaghetti till al dente
fry up the pancetta till crisp then take out of pan, draining off most of the oil.
fry onion till transparent, add garlic and return pancetta to pan, fry for a while.
beat eggs, parmesan and parsley together with fuck loads of freshly grated black pepper.
take off the heat
transfer spaghetti to pan with a little of the pasta water
pour eggs and cheese etc over and mix well. if eggs start to scramble add a bit more pasta water, but not too much. should be glossy.
Transfer to warmed pasta bowls (warming them is important)
Devour
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 19 May 2009, 20:37, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Think you know music?
I have a foreign language mp3 in my collection from God knows where. It is named - and the ID3 information supports this contention - as The Fatima Mansions, "Humiliate Me". But while trying to find out what language it was in, I actually heard that track and it is completely different.

Here's the MP3. Anyone know who it is, or what language it is? I rather like it.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 19 May 2009, 20:14, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Yes, I am a small child
1st rule of computer systems: be careful how you abbreviate "analysis".



I'm also amused by the Quavers picture.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:11, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

who here is narked at Royal Mail?
I was brought up to believe that Royal Mail were not inept (there's a negation of 'inept' I'm sure,but I haven't a Collins to hand) and yet in the last three weeks they've managed to deliver one out of four packages - long after the estimated arrival date.
Has there been a decrease in efficiency? 25% effectiveness would get most companies put against the wall,I'm sure.
Meanwhile I'm getting tired of waiting.Who wants to bitch and kvetch abouy Royal Mail?
(Fuckpig "That's not even a pound a midget.", Tue 19 May 2009, 16:43, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I keep being reminded how rare common sense is...
A site I look after, which I visit once per week, is laid out very badly: Very long desks with just a few floor ports underneath with not enough network or power points.

In spite of being told numerous times they can log in to any machine and get the same desktop etc, people still physically move their computers on their own and are surprised when they don't work. Cue lots of phonecalls interrupting me from any decent bit of coding (ie, my 'real' job) I'm trying to concentrate on.

But that's not today's problem.

Health and Safety inspection soon, and guess who's got to rewire the whole floor so the cables are out of reach of clumsy feet?

I order a job lot of small switches and new network leads from the usual supplier. I ask the HR/Reception girls here to get a load of 6 way power adapters and cable mats. (Misco or someone are usually cheaper for that kind of thing than my IT supplier.) Gonna do this properly.

So when I get here this morning, I'm told by the girls my order's arrived, and they casually mention it cost £700. Sorry? £700.

They'd got a quote of exactly what I'd asked for, not called me, not asked for competing quotes, not checked online. £700. For ten 6 way adapters and 10 metres of cable mat.

They've since had a go at their supplier and he's dropped the cost to 'cost' - £350.

How do these people get through the day? It's no wonder they always seem stressed and snappy...clearly watching their backs.

So what monumental pinnacles of stupidity/naivity have those around you attained today?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 19 May 2009, 16:08, 16 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Pop Quiz
All that Jethro Tullery reminded me of one of music's more anomalous pairings...

Who can tell me (without Googling) who played guitar for Jethro Tull briefly in 1968 (and can been seen doing so on The Rolling Stones' Rock'n'Roll Circus) before returning to his original band and becoming world famous?

A prize of simply superb footage for the winner (and losers, I suppose) (EDIT - see inside for links)
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:53, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Someone shoot me now
I've been off work so long that I now know all the words to the theme song of One tree hill.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:40, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Distraction 2
Decided I was hungry and found a tin of 'sardines in tomato sauce' at the back ofthe cupboard. On some toast, with black pepper and paprika and a handful of grated cheese. Stuck it under the grill, 5 mins later.

Uber-Noms!

What have you all had for noms today?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:37, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I also need your advice dear B3tans.
I'm supposed to go the gym later but cannot be arsed. What can I do to burn calories that doesn't involve going outside, (it's raining), or a partner.
( girlinthehole, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:37, 19 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a suspicious amount of music with foreign lyrics
I don't know where it all came from.

I know that I deliberately got Rammstein and a couple of songs that are in Spanish, but that is all....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:36, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Just a quickie
Met a lovely young gentleman in Tesco this afternoon - as I placed (dumped) the contents of my shopping basket on the checkout thingy, he very nicely reached over and rearranged them neatly, even going so far as to put the blue 'this is my stuff' barrier behind them. I thanked him, and he said it was just common courtesy.

Then, this lovely man turned out to be an insaney person. He began headbanging and air drumming to his music on his ipod, while waiting for his stuff to go through.

From me thinking, aww what a love, I began thinking, oh what a shame. But how can I get across the social education about headbanging (quite vigorously) in public being a no no, especially if you wish to impress the ladies? ... without hurting his feelings?
(Psyche finishes work at the end of June! Yay!!!, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:35, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

just had a response from the government to an e-petition I signed a while back about Phorm and stuff
one of the lines in the response is this:


"The Government is committed to ensuring that people’s privacy is fully protected."

I had to laugh.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:32, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Distraction
I really ought to go clean the cooker, but that's such a chore. Anyone have any suggestions what I can do instead?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:28, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Speaking of roundabouts
Anyone here familiar with East Hull? There's a big roundabout at the end of Leads Road that has at least a dozen rabbits living on it. It's like Watership Down, but with more traffic and big lorries going past.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:18, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

What delights are tickling your earholes this afternoon?
I'm currently enjoying a song from Jethro Tull's Songs from the Wood. Before that it was a concerted blast of songs by Kaol's band.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:18, 38 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Made me smile.
Approaching a roundabout are 3 lanes, the middle lane allows you to go left or right, the idea being to get you in the correct lane for the next roundabout. So I'm in the middle lane, signal left so I can turn right at the next when some twat in a Punto cuts in front from the right. I hoot.
Tip: If you're going to hoot at someone who's cut you up, then hoot for about 6-7 seconds. A simple pip doesn't get the message across.

Anyway, so he's gone left as I was, and was in lane to turn right at the next roundabout. He signals right for the third exit, so do I (as that's where I'm going.) I think he thought I was chasing him because at the very last split second he lurches across the lanes and heads down the previous exit.

Amusingly, he hadn't seen the police car on the roundabout and the police took great interest in his lane discipline and went after him.

I wanted to double back and gloat but my missus needed a pee and wanted to get home, the spoilsport.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 19 May 2009, 15:11, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)