Apparently today is the first day of spring
Anyone seen any sign of it yet? Is the outbreak of flouncing on QOTW a rush of spring hormones, or some such guff?

alt: Beer has not gone up in the budget - does this make it a success?

altalt:yeah, whatever
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 7:48, 74 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

so yeah, thursday innit
Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough!
It isn't fit for humans now,
There isn't grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!

Which miserable God-forsaken dungheap of a town would YOU drop bombs on?

I'd properly bomb that London off the map, everyone who lives there is a cunt tbh. Probably tell mongy and rosalicious an hour before though. Only polite innit.

Alt: Momo's eating a cornflake. Momo is the best parrot. All other parrots are vastly inferior.

AltAlt: Did that person really murder that other person? Or is Battered a prick?
(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 6:35, 34 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Looks like Spimf has done a proper flounce; deleted posts an' ting.
Who's up for a wake?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:49, 11 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

so it turns out thatcher is faking her dementia
so that when the rozzers come knocking, she can pretend not to remember helping a series of famous people get away with pedophilia in the 80s, or so the guy down the pub reckons, what do you reckon
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:34, 9 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

ok

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 20:51, 35 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Fuck that short-arsed prick.
I'm going out playing cribbage tonight. What old peoples' activities are YOU engaging in?

Also: Jim Davidson has been re-arrested by Operation Yewtree. What bits of your past could land you in the shit?
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 19:51, 153 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Now guess what?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 19:44, 19 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I've been asked by a mod to apologise to kenny for what I said.
Sorry Kenny. Sorry Jess.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 18:18, 44 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Guess what?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 17:26, 28 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

If you had £9,426.48 to spend what would you spend it on?
Alt: I'm going to an open mic night tonight, has anyone ever been to an open mic night that wasn't shit?
(PsychoChomp, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 16:00, 135 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Go on I'll risk it
Suggest an appropriate sitcom, film etc for another B3tan to star in.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 14:46, 224 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

If I was chancellor I'd totally guff in the face of my front benchers
bit what would you do?

alt: piss play massage?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 13:07, 218 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Miserable thread is miserable.
Don't make Wednesdays worse than they are!

I'm going paintballing with work on Friday afternoon, followed by drinks!
Now I'm sure Im going to be a target for many a co-worker so what are your experiences with paintballing?

I was also going to do the whole Byker Grove thing and go "A CANNIT SEE MAN" Yes or no?

Alt. Something funny.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 12:30, 45 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Tell me about the last funeral you went to.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 12:11, 39 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Bad Decisions
Tell the group of your best and worst decisions
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 11:02, 245 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

My day gets better and better.
My new best friend Geoff Suprendo just collected his latest purchase.

One of my staff tells me that post-Crackerjack he enjoyed a stint on Countdown. What surprising facts about The Great Suprendo do YOU know?

Alt: Nice one yeah
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:03, 73 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

New thread, because Twitter is shit.
www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/19/westboro-equality-house-aaron-jackson-rainbow_n_2906337.html
This is the best IRL trolling I've seen for ages. What's your favourite trolling?

alt: pricks

Alt:alt:
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:01, 6 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

George osbourn has just joined twitter.
https://mobile.twitter.com/George_Osborne/status/314287245869842433/photo/1

Best comments so far:
@sazza_jay
Ooo am I the first? You're a twat. @George_Osborne

If you could tweet one message to the chancellor what would it be?
(PsychoChomp, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:00, 22 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Does anybody have any more recent bereavements we can mock?
Because Battered doesn't seem to have been naughty stepped yet.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 7:55, 193 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

whats a good excuse for working from home?
I'm torn between "boiler repairman" and one I've been saving, "neighbour got busted at 2am and I've had no sleep". Lots of people work from home but sadly I have no sick kids. I should totally have built a single dad persona but it's too late for that.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 2:28, 7 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Edited at the request of a mod who gave me a quick stepping.
Sorry Kenny. Sorry Jess.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:21, 6 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

OMG GONZ CHERYL OMG OMG

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 20:28, 89 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

the Anti-placid thread
My job has changed under my feet and is now a bit shit, is your job shit?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 17:38, 104 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

ever been on a hovercraft?

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 16:13, 156 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Bangers and mash
or Toad in the hole.

What's the best sausage based dinner for this chilly night?
(PsychoChomp, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 16:11, 51 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

how do you make your tea, crucially at what stage do you put in the milk

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 15:24, 91 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Who's got the best-looking spouse on here then?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 15:16, 37 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

no it doesn't.

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 14:50, 67 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Bands that have aged well / badly
I listened to Therapy? for the first time in years the other day. Whilst it's easy to see why I thought Troublegum was the dog's bollocks when I was 16, it has not stood the test of time well at all. Conversely The Wildhearts still sound as enjoyably brash as they did in the mid-90s. Who's aged well or badly in your opinion? Please note; "Oasis don't sound any worse now than they did then" is not a viable answer, as they literally could not sound any worse under any circumstances.

Look fuck off the last thread was about Fleetwood Mac, at least I'm trying.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 13:58, 195 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

which fleetwood mac song most encapsulates your personality?
fleetwood mac are shit
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 13:02, 124 replies, latest was 12 years ago)