Hi, I'll be your group leader for this session.
My name's Noel, I'm 35 and I like breasts. In my spare time I walk, cook and listen to music. You, there, why don't you introduce yourself and tell us a little about you?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:00, 186 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm psychochomp and I'm hungry.
Off out to lunch now missing you all already.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:04, Reply)

I'm a very private person
And, err, that's about it really.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:05, Reply)

Bar the fucking of dogs?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

Well, there is that.
But have you heard of ANY dog complaining? Have you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I don't speak bark.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

Hi, my name's Agnostic
I'm 22, and I'm partial to a proud, perfectly protruding pair of Purple People Eaters.

In my spare time, I enjoy surfing the web, gaming, going drinking with friends, and from time to time doing a little bit of cooking. I come from a large family, I feel this has allowed me to develop somewhat of a thick skin when it comes to insults, while granting me a truly dark sense of humour.

I was once described by a famous academic as being a "cisgendered heteronormative bastard." I feel that sums me up quite well.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:06, Reply)

I can sum you up using 30 less letters.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

i think you'd only need 4, wouldn't you?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

'King' does only have 4 letters, after all.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:28, Reply)

I'll have six more please Carol

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:29, Reply)

'of QOTW'?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:30, Reply)

'of shit'
roffles / sick burn / zing etc etc
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Are you caling Chompy SpankyHanky?
That's going too far
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:36, Reply)

With only 7 more letters you could have "fucking shit"

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:40, Reply)

I thought that was what he was going for, then realised the number of letters were wrong

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

You win the bullying prize!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:50, Reply)

omg amazing
THANKS
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:57, Reply)

Hello.
I'm b3th, I'm 37, and I don't like breasts. Especially my own.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

This is a very sorry state of affairs.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

Go to the supermarket of your choice.
Pick up one very large box of soap powder. Attach to your right chest.

Repeat with the left side.

Walk around for the whole day trying not to overbalance.

Aside from the general squareness of shape, this is essentially my life.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Go to the supermarket of your choice.
Pick up one very large box of soap powder. Attach to your right shoulder blade.

Repeat with the left side.

Walk around for the whole day being perfectly balanced.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

Hahahaha!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:13, Reply)

5. Profit
You know, I had never thought of that.

I'll try it the next time I go.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:32, Reply)

i'm rachelswipe
i don't particularly like breasts but i do talk about them a lot. today they are attractively encased in a black v-necked top with a gravity defying bra that makes them appear savagely pert. it's cold in here so you can almost see my nips through them. if you're a total perv. i have teamed them with a short black skirt, sky-high black heels and some fab very pale pink lacy tights.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

You know, I'm willing something to happen
but still my trousers stay unpitched.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

am i really dim
i don't understand this!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:14, Reply)

I think 'by' is meant to say 'but'

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:28, Reply)

*rolls eyes*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:32, Reply)

one of the side-affects of age I guess

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Ooooh ouch.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:40, Reply)

hahahahahaha
i fucking love this xx
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

*nervously clears throat*
Hi, I'm Labia Majora, I'm 29 and I also like breasts. I love tattoos, video games and music. My default emotion is probably guilt.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Stop doing that

(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:11, Reply)

I can't help it
I'm really awesome, but feel bad because you aren't.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:15, Reply)

My name is Guybrush Threepwood
and I want to be a pirate
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

I like this

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

*high-fives*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

Gaybash Weepsnood?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:26, Reply)

here's a news story i DO like
it's from a legal mag that you guys won't subscribe to, so thought i'd copy it here... what a total tool!

"Now, not all of us look back on our student days with glazed eyes and nostalgic yearnings to re-live those halcyon days. Some of us are still hanging on to grudges against professors who imparted some hurtful comments on our essays and others feel it was a waste of their youth. But few seek £100,000 in compensation.

First of all, we apologise for the source of this story; the Daily Mail is hardly renowned for its reporting of legal news. Or indeed the truth in general. However, we still felt this was worthy of a mention.

Oxford graduate Maria Abramova is suing her law college after failing her exams. She claims that ‘clearly negligent’ tuition had the knock on effect of making her fail to qualify as a solicitor, led her to flunk the New York Bar Exam and has made it ‘psychologically difficult’ for her to take legal exams which is proving to be a boulder-like stumbling block in her blossoming legal career.

As retribution, she’s demanding the Oxford Institute of Legal Practice pay up £100,000 in compensation. As the High Court ponders her claim we can’t miss the distinct reek of sour grapes in the air"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:15, Reply)

she should be kicked in the cunt
hard
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:16, Reply)

Yes
A full on cunt punt. With a run-up.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:22, Reply)

Til her tits explode?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:26, Reply)

I failed my Masters
due to piss poor supervision at a famous london university located near a lot of famous london museums.

The idea that could have she received crap teaching at Oxford is not really that surprising.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:28, Reply)

I sort of agree, most of my teaches at school were drunk or rapey
I doubt this helped me terribly...but's it's no the be all and end all especially for a University student.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:29, Reply)

My A Level German teacher
wasa raging paedo, and was knocking off a large number of the sixth form girls. As a munter of long standing, I was not one of those 'lucky' ladies.

When he was asked to leave, my class was left without a teacher for three months. I blame him entirely for the fact that I only achieved a B in what was essentially my best subject.

Cunt.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:50, Reply)

I bet you know what's German for
"Get your hands off me you filthy bastard".
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:58, Reply)

I also know the German for
I know what you're up to you freak of nature, and I'm going to tell the Headmaster.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:04, Reply)

If you can say that in completely authentic German accent I think you could go into business
*gulp*

"Yes, Fraulein".

*trembles*
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:36, Reply)

My A level french teacher died of cancer half-way through our course
He's not the entire reason I failed it though...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

I donKt think it's Oxford she's blaming
It says law college
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:40, Reply)

Fair point
I was really pointing out that people taking legal action against colleges and university when the whole thing has become a business transaction is not surprising and will likely become more widespread.

When you personally are paying thousands of pounds to get an education, the educator has a duty to ensure it carries out the teaching to the highest standard.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:45, Reply)

it's most likely that she is just a fucking spastic though
I bet a significant proportion of her peers did perfectly well.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

I don't think there is any reason to think that she's a fucking spastic
It's just as likely that a significant proportion of her peers thought the course was fucking shit and taught by arrogant cunts who viewed themselves as doing these students a favour by deigning to teach them, but who were able to get good enough grades to do what they wanted.

Admittedly the idea that exams have become "psychologically difficult" doesn't really help her case not to be considered a fucking spastic, but it could easily be case of both statements being correct.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:50, Reply)

... she won't be representing herself and has elected to use a qualified professional instead.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:28, Reply)

surely the use of "blossoming"
is factually inaccurate and "floundering" would be better.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:30, Reply)

I wish you'd fuck off and stop asking me questions, I didn't come here to be questioned.

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:19, Reply)

haha
i quite like this.

how are you today, darling boy?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:27, Reply)

I DIDN@T COME HERE TO BE QUESTIONED!11!!!
I'm alrite treacle, busy busy though. I had been hoping you'd given jyp to the trainee over that easement, instead of going off to do it yourself.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:34, Reply)

nah, i'm too soft and wet in real life to make a grown man cry
i did the research myself, found a blinding answer, now just need to blister the other side with it.

what's got you so busy, i told you, i only need the one diamond on monday...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:38, Reply)

Trainees are there to be beaten, and made to feel miserable and all emo, thems the rules
I've got to revisit easements, as I'm hoping to surprise someone with an adverse possession of a vehicular access one. If successful they will not be happy, with the resultant drop in site value.
Ain't you got your internet husband to provide for you, what have you done with him by the way.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:48, Reply)

interesting
to us anyway. i doubt that's so to anyone else, but of course even a few years ago, you'd have had no chance on a vehicular easement, now they are all the rage.

he can't type when he is handcuffed to the bed, don't be silly.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

I saw the most fantastic wooden sleigh bed in Kendals last weekend.
It was huge and looked like it could withstand ground level nuclear detonation. I may sell my soul and buy it.
( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:59, Reply)

I'm looking forward to it, as they've been nothing but wankers
Unleash your knowledge - in excess of 12 years, registered land, undisturbed access on foot and by vehicle to the rear of my site via theirs. Should be straightforward.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:00, Reply)

I'm Amberl
Soon I'll be regretting my negative character traits of laziness, a default position of sarcasm and forgetfulness.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:22, Reply)

You'll forget why you can't be arsed to take the piss out of someone you're working with?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:29, Reply)

Oh holla sister.
Sitting here in the library, I have a 1000 words to write which is piss-easy but I've done no reading and I can't be arsed.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:45, Reply)

Fuck off lazy student
go and have a muffin or a subsidised coffee.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:52, Reply)

Diet and I dislike coffee.
Tea is so much more superior. Had one of the best cups of my life on Sunday. I was hungover and dehydrated and it tasted so so so so so good.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:03, Reply)

best tea I ever had
Was the morning after the bear-head party. Massive mug refilled four times with hot perfect tea
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

Mr Scruff Tea is awesome.
Come to Manchester and I'll take you to Teacup.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:15, Reply)

mmm tea
I want tea now
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:39, Reply)

Hi I'm NakedApe
and I'm a necropheliac, I also like baking, moor walking and puppies
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:25, Reply)

.....who cannot spell 'necrophiliac'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:30, Reply)

Fine
Hi I'm NakedApe and I'm a necrophiliac and a dyslexic fucktard, HAPPY NOW?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Gary Moore's fresh
on the menu then. If you like fat (dead) Scotsmen.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

Alright Ian?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Hi Maxine
*waves with child's severed limb*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:37, Reply)

Hello, my name is Tuggers
...let me tell you a little bit about myself, I like Twizzlers, and I like the Alligator Bob, and my favorite movie is Bloodsucking Freaks, just like your mama.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:33, Reply)

First question
How many feathers are there on a Puredew Chicken?
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:58, Reply)

Three...
...because it's the magic number. (Yes, it is)
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:07, Reply)

Hello, my name is Pops, I'm 28 and this is the first time I've done this sort of thing
I'm a web developer who likes technology, to cook and piss about on the internet. Although I enjoy breasts, I think (if it'll get me laid with anyone else in the class) a good personailty is better.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Hi, my name is, among other things, Lampers.
I am not short enough to be viewed as "very short", and my breasts are pale shadows of what they once were. I wear several items of jewellery that I rarely if ever take off, and I miss my piano. I have a stupid laugh and my bottom teeth are wonky.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:36, Reply)

Can you describe or use phonetic-text
so we can get a sense of that laugh, Lampers?
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:04, Reply)

Nothing can accurately portray the horror.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:05, Reply)

I mean, is it shrill?
Staccato? Freakily deep and booming? Help me out here.

Edit: If it aids the sharing process, I too am cursed with snaggle-teeth and girlish, falsetto laugh.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

your laugh is fine
At least you don't laugh so loudly you can be heard from two rooms away :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

Nothing wrong with a turbo-charged laugh
Just avoid high risk avalanche areas and nervous people.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:43, Reply)

My name is Blousie.
I'm old but have a twinkle in my eye and a spring in my step. Well that was until I became afflicted with some energy sucking alien that comes in my room at night while I'm sleeping and sucks all the life out of me.

I only like other peoples breasts.
( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:37, Reply)

And you like tuna surprise. Don't forget to tell people that!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:38, Reply)

No more tuna surprise for me Jeff.
It's too calorific : (
( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:39, Reply)

But fish is brain food.
I think it's caused by adding dolphin to each can of John West tuna.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:40, Reply)

Tuna is ok. It's just the surprise bit I have to leave out.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:41, Reply)

What is the surprise?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:42, Reply)

I'm not really sure. I know there is cheese in it and maybe mayo but I don't know what else.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

The surprise is...
That the Bigeye Tuna's anal fin is wider and shorter than the Yellowfin Tuna's. True dat.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:44, Reply)

I wouldn't touch a tuna's anal fin with a 10 foot barge pole.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:45, Reply)

Strange.
I always find the anal fin is the best bit on a fish. Mmmmm - crunchy!
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

crunch +musk
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

I saw Vipros' first as I was reading up the page
but needless to say I clicked both.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:48, Reply)

*bows deeply*
Alright?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Not too bad on the scale of things
Just can't concentrate for shit.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Story of my life.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:05, Reply)

Different strokes for different folks.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

crunch musk

edit: FUCK YOU NOEL! FUCK YOU RIGHT IN THE FACE!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:48, Reply)

Ahhhhhh yeaaaaah!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Guten tag.
My name is Montgomery Peregrine St John Boyce, I am a minor Baronet from the Scottish Borders.

I have at least one child, I live in a cupboard and have the debt of a medium-sized African country (such as Gabon or Chad). A prodigious onanist, I graduated from the Sorbonne in 1824 after which I became a professional nudist – until the big nudism crash of 1866, when the bottom fell out of the whole industry.

My hobbies are flatulence, insulting behaviour and tobogganing.

Cheers.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:41, Reply)

Oh dear, the bottom fell out?
I feel guilty laughing at that.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

+ and I'm indifferent towards the works of David Bowie.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

I think the word indifference is a little misleading.
He fucking hates him.
( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:46, Reply)

for some reason
I read that as 'a prodigious arsonist'.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

He does like a nice arse.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:50, Reply)

a nice one up the
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

I didn't know flatulence counted as a hobby.
I shall put it on my CV forthwith!
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

I'm Happybara
Chronic pill-popper; coward and knave; self-pitying prisoner of fear; connoisseur of nameless dreads and sleepless nights; fraud of a parent; inept lover with ever expanding waist. There's no punchline. I am a sinful worm. Forgive me.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:42, Reply)

No forgiveness here, chump.
We're happy to eat you alive though.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

Then punish me.
I am at the mercy of your high-heels and riding crop.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:46, Reply)

I think you've mistaken me for someone else, young man.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

I don't

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:48, Reply)

Well, it is very dark down here.

(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Haha, gutted.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

Me no nameless, batty-boy.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

Sorry! Jah has well and truly left the building.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

He left when that bobble-headed twat David Grey sang about Babylon.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

I'm Bella
I am 21, and I like shoes. In my spare time, I read, drink and write for websites. I'm quite small, but I make up for it by being a gobshite. Breasts are cool.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

Nothing wrong with a gobshite as long as they're well informed.

( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:51, Reply)

You should meet her, and tell her a band she likes is shit.
Then the true gobshite in her comes out, it's quite entertaining.

And I didn't say they were shite, I simply said I don't know enough, but what I know is shite
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Was this a post coital conversation?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Nope, it was a pub conversation with a few other b3tans

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:00, Reply)

But was it post coital?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:03, Reply)

which shite band does she like?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:59, Reply)

The Clash

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:00, Reply)

It's called the Agnostic Antichrist Cock
They're kind of weedy and thin and they don't have much staying power.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

Odd, I hear your wife is a fan.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

She's never seen them
Which is odd, because she was at the concert, but she kept saying no matter how hard she looked they were nowhere to be seen.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:02, Reply)

Haha, very good.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Hmmmm, I don't know if that applies to the Plymouth Bretheren who stand outside Barclays spouting shite of a Saturday.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Well informed, not 'well deformed'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Rest assured, I have never spouted shite outside a Barclays.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Hmmm you've forgotten to include fucking AA in there. I'm sure that's pretty much what you're known for.

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Don't be jealous
If you ask him nicely I'm sure he'll grant you a ride on the AA Love Train
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:06, Reply)

It's not really a train is it
More like one of these
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:09, Reply)

That's much cooler than fucking AA

(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:14, Reply)

What's your basis for comparison?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Hahaha
I am both amused and nauseous
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Hi, I'm Martin, I'm 32, from Norwich, and contrary to what I may have publicised I'm not really a telecommunications analyst
Contrary to what OTHERS have publicised, I like breasts. Just to posit a predictably opposing suggestion in your narrow minds, I also like Ballroom Dancing, but not Glee, or more accurately not this week's episode, which was shockingly bad.

I also like football, beer and movies. Grunt.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:05, Reply)

I was shocked by your Facebook status last night.
I don't think I can speak to you again. Except to tell you that I don't think I can speak to you again, apparently.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

I had, like, three
I'm guessing you're either a Gleek (unlikely) who thought that episode was actually good (even less likely) or one of those misguided people who think Rocky Horror isn't shite
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:14, Reply)

You like Glee
You don't think Glee is "not shite", you ACTUALLY FUCKING LIKE IT. You like Glee, and think Rocky Horror is shite. Can you not see how that is actively wrong?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:18, Reply)

Nope
I can assure you that the best possible outcome of any further discussion is that we agree to disagree
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:21, Reply)

You're such a cunt.
How are you today, anyway?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

Faintly insulted
Otherwise just spiffy. Yourself?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:28, Reply)

Darth!! come to my bash.
I want to spend the night dancing with a telecommunications anaylst from Norwich.
( girlinthehole, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:30, Reply)

OMG!
If he came I'd get to touch someone who had been on the telly!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:35, Reply)

Does it count as touching if the touchee is wearing a Hazmat suit?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

Bash? Bash!
Details please honey! Thank you for the invite, and thank you also for the recipe. Most kind :-)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

I'm OK
Good things: new site went up last night, managed to have a serious talk with my mum without her resorting to acting like a 15 year old.

Bad things: For some reason, my hair is in pigtails, so I look like a complete twat. Mum sent me a thouroughly depressing anti-valentines email forward. Ugh.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:32, Reply)

Your Mum sounds like a delight
Please could anyone who reads the above refrain from making wearisome jokes about Bella's Mum, this has the potential to turn into an actual conversation.

Oh, and the pigtails; POIDH
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:39, Reply)

My mum is properly awesome
And not just for the very impressive frontage she sports.

But I really, really don't need to be included in her list of "single mates".

Pigtails: i787.photobucket.com/albums/yy155/belladonnaanodyne/2011-02-09134457.jpg
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:47, Reply)

Your picture's wonky.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Your face is wonky.
/TGB
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:50, Reply)

Your Mum's face is wonky
YESSSS!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:51, Reply)

Cheater!

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:52, Reply)

Rebel.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:53, Reply)

I fixed it.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:52, Reply)

Thank you

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:53, Reply)

Still would

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Are you saying she looks like a MAN, you BASTARD?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:49, Reply)

I'm sure that sounded less creepy in your head.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:54, Reply)

Saw this and thought of you Bella
www.thatcherthemusical.co.uk/
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:56, Reply)

Nightmare fuel.
There's an Oscar-bait film coming out soon, isn't there?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:59, Reply)

I hadn't heard
I saw the BBC drama though
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:18, Reply)

Nah

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:57, Reply)

I stand corrected.
I have decided that I can't really be arsed with the new site already. Dammit. Can you invent me a time machine, please?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:02, Reply)

The exact second I invent a time machine you'll notified by a sudden ache in your fanny
and a deluge of new, unwanted memories
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:04, Reply)

Oh good, my first rape threat of the day
And I haven't even had lunch yet.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:05, Reply)

Your right, that was a bit Chompy
I'll incorporate your birthday present as part of the threat. Better?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:10, Reply)

Are you trying to say it's not rape if there's drugs?
I can go with that.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:11, Reply)

More that if I coke you up sufficiently
you might be up for it. But whatever works for you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:12, Reply)

You're a charmer.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:14, Reply)

Yeah, that's what you're after.
Charm.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:18, Reply)

Charm
And cock.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Will you settle for one out of two?
If I bring coke?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:22, Reply)

Not when you've got AA, no.
Although I can see why you've kept him a secret.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:48, Reply)

He-l-o-o-o-oh. Hel-l-lo. Ah... eh, lovely weather...er...
I, I can't see you, obviously, but I bet you've all got smashing blouses on. Er... um... my name's Richard, and, ah - ah-heeh - I'm looking for a, a friend. Eh - well, a lover really. But failing that a quick wriggle would do! Oh, and by the way, I am the Duke of Kiddiminster and extremely rich!
( Peej, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:11, Reply)

Bottom hasn't aged well.
The TV series, I mean. My bottom's aged fantastically.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 14:26, Reply)

Afternoon! Im known as Jason. Ive been a lurker for a good few years but have recently been chipping in when I can.
I mainly waste time on here at work, where I work for a tryannical boss, where my role is similar to Anne Hathaways in 'The Devil Wears Prada'... Funnily enough, he does!

I used to DJ professionally for 10 years but lost a lot of my hearing so had to quit. Still love my music and films.

Also recently relocated to manchester from the North East and am McLovin it.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 15:28, Reply)