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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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What's next now the football is done?
Wimbledon?
What's your favourite thing about Summer?

alt. What yer drinking tonight?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 13:58, 153 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
I like the birds in their summer clothes phwoar etc

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 13:59, Reply)
cor yeah this
Tits an' that yeah
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 13:59, Reply)
Even I like that!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:41, Reply)
Fuck that shit
World Cup is where its at baby!

Everything!

Alt:
Quirky Bird Shiraz
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:00, Reply)
I preferred Trace

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:04, Reply)
I'm thinking of luring men back to my house with the promise of drugs and booze
then strangling them and dismembering their corpses. The only thing I haven't figured out yet is where to put the remains. If anyone has any ideas I'd love to hear them. thx x
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:01, Reply)
Just chuck them in the pool and claim you don't know what happened for years and years
/Barrymore
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:02, Reply)
Awight up the back?
No...I'm not.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:06, Reply)
POW RIGHT IN THE HOTSPOT

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:08, Reply)
Top, middle....
or bottom?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:08, Reply)
Silly me, it's all in the inflection.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:09, Reply)

l
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:20, Reply)
Yes, sily me!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:27, Reply)
Second row.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:10, Reply)
Top, middle or bottom
I dunno, that seemed like it could've sounded a bit rude...
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:09, Reply)
This is twice this has happened to me today

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:10, Reply)
It must be you then

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:15, Reply)
Well I can't be anyone else!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:16, Reply)
Oh YOU
I wouldn't change a single thing
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:16, Reply)
Slurry

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:02, Reply)
Ah, I could feed it to animals couldn't I
I could even go to different farms. They'd never bloody catch me.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:06, Reply)
Drugs and booze you say?
Gaz me the address
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:02, Reply)
Nah, you're grass-fed
I'd eat you
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:07, Reply)
It's lovely grass as well
Eating me would get you stoned for a fortnight.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:08, Reply)
Well that's settled then!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:09, Reply)
Hydrochloric acid

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:03, Reply)
But then won't I be left with a whole load of sludge or something?
It doesn't dissolve a body down to literally nothing, does it? Or does it?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)
I can categorically tell you that Barry dissolved into nothing.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:06, Reply)
That's very interesting

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:07, Reply)
some acids preserve bodies
The main lesson from the John Bunting case.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:10, Reply)
Doh!
That's John Bunting for you!
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:18, Reply)
Give it to a sludge pervert. No questions asked.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:18, Reply)
Hmm...sludge perverts, eh?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:29, Reply)
Surely you must have at least ONE kebab shop nearby?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:12, Reply)
Hey, yeah
In fact, there's one where a friend of mine eats at regularly. That would be a neat little secret.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:16, Reply)
Why do you keep giggling?
All I said was that my doner is a bit chewy
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:15, Reply)
Don't be daft, it's a cashew, not a finger nail

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:22, Reply)
YM.
No thanks, tennis is for benders called Tiger Tim.

YM's dripping gunt.

alt: YM's gunt.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:04, Reply)
My Mam doesn't have a gunt. she's slim

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)
Not when she's full of Daddies sauce.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)
I prefer HP

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:19, Reply)
Hard Pricks?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:21, Reply)
Beer, birds, breasts, binoculars.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:04, Reply)
I want some drinking binoculars.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)
Short skirts and tit tops.
I get all goose bumpy if I wear them in winter.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:10, Reply)
Whatever you do
and I cannot state this hard enough

DO NOT WEAR YOUR CARDIGAN
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:13, Reply)
Cardies are back in. Thierry Henry says so.
In cricket news, Matt Prior is a ham-fisted fuckwit. Drop a sitter. FFS.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:18, Reply)
My cardigan is awesome.
Once winter rolls around, that piece of killer knitwear will ride again.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:20, Reply)
ALT

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:17, Reply)
Alright Fred West!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:22, Reply)


(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:46, Reply)
Right, I'm off into town
Anyone want owt?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:17, Reply)
Hahaha. "off into town"
You provincials crack me up.

I AM ALWAYS IN TOWN.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:23, Reply)
DUN
Free pulled pork pasty!

pastyroulette.greggs.co.uk/
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:52, Reply)
What's the vegetarian option?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:55, Reply)
I believe its called "get fucked"

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:55, Reply)
A lot of places seem to be offering that these days

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:56, Reply)
Fresh chillies and spring onions for my chilli tonight
SORTED
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:56, Reply)
ancha chillies and chipotle chillies as well as yalepanoss?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:02, Reply)
Just generic finger chillies for sprinkling on the top with the spring onions and sour cream

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:04, Reply)
save me some

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:04, Reply)
Chillies or chilli?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:05, Reply)
chilli
I'll send a courier round for it. I'll get the firm to pay.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:05, Reply)
haha!
I bet you would too
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:09, Reply)
I need a piss, 10 'likes' and I will have a piss.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:51, Reply)
liekd and shaered
xx
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:52, Reply)
thx hun xx

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:53, Reply)
omg I need a wee now!
Haha you couldn't make it up
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:55, Reply)
ha ha no way thats mental

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 14:56, Reply)
Driving to Lancashire, so can't drink till I get there. I'll try a local cask ale, Robinsons is nice, or Hydes.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:01, Reply)
Are you going to have Betty's Hotpot for your "tea"?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:02, Reply)
I'll have something else for my dinner, ty. Tea is a beverage. Hotpot is actually very nice, simple and easy. Bit like Swipe.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:06, Reply)
I thought "tea" was the evening meal oop North.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:09, Reply)
Not particularly North I don't think.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:13, Reply)
WANKashire more like!!!
Cask GAYle more like!!!
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:13, Reply)
Lemmy is bent.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:14, Reply)
And?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:16, Reply)
Homophobe!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:06, Reply)
Depending on where in Lancashire you are
Try. Old school brewery if available.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:37, Reply)
omg frog and swipe
www.b3ta.com/board/11084085
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:14, Reply)
ha ha brilliant i love tired old jokes

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:17, Reply)
Isn't that what 98% of this website is?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:23, Reply)
Yes, and as I said, I love it

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:24, Reply)
Shame about the 2%

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:41, Reply)
Jews mate, stealing all the new jokes and keeping them for themselves.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:42, Reply)
Christ, I've still got more than an hour left
I have lost to will to groove
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:24, Reply)
OH NOES!
Get a brew and think about what your hats will be up to this weekend
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:26, Reply)
I've only just finished one
GOD I'M BORED
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:32, Reply)
I'm taking a youtube journey through shit 90s dance music for some reason
Darude Sandstorm FTW
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:33, Reply)
I know what I want, and I want it now
I want you, cause I'm Mr Benn.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:35, Reply)
*blows whistle*

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:38, Reply)
Technically 2000

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:13, Reply)
That too

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:17, Reply)
Just imagine what it would be like if you had to work tomorrow
I don't have to imagine :(
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:26, Reply)
As soon as I left retail
I swore I would never work a weekend again. You have my sympathy.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:32, Reply)
I'm on standby for tomorrow
£100 for fuck all and double time if phoned up
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:34, Reply)
Nicely
What do you do?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:35, Reply)
IT innit
Site doing an upgrade themselves and instead of paying us to do it for them out of hours, they pay a smaller amount for a safety net. If it goes tits, they'll end up paying more anyway
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:37, Reply)
Sounds about right

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:52, Reply)
I only work one in three, but I fucking despise it.
AAAAND I don't get any extra money for it.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:35, Reply)
That's no good
Is it a long day?
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:37, Reply)
8-12. 4 hours of absolute tedium. It's like I'm being punished.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:38, Reply)
Well at least you have the rest of the day.
*silver linings*
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:52, Reply)
BUT I WANTED A WHOLE DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:55, Reply)
I know babe, I know :(

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:58, Reply)
Just stay up late!
Go on, I wont tell your mum
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:59, Reply)
I really am quite fed up about it.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:01, Reply)
Saturday CANS

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:03, Reply)
Saturday curry and lashings of Cobra

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:04, Reply)
\o/

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:16, Reply)
*stompy feet*

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:12, Reply)
Are we nearly there yet?

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:51, Reply)
nnnnnnngg.
I'm done.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 15:51, Reply)
'kin hell. I just had to do some work there.
Got a nice bottle of Sparkling Chardonnay and Prosecco for tonights antics
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:07, Reply)
I've just had a lovely nap.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:18, Reply)
Just finishing off odds and sods of work and youtubing

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:21, Reply)
I really can't be fucked today.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:25, Reply)
T-7 mins and counting
Get me the fuck outta here
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:41, Reply)
15 for me :(

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:43, Reply)

m ch
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:45, Reply)
haha!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:46, Reply)
Pub!

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:46, Reply)
The lovely Mr Bonzo Dog suggested this brewery, this home bar sounds good for a piss up.
www.oldschoolbrewery.co.uk/our-bars/
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:54, Reply)
You should organise a bash and then not go, in case Dozer turns up.

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:57, Reply)
I don't trust him Jeff, he is bummed by hamsters, and doesn't use a thesaurus.
Baseballcap too.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:00, Reply)
I am now LEAVING WORK and may indulge in TRAIN IPA and PRETZELS

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 16:58, Reply)
I'd love train cans. Unfortunately, I have to soberly drive. :((

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:06, Reply)
Does your commt take 1:45 though : (

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:23, Reply)
I'm in work with cake and champagne
as we IPO'd today, woo!.

Not that it makes a blind bit of difference to me, apart from desk champagne.
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:02, Reply)
IPO'd?
reward for working? I don't understand this. Having said that, student brought us cake the other day
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:17, Reply)
best thing about summer
is always having to wear hats and suncream.

alt: EVERYTHING. 80s party, I'm being a kind-of goth with neon orange tights
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:16, Reply)
Suncream is for Australians and queers

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:24, Reply)
not if you're pastey and want to be in the sun for more than 10 minutes
sun burn loses its lustre after the millionth time
(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:25, Reply)
althouogh not its red shininess

(, Fri 20 Jun 2014, 17:26, Reply)

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