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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

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Yeah alright fuck you
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I have a day off so woo to me.
What the fuck are you thankful for?
I'm thankful for my family.

Alt: What are you not thankful for?
I am not thankful for credit checks and cunts that mooch off the system for food stamps to buy things like steak and ribs.
You're on welfare bitch, buy hot dogs and hamburger helper.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:31, 286 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I'm thankful
for, after a lot of trying, finally having a good man looking after me.

I'm not thankful for having had to try so hard and meeting so much crap.

I'm thankful for my parents too, despite hating them sometimes, and for having been born where I was, with enough money to live, and have an education and now a good job.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)
I'm British, I'm not thankful for anything.
In fact, I have a massive sense of entitlement and feel that I haven't got all that I'm owed yet.

/state of the nation blog.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I need some of that in my life

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Oh it's fine when it's you with the sense of entitlement.
It's a right bitch when it's apparently everybody else aside from you.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)
I'm thankful for not having to eat turkey tomorrow
once a year at christmas is enough
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:38, Reply)
yeah, I don't really like turkey at all
and for some unknown reason I was beyond thrilled when I won a free turkey at the supermarket
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)
Free food is always awesome
how did you win it? Or is "win" an american term for "steal"?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:31, Reply)
it was less of a win and more of an earn
here we have "bonus buys" and you get bonus points for buying certain things and after 300 points you get a certificate for a free turkey under 20lbs.
They were all 12 pounds and I was majorly disappointed because of this which is stupid, I don't fucking like turkey and the leftovers will likely go in the bin.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:34, Reply)
Your doggie would like the leftovers
or is it bad to give them people food?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:41, Reply)
v bad

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:46, Reply)
Give it to a homeless shelter?
Better than chucking it
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:10, Reply)
we don't really have one
may send it home with my gran
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:22, Reply)
I'm thankful for what I've got.
"Diamond in the back, sunroof top, diggin the scene with a gangsta lean wooh-ooh-ooh"
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:40, Reply)
I'm thankful
That work have finally realised nobody is at any of our sites on Christmas and New Years Eve and have given us the afternoons off for free, meaning I get to spend it in the pub! I'm also thankful for our "wonderful" Royal wedding which allows me 11 days off for 3 days holiday

I am quite entertained by the lunchtime student protests in Newcastle at the Monument where 50 or so student have about 150 police to watch them, complete with helicopter, police photographers, screaming police cars, etc. No overkill there, no sirree bob.

Alt:
I am not thankful for the chocolate machine running out orf Double Deckers. BAH!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Double Deckers are beautiful. Especially frozen with a cup of tea.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Not had them frozen but cold is lovely!!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
Frozen Mars Bars are also excellent.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
...inserted in the anus.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I think this goes without saying
please
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)
but it would be polite to at least ask first.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
Surprise chocolate!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
*braces self*

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
*inserts*

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
*doesn't feel anything*
*is bitterly disappointed*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:40, Reply)
No one had mentioned that for a while :(

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:54, Reply)
I would imagine the cooling would help
after the thorough workout
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Can get a bit bad when they melt and you have gooey caramel leaking out of your anus.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:57, Reply)
again

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
Sorry about that.
I didn't realise you were sensitive about the issue.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:03, Reply)

issue anus
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:07, Reply)
You do know it's not true?
That's the only problem I have. The more insane ones are ok. But I WILL NEVER HAVE ANAL SEX
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:08, Reply)
tell that to the rape van.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:12, Reply)
+ again after the prolapse

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:14, Reply)

the prolapse SexFace
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:17, Reply)
hahaha!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:18, Reply)
Double Deckers are probably my favourite chocolate bar
it's also a term for shitting in a toilet cistern
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:46, Reply)
Hahahahahahaha! Brilliant.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
sitting on the bog the wrong way round is called "AC Slatering"
after the "Saved by the bell" character who sat on chairs that way
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:57, Reply)
Whereabouts in Newcastle are you?
I was in town earlier, took me a while to realise what the helicopter was there for. The whole of Haymarket is on lockdown, despite the fact I saw a whole four students with protest signs.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:57, Reply)
Next to Manors Metro station.
Wandered over into town round Monument and the market thingy and there were about 50 students there
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
You live by Manors?
That must be depressing. There's nothing there.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)
No, just work there at the Technopole
I live in Backworth
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
I don't even know where Backworth is.
I live in Jesmond with all the other student twats. I hate everyone here.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)
Haha!
Backworth is near Shiremoor or if you'd prefer inland from Whitley Bay
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:34, Reply)
I like Whitley Bay/Tynemouth
Mainly because over the summer I had nowhere to stay so lived in my mate's family's hotel on the seafront for a week. My very own Alan Partridge experience.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:37, Reply)
Thankful for my delusional nature
not thankful for how shit Arsenal are at the moment it's making me sad.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Do an 'Arsene' and blame the ref(s).

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
Or
"the other team are disgraceful and didn't just step aside and let us play our beautiful Tesco-Value Barcelona stylee"

Although, having said that, Arsenal were a bit robbed last night. Although I might have more sympathy if they actually TRIED to put the ball in the fucking goal.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:55, Reply)
we were shit too, not good enough at all.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:03, Reply)
I am thankful that,
having discussed dating flowcharts yesterday, today I have discovered this.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:47, Reply)
I like the distinction between Roar (Lion) and Rawr (T-rex)

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I disagree.
"Thanks" is never good, it's not even "Meh". It's BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD.

I've just given you a semi-decent seeing to and you're thanking me?! Good lord, boy.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)
I'm pretty sure it's impossible to go wrong with
"I'm going to pound the farts out of you."

But yeah, it should pretty much always be you doing the thanking ;P
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
Unless it's a blowjob on a trampoline.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
That sounds likely to involve an unacceptable amount of teeth.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:10, Reply)
No, I did ok.
It was my first post on here, I gave someone I erally liked a blowjob on said trampoline*, and at the end of it he looked down at me and said "Well done, [name]. Don't mean to sound patronising, but well done". The last time I sucked off the ex he did it to me too.
Either I'm decent or they feel sorry for me.


*I found out recently he was lying on his back looking up at the stars trying to work out how he got into that situation :(
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:12, Reply)
Eeek
What a raging knobend. I'm surprised you didn't smash his face in - I'm fairly placid and I would have done...
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
Surely, if you're already on a trampoline,
a high-altitude elbow-drop to the nuts would be the way forward?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:22, Reply)
This is a beautiful idea
have ten internet points.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
+ rebounds!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
Superb!
It hadn't occurred to me that on a trampoline, with a high enough start, you could get two or three elbow-drops for the price of one.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)
by no means the worst thing that's been said
I think the king of that has to be, at 6am, an ex I shagged because I was ver very very very drunk asked me to leave because he "wanted to go downstairs to play FIFA and pretend this never happened".

-takes a bow-
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:23, Reply)
That should have seen him heading downstairs rather faster than he expected.
Then you could primly descend, maybe with a few choice tramplings on the way past. He'd look up at you as you paused at the door, and just as he begins to form the word "why?" you'd cut him off, wink and depart with "Of course, I was never here."
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
And you said the Barefoot Story wasn't interesting!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:34, Reply)
Not given the build-up, no.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:35, Reply)
I think you hyped it up yourself.
I was a little traumatised though. But at least there was lots of sex.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
Fuuuuuuuuck
I think he's a good candidate for setting on fire. What a cunt!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
Haha, I then fucked him again 2 weeks later.
He's not even that good in bed. I'm just fucked up.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:35, Reply)
Arguably a little, yes
You're still only barely out of your teens though. Everybody is fucked up and angsty at that age - I know I surely as hell was.

and look at me now, a paragon of normality! *gibbers*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
I would never normally give out such advice, but in this case I think it's definitely applicable
Carry a knife on you.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:30, Reply)
I love Lab.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)

b mp
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:40, Reply)
Maybe that's your calling in life
Identifying and eradicating those of gross cuntitude.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:40, Reply)
I just someone to be nice to me.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:44, Reply)
Are we playing fill in the blanks?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)
You certainly deserve it

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)
you do need this

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:48, Reply)
Nobody is going to be nice to you unless you start being nice to yourself.
Sad but true.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:49, Reply)
Yeah
"If you don't want to walked all over, then stop lying on the floor with "WELCOME" printed on your front"

Cave Duck's Big Book of Homilys - In shops now.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:53, Reply)
^ this
also, if you can't even like yourself then what are the chances of other people managing it?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:53, Reply)
Bah! I was saving that for volume II
Stop giving away my best material.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)
I agree in principle
but it's not working with me and I certainly don't hate myself
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:53, Reply)
Yes you do.
You just don't know it yet. *laughs*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:54, Reply)
I really don't!
I whine about somethings like my legs/weight. But personality/mentally wise I'm actually alright with myself. I accepted a long time ago those are things you can't change
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)
Lampito:
Throwing herself on life's man-grenades.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:46, Reply)
hahahahaha

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:04, Reply)
If there's no bouncing involved, why is the trampoline even relevant?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
Useful for thrusting.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
I'm kind of assuming that they weren't actually bouncing about on the bloody thing like a pair of toddlers with ADHD
But I may be wrong though.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
Sounds unsafe to me.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:20, Reply)
I can't believe it's unacceptable to ask if you can smell what the Rock is cooking.
That would turn me on.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
Not if he's cooking sprouts.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
if the Rock is cooking it, it's going to be amazing no matter what

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:35, Reply)
Hang on a cotton-pickin' minute!
Where on this chart is "GERONIMO!"?

Otherwise, the most I've laughed all day. Ta for that!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:23, Reply)
I'm thankful that I'm being paid on friday
I'm not thankful by the amount.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)
I just ordered £100 of shopping,
I have spent more on herbs and spices than I have on booze.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Spectacular work.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
I might just buy a few crates of beer just to sort this out.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
Redress the yin/yang balance

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:00, Reply)
I have a good litre of gin kicking around in my room
but I'm contemplating the decent 2 for £20 at Tescos at the moment. A litre and a half of Russian Standard for that amount would see me very well.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
Done, 30 bottles of Kronenburg for £18

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:09, Reply)
KERCHING

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:17, Reply)
There's 24 Stella for £10 in Tesco currently

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
Meh, I'm not a fan of stella.
It's a premium lager of last resport.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:23, Reply)
Bottled Stella is my lager of choice at the minute
Well, it will be on the 4th, when I can drink it again.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
I shall also drink Stella on the 4th
as it is my birthday
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
Bash for me
The day I set myself to stay off the Lager till.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
Is that you, Yoda?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:05, Reply)
Sadly not

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:06, Reply)
You don't even have a wife, why would you drink Stella?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
Because it's damn tasty

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
I'm getting paid a decent amount, but on a Tuesday.
A Tuesday! What good is that to anybody? Friday's what you want, not TUESDAY.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
This^
Never a good thing
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
You could get a Dominoes two for tuesay thing
or maybe a better pizza delivered.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
Same here
Last working day pay is shit.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
i got paid on friday last week
i cried at the amount of tax that got raped out of my salary. then spent the feeble bobbins that was left to me on debauchery over the weekend.

and i have a wedding this weekend, so although it's a free bar, we also have taxi/hotel bills to pay.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
Your "feeble bobbins" is three times the average
You work hard and I don't begrudge you it, but "feeble" could be construed as a touch rich. Pun not intended.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:03, Reply)
tongue in cheek, k
that being said, i could have a LOT more fun if i didn't forcibly spunk 3k a month on crap like education, the NHS, transport... who needs that shit, eh?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
Yeah sorry
I'm not having the best morning.

EDIT: I do know what you mean, a third of your wage hurts however much it is.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
at 3K tax it's probably even more than a third.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)
Err, have you read your sig?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
err, have you read my sig?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:08, Reply)
hahahaha

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:10, Reply)
You pay £3K a month in tax?
Holy shit. I think your bottom line (cough) must still be pretty impressive.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:10, Reply)
My thoughts exactly!
And I grumbled at paying 1k a month in tax.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:11, Reply)
*snivels*
I grumble about earning 1k a month AFTER tax.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:20, Reply)
It's annoying to know I could earn 15-20k more just by moving to London
Albeit I'd also have to sacrifice a lot more free time, pay more in rent, and likely have to cut my hair and shed piercings :/
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:22, Reply)
You're not moving here.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:23, Reply)
Too right I'm not
My balls are safer here.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
Yes. SafER.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
I'm just going to leave them at home whenever I attend bashes in the future

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
What will Vee grab?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
One reason I'm leaving them at home

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:31, Reply)
And remember you'd get arse-raped for a tenner for a frigging salad every sodding lunchtime.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)
Aye
Stratford's not far off London prices though, so that wouldn't be a huge step up for me.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
this is very true
*sad faces*
bought all my family's presents and sent them off and my wallet is in paaaaaaaaaaaain.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:12, Reply)
Maybe one day you'll be ready to do that.
If you're happy enough now then why worry.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)
Precisement, Madamoiselle

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
I'd likely earn another 5k if I moved to London
that includes the weighting. Science sucks balls, it really does.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)
It's the good thing about my industry being rather small

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:27, Reply)
*huffs*
Oh well, I doubt I'd want -or be able- to do your job anyway.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)
Oh strikethrough, strikethrough...
*resists*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:30, Reply)
Micropenislolz

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)
I'm quite impressed it's even 5K
My salary goes up by £2300 in London. Fucking matched salary scales. Mind you, I can't complain, I'm not at all badly paid except when I remember the salary I left in industry :( :(
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
It's around that
a lot of the jobs at Imperial/UCL are fairly well paid even before the weighting. Around £20k is average for a technician now, but I'm a ways off that sadly.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:33, Reply)
ah, right
I thought all the academic scales were matched? I got the same salary when I moved from UCL to here because they couldn't pay a lecturer any more and they wouldn't give me SL straightaway. Bah.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
I think support staff are different to academic
Certain areas it's 17-21, but in places like Cambridge and London it's 20-24. Either way, it's always between 17-24.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)
ah, right so.
I'll hardly say "lucky you" given how shite support salaries in academia are.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:43, Reply)
Put it this way
If I'd gone in to the graduate scheme at McDonalds, by now I'd probably be earning twice as much. Sad, isn't it?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:46, Reply)
yeah. It really is.
Did you see the fucking GQ "rock stars of science" thing? how can a society be so fucked up? Why do we want our scientists to be compared favorably to rock stars? for fucks sake, in any civilised society it should be the other way round.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:06, Reply)
Remember of course that GQ has a target audience of
"Hurr, tits!"-grade australopithecines.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:16, Reply)
It's a US TV campaign I think :(
not just the magazine.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:26, Reply)
it's all relative
sometimes i love my job, love my clients, love my colleagues, think i am lucky to earn such a silly amount of money for such a great job.

then i have whole weeks of working 7am-2am, sweating over court deadlines and expert reports and witness evidence whilst juggling it with the more standard 8am-8pm bread and butter work and billing and business development and senior solicitor duties... during those weeks, they could pay me three times what they do, it would still not be a third enough!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:33, Reply)
Amen
I don't think anyone here seriously believes you don't deserve your pay, you work ridiculous hours for it.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:36, Reply)
i do enjoy whinging about it though!!!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:48, Reply)
If only they paid all of us that work that hard that much money....
That's not a complaint, mind, personal choice innit. fair play.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:41, Reply)
oh aye, absolutely
that's why so many people apply to be lawyers every single year, of course they aren't doing it for love of the law!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)
Come off it, puns are always intended.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
They usually are with me, yeah.
I'm low of brow and dragged of knuckle.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:07, Reply)
I am thankful for the health and happiness of my child.
I am thankful for my home, the fact that I have a job, my family, my health, my vast intelligence, my breeding, my devastating good looks, my encyclopaedic knowledge of obscure music and other useless shit, and for the fact that I am not a smelly African.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:57, Reply)
Haha!
I second this for myself!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:00, Reply)
You are SKILL
www.playgroundlaw.com/cgi-bin/browse.pl?sid=645
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:00, Reply)
hahaha!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:02, Reply)
I have some smelly Serf Efrican relatives
they don't loik the bliks
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
I always enjoy reading accent in written form.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:36, Reply)
"Diplometic emmunity!"
IT'S JUST BEEN REVOKED
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:43, Reply)
This thread has just put the song
'Reasons to be Cheerful' by Ian Dury and the Blockheads in my head.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
<comment about earthy lyrics>

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
<jokes about the disabled>

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
the fact that i am really struggling
to think of anything original to say suggests that i have posted too much of my brain on here, maybe it's time for b3tasuicide.

anyone who agrees can go fist a camel or be fisted by a camel, depending on preference.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
I am thankful for giving up smoking when I was mid twenties.
I could be looking like a right old hag by now.


*waits for obvious post from AA*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
Well, it's a good thing you did!
Means you got to stay beautiful.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
*waits for pandatron*

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:15, Reply)
It's just nice yang for all the bad ying he's inflicted on me.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:16, Reply)
I'm lovely to you in real life!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:17, Reply)
I don't call wandering round my home in lurid clothing being nice.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:18, Reply)
By wandering
you mean hiding in bushes, yes?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
No, she means wandering
Evidently she didn't like my summer outfit.
*sulks*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:19, Reply)
I fucking hate all this stop smoking bullshit from people (not you bgb, people in general).
If you don't like it fine, you have forced us out on the streets, you win now shut the fuck up and get on with your lives. Everyone poisons themselves somehow so pick your weapon of your choice and hurry up dying.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:12, Reply)
Got nothing against
handy amount in tax really.

Hardly wrong 'forcing people out' though, since although they have a choice to kill themselves they don't have the right to inflict it on others
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:15, Reply)
^This
We'll keep out of your business when you keep it out of our faces.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:17, Reply)
What about alcoholism then? that's forced on people everyday but fuck all is said about that.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)
How is alcoholism forced on you?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:30, Reply)
those 2 for 1 WKDS are just too hard to resist

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
As opposed to your face

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
I have a face that can launch a thousand ships

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)

ships murder inquests
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:51, Reply)
So basically one that can prompt a mass evacuation?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:10, Reply)
I damn near shat myself the first time I saw her, certainly.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:14, Reply)
Helps you get laid.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
I'm not sure how it is there, but here it's illegal to advertise on television for cigarettes but not for alcohol.
So there's loads of commercials glamorizing it.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:43, Reply)
they have some amusing alcohol awareness ads
showing a guy ripping his earring out, tearing his jacket, spilling kebab down himself and vomiting on his shoes, then it says "you wouldn't start a night like this, why end it that way?"
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:48, Reply)
that's funny
we don't have anything like that here
they're stuff like this
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTdzRaw55zo
and
www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFj3FJlBT8Q
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
I quite like American beer ads
not many ads over here actually have a sense of humour.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:04, Reply)
miller light has some funny ones this year
too bad miller light is disgusting
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:09, Reply)
you certainly can't call it beer
I'm thankful that in the last 10-15 years micro-brewed beers have become so available that you can actually get good beer in the US now.

I'm not thankful that American “beer” Budweiser is the biggest selling beer in the world and the last two times I was in Ireland, it was very visibly present in every pub I went to.

(It’s funny though when rednecks drink their Bud and say they wouldn’t drink anything but an American beer made by an American company when Bud is owned by a Belgian company. The same with Wild Turkey the “American” bourbon now owned by Campari and until recently owned by the French Pernod- Ricard)
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:27, Reply)
with the slight difference
that Wild Turkey is delicious (and not a bourbon)
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:29, Reply)
Especially not seeing that it's brewed with rice...

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:29, Reply)
No, wild turkey is a bourbon
www.wildturkeybourbon.com/

What makes a whiskey a bourbonis that it is brewed with at least 50% corn. otehr than that it can have barley, rice, rye, or whatever grain the makers feel is best.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:06, Reply)
Bud is brewed with rice, not Wild Turkey
Wild Turkey is a standard bourbon brewed with corn, malt and rye
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:10, Reply)
I think I got mixed up
because last time I had it, I had the rye whisky which a quick look at the internet tells me is only 20% corn. Whichever variety though, it's much much better than most bourbons. I'm very fond of it
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:18, Reply)
They do also make a rye whisky too so we were both right
I feel all warm and fuzzy now (maybe it's the Woodford Reserve bourbon I had with my pre thanksgiving lunch)
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:41, Reply)
I like Makers Mark.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:23, Reply)
Me too

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:42, Reply)
SHUT UP I LOVE BUD LIGHT
apparently they own stella now?
that's what someone told me last night
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:47, Reply)
ur dumb

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:49, Reply)
I'm very sorry for you.
It's off to the re-education center for you. Bud Light is NOT beer, it's horriblt tasteing carbonated water with a little alcohol and malt.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:08, Reply)
Budweiser was originally a style of lager rather than a brand, from the Czech town of Budweis.
The Americans made their own version and registered the name.

You can still get Czech Budweiser - Budvar and the dark lager is quite good.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:24, Reply)
You can actually get Budvar in the US now but they
have to call it Czechvar because Budvar is too close to Bud which has trademarked the name in the US.

It's not bad here but not as good as I got in Austria years ago. (I've never had the dark lager and didn't even know they made it).
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:46, Reply)
We're fortunate that there's a one really good pub nearby that, as well as having a good, ever changing,
selection of "real" cask ales, also has glass fronted chiller room with a selection bottled beers from around the world. There is a menu on the bar but it is a menu of beers rather than food.
I happened to see the dark lager in there and was intrigued (I don't normally drink lager at all). It's worth trying should you come across it. It's unmistakably lager, but with depth and body.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 18:01, Reply)
I'd probably make a point of not drinking Ketel One after that
though I've never seen it over here
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:29, Reply)
What BGB said
+ it's illegal to drink in the streets of most towns/city centres, arguably a similar law to the smoking ban.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:34, Reply)
when other people drink
liquid doesn't actually trickle into your throat. And as Labs and BGB pointed out you can't drink in public places either
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
I'm thankful for my sister trusting me enough to agree to be my guarantor straight away
I'm thankful my diet is working, that I get paid on Friday, and that in 2 weeks I get to see some of my favourite people!

Alt: I'm not thankful that my work has taken my holidays off me.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
I'm quite thankful that I live in a country that is mostly free from the worst elements of nature.
Extremes of temprature. earthquakes, tornados, monsoon, tsunami.
And it's also relatively politically and financially stable.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:11, Reply)
And don't forget tea and crumpets in the afternoon.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:15, Reply)
You're getting crumpet in the afternoon?
Then why so sad?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
They're not buttered : (

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)
They're rubbish anyway

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
You're a decent lad AA, but you have much to learn.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:38, Reply)
Never liked them
My ex housemate thought I was insane for that.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:46, Reply)
I hate the word.
It's the first syllable. I don't even want to type it. Eurgh.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:48, Reply)
Crum?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:03, Reply)
'Crump' is a fantastic syllable, and the crumpet is a bastion of English decency.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:08, Reply)
SHUT UP

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:13, Reply)
Crump crumpety-crump crumpety-crump crumpety-crumpety-crumpety-crump
(Repeat ad nauseam to the side-drum rhythm of Ravel's Bolero)
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:17, Reply)
Who was the Speedway World Champion in 2004, 2006 & 2009?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:46, Reply)
Off he went with a crumpety crump
CRUMP, CRUMP CRUMP.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:11, Reply)
I'm surprised after that much repetition
that you don't have cramp
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:20, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pr9h_7qZ94M
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:24, Reply)
Say what you like about those Africans Monty.
But they sure can dance.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:28, Reply)
Heh.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:29, Reply)
just looks like aimless flailing to me
maybe we need dozer to assess it's merits
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:33, Reply)
He sounds like a Japanese pugilist
'Go on! hit him! Clump him!'

'Ahh! Crump!'
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 17:26, Reply)
I just bought 12 of them.
NOT EVEN GOING TO LIE.

And some cheesecake.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:24, Reply)
What flavour cheesecake?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:25, Reply)
after evesdropping on my dad talking to someone yesterday about life and that
I'm quite worried about continuing to live here.
All he said was "I'm not worried about myself but I'm worried about my daughters future, if she has children..." and I was like fuuuuuuuuuck.
Our economy is going to tank.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:45, Reply)
I read that as 'chickens'

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
WHAT WILL THEY EAT?!
I haz no corn
I haz no weet
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
You don't even want to know what I misread 'corn' as...

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:10, Reply)
Stop being naughty or we'll be forced to pull up your skirts and spank your bottom.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:11, Reply)
Naughty!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:19, Reply)
i cannae say noooo

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:23, Reply)
That's my problem too!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:25, Reply)
I am thankful for my family and other animals
fraud squads, and also for delicious sandwiches.

Alt Q: I'm not thankful for people with a massive ego swanning round the place
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:14, Reply)
My favourite sandwich is nutella on really thick white bread. LOVE it.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:15, Reply)
I should be thankful for pretty much everything in my life
I have my health, a flat, a job I love, I'm skint but I'm not poor, a family I can depend on if I *really* need to (but who are a bit flaky otherwise), ditto for friends...
I'm still fucking grumpy about my lot though.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:23, Reply)
^this
Sometimes I'm annoyed with myself how everything I have still doesn't make me happy.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
Mostly I'm pretty cheerful
and when I'm not I do generally tell myself to man up and look around, it's not so bad...but sometimes I really do just think well what is the fucking point, eh?
*throws toy to floor and stomps off upstairs to bed*
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:31, Reply)
Well I missed the lottery thread below
but I am so tempted to buy one now
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
Euromillions rollover on friday...

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)
I might get one
because right now I could really do with a lottery win
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
I would get one
however I probably don't have £2 to spare until Monday...
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)
bugger
want me to get you one?
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)
but if you did that and she won you'd want to bludgeon her to death

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:50, Reply)
I'm quite laid back
and she doesn't get the ticket until after the draw

But seriously, get one on the same ticket as me and we can split it if we win. I don't 'do' the lottery anyway so it'll hardly mess me up
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:52, Reply)
Haha, no it's fine
I wouldn't say no to a holiday if you do win, though...
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I am thankful that I get to see lots of lovely people over the next week that I haven't seen in a long time. I am not thankful that I have about three pence and a fluffy mint in my purse to do so.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)
Plus, bash in 2 weeks?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)

If the three pence and a fluffy mint magically turns into some proper money, and I can find a place to stay, and take the weekend off work, yes!
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:33, Reply)
I think the Fluffy Mint is quite strong against the Thai Baht at the moment.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:37, Reply)
Well that's good
I was worried I was going to have to resort to scrounging off my parents.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)
*thinks*
Yeah, that might work better, actually.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)
You haven't met my parents...
Plus, imagine that conversation: "Heyyyy Dad! How are you? So, I was wondering - can I borrow some money to go meet strangers off the interwebz?"
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:51, Reply)
Just tell them you need money for an abortion.
Less worrying for them.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:53, Reply)
You might owe me a new set of lungs
I've just inhaled half my water, before coughing it back up. Ow.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)
Well I thought it was funny.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
So did I

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
well
I was just going to spend all the money I had saved to buy xmas presents and then borrow the money off them. But your idea has its merits.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:56, Reply)
Tell them it's a discussion website, that's how I describe it to mine!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)

This only solves one problem though, I still have nowhere to crash and have to persuade people at work to cover for me.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:57, Reply)
I'm due to be staying in the area with friends, if necessary I can see if they've got a spare couch?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:59, Reply)

Yeah, that might be necessary
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:00, Reply)
I'm seeing them this weekend, I can ask, and let you know over facebook?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Yeah that sounds good. Fuck it, I'm just gonna order my coach tickets now and sort out trivial details like not being fired and having somewhere to sleep later.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:05, Reply)
That's the spirit!

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:10, Reply)

Booked and booked. I look forward to meeting you all next weekend. I'm going to apologise in advance for anything stupid I do.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:12, Reply)
Don't worry, we've all done stupid things at bashes
BK bought non-alcoholic Beer.
BGB fell over and landed on me.
Lampito punches people.
etc etc
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:18, Reply)

Ah yes, I will fall over at some point. That's more due to being a bit crap at standing up though. Honest.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:30, Reply)
Can't be as bad at it as piston_broke, surely?

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:31, Reply)
I don't know.
All I will say is that my knees are often so mangled up they look like those of a four year old.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:35, Reply)
Don't worry, that was a reference to someone here giving stand up a go, and failing miserably
Fair play to him, he gave it a shot, I wouldn't.
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:53, Reply)
Now we're getting somewhere.
"I've got the opportunity to widen my social circle by meeting up with people from the "debating society".
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 15:58, Reply)
"We discuss current issues, recipes, kittums and religion"
"What was the 3rd one again?"
"Erm...Religion?"
(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:02, Reply)
Mass debating society more like

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:21, Reply)
Cum as you are.

(, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 16:43, Reply)

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